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I've been into ABDL/CGL for a few years now, I am a AB/Little with a headspace of about 1-4 although i've never really been able to experiment with it due to not having the privacy to do so till recently. I'm very kink open so i'd love to hear wbat your into. I would say that i'm very nerdy, sweet, kind, thoughtful but also rather timid, anxious and have a low self esteem and need to work on myself some more. Some of my Hobbies/Interest include Video Games, Metal and Rock Music, Baking, Reptiles, Anime, Writing/Reading, Rping and so much more. I'm glad to be on this site and hope to make some new friends ^w^. ❤️
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Hello, This is the first chapter of the first story I've ever published. Critical feedback and corrections are more than welcome, but please bear in mind that this story is completely fictional and I the medical aspects aren't intended to be accurate to real life. Chapter 1 – A Natural Approach Oliver sat, staring at his shoes with his chin in his hand, occasionally looking around the brightly decorated doctor’s waiting room and catching a reassuring glance from his mother, Abigail. He let his legs swing idly to pass the time but quickly stopped so as avoid any unnecessary attention. “Oliver? Oliver Wilson?” he heard a voice enquire. He looked up again to see the doctor poking her head out of the office. He trailed behind his mother with his head hung low as the doctor welcomed them into her office. This was a new doctor. She introduced herself as Dr. Richardson and explained that she would be taking over for Oliver’s old doctor, a kindly, easy-going old man who, despite his general apprehensiveness about doctor’s appointments, Oliver had been fond of. By contrast, she was much younger – late thirties, with her hair tied back in a ponytail and an energetic attitude. She seemed eager to make a good impression on her new patients and Oliver found himself warming up to her. Over the course of the appoint, any lingering doubts in Abigail’s mind that this woman might be anything but a competent expert with her son’s best interest at heart were also quashed. After a review of his file and the usual battery of tests and questions, Dr. Richardson broached a sore subject. “Well” she intoned in a way that Oliver could tell she was choosing her next words carefully. “I’m a little concerned about young Oliver’s growth.” she began. That was the understatement of the century as far as he was concerned. At just under 4”6’ and 64 lbs, he was the smallest kid in his sixth grade class by a mile. “Some other doctors might be inclined to recommend hormone injections, but I’d prefer to exhaust our natural options before we go down that path. From what you’ve told me about Oli’s sleeping habits and his picky eating, the good news is I think there’s a lot of room for improvement. I’m going to prescribe a course of two nutritional supplement. One for the day to help bridge any deficiencies in his diet and a night time one that will also help with sleep. You can get them at a speciality shop at the edge of town.” she explained as she typed up the prescription. “We’ll see how this goes and then regroup in a few months. Don’t hesitate to call if you have any questions about the treatment.” Dr. Richardson said as she stood, bringing the appointment to a close, Abigail thanked her and led Oliver outside to pay, where he was too caught off guard by the receptionist’s offer of a lollipop to decline it before his mother accepted it on his behalf and prompted a stuttered “Thank you.” out of him. They made their way back to the car where the journey home was mostly in silence as Oliver contemplated his ambivalence the outcome of the appointment. He was eager to hit his long anticipated growth spurt, and he was more than relieved to avoid any needles, but he didn’t even like most of the foods he was told to eat. He didn’t like the sound of whatever a nutritional supplement was, but he felt he had escaped lightly over all. They weren’t long home before he was lying on his stomach in front of the TV listening to the fan on his game console churning as he nonchalantly kicked his feet in the air. “Hey kiddo.” interrupted his mom. He braced himself to be told to get some fresh air or find something constructive to do, but it didn’t come. “I’ve gotta run a few errands, wanna tag along for the ride?” she offered. “Can’t I just hang out here?” Visits to the doctor scored sympathy points that they both knew he he was angling to cash in. She paused just long enough to make him doubt his strategy. “Are you sure you’re going to be okay on your own?” she teased. “Mooom” he groaned but couldn’t help but smile. “Well, okay, but don’t let any axe murderers in.” “Not unless they have a puppy.” he countered as he turned his attention back to his game. Abigail punched the address Dr. Richardson had given her into her car’s GPS and pulled out of the driveway. The place was about 25 minutes drive. Technically within the town limits, but not a part of town she had ever been too or would have necessarily considered in town. She drove without the radio on, deep in thought. This was the start of the Summer vacation and she hoped this could be an opportunity to turn a new leaf with him. He had been increasingly down in himself the entire school year and had become more defiant and withdrawn, rejecting her every bid at the care and affection she felt he needed. It didn’t seem like these thoughts were rolling around in her head for long before a robotic voice was instructing her to take a left turn. The turn was inconspicuous, obscured by shrubbery and she would have easily missed it if not for the direction. She slowed as her car wound over the gravel parking lot which hosted a modestly sized brick building. She pulled into a spot and, approaching the building with the slight trepidation would-be trespassers reserve for when they’re not entirely sure they’re in the right place, she gazed up at the sign above the door with the words Tender Care printed with in pastel letters, angled so as to appear to be on toy wooden blocks. She pushed her way through the front door, causing a bell to ring as she passed the threshold. If the building had been modest from the outside, it was comparatively cathedralesque internally, with seemingly every cubic inch of space planned and accounted for. She had expected a pharmacy, but before her ranged all manner of equipment and clothing. She was so focused on taking it all in, she almost didn’t catch the smiling woman in her peripheral vision. “Hello there. You’re a new face here if I’m not mistaken.” She was a kindly faced woman in her mid fifties with a name tag bearing the name Elizabeth, but she introduced herself as Liz, the shop’s sole proprietor. “Oh, hi! My son’s paediatrician gave me a prescription she said I should fill here.” she explained, digging through her purse for the document in question. “Dr. Richardson?” “How did you know?” “She sends a lot of customers our way, so you’re in good company.” As Abigail was led through the store, she had more time to appraise their other offerings. At first she had taken it for a generic medical supplies store, but on closer inspection a distinct theme was starting to emerge. There were cribs, high chairs, and strollers arranged for display on the floor. Most of the clothing on display had cartoonish appliqués and unusual fasteners. She would have taken it for a baby equipment store sooner, but was thrown off by how much bigger much of the equipment was here. “Excuse me, but what kind of store is this exactly?” enquired Abigail as they reached the till. “We cater to the families of children with a wide range of developmental and maturation delays, just like your little guy. So, this is a two week supply” Elizabeth began to explain, gesturing at two large plastic containers she had taken from a nearby shelf and placed on the counter. A green container bearing the word Nutriform in large text and picture of a smiling tot far younger than Oliver stood along side a second, nearly identical container, except that it was blue, and the label depicted a soundly sleeping child and it had the subtitle Sleeptite in smaller text below the main Nutriform brand. “It will all be explained on the insert, but you’re going to want to give him a scoop of the green one mixed into his bottles at meal times and the blue at bed time. You can mix half a scoop of each together for nap times, but that’s just a tip from me. He might be a little groggy afterwards.” “Oh, I think there’s been some misunderstanding.” chuckled Abigail. “My son is 13.” “Right, how silly of me.” conceded the shop attendant with a glint on her eye. “Still, I know Dr. Richardson well and the prescription is par for the course so no mistake there.” She bagged the two containers for Abigail as she began to ring up her purchase. “Now some good news today: These are fully covered on your insurance, and that will go for most everything here.” she explained, handing the brown paper bag to Abigail. “So no excuse to be a stranger if you find there’s anything else little Oliver needs.” she grinned leading her towards the door. They said their farewells and Abigail walked back out to the car, already trying to figure out how on Earth she was going to sell Oliver on this without a having a meltdown. By the time she had arrived home, she had resolved to transfer the contents of the containers to two inconspicuous containers. No sooner had she placed the bag on the kitchen worktop after making sure the coast was clear, than by the time she had completed the momentary returning home ritual of neatly storing her shoes, bag and keys in the foyer, a curious Oliver had ascended a step stool next to the worktop to interrogate the bags’ contents, hoping his mother’s presumed foray to the store might have yieled some chips or cookies. “Mom...” he asked uneasily. “What are these?” he said holding up the blue Nutriform container like a cross between something from show and tell and a discarded murder weapon. Abigail took a sharp intake of breath and bit her tongue, her plan instantly dashed. “No...” Oliver’s voice started to croak as the pieces fell into place in his head. “Sweetheart... The doctor said.” “No, no, no, NO, NO!” “Honey, please just listen.” but it was too late. “I’M NOT A FUCKING BABY!’ he screamed as he stormed past her. Abigail listened to the as-of-late all too familiar sound of heavy foot fall stamping up stairs, a brief pause, and the bang of a bedroom door being slammed to complete the sequence. She exhaled sharply and let her shoulders fall before following in pursuit, with softer foot steps. She gingerly opened the bedroom door and peaked in to see Oliver turned towards the wall, curled up in a fetal position, with his head in his hands, quietly weeping. The curtains were already drawn, darkening the room somewhat but the evening Summer sun streamed through the gaps. She took a seat on his bedside and placed a hand on his back. “It’s not fair, mom.” he said through muffled sobs. “I know sweetie. I know it’s not exactly what you were expecting. You know I only want to do what’s best for you right?” she ventured, and took his silence as a queue to continue. “I know it’s not easy, but, you know, part of growing up means making the decisions that are best for you in the long term, even if they’re not easy right now. This Summer could be a bit of a fresh start. A lot can change in a few months.” He turned around and edged towards her. “I’m sorry I shouted.” he said in a hoarse whisper. Tears were streaming down his face and his eyes were red from crying. “I know, sweetheart. It’s okay. I’m not mad. Hey, we have some coupons for that new pizza place you wanted to try. How about we order in tonight?” “Really?” he asked, perking up slightly. “My treat.’ she smiled at him. Approximately 45 minutes later Oliver descended the stairs, far more quietly than he had ascended them earlier. His mother sat on the couch with a welcoming smile. In addition to a steaming hot pizza and two large soft drinks, a glass sat of a pale white liquid, like milk with a slightly yellow tinge. “You can have it now or you can have the pizza first if you prefer.” explained Abigal. He settle into the couch beside her and picked up a slice of Pizza. Abigail had put one of his favourite Pixar movies from when he was younger on the TV, hoping in the back of her mind that the familiarity might help ease him into the change of routine. Oliver ate slowly, putting off the inevitable. “I think you should try some of your drink now.” Abigail coaxed gently when they were about halfway through the movie. With some hesitation picked up the glass and raised it to his lips. It tasted more or less like milk, which Oliver usually liked, except sweet, creamier, and just – to his surprise – better over all. Though he wasn’t about to let on so he made sure to drink slowly. About 15 minutes after he finished the glass, he was already flagging. His eyes felt heavy and he laid his head on his mother’s shoulder without even thinking about it. He closed his eyes briefly and when he opened them, the end credits of the movie were rolling. He turned to see his mother smiling warmly at him. “I think you’re about ready for the land of nod, little man.” she said softly. He was too tired to argue. She led him by the hand up to his room. He felt like he was in a losing battle for his consciousness as he changed into his pyjamas and slumped into bed. The last thing he remembered was the silhouette of his mother tucking him in before he passed out just before 8:30 p.m. with the sun still firmly in the sky, hours before his usual bedtime, if he even had one. Abigail stared at her son sleeping soundly. She hadn’t expected the sleep aid to be so effective. She hoped that, now that they were over the initial hump, the journey might be smoother from here on out. She kissed him on the cheek and closed the door gently behind her. “Rise and shine sleepyhead, it’s almost 10:00 a.m.” Abigail half-sang as she entered Oliver’s room. He rolled out of bed as he came to. His initial feeling of being extremely well rested gave way to a far less pleasant feeling of cold clamminess all over. He pulled his sheets away to see that, along with most of his bedding. his pyjamas were soaked from below his knees almost up to his chest.
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Another short story just out of a situation I thought of! None of the stories I write re connected, just their own little things. Enjoy! -------------------- "So that's how the Russian conter-attack of the German invasion turned the tide on the Second World War..." the old, sniffly University lecturer slowly said as he addressed the tired and uninterested group of university students. Sat two rows from the back of the room, Max tried his absolute hardest to keep is eyes open in as he rested his head on his left hand propped up by his elbow on the table. He kept glancing at the clock waiting for it to reach eleven o'clock so he could finally leave and head back to his dorm. "I think that wraps up todays lecture everyone, you are dismissed" the lecturer announced as he began to pack up his bag. 'Thank god' Max said to himself as he sprung to attention. He grabbed his bag from underneath the table as the students began to flow out of the back doors. As he pulled his bag onto his back he saw his water bottle fall out of the side pocket and land just infront of his feet, and without thinking he bent over to pick it up and put it back in his bag. As Max left he thought about what he could do to occupy the rest of his day. He didn't have any more lectures or social plans for the rest of the day, and at first he thought about doing the responsible thing and going to the library to study but instead he was leaning towards going back to his dorm and just having a lazy day. Max strolled across the university campus but he heard some quick steps behind him that caught his attention. Before he knew it he felt a tap on his shoulder. "Hey man, I was just in the history lecture. You dropped this!" a blonde haired student said as he held out an iPhone charger. Max instantly recognised it and realised it must've fallen out his bag with his water bottle. "Ah thank you, must've fallen out of my bag" Max replied as he took the charger and stuck it back in his bag. "That was such a boring lecture. I'm way behind on my second module work and I don't mean to encroach on you but I really could do with brainstorming ideas with someone. I'm Ross by the way" he said. "Oh, well I've not got anything else on today so I could help for a bit I guess. I'm Max" Max responded as they shook hands. "Thanks man I really appreciate it! There's a pub just down the road if you wanted to set up in there?" Ross suggested. "The King Charles? Yeah sounds good that's a nice pub!" Max replied happily. Max and Ross both made their to the pub and the walk was slightly awkward although they soon realised they were in the same university halls. It was a short walk and soon they were sat in a quiet corner of the pub with a beer each and they began working on the second module Ross mentioned. Max thought to himself how nice Ross seemed and how similar they were and he could very easily see them becoming good friends. "Hey Max thanks for doing this I really appreciate the help. Can I ask you something though?" Ross said as he finished the last sip of his beer. "Yeah go for it what is it?" Max replied. "Oh okay well i'm just going to say it. Are you wearing a Goodnite?" Ross said nervously. Max went dizzy at the question, and totally mortified. His mind left his body as he realised Ross must've seen the top of his black Goodnite over the waistband of his baggy navy joggers as he bent over to pick up his water bottle in the lecture. "Hey hey hey Max it's okay don't panic. I won't tell anyone" Ross said as he put his hand on Max's back to help him stay calm. Admittedly it did help and max tentatively opened his mouth. "Umm, oh, so... you know what they look like?" Max asked tentively. "Yeah. To let you in on a secret" Ross said as he leaned into Max. "I like to wear them too, I'm an ABDL". Max was shocked. What were the chances? a fellow university student staying in the same halls as him who he got along with also being an ABDL. He was still nervous, but also counted himself lucky and he had to admit he found it exciting. Max thought about what he was going to say next, not wanting to fully reveal his hand but he was also curious. "Oh. So am I. I sometimes like to wear Goodnites under my clothes" Max admitted. "So... do you wear them as well?". "I have done in the past but they are a bit tight on me. I usually wear either ABU or Cuddlz." Ross explained. Max was aware of those brands but had never plucked up the courage to buy them. He realised he was in the presence of a more experienced ABDL than him. "I've never tried those!" Max said. "Would you like to? You know what I think I've got a few back in my dorm?" Ross asked. Max was hesitant about going back to someone else's dorm but at the same time what other chance would he get to meet another ABDL? He was a shy person and could never bring himself to go on websites like Fetlife. "Yeah go on then. You promise you won't tell anyone though?" Max asked. "Your secret is safe with me man, promise. Shall we head back to the halls?" Ross suggested. Max grabbed his pint and finished off his beer. "Let's go" he said. They both packed up their bags and headed straight back to the halls they both had dorms in. The walk was near on silent, with both being clerly nervous by what was about to happen but both were also secretly excited. It was a 15 minute walk back to the halls and soon enough they had arrived. As they entered the lift Ross pressed the button to take them to the second floor, two floors below Max's dorm. As they left the lift Max's nerves began to increase while Ross made a beeline for his dorm. "Here we are. Don't know about you but I'm one of the lucky ones that got an en-suite" Ross said as he unlocked the door. "Oh so have I, wouldn't have moved into halls without one!" Max replied. Truth be told he wanted an en-suite so dealing with Goodnite changes was easier. Max stepped into the dorm to see an impeccably tidy room complete with a television, games console and a huge Mac desktop computer. He couldn't believe the situation he was in, he'd met another ABDL on the off chance - a taller, cool and fashionable fellow student with a blonde mullet. He was a shy scrawny boy with a brown mop haircut and baggy clothes from Primark. "Cool, so you want to do this?" Ross said as he opened his wardrobe. "Do what?" Max panicked. "Oh you mean the nappies. Yeah I do if that's okay". "Of course! Here we are" Ross replied as he retrieved two ABU Little Kings nappies from his wardrobe. Max had never seen one before and was so excited to strap into one. "But before we get padded up, can I see your Goodnite?" Ross asked. Max's face went red. "Ummm yeah sure, of courrse yeah" he said nervously. Max then took off his bag and placed it on the floor next to the door and then looked down and began pulling down his joggers. After a few seconds the waistband met the top of his knees and he held them in place revealing his dry Goodnite to a complete stranger he met only a few hours ago. "Cool man they almost look like pants! Is it wet?" Ross asked as he walked over and inspected the Goodnite further. "Oh no it isn't it's dry" Max responded. "Fairs. So, shall I go into the bathroom and get this on?" Ross said as he held up one of the nappies. "Go for it" Max said. Ross nodded and chucked the other nappy at Max as he went into the bathroom and he caught it, simultaneously dropping his joggers to his ankles. This was the first time he'd felt an ABDL nappy in his hands and it felt amazing. For at least a minute he just held it and stared at it until he was disturbed by Ross exiting the bathroom. Max's attention was immediately caught by Ross' midriff, and he saw his blonde haired legs complete with a nappy. He looked incredible and it immediately made Max jealous. "What do you think?" Ross asked? "Yeah cool" max said awkwardly. "So, you want to get that on too? I know you said you've not worn one before so will you be okay putting it on yourself?" Ross asked helpfully. "Oh yeah I'll be fine" Max said as he lifted his feet out of his joggers and stepped into the bathroom and closed the door. Max then puffed out the nappy and opened it up, amazed by it's size. He then carefully stepped out of the Goodnite and then paused for a second to think about how he'd got to this point. He was in another students dorm room about to put on a nappy. No going back now was his first thought. Max lied down on the floor and sat on the open nappy before expertly taping it up over his penis. Even though he'd never worn one before he'd seen plenty of videos of other people putting them on and therefore was basically a pro. Once the nappy was on he slowly stood up and marvelled about how thick and soft it was. He looked in the mirror and saw himself in a grey hoodie and nothing but an adult nappy which basically looked like pampers. He was in dreamland. He paused for a second before opening the door and facing his new friend. He re-entered the room to see Ross turning on his Playstation and holding two controllers. "Hey looking good man! How does it feel?" Ross asked. "It feels great, it's so thick" Max said as he felt the top of the nappy and gave it a good look. "That's the best thing about them. They hold so much too that's why!" Ross explained. "How about a couple of games of FIFA? Do you like football?. "Sounds great I love FIFA" Max replied as he grabbed one of the controllers and they both sat on Ross' bed facing the TV. After one or two games of FIFA both Max and Ross opened up to eachother getting to know their backgrounds and interests, before eventually getting onto their fetishes. Ross explained that he was a bedwetter as a teenager and developed a love for nappies from wearing Goodnites and loving how they feel. He was more adventurous than Max and had been into wearing ABDL nappies for a few years. Max told him he'd always loved the idea of wearing nappies but had only started indulging in it since the start of university. After the end of the third game he saw Ross fidgeting around slightly and switched position from having his feet planted on the floor to being cross-legged on the bed. “You okay?” Max asked inquisitively. “Yeah I’m good, I just kinda need to pee” Ross replied as he touched the front of his nappy. “Do you mind if I go now?”. “Umm yeah okay, I guess you mean in your nappy?” Max asked despite knowing the answer. “Yep, do you want to watch?” Ross said. “Okay that’ll be fun” Max said. He then turned his position to face Ross and sat on the back of his legs in a kneeling position so he could clearly see Ross’ nappied crotch. “Here we go, usually takes me a few seconds” Ross replied as he lifted his bum slightly and put his arms straight so his hands were on the bed. Max watched keenly as he heard a feint hissing sound and a lightly pale yellow patch formed right on Ross’ crotch. “Ahhhhhh” Ross whispered. Some time passed and the yellow patch grew bigger until it was covering most of the front of Ross’ nappy. Max was astonished by what he had seen. He’d seen people wet nappies in videos online hundreds of times but never in the flesh. “Cool” Max said as he looked at Ross. “That feels so much better, it’s so warm! Do you want to feel?” Ross asked. After a few seconds thought Max nodded and then slowly moved his right hand downwards until it cupped Ross’ crotch. He instantly felt heat and could smell a very feint whiff of urine. “You are right it is warm!” Max said. “You know what, I think I need to pee too, can I go as well?”. “Sure man! Why don’t you stand up and do it” Ross suggested. “Okay” Max said as he got off the bed and stood directly infront of Ross and separated his legs apart. “Whenever you are ready, let the floodgates open!” Ross said as he sat up. Max shut his eyes and tried to focus on peeing. He was nervous doing it infront of someone for the first time and admittedly it was impeding his ability to let go. However after about 30 seconds he felt a small dribble soak into his nappy. “Ah it’s coming” Max said quietly. The dribble soon turned into a flood as his nappy became warm and it soaked between his legs. It was a euphoric feeling and somewhat different to wetting a Goodnite. It didn’t cling to him as much and he was surprised by how quickly it dried on his skin. “Good work man you are soaking it!” Ross encouraged. Soon the well was dry and Max’s nappy was wet. He let out one final sigh and opened his eyes. As he opened them he could see Ross reaching towards his nappy and prodding the front. “That’s so wet, you are a pro!” Ross cheered. “Right couple more games of FIFA? I’ve got all day!”. “Sure let’s do it!” Max said as he sat back down on the bed and picked up the controller. They continued to go about playing like nothing had happened. Max could feel his nappy was bulkier but he loved the feeling. It was so nice to sit in a warm nappy. As one of their games entered stoppage time, Max was concentrating on seeing out a win when suddenly the competitive silence was broken by a loud fart. It didn’t sound like a normal fart, but one that was muffled slightly by a nappy. The smell instantly hit him. “Eww Ross did you just fart? Are you trying to put me off?” Max teased. “Haha sorry better out than in I always say!” Ross replied as he lifted his left cheek off the bed and let out a second, more high pitched fart. “Stop it they stink!” Max laughed. “Sorry man” Ross said as he paused the game, put one hand left the controller and rested on his stomach. “Oh god my tummy is aching a bit, I think I need to go”. “Oh what but we’re nearly at the end of the game?” Max said. “I don’t mean I have to go, I mean I have to go” Ross said cryptically as he pointed down to his nappy. “Oh right, got to be honest Ross I’ve never done that before. Do you usually go number two in your nappies as well?” Max asked. “Oh of course, it feels so nice!” Ross explained. “But it’s a big step I guess for someone who’s never done it before. But I really need to poo do you mind if I do it right here? I can take the nappy off and go to the toilet if it makes you uncomfortable?”. Max pondered. He’d never tried it but he was kind of intrigued, but it would be pretty weird to watch someone mess themselves right infront of him. He carefully considered. “It’s okay you can do it if you want” Max confirmed. “Oh great, because I feel like I’m about to explode! You can watch if you want” Ross said as he shifted position once more and got on all fours on his bed, with his bum facing the TV. Max sat down beside him and leaned slightly so he could catch a glimpse of what was about to happen. Max heard a few quiet grunts from Ross and quickly set eyes on the back of his nappy. After a few seconds he saw movement at the back of the nappy as it ballooned slightly with a crackling sound before it fell slightly into the padding. “Ahhh that’s better” Ross said as he let out a very quiet fart signalling the end of his bowel movement. The smell of his poo immediately assaulted Max’s nostrils. “Sorry man but it’s a bit of a smelly one, must’ve been that Chinese I had last night!”. “Phew, yeah it’s okay don’t worry about it. How does it feel?” Max asked as he scrunched his nose. “It feels good. It’s like having a warm lump of mud on your bum” Ross said as one of his hands reached behind him and felt the load. “Your nappy is holding a lot!” Max said as he inspected further. “These nappies can take much more believe me!” Ross explained. “This is going to be a big clean up operation though it already feels super messy”. “Damn that must be the hardest thing, I probably should get going it’s getting on and I don’t want to intrude on your cleanup” Max explained as he looked at his watch. “Sure man that’s sound. Do you want to change your nappy here?” Ross asked as he slowly stood up, no doubt squishing his mess further. “You know what I’ll do it back at my dorm, I’ve got supplies” Max said. “Cool. You know what take these” Ross said as he waddled over to his wardrobe and handed Max a few different ABDL nappies. “Oh no these are expensive please” Max rejected. “I insist, also give me your phone and I’ll stick my number in. If you want to do this again just drop me a text” Ross said as he took Max’s phone from his hand and typed his number in as a new contact. “Yeah definitely. I’m just going to put my joggers back on and I’ll be out of your hair” Max said as he walked over to his bag and slid his joggers back up his legs. He glanced in the mirror next to him and could see his big wet nappy made his bum look very flat and big. “Don’t worry no one will be looking, unless they are one of us of course” Ross winked. “It’s only a short journey anyway” Max explained. “Damn it really does stink in here man, how do you deal with that?”. “It’s nothing Febreeze can’t fix!” Ross joked. They both laughed. “Good one! Right I’ll see you around I guess” Max said as they both shared a dap and Ross opened the door for him. “Yeah definitely see you later Max!” Ross waved. Ross watched Max walk down the corridor with a slight waddle. Max smiled as he let out another spurt of wee into his nappy while walking.
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I posted several chapters of this story a couple of years ago, but I got discouraged from writing it after some rude reviews. I know that this isn’t the “typical” abdl story, and I don’t expect everyone to like it. All I expect is for people not to be rude because this isn’t the kind of story they like. Some of it has been changed, as well as a couple of minor characters’ names and ages. I’ve already spruced up/made minor changes to several existing chapters, so I’ll update fairly regularly until I hit new chapters. Sharon came in from work one Thursday afternoon in October and left the bags in her hands by the door before going to check on her seventeen-year-old foster son. Ryan had been sick for most of the week, and she hoped he was feeling a little better today. She found him lying on the couch, curled up under his favorite blanket and watching TV. “Hi, honey, how are you feeling?” Ryan peered up at her, his blue eyes glassy under his blonde bangs. “A little better.” Sharon sat on the edge of the couch and held her hand to his forehead. “You’re still a little hot. How’s your throat?” “Still hurts.” Sharon leaned down and kissed his forehead. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. You’ll need to stay home again tomorrow, but I’ll stay home with you, okay?” She’d stayed home with him for most of the week, but he’d seemed a little better this morning, and she’d had some things she needed to take care of from her office today, so she’d gone back to work. Sharon took a deep breath. “Honey, I’m not quite sure how to tell you this, but we missed out on an important piece of news this week.” Ryan shrugged disinterestedly. “What?” Sharon brushed his bangs back from his face. “A law was passed this week that makes it illegal for children under eighteen to be potty-trained.” Ryan wrinkled his nose, but he didn’t quite understand what that had to do with him. Surely, that applied to kids not potty-trained yet, not to him. “So? I’m already potty-trained, and I’m almost eighteen, anyway.” “I know, but it doesn’t matter. You’ll have to wear diapers until your birthday. The ‘potty-trained’ part doesn’t really matter, either, the law basically just says that anyone under 18 has to wear diapers. We might as well go ahead and get this over with.” Sharon got the bags she’d left beside the door and opened a package of diapers. “Okay, well, uh, it’s only for a few months, anyway. I’ll just use the diapers if I really have to and change myself right after.” Sharon shook her head. “It’s not that simple. You can’t change your own diapers, I’ll have to change them for you.” “What?! Sharon, are you sure about this?” Sharon nodded. “They think kids, teenagers especially, having to be so dependent upon their parents will fix behavioral issues or something.” “Please, no,” Ryan pleaded. He felt too sick to fight her too much on this, and he knew Sharon would never lie about it. He’d also known this was a possibility for a while, he just never thought the law would pass. He hadn’t read about the specifics, because he never thought it would be an issue for him. “Wait, are you going to send me away? I know you don’t want to change my diapers.” “Absolutely not! But, if we don’t go along with this, then you could be taken away from me.” Ryan watched her with dread, but he knew there was no way out of it. “Hold on, let me go pee really quick.” He’d been about to go to the bathroom when he heard Sharon come in, but he’d decided to wait and talk to her first. “No, honey, we need to go ahead and do this. Debra could stop by at any time, especially with this new law, and we’ll need proof that we’re following it. I’m surprised she hasn’t come by already.” That was enough for Ryan not to struggle as Sharon gently pulled his pajama pants and boxers down. He’d do anything to stay with Sharon. He closed his eyes as he felt cold air hit his exposed private areas, but Sharon was quick and matter-of-fact about taping a diaper on him like it was no big deal. She patted his leg once his pajama pants were back up. “Okay, honey, if you need to pee-pee, just go ahead and go.” “Pee-pee?” Sharon gave him a wry smile. “Sorry, honey, I guess this diaper talk has me in potty-training mode. And it just sounds nicer.” Ryan was starting to get uncomfortable, but even with the soft padding pressed against him, he felt too much like he was going to wet his pants if he started peeing. Sharon went to the kitchen to start dinner and give him some privacy, but he still couldn’t make himself go. He crossed his legs to ease the pressure, and he wished he could just let it out. He didn’t want to pee, but he didn’t want to keep holding it and be uncomfortable, either. Sharon peeked into the living room. “Ryan, are you wet?” “Not yet,” he mumbled, gasping as he felt a little try to come out. He instinctively grabbed his crotch and squeezed his legs together harder, but it didn’t do much good through the thick padding. “Honey, please, just go ahead and pee-pee. I don’t think you can hold it for four months.” The intense wave of urgency temporarily disappeared, but it came back with a vengeance. After a few involuntary spurts, a slow stream he couldn’t hold back started dribbling into his diaper. Ryan shuddered as he felt his bladder completely give up for the first time since he was eight. Feeling his pee pour out even as he actively clenched and tried to hold it back felt just as helpless now as it had the last time he’d held his bladder past capacity. At least his clothes weren’t getting soaked like last time. As a child, his bladder had been small and a little weak for his age, and he’d had occasional accidents longer than most kids, both at night and during the day. It had gotten better as he got older, but he still had to be more mindful of using the toilet before getting in the car or between classes in case a teacher didn’t allow him to leave to use the bathroom than most kids his age. He closed his eyes as the slow stream became a gushing torrent and soaked his diaper with a low hiss. His hand was still clutching his padded crotch, trying to hold it in, and he could feel his diaper grow warm against his hand through his pajama pants. It was weird to lose control like this without wetting his pants. The last time this happened, he was in the second grade. His class was on the way back from a field trip, and he’d forgotten to use the bathroom before they got on the bus. He was too shy to tell his teacher he had to go until it was an emergency, and the bus driver hadn’t been able to stop somewhere before he couldn’t hold it anymore and soaked his shorts. He’d had a few close calls and dribbles into his underwear since then, but it hadn’t been a huge problem in years. After raising two sons and a daughter of her own, Sharon could tell exactly when he lost control. She let him finish before going to check his diaper. “Hmm, I don’t think you need to be changed right away. Are you uncomfortable?” Ryan shook his head. The soft, warm padding between his legs actually felt pretty good. “All right. If it gets uncomfortable before you wet again and you want me to go ahead and change you, just tell me. I don’t mind.” “Thanks, Sharon.” After dinner, they watched TV on the couch together. Ryan folded his arms over his stomach as the discomfort in his stomach grew. He usually had to poop between dinner time and bedtime, and he was dreading this even more than pee. Sharon knew what the problem was when his discomfort became apparent, so she reassuringly patted his shoulder and left the room. The kid pooped like clockwork. Ryan closed his eyes as he pushed warm mush into his diaper. His bladder released a little bit of pee as he filled his diaper, and he sighed when he was finished. His stomach felt better, but the only way to get the disgusting diaper off of him was for Sharon to change him. He was relieved when she came back in without him having to call for her. “You all done?” Ryan nodded, wishing the couch would open up and swallow him whole. “All right, I’ll go ahead and change you. Do you need to pee-pee again first?” “I already did,” Ryan mumbled, covering his face with his hands as he lay on the floor. Sharon laid out a changing mat and got a clean diaper and a box of wet wipes, then quickly cleaned him up. He winced as she maneuvered his penis with the wet wipe to make sure she hadn’t missed anything. He sighed with relief when she finally taped his dirty diaper closed, threw it away, and washed her hands before coming back and pulling his pajama pants back up. She tucked his blanket around his shoulders and kissed his forehead once he was back on the couch. “Hmm, I may need to take you back to the doctor tomorrow. If your fever isn’t a little lower in the morning, I’m making an appointment for you.” Ryan nodded and willingly leaned into her open arms. He loved how Sharon comforted him when he wasn’t feeling well, although it had taken a while to get to that point with her after he’d been taken away from his abusive parents. The soft, dry padding between his legs, his warm pajamas, and Sharon’s familiar smell made him feel cozy and cared for. Sharon absently ran her fingers through his hair as they watched TV, and it was barely 9:30 when his eyes were starting to close. “You ready for bed?” Sharon asked, noticing Ryan’s eyes getting heavy. “Yeah. I slept all day, but...” “Being sick will do that to you. Go on to bed, and I’ll bring your medicine upstairs. Try to wet your diaper so I can change you. I’d rather you be able to keep your diaper dry until morning and not have to wake up needing to go during the night.” Ryan nodded and headed for the stairs. Once he was curled up in bed, he tried to pee in his diaper. His sore throat had caused him to drink a lot that day, so it wasn’t hard to let a small stream out. Sharon came in a couple of minutes later with his medicine and a glass of water. “Oh, good, you were able to go,” she noted as she checked his diaper. Once he was changed and had taken his medicine, she tucked him in and felt his forehead. “I know your medicine might upset your stomach, so come wake me up if you need to be changed during the night, or if you start feeling worse.” She brushed his bangs back and kissed his forehead. “Goodnight, honey. Feel better.” “Thanks, Sharon.” Ryan rolled over, knowing she’d scratch his back until he fell asleep, like she always did when he was sick. When Ryan woke up the next morning, a slightly urgent need to pee drew him out of bed. In his drowsy state, he forgot that he was wearing a diaper and was confused to find his bathroom door locked. His brain registered the padding between his legs then, and he remembered that he wasn’t allowed to use the toilet. Sharon had probably locked his bathroom door as a reminder. He wanted to go back to sleep, and he was too sleepy to care about peeing in his diaper, so he willingly released his bladder and wet himself. The wet warmth that slowly encased his crotch felt good, and he easily went back to sleep. When Ryan woke up again, he was thirsty, so he got out of bed and went downstairs. Sharon was on a conference call in the kitchen and standing at the counter with papers spread in front of her. Ryan got a glass of juice and started for the living room, but she waved him over to her. He was feeling better than the day before, but he still felt sick. Sharon placed her hand under his chin and studied him before feeling his forehead. “Want eggs for breakfast?” She asked, covering the mouthpiece of the phone with her hand. Ryan nodded, wincing as Sharon gently squeezed his diapered crotch. He supposed he was just going to have to get used to diaper checks. “Oh, good, you’re already wet. I’m almost done, and I’ll bring you some breakfast and your medicine in a few minutes.” Ryan took his juice to the living room and drank just enough to soothe his throat before stretching out on the couch. Even though his diaper was already wet, he knew he wasn’t going to be as willing to wet it again as he’d been when he just wanted to go back to sleep earlier that morning. Sharon came in a few minutes later with breakfast for him, his medicine, and the thermometer. She pressed the back of her hand to his forehead and slipped the thermometer into his mouth. “You’re still a little feverish, but not as hot as yesterday...yep, your fever went down a little bit,” she confirmed after checking the thermometer. “Do you feel better? I’ll still take you back to the doctor if you don’t.” “Yeah, my throat’s still sore, but it’s better than yesterday. It’s not bad.” “All right...Drink a little more juice.” Ryan looked warily at his glass and shook his head. “Honey, don’t worry about how often you need to be changed. Drink what you need to, I don’t want you to get dehydrated. The faster you get used to me changing you, the easier it will be. Speaking of which, do you want me to change you now, or wait until you wet again? I’ll go ahead and change you if you feel gross.” “I can wait. It feels okay.” “Okay. I have to do a few things for work, but it won’t take long. I’ll come watch a movie with you when I’m finished. If you pee-pee again before I come back, come tell me. You don’t need to stay in such a wet diaper for too long...Wow, I still can’t believe I’m saying sentences like that.” Ryan rolled his eyes. “How did this happen? I didn’t think that stupid law had a chance to pass.” “I heard this morning that a lobbyist for one of the big diaper companies got their hands on some study that the legislature couldn’t ignore. Like anyone thinks those companies are worried about kids. They just wanted to find a way to expand their market. Which they did. Big-time.” “This sucks.” “I know it does. I would hate it if I were you, too. I know you can’t help but be embarrassed, but try not to be. I’ll make this as easy for you as I can.” “Thanks, Sharon.” “You’re welcome.” Sharon kissed his forehead. “Call for me if you need me.” Ryan zoned out in front of the TV for a couple of hours, and next thing he knew, Sharon was bringing him a bowl of soup for lunch. “This is the last of the batch I made on Tuesday. I’ll cook whatever you want tonight if you have more of an appetite.” “Ooh, that pasta with the chicken and mushrooms?” “I knew you’d say that. You got it.” Sharon checked his diaper. “You haven’t pee-peed again?” She asked in surprise. She didn’t know if he had any kind of bladder issues, but she’d noticed for a while that he seemed to have to go more often and had more “have to go soon or this could be bad” moments than her own kids had as teenagers. Ryan grimaced as he shifted on the couch. He’d tried not to drink too much, but his annoying sore throat had had other plans for him. His annoyingly small bladder had been making its fullness known for a while, now, and he was reaching his breaking point. “Not yet, but, uh...” “You have to go, huh?” “Yeah,” Ryan muttered through gritted teeth. He knew he was going to start peeing before long, whether he wanted to or not, but he couldn’t make himself let go. His bladder was pulsing painfully by now, and he squeezed his legs together and held himself, desperately trying to keep it in. He had to go too badly to care about the fact that he was shamelessly grabbing his crotch in front of Sharon. Wetting his diaper had been one thing early that morning when he was tired and just wanted to go back to sleep, but peeing himself while he was wide awake was just as difficult as it had been the evening before. His body wasn’t any more willing to contradict his potty-training than his mind was, and it was intent on holding his bladder until it gave out on its own. “Sharon, I can’t do it,” Ryan whined. “It hurts, and I know I can’t hold it much longer, but I can’t make myself go.” Sharon gave him a sympathetic look, her heart breaking for him. “I guess it is hard to go when you feel like you’ll wet your pants, which your body has been trained not to do for a long time now.” Sharon placed their bowls of soup on the coffee table and pulled his hands away from his crotch. The unexpected movement made Ryan jump, and he gasped as he felt his hold on his bladder loosen. He gave up and relaxed as he flooded his diaper, his cheeks flushing as an audible hiss came from his crotch. Once his stream trickled off, he pushed a little to make sure he was completely empty. The longer he could go between diaper changes, the better. “All right, honey, I think it’s safe to say you’re officially soaked. Let’s get you changed.” Ryan moved to the floor and lay down, his face flaming as Sharon placed the changing mat under him, pulled down his pajama pants, and untaped his diaper. She pulled a basket out from under the coffee table and got a clean diaper and a pack of wet wipes. Ryan winced as she moved a cold wipe across his crotch. “Why are you using those when I’m just wet?” He whined. “You’ve been in a wet diaper since early this morning. This will just make you feel more fresh and help prevent a diaper rash.” By the time Ryan was in a clean diaper and had his pajama pants back on, he did have to admit that he felt better than he would have if Sharon didn’t wipe him down. After lunch, he was getting drowsy, and he was barely aware of Sharon tucking his blanket around his shoulders and kissing his forehead as he drifted off to sleep. When Ryan woke up three hours later, he already had a nagging tingle in his bladder, no doubt due to Sharon making him finish his juice and then drink a little more while they were eating lunch. It would still be a while before he had to go really badly, but he’d probably be heading to the bathroom soon if he didn’t have to wear diapers. Sharon was siting in a chair with her computer in her lap and noticed when he started stirring. “Hey, how are you feeling?” “Better,” Ryan answered honestly. His throat was a little less sore, and he didn’t feel quite as achy. “You do look a little better,” Sharon agreed. She closed her laptop and crouched beside Ryan on the couch with her hand on his forehead. “Your temperature went down a good bit, I think you’re on the mend. Are you wet?” She asked as she moved her hand from his forehead to his diapered crotch. “Sharon. I haven’t peed myself while I was sleeping, especially for just a nap, since I was...uh, in years,” Ryan said, too embarrassed to admit how long he’d wet the bed as a kid. “Oh, I guess you’re right.” Sharon patted his shoulder. “Finish your juice. I’m going to start dinner.” Once Sharon was gone, Ryan took advantage of his drowsiness and tried to release his bladder into his diaper. His fuzzy mind and the memory of how good it had felt for the padding to slowly warm up against his crotch that morning when he didn’t wait until he couldn’t hold it anymore weakened his defenses. The fact that he’d inevitably have to do it anyway and the desire not to let himself get so full that it hurt until he endured the panic and discomfort of losing control pushed him over the edge, and he closed his eyes as he relaxed and pushed a slow and steady stream into his diaper. The wet warmth between his legs felt embarrassingly nice, but he might as well enjoy it. Now that Ryan was feeling a little better and realized he’d have to go back to school next week, he had some questions. He went into the kitchen and sat in a bar stool as Sharon prepared dinner. “So, uh, what about school next week? Like, what happens when I have to be changed?” He could probably stop drinking coffee and manage to only pee once or twice at school, but there was no way he could last until Sharon came home from work on the days she went to her office. Going to her office after school to be changed sounded embarrassing, too. “I asked about that when I called this morning to tell them you’d be absent again. The school nurse will change students when they need it, but I thought you might want to finish school online. I can work from home most of the time and be here to change you. I went to the high school and filled out the forms and got the material for it while you were napping so you can start on Monday, but I can take them back if you want to keep going to school. It’s your decision, I just didn’t think you’d be too happy about the nurse changing you.” “Oh, my god, that would be awesome. Thanks.” Sharon finished up her dinner preparations and untied her apron. “You can still see your friends whenever you want to, and they’re still welcome here any time.” “Sharon. Changing my diapers is bad enough. You don’t want to have to change theirs, too.” “Honey, I’d rather change their diapers than discourage you from seeing your friends. It’ll be fine.” After dinner, Sharon and Ryan watched a movie together in the living room. Ryan lay down in Sharon’s lap, sighing contentedly when she started running her fingers through his hair. He felt a little old for this, but he’d missed out on the childhood love and cuddling with his abusive parents. He’d been sick a couple of times since he started living with Sharon over two years ago, and it had been a little awkward at first, but he was now used to her nurturing gestures when he wasn’t feeling well and enjoyed it. After a while, he grimaced as his stomach started to cramp. It was going to take longer to get used to doing this than peeing in his diaper, no question. Peeing at least felt good. There was nothing enjoyable about this. “Um, Sharon?” He asked shyly. “Hm?....Oh. I’ll go finish cleaning the kitchen.” Sharon knew what the problem was, so she gave him some privacy. Ryan crouched in front of the couch in what Sharon called the “potty stance.” She’d never said that in reference to him, obviously, but she had a newly-potty-trained three-year-old grandson that had an aversion to pooping in the toilet. He’d only recently started doing that in the toilet sometimes, but he still had a tendency to go in his pants if someone didn’t have an eagle eye on him. Ryan knew that Anne-Marie, Sharon’s daughter, and her husband had to be frustrated with the law passing. They’d finally gotten the kid mostly potty-trained, and now had to put him back in diapers. Like Sharon, they’d just thought the law wouldn’t pass. Sharon had kept her grandson one Saturday afternoon a couple of weeks after he was out of diapers, and Ryan had taken him outside for a while. He knew nothing about potty cues in children and was confused when William ventured away from him and crouched down for a couple of minutes. He didn’t realize what had happened until William stood up and had a small wet spot at his crotch. He wasn’t wet enough for a full-blown wetting accident, and he was walking with the obvious discomfort of having a load in his pants, so Ryan figured he’d pooped in his pants and accidentally let out a little pee in the process. He didn’t know how Sharon was going to react to a potty accident. Ryan’s own parents had yelled and beaten him when he had accidents, of course, and he knew Sharon wouldn’t hurt the kid, but he didn’t want her to get angry with him, either. He’d tried to sneak William into the house so he could change him without Sharon noticing, but she’d met them at the door with wet wipes, clean underwear, and pants in her hands, explaining that she’d spotted the “potty stance” from the kitchen window. She just cleaned him up and helped him change, then gently reminded him that he was supposed to tell her or Ryan when he had to go potty. As Ryan assumed a similar stance he’d seen with William and filled his own diaper, he realized that the kid was on to something. It was a faster and more complete-feeling process when he was squatting. He’d peed a little a couple of times after wetting himself after his nap, and he let out a little more as he pooped. He’d realized that it was easier to make himself pee a little at a time before it got urgent, and it was getting easier to do it each time. Eating a full meal after a few days of eating mostly soup, his stomach was a little upset, and it took longer than usual. His appetite had returned with a vengeance, and he’d had three helpings of dinner. He lowered his pajama pants and watched his diaper to make sure it didn’t start leaking. When he was finally finished, he stood up to indicate that he was done. He couldn’t bring himself to sit down in his mushy mess, and doing so might cause him to leak. His stomach still felt a little unsettled, but he wasn’t able to go anymore at the moment. Sharon came in a couple of minutes later and got a clean diaper and pack of wet wipes. She realized she hadn’t checked his diaper for wetness in a few hours, so she gently squeezed the padding between his legs as he lay down on the floor. “Oh, Ryan, you’re pretty wet. I haven’t thought to check you. You could’ve told me if you were uncomfortable, I would’ve changed you sooner.” Ryan shrugged. “It wasn’t bad. I, uh, just went, too, so it wasn’t that wet the whole time.” He gritted his teeth and felt his cheeks flush as Sharon untaped his diaper and wiped him down. “Does your stomach hurt?” Sharon asked as she cleaned him up. Some of it was obviously a little sticky, as she’d been wiping the same spot for several moments with increasing pressure, and she obviously noticed that he’d pooped a lot more than the night before. “Not really, I think I just ate a little too much dinner.” “Okay. I can give you something to settle your stomach if I need to.” Ryan shook his head. “I think I’m okay.” Sharon finally got him cleaned up and taped a clean diaper on him. “Be right back.” Ryan stood up and tried to take his soiled diaper from her. “I can at least throw my own diapers away.” “Don’t worry about it, honey. This is the easy part.” Sharon took his diaper to the large garbage can in the garage and washed her hands before settling back on the couch with him. Later that night, Sharon gave Ryan his medicine and tucked him into bed. She’d been trying to compensate for the nurturing he had missed out on as a child, and she always tucked him in and stayed with him until he fell asleep when he was sick. She kissed his forehead and straightened his covers over his shoulders. “I love you, honey. If your stomach is still upset and you need to be changed during the night, please come wake me. I don’t want you to have to stay in a messy diaper longer than you have to.” “Mm-hmm.” Ryan hoped that wouldn’t be a problem, but he was too sleepy to worry about it now. It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep, but he woke up a few hours later with a cramping stomach. He stumbled out of bed and walked halfway to his bathroom before remembering he was wearing a diaper and had to use it. There was no way he could hold it until the next morning, or even for a couple more minutes, and he was already squirting into his diaper before he had time to crouch beside his bed. The discomfort in his stomach slowly alleviated as it emptied into his diaper, and he felt the front of his diaper grow warm as he started to pee. He realized he was going to have to wake Sharon up to change him, whether he wanted to or not. His diaper had to be close to overflowing, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep with the mess caking against him. He begrudgingly waddled downstairs and into Sharon’s room. He stood over her sleeping form for a couple of minutes before he had the courage to wake her. “Hey, Sharon,” he whispered, softly shaking her shoulder. “Sharon!” “Hmm?” Sharon sat up and rubbed her eyes. “What’s the matter? Are you feeling bad again?...Oh, I see.” The stench hit her nose as she became more alert. “I’m glad you woke me. Let’s go get you changed.” She got out of bed and rested her hand on Ryan’s back as she led him to the living room. The load in his diaper caused him to walk a little funny. Once he was changed, she washed her hands, got some Pepto-Bismol tablets out of the medicine cabinet, and poured a glass of juice. Ryan had already gone back upstairs, so she went up to his room with the medicine. He was climbing into bed and about to turn his lamp off. “Here, honey, take these really quick.” Sharon placed the tablets in his hand and gave him the juice. Once he took the medicine, she tucked him back in and felt his forehead. “I think your fever’s gone. I’m glad you’re feeling better.” “Thanks, Sharon. You’re the best.” TBC Thanks for reading!
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Date: December 11th Came across a weird ad today. Showed grown-ups acting like kids, all happy and carefree. Got me thinking, you know? Can I ditch the whole adulting thing and join them? Life's okay as it is — work, bills, adult stuff. But those happy faces in the ad got me wondering if there's something more. A simpler life, carefree and easy. Questions buzzing in my head. Can I really ditch the usual grind? Leave behind what everyone expects? Take a plunge into something unknown? Feels like I'm at a crossroads. One path is what I know, the other is this whole regression gig. Simple, carefree, but who knows? The unknown is scary. What if it's all a gimmick, and I end up regretting it? But then again, that joy in the ad, the freedom from adult crap — kinda tempting. Sleep on it, see what tomorrow brings. Life's weird sometimes. Date: December 27th Couldn't shake off this weird obsession. Been thinking a lot about those diapers they showed in the ad. How do they feel? The thought won't leave me. Spent some time today just imagining it. The softness, the snug feeling. It's nuts, but I can't help but wonder. You know what? Screw it. I did something impulsive today. Sent off that registration form for the regression school. Yeah, me, the guy who's always got everything planned out. No turning back now. Excitement's there, mixed with nerves. Wonder what they'll say. A part of me hopes they call me crazy, that this isn't for real. But deep down, a bigger part is hoping they welcome me into their world. Guess I'll just wait now. See if this was a momentary lapse of reason or if I'm diving headfirst into the world of diapers and pacifiers. Whatever happens, it's gonna be a hell of a story to tell someday. Date: December 31st The year's winding down, and so is the time before I jump headfirst into this regression thing. Tomorrow's the big day, the beginning of a journey I never thought I'd take. I've got the sabbatical lined up, so no work for the next six months. Full immersion into whatever this is. Nerves are kicking in. Can't help but second-guess what I put on that registration form. Total removal of potty training? Reducing my speech? Man, what was I thinking? It sounded fascinating at the time, but now the doubts are creeping in. Is this too much, too fast? But, truth be told, there's a part of me that's looking forward to it. As crazy as it sounds, the idea of regressing, letting go of all the adult crap for a while, has this strange appeal. Maybe it's a way to escape the grind, or maybe I've just lost my marbles. Let's see how it goes. Here's to hoping it's not a total disaster. Cheers to a new year, a new experience, and a version of me that's gonna be all kinds of messed up. Date: January 1st Started the day in my normal adult clothes, but that didn't last long. A female caregiver, friendly but assertive, made it clear that it was time for a change. Before I knew it, I was stripped down, underwear included, feeling more exposed than I had in years. There's a weird blend of humiliation and liberation in being undressed like that, as if shedding my adult clothes was shedding some of my adult responsibilities. And then came the diaper. It felt like a cloud wrapped around my privates, strangely soft and comforting. I couldn't help but blush as she fastened it snugly around me. I've never had anyone else diaper me, and there's something oddly intimate about it. But here I was, surrendering control willingly. She dressed me without asking for my input, asserting her role as the one in charge. All I got was a t-shirt that left my diaper exposed. It was an amazing feeling, an unexpected rush that I didn't anticipate. It's funny how the smallest things can make you feel little, and it's even funnier how that makes you feel taken care of. With a gentle spank on the butt, she sent me off to play. The mix of embarrassment and excitement stayed with me, each step a reminder that I was willingly diving into this regression experience. Day one down, and I'm already feeling like a little kid with a whole new set of rules to navigate. Let's see where this journey takes me. Date: January 4 th The caregivers have a routine of checking our diapers periodically, seemingly without any regard for our dignity or privacy. It's not like they ask if we're dry or need a change; they just dive right in and inspect, their faces devoid of judgment but their actions speaking volumes. Each diaper check feels like a spotlight shining on my new position as toddler. There's something about the way they lift up the back of my shirt and peek inside my diaper that makes me feel so small, like a helpless little kid but I’m guessing that’s the point. Today's diaper check was no exception. Samantha, with her gentle but firm demeanor, beckoned me over for my turn. I complied reluctantly, feeling every bit like a toddler. With practiced efficiency, she groped the front of my soggy diaper. The sense of embarrassment only intensified when she announced matter-of-factly that I needed a change. As Samantha proceeded to clean and diaper me, I couldn't shake the feeling of infantilization that washed over me. Each tug of the wipes and rustle of the fresh diaper served as a stark reminder of my regression journey, leaving me feeling smaller and more helpless than ever before. Date: January 17 th So, I'm two weeks deep into this regression experiment, and it's insane how fast I've gotten used to it. The craziest part? I haven't sat on a toilet for the past five days. Not at home, not anywhere. It's all about the diapers now, and honestly, it's not a bad gig. Every morning, I waddle to regression school with a loaded diaper, and it's become this routine that feels oddly freeing. The reactions from the caregivers and other students range from surprise to straight-up cheers. It's like waddeling with a loaded diaper is a badge of honor around here. Got a wild story from today. I was focused in some play, felt the urge to mess my diaper, and just went for it right then and there. No shame, no holding back. It's funny how quickly I've embraced this side of things. Went straight to Samantha, my favorite caregiver, with a big grin on my face. She sees the messy diaper and praises me for being a good boy. The tingles that went down my spine were something else. It's strange how a simple act can make you feel both empowered and vulnerable at the same time. But Samantha's praise made it all feel right. Who would have thought messing a diaper could be so, well, thrilling? Can't wait to see where it goes from here. Date: January 23rd OMG, guess what happened today? Samantha totally surprised me with a pacifier, and get this—it's got my fave animal, a fox, on it! It's crazy how something so simple can be super calming. When I put that paci in my mouth, it's like I'm being cuddled, all safe and cozy. But the best part? When Samantha and the other caregivers see me with it, they go all "aww" and call me cute and adorable. It gives me this warm, fuzzy feeling. It's like I've hit a new level of being noticed. The good vibes just keep coming, making me feel so comfy and happy. Napping has become part of my day too. The paci was amazing, it helped me fall asleep soooo quickly today during naptime. The sucking and the soft feel on my tongue make me feel even more secure. Date: February 6th Today was super surprising! While they were checking my diaper like they always do, the caregiver decided I needed a change. I was so surprised because I thought I only wet it once. But guess what? I must have had a real accident when I was busy playing with my Legos.. Yep, I was so into building my Lego masterpiece that I didn't even notice. It was a big surprise for me, and the caregiver got really happy when she saw my surprised face. What's really getting to me is that it's not just about wetting. They want me to be like, super not able to control it. It's kinda sinking in, and I'm starting to get how deep this whole going-back thing is. It's not just about toys and pacifiers; they're changing everything, even how my body works. Date: February 24 I wonder if my talkin' is gettin' more little or if it's just me imaginin'. Like, when I put these words down, they seem simple, like when I was a kiddo. But am I really talkin' like a little one now? Sometimes I think, "Hey, Eli, you're talkin' like a grown-up." But then, I look at these words, and they're all basic. Today, I heard two friends talkin' 'bout tryin' not to pee for as long as they can. They're all serious 'bout it, like it's some big competition. I just don't get it. Why try not to pee when we got these comfy diapers? I ain't tryin' to hold it, and guess what? I've been waking up with a super soggy diaper at night lots of times. But you know what's cool? The grown-ups who take care of us really like it. They're super happy that I'm all into this part of bein' a little one. Date: March 13 Today was a fun one! So, there I was, at the changin' table with Samantha, waiting for her to clean me up. She starts sayin' all these nice things 'bout me, callin' me a good diaper filler. Gotta admit, it made me feel all warm and tingly inside. Then, she starts rubbin' my soggy diaper, and I'm tryin' not to moan too loud behind my paci. It's like she knows just how to make me feel all tingly and excited. And then somethin' even funnier happened. Samantha noticed how excited I got, and she kept on rubbin' my diaper until, well, I had a sticky accident right there. Golly, to me, nothin' has ever felt as good as havin' a sticky accident in my soggy diaper. Oh, I forgot to mention somethin' important. You see, before I was a little guy, I used to have these accidents, but back then, we called 'em somethin' else. Grown-ups and big boys have a special word for it, but I'm not supposed to use those words anymore. Well anyway I stopped having them when I joined the regression school. Now, they're back but only as sticky accidents in my diaper, and Samantha says I'm a good boy for it. Journal Entry - March 23 Guess what happened today? I was playin' with the big, colorful building blocks, and it was so much fun! I got so caught up that, well, I kinda messed my diaper. Oopsie! But you know what? It didn't bother me much 'cause I was havin' too much fun. Later, I saw Samantha talkin' to Lisa, a new caregiver. They both looked at me and started laughin'. I didn't know why, but then Lisa walked over, and she squished the mess in my diaper! It made me giggle and wiggle; it was silly and funny. Being a little guy is so much fun, and the caregivers are super nice. I don't even mind the messy diapers that much. They just make me feel all little and happy. Journal Entry - April 7 Eli here with more little updates. So, things have been kinda interesting lately. Lisa, you know, the caregiver pals with Samantha, spends lots and lots of time with me. She's always there, putting my paci back in my mouth even though it's practically glued there. I'm such a good boy that I don't even need reminders anymore! She teased me today 'cause I dribble a lot in my diaper. I can't help it; it just happens. But you know what? I kinda like it. Lisa said I'm never dry anymore, and she laughed. It made me feel little and happy. Being a big boy and staying dry is overrated, right? Oh, and guess what? Lisa only lets me have sticky accidents when I've eaten my veggies at lunch and my diaper is already messy. Samantha's happy with just the messy diaper, but Lisa says I need to be a good boy all the way. Journal Entry – April 21 It's Eli with another little update. Today was a bit different, and I'm not sure how to feel about it. So, I saw Samantha and Lisa, you know, the caregivers who take care of me, sharing a kiss. It felt kinda strange, like a twinge in my tummy. I think I felt...jealous? Yeah, that's the word. I wanted all their attention on me. I mean, they're both so nice, and I love when they play with me, but today, seeing them together like that...it made me want more. Anyway, watching them kiss made my little buddy down there feel all tingly again, pressing against my soggy diaper. It's like it wanted some attention too. Silly little thing! Journal Entry - May 2 Guess what? Something big happened today. So, Lisa and Samantha, you know, the caregivers I always talk about? Well, they told me something amazing. They're actually a couple! Can you believe it? I didn't see that coming. And get this – Lisa started volunteering (that's a big word, huh?) at the regression school because Samantha wanted to adopt me. Yeah, me! I couldn't believe it. It's like a dream come true. I've got two mommies now, and they take such good care of me. They even asked me if I'd like to move in with them. Can you imagine? Being the baby of two mommies! I giggled and clapped my hands with joy. Of course, I said yes. Why wouldn't I? It's like living in a world full of cuddles, playtime, and soggy diapers. Life is pretty awesome right now. Journal Entry – May 29 Big news today! Lisa and Samantha officially adopted me! Can you believe it? Now I get to live with them, and it's amazing. They turned one of the rooms into a nursery just for me. Let me tell you about my room. There's a cozy crib that's super comfy, a changing table for when my mommies decide that I need a fresh diaper (which is quite often), and lots and lots of soft toys. No Legos, though. Lisa says I'm too little for that. But hey, who needs Legos when you've got plushies to cuddle with? I love it here. The nursery feels like my own little kingdom, and Lisa and Samantha are the best mommies ever. They take such good care of me. I even get to go to the regression school with Samantha, so I still get to see all my friends. Journal Entry – June 4 Hiya Diary, Today was another day of fun and surprises. Lisa asked me if my diaper was wet while I was in my stroller, all snug and cozy. I was a bit puzzled; after all, I can't really tell if it's wet or not. This seemed to make Lisa super happy, though. I told her it's probably just because of my shortalls. Usually, I can peek and see if my diaper is soggy or not, but with these cute shortalls, it's a bit tricky. I guess that's why I didn't notice. Anyway, mommy seemed pleased, so I'm pleased too. Journal Entry – June 26 Today was a bit different. Mommy Samantha had a special lesson for me. She wanted me to stay in a messy diaper for a few hours, all to help me learn to be messy without even noticing. The thought of it made my little buddy all tingly again. Samantha was quick to rub my diaper, but she stopped just before I had another sticky accident, leaving me panting and wanting more. After sitting for what felt like forever (I can't read the clock anymore, oopsie!), she finally let me have that sticky accident. It was like a little reward for being such a good boy during the lesson. Journal Entry – July 8 Today was super fun! Mommy Lisa fed me lunch in my highchair, and she was so proud that I didn't remove or spit out my paci all day. It stayed in my mouth since this morning, and it made me giggle lots. After lunch, Mommy Lisa happily explained that she's also proud of me for not noticing that my diaper is messy. But when she said that, I suddenly sniffed and realized it was! I guess my nose tricked me. But I'm happy about it because I know it makes my mommies happy. Mommy Lisa asked if I wanted a fresh diaper after lunch, but I said no. I want to be in a messy diaper for Mommy Samantha when she comes home. This made Mommy Lisa so happy that she decided to make me have a sticky accident right then and there. As she rubbed my diaper, I felt a tingly excitement building up, and before I knew it, I had a sticky accident in my messy diaper. It's happening faster and faster, needing always fewer touches or rubbing. Mommy Lisa praised me again, saying what a good boy I am. It felt warm and fuzzy, and I couldn't stop giggling. When Mommy Samantha came home and found me asleep in my crib with a messy diaper, she decided to wake me up in the most special way. Gently, she started rubbing my diaper, and before I knew it, I had another sticky accident. She called me a good baby and hugged me tightly. I felt so safe and loved in her arms.
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More Littles with Sugar than Salt How do you get what you can’t have but really want? There are better ways than forcing someone to your will. That always ends poorly, instead use a little sugar and you may get a lot farther than you’d think. This story is how I ended up getting myself into a “dreaded” adoption but it wasn’t so bad. Actually, it’s kind of nice… I was walking home as I usually did, I could have taken an auto car or even the rotor platforms, flat things that moved you where you wanted to go, no roof but got there fast. not much going on for me, but I liked it that way. Work had been a little rough, my amazon boss had been riding my a$$ about being able to keep up with the giants and pull my own weight. That was a funny thought, I don't weigh a tenth of what those hippos weighed so shouldn’t my work be “lighter” too? God! they were annoying creatures, every female treating me like I'm 3 wiping my face and making sure I can get to the "potty" on time. Every male calling me "sport" or "buddy." Really, such a superiority complex. Anyway, here I am going home on my usual route stretching my legs and enjoying a nice afternoon, the setting sun gave a good vibe of a peaceful night. Probably enjoy a good beer on the back porch when I got done with dinner. Not like I had anyone to answer to tonight. Single life was something of a blessing and a curse. While no one was there for you, you also didn't have to justify spending that 100 dollars for that thing you wanted. My walk home usually brought me close to a few of the "fee fi fo fums" in the neighborhood but they tended to be well behaved. A couple might try to drug me just so they could diaper me on the sidewalk, since they were not allowed to force adoption anymore. That was the worst case scenario. You could usually tell those ones right away, for instance, take the behemoth Bella Carter. Every week it was a new baked thing or the new fried that, and she loved giving them to me. I had tried a few here and there, in private of course, to see what would happen. It only reinforced the rule you never take things from a giant. I had a friend that once took a pillow once, seems innocent right? Well, technology being what it is and the giants being what they are, it ended up being an auto diaper and boy was it thorough. When he layed on it it activated, a small puff of knockout gas, followed by a fast numbing agent, it put itself on him and performed incontinence surgery on him right there. Poor guy ended up giving up, couldn't afford to fix it, the price of keeping up with his new needs was too high, he just walked down the street and told the monster he would do what she wanted. Last I saw he was blissfully unaware of his current state of infantilism. Buuuh, never take things from an Amazon. On this particular night, since it was so nice out, a lot of Amazon's were out and about or sitting on a porch. Everyone of them offering a small encouragement to get home before dark, or "hope your well sweetie" or "you're such a big boy walking home alone." Arriving at my street Bella was out walking her dog. Of course she was carrying some cookies, upon seeing me she immediately ran over to me exclaiming "oh, cutie pie! I made you a little something." I rolled my eyes and turned to face the thundering elephant bounding towards me on tree pole legs. "I know you're gonna love these," she said with a rather southern twang. It would be almost charming, if she wasn't trying to poison my digestive tract for the next week. "OH, miss Carter I didn't see you there, how are you tonight?" I replied, "it's a wonderful evening and I'm ready to get home from work and relax a little over the weekend. Gotta get to it." Trying to sound polite and not give her a reason to invoke the "Impromptu Needed Attitude Adjustment law. She didn't even act like she heard me, "will you give them a try? I made them this afternoon." Looking at her offering, it had the same logo that the "Love your Little" pharmacy used. Cooked it? Yeah, I had heard her cooking would probably have killed me, not just left me without bowel control for a week. "Oh wow, I'll have to give them a try on the way, I'm super tired after a long week, miss Carter, I'll just scoot along and give one a go on the way, deal?" Not one to give up easily, she replies "oh it'll give you a pep in your step." I'm sure it would, so much so I'd be running home. Starting to walk I quipped "Yeah but I don't want to ruin my dinner, you know how we littles are. I promise next time I see you i'll let you know what I think, deal?" "Oh all right, make sure you eat your vegetables tonight to. Be a good boy and I'll see you next time." Walking on until I was certain she couldn't see me, I dumped them into a trashcan, keeping the bag so I could return it to her as evidence i had eaten them, it was fun this way. She always had such a confused look on her face when i never had any issues. I received 2 more "gifts" on my way before I reached the Littles part of the neighborhood. Here there was a small gap with just some trees and no lights or anything, it divided the Giant houses from the littles houses. I Always feel nervous here, it made me feel like I was being watched or like a wolf was waiting to attack me. Tonight was no different so I picked up my pace. By now the light was starting to dim, and it was getting hard to see into the trees very far. However, that's not where the danger came from. I should have seen it, should have heard it but I assumed I was safe, and I let my guard down. A hand snaked around my waist, grabbing me and lifting me straight up about 5 feet. Carrying me into the trees I heard a female voice say "You are a rather curious one, and I'm not going to lie to you, curious littles are kind of my thing. Don't worry, I won't hurt you. In fact I hope you enjoy tonight's entertainment." About that time she plopped me onto a folding table, pretty certain I was about to be spanked into oblivion I rebelled, "I haven't done anything to deserve an attitude adjustment! Leave me alone!" I began kicking and trying to escape. A rather pleasant face came into view over top of me, a face that felt familiar in spite of never having met her. She spoke again, obviously surprised, "Spank you? no, I would never! You're a good little boy aren't you? At Least, that's what I've seen." "You were watching me? Isn't that stalking? What do you want?" "Only to reward you," her answer threw me off. No amazon rewards a little, ever. It had never happened in written history. Even before the demons had infested the little dimensions with portals. The words alone stunned me better than a punch to the face. In a heartbeat she had my pants off, my legs went up, which was enough to shake me out of my confusion. "Hey! what're you doing? Stop!! You said I hadn't done anything wrong." At that point something warm and very much like a slimy ball went right in my bum. It made me feel sick, I was going to spend a lifetime on the toilet, I just knew it. Maybe it was some kind of new hormone thing and I will be a girl tomorrow. Man, the problems of explaining that to my boss or my family. "Don't worry, it has some… undesirable side effects but they will wear off by morning. I don't like doing it this way but its hard to get you littles to believe I won't harm you." She replied coolly. "Now let me finish before it all starts getting into that cutie patootie system of yours" I was certain I heard a hint of baby talk in that last bit, but I wasn't going to fight whatever this was, why you might ask? It was already bad, and going to get worse if I put up a fight. No, she wouldn't adopt me, the penalty for that basically made her take my place with a new amazon. It wasn't something you heard of Amazons trying anymore. This however, was well within her rights. I felt my legs go up again and a soft padding went under my rear. Great! Yup it was a diaper. "Don't worry hun, it'll be just this one, I promise no more unless you want them." "Want them? WANT THEM?!" I was almost yelling. "Why would I ever want them?!?" "Don't worry, my little love, I promised you a reward, and believe me it will be one." At that moment my stomach twisted. I must have reacted because she quickly went back to her demonic work of putting me in padding. "That's my que, I promise no one has ever complained about this part." No one? As she pulled the diaper up I felt really really small and out of control, something I was not accustomed to. I was rapidly taped in inspite of my continued protests, she ignored me completely while she finished. And then… it started. It was wonderful, a pleasure like I had never felt. It wasn't sexual, or anything else I had ever had. It started small, like that first bite of cake when you have been staring at it for an hour. Or when you get that first drink after being incredibly thirsty. Oh it was good, but there was more it grew, it became as strong as an orgasm but there wasn't an orgasm. I felt the hands that lifted me up and pressed me against 2 soft pillows, wait those were breasts. The behemoth had laid me against her chest, she was going to kidnap me! "Hush, my little pretty boy, I'll make sure you're safe and sound. I'll bring you to your home and get you in bed, don't you worry. Shhh shhh, I've got you." At this point I didn't care, the pleasure had grown so much, it seemed to vibrate and caress and gently massage and everything all at once. My fatigue washed away and the fact I was in nothing but a diaper and a t-shirt laid against two, truthfully soft, giant mounds of my doom, didn't matter at all. My world was washed out in beautiful warm colors. I don't know how long it lasted, but I savored every second of it. It was luxurious, beyond sex, beyond a good beer, beyond anything I had ever known. And then everything faded out, I didn't know where I was, nor did I care, I was so tired, I was so relaxed I slept, a perfect sleep. Ch2. Where the sun doesn't shine or Butter up buttercup. *sniff sniff* ugh I was so tired. *sniff sniff* What was that smell? My consciousness returned slowly, mostly I became aware of the stench. Good dog almighty it was awful. I opened my eyes to the sun coming in my window, which had been opened. "I didn't do that," I thought. "How did I even get home?" Then it all came crashing home, as if my brain finally decided to wake up. The whole thing, but I didn't remember ever getting home or really anything after all the glorious fun had ended. But what was that smell? It was my butt. I lifted my body up to stand and became acutely aware of the diaper still taped around me. The smell was emanating from it. Sure enough, I could feel the mush inside it. Strangely, I wasn't even mad, I was kind of ready to be rid of it, though. The mushy mess shifted as I stood up, so gross. I reached down and grabbed a tab only to be rewarded with tape stuck fast. Great its a littleez, the diaper meant to stop any little from easily escaping it . It wasn't coming off without an Amazon or a pair of sharp scissors. Luckily, I stocked such items in my junk drawer. Moving downstairs in the most awkward yet, least poo touching way possible, I hurried to my freedom. Only, I was stopped by a packet on the counter, it only read "READ ME FIRST" in giant letters. I picked it up and opened the cover, and began reading… "I know this wasn't the state you wanted to wake up in, but I felt you may be ok with it after the enjoyment you got from last night. Don't worry your current state is far from permanent. Matter of fact the side effects should be wearing off or even gone by now. You'll be able to tell easily as there will be a slight green ooze in the front of your, im sure, rather full diaper." Curiosity got the best of me, sure enough, after pulling the waistband back just a little there was a green slime there. "This is built in so you know the end of this particular pleasure pill. I'm quite certain you have more questions and I will answer them in the next pages, but why don't you cut that diaper off and take a nice warm shower first then read on." That actually sounded smart. Moving to the bathroom I took care of the giant fluffy sack of crap around my waist. Climbed in the shower and let warm water run down my spine and now cleaner buttocks. I wondered at technology, after all these advancements we couldn't even upgrade our cleanliness, nothing beat a showe. The shower did feel almost righteous though, I guess you don't fix what's not broken. After drying off, I bagged the nastiness and threw it away, it was shaping up to be a nice day so I sat on the back porch to read, I didn't want to be disturbed: "My name is Tina Herringer, I am not an enemy but rather a simple purveyor of pleasurable items for you Littles. I do not want to harm you, only help you" sure sure, id heard that before. " what I gave you last night was a pleasure ball, or anal super stimulator, A.S.S for short, yes yes, I am aware of the funny you Littles see in that word. These pills are designed to give you more pleasure than you've ever felt before, the unfortunate side effect is incontinence of both kinds, bowel and urinary. I'm sure you noticed." Yeah, the house still wreaks, I thought. "So I'm sure by now you're wondering, why me? Well that's simple enough. You're a good boy. You don't cause trouble, or fight with other Littles, you don't argue with the maternity crazed Amazons. You are a good boy, you should be rewarded. I like to give good things to good boys. I mean what I say, I want to give you more. In good faith I have placed another pill in your underwear drawer, and yes another diaper, in case you'd like to give them another try. There is another note in the drawer as well. It contains more information than I have given here. Please do not read it until you use the pill, I would like you to be a good boy and wear the diaper as well. It is an auto diaper unlike the one you had on last night. It will release itself when you have filled it. Remember once it's on it doesn't come off without you using it for what it is for. If you use the pill and not the diaper I will know." On that note, the note ended. It felt a little ominous, I knew I should immediately go throw it away, but I really didn't want to. Was it really worth the potential issues? I mean she had been honest, I regained my control. At least I haven't peed myself yet. Whose to say the next one wouldn't make things worse? This Tina also knew too much. I didn't like it. I went upstairs and straight to the drawer, it was going to go in the incinerator trash immediately. There it was exactly as she had said in the note, a diaper, a glove, wipes, a note and of course the A.S.S. Grabbing everything I went straight outside to the chute that would burn it all. I flipped up the latch and hesitated. How would she know? Would she seek retribution if I tossed them? I lifted the pill off the pile of supplies. My mouth began to water, my whole body wanted it, I was trembling. How could I throw it away? I decided right there to keep the pill and note. Tossing the diaper and supplies, fudge the consequences. Taking it back inside with me I made a cup of coffee and sat down with the pill. It was in a tube like a prescription would come in. The label read," self lubricating, take one rectally, never more than one in a 24 hour period. Make sure to properly diaper anyone taking this medication, extreme loss of continence is expected lasting as long as 12 hours." What was I thinking? NEVER TAKE ANYTHING FROM THESE DEVILS. I just couldn't stop myself, she seemed sincere, and I… I trusted her?. Did I? It sure felt that way. Whatever, let's test this theory, I popped the lid open and pulled out the pill. It looked for all the world like a large green piece of candy. In a rush I dropped my pants and prepared myself, I was elated, I was desperate… in a flash it came to me i was standing in my kitchen with open windows to the world, and I was Half naked. Instead of coming to my senses I went to the bathtub, you know, just in case she wasn't lying about the incontinence part. Bent over and like magic it seemed to turn into a slimy thing as it was pressed into where the sun doesn't shine. A couple minutes later I was about to give up, it had seemed like only a few seconds last night, why was it taking so long? Stepping out of the tub and i felt the twinge I felt last night. It was happening, I was almost drooling on myself. The excitement and anticipation came on like a wave. I tried to get back into the tub but the pleasure started and it was all I could do to hold myself upright. With the next wave I went to my knees, and the third wave washed my world out again. I hovered in pure bliss for eternity again. Floating in an ocean of warm orange and yellow, caressed by the most gentle feeling ever. It was ecstasy once more…
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Hi there If there's one thing that can definitely be said about me, it's that I'm not well hung down below. In fact, I've got a pretty small penis. Whilst there are some minuses to that, there are also advantages, including being able to wear any style of underwear and, of course diapers, with ease. I'd be interested to know if there are any large or above average guys on here, and whether it affects their ability to easily or comfortably wear diapers, whether it's from choice or for a medical reason.
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Hey everyone! I'm new here, but have been a super long-time lurker. I started this story a while ago, pre-pandemic, but have recently been interested in continuing working on it. Full disclosure, I initially posted this on reddit years ago, but I'm such a fan of a lot of the writing and discussion that happens here, so I figured I'd throw my hat in the ring. I would love any and all feedback and criticism y'all might have! Could help me as I start mapping out where I'd like to go with the story! This is a gay story, so if that's not your thing, fair warning. There's also some cursing. And finally, though these first three chapters don't involve it (beyond a passing mention), there will be messing involved in this story later on. ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Chapter One: A New Beginning I nearly slipped on a pile of loose dirt as I sprinted around a corner into a narrow alleyway. My heart thumping out of my chest, I swiftly dodged a heap of trash bags and a stained couch missing one of its cushions. I couldn’t look back. There was no time. I wasn’t sure quite why I was so afraid, or where exactly I was running, but regardless I zoomed my way out of the alley and around the corner onto the adjacent street. Suddenly finding myself weaving through a million cars and taxis and dogs and pedestrians, I just about lost my mind. I could feel some sort of doom trailing behind me, crashing like some sort of tidal wave. But I couldn’t think about it. I swear, it was as if all that I was, my entire essence had become just RUN RUN RUN RUN. If I was even breathing, it was light-years faster than my pace, like, a thousand breaths a second. Don’t breathe, I thought, just run. Don’t turn around, just run. Don’t think.... Oh god, what’s happening? I looked down at my legs leaping across the pavement, but something was wrong. They weren’t moving. I could feel my body piercing the air, speeding down the street like some deranged, out of control bullet, but my feet just hung in place. Staring at my limp legs, I could hear the mighty flood approaching, only inches behind me. Before I could even turn to meet my fate, I was consumed by immense, devastating crash, cracking my bones and crumbling my body beneath it. I sensed the wave pulling me in, breaking into every crevice of the world, drenching everything in darkness. ******** “Jesus fuck!” Without warning, I jolted awake, out of breath. Blinded by the sun, I looked over at my brother hunched over at the wheel. “It’s called a blinker, shit head!” he swerved his truck a little, going to town on the horn. “What the hell, Jake?” I scratched the sleep out of my eyes. “Sorry dude, the road’s filled with jackasses today,” Jake turned and looked at me, adopting the same annoying singsong voice he used to tease me with back when we were younger. “And good morning Zachy, hope you enjoyed your little nap while I had to drive here in silence.” “Screw you, man.” I yawned and stretched upright in my seat, trying to get my bearings. How long had I slept? We seemed to be cruising at a decent pace down the highway. I took a few heavy breaths and my pulse finally started to slow down. I grabbed my phone out of the passenger door. 11:20pm. We probably still had a good hour or so before we arrived. “Look, I’m sorry,” I said as I opened up facebook out of habit. “I guess I was more tired than I thought.” Jake looked back at the road. “You gonna need to change soon?” “What? Come on Jake, are you seriously... no, I’m fine, okay?” I blushed, and turned to look out my window. “Sorry Zach,” Jake chuckled. “Just askin’. We still got a ways to go.” “Well, I’m good, so....” I didn’t even finish my thought as I buried my attention into my phone. Truth is, I didn’t know if I was dry or not. Look, it’s super embarrassing, and I can’t believe I’m admitting this, but to be totally honest... I’ve always had issues controlling, I guess you’d say, my bathroom habits. Like, it’s a thing. Has been my whole life. Forgetting a few random incidents over time, I pretty much stopped regularly pooping myself back when I was seven years old, and by the time I started 8th grade when I was thirteen, my daytime wetting mostly went away. However, no matter how much I cringe, or how many hours before bed I stop drinking, or what pill or nasal spray or alarm my parents gave me, I never quite outgrew wetting the bed. Just imagine that! Being nineteen, about to enter your Sophomore year at a big, prestigious university, top of your class, a solid group of friends... and you still piss your friggin' pants. I mean, who wants to be, let alone be friends with, a guy who has to wear diapers to bed, and on long trips, and sometimes even to long exams or movies, just to avoid staining their clothes and furniture? Even though it’s been almost two decades, I still find myself constantly shocked and disgusted with myself. Not really finding much of anything interesting on Facebook (no surprise there), I subtly crossed my legs and reached my hand down to feel my crotch. Charming, I know. I sighed and relaxed my shoulders. There was no denying it. I was wet. Not even that, I was soaked. I can tell you, wearing an adult diaper at all (especially these big overnight ones my parents got me) is thick no matter what, but a diaper full of pee is a whole other story. Rather than the tight, stiff padding I’d felt when I put this diaper on before the ride, my hand was now greeted with a super thick, mushy bulb of squishiness covering my groin. Instinctively, I lifted my butt and felt underneath. Still firm and flat... still dry down there. “You okay there, buddy?” I turned to see Jake staring at me feeling myself up. “It’s cool if you do need to change.” “Dude, drop it. I’m fine,” I pouted back at him. I hated that I still had this problem, but not as much as I absolutely loathed that anyone on this planet, especially my brother, knew about it. At least none of my college friends had found out yet. “Look Zach, I’m not bustin’ your balls or anything. It’s just when we’re living together this year, especially if I’m gonna have to drive you around and shit, I mean... there’s no use being weird about it, right? I already know, I don’t give a shit any more, and it’s gonna be pretty hard to hide, so... whatever you’re pissed about, just try to get over it.” Of course he had to use the word pissed. “I’ll last the rest of the way, okay? It’s cool.” I rolled my eyes and landed them back at my phone. I hated every second of this. “Whatever you say, man. Just let me know.” Jake turned on his blinker and merged to the left, and I swear I could see a slight grin on his face. I was happy to be getting out of the dorms and to start my Sophomore year, and while I was mostly pumped to share a small house with my Junior brother, I couldn’t help but think he wouldn’t make it easy on me. Chapter Two: Moving In By the time my brother pulled up into the driveway of our new house, I was desperate to get inside. Not only was I just ready to be away from him after his frank discussion about my... needs... I also seriously needed to run to the bathroom. It wasn’t long after Jake and I stopped talking that I could feel the urge to pee slowly creeping up on me. Even though I was already wearing protection, there was no way I was going to use it consciously, especially since I’d already wet it during my unexpected nap. After all, what was the point of denying I might need to change if I was just gonna end up leaking all over Jake’s leather seats? Before Jake had even fully come to a stop, I was already busting out of the truck and sprinting up the steps too our new house. Focused on the ever increasing pain from my bladder, I grabbed the handle of the front door and pressed my whole weight against it. Nothing. I was stopped dead in my tracks. “Slow down there, man, I still have the keys,” Jake laughed behind me. I whirled around and watched him slowly step onto the driveway, digging through a large envelope full of our move-in supplies. I don’t know why I assumed the house would be open. “Well hurry up Jake, jeez, “ I pleaded, gritting my teeth. “What’s your rush? Just use your diaper.” Was he serious right now? “Shut up, man!” “Well that’s what it’s for, right?” Walking up to me, he pulled a key out and handed it over. I immediately grabbed it and jammed it into the lock. “Well you don’t have to say it out loud.” I struggled for a second, before I finally got the key in and turned it open. “I’m just messing with you, Zach. No one’s even around.” “Whatever.” Even though we’d both toured this house just a few months earlier, it still took me a good moment to remember where the bathroom was. Feeling like my bladder was essentially the gate of Helm’s Deep just shy of bursting open by a torrential flood of Orcs, I rushed down the hallway near the kitchen and nearly threw myself at the toilet once I found it. Without hesitation I jerked open my jeans zipper and shoved down the top of my boxer briefs and diaper. Pee was already trickling out of my dick, but I didn’t have time to care care. I adjusted my aim the best I could and let it loose. Ohhhhh god, it felt so good. In a haze of euphoria, the stream slowed down to a stop. I opened my eyes for what felt like the first time and turned around, only to see Jake standing in the doorway. “Dude, what the hell?” I shouted as I tried to tuck my junk back in and hide the diaper with my shirt. “Enjoying the friggin' show?” Jake just laughed. “I still think it’s funny you won’t say fuck.” “Well fuck off, how about that?” He raised his eyebrows and laughed even harder. I even surprised myself with that one. “Well shit, look at you. Come help me unload when you’re ready.” With that, he left. I slammed the door shut (should’ve done that before) and, letting out a long, beleaguered breath, I checked the damage. The toilet seat was covered with a puddle of my yellow piss, and of course I’d managed to get more than a few spots on my pants in the process. Welp, at least I didn’t downright, full-on pee my pants. Hearing Jake throwing down some heavy boxes out in the living room, I ripped open the four tapes on my diaper and balled it up on the counter. Trying to hurry and get out of there, I froze and caught a quick glance of myself in the mirror. My stubble was coming in pretty dark, which I thought actually looked pretty good. I’d taken a risk over the summer chopping off my long high school locks and getting one of those cuts with the shaved sides with longer hair on top. I had been so used to my old shaggy style that I wasn’t sure how much I liked this new look... I’ve always been a bit lanky and goofy, and I guess I just didn’t have the confidence to sport what I thought was such a bold, adult haircut. I had to admit though, seeing myself there with my slicked back, dark brown hair, with a solid 4 o’clock (at most) shadow, I couldn’t help but think that I was a pretty darn good looking man. I buttoned up my now loose jeans and headed back out the door, feeling satisfied with myself. “Hey, come help me out with the bookcases.” My brother had already gotten four or five big boxes into the house, and had worked up a small sweat. Neither of us was particularly athletic, but dang if we couldn’t get hard work done when we put our minds to it. The next couple hours were mostly uneventful, just moving our crap into the house. We figured it would be best to just get everything in and sort it out into their respective rooms later. The less time struggling out in the hot summer sun, the better. After getting the bulk of the boxes and bins, we helped each other carry our beds and furniture into our rooms, and together we set up a nice little couch and coffee table left over from Jake’s old house. It was well past 3 in the afternoon when things started slowing down. I pried open one of our kitchen boxes and got out a cup to pour myself some water as Jake grabbed a pack of toilet paper and ran off to use the bathroom. I chugged down almost the entire glass when I realized my crotch was feeling a little damp. I glanced down only to see a sizable wet spot right in the middle of my jeans. Crap. Crap crap crap! I had been so focused on lugging heavy boxes back and forth that I hadn’t even noticed the urge to pee. How long had it been like that? Did my brother notice? Suddenly I heard Jake yell out my name. “What’s up?” I shouted back, trying hard to rub the wet spot dry with my hands. “You’re shitting me, right?” He called out again. I chugged down my second glass and I could hear Jake making his way down the hallway back out to the main room. The second he turned the corner, my heart sank. There he stood, holding my used diaper up like he was a hunter, showing off his latest kill. Chapter Three - New Start, Same Problems I stood there, acutely aware of the wet patch across the front of my pants, my brother gaping at me and holding up my old, soggy diaper. I didn’t know what to say. “Look, I know there was no trash can in there yet, but like... you could’ve at least taken this to the garbage out front, or something.” With his scrunched up nose and furrowed brow, he made no effort to show how disgusted he was. Or was he disappointed? Probably both. “And dude,” he continued, “You gotta clean off the toilet and flush! That shit you left for me was nasty.” “I’m sorry, Jake. I was in a rush and I guess I–“ “I’m not mad bro, but just like... be a fuckin adult, right?” He walked over and handed me the diaper of shame. “What do you want me to do with this?” As if I didn’t know. He laughed incredulously. “Go throw it out, dude. There’s some trash bags on the table.” I stood dumbfounded for a second, but knew he was right. Slapping my cup back on the kitchen counter, I walked over to the table and pulled out a bag. “And, uh,” Jake paused for a second as I shook open the trash bag and my old diaper plop down into it with a thud. “You might wanna grab some new pants there, huh buddy?” I could feel my cheeks turn crimson as I stepped out into the front yard and over to the garbage bins at the end of the driveway, doing my best to cover the front of my pants with the bagged up diaper. I don’t really like to talk about it, but these kinds of accidents had been happening more and more frequently ever since I started my freshman year. Even though I’d always had issues day and night, I had gotten through my Senior year at Oak Park Academy without any full blown accidents during the day, and I was only wetting the bed, like, three or so nights a week, which was a huge victory for me. I even stopped packing an extra pairs of shorts in my backpack for a good five months! However, college hit me hard I guess, and just seemed to screw everything up. After only a week into my first semester, I began waking up each morning to that familiar damp, musty feeling of a saturated diaper more and more often. Before I knew it, a month had gone by with no dry nights, and then a semester, and then a whole school year. I couldn’t even make it through naps without releasing a flood that rivaled Noah’s after a while! I really hoped that removing myself from the stress of school and returning home over the summer would reset my body, but it kept happening. Every. Friggin'. Night. Thankfully, this has been so regular my whole life that my parents and brother didn’t make any issue of it when I kept throwing out clearly soaked diapers every morning and after every lazy mid-day nap. God, I never thought I would use the word “thankful” and “diaper” in the same sentence, ever... but it was nice that they didn’t raise any fuss about it. What’s really been ticking me off, though, is that at some point during my very first semester at the University, I began finding my underwear various degrees of damp every time I hit the bathroom between classes. That’s nothing particularly new for me, but this was another level. It never made it’s way past my boxer briefs and into my pants (or at least I’ve been very good at convincing myself that it hadn’t), but it was enough that I spent more days than I care to admit with a wad of toilet paper stuffed up under my penis. I knew that was gross and kind of a roundabout solution, but I don’t know... it mostly worked, and was waaaaay better than having to pad up during the day and essentially admit my old, childish problem was coming back. Today was a different story, though. This was the first time in well over two years that I had an actual stain on my pants, and I wasn’t asleep, or sick, or drunk. I didn’t even know if it had all happened at once or just gradually. It was a total surprise. I tossed the bag into our garbage bin, and silently thanked God there was no one out in the street that afternoon. Walking back into the house, I saw Jake loading dishes into our kitchen cabinets. “Hey, I went ahead and put your suitcase in your room. Come help me when you’re done changing.” He was so nonchalant about everything, which I guess was chill, but it still made me want to sink down into the floorboards and disappear forever. I walked into my room, and this time remembered to shut and lock the door. I emptied my pockets and stripped my pants and boxer briefs off, standing there for a second staring at them. How could this have happened? The pants were fine, but these boxer briefs... dang. There was no hiding I had fully released my bladder at some point during the hard labor of the day. And I hadn’t even noticed. I threw my clothes down and sat on my unmade mattress, a bag with my plastic sheet and other bedding propped up next to me at the head of the bed. I grabbed my phone and saw I had a message. “Zaaaaaaaaaaach you moved in today, right? When’s the house warming party????” Seeing a text from Mason was just about the only thing that could have made me smile right then. We met in the same English Lit class and realized that we lived on the same floor in the same dorm. We hung out pretty much every day freshman year, studying for tests together, or grabbing lunch at the mess hall, or playing Mario Kart with his roommate and such. As far as I knew, he had no idea about any of my issues, which I was really thankful about. Of course, that didn’t mean that I wasn’t constantly stressed about trying to frantically keep it hidden, especially with the many surprise late night visits he made to my single room. Also, and I think this is what really made us get close, we were both gay. I’d pretty much always been in the closet. It’s not like my family would care or shun me or anything–I’m lucky that they’re pretty cool about that sort of thing–but I don’t know. I just never really felt comfortable accepting that part of myself and opening up to other people. One day, though, while sitting on his dorm room floor amongst what was probably three weeks worth of old laundry, he came out to me. His family knew, as I understood, as well as some of his high school friends, but I guess they were all just... weird about it. A sort of don’t ask, don’t tell situation. I had to build myself up a bit inside after he told me, but I knew I had to open up to him too. I couldn’t have asked for a better first coming out experience. We hugged and laughed and I kicked his butt at a few rounds of Super Smash Bros well into the rest of the night. And yes, I definitely, you know, liked him, and thought about him more than a normal person probably should, but I never dared make a move. We were solid friends, and there was no use messing with that. Right? Figuring I couldn't sit there pants-less in my room forever, I swiped the text open and responded, “Soon man, still gotta unpack and get settled in. I’ll hit you up later.” Throwing my phone on the mattress, I walked over to my suitcase. Most of my clothes were stuffed in a box out in the living room, but thinking ahead, my brother and I both made sure to load up a suitcase with some extra outfits and amenities in case we didn’t feel like doing ALL the unpacking today. I unzipped the bag, and even though I knew what to expect, I was still slightly disheartened to see not only my rolled up shirts and pants, but a hefty stack of diapers and wipes, almost laughing at me. I disregarded them and grabbed another pair of briefs and some khakis, then went back out to join my brother, who was now unloading books and video games onto a small shelf in the living room. “What took so long?” He asked, not even looking up from the box. “You didn’t do more to than just pee in those jeans, did you?” “What?” I immediately heated up, stunned that he would even think that. “Little Zachy didn’t make a little poopy in his pants, did he?” He was just enjoying this so much. “Shut up! What, are you nine years old?” He used to rib me a lot for still needing diapers growing up, but this was the first time he’s done it since we were both in college. “I don’t know bro, you’ve done it before, so I just wanted to make sure.” “Okay, well, for one thing, it’s none of your business. And I haven’t done that since, like, 7th grade, so... screw you.” “Dude, you know I’m joking. Come grab some books.” The rest of the day came and passed. We got pretty much the whole living room and kitchen unpacked, plus all our toiletries and towels and stuff put away in the bathroom. At around 7 we decided to call it a day, and Jake heated up this frozen pasta dish for both of us. Finally at the end of the night, I retreated back to my room and grabbed my laptop, dozing off quickly watching mindless youtube videos. Despite my nap earlier in the car, I was feeling super sleepy and decided to hit the hay. I slipped off my bottoms, proudly taking note that it was all still dry, and taped on a diaper from my suitcase. Within literal seconds, I was knocked out cold on my still unmade bed.
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Here we go. It's been a long, long, long time since I started this. I've restarted it in fits and starts. I'm nearing the end and I'll be releasing chapters slowly over the next several months. I'm writing ahead of what I'm putting out. I'd thought I might wait until I'm actually done. But I'm really close, so here we go. Here are the first 18 chapters which have already been published, but are no longer on this board. Chapter 1 This was not the way Thomas Welton wanted to begin his first day at his new school. This was not the way any 13 year-old should begin any day. Tom took every insult to his maturity seriously and this one was particularly grievous. He had grown tired of everyone assuming he was a little kid, a mere elementary schooler. He was officially a teenager and even if he was a little shorter than average, adults should know better than to simply presume he wanted a kid's menu or whatever it was they did to overlook his status as a teen. These are, at any rate, the things he told himself. Though he was barely aware of it he envied younger kids, the way they didn't have to struggle to prove that they were big and mature and completely independent. Somewhere in the back of his mind the thought lingered that he had wasted his opportunity to simply be a carefree kid on his constant quest to prove himself grown-up. But no matter how aware he was of those feelings he wasn't about to let on as his mother drove him to his first day of morning daycare. Her new job required her to arrive early, too early to take Tom to school. So she had found a nearby daycare that offered a bus service to the local schools. Tom thought he could ride his bike to school but was over ruled by his mother who insisted it was much too far for that. So he sat staring glumly out the window taking some solace in the promise that this particular center had an area for Jr High students in his position so he wouldn't have to spend all morning hanging out with little kids and being treated like a little kid. He was momentarily pulled out of his brooding funk as he felt the car come to stop. This was all quite worse than than he thought. Crude art projects decorated the windows cheerfully colored playground equipment sat waiting to be used. To Tom every detail screamed that this was a place for immature little brats, something that he was not, something he never was. He stepped out of the car and glared at this rugrat jail only to be interrupted by his mother giving him a quick pat on the head before starting her way to the door. Tom gave gave a resigned sigh and followed her in. Inside the daycare center was a desk marked by a single name plate decorated with teddy bear stickers and bearing the name “Sarah.” And behind the desk the Sarah identified by the name tag sat beaming at the new mother and student who had just walked through her door. Her slightly plump round face and easy smile made her a natural for the part of a daycare teacher, To most of the parents here she was the face of the daycare and her obvious pride and experience in her work reassured them all that this was a safe and comfortable place for their little ones. “This must be my new student,” she said cheerfully “Tommy isn't it?” “Tom” he corrected her tersely. Her eyes twinkled at his attempted protest “I'm sorry Tom, I didn't know I was getting such a grown up boy.” She turned to his mother and gave her a knowing smile before asking “And what school will we be sending Tom to this morning?” “Stone Ridge Junior High” Tom answered with a a touch of pride before his mother could even speak. “Well” Sarah chuckled “I guess we really do have quite the grown up here. Before you know it he'll be working here.” Tom glowered silently as the adults went about their final arrangements “I'm sorry” Karen Welton said “he thinks he's too old for daycare so he's a little grumpy this morning.” “Well I'm sure we'll find a way to make him fit right in.” As Sarah smiled her reassurances at him Tom couldn't help but notice the odd twinkle in her eye. It took him aback momentarily and he couldn't help but think that however sweet this woman might be she meant everything she said, perhaps in ways he could never quite understand. With her business concluded Karen turned to her son and kissed him on the forehead “Have a good day at school sweety. I'll pick you up right at three, maybe we can rent a movie or something.” Tom mumbled a good-bye and watched her walk through the door, leaving him in the care of Kiddie Town Daycare. Sarah called over one of the teachers and introduced her to Tom. “Linda” she said calling over a younger blond haired woman and handing her a packet of papers “this is our new boy, would you mind showing him around.” Tom this is Linda she'll show you where to put your things and get you settled in.” “Come on Tommy” Linda smiled “I'm sure you'll have lots of fun here.” Tom crossed his arms and issued his correction for the second time today “I only like to be called Tom.” “I'll be sure to remember that” Linda said paying little attention to her new charge's indignation “These are the cubbies we part all our things in, well make sure to get your name on yours.” She explained using the voice she obviously reserved for small children as took his backpack and coat and tucked them neatly into his cubby. “And over here is the play area we've got toys and games on that shelf over there...” “I really just need to see the area for kids who are going to the junior high. I'm just here so I can get on the bus, I don't want to play with toys or be babysat.” “I'm sorry hon but we don't have any other kids going to your school today so we're just putting everybody in this room for now. But I'm sure you'll be able to have lots of fun in here too.” Linda said not breaking her condescending manner at all. She gave the papers Sarah had handed her a second look and shrugged before leaving Tom with some more reassurances. Tom stomped off and found a chair where we could sit and wait. “What is wrong with everybody in this town?” He thought to himself as he tried to ignore the throng of kids playing around him. It wasn't long before one of them came up to him with a big red ball in his hand “Hi, I'm Johnny and I'm in third grade, do you wanna play something.” Tom didn't even look before spitting out “Look, I'm not a little kid like you guys and I don't want to play, just leave me alone.” “Well sorry,” Johnny rolled his eyes “I was trying to be nice.” Tom returned to glaring into space as Johnny went off to play. He sat and stewed until it was finally time to board the bus. Outside he found several different buses. He stopped and look around for a second until on the the drivers leaned out the window with a clip board and called “Uh Tommy Welton, this is your bus.” Tom gritted his teeth at being called that name again but boarded the bus relieved to be done with daycare for the day. Tom looked out the window and thought about how great it would be to finally establish his new teenage life in his new town. At least he'd have something to balance out his dreadful mornings. He was bought back to reality by the driver calling out “Alright Tommy, this is where you'll be getting off.” “Tom.” he corrected as he walked hurriedly off the bus. He stepped of the bus and looked around, something obviously wasn't right. Behind him he heard the bus drive off as he tried to figure out what had happened. Finally he spotted the sign on the lawn in front of the office “Sunny Brook Elementary School.” “Shit these idiots brought me to the wrong school.” Tom muttered to himself. He cursed his luck and walked towards the office determined to clear up this grievous mistake. Little did he know the forces he was up against. Chapter 2 Tom walked into the office of Sunny Brook Elementary confident that he'd clear everything up and be on his way to Stone Ridge Junior High where he belonged. He went right up to the front desk and wasted no time getting to business “The bus dropped me off at the wrong place, I need to call somebody so I can get to the right school.” The secretary barely took her attention away from the parent she was speaking with “I'm talking with a grown-up dear, maybe you can review the rules while you wait for us to finish.” She directed his attention to a colorful poster on the back wall and went back to her business. Tom looked at the poster and gave a disgusted eye roll. It was a list of simple rules aimed at elementary school aged kids. “We let everybody have their turn” it read “We do not interrupt. We always speak politely and say 'Please' and 'Thank you'.” Tom crossed his arms and waited impatiently this was not a place he wanted to stay any longer than necessary. Finally the interminable conversation ended and Tom strided up to the desk and launched straight into his story. The secretary put her hand to her chin and pondered the situation for a moment. “There's never been a mistake like this before, this is a very well run district. What's your name hon?” “Tom Welton.” he replied finally feeling like he was getting somewhere. “Oh yes, I have a Tommy Welton listed as starting in Mrs. Sanborn's fifth grade class.” She said as though the answer to everything. “I'm not in the fifth grade and I like to be called Tom. Somebody made some sort of mistake.” “Is you mom's name Karen?” “Yes.” Tom replied impatiently. “And are you going to Kiddie Town Daycare?” “Yes,” Tom groaned “But only because I've got to take the bus.” “Well that matches what this form says, I even have your mom's signature with fifth grade checked off.” She said as though she was actually trying to talk him into this. “She probably just didn't notice.” Tom said exasperated. “Well I've never seen a error on one of these forms before. Like I said things are very well run here, we don't make mistakes like this. She caught attention of a tall kindly looking man walking through the office and pointed out Tom to him. “This child says he's supposed to go to Stone Ridge but the bus dropped him off here and he's listed as a student here.” The man pondered the situation for a second “Let's go look this up on the computer,” he turned to Tom and said “We'll be back in a minute son.” And the two went behind a door labeled “Mr. Lessen, Principal.” From behind the door Tom could bits of their conversation “He doesn't look that old to me either, but do you think a kid would really tell a lie like that.” The scowl on his face deepened. Adults were always saying things like that. It was stupid, it was perfectly obvious he was a teenager. Maybe if his mother would let him buy the clothes he wanted things like this wouldn't happen. As he sat there he made up his mind that after today he'd insist on being treated as grown-up as he really was. After a few minutes Tom was called into the office. He breathed a sigh of relief fully expecting that his true status had been verified and he would be back on his way to the school where he belonged. Mr. Lessen invited Tom to sit and explained the situation to him in a well practiced 'talking to a child' tone, “Well Tommy it looks like everything checks out you're officially a fifth grader. Are you sure you weren't just trying to get out of school today?” “Yes I'm sure,” Tom said too exasperated to correct the principal on his name “I was done with the fifth grade two years ago. Call my mom and ask.” “I do intend to speak to your mother, but for now I want to report to your classroom.” Tom shuffled along behind the secretary angrily wondering what sort of grown-up activities the teenagers at Stone Ridge were up to and not paying the slightest attention to her tour of the playground Finally they arrived at the door of Mrs. Sanborn's class. “This is your classroom, now remember that you can always come to the office if you get sick or skin your knee or have an accident or if you just need to call your mom.” Tom groaned inwardly “Accident? Did this lady seriously think there was a chance he'd wet his pants?” “Oh, and I'll make sure we get your uniform ready. You can stay dressed like that today but you'll have to wear from tomorrow on. Have fun” “Thank God, I'll be out of here after they talk to mom.” Tom thought Tom walked inside the classroom and thought he'd gag on the cutesy decorations on the wall. The entire classroom was adorned with cartoon animals an various posters bore reminders of the class rules. Tom just reminded himself that this be for today only and walked up to the desk to introduce himself. “My name is Tom and I...” “Oh Tommy, you must be the new boy. I hear you think you're supposed to be going to Stone Ridge.” “I am. And I only like to be called Tom.” “Well I'm sure everything well get straightened out. We've already got a desk ready for you right over there.” Mrs. Sanborn pointed a desk with a name plate that read “Tommy” in the front row. “I guess we'll have to change the name tag, but that should be good enough for now. All your books are already under your desk.” Tom sat down bitterly in his desk as Mrs. Sanborn called the class to order. “Class he have a new student today can you all say 'hi' to Tom.” Tom rolled his eyes as the assembled brats said “Hi Tom” in a juvenile sing-song unison. “Tom why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself?” Mrs. Sanborn invited. “First of all no matter what this thing on my desk says my name is Tom not Tommy. And I'm only here for today because somebody messed up, I'm supposed to be in junior high.” Tom explained in a loud defiant voice with his arms crossed tight. Tom did his best to ignore the doubting giggles and snickers as Mrs. Sanborn began class for the day. “Now everybody get out your science books and turn to page 75. Tom, since this is your first day I'll give you first try at this question. What are the three basic types of wave function?” Tom blinked. “Wave function?” “Now come on try to remember” Mrs. Sanborn coaxed as all the other students shot their hands into there air eager to answer. Tom sat and tried to remember ever hearing of such a thing all around him the class grew more and more eager to answer, each straining to lift their hand higher than the others. “I don't know” Tom finally admitted. Tom's admission elicited one last round of excited hand waving and calls of “Pick me, pick me.” Mrs. Sanborn looked over the class for a moment “Alright Jessica, can you tell us what the basic types of wave function are. “A complex vector with finitely many components, a complex vector with infinitely many components, and a complex vector with one or more real variables.” Jessica said smiling proudly. “Very good Jessica. Now if you remember yesterday we were discussing one dimensional momentum space...” Tom stared slack jawed at all around him. Everybody in this room, he was convinced, was completely insane. He'd never heard any of this before. Something was very wrong with this town. He hoped that they wouldn't be like this over at the junior high. He sat for the rest of time in complete incomprehension until his teacher announced that it was time for recess. He wondered out to the playground still in shock from the bizarre scene he'd just witnessed. He looked around and realized that everything in this place was for little kids. With nothing else to do he sat on a swing and stared despondently at the ground. As he sat a group of boys walked past him. One of them looked at him and asked 'What's the matter Tommy.” “My name's Tom” he said with a little less conviction than before “and I'm fine, I just want to go the right school.” “You don't even know basic quantum mechanics ” scoffed the largest boy of the group “you should probably be in preschool or something.” With that Tom stood up to face him before noticing he was actually quite a bit bigger. “Come on Todd, leave him alone it's just his first day at school” said one of the group. “Fine” said Todd “I guess we'll just let the pouty baby pout on the swings.” and with that they left. Tom sat back down trying to look as dignified as he possibly could after a fifth grader had just stood up for him. All he wanted at this point was to get through this day with as little notice as possible. The rest of the day in class went much the same as the first. Tom had no idea what was going on, he just knew he wanted out of this place. Finally the last bell rang and he made a bee line for the office where he hoped he'd find that everything had been cleared up. inside he found his mother speaking with the principal. “Hi sweety,” she greeted him “I have good news, Stone Ridge is going to let you transfer and all you have to do is pass one little test. Inside Tom told himself that what happened today was a fluke, he could pass any test they gave him with flying colors. Mr. Lessen gave him his test packet and a pencil and let Tom take the test in the privacy of his office. Tom opened the booklet and his heart sank. If anything this test was crazier than the stuff he'd heard in class today. All of it was completely alien to him. He did his best to struggle through, but all he could do was guess. Once again Tom found himself staring glumly out the the window of his mother's car. Only this time he was officially a fifth grader again. In the back seat sat his brand new school uniform, a simple light blue collared shirt with the school logo emblazoned on the front, a figure of child holding a teddy bear in one hand an adult's hand in the other. Along with the shirt was a pair of slacks and pair of shorts. Tom took some solace in the fact that he didn't have to wear the even more babyish uniform of the lower grades. Still he knew everywhere he went he would be unmistakably identified as the grade school student he now was. And he was beginning to wonder if this really wasn't the place he belonged after all. Chapter 3 Tom strode though the entrance of Stone Ridge Junior High. “Hey Tom” called out one of his friends. Tom joined up with his friends who were already hanging out in the hall discussing the usual teenage stuff. There was some talk of how great it would be once they got their learner's permits which none of them were too far away from getting. Somewhere in the distance there was gentle music. It played so softly Tom didn't so much hear it as sense it. Slowly it grew louder and more distinct, it was now clearly a nursery rhyme. Tom glanced around but nobody else seemed to notice. Eventually it grew to drown out the conversation. Tom stood up and covered his ears, nobody else reacted at all. Tom woke to the electronic screeching of his alarm clock. He reached over and smacked it back into silence, in the quite gray light of morning reality flooded back to him. His new school uniform freshly laundered and folded was already sitting on the chair next to him. He reluctantly went about the business of getting ready for his 2nd day of the fifth grade. He sloped down the stairs and into the kitchen trying his best to ignore his mother's “isn't he cute” looks as he sat down to breakfast “Aww honey, it's not that bad is it?” she finally spoke up. “I just want to go where I'm supposed to go instead of spending all day with a bunch of little kids.” Tom groused. Karen ran her fingers gently through her son's hair “I know you won't like this but you might not be quite as grown-up as you think.” Tom scowled, feeling angry at his mother for making such a comment, but mostly because he was afraid she was right. Somewhere inside him he felt a glimmer of hope that somebody might really know the young adult he was always trying to look like, but he quickly pushed it back down and continued eating his breakfast. Karen rubbed his back “I know it's no fun right now honey, but I think this might be for the best” she said before leaving the room to make a phone call. At Kiddie Town Karen explained the situation to Sarah who had been sure to inform Tom of how adorable he looked in his new uniform. Karen gave her son a good-bye kiss on his forehead and left him again care of Sarah and her staff. A she drove away she wondered if she would ever reach the little boy she knew was under her son's defiant exterior. Tom found his seat from the day before still unhappy to be stuck in daycare but feeling somewhat less conspicuously mature now that he dressed like most of the other children. After a few minutes he heard a familiar voice behind him. “Hey, I thought you said you a big kid.” Tom turned around and saw Johnny from the day before. “I am” John explained “In fact I'm a teenager.” “But you're wearing a Sunny Brook uniform just like me, even though mine is sort of different cause I'm in the third grade.” “Somebody made a mistake I'm supposed to go to a different school.” Tom shot back defensively. “It's OK if you're not a big kid, you can still play with us over there” Johnny said pointing out some of his friends on the other side of the room.” “I don't want to play. Why don't you get wet you diapers with your friends?” Tom snorted derisively. “Fine” Johnny said rolling his eyes. Tom turned back around and blinked. He realized how immature he looked in contrast to the third grader who wanted nothing more to play with him. He shook his head and dismissed it all as a reaction to the stress he was under. At school Tom shuffled back into his classroom and found his desk still labeled “Tommy.” Mrs. Sanborn noticed him staring at it. “I'm sorry I forgot to change that, do you really mind being called 'Tommy' so much?” She asked him. Tom to his surprise found himself answering “no.” It was a battle he was weary of fighting. Mrs. Sanborn smiled warmly “Well Tommy, we're certainly glad to have you stay with us.” As kids filtered into the classroom nobody seemed very surprised to see Tom back in class again. It seemed that the entire world had quite easily accepted him as fifth grader. Class began and Tom could see that this day was going to be like the last. He struggled to gain even the faintest grasp of the material. How could these mere children be so far beyond him? Finally recess gave him a brief reprieve from his classroom struggles. Today the playground seemed like entirely different place. Yesterday he had assumed he just a visitor. But today this was his playground, he was truly under the watchful eye of the adults who kept the students safe and behaved. He sat down again in a swing and watched the goings on. After a few minutes he found himself absentmindedly swinging back and forth a bit. He caught himself and composed himself back into the teenager he felt himself to be making a mental note to only do what little kid stuff was necessary to make it through this situation. The bell signaling the end of recess rang and Tom lined up obediently joined the rest of his class in a neat line as they waited for their teacher to bring them back into class. Mrs. Sanborn took a quick head count of her charges and led them back into class. On the way in Tom became a aware of an urge from his bladder. Not wishing to make the fuss of asking his fifth grade teacher for permission to go he decided to hold it until lunch. But as class progressed the need to empty his bladder became increasingly dire. Finally he was forced to raise his hand. “Yes Tommy?” Mrs. Sanborn acknowledged. “I need to use the restroom.” “Now Tommy you should know by now that your expected to take of that during recess. We only have 15 minutes until lunch and I think you need that time to catch up on your bounded harmonics.” For the next 15 minutes Tom fought his bladder's desperate need for release. When his class finally let out for lunch he made a mad dash for the restroom. There he discovered something very odd. He hadn't noticed before but the button on his pants had a weird sort of latch that had to be worked to open the fly. He sat and stared at it for a moment unable to quite figure out how to undo it. Around him his fellow students ran in and out of the bathroom seeming to have no difficulty at all with this complication. As he struggled he felt his bladder release. A warm wet feeling spread through his pants as he soaked himself helplessly. Along with a sense of utter embarrassment also came a wave of relief and a sense of dread as he realized what he'd have to do. He came out of the bathroom trying to pull his shirt down in a futile attempt to hide his accident. He found his teacher and fighting back tears tried to explain himself. She noticed his wet pants before he could even begin his explanation. “Oh Tommy, couldn't quite hold it dear?” Tom could only shake his head as he followed his teacher to the office. Once there he just looked at the ground while he was led in to see the school nurse. The nurse saw what he was there for immediately “Aww It's OK honey, we'll get you into some dry clothes” she said. “You can come back class when your done here Tommy” Mrs. Sanborn said as she left him in the nurses office. Tom turned to the nurse desperate to explain himself “It's just because of these pants, they've got some weird thing on the button and I couldn't get them off.” he pleaded. He was slightly shocked when she didn't waste a moment reaching over and undoing his button. “You're clothes are just fine. You don't need to make silly excuses hon, little boys have accidents it's nothing to be embarrassed about.” “I'm not a little boy” Tom almost whimpered. “Uh huh” she replied as she helped him out of his wet clothes. Tom blushed deeply as he tried to cover himself. She dumped the soaked things into a plastic bag and grabbed a few things from the closet. “Here you go hon, you can wear these.” Tom sighed slightly as he saw the cartoon print underwear he'd just been handed. He knew he had no choice in the matter so he pulled them on along with a pair of dry pants, this time he noticed these had the same sort of fly. “Thank you” he muttered feeling embarrassed at having been so dependent on her. “Anytime hon.” She said patting his head. “Now go get back to class, I'll call your mom so she'll know to pick up your wet things.” Tom nodded and headed back to class suddenly feeling much more like a real elementary schooler. Chapter 4 After returning from the school nurse Tom spent the rest of the day half eager and half dreading the the end of school. On one hand he'd be able to get away from this bizarre place, but on the other he'd have to explain to his mom why he'd wet his pants. Class ended promptly at 3 and he trudged his way to the parking lot and saw his mother was already there. Drawing a deep breath he climbed into the passenger prepared to defend himself. “Hey hon, have a rough day at school?” His mother inquired sympathetically. “Yeah sort of. But it's not my fault...” “I know it's not your fault, lots of kids have accidents. You just didn't know they don't give bathroom passes here.” Tom was amazed at the way his mother was taking this. It was as though he really was a child who couldn't be fully expected to handle his toileting. He wasn't sure whether he should accept the sympathy or insist on being treated like someone his own age. “I guess you're kind of right.” Tom shrugged feeling relieved to get the issue behind him. All he had to do was figure out how to work that odd little latch. For now he could live with the little kid treatment, and in a strange town where he had learn so many new things he was finding it to be something of a saving grace. Karen smiled at her son and ruffled his hair “That's my boy.” At home Tom flopped down in front of the TV happy to have another day behind him. He knew the cable had been installed that day and was eager to watch MTV and forget about how he spent the day at elementary school. He cycled through the channels a few times but couldn't find anything that looked anything like MTV. “Mom?” he called “Do you know what channel MTV is on?” “The cable company here doesn't have it. Why don't find something else to watch.” Tom sighed and figured he could easily find something else. But he found nothing at all that interested him. As far as he could tell almost all of them were for old people or least people who understood that boring financial talk, a few had weird movies he just didn't understand. Finally he settled on the one thing he could understand, cartoons. He hadn't seen this one before, and he had to admit it he was enjoying it. He'd known kids back at home who still watched cartoons, some were even popular. But he always thought it was all to babyish for him. But here he was and after a long day it was relaxing to just sit and enjoy something. Before he long he once again felt his bladder begin to call for emptying. He waited for a commercial and went into the bathroom determined to figure out that latch that had defeated him earlier. He'd seen the nurse open it so he thought he knew what to do but he still struggled with it. From Tom's perspective it was rather complicated and required quite a bit of finesse. He fought for several minutes as the urge grew. Finally he decided he'd need help. “Uh... mom. I sort of need some help. Please.” He called from the door of the bathroom. “Yes hon?” She said walking up to the door and looking at him curiously. “It's just this button, it's weird. I don't really know how to open it.” Tom blushed as asked like a toddler for help going to the bathroom. Without another word she reached down and effortlessly undid the button. “There you go, is this why you had that accident today?” Tom just nodded blushing a bit more. “Well that's OK, you'll get the hang of it, all the other children do.” Tom finished his business and went back to watching cartoons. He'd already been watching for some time and was becoming hooked. The evening wore on and eventually his mother came in to announce that it was time to get ready for bed. “Mom, it's only 9 O'clock. I never go to bed this early.” He protested. “You've been staying up far too late, and your teacher say you have a lot of catching up to do so you'll need your rest.” Tom sulked but decided not to argue that he was too old for this with the woman who had laundered his wet pants. He went up stairs to his room and began to undress. His mother wasn't too far behind. “Still need help with those pants.” Tom again acquiesced to his mother helping him with his clothes. He unbuttoned his pants and helped him out of them thinking to herself about how cute he looked in the cartoon print underwear. “You need any more help hon?” she asked. “No I can do the rest.” Tom said feeling a bit embarrassed. “Alright, I put some pjs on your dresser if you want to wear them, it's going to get pretty chilly tonight. Good night sweety.” “Good night, mom.” Tom said as she left the room. He'd given up wearing pajamas some time ago and preferred to sleep in his underwear. Not the underwear like he was currently wearing, he changed out of that, but pajamas were one of the many things he'd felt he'd outgrown. He turned out the light and climbed into bed. After a a few minutes of tossing and turning he realized that it wasn't just chilly it was freezing. No matter how he piled the covers he was still cold. He got out of bid and slipped on the pajamas his mother had left for him. Luckily they didn't have any cartoon characters on them or anything like that. But they were warm and cozy. Tom climbed back into bed as comfy as he could be and quickly fell into a deep sleep. Chapter 5 Tom made his way through another morning at Kiddie Town and sat though another bewildering day of class. He couldn't understand how these little kids could know so much more than him, how they could be so much more capable than him in so many ways. Unable to follow the day's lessons his mind kept wandering back to the day before and how he'd wet his pants just because he wasn't able to do something everybody else found so simple. These thoughts became more intense when he once again began to feel the need to go the restroom. The last thing he wanted to do was have an accident for the second day in a row so he sat and thought about how he'd finally undo that stupid latch. At last it was time for recess and he bolted for the boy's room. He examined it for a minute. He'd seen it worked several times now and had a pretty good idea of how to do it. He made several attempts making some progress, but the mechanism was ultimately too delicate for him. He sighed deeply and walked out to the playground. He found his teacher and looking at his shoes stammered “I think I sort of need some help.” “What do you need Tommy?” Mrs. Sanborn asked. “I just need some help undoing this fly.” Tommy said barely above a whisper. She bent down close so she could hear him “What was that dear?” Tommy again whispered into her ear and she briefly gave him a surprised look. “OK, let's get that taken of.” She followed his into the restroom and easily helped him with his predicament. All the while she was careful not to hurt his feeling but Tom could tell from the way she looked at him that she was beginning to think he didn't even belong in her class. He finished up hoping that nobody had witnessed anything. At the end of class that day Tom started for the door when he heard Mrs. Sanborn call his name. He turned back around and went up to her desk. “Tommy, I have a note here for your mother. Could you get her to sign it and bring it back tomorrow?” Tom took the envelope and nodded. He had some idea of what was in it, but he knew he had little choice but to give it to his mom. Not wanting to deal with it right after school he shoved it deep into his backpack and went out to her car. “Hey sweety, did you have a better day today?” She greeted him. “Yeah” Tom said shrugging his shoulders. “I'm have to head by the mall for a bit, wanna come with me?” “Sure” Tom said. Tom listened to the radio and watched the scenery go by and began to forget about having to ask his teacher for help going to the bathroom. The car pulled into the mall parking lot and Tom gawked at how huge it was. He was sure there'd be plenty of things for him to do that would let him forget about being an elementary schooler for a while. Inside the mall was incredibly crowded. Tom was surprised that such a small town could produce so many people but was to interested in finding an arcade to care very much. “Hey mom can I go look around, I'll meet you back here in an hour.” His mom gave him a skeptical look and for a moment he thought she'd say no “Alright, but be back in half an hour instead” she said before handing him some money to play around with. Tom was thrilled, finally he was getting a taste of teenage freedom. He got a large soda at the food court and began to look around. He spotted an arcade and walked confidently over to it. But when he got inside he paused. He got out a dollar bill and got some tokens from the machine and began to look around for something to play. But as he explored he noticed that the other teenagers were looking at him like he was an invader. He realized that because of his uniform everybody there assumed he was just a little kid who'd probably throw a damper on the fun they were having. It probably didn't help that he was so much smaller than any of them. He was always a bit shorter then average, but these kids simply towered over him. He did his best to ignore them and just enjoy his time away from adult supervision. He found one of his favorite games from back home and popped in a token. For the first few seconds it was the same game he was used to. But this version was harder somehow. He'd always been able to play for what seemed forever on one quarter, but this time he was dead in under a minute. He stared at the death screen in shock. From somewhere off to the side a kid not much older than himself chuckled “Don't worry kid I wasn't very good at that when I was your age either, you'll get better.” Tom was about to inform him that he was not some little brat when he heard the voice of the attendant behind him “Excuse me son, is your mom here?” Tom turned around to face him bewildered that he'd be asking such a question “No, she's out shopping. I don't need her to be with me every second.” He answered. “Well you need her here, we don't allow anyone under 12 without a parent.” “But I...” Tom thought for a second and decided that admitting to being a teenager in elementary school wasn't what he wanted to do and that nobody would believe him anyway. He sulked out of the arcade and went to wait for his mom. As he waited he began to feel the effects of the large soda. He decided to wait until he got home where he could at least try to work that cursed latch in private, or worse yet ask for help again. He was about to give in and go search for a restroom when his mom appeared. “Hi hon, have fun?” “Yeah I guess” Tom said before hesitating for a moment “I really need to go to the bathroom and I think...” “Still need some help with that?” Tom nodded as his face turned red. “Well come on.” His mother said before leading him off in the direction of the bathroom. The crowd had grown quite thick and Tom struggled to keep up with his mother. He felt more like a little kid than ever before trying so desperately to stay with his mom but he didn't know what else to do. Eventually the task became so difficult that she reached out her hand for Tom to take. Knowing he had little choice Tom took her hand. He took some small solace in the fact that none of his friends from back home were here to see him being led by the hand so his mom could help him go to the bathroom. They turned a corner onto the main concourse of the mall where things were even more crowded. Tom couldn't even see where he was going, he was now simply being dragged through the throng. He felt a bolt of panic as his mother's hand slipped out of his. He tried to go around to get back to where he thought she was but he just got pushed back further and further. His need to go to the bathroom was now beyond desperate and there was little he could do to even find his way let alone undo his pants by himself. Unable to hold it any longer Tom felt his bladder release uncontrollably and the warm wetness spread through his crotch and down his leg. Looking down at his soaked pants Tom began to feel like nothing more than a lost little boy. Tears flooded into his eyes and finally some people in the crowd took notice. “Hey are you lost” a voice from behind him asked. Tom turned around to find a girl who was maybe somewhere toward the end of her high school years leaning down at looking at him sympathetically. Tom could only sniffle and nod. “Well let's get you somewhere where your mom kind find you and get you into some dry pants” his new caretaker said as she took his hand. Still lightly sobbing Tom didn't know what else to do but comply. He was led over to a nearby information booth where the girl explained she'd found a lost child. After getting his name and description the attendant at the booth made an announcement and within a few minutes Tom's mother appeared. “Oh baby, I'm sorry I let go of your hand. I'll make sure that never happens again” she exclaimed as she bent down to give him a hug. Forgetting himself for a moment Tom returned the hug and rested his head on her shoulder taking comfort in his mother's arms. “And don't worry about hose pants. It's not your fault. Well get you into something dry at home.” She thanked Tom's teenage rescuer for finding her boy and taking his hand in a firm grip led him back out to the car. At home she took him upstairs and helped him out of his wet things. “I want you to know that I'm not angry at you in any way. But you are going have to figure out how to undo your pants on your own. I just bought you a new bunch of pants and everything they sell here has the same thing.” Tom nodded as he got himself into the dry clothes his mother had laid out. “Now go ahead and watch your cartoons. I'll get all this in the wash for you.” Tom couldn't believe how understanding his mother was. He couldn't believe how much he was beginning to fit the role of little boy that had been thrust on him. But he didn't want to think about any of that now, he just wanted to watch some cartoons and forget about the day. Upstairs his mother couldn't help but notice an envelope sticking out of his backpack. Chapter 6 As Tom sat down to dinner with his mother he could easily see she wanted to talk about something. “I saw that note from your teacher” she said casually. Tom's stomach turned. He'd completely forgotten about it. “What did it say” he stammered trying to act as unconcerned as possible. “Well she said your well behaved and that you try hard” she said sparing Tom the comments about how adorable he was “But she thinks you might not be ready for her class.” That was exactly what what Tom had feared. “But I'm not even supposed to be in her class” Tom said exasperated. “Now honey, we both know the test they gave you showed you had some catching up to do. Mrs. Sanborn says your really struggling with what the other children are learning. And maybe if you had a little less pressure you could learn how to undo your pants. ” Tom sank into his chair. “Can't I at least have a little more time to try?” he pleaded. “She wants to have a parent teacher conference tomorrow. We'll talk about it then. And you know I won't let anything happen that's not in your best interest right?” “Yeah, I suppose” Tom acknowledged as he glumly went about finishing his dinner. But as he sat he felt a new sense of determination. Like never before he was committed to figuring out that hated latch and proving to everybody he really was grownup. Suddenly feeling buoyed he sat his plate in the sink and ran up to the room to begin. He sat and struggled for several hours. Several time he almost gave up but he knew this was his last chance to prove that he didn't need to be sent to an even lower grade. Finally he did it. He knew it was odd for a 13 year-old to feel proud about being able to undress himself but he couldn't help it. Quickly he buttoned back up and tried again releasing the latch with little trouble. Like a proud toddler he called his mom in to witness his new found skill. “I knew you'd get it. Maybe that will help convince the school to keep you in the fifth grade.” His mom said patting his head. Tom would have ordinarily resented being patted on the head in such a manner but he was far too happy to care. And when his mom reminded him that it was nearly his new 9 O'clock bedtime he didn't feel any need to protest. His simply got into his PJs by himself and went to bed finally feeling at least a little grownup. At school the next day Tom was still confused by the lessons but he was beginning to think that if he could figure out the latch he could figure out this stuff too. Even when class ended and his mother and the principal came in to discuss his future he felt very confident. Tom took a seat next to his mother and waited as the adults exchanged greeting. “Now down to business” Mrs Sanborn began “One of my biggest concerns is that Tommy doesn't seem to be able to handle undressing himself to use the restroom.” “But I figured it out” Tommy interrupted. He stood up and began to demonstrate his new found skill. He felt a little ridiculous doing this in front of three people but he know it was necessary. But something was wrong, he did exactly what he did the night before but the latch didn't come undone. “I did it last night, I don't know why it isn't working. Maybe it's broken or something” He said feeling a bit of panic. “Tommy hon” Mrs. Sanborn said “They all work differently. Every pair has it's own combination if you want to call it that. And most of them have a little computer chip in them that rearranges the way it works every day.” Tommy looked at her like she was insane. “But why? Why do they even put these on here?” Tommy could only keep looking at her in shock as she went into an explanation he could barely understand. All he could manage to figure out was that it had something to do with promoting neurological development. Tommy fell back into his chair wondering how he'd ever figure out all the different latches, especially when some of them even changed. He barely paid attention as the three adults went about discussing his readiness for the fifth grade. “Well” the principal said “What I'm going to do for now is put Tommy in the third grade and we'll see if we need to something more drastic.” “Third grade?” Tom said in disbelief “Can't you just send me back one grade?” “Don't worry you'll have a chance to work your way back” the principal reassured him “But as part of that we're going to expect you to take care of your own clothing. We think in a setting were your won't struggle so much with school you'll be able to learn to handle that on your own.” On the ride back Tom barely spoke a word. In the back seat sat his new uniform, a similar shirt with a pair of short pants and suspenders. The shirt had the name “Tommy” sewn neatly into it. His mother was clearly thinking hard about something and that suited him just fine, he didn't want to talk about this anymore. Suddenly he noticed she was turning into the parking lot of the local supermarket. “Mom” he finally spoke up “Can't we just go straight home today?” “I'm just going to get one thing, now come along with me.” “I'm just going to stay in the car and listen to the radio.” “Don't you remember how you got lost in the mall? I just want to keep a close eye on you.” Tom sighed and got out of the car. As he began to step out into the traffic lane he felt her grab his arm. Looking up at her and noticing the seriousness in her face he quickly acquiesced and took her hand. Inside the store he paid little attention to where his mother was going as he followed her and nursed his wounded pride. Finally she stopped and he looked up at the bright packages lining the store's diaper aisle. He watched in silent horror as his mother placed a package boy's Pull-Ups into the cart. “Mom please” he began to plead not thinking how he was clearly identifying himself as the intended wearer “I promise I'll try really hard, I don't need to wear diapers.” “These aren't diapers honey, I don't think you need those yet. But I can't have you coming home in wet pants every day.” He opened his mouth again to protest but was cut short. “I've already made my decision. As soon as you show that you can use the potty you can wear underwear again.” He began to speak again but quickly thought better of it. “Do you understand?” She asked. Yes.” Tom replied meekly. “Good boy” She said stroking his head. “I have a feeling this will work out in the end.” Chapter 7 When they returned home they both went straight to Tom's room to get him into his training pants. After being helped out of his pants Tom quickly grabbed a Pull-Up from the open bag. He was in no hurry to start wearing them but he at least wanted the dignity of putting them on himself. He looked at the brightly colored thing he held in his hands and a bevy of cartoon characters smiled eagerly back at him. He didn't recognize any of them but they were clearly meant to appeal to preschoolers. “The little stripe goes in back.” His mother helpfully pointed out. Seeing no reason to delay further Tom pulled his brand new pants into place. They weren't like real underwear the way the ads said. They were obviously thicker. Tom try to reassure himself that this wasn't a diaper, but he knew it was close. His mother held out his pants for him to step into. “Now I'm not going to help you with this anymore except for getting you dressed. You'll learn how to do it yourself, you just need to try. And if you have an accident just let me or the school nurse know and we'll help you get into a new Pull-Up. OK?” Tom couldn't believe the words he was hearing. It was his Pull-Up and he was going to need help from grown ups changing into a new one. He could only nod his acquiescence. “Good boy. Now go watch TV and I'll get dinner ready” giving him a pat on the bottom. As dinner approached his bladder began to strain. He'd made a few attempts at the button but quit in frustration. Now the need was getting dire. He walked the the bathroom, every step felt like it could shake loose the flood gates. He struggled again, twisting and pulling at the strange device. But control slipped away from him. This time there were no wet pants, just the damp heaviness of his training pants. “Tommy, dinner's ready!” He no longer took note of the name. How could he tell his mother he'd wet his Pull-Up after just a few hours of having it on? He crept into the kitchen still unsure what to say. “Hey honey. How's your Pull-Up doing?” she asked with an unnerving amount of casual directness. “Oh... It's still fine.” Tom said looking down. “Are you sure” she said trying to catch his gaze. “Yea...Yeah” She crossed her arms and looked him directly in the eyes “Do I have to check?” “Alright, I sort of had an accident.” “I thought so. Let's go get you into a dry one.” She began to lead him back to his room. “You need to tell me if you have an accident. You could get a rash if you don't changed soon enough.” Once in his room he was relieved of his shoes and pants. “Dry as a bone” his mother commented as she quickly inspected his pants. “Looks like we won't have to worry about leaks.” Tom started to remove his Pull-Up. “Oh honey let me get that, you don't know where to put it” she lowered the sodden thing and helped him step out of it before tossing it in a pail that had taken up residence near his bed. “I'm sorry sweety, I forgot to buy wipes hold on a sec'. She left for the bathroom and returned with a wet cloth in hand. “Mom, please let me do this” he pleaded. She thought for a moment and handed him the cloth. “OK, but if I notice you aren't cleaning up well enough I'm going to do it myself.” Tom breathed a sigh of relief and washed himself as thoroughly as he could manage before stepping into a new Pull-Up and getting dressed again. He went downstairs again for dinner and tried to content himself with this one measure of maturity he was still allowed. Eventually his bedtime came and all he could think about was getting out of his new juvenile underpants. He rushed to remove the Pull-Up on his own as his mother dropped his clothes in the hamper. “Is that dry” she asked as he walked over to the pail. “Yes, it's totally dry” he said. She leaned over and took it from his hand. “Just let me see” she said gently but with a pronounced sense of maternal authority as she took it from his hand. “Yep, dry as can be. Good job” she said as she deposited in the pail. “Why don't you try to go use the potty before bed OK?” “But mom, I don't need to. And would you stop saying potty. Just cause I've had a few accidents cause of these stupid buttons...” She raised an eyebrow and Tom relented. Without any impediments he was able handle his business on his own for once. When he came back he found his mom holding another Pull-Up. “Mom, I don't need one of those. I don't wet the bed. I just have accidents sometimes.” “I want you to wear one at night for a while just in case. Especially if you're going to be so unwilling to use the potty before bed.” Tom moaned again and slid himself into his nighttime Pull-Up and got into his PJs.. He was tucked into bed with a good night kiss and drifted off to sleep. Chapter 8 Tom could hear his mother already up getting things ready for the day as he slowly came awake. He felt the still unfamiliar snug padding beneath his pajamas and recalled the previous day. As he reached down to feel the front of them he found himself dry and wondered how he'd come to even doubt it. The door slowly opened and his mother peeked in. “Good morning sweety, did you sleep OK?” “Yeah I guess.” “Good” she sat down as his bed “Still dry?” “Of course” Tom said almost managing to sound like nothing else could have even crossed his mind. “Good boy” she said softly ruffling his hair “I just wanted to explain a few things about today since there's a lot of new things happening. I'm going to put some of your Pull-Ups in your backpack. When you get to school I want you to go to the office and give them to the nurse, she'll keep them in a cabinet for you. After that one of the office ladies will show you where your new classroom is. Do you think you can handle that by yourself or do you want me to go with you?” “Mom, that stuff is really simple. I'm not really some little kid. I can handle it.” “Of course your a big boy” she said chucking him under the chin “I just want to make sure your comfortable with all these changes.” “Thanks mom, but I'm sure I can do it on my own.” “Just remember you can have the office call me if you need anything. Now get a shower and I'll get your clothes out.” Tom grumbled to himself as he got out of bed. “And remember to put your Pull-Up in the pail.” Seeing that she wasn't going anywhere he got out of his PJs and dumped his training pants in the pail. He saw her watching closely to make sure it really was dry. The shower gave him a rare few moments of privacy and independence. He had a small shower radio that hung from the nozzle. He turned the knob until he zeroed in on a faint and distant station playing something that sounded like what a teenager ought to be listening to. He closed his eyes and tried to take it all in. But somehow it seemed wrong, like something from a place he didn't belong. He turned off the shower, grabbed his towel, and returned to his room. He found his mother waiting for him with his new school clothes in her lap. “I almost forgot” she said “The latches on these need to be done when you put them on too. It's supposed to help more with neurological development. It's not supposed to help as much in the later grades so they use a different kind.” Tom stood in shock as she held out his Pull-Ups for him to step into. “You mean you're going to get me dressed too?” “It's not a big deal honey, it's just until you learn how to do it yourself.” He sighed and put one foot and then another into his training pants and his mother soon had him in his brand new school uniform. “You look nice” she smiled as she made a few adjustments. Tom looked down at the hopelessly juvenile clothes he'd just been helped into and wondered what his friends back home would think. Even as a real third grader he'd never had been caught dead in short pants and suspenders. “I look like a baby” he complained. “No you don't. Those are perfectly fine clothes for a lit...” she cleared her throat “I mean big boy. You just have to get used to them is all.” Later that morning he was again dropped off at Kiddie Town Daycare. He slumped into his usual seat and glared at the floor. “Hey Tommy” shouted an excited voice. He looked up and saw Johnny smiling at him once again. “How come you're wearing one of the younger kid's uniforms?” Johnny asked “And how come you never told me your name before?” He asked pointing at the name stitched in his shirt. “I'm wearing this because... well because the teachers are all stupid. And I didn't tell you my name because I don't want to be friends with a big dumb baby.” Johnny rolled his eyes “I was just asking some questions, jeez.” Tom looked down again feeling a bit embarrassed by his outburst. He looked up again and saw Johnny walking back to rejoin his friends. He thought almost spoke up again to apologize but held back. In time his bus came and took him to back Sunny Brook. He walked into the office and up to the desk. “I'm supposed to give some stuff to the nurse and then I have to go to a... uh... different class room.” He explained. “Oh you must be the boy whose going into the third grade. Tommy Welton right?” Tom just nodded “Yes, could I just see the nurse and get this over with please?” “I'm sure you're excited to get to your new class dear, but there's just a few things we need to do first” She took out a form from beneath her desk. “Now what is your P.A.T. Number?” Tom look at her dumbfounded “I don't even know what that is.” “Oh a big boy like you must remember that.” She said expectantly. Tom just shook his head. “See if he has one of those big yellow cards” suggested one of the other secretaries “They usually give them to the Kindergarteners but he may have one too.” “I don't have one of those. Can't we just do this later?” Tom pleaded. “We can just skip that part for now” She looked further down the form “OK, are you a N.E.C.P student?” Tom blinked “I don't know what that is either.” The secretary just shook her head a bit “That's OK hon, we'll just call your mother. She'll know all this. Just go have a seat over there.” She said motioning to a row of seats behind him. Tom sighed and sat down. His legs dangled from the enormous chair as his mom was called to take care of the process for him. He didn't understand much of what they talked about except for the part about how cute he was in his uniform. After a few minutes she hung up the phone and walked over to him. “There we go hon, all taken care of. Your mother asked me to make sure you didn't forget about your pullups.” Tom gasped a bit “She told you about that?” She smiled bemusedly “It's no big deal. Just hand them to me and I'll take them over to Nurse Carlson.” Tom sighed and tried as discreetly as he could to retrieve them from his backpack and hand them over. He watched as she went a short way down the hall and sat them down on a table just outside a door. “Debra” she called into the room “these diapers are for Tommy Welton. I'll just leave them right here.” She walked back over to him “Now let's get you over to Mrs. Taylor's class.” Tom trotted along behind her wondering if he'd even be able to make it as a third grader. Mrs. Taylor's class was just getting underway when they came through the door. “Sorry we're late, we had a few details to go over with his mom.” she explained. “Oh you must be Tommy” the tall and slightly graying woman at the front of the class beamed “We were waiting for you. You can have your seat right next to Johnny and we'll begin.” Tom looked over at the empty seat right next to the kid he only knew as some persistent runt from the daycare. He took a breath and sat down. Johnny smiled and whispered “Hey, maybe we can be friends after all.” Tom just ignored him. “Class this is Tommy Welton. He's new here and I want you all to give him a good welcome. You're in luck today Tommy. We're going to be going over gravitational lensing which should be review from the second grade so you won't have much catching up to for today.” Tom could only stare as an elementary school teacher once again patiently explained concepts that he couldn't even grasp, every now and then she'd jot some alien word on the blackboard. “Now” she said with one firm clap of her hands “I think we're ready for a little pop quiz.” As the children around him groaned in disappointment Tom began to panic. He didn't want to be sent back any further but he was sure to be found out as having no idea what was going on now. As the quiz sheets were passed around the room he could only hope that it would at least be a true-false quiz. But when they pale blue sheet landed on the desk in front of him he didn't even know where to begin. He sat, pencil in hand, frozen. While the teacher turned her back to help another student he felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around to see Johnny discreetly tilting his already completed quiz toward him. He quickly jotted down the answers and sat down his pencil just before Mrs. Taylor turned back around. The quizzes were collected and Mrs. Taylor went to her desk to grade them, instructing the class to begin reading chapter 9. Tom leaned over and whispered to Johnny “Thanks. You really saved my life. I'm sorry about being mean to you, I'm just sort having trouble with teachers and stuff.” “No problem” Johnny whispered back “Wanna play at recess.” Tom hesitated but he decided it might be for the best to just try and fit in. “Alright, I guess I can see what you guys do around here. Johnny beamed “Cool.” Once recess came Johnny led the way out a series of squares and circles painted on the blacktop. They soon joined by two other boys Tom recognized from his new class. “Tommy, this is Scott and Kyle. We usually play Boxes and Circles at recess.” “I don't think I've ever heard of that” Tom said. “Oh it's really easy” Johnny said before launching into a long and intricate explanation. “Oh OK” Tom said scratching his head. “I guess I can try to learn.” “Great, just ask if you get confused we all play this a lot so we can help.” Tom stepped into one of the squares as he was instructed and watched some of the initial play before the ball came bouncing his way. Thinking he'd gotten the hang of it he jumped to catch it. “No catchies” explained Kyle “That's minus five points for Tommy.” The rest of recess went on in much the same way with Tom losing points and the other boys displaying obvious patience for their new playmate. By the time the bell rang he was far behind, despite his wounded pride he felt relieved to have finally had a little bit of fun and make friends. Even if he was being treated like an interloping little brother he felt like he was beginning to find a place here. As he sat down at his desk he realized he'd been so focused on his game he hadn't noticed his growing need to use the bathroom. It was nearly an hour and a half to lunch and he already very much needed to go. He hesitated at first but as the strain in his bladder grew and the clock slowed he raised his hand. “Yes Tommy, do you have a question?” Mrs. Taylor said pausing her lecture. “I really have to go to the bathroom.”Tom nearly begged. She thought for a moment “We usually expect our students to tend to themselves during recess but I'll let you go just this once.” Tom thanked her and quickly walked to the door. Outside he began to run as fast as his overflowing bladder would allow but this time he didn't even make it to the end of the hallway. He'd nearly forgotten abut his Pull-Up, now it was sodden and heavy, there was only enough dampness to remind him of his accident. He paused and thought. If he went to the nurse right away everyone would surely know something was wrong, Mrs. Taylor might even ask what took him so long in front of everybody. He waited a reasonable amount of time and walked back to class. When the lunch finally came he nearly sprang from his seat in his eagerness to get out of his clammy training pants. “Hey Tommy” called Johnny “Don't you want to eat lunch with us?” Tom turned back around “Oh yeah! I just have to do some... stuff first. I'll see you guys in a few minutes.” Johnny just shrugged as Tom sped off to the office. He paused at the nurses door. She was busy refreshing her supplies. She was obviously younger than most of the staff, though still very much an adult to Tom's eyes. Tom stood and watched her. He struggled to find the words he needed to say. Before he could say a word she caught him at the edge of her vision and gave him a energetic smile “Hey there Tommy” She said bending down to face him at eye level. “Did you have another accident hon?” she said sympathetically. “Yeah, kind of.” She put a hand on his shoulder “Well let's get you into something dry then.” She walked over to a drawer on the other side of the room, retrieved one of his Pull-Ups, and sat it down on the examination table. “Do you need some help with those pants?” She asked. Tom just nodded and she effortlessly undid them and pulled them down to his ankles. She began to help him out of his wet Pull-Ups. “Do you like the Cartoonimals?” She said noting the design. “Huh?” “You know The Cartonimals. Cartoon animals. Lots of kids around here watch them every day.” “Oh uh, my mom just sort of picked them out for me. I didn't even know what they were.” “Well they're very cute” she said as she pulled out a fresh wipe. “I do that myself” Tom interjected. “I was just thinking I should talk to your mother about that” she said as she cleaned her new patient with expert care “You're already getting a little red. She might be a little more thorough.” she tossed the wipe into a nearby waste basket. “Don't you feel better already.” Tom nodded bashfully. “I thought so” she said holding out the fresh pair of training pants. She helped him back into his clothes. “There you go, all nice and dry.” She adjusted his suspenders and stood back up “Now don't forget to come here as soon as you have accident. I don't want to have come checking up on you.” “Thanks. I will” Tom stammered. “Now go play with you friends.” She shooed him out the door. He rushed to join his friends at lunch. “Hey Tommy. Your just in time” Johnny said “We were just talking about Hegelian dialectics. Scott says that negations come from outside the matter being discussed. I say that they're inherent and internal. What do you think?” Tom looked back and forth between them blankly. “I uh... agree with what you said” he nodded and said to Johnny. He picked over his lunch while the others continued their discussion. He felt like a little kid at a grown-up dinner party. As the afternoon wore on Tom couldn't believe how much he had to catch up on just to be in the third grade. Hardly anything made sense to him. When class was finally dismissed he quickly began to gather his things so he could escape and at least have a chance at enjoying the weekend. But Mrs. Taylor called him over to her desk. “Tommy, I can't help but notice you looked a little confused today. Are you having trouble keeping up with the class?” “No, it's just that there's some new stuff here I didn't learn before.” She nodded “I thought that might be the case” she reached into a drawer beneath her desk “We usually use these in the lower grades but it might help.” She sat a brown teddy bear down on the desk. “This is an Interactive Learning Teddy” she explained “It comes loaded with some games to help you learn some of the more basic material. And it even plays lessons while you sleep. It's very effective. I've already talked to your mother and told her all about it. She sounded very excited about trying it.” Tom stared at the toy for a while. “Well I guess I can try” he said said resignedly. He picked it up and tried to put in his backpack but it wouldn't fit. So he thanked his teacher and made is way to meet his mother, teddy bear clutched firmly in his hand. Chapter 9 Tom climbed into the passenger seat and started to toss his things in the back while his mother greeted him enthusiastically. “Hi honey! Where did you get the teddy bear.” Tom sighed “Mrs. Taylor gave it to me” he said flatly “It's supposed to help with learning or something.” His mom retrieved it from the back seat and admired it for a moment “Well that was very nice of her. You'll have to think of a name for him.” She handed the bear back to her son. “One of our new neighbors invited us over for dinner so we'll just go home real quick before we head over there.” “Do I really have to go too? Couldn't you just order a pizza for me or something?” She began to pull out of the parking lot “There's no way I could find a babysitter in time. You'll be fine.” “But I don't need a babysitter.” He said as defiantly as he could. The car came to a stop at a red light and she looked him right in his eyes “Honey, even if I thought you were big enough you'd still need somebody help you if you have an accident.” Tom tried to stammer a response. “If your a good boy tonight we'll go see a movie. You can even pick” “Alright” He acquiesced. Karen smiled and mussed his hair. “I knew you'd come around. They have a teenage daughter, maybe you two could play video games or something.” Tom arrived at the Lyndens' front door with his face freshly scrubbed and hair neatly combed courtesy of his mother's tending. She rang the doorbell and reached down to adjust his bangs once more. “You look very nice.” Mrs. Lynden greeted them both at the door and ushered them inside As they entered the dining room room Tom wondered why his mother had mentioned the daughter but not the younger child for whom a a bright red plastic booster seat had been set up at the far end of the table. “I've set up two places for you and Tommy over there” Mrs. Lyndon said pointing towards the childish thing. Knowing he was expected to be on his best behavior Tom stifled his complaint and tried to settle himself into his designated seat. Without a word he felt his mother's hands at his sides lift him up the last little bit and place him in the booster before sliding the chair back into place. The floor was now well out the reach of his dangling feet and he realized he'd need help again to get down. As this helpless situation dawned on him he looked at the place setting in front of him. Among the neat white plates and shiny silverware sat his plastic plate decorated with some now familiar cartoon characters. Mrs. Lynden saw his surprise and smiled. “Nurse Carlson at your school is a very good friend of mine. We just happened to be talking today and she said how much you like the Cartonimals.” He wanted to protest that he hadn't even known what they were until she pointed them out on his pull-ups. But that wasn't a topic he wanted to bring up. “Thank you.” he managed. “That was very thoughtful of you Susan.” His mother said as she sat down. The doorbell rang again and Mrs. Lynden excused herself to answer the door. “You being very good, just keep it up and we'll go see that movie tomorrow.” Karen said. Mrs. Lynden brought two more guests into the living room. “Karen, Tommy this is Bill and Theresa Burnette from down the street.” She turned to the new arrivals “And this is Karen Welton and her little boy Tommy.” The adults exchanged hellos and Bill, a heavy-set broad-shouldered man with thin graying hair gave Tom a soft playful punch on the shoulder “How you doing there slugger? Enjoying your new school?” “It's fine I guess” Tom replied trying to avoid the subject. “Haley” Mrs. Lynden called up the stairs. “Everybody's here. Would you mind helping me set the table.” A poised confident looking girl came in and graciously introduced herself. She was probably only a few years older than Tom but, but in contrast to his early grade-school uniform, had dressed for the get together in appropriately formal but still fashionable for a teenager clothes. After another round of introductions she went into the kitchen to help her mother bring out the food. With everybody settled in dinner was served. Almost everything was well out of Tom's reach so his mother prepared his plate for him and sat it down. Conversation around the table mostly drifted around adult topics that had little understanding of or interest in though Haley kept up with them quite nicely. Once dessert was out of the way Mrs. Lynden announced that coffee was avalable. “Tommy, we have some video games you might like. Do you want to go with Haley while you chat some more?” Eager to escape the boring adult chit-chat and hangout with somebody around his won age he nodded enthusiastically. As his mother pulled his chair away from the table he avoided anymore assistance by jumping down out of his chair. “Looks like somebody's excited to get some playtime” Mrs Burnette observed “Sorry about boring you with our grown-up stuff honey.” Tom followed Haley down the hallway and into a spacious room with a couch and some beanbag chairs arranged around a TV. A small chest brightly labeled “toys” sat in one corner. “I thought you guys didn't have any other kids here.” Tom said looking puzzled. “We don't. This is just where my mom and I watch the kids we babysit.” Haley replied as she sat down on the couch and picked up a magazine. “All the video games are in the basket next the TV, you can play whatever you want.” “But I thought...” Tom looked back at her engrossed in her fashion magazine. He realized she wasn't here to hang out with him, he knew his place in this arrangement. With a sigh he sat on the brightly colored carpet and turned on the video game system. He didn't really care what was in it. Just that it would distract him from his predicament. As it turned out he'd started something called Floppy Bunny's Big Adventure. He'd never heard of it before and the cutesy graphics didn't seem appealing. This was obviously just a game for little kids but he tried it anyway and became engrossed. He struggled at first but slowly adapted to the challenge. The urgent prodding of his bladder went almost unnoticed. Tom suddenly become aware of the direness of his situation and shot to his feet. “Where's your restroom?” He asked, straining to keep himself dry. “Oh just down the hall” Haley answered “You don't need any help, do you?” Tom barely gave it a thought, he couldn't bare asking for help from somebody who should have been his peer. He took off quickly down the hall and began the familiar struggle with his buttons. It was to no avail though, and his training pants were once again the only thing keeping his pants dry. He sulked out to the dining room and whispered in his mother's ear. She stood up and retrieved her purse from beneath the table. “Excuse us for a second, we just have a little something to attend to” she said as she began leading Tom back to the bathroom. Once again he was stripped down to his pull-up. She kept a calm demeanor but Tom could tell that constantly getting him undressed was beginning to be a chore. He wondered if a new solution might be in store. She pulled a baby wipe from her purse. “The school nurse said you might need some help with this sweety, so stand still.” Tom hung his head slightly while he was cleaned up. Next she retrieved a fresh pull-up. “Now I only brought one spare. So we should probably go home soon.” The lingered at their neighbor's house only a little while longer. Karen thanked her hosts their hospitality and thanked Haley for her help as well. She and Tom headed back home. When bedtime came around Tom was helped out of his clothes. His mother started to get a night time pull-up ready for him but he couldn't help but protest. “Mom, I was dry all last night. Please. Just let me try one night without a pull-up.” She paused an looked at him. “Well you did wake up dry. And you were a very good boy tonight at the Lynden's.” She thought for a moment “OK, we'll try going without a pull-up tonight.” Tom breathed a sigh of relief “Thank you, thank you.” He gave his mother a big hug. She smiled and patted him on the back “But you have to sleep with you bear tonight, that's going to help you at school. And if you're wet in the morning I don't want any more complaining about wearing a pull-up at night. Understand?” Tom nodded “I promise” and pulled his PJs up. He was finally feeling like a big kid again. He took his bear and placed it next to his pillow before climbing into bed. “Good night honey, sweet dreams.” She said as she turned out the light. “Good night mom.” As he lay in the darkness he could hear a strange soft humming coming his teddy bear. It was like nothing he'd heard before but soft and soothing. Before long he had drifted into a very, very deep sleep. Chapter 10 In his dreams Tom walked through a forest beside a babbling brook. He came a a clearing and found a large wooden table stacked with candy. At the head of the table was his teddy bear. “Come Tommy. Sit with me.” He felt almost like he was floating right into a chair besides his teddy. Everything was vivid and real. He could even feel damp grass beneath his bare feet. He looked down and saw he was wearing his pajamas. “Where am I?” he asked. “You're in Teddy Bear Forrest of course” said the bear. Tom glanced up and saw clouds forming in the sky. He started to get up. “No you need to stay here” said the bear. “The more time you spend here the better you'll do in school. Here have some tea.” The bear reached over and poured some tea into a cup that has suddenly appeared. He poured it to the very top of the brim and small trickle ran down the side. Before Tom could say another thing the clouds above him opened up and he was drenched by the falling rain. His room was bright and sunny. He could hear his mother coming from down the hall. For a moment he couldn't understand how the rain had gotten inside, how it had soaked him in his bed. But then he remembered. The door opened and his mother stepped in. “Good morning hon, how are you doing?” Tom just looked down at the wetness between his legs. “I'm sorry mom. I really tried.” “Oh no.” She said as she sat down on the side of his bed and embraced him. “It's OK baby, it's not your fault. Just go get showered and we'll talk about what movie you want to go see.” “Tom's mood brightened slightly “You mean we're still going to do that?” “I don't see why not. Now go get cleaned up and I'll take care of your sheets.” Later as she pulled into the movie theater parking lot Karen asked one last time “Are you sure you want to see this movie? It's supposed to be really scary.” “Mom, I can totally handle it. I'm not really some little kid.” “We can still go to the Floppy Bunny movie, Haley said you really liked that video game.” “You said I could pick the movie and I want to see Ghost Invaders.” “OK, but if you start getting too scared I'm marching you right out of that theater.” They bought their tickets and Tom strode confidently to his seat. All he had to, he thought, was sit through one dumb movie and he'd convince his mother that he wasn't a total baby. This lights dimmed, the film rolled, and the screen came alive with images more vivid than he'd imagined. Theaters back home weren't like this. The movie wasn't 3D but he could almost swear the pictures were coming off the screen. Every rustle of leaves, every footstep, every sinister growl sounded like it was right behind him. He could almost feel the breath on the back of his neck. Without thinking about it he sought out his mother's hand to hold his own. In his horror he inched closer to her, instinctively seeking her protection. Finally he couldn't bare to look at the screen any longer and buried his face in her shoulder. Suddenly he felt himself lifted from his seat. Gentle hands cradled his back and bottom before his feet finally found the ground again in the brightly lit lobby. “It's OK baby it's just a movie” she said stroking his chin. “I know. It was just really... scary I guess.” She wiped the fearful tears from his cheek. “Do you see why I thought Floppy Bunny might be better?” He nodded. “How's your pull-up doing? Did you have an accident?” Tom became aware of a familiar dampness. “Maybe” Karen took her son's hand and led him to the baby changing room. Tom was still too shaken to do anymore than go along. She lowered his pants and checked his pull-up. She began untying his shoes. “I'm sorry Mom” He said “I just wanted to show you I wasn't a baby” “I know you want to be a big boy” She replied while she helped him out of his pants.”But just remember that it's OK to be little too.” She cleaned him up and got him back into dry pants. “I have few errands I need to do. Do you feel OK enough to come along? We could get stop at the ice-cream place at the mall if you'd like.” Tom nodded “That sounds OK.” “Come on then.” She took his hand and they walked back the car. The mall parking lot was packed. Tom remembered their last visit and looked around nervously. “Don't worry” his mother said while she searched for a place to park “I'll make sure you don't lost again.” She found a spot at edge of the lot and opened the trunk. Tom watched as she retrieved something from the trunk, unfolded it, and sat it on the ground in front of him. He couldn't believe what he was looking at. She rolled a stroller back and forth a few times to get the wheels straight. “Hop in sweety. I'd like to start shopping before the lines get any longer.” “But that's for babies.” Tom said incredulously. His mother adopted a patient but slightly sterner tone. “It's for children who have trouble keeping up with their mothers. You remember what happened last time right?” “Yeah, but...” Tom stopped himself. It was just getting harder and harder to argue that he could by in this strange place without being treated the way he was. “I'm know how this must look to you but I also know this is better for you. If we have to turn around and go back home there will be consequences.” Without further protest he settled himself into the stroller. It wasn't awkward and uncomfortable like he'd expected, instead he was nicely accommodated among the babyish designs of the stroller. “I knew you'd be a good boy. Let's go get you some ice-cream.” Securely within his mother's charge Tom was pushed into the thronging mall and to a small ice-cream stand near the entrance. He really just wanted to make as few stops as possible, but he couldn't pass up the scoop Triple Chocolate Fudge he was offered. He ate greedily, enjoying the treat so much he nearly forgot his situation. And with the rich desert settled satisfyingly in his stomach and the steady pace of his mother's pushing he began to feel drowsy. His stroller came to a stop outside a clothing store. His mother knelt down beside him with a baby wipe in her hand and cleaned a stray bit of chocolate from the edge of his mouth. She saw the heaviness in his eyes, she smiled and smoothed his hair. “You can have a little nap if you want honey, I'm just going to be shopping for a while.” She resumed navigating her son through the crowd as he slowly felt himself drift off to sleep. He heard his mother's voice somewhere nearby as he came back to reality. “I've thought about it. I'm just not sure yet. It would be a lot easier than taking off his pants every time though.” “I'm sure you'll make the best decision for him.” An unfamiliar woman's voice answered “Either way he's simply adorable in his little stroller.” He opened his eyes and glanced around. He was parked next to his mother in a small cafe. The unfamiliar voice belonged to an happy looking round faced woman. “Look who's waking up.” she said “Hi there Tommy, your mother and I have just been chatting.” His mother looked over at him. “Hon, this is Mrs. Kerner, she lives in our neighborhood.” Tom squirmed a bit, realizing the women had been talking about him. “Oh, uh... hi.” “Are you still dry?” his mom inquired. “I think so.” “Are you sure? You were out like a light?” “Mom I only wet the be... I mean I'm sure.” “OK then, I won't check as long as your sure. I think it's time to start heading home now anyway.” Karen paid for her coffee and said goodbye Mrs. Kerner before taking Tom back out to the car and driving back home. Tom went straight to his room and flopped onto the bed. He'd hoped a weekend away from school would be a chance to be his own age for two days. But he just kept getting treated like a little kid everywhere he went. Worse than that it all seemed necessary. Absentmindedly he began fiddling with a button on the front of his teddy bear. It's eyes lit up and a speaker hidden within emitted a soft happy song. “Would you like to play the Algebra game with me?” chirped the bear. Tom turned the bear over, looking for someway to start the game. After a minute he looked around to make sure nobody was watching. “Yes” he almost whispered into the bear. “Oh good” said the bear “I've been waiting a long time to play with you.” Tom found the answer and response style of the game immediately intuitive and, for once, the subject matter was something he was at least a little bit familiar. He became engrossed that he didn't notice his mother at the doorway. “Good to see you enjoying your teddy.” Tom tried to compose himself “It's OK. I was just sort of bored I guess.” “I was just going to remind you to try using the potty. You haven't had an accident yet have you?” Tom's eye's widened and he sprinted past his mother and to the bathroom. Even without the disadvantage of his button being to difficult for him it would have been nearly too late. Fatefully he had another accident. He returned to his mother to get cleaned up and changed. “You can stay up a little while longer” she said tossing his pants into the hamper and starting to help him with his shirt. “But it's getting close to your bedtime so I want to get you into your jammies now.” With the sun barely down Tom was dressed in his night clothes. He spent the rest of the evening watching TV until he was tucked into bed after having his Pull-Up checked and found dry. His mother turned out the light on her way out and darkness fell across his room. Memories of the movie flooded back. Every shadow seemed to be a ghost and the world beyond his darkened window was cold and foreboding. He took his teddy from it's place near his pillow and held it against his chest. As though sensing his fear it began to play a soft soothing lullaby. He hugged it tighter. Chapter 11 After a second night of teddy inspired dreams he woke up wet again, this time protected by his training pants. It became a familiar pattern over the next few days. Tom felt himself slipping further and further towards babyhood and it seemed like he could do nothing about it. One evening he noticed his mother searching the Internet for diaper sizes. On Wednesday morning Tom walked into his third grade class to find Johnny and some of his classmates discussing a new arcade that had opened not too far from school. Everybody, it seemed, had gotten permission from their parents to go after school. “Hey Tommy are you coming too?” Johnny asked. “I don't know” Tom said hesitantly thinking of being stuck alone in his Pull-Ups. “Come on, at least ask if you can come.” A light came on in his head. This was a way to demonstrate maturity. He could just make his way without any grown-ups around and then they'd all know he was really big. No more holding hands, and certainly no more strollers. He nodded “OK I'll call her at recess.” The day's baffling lessons hardly seemed to matter anymore. His plan was in place. He Johnny, and some other kids would walk a few blocks to the city bus stop, ride just a few stops and visit the arcade. He could almost hear his mom telling him how wrong she'd been. At recess he went to the office with Johnny and Kyle in tow and asked to call his mother at work. “Hey mom” he began “Me and some friends want to go to a new arcade after school. Can I go?” “That sounds like it would take an awful lot of responsibility Tommy. I don't know if...” “Please” he begged “I won't be alone or anything.” He heard her inhale deeply “OK. But only for half an hour, I'll pick you up there. And you have to stay with you're friends the entire time. And you absolutely have to go to the nurse before you leave, even if you don't feel wet I want her to make sure.” They were restrictive terms but they were more freedom than he'd had in ages. “Thank you mom.” Tom gushed “I promise I'll do everything you said.” The rest of the day seemed to glide right by as Tom imagined what other new privileges he'd soon be winning for himself. After the bell rang his group began to make their way to the bus stop. Tom tried to think of an excuse to run to the nurses office but nothing came to mind. He resolved to keep up with his group. He'd only had a small accident, and it was only going to be a half hour. At the stop Tom peered at the vast array of signs, tables, and maps. “Are you guys sure you know where you're going?” He asked. “Of course” Kyle replied “We don't even have to change buses.” “Yeah, I guess it is pretty simple” Tom said nervously as he resolved to try to follow his friends as closely as possible. The bus rolled up and his friends quickly squeezed themselves into the crowded vehicle. Tom searched for a spot but couldn't even find a place to stand. “Just get on the next one” Johnny suggested “It's just a minute. We'll wait for you.” Tom gulped and stepped back down to the empty bus stop. He watched his friends wave as the bus thundered off. He looked around and briefly contemplated walking back to school to call his mom again but he wasn't even sure of the way back. As his panic rose another bus lumbered to a stop. Still feeling lost and confused he climbed on and a took a seat. The bus shuddered away from the stop and immediately took an unexpected turn. After a trip of what seemed like miles Tom got off at the next stop and scrambled to find the bus back. The signs offered nothing but a tangle of arrows, dots, and numbers so he just got on the next bus that seemed to be going the other way. But soon he was riding through completely unfamiliar streets. His half-hour of freedom came and went and he was still desperately lost, his bladder bulged again. He no longer cared at all about the arcade he just wanted to be at home with his mom. He decided to abandon his attempts at navigation while he searched for a restroom. He found one near the entrance of a park and darted in. He fumbled with his button briefly but soon the familiar sensation of wetness came gushing. His already wet Pull-Up could hold no more and soaked the front of his short pants. He stepped back outside, tears already in his eyes. As the sun began to sink below the horizon he sat down on a lonely bench, put his head in his hands, and cried. He heard a car come to a screeching halt and looked up. “Tommy! I've been looking everywhere for you!” He heard his mother exclaim as she ran from her car. “Mommy!” The word simply burst out of him. They embraced each other tightly. “My baby, I was so worried. Nurse Carlson called to say you hadn't come by. So I went to the arcade and couldn't find you. I'm just happy you're OK.” “I'm sorry mommy” the word came out again through heaving sobs “Please don't be mad.” “I'm not mad baby, I shouldn't have let you have so much responsibility. You should have gone to see Nurse Carlson before you left but” she looked at the wet spot running down his school uniform “That really doesn't matter now.” She sat down on the bench and patted the spot next to her “There's a few things I want to explain to you.” Tom sat warily down next to her as she put an arm around him. “Tommy, I know you've been trying very hard but I don't think you're ready for your school yet.” anticipating a protest she put a finger to is mouth “Now just listen. Mrs. Taylor says you're still having trouble with your lessons and she thinks your friends are helping you with your quizzes.” Tom looked down. She'd seen right through it all along. “From now on” She continued “You can just stay at Kiddie Town until I come pick you up. They have lots of toys like your bear and the teachers there can you learn some of the same things.” “You mean you're sending me to preschool?” Tom gasped. “Tommy, be honest. Do you really think you can keep up with everything your third grade friends are doing?” Tom thought about the days events and about how he always seemed to be just tagging along. “I guess not” he admitted. “And there's one more thing” she said broaching a long unspoken subject “You haven't been having a lot of luck making it to the potty and I've noticed that you're getting up to go later and later.” “But I can keep trying” He stammered She shook her head. “Honey. Training pants are for children who just have accidents sometimes. They're really hard to change and their expensive. Now before I went to look for you at the arcade I went out to the store and when we get home I'm going to put you in a diaper.” “A diaper?”He looked back down at his pants and his protest softened “Do you really think I need them?” She hugged him “I'm afraid so honey. Are you going to be a good boy and come with me so we can get you out of those wet things?” Tom looked down at his wet pants and thought of the trouble his disobedience had caused him. He sniffed and nodded “OK mommy, I'll be good.” She smiled at him warmly and gave him a big hug. “Let's go home.” After a short drive home Karen walked through the front door with a paper bag full of diapering supplies in her hand and her son following closely behind. “Come on” she said as she led him upstairs. She sat the bag down on his bed and went straight to his dresser to retrieve some dry clothes. “Now just sit down and I'll take care of everything.” Tom sat on his bed and felt his sodden Pull-Up squish wetly beneath him. He just wanted out of it. His mother sat the clothes down next to him and got a pale green package of diapers from the bag. She opened it and light babyish aroma wafted though the air. She pulled out a single diaper and sat in on top of his dry things. Tom studied the baby animals designs playing across its front, he never thought his Pull-Ups would seem so grown up. A bottle of baby powder was placed next to it. She undid his suspenders, lifted his shirt over his head, and instructed him lie back. She slid off his shorts and tossed everything in the hamper. Finally she removed his Pull-Up and disposed of it with a thud in the bin. She took a few wipes and made very sure he was all clean before cracking open the bottle of baby powder. Tom just watched, he was amazed at how much quicker and efficient the process seemed now that his mom was handling it all. She spread a thin layer of baby powder all over him and at last picked up and unfolded the diaper. “Just lift up a bit baby.” She slid it under his bottom, made a few quick adjustments, and taped it snugly into place. She started grabbing his new clothes. “Now I don't expect you to try to get to the potty anymore, but if you know you're wet you should let me know right away.” He nodded. At least in resigning himself to this he'd be relieved of a cumbersome and frustrating responsibility. They both went down stairs and had dinner. Afterward they sat together on the couch and watched TV. He was home, he was safe, and he things he could no longer look after himself were being tended to. It was hard to understand why he'd fallen into this role so easily. He could only wonder what lay ahead. As he pondered these thoughts the weariness of the day began to creep in and he fell asleep on the couch beside his loving mother. Chapter 12 In the morning Tom was changed out of his soaked night-time diaper and helped him into his third grade uniform again. He'd be getting a new preschool one today his mother promised. His mother got him to Kiddie Town early and began the process of officially enrolling him in preschool, specifically the class they referred to as The Little Ducklings. The Little Bunnies class was reserved for children who'd been successfully potty trained. “You're both very lucky today” explained the secretary “We just had a new spot open up in Ducklings.” While Tom waited for the adults to wrap up their business Johnny spotted him. “Hi Tommy” he chirped “Sorry about you getting lost like that. We just thought you'd be able to use the bus since you're kind of a big kid an all.” “That's OK.” Tommy said “It was really my fault I guess. I should have just gone home.” “Do you still wanna play with us? We've got some really fun ideas for recess today.” Johnny offered. “I can't.” Tom looked down and heaved a sigh as he made an admission “I have to stay here instead of going to school with you guys.” A look of realization crossed Johnny's face “Oh, so you're going to be in preschool now.” He paused “You might be a little less confused than you are in our class. They teach really simple stuff like algebra. And the teachers are really nice. And you won't have to keep going to the school nurse to get changed.” Tom looked back up in shock “You know about that?” Johnny shrugged “Sure, why else would you keep going to the nurse's office like that. Especially since you always did it after you asked to go to the bathroom.” Tom stammered. “It's OK” Johnny replied casually “Maybe we can play after school. That's when they let you preschoolers out to play with us big kids.” “Uh sure. I guess.” Tom said still stunned. “OK then, see you later” Johnny said as he bounced off to the big kid's room. Tom turned back around just as the adults finished with their business. “This is Mrs. Hansley” his mother said motioning towards a young blonde woman “She'll show you around and help you get your new clothes on.” “Hi” Tom offered as he tried to assess the new situation. Mrs. Hansley knelt down “Hi Tommy, we have lots of fun things for you to do here. Just say bye to your mommy and I'll show you your new classroom.” He exchanged a good-bye hug with his mother “Be a good boy” she patted his bottom “And don't worry about getting to the potty. Just let the ladies know when you need a change and we'll see about getting you back into big boy pants later. OK?” Inside Tom winced, he wondered if it was too late to protest this change in status. He'd felt so scared and vulnerable on that park bench that he would have agreed to nearly anything. He wanted to ask her to reconsider, but before the words came he was watching her walk out the door. “Don't worry hon” Mrs. Hansley as she took his hand and led him through door that separated the preschool section from the the regular daycare “She'll be back to pick you up at the end of the day.” Two doors where on opposite sides of the hallway. On the right was one decorated with a cartoon rabbit, and the left was a happy cartoon duckling. One small boy was being led from the duckling room to the other. “Good job getting potty trained Andy” Mrs. Hansley addressed him as they passed. Andy smiled back and followed his new teacher through the open door. On the other side of the Little Bunnies room Tom could see into a small bathroom. The door shut behind Andy and he turned to look into his new classroom, several changing tables lined the wall. Tom's preschool teacher retrieved a pair of shortalls and a striped shirt from a nearby counter. On the bib of the shortalls was a picture of the same duckling that was on the classroom door, a comically large pin held its diaper in place as it smiled eagerly. “Now let's get you ready for school and I'll show you all the fun things we have here and the other teachers.” She began untying his shoes and Tom took a moment to look around. He was surprised by how calm everything seemed to be. All the children were happily absorbed in toys or painting or being tended to by one of the other teachers. Something about it seemed welcoming. Once he was down to his diaper Mrs. Hansley casually slipped a finger just under the leg gather before moving to getting him into his shortalls. Tom looked around again, one group of children was watching a cartoon that seemed familiar. Once he was securely in his new preschool outfit Mrs. Hansley quickly took out a small pen-sized device and twisted it into the buttons on his shoulder straps and two other snaps on the front of his pants. “What was that?” He inquired. “Just a tool for grown-ups, don't worry about it.” She answered patting his head. She showed him around the various parts of the classroom. There was an area with a toy box, one with a TV, some tables setup for painting, and a playground outback where the preschoolers could play as long one of the teachers was supervising. “You can do whatever you want for now” she explained “But everybody has to be quiet for storytime, and then lay down for a nap.” Two other teachers Ms. Kelly and Mrs. Peterson moved about the room observing things and occasionally shuffling one of their charges off to the changing tables. With a pat on the bottom Tom was dismissed to find something to do until storytime. He looked back to the TV, something about the cartoon was familiar. He walked over to the group of children gathered around and watched for a moment. Then it dawned on him, these were the Cartonimals everybody had kept bringing up. They were currently involved in comical explanation of simplifying an algebraic expression. Tom recalled the subject from his old school. But this was different, somehow he was interested. Without giving it a second thought he sat down cross legged on brightly colored carpet Soon he was laughing along with his preschool classmates and swaying to the the simple songs. He never noticed the dire urgency of his bladder until it was already giving way. In a moment he realized he was sitting in a wet diaper in the middle of a preschool watching a kid's show, but he couldn't pull himself away. Mrs. Peterson, an experienced preschool teacher, somehow suspected. As she walked by she quickly reached beneath Tom's shortalls. “Jessica” She said to Ms. Kelly “We have a wet little guy here. Would you mind?” “Of course not” she replied. Tom looked between them in shock. Ms. Kelly knelt down beside him a put a hand on his shoulder. “Don't worry, I'll just put you in a dry diaper and you can go right back to watching your cartoon.” She took his hand and led him to a changing table. “Do we really have to do this out here?” Tom said. “Where else would I change your diaper silly?” She replied as as she set a disposable mat onto the table. “It's just that the school nurse before changed... I mean helped me out of my pull-ups in her office.” Ms Kelly smiled “Don't worry sweety, we have everything we need to change your diapers here too” She said motioning to a neatly stacked box of powder, wipes, and other supplies “Just let us grown-ups worry about stuff like that” “No I mean” Tom stammered as she hoisted him up onto the table. He could see his protests would go nowhere. Nobody would see him as and different than an everyday preschooler. She gently pushed him back onto the padded surface. Then she unfastened his shortalls and quickly went to work. “So you really must like the Cartoonimals, you've been watching them all day.” “Yeah they're kind of interesting I guess” Tom replied. “Do you want to try something else after we're done. Maybe try some of the toys?” Tom shrugged “Sure.” With a fresh layer of baby powder applied and a new diaper in place his pants were snapped back up and he was taken to the opposite corner of the room were toys of every description filled shelves and boxes. Ms. Kelly gave him a pat on the bottom and left him to play among the other preschoolers. Tom settled down next to a small toy train set. He looked around for the engine and found a pile gears, wheels, and parts. He scooped them up in his hand, he could almost see how they were supposed to go together. He began playing with the pieces, trying different arrangements. Finally he worked out a configuration that seemed to work. He flipped a switch and all four wheels began to turn. A smile grew across his face. He sat his new train down on the track and he watched with open delight as it ran around the track. Soon another boy sat down next to him and picked the train up. “This makes it faster” he said before taking out a few gears and rearranging them. He put the train back and it took off faster than before. Tom realized that there must be many more combinations. He couldn't wait to try more. But before he could pick the train up again Mrs. Peterson was calling everybody for story time. Tom reluctantly left his train behind and sat down on the edge of the group gathered around Mrs. Peterson's chair. Today's story, she announced, was Spaceman Simon and the Three Laws of Motion. The title reminded him of something and as he listened to Mrs. Peterson's slow sing-song reading he remembered hearing about this once, something about the scientist who'd gotten hit by an apple. It never interested him, and he never understood it. But in the story of Spaceman Simon it was something he could understand. He leaned in closer to see the pictures and Mrs. Peterson turned the book around to show everyone. Mrs. Hansley began passing out sippy cups to all the children. Tom almost balked but decided to try it, it was warm and sweet. He drank some more while he sat and listened. He finished his cup just as the story came to an end. The teachers began moving everybody into the nap room. Tom paused in the doorway and looked at the rows of cribs crisscrossing the room. “Can't I sleep on a mat or something” Tom asked Mrs. Hansley as she walked by. “Oh these are lot more comfy than some old mat” she said before getting an idea. She grabbed a stuffed rabbit from a nearby shelf “Here you can have this stuffed bunny if you're scared. And one of us teachers will always be in the room.” She smiled and handed him his stuffed rabbit before giving his diaper a quick check and hoisting him into a nearby crib. “But I'm not scared, I just...” “That's good” she said giving his head a quick pat “Just lie down and try to sleep.” Tom sank down to the mattress, rabbit still in hand. Mrs. Hansley pulled his blanket over him. “Good boy” she said softly “after all that playing and starting a new school you need some rest.” She slid the crib's railing into place and moved on to other children. In a few moments the lights were dimmed and lullaby began to play over unseen speakers. Tom laid there and realized he was tired, very tired. The crib's mattress seemed perfect. His blanket was soft and warm. And the music, the lulaby was simple but so deeply soothing. He wondered why he'd wanted to take a nap anywhere else. He closed his eyes and fell alseep. He awoke again to Mrs. Hansley standing over his crib. “Did you have a good nap?” She said not even waiting for an answer before she checked his diaper. “Let's get you over to the changing tables.” She helped him out of his crib and took him back to the main room where the other two teachers were busy changing the last of their student's naptime diapers. Tom could only wait before Mrs. Peterson finally came to tend to him. Once he was in a dry diaper and back on his feet he scanned the room for something to do. His new favorite toy was already being played with. He sat down next to it anyway, just to observe. To his surprise his new new classmates, Mike and Sammy, welcomed him and he quickly joined them in building and playing with new trains. His new friends introduced him to other toys. There were toy robots, cars, and puzzles. Tom could hardly tear himself away from any of them. He barely noticed the hours slip by until he heard his mother's voice from across the room. He looked up from his toy car and she waved him over to where she was talking with Mrs. Hansley. Still enthralled with all the new toys he'd found he rushed over to her “Hi mom, I was just playing with this cool car thing.” he quickly began enthusing “You can build the engine for it and everything. It's really cool.” She looked at him with bemused surprise “Well I'm glad you had such a good time. Mrs. Hansley was just telling me what a great addition you are to the class.” Tom looked down in embarrassment at his display of enthusiasm and tried to shift into a more mature bearing. “Yeah I guess it was alright.” But a peek back at his mother and teacher sharing a knowing look told him it was already too late. Karen turned back to Mrs. Hansley “How did he do about letting you know when he needs a change?” The experienced preschool teacher dismissed the whole idea with a wave of her hand “We can work on that when starts getting ready to train. Until then we're happy to just let him play.” “Oh, well I guess I won't worry then either.” Karen said as she gave her son's head a gentle stroke. “You said you had something for us to take home.” “Yes” she retrieved a brightly colored book from her desk “This is a coloring book we give all our students. We don't really have lessons here but we do try to instill some of the basics. Tommy can go through this at his own pace, it has some puzzles and games that teach basic algebra, geometry, that sort of thing.” “Thank you, seeing how he liked his day here I'm sure he'll have fun with this too.” She looked back at Tom “Say 'thank you' to your teacher sweety.” Tom accepted the book and took a moment to examine the picture of young children among giant algebraic equations. “Thank you, Mrs. Hansley” with more than a trace of genuineness. With that his mother took his hand bid his teacher good-bye and led him out the door. He looked back as the door shut and couldn't believe he wanted to go back. Chapter 13 Tom sat cross-legged on the living room floor with his new coloring book sprawled out in front of him and a fresh red crayon in his hand. He puzzled over one of the first pages. “Help Farmer Jim put his Periodic Sheep in order of atomic weight” the text at the top cheerfully suggested. The TV sat silent, he'd shut it off after seeing another ad for Ghost Invaders, his coloring book suddenly seemed more inviting. In the kitchen his mother was having a tense phone conversation. He began absentmindedly coloring the barn while he contemplated what he was to do with this puzzle. Across the hall his mother's conversation came to a halt. She walked into the living room and sat down with a sigh. She looked over at her son and Tom froze assuming he was in some sort of trouble. But her wearied face turned to a smile. “Already starting your coloring book huh?” “Yeah, I was just bored is all. I'm trying to figure this one out.” “Well come over here, maybe I can help.” Tom gathered up his coloring book and took a seat on the couch. His mother smiled again. “Not there silly” she said as she lifted him onto her lap. She chuckled at his evident surprise. “It'll be easier to help you here” she said brushing his hair lightly before putting her arms around him and taking the book in her hands. Tom settled into his new seat, relieved he wasn't the cause of his mother's distress and pleased he seemed able to relieve it somehow. She examined the troublesome page for a moment. “I bet there's a periodic table somewhere in here.” “Isn't that the chemical thing?” Tom asked “I haven't learned that yet.” “Well that's what this is for” she said thumbing quickly through the book “to help you learn new things.” She came found what she looking for and pointed out one of the numbers. “This chart shows all the elements and their atomic weights” she explained patiently “Each one of the sheep has letters on it that tell you what element it is. Like this H means that one's hydrogen. You just have to look them all up and see which one has the largest atomic weight and put a one next to it, and then do the others in order.” Tom nodded partly understanding “I get it. But what does all that mean” “I'll explain while you work on the sheep” she said and reached over to retrieve a box of crayons from the coffee table. They worked their way through a few more pages. Tom hung on his mother's words and when she praised him exuberantly for every right answer he felt like he'd won a Nobel prize. “Thanks mom, that really helped a lot” Tom said as he shut the book and began to get up. “Thank you for making me feel better” she said pulling him back into a hug. “What was that phone call about?” “Nothing you need to worry about.” She noticed a sogginess as his weight shifted “We should go out to eat tonight. But first I think you need a change.” She let him down and he began to leave. “Just stay right here” she said as she retrieved a diaper-pin patterned mat from nearby. “I don't see any reason to go upstairs every time you need a change.” She laid it out and began gathering all the necessary diapering supplies into a neat row while Tom resignedly laid himself down in front of her. He wondered how much his own behavior was contributing to this casual attitude about his diapers. Did he really seem like that much of a baby? She worked swiftly and his shortalls were being fastened over a fresh dry diaper before he could complete these thoughts. Together they walked out to the car and started their way to a nearby restaurant. Venturing out into the world beyond home and the colorful walls of Kiddie Town made him more acutely aware of his uniform. The night-time air was cool on his legs, he grateful his diaper was warm and dry. He knew by now that to everybody else his age was defined by the clothes he wore so he was prepared for the hostess's broad smile and careful tone as she welcomed he and his mother. Her question surprised him though “Will he need a highchair tonight?” she asked. “No” Tom answered emphatically for himself. Still she looked to his mother for confirmation. “No thank you.” She said lightly. They were shown to their table and Tom was left with a children's menu a complimentary sippy cup of juice. Karen smiled at the special treatment her adorably shortall-clad son was getting. “I hope things like that don't bother you too much.” “It's OK. I'm sort of getting used to it.” “That's good to hear. I think I'm getting used to it too. Getting to hold you in my lap again really helped after a long day.” Tom's cheeks burned slightly “I had fun too I guess” “Good, I really hope you enjoy this time as much as I do.” Tom looked at her with a bit of surprise “You mean you don't mind having to... do all that extra stuff.” She shook her head emphatically “My biggest job is take care of you when you're too little to do it yourself and I enjoy doing it.” “But I'm not really...” “Honey, some day you'll be ready to go back to school, but for now I really hope you can accept this and enjoy being my little guy.” Tom blushed redder but he felt good knowing his mother saw things that way. Karen noticed a small smile growing on her son's face “After all you had fun at preschool today didn't you?” Tom squirmed a bit “Yeah, it was fun I suppose.” “Well keep having fun and maybe it will all get easier.” They continued chatting over dinner. As Karen left her money on the table on got up to leave she quickly checked Tom's diaper. “You're fine for the ride home” she said and then she thought for a moment “You know I saw a toy store just across the street. If it's still open we could go in and get you something. Maybe that car you were playing with today.” Tom was deeply tempted but he couldn't quite go that far “No thanks mom.” But his mother could see the way his eyes had lit up “OK, but let me know if you want a new toy and we can go and pick something up.” The next morning Tom was laying on a rug at preschool absorbed in a Speak-n-Say. He pulled the cord “Apoapsis is the highest point in an orbit” a happy voice chirped from within. He looked through rain washing over the classroom's windows to elementary school school kids trudging to their bus. Inside the teachers were distributing a morning snack along with sippy cups of milk. Tom took his and surveyed the classroom while he enjoyed his treat. He noticed that Cartoonimals had already started playing so he wandered over to take a seat. Olly Otter was elaborating on square numbers to Gavin Giraffe, who though he was the tallest and implied to be the oldest of the group was most often the recipient of these lessons. Tom settled in and finished his snack. As the show drew to a close he found himself in the mood to try something new. He walked over to the art section and took a seat. Where he expected to find simple ordinary finger paints or maybe some crayons or brushes there was instead a thumb sized pen with several buttons and dials on its surface. He picked it up and examined it. Around him the other children where using them with unconscious ease. Tom shrugged and decided to figure it out on his own. He pressed the largest button, nothing seemed to happen. He turned a dial, still nothing. Finally he tried the next largest button, the pen vibrated for a moment before firing a giant stream of green ink across the front of his shortalls. Ms. Kelly was soon by his side. She took the pen from his hand and surveyed the damage. “Oh sweety, you should have asked one of us for an apron before you started. We're going to have to clean you up.” Tom could only look at himself in horror. We wondered if there was something even lower down the chain than preschool in store for him. Ms. Kelly saw his reaction and patted his head “Don't worry. You're not in trouble it's just a little mistake.” She led him over to the changing tables and undid his shoulder straps and lowered his shortalls to the floor. She then removed shirt leaving him standing in nothing but a diaper. “Oh dear” she said “It looks like it soaked through.” Tom looked down at himself. If his cartoon-animal print diaper didn't make him look like a toddler then the messy smear of paint across his chest certainly completed a certain picture. Ms. Kelly sighed and turned to consult with Mrs Peterson for a moment. “I think I'll have to give this guy a bath. Can you cover for me for a few minutes.” Mrs. Peterson nodded and Ms Kelly thanked her while she gathered Tom's clothes and took his hand. She led him to the other side of the classroom and through a door to a small tiled room. Here a bathroom for the teachers was apportioned with a tub, apparently for situations such as these. For a moment Tom was relieved to be in relative privacy but as Ms. Kelly began to draw a bath he realized what she had in mind. “I can do this myself” he protested “I always do it at home.” “I'm sure you can do lots of big boy things” Ms. Kelly said patiently as she reached for his diaper “But this is hard to get off, just let me do it and you can go back to playing.” Tom dodged her hand with a step back “Just let me try.” Ms. Kelly adopted a sterner tone “Does somebody need corner time? I'm sure your mommy wouldn't be happy to hear about how cranky you're being.” Tom froze. He thought about how happy his mother had seemed with him the previous night. Somehow the threat of punishment didn't seem as bad as disappointing her. “OK” he said reluctantly. He was quickly relinquished of his diaper and helped into the warm soapy water. He was immediately struck by strong pleasant aroma of the bath soap. Something about it was so soothing, so disarming. She began to scrub his thoroughly. Though he could barely discern it there really did seem to be a technique involved in removing this paint, he could only sit while her expert hands did the work. “Boy you really splashed yourself. Hasn't your mommy taught you to use an ArtPen?” Tom shook his head “No, I never even heard of it before.” “I could show you how after you're all cleaned up, does that sound good?” Tom nodded “Yeah, that sounds OK” As he got out of the tub she wrapped him in a giant fluffy towel and began to dry him off. “There we go” she said as she inspected her work closely “all cleaned up.” She hoisted him onto the a nearby changing table and got her newly clean charge into a fresh diaper. From somewhere beneath the table she produced a simple baby blue onesie “You can wear this while we wait for your clothes to get out of the washer.” She said as she pulled it over his head and snapped him into it. “Oh, thanks” Tom said. At least he wouldn't be wandering around in nothing but a diaper. They emerged back into the classroom just as everybody else was assembling for story time. Tom was surprised to find himself glad he hadn't missed it. The day's selection was Bubsy Beaver Meets the Colorful Chloroplasts. Tom couldn't help but be aware of being much more thinly dressed then everybody else. His onesie was snapped snuggly between his legs and made him more aware than ever of his diaper. But as Mrs. Hansley began reading he hung on every word. After story time the children where again ushered into the nap room. While Tom was considering renewing his protests of the day before Ms. Kelly swept him into a crib and raised the side rail. “Don't worry your clothes will be ready when nap-time is over” she tried to reassure him. Mrs. Hansley came by with familiar toy in her hand “Tommy here just gets a little anxious without his bunny. Don't you sweetheart?” she handed him the same stuffed bunny he'd slept with before. Tom again resigned himself to settle into his crib as the lights dimmed and a soothing lullaby played over unseen speakers. As he drifted into sleep he noticed a faint glowing from the corners of his crib. He barely had time to wonder what it might be before he was asleep. Tom sat in his living room surrounded by a bevy of toys. He had his teddy bear and his stuffed bunny both close at hand as he fiddled with his toy car. His mother came in and stroked his hair while she sat down next to him. She joined in with him, helping him assemble a new engine for his car. It all seemed so normal and easy, he was happy to have his mother by his side. Then he was standing beside a crib in his own room while she helped him into his PJs. She kissed him on the forehead and offered him his stuffed animals before lowering the rail. We awoke to Ms. Kelly standing over his crib with his freshly washed uniform in hand. “Come on sleepy head” she said “I'll get you back into your clothes and you can go play.” Back at the changing table Tom was changed out of his soaked diaper and dressed in his uniform once again, cleaner and well powdered for the journey. “Do you still want to learn how to use an ArtPen” Ms. Kelly offered. Tom shrugged “Sure.” Ms. Kelly led Tom over to the art area and got him into an apron emblazoned with the same duckling logo that was on his shortalls. She handed him one of the strange devices and took one for herself before kneeling down beside him. She began to go over each button and dial in slow and patient detail. Soon he was drawing crude lines of his own, only getting a small amount on his apron. Before long a picture was taking shape. The only thing he could really think of at the time and the only thing he could manage to draw with this unfamiliar technology. Two stick figures, representing his mother and himself, stood happily in front of a red house with smoke rising from the chimney. He knew it was childish but he was proud to have learned something new. Ms. Kelly took a moment to praise her student. “Good job, I bet you're mommy will put this right on the refrigerator.” She carefully curled the paper into a tube and put it in a small cubby labeled “Tommy.” Tom busied himself with the toy train for the remainder of the afternoon. Soon he heard his mother calling to him from across the room. She greeted him with a hug and pat on the rear “Mrs. Hansley says you have something you want to show me.” “Yeah, I guess I sort of do” Tom said blushing slightly but excited to share his new talent with his mother. Mrs. Hansley handed him the sheet of paper and he opened it. “Awww that's very sweet” She exclaimed causing Tom to blush brighter. She put a hand on his shoulder “It's very good Tommy, I'm really proud of you for learning new things.” Tom thanked her and they hugged again. “You smell really nice too, that was good of Ms. Kelly to help clean you up” She commented. Tom blushed again and couldn't help but wonder if baths would be a part of his future as well. They both said their farewells to Tom's teachers and left hand in hand. “I'm going to put this up on the refrigerator” She promised. Tom smiled bashfully. Not so long ago the idea would have been unbearably embarrassing. But he knew he'd made his mother happy, and for now that felt better than anything else. Chapter 14 Tom awoke to the sound of his mother preparing breakfast below. He held his teddy against his chest nestled in the curve of his body. He'd gone to sleep with it beside him, but he always seemed to wake up this way. His sleep had been getting deeper since he'd started sleeping with it too, part of the learning benefits he assumed. The door slowly opened and his mother peeked in. “Good morning sleepyhead” she smiled “I was starting to think you were going to sleep all day.” “Good morning mom” he responded “I guess I was just kind of tired.” She walked over to his bed and pulled back the covers “It's Saturday do you want to try getting out today?” She said as she casually pulled his pajama bottoms to his knees. “Sure” Tom answered “What is there to do?” “We'll talk about it about breakfast” She untaped his sodden diaper and dropped it in the pail. “You just keep on waking up wetter and wetter. I may need to get you some thicker diapers before you start leaking.” Tom didn't even have time to respond to that embarrassing suggestion before she pulled his top over his head. “Now do you want to take a shower yourself or do you want some help.” “Mom, I can do it myself.” She looked slightly disappointed “But you we're so nice and clean yesterday. You're sure you don't want a grown-up to do it.” “Believe me. I'm sure” “OK. But if I don't think you're doing a good job I might change my mind. I left some new soap in the shower I want you to use.” she stood up and tussled his hair as she left “Just hurry up. I'll have breakfast ready soon.” Tom sighed and shuffled to the bathroom. He turned the shower knob and began one of the few personal tasks still left to him. He let the water run over him for a few moments before noticing what his mother was talking about. He picked up the plastic bottle and turned it over a few times. Inside were three chambers filled with clear, amber, and blue liquids each with a small button. They fed into another chamber which seemed to rotate, maybe for mixing Tom guessed. He experimented with it for a few moments without a satisfactory result. When he could get something out of the bottle it was either a small glob or a jet of watery liquid. He put it back down in disgust wondering why everything had be so hard. He picked up the tiny sliver of bar soap that was left, it was small but it would have to do. Having heard him finish his shower his mother followed him to his room. “Just lie back and I'll get you ready for the day” she said as she pulled a diaper from the bag on his dresser. Tom did as he was told and watched as his mother collected his clothes. She got him into his diaper and playfully poked his chest “I can tell you didn't use the right soap” “I couldn't figure it out. Is the normal stuff good enough?” She held out his pants “You'll need to start using it to prevent diaper rash.” Tom compliantly stepped into them “But that's what the wipes and powder and stuff is for. Why do I need the soap too?” “Because that's just not enough” She pulled his shirt down over his head and took a moment to adjust it “I'll give you some time to figure it out on your own OK?” Tom sighed “Alright, I'll try” “Good boy. Now let's eat breakfast.” In the kitchen she sat a stack of pancakes on his plate and got a small sippy cup from the refrigerator. “Mom! I can drink from a normal cup.” “This is what you drink at school. You're teacher says you like it, it comes from the store like this.” Tom looked at the cup for a second and thought about the wonderful sweet tasting treat he enjoyed at preschool. But he shook his head. “No thanks, I'll just have some orange juice.” He watched as she set it back, halfway wishing he could just bring himself to ask for it. She gave him a glass of orange juice and sat down at her own plate. “Have you thought of anything you'd like to do today?” “Not really” “Well I have some shopping to do but I heard there's a really nice amusement park here. Would you like to go that?” Tom shrugged “Sure” After they were finished Karen quickly cleared the table. She took a cloth and ran it under the sink briefly. “So store first and then park?” she said as she wiped a bit of syrup from Tom's mouth. Tom tried to recoil from the sudden intrusion but it was over before he could react. “Yeah I guess” Tom answered while he watched her pick up a large blue bag and hoist it to her shoulder. “Mom, is that a...” He stammered. “It's just so I can carry some of the things I need. It's a big purse really.” Tom looked at the powder blue thing in horror “But it's got teddy bears and stuff on it. It's all... babyish.” “It looks just fine. The important thing is that I can change you while we're out. Would you rather have to rush home every time you wet or just never go out?” “No. But do you really need that?” She nodded “I just want to take care of you the best I can. Just trust me. Remember what I said about you being my little guy?” Tom looked down and blushed “Yeah I sort of remember that I guess.” “Well I meant it. And that means I'm going to do the best for you even if you think it's a little embarrassing at first.” She looked him in the eye “So are you going to trust me on this one or do you just want to stay home all day.” Tom looked up at her. Deep down he knew she had his best interests at heart “It's OK” he sighed “Let's go.” They climbed into the car and a short drive later they pulled into a supermarket parking lot. Tom was sure he knew what this was about. And sure enough he was led to the baby aisle and told to wait by the cart. His mother quickly found a fresh package of diapers, larger than the one he had already nearly depleted. Tom watched as she piled extra wipes and powder into the cart as well. Then she turned her attention back to the packages of diapers. She paused at a row of items that promised “Extra night-time protection.” She looked at her son “Stars and moons or animals again.” “Huh?” Tom replied, not fully understanding the question. “Nevermind honey, I think I'll get these” she said tossing a package into the cart. Now Tom could see that this brand seemed to be decorated with the same baby animal motif as his current diaper, but this time they were portrayed sleeping on little cartoon clouds. The clerk gave him a warm knowing smile as she rang up their purchase. “Somebody must be a heavy sleeper.” She said to his mother. “He's almost soaked through every night. I just hope these don't leak.” She replied. Tom looked at the ground. Even without his toddlerish school clothes she still immediately knew they were for him. “Mine was the same way, but these always held up well” The clerk said. “That's good the hear” Karen said as she collected her bagged groceries. “Have a nice weekend.” Back at the car Tom's mother took the diaper bag from her shoulder and took a moment to stock it with new supplies. She quickly checked Tom's diaper “You're OK for now. Ready for the amusement park?” Tom just nodded. He wasn't sure what to make of this public outing but at least it would be something different. They drove across town and walked up to the ticket booth. Karen paused to retrieve the stroller from the trunk. She turned to her son as she unfolded it “This is just in case you get tired or if we run into any crowds. I don't want you getting lost again.” Tom just sighed and followed her to the ticket booth. “One adult and one child” Karen informed the attendant. Two tickets were slid beneath the glass “We have special programs today for kids at the planetarium” the attendant said glancing between the diaper bag slung over Karen's shoulder, the stroller, and the child standing quietly near his mother's side. “I suppose you'll be interested in the Little Astronauts Club. They'll have a puppet show at noon. Just after the big kids have their lab.” “We just might look into that” Karen said as she ushered her son towards the gate. Once inside Tom's eyes followed the twists of the roller-coaster before him to its intimidating summit. The ride had been visible from some distance, but here in its shadow it all seemed like far too much. “I'm sorry Tommy. Looks like we'll have to find some other rides.” He looked over to his side, a large sign with a red line about two inches above his head announced “You must be at least this tall to rise our roller coasters.” “Oh, that's too bad” Tom said trying to sound disappointed as he looked back at the frightening mass of wood and steel before him. A group of elementary schoolers passed by on their way to the coaster, somehow taller and somehow unafraid. Not regretting the former for once he followed his mother as she pushed the stroller towards the other side of the park. They passed under a large archway bearing the words “Tyke's Land” and into a broad courtyard surrounded by festively colored rides. Tom surveyed them cautiously, he could guess which one his mother would suggest. “Would you like to go on Floppy Bunny's Forrest Romp” she offered, pointing towards tree decorated building into with various animal shaped cars disappeared at regular intervals. “Sure” Tom said. They checked the stroller at a small booth and climbed aboard a smiling frog. The ride's machanism clicked below them and they were pulled into a long corridor dressed up fairly convincingly like a forest. The voice of Floppy Bunny echoed from somewhere above inviting them to chase him to his den. “Want to try and steer?” His mother asked Tom took a non-committal hold of a steering wheel in front of him as the ride entered a much larger room. Before them stood an image of Floppy Bunny. Tom peered at it quizzically unable to figure out if it was a projection, a hologram, or some other strange technology. The room shuddered and began to spin as the rabbit began diving behind trees. Tom began to realize that the room was something like a bumper car ride. He found a pedal and begin to move the car forward. The rabbit leaped wildly about and Tom began steering more and more eagerly in its direction. He bounced off a tree and laughed never noticing his mother's bemused grin as she watched him play. Finally near the center of the room he caught up with his quarry. The mysterious animation disappeared and the lights came up. “Congratulations friends!” a voice echoed “You did a really good job catching me. Let's play again soon.” A mechanism caught the car and began moving it to another passage and up a ramp. Tom beamed proudly at his mother. “That was fun.” “I could see” she said mussing his hair “And you were pretty good at it too.” Tom was too lost in his victory to even bother dodging her hand. The ride came to a halt in the same place they started. As they exited the ride he scanned the other offerings. “Mom, can we go do the maze.” “Sure hon” she responded while the retrieved the stroller “Just wait up a bit.” Tom waited impatiently until she walked up beside him. “Can we go now?” “Not quite yet” his mother answered while casually gave his diaper a quick check “We'll go after I get you changed.” “Oh yeah” Tom said suddenly remembering his diaper. Without a word she took his hand and headed for a small nearby building marked with the blue and white figure of a diapered baby. Inside scenes of small children enjoying the park alongside cheerful cartoon characters adorned he walls. Several toddlers were already being attended to by their mothers. Tom was helped up onto a table where he laid back and joined them. She lowered his pants and reached into her well organized diaper bag. In just a few moments Tom was back in a dry diaper helped back down to his feet. As they stepped back out into the park Tom quickly forgot about that embarrassing interlude and focused again on the maze. He eagerly made his way to the entrance and waited impatiently for his mother to catch up. She arrived and he quickly decided to take the path in front of him. He hurried through a few turns before arriving at an intersection with a sign post indicating the four cardinal directions. A small sign attached was emblazoned with a cartoon penguin trudging merrily through the snow; “Follow Peter penguin to his snowy home” it suggested on bold blue lettering. Tom pondered for a moment. He recalled something from one of the videos at preschool about penguins only living in the South Pole. Excitedly he urged his mother down the southern route. As he continued along this path he encountered more progressively difficult riddles and it each he dashed enthusiastically ahead but took care stay within her sight. He reached the end of the maze and turned around to beam back at his mother as she pushed the up the last stretch. “Good job” she said as she approached. Tom looked down slightly once again realizing his childish enthusiasm. But he was genuinely proud of having figured out the last few bits without making any mistakes. “Thanks” he said with a hint of bashfulness “It kind of helped that we learned some of that in school.” She smiled and mussed his hair “I'm glad you're learning so much. She checked her watch “We should start getting home. Are you ready?” Tom nodded and began to follow her towards the exit. Karen paused for a moment and looked back at her son. With no fun left to have Tom was beginning to feel tired from all his running around. “Do you want to sit in your stroller honey?” she offered sweetly. Tom shook his head “No thank you.” “You mean I had to follow you around with this thing for nothing?” she teased. Tom looked at his mother and smiled. He could see she just wanted to let him rest, and he did feel tired. He sat down in the stroller and settled himself in. In a moment he was being pushed along the park's twisting walkways. Sometime before they reach the parking lot he dozed off. He came to as his mother was opening the passenger side door. She helped out of his stroller and fastened his seat belt for him as he watched her groggily. She paused for a moment examining his seat belt and seeming to contemplate something. “Just go ahead and sleep sleep sweety” she said kissing his forehead. “I guess I'm just getting used to naps” Tom responded settling deep his seat and closing his eyes. He heard his mother quickly putting his stroller and diaper bag into the trunk. With fresh memories of the day he'd spent with her drifting pleasantly through his head he drifted back to sleep. Chapter 15 It was late after-noon on Sunday. Tom sprawled out lazily on the floor with his coloring book in front of him and his teddy bear by his side. The ignored television had drifted from a cheerful cartoon that had held his attention to some baffling show about elementary school kids solving neighborhood mysteries with quantum physics. He wished he'd accepted his mother's offer of a visit to the toy store. There wasn't much for a preschooler to do. He looked up at her sitting on the couch engrossed in a magazine. “Mom, can I get something from the toy store?” he asked. She looked back at him sympathetically “Starting to get a little bored without any toys honey?” “Yeah, I guess we should have gone before. I was just sort of embarrassed.” “I understand” she said setting down her magazine and putting out her arms “You want to come over here and just talk?” Tom waked over to her and allowed himself to be taken up in her lap. “Can't we go now?” She shook her head “Sorry sweety, I don't think we have time. But if you're good for the sitter I'll let you pick out two things OK?” She said cheerfully. Tom groaned “Do I really need a babysitter?” “We already talked about why you need one” she said patting his bottom. “But she's a teenager. She's only like three grades higher than I'm supposed to be” Tom pleaded. “That doesn't matter” she said in a pleasant but firm tone “Besides everybody says the she's best in the neighborhood. And she always brings toys, so maybe you two will have something to do.” “But...” She grabbed him gently by the chin and looked him in the eye “Just promise me you'll be good so I don't have to worry.” Tom sighed “OK.” She smiled and gave him a big kiss on the cheek “That's my good boy.” “I guess it might not be too bad” Tom mused for a moment before being distracted by the opening notes of the Cartoonimals theme. He quickly turned his attention to the television. “Is this the show Mrs. Hansley says you like so much?” Tom nodded excitedly “Yeah, it's really good.” Karen put her arms around her son and let him settle further into her lap. “Would you like to watch it with me?” Tom couldn't help the smile creeping across his face. “Sure.” He settled his head on her shoulder. “That's Gavin Giraffe” he said pointing out the character “He's my favorite.” “I thought he might be” She said smiling. The doorbell rang. “That must be Kirsten.” She sat Tom down on his feet and went to the door. Tom hesitated for a moment. How could he possibly greet this girl who should at least be something close to a peer. He stepped cautiously into the entryway and peered around his mother to girl with energetic eyes who stood in their doorway. “Thank you for coming on such short notice. You're a real life saver” His mother said. “No problem Mrs. Welton” Kirsten said with buoyant confidence. She caught sight of the boy peeking warily from around his mother “And this must be Tommy.” Karen stepped aside and urged Tom over “Tommy this is Kirsten your new babysitter.” “Hi” Tom offered tentatively. Kirsten knelt far enough to be face to face “Hi Tommy. I'm sure we're going to get along great.” “He's already promised to be a good boy” Karen said getting her purse “Didn't you?” Tom nodded slowly “Yeah.” Karen turned to Kirsten “Diapers and things are in the basket next to the couch” she said pointing in the direction of the living room “And there's some more in his room. And don't forget to get him in his nighttime diapers when you put him to bed, he tends to get really wet at night. And my phone number...” Kirsten whipped her phone out of her purse “Already got it. Along with your work, and the neighbors across the street.” Karen smiled and shook her head “It's good to have someone so responsible to rely on. Dinner is in the fridge, I guess I won't need to tell you how to get it ready.” “I have it all taken care of Mrs. Welton. No need to worry about a thing.” “Thank you Kirsten” She gave Tom a hug and a kiss on his forehead “Bye-bye sweety. I'll get home after your bedtime so I'll see you in the morning.” “Bye mom” Tom said politely still blushing from her instructions. He watched her as she waved and stepped out the door, closing it behind her. Kirsten clapped her hands together “So should we get started playing a game or getting out some toys. I have some right here” She said indicating the colorful canvass bag slung over her shoulder” “I think I just want to watch TV right now” Tom said turning toward the living room. “Alright” she said following him “But you can't be shy all night.” She sat herself on the couch as her new charge stretched out in front of the TV “Oh, Cartoonimals! Cool!” She enthused. “Go ahead and watch your show, I'm just going to call a friend. Maybe you'll want to play when it's over?” “Sure” Tom said flatly. “Hey Amanda this is Kirsten” She said to the person at other end of the line “Yeah, I'm just babysitting tonight.” Tom tried to ignore the intrusion. “No” Kirsten said correcting her friend on something “New client tonight,. A little boy so I'm on diaper duty tonight.” Tom tried harder to shut the the conversation out. “I finished all my homework last night, so no problem there.” She continued “There's supposed a test in Mr. Peterson's class tomorrow but it's just on Calabi-Yau manifolds so I'm not too worried.” The conversation drifted into gossip about people and events that may as well have taken place on the dark side of a distant planet as far as Tom was concerned. His world was one of cartoons and storytimes and all these things that he'd once expected to be part of now seemed distant and remote. Soon after Tom's show came to an end Kirsten hung up the call slapped her hand to her knees “Are you ready to play something yet?” “Sure” Tom relented. He could see this was going to be a boring evening otherwise. Kirsten smiled “Good, I could see you were really interested in your show. You must really like the Cartoonimals.” “Yeah I guess” Tom said “Sometimes I think...” He paused wondering if the thought he'd been turning over in his mind was too crazy to say aloud. “Think what?” Kirsten asked. “Sometimes I think it might be hypnotizing me or something.” Tom said in hopes of some outside confirmation “Like maybe that's why I need diapers and stuff.” Kirsten tried to stifle a laugh as she sat down on the floor next to him “You're just a little boy Tommy. I watch the Cartoonimals all the time when I'm babysitting and I'm not hypnotized.” Tom looked at the teenager sitting beside him so poised, collected, and mature. He could only conclude that she was right. Maybe there really was a difference between them. She reached over and gave his hair a playful tussle “Don't worry kiddo, I'm sure your mommy will get you all nice and potty trained once you're ready.” With that Tom became aware of a cold dampness between his legs. He looked down to avoid her eyes. But she tell something was wrong. “Do you need a change now?” she asked. “Maybe” Tom reluctantly admitted. Without another word she pulled back the waistband of his pants and quickly checked his diaper. “Yep, you're soaked.” She quickly found the basket of diapering supplies and began laying out the changing mat. She patted the mat with one hand looking directly at him “Just lie down and I'll get you all ready, then you can pick out what game you want to play.” Tom balked. Being changed by his mother was one thing, his teachers were something else. But being so dependent on this high school student made a certain point. Kirsten put her hands to her hips “Remember how you promised your mommy you'd be good tonight?” But it was a point that couldn't be denied. He looked at her eyes filled with patient authority and laid down in front of her. “That's better” she cooed as she took a fresh diaper from the basket. Effortlessly she undid his button and slid his pants to his knees. She was a bit more generous with the baby powder than his other caretakers and the smell lingered strongly even as she taped his new diaper into place. “There we go” she said fastening his pants “That wasn't so bad was it?” Tom just shook his head. It was always a relief to be out of a cold sodden diaper. It was a comfort he had to rely on others for. And he knew this was someone he could trust as much as any young child would. “I thought so” she said while she reached for a large bag “Now do you want to pick out a game or do you want to play my favorite?” “You can choose I guess” Tom shrugged. She began setting out a board with a path running through a cartoonish forest. Along the way where various sites like a blue trimmed house labeled “Grandma's Cottage” with smoke curling from a chimney or a beaver's dam bearing the name “Bucky's Den.” “First you spin the spinner” she explained “Then you roll the dice and take a card. Each card has an equation written on it and you try to plug the numbers you got from the spinner and the dice into it so you can move the greatest number of spaces.” Tom scratched his head as he turned over one of the cards and looked over it's elaborate series of numbers, letters, and parentheses. “This looks kind of hard.” Kirsten looked in her bag “The other preschool games I have are Calliope's Chemistry Lab and Geometry Land.” “This will be OK I guess” Tom said casting the card back into the pile. Kirsten handed him a teddy bear shaped calculator with big bright buttons. “You can use this and I might you give you some hints if you really get stuck.” Tom took the first turn and furrowed his brow as he looked between the numbers he'd gotten and the strange equation written on the card. He'd knew he'd seen this stuff, but he'd not yet mastered it. He pecked at the calculator for a while and moved his piece a few spaces before turning the dice over to Kirsten. She breezily worked out the problem and moved well ahead of Tom's piece, giving him a quick explanation of how she'd figured out the best way to solve the problem. The rest of the game continued a similar fashion. Tom made a few mistakes which she quickly corrected and gave him some advice. Soon he was winning and while he suspected she was letting him win he found himself enjoying the special attention that was being paid to him. As he landed in the final square she gave him an enthusiastic round of applause. “Good job” She said as she began to gather up the game. “Thanks for helping me with some of the hard stuff. I think I kind of learned some stuff too” Tom said. Kirsten smiled with a bit of pride “Well I do want to go into early childhood education” to she she quickly amended “That means teaching little kids like you stuff like basic algebra.” She glanced at her watch “Are you ready for dinner?” “Sure” “Alright, I'll go get it ready. You can look in my bag and see if there's any toys you want to play with.” Tom reached into the bag as she walked off into the kitchen and pulled out a toy robot. He turned it over a few times and examined the panel of buttons across its chest. He pressed one and the robot sprang to life its mechanical arms and legs swinging through the air. He sat it down and watched as it walked a short distance before coming to a halt. He tried some more buttons and discovered that he could make it turn, walk backwards, or even reach for things. Finally he found a switch that allowed multiple buttons to be pushed before letting the robot go to perform them in sequence. He watched in wide eyed delight as it ran a simple rectangle he'd planned out. He began trying to work out how to get to pick up one of his crayons when Kirsten called from the kitchen. “Tommy! Dinner's ready.” she called. Tom reluctantly left his robot and walked into the kitchen. He found his place set with one of the sippy cups his mother had offered him the day before. He may have protested but he knew there was no chance of convincing her he was too big for such a thing, and in truth he'd come to crave the beverage inside. They both sat down and started their meal. “Is Mrs. Peterson one of your teachers?” She asked between bites. “Yeah, she's nice. I like the way she reads stories.” Kirsten nodded “She was a teacher there when I was in preschool. She's been teaching there forever so she's really really good at it. Mrs. Hansley must still be there too right?” “Yeah. And Ms. Kelly too. She's really nice and she helped me learn how to use an art pen.” Kirsten looked over the the refrigerator “I saw that drawing of you and your mommy over there, that's very sweet and you did a good job.” Tom blushed a bit at the attention but he was genuinely proud of what he'd managed to do “Thanks” After dinner Tom spent the rest of the evening happily engrossed with the toy robot while Kirsten sat and read one of her text books on the couch. Through trial and error he was able to create more and more complex routines. He'd just managed to run it in a circuit around the coffee table and behind the couch to pick up a crayon when Kirsten checked her watch. “Five more minutes till bedtime big guy.” She said. Tom groaned in disappointment. “Don't be like that. You have bedtime story to look forward to, I always read to kids who've been good.” Tom perked up slightly “You're going to say I was good?” “As long as you don't give me any trouble about putting you to bed, sure.” She said before going back to her book. Tom returned to the robot and began dreaming of his upcoming visit to the toy store. A few minutes later Kirsten stood up from the couch. “OK sweety, it's time for bed.” she extended her hand and Tom took it without a second thought. She led him to his room and instructed him to lie down on his bed. She quickly found a neatly folded set of PJs topped with thick diaper and handwritten note reading “Tommy's nighttime things” on his dresser. She quickly removed his shirt and pants before untaping his diaper and disposing of it in the pail. She added a fresh layer of baby powder and slid the extra thick nighttime diaper beneath him “These have the cutest designs” she cooed as she taped it in place. Her voice had become soft and soothing like she was trying to coax him to sleep. After he'd stepped into his PJ bottoms she pulled back the covers and tucked him in. She sat down at the side of the bed with a book. “Now this one of my favorites” she said “It's called Danny's Adventure's in Dreamland.” As she began to read Tom realized that for once this had nothing to do with algebra or physics. It was just a kid's book, but he was transfixed. Fanciful illustrations spilled across every page as he heard the story of boy named Danny and his amazing adventures. As Kirsten closed the book and stood up he felt relaxed and cozy and ready for sleep. “Now don't worry about anything, your mommy will be home soon. Good night.” “Good night” Tom responded drowsily as she turned off the light and closed the door behind her. Sometime during the night he came half awake. He smelled his mother's perfume and felt a kiss on his forehead. He drifted happily back to sleep. Chapter 16 “Good morning honey.” Tom looked up at his mother smiling at him “Good morning mom.” He yawned and without even thinking rolled over on his back while she lifted his covers and began pulling down his PJ bottoms. “Kirsten said you were a pleasure to babysit” she said while she undid his sodden nighttime diaper “So we can go the toy store on our way from from school if you want.” Tom smiled and rubbed his eyes. His teddy bear was still nestled under one arm even as he was changed “I guess I thought she was a pretty good babysitter too.” He said. She lifted his PJ top over his head “That's good to hear. Now go get in the shower and don't forget to try that soap.” In the shower he looked over the strange bottle once more. He'd been shown more than once how it was meant to be operated but he just couldn't get it right. His morning shower was his last true refuge of maturity and afterward he'd walk right back into his mother's arms to be diapered and dressed for the day. He sighed and sat the bottle back down, he did the best he could with the bar of soap and finished up. As he lied down on his bed his mother took a diaper from the bag and looked him over. “Still having a little trouble with that soap huh?” “Do I really have to use it? I just can't figure it out.” She slid the diaper underneath him and reached for the powder “Don't worry about it I'll just give you a little help tonight before bedtime” she said as she shook out some powder and taped his diaper in place. “Can't I just take an extra shower or something?” “It's just a little bath, it's no big deal” she paused and poked a finger to his chest taking a slightly sterner tone “Now don't give me any trouble or might have to rethink the toy store.” Tom quieted himself and stood up to be helped into his clothes. “That's better” she said adjusting the straps of his shortalls “I bet going to bed feeling all nice and clean will make you forget all about it. Now let's go get some breakfast and get you to school.” At preschool the sun shone brightly through the large windows, brightening the room's already cheerful hues. It was the first bit of sun in days and as Tom sat with his morning snack and watched cartoons his teachers were busy preparing the class for a trip to the playground. Ms. Kelly came by to give his diaper a quick check before declaring him ready to go out and moving on to the next student. Once all the students in need of a change had been tended to everybody was ushered outside to a playground sat in the corner of the yard surrounding the entire daycare complex. Tom hung back for a moment while his classmates mobbed the swings and slides. Tom found an empty swing and sat down. He let himself dangle while he watched the others, unable to bring himself to participate. Soon he felt a pair of hands at his back. He turned around to see a red headed boy smiling back at him. “I'll give you push” he said excitedly. Tom nearly laughed. He wasn't quite a giant here, but he was certain that such a small child wouldn't be able to budge him at all. A moment later he was arcing through the air. Another sturdy shove as he neared the ground sent him to even higher. His shock at the strength of his classmate soon gave way to the simple joy of being on a swing. He'd forgotten what it was like to feel the wind in his hair and the the short weightless drift as he hit the top of his swing. Finally he noticed something off on the other end of the playground and skidded to a stop. In his excitement he took off running. The merry-go-round had been a favorite of his and he wanted a chance to try this one out. He leaped onto it as slowed. He expected that one of the teachers might give it another shove but instead another boy hopped off and gave it a heave. Tom held tight as the merry-go-round lurched suddenly. One by one boys and girls hopped off to give the ride a forceful spin. Tom wondered if this was something else where he was barely keeping up with his new peers. With a ring of a bell Mrs. Peterson called the class into a disorderly line in front of the door to the classroom. As they marched inside a quick diaper check sent each child either to the changing tables or directly to the nap room. Mrs. Hansley pulled Tom over to tables. “Did you have fun outside” she asked as she sat him down. “Yeah” Tom admitted as he lay back“The swings were pretty fun.” “Looks like you got a little boo-boo” she said. Tom looked the small scrape on his elbow “I guess I got that on the merry-go-round. I didn't even notice.” “Don't worry” she said untaping his heavy diaper “the LumiGro will help that while you're taking your nap.” “LumiGro?” Tom said in bafflement. She fasten a fresh diaper to his hips “It doesn't just help you get big and strong, it helps your boo-boos too.” She smiled and handed him over to Ms. Kelly who led him to the nap room and helped him into his crib. Tom gazed at the soft blue light emanating from the corners of his crib. Now he knew what it was. Now he knew why he'd been the runt of his elementary school classes and why even his classmates here were so surprisingly strong. It dawned on him that he might belong here more than he'd realized. The lights went down as the teachers left the room and the familiar lullaby began to play. He snuggled the stuffed bunny that had taken up home in his crib and fell softly asleep. He awoke to the sound of his crib being unlatched and lowered. Mrs. Peterson hooked a finger into his diaper. “Wet again? We might have to start charging your mommy for extra diapers” she teased. He was ushered back to the changing table and sent to play with the other children. He sat and contented himself with some toys while he eagerly awaited going with his mother to get his own. When he saw her come through the door he could barely contain himself from bounding over to greet her. “Hi mom” he said cheerfully “Hey baby” she chuckled “Looks like somebody's excited about going to the toy store.” “Can go right away?” he asked “I don't know” she teased “were you a good boy today?” Mrs. Hansley laughed as she handed Karen the sign-out sheet “Tommy is a joy to have around. You should have seen him today in his crib with his stuffed bunny. Just adorable.” Tom blushed bright red “It's just really comfortable in there” His mother finished with the sign-out sheet and gave his hair a ruffle “Come on cuddle-bun, let's go get you some toys.” “Moooom” Tom groaned “Cuddle-bun?” “I'm sorry there tough guy” she said lightly tapping his chin with a playful fist “You still want to come with me for some toys?” He nodded excitedly and without waiting for it to be offered or even giving it a thought reached for her hand and walked with her to the car. As they walked into the toy store a bell attached to the door merrily announced their arrival. A kindly faced older man with a pair of bifocals perched on his nose looked up from the counter and smiled warmly at them. “Welcome to Children's Kingdom. Can you help you find something?” “My son is here to pick out some toys” Tom looked around him there was more to this place than toys. A large section to his left trailed off into a selection of more practical needs; furniture, clothes, and other sundry items. “Preschool toys are right over here” the man said motioning towards a circle of colorful shelves. Tom walked over and found himself surrounded by a colorful array of boxes and displays. Some toys he recognized from school, some were new. He looked over a few that had been taken out of their boxes and put on display while the adults talked behind him. He picked out the same robot he'd played with the night before and a toy race car kit like the one a school. On his way back to his mother he passed a crib just like the one he took his naps in at school. He paused stared at it. For a moment he considered asking for it. It was always so comfy and he wanted to be able to keep up with the other kids. He felt his mother's hand on his shoulder. “Find something else you want?” She asked. “No, just looking” Tom said pausing just a little too long to be believable. “It's OK if you'd rather sleep in a crib. I was thinking of getting you one but I wasn't sure you'd like it.” “Don't they have any regular beds with those light things” Tom asked the shopkeeper. He shook his head “Sorry son. The effect stops working after a while, so none of the big kid beds have them.” Tom looked back at is mother “OK, I like the one at school I guess.” She smiled “I think that's a good idea honey.” She turned to the shopkeeper “When can you have one delivered?” He quickly looked over a sheet of paper “Looks like we can fit you in tomorrow.” “Great. Sign us up, and he'll take these two toys too.” As they climbed back in the car Tom sat his new toys in his lap “Thanks mom.” “You're welcome honey. We can make this a weekly treat for being a good boy if you want.” Tom nodded excitedly “I'd like that. There's some other stuff I wanted too.” “Good, I'd like to get some extra sheets for your crib, just in case your night diaper doesn't hold out.” Tom blushed slightly “ Do you really think the crib is a good idea?” Karen nodded emphatically “Yes I do. You're going to have to sleep in one for a while if you want to be a big kid.” “I guess it will be alright for a while” Tom mused. As his mother pulled the car into traffic he wondered how long a while would be. At home he waited patiently through a diaper change before finally getting to open his new toys. He pulled a bag of robot parts from one box and unfolded a large sheet of directions. After a few attempts he managed to get the most basic first stages done on his own but he found the rest of the instructions trailed off into far more difficult territory. “Ask a grown-up or other big person for help” the instructions cheerfully suggested. “Mom?” Tom called hesitantly from his spot on the floor “Can you help me with this? Please.” She looked up from some papers she was working on and smiled “I guess I can take a break.” She sat down beside him and put an arm around his shoulder while she studied the directions. “This part goes with that part” she said pointing to some pieces laying on the carpet. She guided him through the rest of the process pausing several times to handle more complicated steps. Finally he snapped the final piece in place. “Alright, good job” his mother said giving him a gentle pat on the back. Tom happily turned his new robot over in his hands “You helped with most of the hard stuff” he thought for a moment and gave her a hug and a little kiss on the cheek “Thanks mom.” “Awwww” she cooed as she hugged him tightly and returned his kiss “You're welcome sweet boy.” She embraced him for a moment longer before giving him a pat on the bottom “I need to make dinner. Why don't you play with your new toys?” Tom picked his robot back up and spent the rest of his evening keenly absorbed in is new toys. He paused for dinner chatting happily with his mother about his day before breezing out again to living room for more playtime. After a while his mother tapped her watch. “It's getting close to your bedtime” she said with calm authority “Let's get you into the tub.” Tom looked up at her with pleading eyes “Can't I just keep doing that myself. Please.” “Once you learn to do it yourself you can, but I'm going to help you until then.” “But...” Tom started. “Don't you want to be a good boy like we talked about before?” Tom quietly took her hand and she led him upstairs to the bathroom. She started the tap before turning to get him undressed. “There we go” she said as she unfastened his diaper “just sit down in the tub and I'll get you all nice clean. You'll feel a lot better, you'll see.” Tom stepped into the tub and sat down. He watched as his mother took the bottle of soap that had given him so much trouble and deftly worked its mechanism to soap up the water. She squirted out some more on a washcloth and began washing him head to toe. Tom wasn't sure if it was the nice warm water, the pleasant calming smell of the soap, or just his mother's loving care but he was slowly able to just relax. She gave him a little tickle under his arm “I told you” she said and began to lather up his hair. Tom just closed his eyes and felt the soap and water wash over him. “There we go all nice and clean. Now just step out and I'll get you ready for bed” As Tom got out of the tub she wrapped him in a big fluffy towel. He peeked out at his mother from it's generous folds as she dried him thoroughly “Thanks mom. That feels a lot better. Sorry I tried to argue with you.” “You're welcome honey” she said as she finished up “And I know you're just trying to be big. You're still a very good boy. Now how about some PJs and a nice bedtime story?” “Bedtime story?” Tom asked. “Sure” his mother responded while she hung up his towel “Kirsten said you seemed to enjoy it. So unless you're just in a hurry to get to sleep...” “OK” Tom said with a amused smile “I guess it was pretty nice.” In his room Tom lay back on his bed while his mother gathered a fresh nighttime diaper and baby powder. As she began applying the powder he asked “What story are you going to read.” She smiled “Something special I think your going to like.” She slid the extra thick diaper beneath him and taped it snugly in place before helping him into his PJs. She tucked him in as he settled down in his bed with his teddy bear in his arms. “I just saw something today while I was getting lunch and it made me think of you” she said taking a large thin book wit h sturdy pages titled The Story of Gavin Giraffe. Tom blushed slightly “That book made you think of me?” She sat on the side of his bed “You said he was your favorite and I thought we might give it a try.” She open the book and began reading the story of how Gavin came to join the other characters and how, at first, he thought he was bigger than everybody else. Tom held his bear closer and found himself laughing at the voices his mother had chosen for the characters. In the end Gavin understood that he had a lot to learn from the others and they all became friends. She closed the book and stood up giving her son a kiss on the forehead “Good night sweety” she said softly. Tom sat up enough to give her a kiss on the cheek “Good night mom.” She turned off the light on the way out and closed the door quietly behind her. Tom closed his eyes and thought about his mother finding that book and thinking about him. He knew he had play his part to make this strange situation work out as well as possible for both of them. And it seemed more and more every day that it might be an easy part to fit into. He hugged his teddy bear to his chest and drifted off to sleep. Chapter 17 Tom fished out his last spoonful of cereal while his mother talked on the phone. “Thank you” she said “If I'd known this was a school holiday I'd have planned ahead.” She listened for a moment and laughed “I hope he's not much of a problem, he's usually very well behaved. I'll just need to get his diaper bag all packed and I'll drop him off.” Tom tried to look interested in the remains of his orange juice while these arrangements were made. Karen ended the call and sat at the table smiling. “That was Mrs. Burke, I think you know her son Johnny from when you were in Mrs. Taylor's class. She says she'll be able to watch you today.” Tom looked back at her. “Yeah I remember him.” He recalled a time, not long ago, that he would have protested such an arrangement. Now it would seem ridiculous. He obviously needed some kind of supervision. “I think that will be alright.” She smiled a smoothed his bangs “I think so too.” They arrived at the Burke's doorstep, Tom's freshly packed diaper back slung over his mother's shoulder. Tom let his arm hang loosely from her grip on his hand and looked at the large welcome mat while she rang the doorbell. Johnny's mother answered the door with an enthusiastic “Hey guys!” “Hi Marie, nice to meet you” Karen said as she shifted the diaper bag to her hand “This is Tommy.” “Hi Tommy” she said bending down to meet his face “Johnny is so excited to have you over today.” “Hi” Tom replied sheepishly as his mother handed his diaper bag over to Mrs. Burke. “This should be everything he needs, he only goes through a few diapers a day” She said “Thank you so much for taking him on such short notice.” “It's no trouble at all” She said offering a hand to to Tommy “It'll be fun to have a little guy around the house again.” At that Karen looked at Tom dressed in his preschool shortalls and smiled. She knelt down and gave him a hug “Be good for Mrs. Burke.” Tom hugged back “I will.” She let him go with a kiss on his forehead “Good bye sweety. I'll be back as soon as I can.” “Bye mom” Tom said as he took Mrs Burke's hand. Karen stepped towards the car as Mrs. Burke led him inside and closed the door “Wanna go see what Johnny's doing?” She led him to Johnny's room and rapped lightly on the already open door. “Johnny I have a little visitor for you.” Johnny looked up from a set of models he was working on “Hi Tommy!” He said enthusiastically “We're gonna have a lot of fun today I just know it.” Tom smiled warily. It was good see his friend again, but the circumstances were so different now. “You two have fun” She said cheerily “And let me know if you think you need anything” Tom noticed her nod in his direction and pointed look at Johnny. “I will Mom” Johnny said she walked away. Tom walked across the room to Johnny's desk. He glanced around at the various intricate looking models and shelves of inscrutable toys. “What are you doing?” he said in the most casual manner he could manage. “I'm just making a model of the Battle of Hastings” Johnny said with a small measure of pride “Of course no one really knows how the English side was set up but I put the front line all the way to the river just 'cause it looks cooler.” He looked at Tom who only nodded slowly but eyed the soldiers with excitement. “This guy over here is William II of Normandy” Johnny said gearing down his explanation “And this is Harold II.” “That looks really cool. But I don't know who those guys are.” Tom admitted. “That's OK” Johnny said setting down one of the models “Let's find something we can both do.” Johnny opened up his closet and began reaching into the back. “I haven't played with this for a while but it's lots of fun' He said as he as retrieved a box depicting several Kindergarten-aged kids playing with some sort of large crane. He sat the box down in the middle of the floor and opened it revealing a well-organized set of metal pieces and engine parts. “What do you want to make?” Tom looked everything over “I don't know. It looks kind of complicated.” Johnny smiled “It's OK I know what to do with the hard parts. How about a crane like the one on the box?” “Sure” Tom shrugged as he sat down beside his friend. Tom worked on the base while Johnny put together several motors as he tried to explain a few things about torque and armature. Tom just nodded and focused on linking his pieces together. Before long they came to the point where one of the motors was to be attached. Johnny handed him an unfinished motor and stepped him through adding some of the basic components. As his sketchy understanding grew he watched their creation become a working crane. He took the controls and, with a sense of accomplishment, began picking up and moving some toy cars Johnny had spread out. “Neat huh?” Johnny said “Yeah, this is cool” Tom replied. “Hey guys, I've got some snacks for you!” Mrs. Burke shouted from downstairs. Tom rushed down with Johnny and found two places set up in front of the TV. “I'm sorry Tommy” Mrs. Burke explained “I couldn't find any sippy cups but I found and old bottle. I know you're a little big for that but I hope it's OK.” Tom looked for a moment at the small plate of fresh cookies and the pale blue baby bottle beside it. “Oh” Tom said trying to register as little embarrassment with her well intentioned hospitality as possible “That's OK.” He sat cross legged on the floor while she turned the TV to some cartoon he hadn't seen before. Tentatively he tilted the bottle back and brought it to his lips. The liquid inside was delicious, like what he drank from his sippy cup at preschool but better. He began drinking in earnest until he felt his diaper being checked. “You're good for now” Mrs. Burke said patting his head “But not for long if you keep drinking like that.” Johnny came back from a quick trip to the bathroom and settled in beside Tom. “Oh I used to watch this show all the time” He said.. “What is it?” “The Triangle Trio” Johnny said taking his glass of milk “its about basic trigonometry.” Tom as cross legged and drank slowly from his bottle as he watched with growing interest. When he found himself laughing alone he looked over and saw Johnny wasn't paying attention. “We could try watching something you like” Tom offered to his friend. “This is OK” Johnny said batting away the suggestion “There's really just preschool stuff on right now anyway.” The closing theme of the show prompted Mrs. Burke's return to the room. She placed her hand on her knees and looked down happily at Tom “Now that we've had a snack I think it might be time for a nap” she knelt down next to him and checked his diaper “And some new pants too. Come on, we'll just let Johnny have some big kid time.” She took him by the hand and led him upstairs to a small guest room where a large comfy looking bed had been outfitted with a fold-out railing and a collection of stuffed animals. Tom's diaper bag had been been set on the dresser and she quickly retrieved his changing mat and fresh diaper from it. She laid the changing mat across the foot of the bed and turned to get more supplies. Tom knew exactly what was expected of him and he laid back on the mat without protest or complaint. “OK sweetheart just lie down and..” she said before she turned around and saw him lying there. “Such a good boy” she smiled. She quickly undid his shortalls and began removing his sodden diaper “Getting all this stuff out of storage made me think about how much I miss having a little guy to take care of around here” she said wistfully “Johnny's gotten so big he hardly needs me any more.” She got him cleaned, powder and into a dry diaper before pulling back the covers and allowing him to climb in. “Now just try to take a little nap” she said tucking him in “and we can go to the park after you get up.” She left him with another bottle, pressed a button on a small blue cube on the night stand, and quietly closed the door behind her. Tom held his bottle and looked curiously at the cube as a soft lullabye began to drift faintly from somewhere inside. He could still hear the sounds of Johnny downstairs watching some program for big kids and as the gentle music filled the room and sleep overcame him he wondered when he'd be big again. Mrs. Burke roused him by shaking his shoulder and he found his bottle pressed to his lips and half empty. In his other hand a plain brown stuffed bear was clutched loosely to his chest. “Looks like you made yourself nice and comfy” his babysitter observed. With scarcely another word he was changed out of his nap time diaper and brought down stairs where Johnny was already ready for a trip to the neighborhood park. Mrs. Burke, diaper bag slung over one shoulder, held Tom's hand all through the several blocks to the park while Johnny walked briskly ahead excitedly detailing all the things they could do at there. When they arrived she knelt down and place a hand on Tom's shoulder. “Just let me know if any of these big kid rides get too scary” she said indicating another smaller play ground at the bottom of the hill “There's another playground for preschool kids over there if you'd like.” Tom looked up at the odd playground equipment towering over his head. A set of swings seemed to have some sort of elaborate mechanical contraption at it's top. While down at the bottom of the hill was small arrangement of cheery looking plastic rides much like the ones he'd seen anywhere else. He watched as Johnny dashed off for the big kid equipment and considered his options. “I think this will be fine” he said. “OK hon, I”ll just be right over there on the bench.” She gave him a pat on the bottom. He joined Johnny at the swing set. “Sit down Tommy” Johnny said “This is one of my favorites.” Tom sat himself in one of the swings and watched as Johnny flipped two switches and rushed over to the neighboring swing. “Don't forget to hold on” Johnny cautioned as he sat down. From above Tom heard whirring sound and his swing began to sway back and forth. “Oh neat” Tom said “It's all automatic” a hard metal clink sounded and the swing thrust them both higher. Tom tightened his grip but smiled “I like this one” he said happily. “It gets a lot better than this” Johnny replied with a grin. Another clank and the swings flew still higher. Now Tom was being lifted out of of seat. He held tighter and watched the ground fly away from beneath him. He took a breath and told himself to hold it together. A whirring sound came from above and Tom wrapped his hands desperately around the chain as the swing began to spin. It spun faster and faster as he heard Johnny laughing with delight beside him. Finally he let out a small yelp. Somewhere in the whirl spinning around him he saw Mrs. Burke reach out for the switch. Slowly everything wound down until he could take a dizzy step off the swing. Mrs. Burke knelt down and placed steadying hands gently on his shoulders “Are you OK sweety?” “Yeah I'm fine” Tom said with evident embarrassment as he leaned against his caretaker for support. “Sorry Tommy” Johnny said “I thought you'd have fun.” “That's OK” Tom replied. As the world started to settle around him he became aware his diaper being checked. “Oh dear, you are absolutely soaked” Mrs. Burke rose to her feet and took his hand “Let's go get you changed and then maybe we can try out the other playground. Johnny might want some more big kid time.” As Tom was led down toward the diaper changing room he looked back at Johnny happily jumping back on the swing. Once inside he was hoisted onto the the nearest changing table. “I'm sorry about all that” she said as she retrieved supplies from the diaper bag and began undoing Tom's shortalls “The other playground looks like a lot more fun don't you think?” Tom nodded “It looks more like the one at my school. That one doesn't have spinning swings or anything like that.” Mrs. Burke slid a fresh diaper under his bottom and taped it into place “I think so too. Let's go give it a try.” She set him on his feet, took his hand, and led him out to the playground. She paused for a moment to assess its offerings. “Would you like to start with the sandbox?” “Sure” Tom said unenthusiastically, disinterested in the sandbox itself but eager to avoid being hurtled around by another automatic swing set. He sat at the edge of the sandbox and absentmindedly ran the sand through his fingers. He paused and looked at the sand curiously, something about it felt different. He took a small handful and squeezed it his hand. Surprised to find that it held its shape he knelt down in the sand to see what else it could do. He quickly learned that could easily mold it into almost any shape he wanted or break it apart again by rubbing it between his fingers. Without any thought to appearances he lost himself in constructing a grand sand castle with grand archways and towering parapets. His inexperience showed in the rough uneven walls and sometimes his structures collapsed but he carried on playing taking earnest pride in his childish looking structure. He was putting on some finishing touches when he heard footsteps behind him. He looked up to see his mother smiling at him. “Hey sweety, that's a great castle.” Tom stood up as she knelt down to hug him “Thanks” he said returning the hug “The sandboxes here are really fun.” “I can see you were enjoying yourself” she teased as she brushed sand from the seat of his shortalls. “You're covered in it. You'll definitely need a bath tonight.” She looked over to Mrs. Burke “Hi Marie, I hope he wasn't to much trouble.” Mrs. Burke gave Tom's cheek a pinch “He was a joy to watch.” she handed over his diaper bag “I'd be happy to look after him again if you need it.” Johnny bounded down the hill “Bye Tommy. I hope your mom let's you come over to play again soon. Maybe you'll even be ready for the big kid swings.” Tom glanced at the menacing swings at the top of the hill “Yeah maybe” “I think Tommy might prefer the sandbox for a little while” Mrs. Burke said. “Well thanks again.” Tom's mother said as she took his hand “Hope we'll see each other again soon. Bye guys” Tom looked contemplatively at the sandbox wondering how much longer he'd be playing in playgrounds like this one. He felt his mother give his hand a squeeze and looked to see her nod in the direction of Mrs. Burke and Johnny. “Oh yeah.” he quickly remembered himself “Bye Mrs. Burke. Bye Tommy.” Karen turned and began walking her son back home. “Just so you know, I stopped by the house earlier so they could deliver your new crib.” “Can't I sleep in my bed one more night?” Tom asked fearing he already knew the answer. His mother shook her head “Sorry sweety, they took it down to make room. You'll like it once you get used to it.” “I guess I can try.” Tom said sounding somewhat deflated. “That's my good boy” she replied mussing his hair slightly “Now let's go home and get some dinner.” Chapter 18 Tom stood in the his room looking over his new furniture. In the middle of the room was a large cherry-wood sleigh style crib neatly fitted with baby blue sheets patterned with nursery rhyme characters. His teddy bear was dutifully stationed in one corner. Beside the crib was a large rocking chair. To replace the convenient changing area his bed had offered, a changing table now stood against the far wall. “What do think?” his mother asked as she stocked it with diapers. “Do I really need to sleep in it with the rails up and everything?” “You do at school don't you?” “Yeah. But that's just for a little while. I mean those light things still work even when the rail is down right?” Tom pointed out hopefully. “Yes they do.” She replied as she stood up and approached her son “But your much safer with them up. It's a really big drop if you fall out.” “But I won't” he looked pleadingly into his mother's skeptical eyes. She began to shake her head and he took a new tact “What if I need you for something?” She knelt down and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder “Aww sweety, would you like it if I checked on you during the night.” He looked down. As much as he wanted to tell himself this was all just a gambit it was just as much of an admission. “I just what to be able to go to your room if something bad happens.” She lifted his chin and looked him in the eye. “You really are worried aren't you?” She relented “Well I suppose it's better than having you try to climb out.” She smiled “But I'm still going to start checking on you.” She pressed a finger playfully to his nose “And if I find you've rolled out you're getting locked up nice and tight.” She punctuated her teasing with a quick hug and light swat on his bottom. “Now how about some play time before dinner?” That night Tom sat in a tub filled with warm soapy water while his mother gave him his bedtime bath. She hummed softly as she scrubbed him. “Close your eyes so you don't get any soap in them honey.” He shut his eyes and listened closely to the tune as she lathered his hair, somehow it seemed familiar though he couldn't place it. “That sand just got everywhere” she observed as rinsed the soap from his head. “Sorry, I guess I didn't notice.” Tom said opening his eyes again. “Don't apologize” she said holding up a large fluffy towel “That's what I'm here for.” She wrapped him in the towel as he stepped out of the tub, dried him thoroughly, and led him back to his room. She let the towel fall to the ground as she lifted him onto his new changing table. She softly hummed the tune again as she powdered and prepared him for his nightime diaper. Tom searched his mind for anywhere he could have heard it. His extra thick diaper was fastened snuggly around him before he could find the memory. “There's something extra that came with your crib” his mother said retrieving something from the changing table. Tom watched as she held up a footed sleeper printed with little cartoon race cars. “They had a few to choose from” she smiled “and since you like playing with your toy car I picked this one. Would you like to try it on?” She looked at him hopefully. Tom blushed slightly at being the object of his mother's maternal thoughtfulness again. But deep inside it felt right. He smiled and nodded “Good choice mom.” She set him on the ground and helped him into his new PJs. “What do you think?” she said as she zipped up the back. Tom took a moment to feel the padding beneath his feet and soft warm fabric swaddling his body. “It's really comfortable.” “I knew you'd like it” she took a book from the dresser and sat in the rocking chair “How about a bedtime story?” holding her arms out invitingly. Tom smiled and climbed into her lap. It took him a moment to fit himself in comfortably but he found a cozy spot with his head resting on her shoulder and a view the pictures depicting Mortimer Mouse's Moon Mystery. “Mortimer Mouse was getting ready for his trip to the moon” she began as she gently rocked. “Somebody was stealing cheese from the cheese mines and only the world famous detective could find out who.” As she turned each page she held up the pictures for him and Tom listened closely to every word. As they reached the conclusion Mortimer was questioning a strange mouse the space patrol had found sneaking around the moon base. “'I'm a professional moon explorer” she read in a squeaky voice “and I've come here to climb the tallest mountain on the moon: Mons Hadley.'” “'This explorer a fraud and I can prove it.'” She read, giving Mortimer a slightly more distinguished voice “How did Mortimer know?” “I know that one.” Tom smiled “The tallest mountain on the moon is Mons Huygens.” “Let's see” she said as she turned to the last page and read “Mortimer knew that any moon explorer would know that Mons Huygens is tallest mountain on the moon.” She closed the book and smiled at him “Did you learn that at school?” Tom looked down bashfully “Yeah, they're got a Speak-n-Say that has a lot of stuff about astronomy on it.” “That's what you should be doing sweety” she said as she hugged him close and continued rocking “Just play and learn and don't forget that I'll always be here.” Tom just closed his eyes and let her rock him “I know mom.” “Still want the side of your crib down?” She asked. Tom nodded. “Alright, I'll be in to check on you in a bit.” She said as she stood up and set him down. “Thanks mom” Tom yawned. She turned back the sheets and helped him into his crib. “Good night sweety” she said with a kiss on his forehead. “Good night” Tom replied closing his eyes. Soon after she had clicked off the light and closed the door behind her Tom was fast asleep. Sometime during the night he was dimly aware being gently pushed from the edge of the crib being tucked back in. The next morning Tom was sitting on the floor at preschool building a railroad with some of his classmates. He vaguely remembered some of what he'd learned from building the crane with Johnny while he pieced the engine together. Finally he set it down on the completed track and watched with pride as his train chugged steadily around curves and up hills. He was absorbed he barely noticed when Ms. Kelly came by to check his diaper and round him up for story time. He found his place in front of Mrs. Peterson who sat patiently with a book in her lap while the children gathered around here. “Good morning everyone” she said sweetly once they were all assembled. “Good morning Mrs. Peterson” Tom replied in unison with the rest of the class. “Now before we start the story does anybody know what important day is coming up?” She asked. “Founder's day” answered most of the class. “That's right. And who knows what that means?” “It's the day when they started the town.” answered one boy. “That's right Josh” Mrs Peterson replied “And for Founder's Day all your mommies and daddies will come to class. So we're going to learn a new song we can all sing for them.” As his classmates clamored excitedly around him a sense of dread sunk into the pit of Tom's stomach. He'd grown to except so many things in this new life but singing a preschool song in front of an audience was yet another step back. He sat and contemplated a way out while Mrs. Peterson read the morning's story. After story time we was whisked away for a quick change into put down in his crib for naptime. He looked at the bars around him and thought of the one slim outpost of maturity he'd managed to maintain at home. He feared losing more it but as he took hold of his stuffed bunny and closed his eyes he thought about how the comforts of being a preschooler seemed so right. Later that afternoon he exchanged hugs with his mother as she picked up him up from class. “Your teacher says you guys are going to put on a show for us.” She said excitedly “I can't wait to see what you guys are planning.” Tom looked at her smile and abandoned any notion of getting out of it. He just couldn't disappoint her that way. “It's just going to be song.” He said. “Well I'm sure you'll do a great job.” She said taking him by the hand and leading him to the car. Later, before bed being put to bed, he was given his nightly bath and was a story as he cuddled in his mother's lap. During the night he woke up to his mother rolling him back from the edge of the crib. “Just go back to sleep” she whispered as she kissed him on the forehead and smoothed the sheets over him. In the morning Tom ate breakfast while he watched her get ready for the day. “It's a good thing I've been checking on you” she said “You can try sleeping with the side down a little while longer but I may have to find another arrangement OK?” Tom began to object but stopped short. He could see she was serious, and he knew she was right. “OK mom.” He answered. “Good boy” she said “Now let's get you to school.” As Tom sat in the car watching out the window he wondered what the other arrangement could possibly be. And the first of the new chapters Chapter 19 By late morning at preschool Tom had thoroughly engrossed himself in his favorite toys and he felt a twinge of disappointment as his teachers began herding the children together to begin practicing their Founder's Day song. He reluctantly trudged toward the piano where a smiling Mrs. Peterson greeted her students. “OK children” she said clapping her hands together “Today we're going to learn a new song for all our mommies and daddies. Is everybody ready?” Tom looked down at his feet and wished he was somewhere else while his classmates all voiced their enthusiastic ascent. Mrs. Peterson plucked out a few notes on they keyboard and began leading the class through the song. The other preschoolers followed along repeating the lines after her while Tom tried to stay unobtrusively in back, moving his lips but barely paying attention at all. He felt a tug on the strap of his shortalls as Mrs. Hansley pulled him aside to check his diaper. “You don't need a change, why are you so cranky today?” She asked him quietly. “I just don't want to do this song. Can't I do something else?” “Don't be shy.” She said placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder “Think of how proud your mommy will be when she sees you singing.” She turned him back around and knelt beside him. “Just sing along with me.” Tom, knowing he could no longer get away with faking it, finally paid attention to the words. “Concordia parvae res crescunt.” Mrs. Peterson sang. Tom gave Mrs. Hansley a puzzled look. “It's Latin” she explained. “Some of the words are kind of big, just follow along and do your best.” The phrase repeated several time and Tom tried his best to remember and pronounce the words. “Crescat scientia vita excolatur” continued Mrs. Peterson. Tom took a moment to wonder what the kids in higher grades were doing and be thankful this was all he had to face. He struggled on through the rest of the song taking some small comfort in the fact that his classmates had some difficulty as well. The class moved on to snack time and Tom pondered how he'd ever learn this song as he ate his milk and cookies. By the time his mother was taking him home he had a plan, he'd fake sick the day of the performance. He wouldn't embarrass himself stumbling over some preschool song in front of an audience. “So how did the rehearsal go?” She asked as she pulled out of the parking space. “OK I guess he said” he looked over at his mother, the woman who bathed him and changed his diapers, and abandoned his guardedness “Some of the words are really hard. I don't know if I can even remember them.” “You'll do great I'm sure, I'm just so proud of you.” Tom watched out the window for a few moments before turning back to her “Are you really proud of me?” She looked genuinely shocked at his question “Of course I do sweety. You're learning so much and adjusting to all this new stuff so well. I can't wait wait to see you show everybody else too.” “Thanks mom” Tom thought for a moment “I'll do my best for you.” She smiled at him at him and gave his hair a ruffle “I know you will.” His thoughts of faking sick began to melt away. He could almost see himself singing his heart out alongside his fellow preschoolers and making his mother proud. After dinner he sprawled himself out in front of some cartoons and played with his small but burgeoning collection of toys while his mother relaxed with a book. Even if she wasn't actively watching him, knowing she was close gave him a certain peace of mind. She noticed him looking back at her. “Do you need a change?” she asked raising an eyebrow. Tom shook his head “No, I don't think so.” She smirked skeptically and sat down to give him a check. “What do you know? All dry and clean. What were you glancing around for?” Tom laughed at his mother's teasing and shrugged his shoulders “Nothing.” She took one of the straps of his shortalls and rolled him onto his back. Grinning she placed a finger to his side.”Are you sure you don't want to tell me” “Mooom” Tom half-groaned half-laughed. She slid a hand under his shirt and reached under his arm giving him a light tickle. “I'm not really even ticklish anymore” Tom said even as he began to squirm a bit. “Oh really?” She said as she tickled faster. “Then this won't do anything at all” She laughed as she twitched her finger across his skin. Tom resisted momentarily before breaking into giggles and trying to roll away. “You seem pretty ticklish to me.” She said grinning as she withdrew her attack. “Maybe a little bit.” Tom said as he caught his breath. She checked his diaper again “More than just a little” she laughed “It's probably time to get you ready for bed anyway.” She got him out of his newly soaked diaper and into a nice warm tub. “I got something for your room” she said as she started scrubbing his back. “Really, what is it?” “You know how you were worried about putting the sides of your crib up?” “Yeah? “Well I got something that will let me know if you need me for anything.” “You mean a baby monitor?” “Well we can call it a kid monitor if you prefer, but yes. Now lift your arm for me honey” Tom complied and she gently soaped up his side “You don't mind do you?” “I guess not” Tom said resignedly. “Good boy” she said as she squirted a dollop of shampoo into he hand “I know you're probably disappointed about needing these things, but I just want to make sure you're safe. And it can't be that bad knowing I can keep an eye you can it?” Tom looked down, wondering for a moment if she could read his thoughts. She saw the bashful smile creeping across his face “I didn't think so. Now close your eyes.” She lathered his hair. “I need to get you in for a hair cut soon” she commented as she worked. Tom stepped out of the tub and into the warm thick towel his mother was holding. She dried him off and ushered him into his room. She gave him another pass over with the towel before lifting him onto the changing table. Tom was momentarily surprised by the increasing ease with which she was able to help him up. But his attention was soon diverted to the new device sitting on a table next to his crib. “It's got a camera too” She said as she retrieved a thick night-time diaper from the diaper stacker. She slid it under his freshly scrubbed bottom, taped it in place, and dressed him in his Pjs. “Now how about a bedtime story?” She sat in the rocking chair and motioned for him to sit in her lap. He settled in while she took a book from the table “There's one more thing” she said getting one of the bottles he'd had at Mrs. Burke's house from the table as well. “I heard you like these.” “Thank you” Tom said slightly embarrassed but thankful for the treat. She began to rock gently as she held the nursing boy in her arms and read from the colorful pages. Tom barely followed the story. He was tired and the rocking was already lulling him to sleep. She paused “Are you ready for bed sweety? We can finish this book later.” Tom just nodded and rubbed his eyes. Karen smiled “OK, up you go.” She rose from the rocking chair, helped him into his crib. Through the encroaching fuzziness of sleep Tom again noticed how easily she did this, his own effort was scarcely required. She pulled the blankets up to his shoulders and after making sure his teddy was within reach she handed him his still half-full bottle. “Now if you need me you can just call alright?” “OK mom.” Tom replied. “Good night.” She kissed him the forehead and raised the rails into place. “Good night mom” Tom said nestling himself into place. She turned off the lights on the way out the door and Tom was left gazing through half-closed eyes at the dimly glowing light from his baby monitor. He could remember a time it would have been an unbearable intrusion. Now he seemed adrift in and endless sea of babyhood and the idea of there even being a shore faded further away every day. Some part of him still wanted to be a big kid to the outside world, but here at home this felt right. He drank from his bottle while he contemplated these things and was disappointed when the sweet warm formula ran out. He let the empty bottle roll from his hand as he fell asleep. Some time in the middle of the night he came half awake and found a full bottle in its place. He smiled as he took it to his lips.
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Good day dear reader. This is a scene that could be used in various settings. Deliberately, no names have been mentioned, nor have any details been given about how it is done*. The main focus is on the experience itself, the core moment represented by this scene. The story is about role reversal and regression. Full use of diapers is implied (includes messing), but not described in too much detail. We have a male main character, from which perspective the story takes place. He has some kind of ability that allows him to bring others under his mental control and issue orders that permanently change their behavior. *It’s quite similar to hypnosis and this could be the answer to the how. However, it could just as well be a superpower, a special drug or anything else. It’s up to your imagination :D Finally, I have him where I wanted him to be. For his unreasonable and childish behavior, I hold him responsible. If he wants to behave like a baby, he should be put back into diapers. The thought sends a pleasant shimmer down my spine. Now let’s get to work: “You feel so small, so little. Yes, that’s right, you’re just a small baby boy. You belong into diapers; you love the infantile feeling of wearing them. You will notice that you will be unable to cum outside of your diapers. Only wearing your infantile clothes, you may make cummies. You know what the potty is, you know that grown-ups use it, but not you.” Closing the last tapes of the diaper around his crotch, I continue, “When I snap my fingers, you will concentrate all your thoughts of resistance and poop them out. Right into your diaper where they belong. With every push, you will feel my control taking over permanently. With every push you will feel your adulthood slipping away, your ability to get hard outside your infantile prison. As you go poopy, you will feel your potty-training vanishing. First your control over your bladder and as the warmth spreads around your baby dick you will feel your bowl control vanishing too. As you smell what you push out into your diaper, a sudden urge to suckle on something will overcome you. It will stay with you forever. When you finished soiling yourself and your diaper sags under its weight, you know that it is all gone.” With a sadistic smile, I snap my fingers. With increasing arousal, I watch the show. With delight I watch the knowledge leave his eyes as his diaper starts to fill up with squelching sounds. Soon joined by a hissing sound as he poops out his bladder control ... A couple of days later: She was naked, with only a thin diaper around her legs, swinging her hips in a hypnotizing way. “You are a naughty little boy, enjoying the sight of my diapered pussy.” I had to agree, my member getting harder every moment. With a mischievous grin, she orders, “Say it!” My cheeks brightly flushed I answer, “I’m a naughty little baby boy!” With a predatory gaze she states, “Yes, you are a baby boy! Do you know what baby boys should wear?” This is my darkest fantasy coming true, I can’t resist answering, “A diaper, I should wear a thick diaper to catch my accidents!” This seems to satisfy her, as she grabs my requested diaper from nearby. Opening it up and patting it invitingly for me to come to sit in it. I quickly free myself from my pants, presenting my fully erect member. With a seductive voice she suggests, “There is someone eager to get into his diaper. Come over here and let yourself be changed by Mommy.” I can’t resist complying and crawl over to the fluffy garment calling to me. I place myself reverently on the infantile garment, a bit pre-cum dropping from my erect shaft as she closes it around my member. This is heaven, what I always dreamed of. As I give up more control to her, she praises me, “You did well baby boy. Follow mommy’s commands and I will allow you to make fantastic baby cummies for me. You know you crave them, but before we come to that …” What, what is it? The suspense is too much and I ask, “What do I need to do?” With a honeyed voice, she responds, “You need to become a good baby boy, but you were quite naughty, so we need to fix that first.” She makes a small pause, looking at my last victim, which is crawling on the floor in a yellowed diaper. A former adult, which I turned into an adult baby. He watches me with a gleeful expression as Mommy continues, “Did he ask you to regress him?” With a gulp, I answer, “No, he didn’t.” In an accusing tone she continues, “But you made him this way anyway and we both know that you enjoyed the process very much.” I glance away in shame, thinking back on how aroused I became. How I changed into a diaper afterward, envisioning myself in his position as I started to fill it with my own stinky mush. The feeling of warm mass spreading at the back of my diaper as I made baby cummies in the front. Yes, she is right, I’m really just a naughty baby boy. With tears in my eyes, I look at her for salvation. My arousal still increasing, as I realize deep down where this is going. With a victorious smile full of confidence she states, “There is only one way to atone for your sin and becoming my good baby boy. Tell me what you are willing to give!” I want to resist, to stop this whole thing, but I am too deep under her control. My dick is throbbing in anticipation, as my resistance melts away. In panic, I look over to anybody for help, but the only thing I see is my former victim, watching me with a satisfied grin as I succumb to the same fate. With a pathetic whimper, my resistance breaks, my dick nearly bursting from pleasure, as I respond, “I will give up my adulthood.” With a predatory look, she caresses my infantile dick through the diaper, praising with a honeyed voice, “Such a good boy, getting rid of his adulthood for me. Say the words dear.” She has absolute control and I’m just a little baby boy. I … I wanna be a good boy, I want to make cummies for mommy! My mind feels like it is coated into a soft pink blanket, as I say the words, “When you snap your fingers, I will concentrate all my big boy thoughts and poop them out. Right into my diapee where they belong. With every push I will feel myself slipping more and more into infanthood; my ability to get hard outside my beloved diapers vanishing. As I go poopy, I will feel my potty-training vanishing. First my control over my pee-pees and as the warmth spreads around my baby dick, I will feel my control over my poopies go bye, bye as well. As I smell my mess, all my grown-up words go bye, bye too. When I finish going poopy for Mommy, I will know that it is all gone for good.” Mommy looks sooo proud of me, as she snaps her fingers ...
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- regression
- male
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Long time reader of diaper stories, first time actually trying to write one. Let me know what you think. -------------- "Okay, well, here we are." Matt turned the car off, smiling over at his boyfriend, who hadn't dared to look up from his lap. Connor breathed a deep sigh, and Matt drummed his fingers on the steering wheel to fill the silence. "Come on, it's good to be home, yeah? You've been waiting for this moment for months. Come on, this is a happy moment!" Connor didn't feel like engaging in the happy banter as his boyfriend grabbed his crutches out of the back of the car. About 3 months ago he'd left this house, excited for his 21st birthday celebrations. He had it all, the beautiful boyfriend, a home of their own, an amazing group of friends. He was in the prime of his youth, and was headed out to experience it all, when their uber driver had taken a turn a little bit too quickly, and sent the car rolling. Matt had escaped with a mild concussion and some scratches - Connor had come away with a spinal injury. The doctors had told him that he was lucky that it wasn't a complete spinal injury, and he still had movement and sensation of his legs - albeit it didn't feel lucky to Connor. Matt opened his car door and helped him to his feet, shoving his crutches into his hands to help him hold his weight. He'd been told leaving the hospital that he should practice using his wheelchair while he underwent physiotherapy to help him with his walking, but even then that wasn't a complete solution. He was forever bound a cripple - spending his days shuffling along painfully slowly on his crutches, or being pushed around by somebody who was a lot stronger than he was. He was aware that Matt had slowed down his pace to match his own as they headed up to the front door. It didn't help that he could feel that he was wet. On top of his newfound mobility issues, he now found himself burdened with permanent incontinence issues as well. A catheter would have been bearable, but considering that his bowel had torn during the accident - he was now permanently stuck wearing diapers too. It had been barely tolerable when it was faceless hospital nurses who changed him while he was barely conscious. Now he was home, he was going to have to do it himself. Matt smiled again as he pushed the door open to their townhouse. "Welcome home." Connor couldn't help but smirk slightly as he glanced around at the handful of helium balloons and home-drawn 'welcome home connor' banner that had been hung on the staircase railing. Fuck, Matt could be pretty cute sometimes. He was blushing, nervously rubbing the back of his neck as he smiled at his boyfriend. "I know you were kinda scared, so, I just, I thought I could maybe make it nicer for you?" Connor laughed. "It's cute, babe. Thank you." The two were interrupted by a banging at the door, and Connor glanced over. Matt answered it, an older woman with dark brown hair and a big bundle of flowers standing here. "I'm so sorry for intruding, but I saw the car in the drive and I heard that you were coming home today!" She bubbled. "We've missed you!" Cassandra had been their neighbour for as long as they'd lived here. Sure, she could be a bit nosy at times, and loved talking shit about the other neighbours in their complex, but she had always been kind to the two and raced over to give Connor a tight hug. "Look at you! Standing on your own again! So glad you're home, somebody needs to keep an eye on Matt after all!" Matt rolled his eyes playfully. "Apparently I play my teen bop music too loud." "Oh my god." Connor snorted. "Of course that's what you were doing while I was in hospital." For a brief moment, it was like everything was normal again. Laughing about Matt's obscure pop music tastes, standing in their living room. Connor smiled, until the worst thing that could possibly happen, seemed to want to start happening. The accident may have taken his bowel and bladder function, but it hadn't taken his sensation in those areas. His eyes widened as he felt his sphincter start to open - completely and utterly helpless against his body's wishes right now. He wanted to run, desperately, find the cold porcelain of a toilet seat and do his business in private- where it was meant to be. But there were no options for him here - his legs were barely functional, and all he could do was shift them slightly so here was more room between them for what was about to occur. He gripped his crutches, hard, and focused on keeping his balance and trying to pretend that he was absolutely not shitting his pants in this moment. "Hey, are you okay?" Matt glanced over at his boyfriend, concern dotting his eyes as he noticed the sudden stress he seemed to be under. "Fine." Connor barely managed, glancing down at the floor as the beginnings of a large log began to exit him. He farted, loudly, and he wished the floor would swallow him up right now. Cassandra was playing the polite neighbour and very clearly pretending that she didn't hear anything - probably out of sympathy - but it did nothing to help the situation. The log pushed against the padding of his diaper, soft and squishy and spreading out over his butt. His face went bright red as it pinched off, sliding down into the seat and settling there as smaller pieces also began to enter. "O-Oh-" Cassandra flushed bright red as she began to realise what was happening "Oh my- I, I should go-" "P-Please." Connor choked, trying desperately not to cry. This was not the time for seemingly the biggest shit he had ever done in his life. Matt ushered her out the door while Connor finished, the final piece landing in the disgusting mess that had just filled his diaper. He doubted that the skinny jeans that he was wearing hid any of his shame, and he stood in his living room as his eyes filled with tears. This is what he was now - a disgusting fucking cripple who shat himself in front of his neighbours. Matt quickly ran back to his boyfriend's aid, and gently grabbed his shoulders. "Hey, hey, don't freak out, okay? Please, it's okay. We knew this was going to happen, we're gonna sort it out, you're okay, yeah?" "S-She-" "She's not going to tell anyone, she understands. You just got home from the hospital, if it's ever understandable, that day is today. Let's, let's get you to the bathroom, and we'll clean you up, yeah?" Connor would have definitely protested his boyfriend helping him with such a task any other time, but he was in so much shock from what had just occurred that all he could manage was a nod. Matt smiled at him, trying to reassure the poor man, and held a hand on Connor's back as they started the slow shuffle to the bathroom, just in case he tripped. God, moving in a shit-filled diaper was even worse than shitting in it to begin with. Even though his 'walk' was barely classified as movement, it seemed to shift the mass in his diaper into every little possible crevice, even ones he didn't know existed. The smell began to waft too, as he started moving, and he felt like he was going to vomit. This was the most disgusting thing he'd ever done in his entire life, and he'd be doing it for the rest of his entire life. "That's it, almost there." Matt whispered encouragements as they reached the bathroom. Now was not the time to look at the accessibility renovations that had been made while Connor was gone - and instead he just gently followed Matt's lead as a rubber matt was laid on the floor, and he was laid down onto it. "I-I'm sorry, I d-don't-" Connor choked, staring up at the ceiling. "Hey, you don't have to be sorry, baby. I'm gonna help you, alright. We're gonna get through this, together." Connor sniffled. "D-Do you know what you're doing?" Matt smiled. "You forget my Mom used to own a daycare. I've changed thousands of diapers, alright? I know what I'm doing. You're in safe hands. Although, we might have to buy you some new pants." Connor nodded in agreement. He'd always had a nice ass, he'd known that for a long time, and wore the tightest skinny jeans he could find to show it off. Now, all they showed off was his shame. At least Matt seemed to be prepared - the cupboard under the sink which used to only gather dust now held creams, powders, all sorts of things that were needed for changes, including a big stack of diapers. His diapers, Connor reminded himself miserably. Matt seemed to be pretending that this was the most normal thing in the world - whistling to himself as he put on some rubber gloves and unbuttoned Connor's jeans. "I-I'm gonna learn to do this myself, y-yeah." Connor said outloud, not sure if he was asking himself a question, or desperately holding onto hope. "I know, you are. But right now, I'm just here to help, okay?" Matt repeated. "And I'll always be here to help." "Because changing your 21-year-old crippled boyfriend's baby diapers is what everyone wants to do." Connor muttered. "Hey, come on. Don't talk like this. I can make this special for you." Matt untaped the front of the diaper and opened it, the terrible stench filling the entire bathroom. Connor retched. "Special?!" "Woah, Stinker, slow down." Matt chuckled. "I gotta clean you first." The baby wipes were cold against his skin, but they were certainly softer and better quality than the ones that the nurses had used in the hospital. He didn't dare make eye contact with his boyfriend, instead staring at the ceiling and letting his mind go to static instead of dealing with the thoughts that were clouding him. That was, until soft fingers with a handful of cream ran up and down his shaft. "Woah, woah, what are you doing?!" "Diaper cream! I told you I could make it special." Matt smiled, a cheeky glimmer in his eyes. "I haven't seen your cock in months, of course I want to play with it." "A-Ah-" During his DIAPER change?! Was he crazy? It was the most un-sexy enviroment he could imagine - lying here on the bathroom floor. But then again, he hadn't gotten off in 3 months, and he wasn't about to dare to tell Matt to stop. "Y-You're gonna make me-" "And I think you want to." Matt teased, increasing the speed of his 'massage'. "Come on." Connor came, a silent crescendo filling his ears as months of sexual frustration became undone. Matt laughed softly, grabbed a wipe to clean up the mess, and finished taping up a clean diaper onto his boyfriend. It was a lot thicker than the hospital diapers that he had originally been sent home with, but no good boyfriend would let his partner walk around in something that prone to leakages. And besides, even though any mention of this to Connor right now would only embarrass him, he looked cute as hell with a little diaper boulder. "T-Thank you." Connor's cheeks flushed red once again as Matt helped him to his feet. "Really, I-" "Don't worry about it, baby." Matt smiled, running a hand through the shorter boy's curly hair. "I really mean it when I said that we would get though this together. I've got your back, always." Connor looked down at his shoes, biting his lip anxiously. "Promise?" "I promise." Matt smiled. "Now, c'mon, we've got dinner to cook." Connor grinned. That was exactly the normalcy he needed right now.
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This is going to be a little side story, something to write on the side for my Traveler story. A focus of romance, sexuality, growing as a person, and whatever tropes will come to mind with this story. Updates will likely be a bit slower (or perhaps not), but I just wanted to try a different approach to my only other ABDL work. --- Chapter One: Moving Out There comes the point in life when you realize just how much you value privacy or recognize the lack thereof. The older you get, the more apparent it becomes just how much it means to your sanity. It’s those sobering moments that drive people to recognize the need to do something about it. But it also causes one to determine that having it from time to time isn’t good enough now. For James Smith, that moment came around when he was 24 years old. The catalyst for this decision came after his hand was forced by a particular event and made James finally leave his parent’s home for good. To understand both the decision and event, one needed to understand that James was an adult-baby. This wasn’t a recent discovery; he had known for years, since before puberty, that he liked diapers and being treated like a baby. However, his ‘vice’ became increasingly deviant, and upon becoming a young-adult, his urges became more extravagant. When James finally had the chance to wear diapers again, at the age of 16 and during a time when he had the house to himself for two weeks, he found himself in a diapered induced, horny haze. There was no going back after having tasted that particular forbidden fruit. But as he got older and explored his fetish, James found himself growing increasingly curious at certain sub-fetishes of being an ABDL, which lead him down a bizarre rabbit hole. He learned very few peculiar things about himself by the time he was 21. James wanted a mommy to dominate him, to baby him, to humiliate him. He wanted to be treated from a newborn to a little boy. James found himself increasingly into the idea of roleplaying being forced into diapers, losing his adult privileges, and having an adult-mommy in his life. He was a submissive man. However, he tempered his expectations and considered his situation’s reality, namely that fantasy was all well and good. Still, he also wanted to be a man for his woman. Call it male pride or ego, but James understood the value of having a partner first and an adult-mommy second. Unfortunately for James, he never did learn how to go out on dates. He was still a virgin by the time he was 24. That left him minimal options to remove the pressure of sexual desire, namely via his diapers and erotic roleplaying. At 24, James had the money to pull this off. He graduated college with a degree in computer design and programming. He became a freelance programmer, working his way out of the hell that was the “z” tier ranks of code-monkeys actually to become a “c” ranker, that was someone both trusted and reliable. Living at home meant he didn’t have to pay for much, and he had been freelancing for years, and with more significant contracts meant he had considerable cash on hand. So it was easy to get what he wanted. No, the hard part was finding a place to hide it and time to wear and enjoy his purchases. His parents hardly ever left the house, and the most recent events resulted in everyone being cooped up in their homes. James ultimately stored his diapers and other infantile paraphernalia away, hidden from the world and his view. He could only fantasize and masturbate about the next chance he would get to wear and act out his desires. However, as the world got back to normal, James found himself increasingly agitated at how his parents continued to move about his room without his permission. It was a problem and one that finally compounded into what caused him to leave eventually. James had been out with some friends. They enjoyed a movie, a nice meal and then sat down to smoke a few bowls of weed. James had initially planned on staying the night, but a nagging feeling in the back of his mind caused him to withhold from partaking in the evening’s festivities. He drove back home, expecting nothing much to have happened. He was confused when he pulled into the family garage to see several boxes of what looked to be old computer parts, toys, clothes, books, and other knickknacks that James didn’t use when he recalled where those came from exactly. The realization that the came from his closet, which had a box containing almost a dozen diapers, a vibrating wand, and other adult-sized baby items, caused him to start panicking. His parents had to have seen the contents, and they would, of course, want to know why James had them in his room. Yet as he internally panicked, his mother came out into the garage all smiles, “Oh, James? I thought you were going to be out all night. Well, welcome back. I hope you don’t mind, but I just got started taking out a few of those old boxes in your closet.” Her calm tone gave James hope that she hadn’t discovered his embarrassing secret. He barely said hi as he not-so-subtly raced to his room and quickly saw a host of piled boxes. None of them was the one carrying his diaper stash. That was still safely tucked away in the back of the closet. James felt relief like no other, and as he sat on his bed and finally felt like he could breathe again, he came to terms with just how close that was to become an incredibly awkward conversation. Whatever gods blessed him with the foresight to not smoke with his friends and come back home gave him the biggest of all passes. And that caused him to recognize that it was time to start reevaluating what he could do in this situation. He wasn’t going to stop, no chance of that. No chance in hell he would tell his parents that he wanted to wear diapers around the house, fuck that. Well, the choice became obvious. The following day, James talked to his parents and informed them that he wanted to move out. His parents seemed almost relieved to hear him say that and were a tad too excited when they told him that they would help him. They did, however, ask him what brought this on. James could only respond by saying, “Well, first time for everything, right?” When his parents said that they’d help him, they’d do everything for James to find his first place. And as it were, they had someone, an old family friend, that owned a bunch of homes in San Jose. They had a small but charming home that they could sell to his family at what amounted to a steal in Silicon Valley, at some place called Applegrove. It sounded like a retirement community, or something. Still, James laughed at the idea of having a home in Silicon Valley to himself. So James was floored when his parents actually bought it for him, making James a homeowner in one fell swoop at 24. If he didn’t know any better, he almost thought his parents wanted him out of their house. They claimed that it was an excellent investment when James wanted to move out someday, and besides, it would pay itself off in the future. James knew then that there was no going back. That was when another series of “firsts” started to fall into his lap—the first time moving out—the first time setting up a mortgage payment, automatic payment for multiple bills, learning about homeowners insurance, and homeowner laws. Then he had to buy furniture, electronics, new carpeting, and check on everything else in the house to make sure it wasn’t a total wreck. A thousand little things made James recognize the irony of his situation. He wanted to leave so he could enjoy his adult-baby lifestyle in peace, and instead, he had more grown-up responsibilities now. It wasn’t until almost eight months had passed that James finally settled into his new home. His parents were so proud of him, granted he hadn’t done anything other than sign some paperwork and paid a few deposits. His mother and father had arranged just about everything. His parents stayed for a few days before they finally took off, giving him a hug and kiss, instructions for him to call them every few days and report back any problems, and that they were only an hour away if he needed anything. James waved them goodbye and watched them drive off. As he closed the door, James took a moment to look around at his home. The house itself wasn’t that old, made in the early 90s, and had only a few tenants that lived in it. It was pretty spacious for a bachelor’s first home, but considering how his family got it for a steal and the going rate was just for a crummy apartment, James was thankful. Even so, the enormity of the situation set in, and James felt a bit overwhelmed. This was also the first time he would be away from his parents for longer than a few days. That this might be for the rest of his life now caused James to feel quite anxious. For most of his life, he lived close to his family. Even when he was going to college, he had only a thirty-minute drive to and from his school’s campus. Most of his friends were also far away now. It wasn’t like he was an entire world away. His parent’s home was about an hour’s drive at max. Still, he felt uneasy. James spent the next hour finishing up his unpacking. Just about all the necessary components were ready now. His computer, which was effectively his lifeline and cost a small fortune, was essential to unbox. But as soon as he finished that, James saw one other box that caught his attention. “Right...the whole reason I’m here.” James had no time to wear his diapers or act out as a baby these last few months. All he had time for was his masturbation fantasies. It was easy to think about how much fun and freedom that he could have with an entire house to himself. It was easy to imagine that he could walk around freely in just his diapers or baby clothes, that he could stack his dressers and closest with a not-so-small stash of diapers and display them for as long as he wanted to. But why stop there? James could have baby-toys lying out in the open, pacifiers all around the house, baby-bottles sitting in the kitchen cabinets, and he could have the TV playing whatever juvenile cartoon or pornographic video he wanted too. Nothing was stopping him now...that started echoing through his head while his other “head” began to harden at the prospect. James’ face felt hot as he blushed, and his hands trembled as he opened up the box, displaying several ABU peekabu’s, a couple of stuffers, his “magic wand,” his changing supplies, and a few other personal items. A goofy smile adorned his face as he started to strip his clothes and then grabbed everything before heading towards his bed. However, he stopped as he realized that he didn’t need to diaper himself inside his room. It was his house! He could do it wherever he wanted to! So instead, he decided to roleplay this out in his mind. The first thing that James did was find a nice spot in the middle of his new living room, placed a soft blanket down, then his diapers and supplies, before heading to the front door of all places. James felt positively silly as he closed his eyes and pretended that he wasn’t a young man that just entered his new house...but an adult-baby being carried into his first home by a mommy like a newborn. She was cooing at him, saying that this was his home now, and he was safe. “Is Baby James excited to be in his new home? I bet he is! But we need to get him into a nice and fresh diaper!” A soothing and maternal voice spoke to him in his mind as James started to walk towards the living room, naked as the day he was born, here and in his fantasy. He gave a few awkward pretend cries, trying to act like a baby for the moment. It felt so lame in his head, but he wanted to enjoy the weirdness of the moment. Besides, who cared if he was acting weird here? It was his home now, his safe space. As he slowly and carefully made his way over into the living room, he lowered himself onto the unfolded diaper. James felt the soft, crinkly padding under his bottom and giggled. Opening his eyes, he grabbed the container of powder and started to sprinkle the sweet-smelling substance of his erect cock and slowly rubbed it in his crotch, savoring it. He even went the extra mile and poured a little on his stomach, making sure that the smell of baby powder lingered. “Does Jamesy love the smell of baby powder? Now he smells just like a baby! Time for the diaper!” The woman in his fantasy kept encouraging him, and James gladly worked on putting on the garment of his desires. He had to push his penis down to ensure that he got the diaper’s front over it before working on the tapes. Out of everything, James wished he had someone in his life to engage in this babyplay. No matter how much fun he had with solo stuff, it just wasn’t the same thing as what he read in stories or seen in videos. A human connection, companionship, that was what he wanted. But right now, he was stuck with this fantasy. At the very least, he had home to enjoy it in privacy, and with that in mind, James finished fixing the tapes of the diaper and checking the leak guards. He was diapered, safe and secured, and felt babyish. The first act inside his new home, getting diapered in the living room. So as James lay there, he closed his eyes again and kept imagining he was just a baby, diapered by his imaginary mommy, laying on his changing mat, and giggling and cooing like the infant he wanted to be. Again, it was all so silly, but it made James feel comfortable in his new home. And as he placed his thumb in his mouth, rubbing his legs together to hear the crinkling of his diaper, James got it in his head that maybe he should enjoy himself as he wanted and that it was time to place a few orders. As he got up, he kept giggling as he waddled back towards his room. First, he’d get on a few websites such as Etsy and order a few unique objects of interest, then he’d look up some decent mommy-dommy porn and rub himself through his diaper, and then he’d see about having some dinner. “Hmm, maybe I should try some of those hypnosis files as well?” Such thoughts echoed through his mind as he sat on his bed and opened up his Chromebook. The next few days would be full of anxious anticipation. The genie was out of the bottle. There was nothing him now. James was going to start his full-time adult-baby life. --- The only unrealistic part in this entire story is going to be that someone like James was able to own a home in San Jose or anywhere near the Valley at his age and job, but thank god for rich parents, right? In any case, this highlights probably something a lot of people here would want to do upon getting their home and with enough disposable income to indulge in things.
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Subscribe to our patreon for access to exclusive captions and stories from only $1!https://www.patreon.com/femdiapers PART I ‘Urghhhh.’ Fred Groaned as he pressed his hands tightly into his groin. Just moments ago he had been banging on the bathroom door begging for his sister Violet to hurry up so he could use it. Unfortunately it was the only toilet in the house of three he shared with his younger sister and mother. Normally he would have no problem holding his bladder for this long. Except that now his sister was going through toilet training she would spend an absurd amount of time waiting on the toilet. Finally the door opened but it was Fred’s mother that stepped out into the hallway. “She won’t be much longer Fred, can’t you hold it?” “I have been holding it, for the last fifteen MINUTES.” He shouted exacerbated. Fred’s mother chuckled to herself as she watched her ‘grown up’ son doing a toddlers potty dance. “Fifteen minutes, that’s pitiful! Surely at your age you can manage to hold on for longer than that. Are you really that desperate?” Fred didn’t respond merely nodded as he danced on the spot. “If you’re that desperate I think I have a solution, come with me. Violet you will have to manage by yourself for a moment I’ve got a big baby here that needs my help with the potty.” His mother called out to his sister. Fred didn’t care to give a response he was too focused on not wetting his pants. His mother led him down the hallway and they turned into his sister’s room. Definitely the epitome of a girly girl’s room, it was painted pink and covered in princess posters. Dolls and other toys and been scattered around the room haphazardly during Violet’s latest play session. A changing table was pushed to the side of the room, now doubling up as a cushioned table top for all her stuffed animals. Fred’s mother stepped up to the chest of drawers and removed a couple of items which she held in either hand. “We’ve got two options Fred. Either I can hold one of Violet’s training pants for you while you pee or I can put one of these pee pads on the floor that we use for Violets bed and you can go on that. It’s your choice.” Fred sized up his options, he felt both were equally humiliating and degrading but perhaps there was a lesser of the two evils. “Can’t I just go outside, I’ll be quick I promise no one will see me.” “You already know the answer to that and its no. Our neighbours are already nosy and gossipy enough without seeing my grown son peeing in the backyard like a dog. Who knows what they will say about me. Now decide quickly, else you can just pee in your pants.” His mother said getting frustrated. Fred knew what the answer would be but it didn’t hurt to ask. “Why do you have to hold the pull up against me can’t you just let me do that.” “What, and have you miss and pee all over the carpet? No chance.” She told Fred. Fred suddenly felt a small burst of pee shoot into his underpants. He clutched down as hard as he could. “I’ll use the pee pad.” He said desperately. His mother returned the pull up to the drawers and unfolded the disposable mat before placing it on the floor below Fred. She watched him as he frantically tried to shuffle out of his pants without letting go of his crotch. “Here just let me do it.” His mother told him. To Fred’s shock she reached down the front of his jeans and grabbed hold of his penis. She brushed his hands aside and pulled down his pants and underwear in one smooth motion. He quickly stepped out of them and waited for his mother to release him. “No you can sit on the pad otherwise you will splash pee everywhere.” Fred relented and allowed his mother to lower him to the floor. He sat with his legs spread on the middle of the pad. The second she let go of his penis a torrent of pee sprayed out like a broken faucet. It quickly soaked into the pad and pooled around his leg and bum soaking his lower half in pee. He wasn’t sure if his facial expression showed more shock or relief after holding his bladder for so long. Finally the stream came to a stop; it had managed to soak almost the entire length and width of the pad but thankfully it had prevented any from staining the carpet. Fred breathed a sigh of relief and tilted his head upright; suddenly aware his mother was still in the room and had witnessed the entire humiliating display. He saw a satisfied grin on her face, but that wasn’t the problem. No the issue was the phone in her hand she had used to record the whole thing. After much protesting and complaining Fred’s mother finally deleted the video but not before she had sent a copy to her sister. She told him that his Auntie Julia had seen it but she had promised that she wouldn’t show anyone and had deleted the humiliating video of him already. To say he was relieved was an understatement. If his cousin Mary were to have seen it there would be no telling how she would have reacted. Especially since they both attended the same college he wouldn’t have put it past her to tell all his friends but thankfully it was gone for good. PART II It was now the weekend Fred had seen Mary at college and she gave no inclination that she knew about the incident. He had to tip toe carefully around the subject to avoid revealing that something humiliating had happened to him, in case she pressured his mother or hers into telling her. It was a massive relief especially since Mary and his Auntie Julia were now at his house for dinner. They had just finished eating the main course and were about to start desert when Fred excused himself to go to the bathroom. He made his way there and was about to close the door behind him when Mary suddenly appeared and pushed her way in. “What are you doing? I have to use the bathroom.” Fred asked. “But I thought you didn’t use the bathroom, don’t you use your pee pad?” Mary asked Fred. Fred looked at her wide eyed; she had a sinister grin planted right across her face. “I…I don’t know what you are talking about.” Fred stammered. “Oh you don’t do you? Well maybe you will recognise this.” Mary pulled out her phone and began to play the video that his mother and aunt both swore they deleted before anyone else saw. “But, how did you-.” “Oh it was luck really.” Mary said cutting Fred off. “I was transferring some photos off of mum’s phone; she has the better camera so I often use hers when I’m taking a new profile picture. When all of a sudden I hear a little ding, I would never normally read through mum’s messages but the start of the sentence popped up on the screen and I couldn’t resist.” Mary paused to show Fred a screenshot she had taken. ‘Poor little Freddie couldn’t hold it, look at his expression when he uses his sisters pee pad!’ His mother’s message had read accompanied by some crying/laughing emojis. “Of course once I saw that message I immediately watched the video and send that along with the screenshot to my phone. Then to clear any wrong doings I simply deleted the sent message from mum’s phone to mine. I had to wait for your mum to send another message through so it would come up as unread before I told mum that her phone was beeping. That’s why she believed me when I told her I had no idea what it said.” Mary stood triumphantly, feeling like a detective after explaining how she had gotten away with it. Fred looked quite the opposite though as he stood their looking defeated and upset. “Please don’t show anyone at college Mary, I’ll be the laughing stock of our year and I’ll never get a girlfriend.” “To me it doesn’t look like you need a girlfriend. I think what you need is a mummy.” She said playfully squeezing his cheek. “What can I do to make you delete that off your phone and keep it a secret?” Fred asked hopefully. “Hmmmm, now that you mention it there is one thing you can do. If I had my own video of the incident well then that means I could delete this one. So how about we go to your sisters room and we can recreate the first video except this time I will catch the whole thing from start to finish. You need to go to the bathroom anyway so this works out perfectly.” “That makes no sense at all, you’ll still have a video except this time it will be worse because it would look like I wanted to do it.” Fred said trying to reason with her. “But this way you will have my word that I won’t tell a soul, it will just be between you and me.” Mary said as she rubbed his shoulder. “No, it’s not happening; please just think of something else.” Fred said pulling her hand away. “I’m calling your bluff, if you show anyone what happened then you would get in so much trouble from our parents. You can tease me, do whatever, but just don’t show anyone.” Fred pushed Mary out of the bathroom and shut the door. He finished his business then stepped out into the hall half expecting Mary to still be there. He made his way back to the dining room to finish his desert. Mary returned shortly after Fred did. She was probably waiting in my room to scare me or something he thought to himself. Once desert was finished Mary quickly offered to help Fred’s mother with the dishes, while he sat down on the lounge with his Auntie and Violet to decide on a film to watch. Eventually they settled on a romantic comedy that Fred wasn’t too thrilled about, but he wasn’t going to argue it. Just as they were about to start the film Mary and his mother re-entered the room. “I just need to run the shops before they shut you can start the film without me.” His mother announced. His Aunt Julia got up and stopped her at the door. From what Fred could see it looked like his mother showed her something on the phone which caused both ladies to laugh. His Aunt waved his mum off before shutting the door. Strange Fred thought to himself; he couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling that something was going on, especially after he turned to see Mary smiling at him. She was glaring so intently that it definitely made him suspicious. Eventually he put the matter out of his mind as he attempted to follow along with the sappy film. PART III Finally Fred’s mother arrived back home. “Fred, can you please come with me for a moment.” She said as she re-entered the house, clutching a paper bag. She probably just needs help putting something away he assumed. Fred followed her as she led him into his sister’s bedroom. Strange, why did she need his help in there he wondered. As he entered the room behind her he stopped dead in his tracks. The thing that had frozen him in place lay in the centre of the room. Someone had pissed on one of the disposable pads and left it in the same spot as the one he had used last week. “I…Is this a joke.” He scoffed. “You tell me? Mary went to the bathroom just after you did but you weren’t in there. After she finished she said that the light was left on in here and the door was open. She went to close it on her way back and saw that lying on the floor. She told me when we were cleaning up after dinner, she didn’t want to bring it up during desert and embarrass you.” Fred stared wide eyed at his mother. There was no way she actually believed Marys lies was there. “That’s not true at all, why would I do that, she’s lying to you. She saw the video before Aunt Julia deleted it and she was trying to set me up so she could embarrass me.” “For starters, your aunt assured me that no one had seen the video, the message was unread when she clicked on it and she deleted it straight after. Second, so what you’re telling me is that your cousin would go as far as to pee on one herself in order to frame you. What exactly would she gain from that?” She said crossing her arms. Fred tried to think of a way out of this mess. He could get her to look at Violets phone then she would see the video. But there was no way she would be that stupid to still have it on there. If he accused her of that and there was no video it would only make him look worse. There had to be something he could do. But as he stood there desperately trying to think of something all he could do was stammer, as his eyes started to get watery he sniffled. “Shhhhhhh, there, there, I’m not mad at you I promise; there’s no need to be upset.” Fred’s mother said, wrapping her arms around to comfort him. “I didn’t realize you enjoyed using your pee pad so much. I’ve told you before you can always talk to me about these things. Clearly you wanted someone to find you had used it. Why else would you leave the light in the room on and have it lying out in the open. You knew one of us would find it and say something.” Fred didn’t bother trying to argue with her, what was the point. Especially after seeing his reaction to the situation, no matter what he did she would never believe him over Mary. “I have something that will cheer you up, but I want you to trust me ok?” Mary brought Fred’s attention to the paper bag she still had clutched in one hand. She pulled out a large packet of what looked like adult diapers. “I only got you the one bag to get started, but this should last you at least a few days and then you can come with me to pick out some more.” “W…why would you buy me DIAPERS.” Fred yelled in disbelief. “Because sweetie, now you can take your pee pad with you wherever you go! From now on you will always have one tightly wrapped around your waist. No more having to sneak off to your sister’s room to use one, you can just let go wherever and whenever you want. I made sure to get you the extra thick ones too; so these should hold a few of your wees, but make sure to tell me as soon as you have a messy, we wouldn’t want you getting diaper rash.” Fred looked at his mother who was smiling warmly back at him. There was no malice or anger she really thought this is what he wanted. The embarrassment took over and he started bawling his eyes out. “Awww, sweetie everything will be fine once we get you into a nice cosy diaper.” Fred’s mother cooed. She took charge and removed Fred’s shirt, he offered no resistance as she continued. She removed his pants and underpants together once again in that same smooth motion. Fred was complacent as his mother gently laid him down onto his sister’s bed. His bottom came into contact with the soft padding of the diaper that she had placed under him. He closed his eyes and sobbed as he felt the cool cream being rubbed over his groin and behind. He finally attempted a meek protest and tried to push her hands aside; but she just pulled his away while continuing to coo at him. She sprinkled a liberal amount of powder over his genitals and the open diaper before rubbing it in. Satisfied she pulled the front of the diaper over his stomach and began to attach the tapes. Fred started wiggling like a fussy toddler and kicked his legs around crying louder as he heard the diaper crinkling beneath him. A gentle slap to his thigh stopped his movements. “Were almost done baby, I promise you will start to enjoy your diaper changes. You just have to learn to let go and not be ashamed. You’re my special little man and you can stay in diapers for as long as you live here if that’s what you want.” Mary said giving him an affectionate kiss on the forehead. Tears continued to roll down Fred’s cheeks as she attached the final tape of his diaper, sealing him inside his padded prison. He saw movement and looked over her shoulder straight into Mary’s eyes as she stood there in the open doorway, silently taking a video with her phone. Undoubtedly she had been there the whole time and caught everything on film. It looked like she got her video after all, maybe if he played along and used his diapers like a good boy she wouldn’t show anyone. It was the best outcome he could hope for now, he thought to himself as Mary snuck away. After adjusting his diaper one last time his mother stood him up. She gave him a gentle pat on his crinkly bottom before taking his hand and leading him away to re-join the family, wearing nothing else but his soft cosy diaper.
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Hey everyone! I would like to say this is my first time trying to write, but that's not true. I have started a couple stories that ended up fizzling out just after starting them. This time, I'm taking on a smaller scope for my story, so hopefully I can actually see this one through. My plan is for the entirety of this story to only be 3 or 4 chapters, and I basically have the general outline for how everything will go, so this shouldn't be too difficult to complete. Anyway, this story has most of it's plot beats based on a real life occurrence with my partner. Obviously both characters are above the age of 18. Please share any comments/critique you have and thanks for reading! Date Night to Diapers “Why did I have to show-off and get the spiciest curry?” Dylan wondered to himself as he squirmed in the passenger seat of his boyfriend’s sedan. The Indian restaurant they had just dined at was famous for serving a particular lamb dish that was tear-inducingly spicy. Wanting to show off to Curtis, his boyfriend, Dylan ordered this specialty dish without a second thought. He generally enjoyed spicy food, and the meal was definitely delicious, but the spiciness was unlike anything Dylan had ever experienced. Through the half-hour it took them to eat their meal, Dylan must have drunk about a half-gallon of water. Add on to it the almost full pint of beer that he chugged at the end of the meal (not going to let $5 go to waste), and Dylan was currently in dire straits. “What’s up kiddo?” Curtis asks from beside Dylan as the car pulls off the highway. Kiddo. Dylan never knew how to feel about his boyfriend’s choice in nickname. It is true that Dylan, standing at 5’7”, was dwarfed by his boyfriend, a giant at 6’4”. And sure, they had done some ageplay stuff over the past few months, but the term made sense during the roleplay. Curtis used the term to refer to Dylan all the time though, and Dylan wasn’t a kid in his day-to-day life. He was an adult. Dylan had never even heard of ageplay or ABDL before he met Curtis. It was adorable the first time Curtis brought up his interest in the fetish a couple of months prior. He was so nervous and blushing so hard that it was one of the only times Dylan ever felt like the more manly person in the relationship. Dylan agreed to try it out after this initial conversation. He could tell that it was very important to Curtis, and also didn’t see it as being too gross or out there. Thus, over the past few months, Dylan had found himself wearing GoodNites a half dozen times, and even a full-blown ABDL diaper twice per his boyfriend’s request. Most of the time, Dylan simply wore the garment as an element of their foreplay. The last couple times, though, Curtis had convinced Dylan to wet his padded underwear. As he had come out to find he didn’t mind wearing them, Dylan though that wetting them might turn out similarly. Dylan kind of hated to admit it, but he definitely didn’t mind wetting them either. He thought that having his own excrement in contact with his body would be disgusting, but the protective underwear always did a good job of absorbing his urine, leaving a warm, damp, and squishy cocoon around his groin. Now shifting in his seat, foot tapping so fast that it would put Neil Peart to shame, Dylan blushed as he recalled these most previous roleplaying sessions. During those times, he had actually found it surprisingly difficult to wet his diapers, even when he had to go. At this point, Dylan was pretty sure that any slip in his concentration would result in a genuine accident, not one forged in roleplay. “Nothing,” Dylan blurted out meekly. He tried to hold himself still, so that Curt wouldn’t think something was up. He was fairly successful, though his foot kept tip-tapping away. The restaurant was all of 30 minutes from the couple’s house – 25 minutes on the highway, 5 minutes the rest of the way home. Dylan knew this, and as they had just turned off the highway, he knew that he had to make it just 5 minutes until they were home. Just 5 more minutes. 5 more minutes of sitting with a bursting bladder. A bladder that seemed to be continuously filling and putting more and more pressure on his muscles. A bladder that seemed to have a pain growing deep inside it. A bladder that – “Can you drive a bit faster?” Curtis glanced sideways at Dylan, giving him a look of suspicion before returning his gaze to the road and pressing his foot slightly harder into the accelerator. “Sure thing, kiddo.” This time the childish term of endearment didn’t even register with Dylan. The entirety of the outside world might as well not have mattered to Dylan at this point. His entire life at this moment was wholly dedicated to his internal struggle of not having a genuine accident. Dylan didn’t even realize it, but his hands had made their way down to his groin and were pushing down – anything to help in this desperate time. Eyes intensely shut, Dylan put all his effort into clamping down on his bladder. At this point, one wrong move would spell disaster. As his concentration slipped to being 100% on keeping his pants dry, Dylan once again began dancing around in his seat like a raver on ecstasy. This made it explicitly obvious to Curtis what Dylan was going through, if it wasn’t already clear before. Curtis kept throwing quick glances at Dylan. He couldn’t believe this was happening. Was his boyfriend really going to have a genuine accident, something that only happened in his dreams? Maybe not. They were now less than a mile from their home - and salvation for Dylan. Curtis saw the set of train tracks by their home coming up, and like the 100 other times he drove down this road, he put his foot lightly on the breaks to slow down. “No! Don’t slow down!” Dylan practically shouted as his head flipped up and eyes shot open. Partly listening to Dylan’s instruction, but mostly startled by the sudden outburst, Curtis lifted his foot off the brake. The small sedan hurtled towards, and soon over, the set of tracks. Dylan’s outburst had been short sighted. Going over the tracks at such a high speed caused the car to nearly lift off the ground, before it came crashing back down, giving a huge jostle to the inhabitants. That was it for Dylan. The enormous bump had caused his intense concentration to falter. As the stranglehold on his bladder gave way, Dylan’s mouth fell agape and he sharply inhaled. Almost instantly a huge surge of urine shot out of him, splattering against the front of his boxers, followed by a continuous torrent. Unlike the pretend times when he had wet a diaper, his undies stood no chance to stop the flood. Dylan could feel the cotton of his briefs instantly become warm and saturated, with the wetness quickly spreading elsewhere throughout his groin. Not a half-second later, Dylan could feel his accident permeating through his khakis and getting his hands, still pressed firmly into his groin, wet. Dylan couldn’t really process what was happening. The immense relief combined with the intense humiliation of having an accident while not even a foot from his lover brought out emotions Dylan had never experienced. Dylan’s head panned down as he removed his hands from his crotch, now being able to view the ever-growing expanse of his accident with no ability to stop it. While some of his pee managed to soak the front of his pants, most of Dylan’s urine began trickling between his legs. Like a river feeding into a lake, the stream of urine soon soaked through the bottom of Dylan’s khakis and formed a warm pool in the leather seat. At long last, Dylan could feel the stream slow to a dribble and eventually stop. Dylan slowly raised his hands to cover his face, the pleasure from finally releasing his aching bladder being the only thing keeping him from full-on crying. The last two-hundred feet of the drive were emotional mayhem for Dylan as he was flooded with feelings of pleasure, guilt, relief, humiliation, and – most confusing to Dylan – arousal as he could feel his penis growing slightly hard within his urine-soaked pants. The car finally came to a complete stop within the couple’s garage. The sound of the engine stopping snapped Dylan out of his trance and he opened his eyes. “Oh, honey…”, Dylan heard Curtis finally remark on his accident. Of course, Curtis knew of his boyfriend’s accident as it was occurring, but didn’t want to make a comment until he was sure Dylan had completely finished. Whipping his misty, tear-filled eyes towards his boyfriend, Dylan exclaimed “I’m so sorry! I tried to hold it!”, not even realizing how childish he sounded with his outburst. “Let me close the garage door. That way, the neighbors can’t see and this can be just our little secret. You wait right there. I’ll come around and get you. Alright, Kiddo?” Curtis reassured Dylan as he pressed the garage door button once more. Dylan nods slowly at Curtis before returning his gaze downward. The sound of the garage door closing did a good job at masking Dylan’s quiet sobs while Curtis quickly stepped around to the passenger side door. At the sound of his door opening, Dylan tearfully looked up at Curtis. He unconsciously lifted his arms up towards his boyfriend, pleading to be helped. “Look at you…Let’s go get you cleaned up.” Curtis grabs the outstretched arms and helps Dylan up. As they march into the house, Dylan’s mind is once again elsewhere. Kiddo. For some reason, being called that by Curtis in this moment was reassuring, comforting, loving, not demeaning like it usually felt. He had roleplayed as a child for Curtis before, but now he was unintentionally living it out. As he walked, Dylan could feel the excess pee from the childish misdeed slowly trickle down his pantlegs, with some droplets even falling off, leaven a trail of urine from the car to the house. The tears in Dylan’s eyes made it impossible for him to see, and he relied entirely on Curtis as the two walked through the threshold into the house.
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One I swear if he’s out at the gym again for one of his ‘impromptu workout sessions’ I’ll bite his tail off. These musings came from the mind of a black and golden tan German Shepherd fur as he shivered, cold despite his thick fur and winter jacket at the doorstep of his friend’s house. The two had only been friends for a few months, but a lot had transpired between them during that time. Being a police officer, Rick was expected to keep his body in a state of fit physique and agility to operate at peak performance. Thus, he had found himself acquiring a gym membership after a few months at his new job when he had noticed a suspicious increase in mass around his midsection. Not wanting his fate to end like any other stereotypical donut munching cop, he had started to frequent his local gym several times a week, usually after his shift ended. At that establishment he found himself seeing a certain, rather athletic looking arcanine, who always seemed to be in the most chipper, friendly of moods whenever he saw him. After a few days of a few moments of eye contact and nervous smiling, he had come over to him and introduced himself as, ”Anthony, but you can call me Tony!” His confidence and self-assured grin had given him a friendly glow that Richard found he liked very much, and he extended his paw to shake and replied with his name. The following weeks turned into a blur as the two canines hit it off better than either of them had expected. Beyond exchanging their own little fitness tips and tricks their sense of humor was shared as well, and they found great excitement and amusement in exchanging their own ideas and perspectives on the world, which the two found that although they differed on many subjects they both found hearing what the other had to say about a particular argument quite interesting and engaging. They had gone out a few times too, to a few lesser-known bars that the arcanine had said he preferred to go too since he usually wasn’t recognized there. At this strange comment, Richard had raised his eyebrows, thinking that his friend was making a joke. Tony had smiled a little, the first time in fact that Richard had ever seen him look sheepish, as he explained that he was a locally well-known baseball player, and had found himself getting bothered quite a bit at some of the other establishments he had frequented previously. Richard had done a google search, at Tony’s suggestion more to humor him than anything, but found to his surprise a Wikipedia page confirming his newly made friend’s claims at athletic success. Tony had then told him something that warmed Rich’s heart. He had first begun to talk to the shepherd because he felt was searching for a friend who wouldn’t want to be close to him just for his fame, but someone who liked him as a person. This warmed the cop’s heart, and he had wrapped his arm around the hulky arcanine’s shoulder and smiled at him conspiratorially, saying that he was more than happy to be such a person for him. Naturally, after such a warm entrance into friendship, they had gotten plastered that night and ended up somehow both falling on top of each other back at Tony’s residence. Things had progressed down a path that the two had not fully acknowledged, even to themselves, but yet both somehow knew that would traverse if things continued. Tony had leaned forward into a passionate kiss, pushing himself against the shepherd in an act of shameless passion to which the drunken shepherd could only respond in kind. Their passions lead to the stripping of clothes and before Richard knew it the arcanine had begun to take control of him and his body in the most loving fashion he had experienced to date. Being straddled by the muscled beast he had whined and howled in pain and ecstasy, the arcanine leaning down to his ears and whispered sweet nothings into it, even going as far as gently biting the nape of his neck and embracing him around the chest as he thrust himself into him. The lovemaking had lasted a decent while, Richard remembered how he had marveled as just how well Tony had paced himself, most likely due to his athletic training and discipline. By the time Tony finished, at last, the shepherd found himself able to do little but pant and gasp for air in an orgasmic trance, having climaxed himself several minutes ago while Tony had still been going strong. The arcanine had grasped him under the chin and brought him up to his face. They kissed more, the arcanine rubbing his back and humming soothingly to the receptive canine, thanking him for a wonderful time. Richard could only smile goofily back, completely and utterly entranced by the wonderful being before him who he had so perfectly made love to. Richard stamped his feet, trying to keep warm even as his cheeks flushed with red standing in the cold at Tony’s doorstep, remembering how they had then fallen asleep spooning, Tony being the big spoon naturally, and how the shepherd had woken up to Tony cooking him breakfast, wrapped up in a snuggly blanket on his couch. They had spent the morning chatting about the previous night, now almost completely unabashedly speaking about their own preferences and even delving into fetishes. They had been surprised just how well they had meshed together in lovemaking last night, Tony causing Richard to blush when he told him how he wasn’t surprised at all how to find that the shepherd was so subordinate. “I mean come on, anybody looking at you even from a mile away could see that you totally scream bottom!” Richard had almost coughed his coffee out of his maw at this comment, causing Tony to only laugh louder between fork-fulls of syrupy pancake. The canine had blushed in response to the arcanine but smiled good-naturedly. Although normally his tough, police officer persona was the one he operated on most of the time, he found that he felt comfortable letting his guard down around the arcanine, even to the point of expressing his submissiveness to him. After his normally uncharacteristic blush, the arcanine had gently inquired about the shepherd’s preferences, whether he had considered himself a sub for long. The two spent the rest of the morning discussing their own sexual experiences, preferences, and even fantasies. Throughout their dialogue the arcanine seemed to work magic onto Richard, gently but firmly inquiring as to what he would enjoy and wouldn’t, as well as what thinks he would enjoy not enjoying. The shepherd’s heart rate rose up multiple times during their exchanges, excitement filling his body that not even his job offered him during moments of pursuing justice and chasing after criminals. “Wait here, Richie, I think I have something that you might enjoy.” The arcanine winked before rising to his full height and softly strolling out of the room, a devilish expression on his muzzle. Richard could only lean forward off of the couch and look after him, wondering what his attractive friend was wanting to retrieve. “Close your eyes, Richard.” The canine obeyed and heard Tony shuffle towards him before stopping in front of him. “You can open them now.” Richard opened his eyes and gazed up at Tony before looking down to see that the arcanine was holding something in front of the shepherd’s nose. Richard took a sharp breath and quickly realized what the object that lay in the arcanine’s outstretched paw was. A small, white chastity cage was being presented to him, complete with a steel, heart-shaped lock adorning the bottom. The German Shepherd’s heart pounded in his chest, and he looked up wide-eyed into Tony’s own well-knowing eyes, understanding what he was being offered. “What do you think buckeroo, wanna have some fun? I think I could go for domming a cutie like you. After all, I think after last night you’ve proven that you might be needing this. You made a mess all over my couch after all!” Richard’s cheeks reddened at the playful admonishment, but his eyes looked back down onto the cage in front of him. He opened his lips as if to speak, but found it difficult to articulate what he felt. Picking up on his apparate speechlessness, Tony squatted in front of him and looked up into the blushing shepherd’s eyes, his voice softening now but retaining the same firm assuredness that proliferated his entire being. “How about I help you put it on, would that help, pup?” The shepherd could only nod shakily in response, his breaths still coming in heavy and deep as his entire being seemed to grow warm and vibrate in excision and stimulation. The arcanine gently pushed on the shepherd’s shoulders and repositioned him onto his back. Scooching over onto the couch he unbuckled the shepherd’s jeans and slid them down, following with his underwear. Richard’s member had begun to grow slowly after he had been approached by the arcanine’s offer but had not yet reached full erection. Tsk-tsking at the apparent excitement the canine was displaying, Tony worked efficiently and quickly at sliding the tube over the shepherd's not yet fully excited head and looping the support ring underneath his testicles. Richard felt a firm pressure on his jewels, which increased to a more distinct pressing feeling as he heard a soft click, and then a louder one as the cage was locked firmly into place. His member now strained against his confines, but to no relief as the plastic prison kept his erotic excitement firmly and securely in check. Tony grinned, and almost cooed as he said. “Looks like our little friend here is having a hard time containing himself! It’s a good thing I was around to make sure that he doesn’t get himself into trouble now, no?” Tony’s words washed over him like a stimulating wave of air, causing a shiver to run through him as both tone and context of what the arcanine said turned him on immensely. The amateur baseball player had a charm and confidence that the shepherd could find almost irresistible. He couldn’t help but blushing slightly, as he gazed into the arcanine’s eyes, feelings of attraction and yearning coursing through his veins as he strained against the cage around his member. Tony offered a paw to him and helped Richard up to his feet before helping him redress, surprising him by delivering an impassioned and deliberate kiss on the shepherd’s cheek, causing him to his great embarrassment to stammer a little bit in response. Tony’s eyes glistened as he let out a loud laugh, grinning broadly and looking directly into Richard’s eyes and winking confidently. “Oh Rick, this is going to be more fun than I could have possibly imagined, I figured you were a total sub but to this extent? I think this is going to be a luxurious time.”
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Hey! So I figured out literally yesterday that you can have multiple non-ejaculatory orgasms as a male. I figured this out by accident by testing a theory I had which was basically force my body to do something else right as I'm about to orgasm to try and get my brain occupied with something and it worked. I told my wife about this amazed and she simply replied "Oh, I knew that." like it was nothing, meanwhile I'm sitting there mind completely blown! lol I looked it up and turns out I'm just late to the Non-Ejaculatory Multiple Orgasm (NEMO) party. Anyway thought it was an interesting topic so I wanted to ask have you had any experience with multiple orgasms as a male? Did you train yourself? was it accidental? are you one of the gifted who just was born with it? Anyway I thought it was an interesting topic!
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Weeks of quarantine have been rough, I'd been spending much of my time in the living room writing silly things or reading the news. During this time, I started to wear diapers nearly all the time, and especially to bed so I wouldn't have to get up in the night to pee. I was considering going diaper-free for a few days, but then I was found out by my roommate, Sarah. I was laying back in my chair with my feet resting comfortably on the footrest with my laptop on top of my legs, typing away. As I did I must have been absentmindedly dribbling into my diaper, like I'd been doing for days. Then, Sarah entered the room. I thought nothing of it. "Your pants are wet--" I jumped up and closed the laptop in one swift motion. "I--uh--" "What happened?" She asked, looking confused, and slightly concerned. "It's nothing, I just spilled--" "What? Spilled what?" She asked, seemingly taken aback by my slightly panicky state. "Some tea, it's that Echinacea blend--" "Only spilled it on you butt?" She wasn't buying it. "Uh, yeah." "You didn't wet your pants, did you?" "Like pee myself? No--" I said in a wavering tone. "Yeah you peed your pants." She stated bluntly. "You don't have to lie, it's okay, I'm not judging you." I sighed. "I did--" "Why didn't you get up and go to the bathroom? Didn't you notice? Why didn't you change out of--" "I dunno, I just--I, uh--was in the middle of something." "What?" She looked amused, but there was also something sympathetic and pitying in her gaze. "You--" "Okay I'm wearing a diaper and it leaked." I blurted out. She seemed startled. "Wh--no. You're wearing a diaper? Why?" "I like to wear them sometimes, it's something no one was supposed to know about--I want to just keep this to myself, and have us both forget this ever happened, okay?" I said, beginning to feel a little bit defensive. "Awh, that's cute," She cooed. "You need a diapy change? That's it?" "I need to change, yeah," I said. I felt the wetness beneath me and felt dread. I had no idea what was going to happen next. I was totally found out. "Need help?" She asked quietly. "If you don't mind, I guess--sure." She took my hand and looked up at me. "Where do you keep your diapers," she whispered. "Top shelf of the drawer." Sarah and I walked to my room. She opened the drawer slowly and quietly, to many rows of disposables stacked neatly. My regular underwear was underneath somewhere, I hadn't seen them much for a while. "Here we go, change time," She unfolded my diaper as I sat down on my bed. I was unsure if wanted here to see me without pants on in a leaky diaper. I felt exposed. I was quickly soothed though as she began to slide my shorts off to get at the soggy packaging I was in underneath. She loosened the tabs on my brief and rubbed a little powder into my groin. She must have found it in the drawer. I looked up at the ceiling and enjoyed the comfort of being changed by someone else for once, someone I happened to be growing slowly closer to. "Looks like you could use some more diapers soon, I'll buy them if you'll keep wearing them," She said. I sat up and felt the front of my clean diaper. It was bulky and fastened on snugly, seemingly better than what my own hands could do. "You would? Okay, sure, I'd love that." I smiled up at her warmly, and allowed myself to dribble out a little pressure that was building inside me. "I'll put these shorts in the wash, let's get you something clean." I stared for a moment at the wet spot on my fresh diaper, and soon Sarah was helping me into a clean pair of shorts. "That was really nice, thank you--" I gushed. "I didn't think this would happen, I thought I was doomed, my secret was out--" She held her finger up to her lips. "It's our secret now--I'll keep changing you, I like it. I need something to do, been stuck in the house for a while now. Plus, you're so cute in them!" We smiled and she took my hand and led me back to the living room. After she wiped the wetness of of my chair, she helped me sit down and gave me a blanket. It was beginning to snow outside, which is odd for April. "I'll check your diaper in a few hours, okay? Don't take it off!" "Alright," I replied. She winked and left the room. *** A few hours of me gently losing my bladder to Sarah's expertly fastened diaper came and went. I was beginning to grow so used to them that they felt like an extension of my own body. The toilet was something I only used once every few days now, it felt like I was in diapers for real rather than once in a while. I felt a large spurt of pee leave me as I sat up. Sarah was coming down the hall, I could hear her. "It's getting late, you feeling sleepy?" She asked, sitting down on the sofa beside me. I yawned, feeling another trickle of wetness escape me. "Yeah." "Let's get you ready for bed," She said playfully, leaning in closer. "You're gonna need another diaper," she whispered, taking my hand. I let her lead me into my bedroom again. I laid down obediently on my bed and watched as she got my next diaper open. She stretched it out a bit to make the padding inside less stiff. I let her take off my old diaper which was surprisingly soaked and yellow. I wasn't really sure how wet I was until I saw her rolling up my old brief. I caught a whiff of urine and the smell of her perfume as she cocooned my groin in its fresh, padded potty. I was all ready for nighttime. "There's your diaper," She winked. "Thanks so much, I don't know what to say," I whispered, feeling like I'd been hit by cupid's arrow. I admired her handiwork again, she was really good at changing diapers, better than I was. There was an almost velvety softness inside of my brief, from all of the pleasant smelling baby powder she rubbed in. "I'll be around to change you in the morning, all you gotta do is find me and tug on my shirt. I'll know," She cooed. I laid my head down on my pillow, and she pulled the blankets around me and tucked me in. I was snug in bed and warm, wearing only my diaper and an old t-shirt. I was exhausted and in heaven at the same time. "Nighty night," She blew me a kiss and got ready to close the door. "Night night," I said sleepily, yawning. She turned off my light and closed the door. I released a little of the pressure in my lower belly and was greeted by warmness. I fell asleep not long after in Sarah's expertly taped and slightly soggy night time diaper.
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Hi All I am thinking outside the box what kind of Catheter can stay in the bladder so urine can just drain into adult diapers as been in them since 2009 when I had an Spinal Injury L3L4L5S1 to the point of Intermitted urine Incontinence, intermitted retention, bowel constipation, as well as apparently purposely dehydrate myself due to my issues to the point my psychologist wants me to do exposure therapy to get "used to" wetting myself so I desensitize so its not traumatic and accept my incontinence as the intermitted no warning episodes is messing up my autism and mental health to the point I occasionally self harm because of it even though been 11 years. Catheter and bag system wont work for me as I wouldn't be able to insert it myself as well as a high fall risk and the tubing would move as well as tangle according to health professionals due to my many disabilities incl shaky hands will def ask the next urologist if the ever open and see people again in Australia public health
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"Oh, you're always like this now," she mused. "Looks like my big boy's having another one of his pampers problems..." she gave me a pouty sad face before giggling. "Can't you do anything to keep dry?" I shook my head absentmindedly. "Well it's too bad, you used to be so grown up--but I know just what to do." she said, placing her hands on my hips. She looked me in the eyes, and then pulled me into a hug. Smelling her coconut, sea, and musk perfume filled me with emotion as I began to hold her tightly. I felt a dribble of pee begin in my diaper and breathed in her smell more fully, trying to forget my underwear shame. It wasn't enough though, and I felt myself beginning to tear up. "Awh, is someone crying? You know I love you no matter what, it's okay--" she whispered from above me. With her being a tall woman, I couldn't help but feel more at a loss in her presence. I was less like her boyfriend every day. She even called my underwear pampers, like I was some kind of baby! My thought train was interrupted by another spurt of wetness trickling down for a long moment before being absorbed somewhere below. "Shh, I know you're mature," she cooed. "It's just that we need a little help down there, help that diapees give you!" She returned her hands to my hips again and began to unfasten me. In the chilliness of having my diaper pulled away, I noticed what little arousal I had from holding onto her was beginning to shrink into nothing. "Looks like the diaper's doing its job, you're getting smaller down there--and wetter." She kissed me. "Isn't it better this way?" I hesitated. "I guess. It is nice having you care for me." "That's the spirit, you're doing great so far." She revealed a clean diaper for me from inside her purse and got busy slowly unfolding it, getting it ready for my behind. Being about eye level with her upper chest, I was drawn to look at her breasts and lower belly for a moment. Instinctively, I reached over and held just above her hips, petting her gently with my thumbs. I felt very aroused by her, but I was unable to show it. These diapers were doing something funny to me. "Why would they make diapers that get rid of--" "It makes you less likely to leak, dear." She began to position the diaper around me, and I was relieved that she did--she didn't have to see the small accident that was trickling out as she fastened my tabs snugly. "They don't do anything else funny like that, do they?" "They do make you calmer. It's to make you easier to care for, of course." She poked me on the nose and pulled me in for a hug. "Want me to get you something for lunch at the food court?" "Please." I blurted out, along with another spurt into my diaper. I was about to unlock the bathroom door when she grabbed my hands. "Let's get your shorts back on first," she said. I watched as she did up the button, hiding most of my diaper below the waistband, but not all of it. She positioned my shirt over top to cover the rest. "There, now we're all set."
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@gta85 Here we go. I’ll take Sarah and Tommy, you take John and Katie? John and Sarah Baker had found out they couldn’t have children, so they made the decision to adopt from their local orphanage. They’d intended to adopt an older child and a baby, but 2 1/2 year old Tommy and 3 year old Katie had stolen their hearts on sight. While John took care of some last-minute details, Sarah was taken to Katie and Tommy, who were ready to go. Katie had just turned three, and she was mostly potty-trained, aside from occasional daytime accidents and wetting her bed a couple of nights a week. The orphanage took kids out of diapers except at night when kids turned two and just frequently took them to the toilet, but Tommy wasn’t all that potty-trained yet. ”Hi, you guys!” Sarah greeted them brightly. She sat in a chair and held her arms out, inviting them to come sit with her. Tommy slipped his thumb into his mouth and looked down at the floor, so Sarah pulled him into her lap and kissed the side of his head.
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Hi all. I thought I'd tell you my hospital diapering story. I write to you right now while wearing a large and somewhat soggy diaper with a medical look to it, while wrapped up snugly in my warm blankets. These diapers are very spacious and thick, they have the odd effect of making me forget where my pee-pee is positioned at all--seems it could be anywhere in the mass of almost nerve-numbing padding. I think I wet while I was laying down earlier, though I'm not totally sure. Probably peed a couple of times. Feels like I won't need a change for a while though. When I poke at these undies very gently with one finger only, it seems like wave of pressure is coming from all directions. I couldn't tell you where my finger was, or where my genitals were. They're in there somewhere, and that's probably for the better considering the accidents. Let me back up a bit and tell you how I got here, and how I ended up in diapers pretty much against my will. I had a mental health episode back in early February that landed me in an institution. I would rather not go into the specifics, suffice to say I was going to be holed up for a while. I remember that the food was hard to get used to at first, but, you get used to it. As a safety precaution, I was only allowed to wear the outfit that was approved there, a plain looking hospital gown and some ruffly thin trousers. They'd begun to force an unknown cocktail of medications on me which were having some pretty strong effects. I could tell by how sedated I was that there was some kind of anti-psychotic in the chemical soup. Three times a day with meals I took pills of many different colours, none of which I knew the potential side effects of. I guess I had to simply place my trust in an authority whose methods were unknown to me. It was around my fifth day there when I noticed pee leaking down my leg under the trousers I had on. It had already came out, I had no recollection of peeing. I was a bit dazed, and couldn't make out what that strange cold feeling was for a while. I noticed when I sat down in a chair in the common room that my crotch had a few thin lines of wetness emanating downward from it. It was only then that it dawned on me, I'd wet myself. No idea when, but I was wet now. I stood up and shuffled around, looking for my nurse. Her name's Lindy, she's a pretty woman a few years older than me. If I had to describe her body type, she's fit but a little thick, with something extra on the caboose. You'd almost think she was wearing diapers too, if it wasn't for her panty lines. I spotted her as she walked briskly past me on her way to the east wing. I had to catch up with her, but she was too quick. I followed along behind, trying hard to stay focused. It seemed like I was nearly ready to forget the whole matter and lay down on the cool tile floor for a nap. "Lindy?" I called. "Lindy?" She stopped and turned. "Yes?" "I had an accident I think," I said calmly, much more calmly than I would have if I wasn't totally drugged. "I see, I see," She said in a laid back and cool way. "Let's go, follow me." I was a little bit disoriented as she led me by the hand to the room I was staying in. I had little sense that we were going there until we were actually in the room. In a lot of ways it was more like a cell than a room, with white walls and an angular metal bunk bed being its most defining features. Up above my bed there was a small sliver of window, with bright sunlight trying to poke as much of itself in as possible. "Can you sit on the floor for me, hon?" She helped me to sit on the floor. The chillness of it made me shudder. Suddenly, I was feeling really cold. I started to shiver. "I'm c-cold," I stammered. "It might be a side effect of one of your meds. I'll be right back, you just stay on the floor, okay?" "Why the floor?" I asked hazily. "Well," She began, as if trying to find the nicest words possible give the awkward circumstances, "I'm afraid you'll pee on the bed--be right back, just stay there..." She trailed off as she briskly exited the room, closing the door behind her. I distinctly remember hearing the door's lock reverb through the room as it was turned, and suddenly I felt a burst of warmth on my crotch as I erupted into feeble shivers. I don't know how long I sat there, but when Lindy returned she had a really thick looking blanket which immediately put my heart at rest in a child-like sort of way when I saw it. She was also holding under her arm what looked like a package of diapers. I watched as she laid the blanket out on the bed and placed the diapers on my little bedside table by the ruled journal they gave us. I took this fact without concern, not really making the connection of assuming that those diapers were going to be there for me. Soon Lindy had placed a mat on the floor beside my bed and motioned for me to come over. "Come on, come on sweetie. This won't be so bad." I went to her cooing call, transfixed by her disarming gaze. It almost looked sensual at the time, but I doubt she wanted anything to do with my pants-wetting butt beyond merely changing it. Before I really knew what hit me, I was fastened into a gigantic crinkly diaper. I tried to sit up at first but fell back. Luckily, Lindy was there to catch me and help me sit up against my bed. "So, we have you in a brief," she said, looking at me with a sympathetic gaze that suggested a little pity as well. "I need you to not try to take this off, okay? I really, really need you to cooperate with me." "I don't wanna wear a diaper--" "I know, I know you don't. But I really can't trust you after that big accident you just had," she cooed. "No, no!" I said, raising my voice slightly as the gravity of the situation began to weigh on me. "Please, they're not so bad to wear... Will you do it for me?" She winked at me and smiled contagiously. I couldn't help but capture a little of her smile on my own lips. "Well, fine," I said after a pause. "But I don't need diapers." "Yes you do, remember that accident you had? I can't have you trailing pee. That's not nice feeling, is it?" She shook her head for emphasis. "Oh, yeah," I replied after a pause. I shivered some more and Lindy helped me into my bed and under the covers. She tucked me in like as if she was my mommy. It felt that way at the time. "Now you're all snuggly and warm, and protected. I will bring you your dinner and your medication soon, okay?" "Thanks mommy," I said before I could stop myself. I laughed at the silliness of what I'd just said and could have swore I felt something warm swelling up on my crotch. "Sorry mo--I uh--sorry Lindy." She looked at me for a long time after I said that. Not with an unhappy gaze though. I could see some pity in her eyes for her poor diapered patient, but there was something motherly mingled in there as well. When she sat down on my bed and began to stroke my hair, the motherliness was made much more manifest. There was no doubt that she cared about me in that most vulnerable moment. I think as she stroked my hair, I continued to dribble into my diaper. I shivered here and there, which only made the fight to keep my pee inside more difficult. I have no idea how much I was peeing at the time, but after she left the room I took a peek under the covers and saw that it looked puffy and yellow, though I felt totally dry. It was weird at first, I wasn't used to the oddly comforting and convenient mechanics of my new diapered life. Here I was peeing myself in bed and it didn't even feel wet. I looked at the plastic tabs fastened firmly on the front panel of my underwear and tried to pull one of them off out of curiosity and absentmindedness. It wouldn't budge, so I gave up my effort soon after. I didn't know what to think about being diapered at the time. so I rolled over and tried to get some sleep. I passed out almost immediately. I woke up in a daze and tried to sit up, though I struggled to at first, feeling a little bit dizzy. I stared at the wall for a while as I came to. The room seemed darker somehow. I looked up at the little window and saw no light pushing through. It must have been the middle of the night. I went under the covers again and looked at my diaper with an absentminded, child like curiosity again. My diaper's different! It wasn't soggy yellow anymore. When did that happen? *** I'll cut to the chase and fast forward a little. As the weeks went on I came to really like Lindy's diaper changes. She was really gentle about it and rubbed lots of baby powder into me with intimate movements. Her changes were the highlight of my otherwise dreary days at the asylum. I liked to look at her thick thighs as she cleaned me. I wasn't sure if my bladder control was getting better or not, and I didn't really care or think about it. As the weeks went by I watched as package after package of disposables came and went, doing their time on my feeble and soggy bottom before being relegated to the diaper genie. By the time of writing this, it seems I've lost most of my bladder control. But I'm not really concerned, since I have Lindy around most days of the week to keep me changed and secure. Maybe it's not so bad here. I found a group to play with during common time. When we aren't playing video games together, we're playing with blocks. They don't seem to know that there's a diaper under my pants, but it seems like they're as hazy and inattentive as me. I swear I caught a glimpse of the waistband of a pull-up on one of the women in the group. Maybe most of the patients here were in some kind of diaper. Luckily for me Lindy always made sure I was changed into a clean brief before playtime so I wouldn't have to be interrupted. So that's my story. I hope you liked it. End note: this is a fictional account. Hope you enjoyed the ride.
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Chapter 1 Caleb strolled through the forest, pokeball in hand. Today was the day, the 15-year-old mentally told himself, the day he finally, finally caught a pokemon of his own. Every other kid from the town had found one and started their journey years ago, and Caleb hated feeling left behind. A rustling in the nearby bushes alerted him to the presence of a pokemon. Stepping back cautiously in case it was dangerous, he saw a hypno slowly emerge from the greenery; Caleb smiled. “Wow! Talk about luck!” He raised his arm to throw the pokeball... only for something to catch his eye and distract him. It sparkled in the sunlight, and slowly began to move back and forth... back and forth... back and forth... Caleb slowly realized that the sparkling item in question was the hypno's coin. A part of him warned him not to look, that he'd be at the pokemon's mercy... but the more he watched, the more he questioned that voice. It's so pretty... so shiny and sparkly... maybe... maybe I should be at her mercy... I want to be at her mercy... I want to watch the pretty shiny sparkly coin and be at her mercy... Caleb didn't even register that he somehow knew the hypno was female. A smile slowly formed on his face as he sighed happily, relaxing every muscle in his body, his thoughts forming into a mantra repeated in time to the swinging coin. Back... and forth. O...bey. Back... and forth. O...bey. Back... and forth. O...bey. Back... and forth. O... bey. “Hyp... no... hyp... no... hyp... no... hyp... no...” Caleb's smile widened, too enraptured to realize that he, not the pokemon, was saying “hypno”. The mantra changed slightly as the hypno responded in a calm, soothing voice. “Hypno, no... hypno hyp hyp no, hypno hypno. Hyp hypno hypno!” To Caleb, the meaning was clear. <“Good job, little one... you're doing soooo good, watching my pretty coin. What a good boy you are!”> “Hyp... no... hyp... no... hyp... no... hyp... no...” Back... and forth... little... one... back... and forth... so... good... back... and forth... pretty... coin... back... and forth... good... boy... <“That's right, little one. Be a happy boy. It's silly-dum-dum time for you. You want to be sooo stupid and dum-dum, just a dumb little boy...”> Caleb could feel his intelligence slipping away, making him dumber and dumber. He was going to be very stupid indeed... and he couldn't wait. No more thinking, no more smarts, just empty-headed bliss. He'd be as dumb as a toddler. Back... and forth... little... one... back... and forth... Dum... dum... Back... and forth... little... boy... <“Aww, my baby is getting soooo stupid! Just a stupid baby... a happy baby... time to wet yourself, happy baby... you'll be soooo happy when you go pee-pee for mommy...”> No, not dumb as a toddler, dumb as a baby. Even better! Back... and forth... stu... pid... back... and forth... ba... by... back... and forth... hap... py... back... and forth... pee... pee... Caleb's pants quickly became utterly soaked as a near flood of pee came out, the sound hissing loudly as he sighed in utter happiness. He was happy because he made pee-pee for his mommy like a good little baby. <“Aww, my widdle baby made his first wetsy! I'll stop the coin and snap my fingers soon... when I do, you'll get your big boy thoughts back, but you won't be able to refuse anything I say, no matter how much you want to... and whenever I say 'silly baby', you'll be sooo stupid again...”> Caleb nodded, his smile not wavering. SNAP! “Wh... what? What happened?... Wait... I'm wet?!” Caleb tried to cover himself up in embarrassment, but a voice interrupted him. “Now now, babies don't feel shame! Take your pee-pee-pants off and be nakey for mommy!” Caleb suddenly realized that the hypno was talking, and he understood it. “No way—what?” His shock at his new comprehension was quickly eclipsed by how fast he was removing his clothes, tossing them aside until he was completely nude. He tried to cover himself up, but his body refused to do so. His horror only increased when he saw the hypno put the coin away and hold up something else: a very thick diaper covered in pictures of baby pokemon smiling happily in one hand, a bottle of baby powder in the other. “Good baby! Now lie down for mommy and let me diaper you!” His body once again obeying against his wishes, Caleb laid down on his back, the soft grass tickling his naked flesh as the hypno approached and covered his groin and butt with lots and lots of powder before putting him in the diaper. Its thickness was so great that Caleb knew he wouldn't be able to stand up, let alone walk. And yet, it wasn't uncomfortable... in fact, it was very comfortable... he shook off those thoughts as best he could. “Stop, I'm not a baby!” “Yes you are! You're just mommy's little baby! Aww, you look soooo cute!” “No, I'm a—” “Baby.” “I'm—” “A baby, that's right! What a good baby, you know what you are!” “STOP! I'M NOT A BIG BOY, I'M A BABY!” Caleb's eyes went wide as he realized what he'd just shouted, almost reflexively. The hypno just smiled, and with a wave of her hand, he felt himself floating in midair, suspended by her psychic powers. “Good baby! Time to come home with mommy.” Wearing nothing but a diaper, Caleb could do nothing as he floated helplessly along behind the hypno; as they passed through the forest, he tried to think of an escape plan... “Silly baby! You're too stupid and little to plan anything! And you don't ever want to escape from mommy!” A flip switched in Caleb's mind at the trigger word and the goofy smile returned. Heehee! Why would I want to run away? I'm happy to be sooo dum-dum! I like being a stupid dum-dum widdle baby for mommy! His cheer was so great he giggled happily like a baby, kicking his feet in the air as he floated along. Soon, they arrived in a clearing with a shimmering wall of light; passing through it revealed a large building painted in bright, soft colors, with a sign reading “Poke-nursery” above the door. The hypno walked in, followed swiftly by Caleb, who was soon deposited in a playpen. SNAP! Coming out of the trance once again, Caleb looked around, startled by his new surroundings. Strangely enough, he vaguely remembered something about his trance, though it was fuzzy like a fading dream... “Welcome to your new home, my sweet little diaper baby boy!” He looked up at the hypno, who was smiling warmly down at him. Before he could speak, she waved her hands, and he found himself shrinking down, his diaper shrinking with him. Though his appearance and physical age remained the same, he was now the size of an actual baby. Caleb didn't have much time to panic about this, as a few more pokemon approached; one was a hypno—this one male—accompanied by a miltank and a jynx. The male hypno smiled at him as well and spoke, and once again Caleb found himself understanding every word. “Hello, baby! I'm your daddy!” the male hypno said; gesturing to the miltank and the jynx, he continued. “These are your other caretakers, and they'll help us take good care of you! Meet Auntie Milk and Auntie Song!” The latter two cooed at him, talking to him in baby-talk as one would do toward an actual baby. Caleb had never felt more humiliated in his life, and blushed considerably... “Ah ah ah,” Mommy—no, the female hypno chided; “babies don't blush because babies aren't ever embarrassed!” He felt his embarrassment fading away rapidly, and was left not knowing what to feel about his current situation. His confusion increased as the miltank approached an picked him up, holding him against her udders. The miltank smiled down at him and spoke in a cheerful, playful tone, the kind meant for the smallest of infants. “Time for milkies, widdle baby!” No. That was a step too far. He shut his mouth tight and turned his head away, only to be pressed tighter against the udders. “Let Auntie Milk feed you, baby.” As the order came in, he found his mouth opening wide to allow one of the miltank's nipples to enter, and against his will he began suckling. To his surprise, the milk tasted good. No, not good; it tasted absolutely wonderful, and soon he found himself hugging the pokemon's soft, warm midsection tightly and suckling hungrily, eager for more. When one nipple went dry, he felt almost disappointed... until the miltank guided his head toward another. This time, he didn't hesitate, and in fact shoved his mouth onto the nipple with an almost desperate need. This process repeated until he had drunk from all four udders. The miltank then handed him over to the jynx, who cradled him in her arms like a baby. Caleb quickly realized that the milk had a physical effect on him; no longer was he lean and fit. Instead, he was chubby, his baby fat having returned. He squirmed in the jynx's arms, until she suddenly began singing, rocking him slowly back and forth as she did so. “Time to wet, baby boy! Time to wetsy-wet! All your shame and all your worries, you will soon forget, when you wetsy-wetsy-wetsy-wetsy-wet!” The song was soothing; Caleb had never heard anything so beautiful in his life. He barely noticed as he helplessly soaked his diaper, a loud hissing noise accompanying the swelling of the diaper. The hypno's earlier suggestion held on, preventing him from feeling embarrassed at the wetting... or was it the song? Either way, he felt absolutely no shame or worry at it, even though he knew he ought to be frightened. “Good baby,” the male hypno cooed, “time for a changie, then it's beddie-bye-sleepy-time for our widdle baby!” The jynx carried him over to a changing table, and the male hypno began to remove his wet diaper and change him into an equally thick one before putting a baby blue footed sleeper on him and picking him up. Caleb could do nothing as he was carried to a crib and laid down gently. He didn't think he could sleep at all. This entire situation was too much for him to handle. Then the mobile was sent spinning, a soft lullaby tinkling from it; this wouldn't have worked on him if not for the fact that all four pokemon began singing to him, the jynx's power amplifying the psychic effect on him. Caleb yawned heavily, and found himself laying down on the soft, soft material as a baby blanket was draped over him, and before he knew it he drifted off into a peaceful slumber.
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Set in the diaper dimension universe. Let me know if you guys like it and want to see more. _______________________ Of all the assignments I had been given this one was surprising me as the worst so far. To date I've been involved in three war and one attempted coup in a jungle no one knows about. The superiors took note of my work and I advanced pretty fast. I also made some powerful friends that wanted to return some favors. When I was told I'd be given a nice cushy embassy guard duty I was pretty happy. No more bullet dodging in a hot sandy hell or fungus filled socks in the humid Congo. Hell I even thought I could find a nice girl and try settling down again with wife number four. Might work this time. But for all the advantages of being here and even being in full command it didn't make up for the one serious down side of the job. I checked my watch and saw that the downside would be here just about now. The asshole kept time like a Swiss masterwork. “Good morning! How are you today little boy? Is our little Ashley having a nice day?” I looked up from my watch and saw what I saw each morning. Two of my subordinates looking very uncomfortable and flanking a well dressed young man. The man's size made my men look s like they were 2 or 3 feet tall. He towered over them and myself. He was rail thin and reminded me of a telephone pole. But with his size he could probably easily crush any human in this town. He of course didn't though. It would be an interdimensional incident that no one really wanted to see happen. Plus he was a kind sort. That's probably what I hated the most about him. He always smiled and was polite. He was also insanely condescending and the treatment of me and my men drove me mad. “Good morning Ambassador Pool. As I have asked please address me as Commander Blair.” I said to him. I tried my best to make eye contact, but at the angle I was staring right into the sun trying to look up at him and had to squint. “And as I have answered we aren't on the battlefield little mister so no need for such formalities. Just call me Henry and I'll call you Ashley my little friend. Oh I brought some for you as well.” The tower in front of me cheerfully responded as the reached in a large bag and pulled out a normal sized cookie and handed it to me. Each morning the same two men escorted the Ambassador to a local shop that has agreed to make a few sweets in the size of the Amazons. The embassy has a full kitchen, but I think the Ambassador is trying to endear himself to the locals. The shop is making a small fortune supplying them. He also sometimes brings me and my men some. I noticed my two men were awkwardly holding a cookie each. I took mine from his giant hand and thanked him. If I didn't it would have been a long argument of me saying no and having to take it eventually anyway. What the Ambassador calls a “tantrum”. The large man waved and said his goodbyes to “ little Tommy" and “little Joey" and I saw Specialists Thomas Ford and Joseph Fields get more uncomfortable. He all released a sigh of relief seeing the Ambassador back on what is technically Amazon soil. We tossed the cookies in the bin and I sent the men back to the small shed that we stayed in outside the embassy. I went around the east side of the building and lit a cigarette. I had to make sure I was not in view of the embassy windows as I smoked. We all did. If we were seen smoking by the Ambassador he would give us an earful about it being bad for our small lungs. He actually threatened by punish a few of my men for it. We complained about that one, but nothing came of it. This was an Ambassador from a superior dimension and also he was related to the head of there ruling party. Nothing to do but grin and bear this assignment.
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Looking for a [long term] roleplay buddy; i do have some ideas but we could discuss it in pm, i guess. Roleplay will include; *Spanking *Omorashi ( maybe diapers? ) *Bladder control, I’m not into ageplay, and furry. Also; * I’m not looking for a whiny character. * Only 16+ Characters. * No one-liners. I want you to write a minimum of 5 lines. ( prefferable para / multi para. ) * No god-modding So, If you are interested, hit me up!
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I am a sissy baby who is having a birthday in mid August. My momma and i do not live together and she is unable to make it for my bday. Momma is looking for someone who will be willing to give me my birthday spanks. Looking forward to hearing back from someone close. Thank you