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Introducing Emma and Kelsey! I'm going to be posting stories about them on my Ream or SubStar! _______________________ CSI: Daycare: When Your Fiancé is Your Daycare Teacher Part 1: The Mystery Begins 25-year-old Emma stood by the edge of daycare the playroom, her cheeks glowing red as she fidgeted with her fingers. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, the faint crinkle of her diaper beneath her onesie betraying her every nervous movement. This was not going to be easy. Every part of her wanted to turn around and bolt for the nap mats, but she knew Kelsey, her daycare teacher and fiancé, would find her eventually. Better to get this over with. Taking a deep breath, she shuffled toward Kelsey, who was tidying up some art supplies. Kelsey looked up as Emma approached, her warm smile immediately making Emma feel safe and loved, even if she was about to make a complete fool of herself. “Hey, Bunny,” Kelsey said gently, using her pet name for Emma. “What’s up? You look like you’ve got something on your mind.” Emma avoided eye contact, twiddling her fingers as her blush deepened. “I, um, don’t want to point fingers,” she started, her voice barely above a whisper, “but someone wet this diaper, like, a lot.” Kelsey raised an eyebrow, her lips twitching as she tried to suppress a smile. “Oh? Someone wet the diaper you’re wearing right now?” she asked, tilting her head in playful curiosity. Emma nodded, her eyes glued to the floor. “Yep. It wasn’t me, though,” she added quickly. “I mean, I just go to daycare here. Not really fair to expect me to solve all the mysteries, you know?” Kelsey couldn’t hold back her laughter any longer. She chuckled softly and crouched down to Emma’s eye level, her hands resting on her knees. “Well, that does sound like a mystery. Who do you think it could have been?” Emma shrugged, finally daring to look up at Kelsey. “I dunno. Probably some toddler, maybe Milo. He’s always up to something.” “Milo, huh?” Kelsey said, stroking her chin thoughtfully. “But how would Milo get into your diaper, Bunny? That seems like a tricky feat.” Emma crossed her arms, pouting slightly. “I don’t know, Kels. I’m just saying someone did it, and it wasn’t me.” Kelsey stood up, still grinning. “Well, I suppose we’ll have to get to the bottom of this. But first, let’s get you to the changing table, okay?” Emma hesitated, her blush intensifying. “Um… also,” she added, her voice dropping to an almost inaudible whisper, “still not pointing fingers or anything, but someone pooped this pamper too. Like, a lot.” Kelsey put a hand over her mouth, stifling a laugh. “Oh no,” she said, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “That’s a serious crime. A wet and poopy diaper? This is getting out of hand.” Emma nodded solemnly, clearly trying to keep her composure. “Yep. Big mess. But again, not my fault.” “Well, Bunny,” Kelsey said, taking Emma’s hand and leading her toward the changing area, “we’re going to have to get to the bottom of your poopy diaper bottom. But here’s the problem: if I change you now, we’ll destroy all the evidence. How am I supposed to solve the case if I don’t have any clues?” Emma groaned, realizing she had inadvertently turned her cute diaper change joke into an elaborate detective game. She’d hoped Kelsey would just laugh it off and get the change over with, but now it was clear she’d underestimated her fiancée’s love of theatrics. As they reached the changing table, Kelsey turned to Emma with a determined look. “Alright, Bunny. I’m officially on the case. Detective Kelsey is here to solve the mystery of the wet and poopy diaper.” Emma rolled her eyes, though she couldn’t help but smile a little. “Great. Just what I needed.” Forensics Kelsey pulled a magnifying glass from the toy bin nearby, holding it up to her eye as she examined Emma’s diaper with exaggerated seriousness. “Hmm,” she murmured, squatting down slightly to get a closer look. “Heavy saturation. Clearly, someone’s been drinking a lot of juice.” Emma covered her face with her hands, her muffled voice protesting, “Kelsey, stop! This is so embarrassing!” Kelsey ignored her, tapping her chin thoughtfully. “Now, let’s see… the poopy part. Hmm, yes. Classic signs of a well-fed daycare bunny. Carrots, maybe some applesauce…” She stood up and pointed dramatically at Emma. “This is a sophisticated mess, Bunny. Someone knew what they were doing.” Emma groaned. “Kelsey, just change me already!” “Oh no, no, no,” Kelsey said, wagging her finger. “This isn’t just a diaper change. This is a crime scene. We need to interview some witnesses.” Before Emma could protest, Kelsey turned toward the playroom and called out, “Alright, everyone! Detective Kelsey is on the case! If you’ve seen anything suspicious, please come forward!” Emma’s jaw dropped as several toddlers toddled over, their curiosity piqued. Tessa, one of the daycare assistants, raised an eyebrow from across the room. “Do I even want to know what’s going on?” she asked. “It’s fine,” Emma muttered, covering her face again. “It’s just Kelsey being Kelsey.” Canvassing for Witnesses Kelsey crouched down to the toddlers’ level, holding up the magnifying glass like a seasoned detective. “Alright, kids,” she said, her voice serious. “Have any of you seen anything strange today? Anyone sneaking around Emma’s diaper?” One of the toddlers, a boy named Milo, pointed at another child. “She took my blocks!” “Noted,” Kelsey said, scribbling in an imaginary notepad. “But we’re looking for diaper-related crimes. Anyone else?” Another toddler piped up, “Emma stinky!” Emma groaned louder, burying her face in her hands. “Kelsey, please!” Kelsey straightened up, nodding solemnly. “Thank you, everyone. Your cooperation has been invaluable.” Part 2: Investigating the Crime Scene The toddlers had dispersed, but Emma was certain she’d never recover from the indignity of having her poopy diaper turned into daycare gossip. She peeked through her fingers at Kelsey, who was now pacing dramatically. “This is no ordinary case, Bunny,” Kelsey announced, spinning on her heel to face Emma. “We’re dealing with a perpetrator who operates in broad daylight, right under everyone’s noses. A serial offender, perhaps.” Emma groaned loudly. “Kelsey, just change me already!” “Oh no,” Kelsey said, shaking her head. “We’re far from done. The trail is fresh. The evidence is overwhelming. We must act swiftly if we’re to catch the culprit.” Emma let her hands fall to her sides, her face bright red. “Kelsey, please,” she whispered. “You’re going to make me die of embarrassment.” Kelsey crouched down to Emma’s eye level, her face serious but her eyes twinkling with mischief. “Bunny,” she said softly, “this is serious. I’m taking this case all the way to the top.” Before Emma could respond, Kelsey straightened up and turned toward the daycare staff. Tessa was wiping down a table nearby, her bright smile faltering slightly as Kelsey marched toward her. Questioning the Witnesses “Tessa,” Kelsey said, holding up the magnifying glass like she was about to grill her in a police procedural. “You were in the room when the alleged crime occurred. Can you account for your whereabouts?” Tessa blinked, clearly trying to figure out what was going on. “Uh… I was setting up snack time,” she said slowly. “What’s this about?” Emma, still rooted to the spot, buried her face in her hands again. “Oh my gosh, Kelsey, stop!” she mumbled into her palms. Kelsey ignored her, narrowing her eyes at Tessa. “Snack time, huh? Convenient. But did you notice anyone acting suspicious? Perhaps a certain Bunny looking shifty?” Tessa’s smile returned as she caught on to the game. “Hmm,” she said, tapping her chin thoughtfully. “Now that you mention it, Emma did seem a little fidgety earlier. But then again, she’s always fidgety.” “Hey!” Emma protested, her hands dropping to her sides. “Don’t help her!” Kelsey nodded, scribbling in her imaginary notebook. “Fidgety… interesting. Suspicious even.” Emma groaned. “I am not the suspect!” Kelsey turned to Tessa again. “Did you happen to notice any… peculiar smells coming from Emma’s general direction?” Tessa laughed, leaning on the table. “Kelsey, I work in daycare. Peculiar smells are part of the job.” Kelsey sighed, tucking the magnifying glass into her waistband. “Fair enough. Thank you for your cooperation, Tessa. But the case is far from closed.” Miss Danielle Enters the Scene Kelsey spun around, her eyes landing on Miss Danielle, who had just walked into the room carrying a clipboard. The daycare owner raised an eyebrow as Kelsey approached, her posture radiating mock seriousness. “Miss Danielle,” Kelsey said, folding her arms. “We’re conducting an investigation into a very serious matter. I need your input.” Miss Danielle looked at Emma, who was doing her best to melt into the wall. “Do I even want to know?” she asked dryly. Kelsey smiled innocently. “Emma’s diaper has been compromised. Someone wet it. And pooped it.” Miss Danielle blinked, then set her clipboard down on the nearest table. “I see,” she said, her tone perfectly deadpan. “And you’re the lead investigator, I assume?” Kelsey nodded. “Detective Kelsey, at your service.” Miss Danielle sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Well, Detective, I can assure you I haven’t seen anyone tampering with Emma’s diaper. But I’ll keep an eye out for suspicious behavior.” “Thank you, Miss Danielle,” Kelsey said, tipping an imaginary hat. “Your cooperation is greatly appreciated.” Emma groaned again, her face buried in her hands. “Kelsey, you’re making me look like an idiot.” “Oh no, Bunny,” Kelsey said, turning to her with a grin. “You’re making you look like an idiot. I’m just here for the ride.” Re-Examining the Evidence Kelsey walked back to Emma and crouched down in front of her, magnifying glass in hand. “Alright, Bunny,” she said. “Let’s review the evidence. Heavy saturation. Applesauce residue. Witnesses placing you at the scene of the crime. It’s not looking good.” Emma crossed her arms, her face still burning. “None of that proves anything.” Kelsey raised an eyebrow. “Oh really? Then how do you explain the fact that you’re the one wearing the wet, poopy diaper?” Emma opened her mouth to argue but immediately closed it again. “I don’t have to explain anything,” she said stubbornly. Kelsey nodded thoughtfully. “Interesting. A very defensive response. That’s exactly what a guilty person would say.” “I am not guilty!” Emma snapped. “We’ll see about that,” Kelsey said, standing up and pulling Emma gently toward the changing table. “But first, let’s clean up the evidence before the scene gets even messier.” Part 3: Solving the Case Emma squirmed as Kelsey led her to the changing table, one hand firmly clasping hers and the other holding the ever-present magnifying glass. The walk felt like a perp walk, and the giggles and curious glances from the toddlers didn’t help. Her face was as red as her hair, and the telltale crinkle of her diaper only made matters worse. “Kelsey, can’t you just change me and solve this later,” Emma whispered urgently. “Oh no, Bunny,” Kelsey said with a dramatic shake of her head. “This is just getting started. You know what they say: justice delayed is justice denied.” Emma groaned. “That’s not how that saying works.” Kelsey stopped in front of the changing table. She let go of Emma’s hand and turned to face the daycare staff and the small group of toddlers who had gathered nearby, their curiosity piqued by the ongoing spectacle. “Alright, everyone,” Kelsey announced, raising the magnifying glass like it was a badge. “We’ve got a real mystery on our hands. Someone—” she paused dramatically, pointing to Emma “—has either pooped Emma’s diaper, or a certain other someone filed a false report about a certain wet and poopy diaper tapes around her waist. And we’re not leaving this room until we get to the bottom of it!” The room erupted in giggles. Even Miss Danielle, who was usually the picture of professionalism, was struggling to suppress a smile. Tessa, leaning against a nearby table, clapped her hands lightly. “This is better than storytime,” she said. Emma crossed her arms, glaring at Kelsey. “I didn’t file a false report! I just… didn’t have all the facts, okay?” The Plot Twist Kelsey ignored her, turning to the toddlers. “Alright, kids,” she said, crouching down. “Detective Kelsey needs your help. We’ve got a mystery to solve. Did anyone see anything suspicious? Maybe someone sneaking into Emma’s diaper?” A little boy named Milo raised his hand eagerly. “Emma stinky!” he declared. Emma slapped her forehead. “Thanks, Milo. Very helpful.” Kelsey nodded solemnly. “Thank you, young man. Your keen observational skills have been noted.” Miss Danielle stepped forward, arms crossed but a smile playing on her lips. “Detective Kelsey,” she said in a mock-serious tone, “do you have any suspects?” Kelsey stood up and spun around dramatically, pointing her magnifying glass at Emma. “As a matter of fact, I do. The evidence points to only one person.” Emma took a step back, holding up her hands. “Oh, no. Don’t even—” “It’s YOU, Bunny!” Kelsey declared, her voice echoing through the playroom. “You’re the prime suspect in the Case of the Wet and Poopy Diaper!” The toddlers gasped audibly, their little hands covering their mouths as if they were part of a courtroom drama. Emma, meanwhile, buried her face in her hands, muttering, “This cannot be happening.” The Interrogation Kelsey pulled out one of the tiny toddler chairs and placed it in front of the changing table. “Take a seat, Bunny,” she said, gesturing grandly. Emma hesitated. “You’re not serious.” “Oh, I’m very serious,” Kelsey replied, her tone dripping with mock gravity. “You’ve been accused of filing a false report. Now sit down, or I’ll have to call in backup.” “Backup?” Emma repeated incredulously. “What backup?” Kelsey turned to Tessa and Miss Danielle, raising her eyebrows. “Ladies, care to assist?” Tessa clapped her hands gleefully. “Oh, absolutely.” Miss Danielle chuckled. “I think we’re all invested in seeing how this plays out.” Emma groaned loudly but reluctantly sat down on the toddler chair with a squish that made her wince, her knees awkwardly bent and her face still burning. “Fine,” she muttered. “But I want it on record that this is ridiculous.” “Noted,” Kelsey said, pretending to jot something down in an imaginary notebook. “Now then, let’s get started. Where were you at approximately snack time today?” Emma blinked. “Snack time? I was here. In daycare. Where else would I be?” Kelsey nodded thoughtfully, pacing back and forth in front of Emma like a detective grilling a suspect. “And what were you doing?” “I don’t know,” Emma said, throwing up her hands. “Playing with blocks and wistfully remembering when I was a normal adult, probably?” Kelsey raised an eyebrow. “Interesting. And during this block-playing session, did you notice anything… unusual?” Emma glared at her. “Aside from this conversation? No.” Kelsey leaned in closer, narrowing her eyes. “Did you, or did you not, feel a certain… squishiness at any point during snack time?” Emma’s jaw dropped. “I am not answering that!” “Oh, I think you just did,” Kelsey said, pointing dramatically. “Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have our confession!” All Parties Heard From The toddlers giggled uncontrollably as Kelsey spun around to face them. “Alright, kids,” she said. “You’ve heard the suspect’s testimony. But do we believe her?” “Nooo!” they chorused, laughing and pointing at Emma. Emma groaned, slumping in the tiny chair. “You’re all traitors,” she muttered under her breath. Tessa stepped forward, pretending to examine Emma with a critical eye. “Detective Kelsey, I have to say, the evidence is pretty compelling.” Miss Danielle nodded. “It’s an open-and-shut case, if you ask me.” Kelsey turned back to Emma, crossing her arms. “Bunny,” she said, her tone suddenly serious, “I need you to come clean. The more you deny it, the worse it’s going to look.” Emma glared at her. “I’m not denying anything! I just… I didn’t know, okay? It’s not like I have a diaper radar or something.” Kelsey leaned in, her face mere inches from Emma’s. “So, you’re saying the diaper just… magically filled itself?” Emma hesitated, realizing too late that she’d backed herself into a corner. “I mean… maybe?” Kelsey straightened up, shaking her head. “Bunny, Bunny, Bunny,” she said with exaggerated disappointment. “Lying to a detective? That’s a serious offense.” The Final Confession By now, the entire daycare was in stitches. Even Emma couldn’t suppress a smile, though she tried to hide it by biting her lip. Kelsey, ever the performer, wasn’t about to let up. “I’m giving you one last chance, Bunny,” she said, pulling out the magnifying glass again. “Did you, or did you not, wet and poop this diaper?” Emma looked at the toddlers, at Tessa and Miss Danielle, and finally back at Kelsey. Her face was still beet red, but there was a twinkle of reluctant amusement in her eyes. “Fine,” she said, throwing up her hands. “I did it! It was me! I wet the diaper, and I pooped it too. Are you happy now?” The room erupted in cheers, the toddlers clapping and laughing as if they’d just witnessed the conclusion of an epic courtroom drama. Kelsey grinned, tucking the magnifying glass into her pocket. “Case closed,” she said triumphantly. “Detective Kelsey always gets her Bunny.” Emma groaned, hiding her face in her hands again. “You’re the worst,” she muttered, though the smile tugging at her lips betrayed her true feelings. Part 4: The Arrest and Trial of Emma Bunny The room had returned to its usual hum of daycare activity, but Emma lay flat on the changing on the changing table, the strap buckled over her chest like a defendant shackled for trial. She crossed her arms over her chest, her cheeks still pink from the ridiculous spectacle Kelsey had orchestrated. Kelsey, however, was just getting started. With an exaggerated flourish, she pulled a toddler-sized chair over to sit beside the changing table. She stood on it, holding her imaginary notebook in one hand and the toy magnifying glass in the other. “All rise!” Kelsey announced in a dramatic voice, her tone echoing that of a stern courtroom judge. She cast a mock glare at Emma, whose jaw dropped. “You’re kidding,” Emma said, her blush deepening. Kelsey ignored her, pounding on the side of the changing table like a judge’s gavel. “We’re now in session to determine the guilt—or, let’s face it, the obvious guilt—of one Emma Bunny.” Emma groaned, covering her face. “I confessed! This is so unnecessary,” she mumbled through her hands. Kelsey grinned. “The court disagrees. Let the trial begin!” Presenting the Evidence Kelsey stood up, circling the changing table as though addressing an invisible jury. “Ladies, gentlemen, and toddlers,” she began, her voice filled with dramatic flair. “We have before us a diaper—no, a crime scene—that is soaked, squishy, and suspicious. But that is not the crime we are hear for today. No, we are hear because this defendant is accused of filing a false report of tampered pampers. Let’s review the evidence, shall we?” Emma peeked through her fingers, already cringing. “Kelsey…” “Exhibit A!” Kelsey announced, pointing to Emma’s diaper. “The wetness levels. Unprecedented. Saturation like this doesn’t just happen, folks. It takes determination. Guts. And, dare I say it, juice boxes.” The toddlers giggled from their spots nearby, clearly loving every second of this. Emma, however, was sinking further into the changing table. “Exhibit B!” Kelsey continued, holding up an imaginary document. “The poopy part. Experts—aka me—have confirmed traces of applesauce and carrots. Classic daycare lunch items.” Emma groaned. “Why do you have to say it like that?” “And finally,” Kelsey said, leaning in close to Emma with a playful smirk, “Exhibit 😄 a full confession from the accused.” Emma sat up, pointing a finger at Kelsey. “You interrogated me! That confession doesn’t count.” Kelsey raised an eyebrow. “Objection overruled.” Emma threw her hands up in defeat. “This is ridiculous.” The Sentencing Kelsey turned back to the imaginary jury, her tone suddenly solemn. “Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve heard the evidence. We’ve seen the crime scene. And we’ve heard the accused’s very own words. There’s only one verdict that makes sense.” She paused dramatically, pointing at Emma. “Emma Bunny, you are hereby sentenced to the title of… Poopy Diaper Princess!” The toddlers erupted in laughter, clapping and pointing at Emma as she covered her face in both hands. “Oh my gosh, Kelsey, why?” she whined, her voice muffled. Kelsey ignored her, pulling out an imaginary crown and placing it on Emma’s head. “Your royal highness,” she said, bowing deeply. “May your reign be squishy and long.” Emma peeked out from behind her hands, glaring at Kelsey. “You are impossible.” “And yet,” Kelsey said, her grin widening, “you still love me.” Emma groaned but couldn’t suppress the small smile tugging at her lips. “Maybe.” The Punishment Kelsey set the toy magnifying glass aside and climbed up onto the changing table beside Emma. “Alright, Bunny,” she said, her tone softening. “You’ve been sentenced. But every royal needs a little TLC, don’t you think?” Emma narrowed her eyes. “What are you planning?” “Oh, nothing much,” Kelsey said innocently, leaning closer. “Just this!” She lunged forward, wrapping her arms around Emma and planting a loud, smacking kiss on her cheek. Emma squealed, trying to squirm away, but Kelsey held on tight. “Stop it!” Emma cried, though the giggle bubbling up in her throat betrayed her. Kelsey grinned, pulling back just enough to wiggle her fingers in front of Emma’s face. “Tickle monster is coming!” she teased. “No, no, no!” Emma protested, laughing uncontrollably as Kelsey’s fingers found her sides. She squirmed and giggled, her attempts to escape half-hearted at best. “Admit it,” Kelsey said between tickles. “You’re the best Poopy Diaper Princess there ever was!” “Never!” Emma gasped, her laughter ringing through the playroom. Kelsey relented after a few more moments, letting Emma catch her breath. Emma sighed heavily, leaning against Kelsey’s shoulder as the giggles subsided. “You’re ridiculous,” she murmured. “And you love me for it,” Kelsey replied, wrapping an arm around Emma’s shoulders. Emma didn’t respond right away, letting herself relax into Kelsey’s embrace. She felt safe, warm, and oddly comforted despite the embarrassing spectacle. After a moment, she nodded. “Yeah,” she said softly. “I do.” Kelsey pressed a gentle kiss to the top of Emma’s head. “Good,” she said. “Now, my little Bunny, let’s get you changed before your royal doodies overwhelm the kingdom.” Part 5: Aftermath Emma lay on the changing table, her cheeks still pink from all the teasing and laughter. Kelsey, ever the performer, stood beside her, snapping a fresh pair of gloves onto her hands with the exaggerated air of a surgeon about to perform a life-saving procedure. “Alright, Bunny,” Kelsey said, picking up a pack of wipes and holding it up like it was a magic wand. “Let the official cleanup commence. We’re about to restore law and order to this chaotic diaper situation.” Emma groaned, covering her face with her hands. “Kels, can’t you just… do it quietly? Like a normal person?” “Quietly?” Kelsey repeated, feigning shock. “Bunny, where’s the fun in that? If you’re going to commit crimes against your pampers, you’ve got to be ready to face the music.” Narrating the Cleanup Kelsey opened the diaper with the theatrical flair of someone opening a treasure chest. “Oh my,” she said, pretending to gasp. “It’s worse than I thought. We’ve got a Code Brown, ladies and gentlemen.” Emma groaned loudly, her hands flying back up to cover her face. “Kelsey, stop! You’re going to scar me for life.” Kelsey ignored her, holding up a wipe like it was a forensic tool. “Time to neutralize the evidence,” she announced. “We’ll start with the perimeter. Standard cleanup procedure, of course.” She narrated each step as she worked, her tone a mix of mock professionalism and playful amusement. “Wipe one: initial contact. Wipe two: backup support. Wipe three: the unsung hero, taking care of those hard-to-reach places.” Emma couldn’t help but laugh despite herself, her giggles muffled by her hands. “You’re ridiculous.” “And you’re adorable,” Kelsey shot back, grinning as she tossed the used wipes into the nearby bin. “Now, let’s address the… ahem… squishy situation.” She lifted Emma’s legs gently, sliding the soiled diaper out from under her and folding it up with practiced ease. “Ladies and gentlemen,” she said, holding up the rolled diaper, “we’ve officially neutralized the crime scene.” Emma peeked out again, her cheeks still flushed. “Can we not call it a crime scene?” “But Bunny, that’s exactly what it was,” Kelsey teased, grabbing the fresh diaper from the shelf. “And now, justice will be served. Or in this case, taped securely.” Fresh and Clean Kelsey unfolded the new diaper with a dramatic flourish, shaking it out like she was prepping a parachute. “Here we go,” she said, sliding it under Emma with care. “The fresh start every Poopy Diaper Princess deserves.” Emma rolled her eyes but couldn’t suppress the small smile tugging at her lips. “You’re never letting that title go, are you?” “Not a chance,” Kelsey replied, grinning as she secured the first tape. “You earned it fair and square.” She fastened the second tape with a satisfying pat, then gave the front of the diaper a playful tap. “And there we have it, folks! A fresh, clean Bunny, ready to take on the world—or at least survive until nap time.” Emma sat up, adjusting her sweatshirt to cover the top of her diaper. “Thanks, Kels,” she said softly, her blush fading as the warmth of Kelsey’s care replaced her earlier embarrassment. Words of Reassurance Kelsey crouched down to Emma’s eye level, her expression turning gentle. “Bunny,” she said, brushing a stray strand of red hair out of Emma’s face, “I want you to remember something, okay?” Emma tilted her head, curious. “What?” “You can always come to me,” Kelsey said, her voice warm and steady. “Whether it’s a soaked diaper, a poopy one, or even just a bad day. You don’t have to be scared or embarrassed. I’m always here to help.” Emma’s eyes softened, and she felt a lump form in her throat. “Even if it’s, like, a lot?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. Kelsey chuckled, pulling Emma into a hug. “Even if it’s a lot,” she said. “Especially if it’s a lot.” Emma sighed, leaning into Kelsey’s embrace. She felt safe, like she could let go of all her worries and just be herself. “Thanks, Kels,” she murmured. “Always, Bunny,” Kelsey replied, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of Emma’s head. “Now, let’s get you ready for nap time.” Nap Time Kelsey led Emma over to the nap mats, where the toddlers were already settling in. She grabbed Emma’s favorite blanket from her cubby—a soft, worn pink one with little stars embroidered along the edges—and tucked it around her. Emma lay down with a content sigh, the fresh diaper crinkling softly as she shifted. Kelsey crouched beside her, smoothing the blanket and giving her a reassuring smile. “Sweet dreams, Poopy Diaper Princess,” Kelsey teased, her voice barely above a whisper. Emma groaned, though the corners of her mouth twitched upward. “You’re never going to stop calling me that, are you?” “Not a chance,” Kelsey replied, brushing her fingers lightly against Emma’s cheek. “Now get some rest. You’ve had a busy day solving mysteries.” Emma closed her eyes, a small smile lingering on her lips as she drifted off. And for the first time that day, she didn’t feel embarrassed. She just felt loved. _______________________ I'm going to start posting more stories about Emma and Kelsey on my Ream or SubStar!

**The Great Diaper Dilemma: It was a quiet Saturday afternoon when I decided to embrace my inner little for the day. I pulled out my favorite onesie, grabbed a fresh diaper, and settled in for a cozy Netflix binge. Of course, my plan was to enjoy the peace and quiet, but little did I know, the universe had other plans… First, I realized I was running low on snacks. Naturally, I thought, “Why not pop out for a quick grocery run in my onesie and diaper?” After all, it was the perfect opportunity to test out my stealthy outfit. So, I waltzed to the car, already feeling a little mischievous. As soon as I pulled into the parking lot, I spotted a friend from work. He was waving enthusiastically, clearly oblivious to my, let’s say, *non-standard* attire. I panicked, pulled my hoodie over my onesie, and tried to casually stride into the store, hoping no one would notice the slight rustling from my diaper with every step. I walked past the deli counter, the cereal aisle, and then, BAM! I turned the corner and smacked straight into the display of canned beans. The cans clattered everywhere, drawing all eyes to me. My face turned a shade of crimson as I tried to pick up the mess—clumsily bending over, praying that my onesie stayed securely in place. Of course, just as I was about to retreat, I looked up and saw that my friend had followed me in. He was laughing so hard he almost couldn’t breathe. “What’s the rush?” he asked, eyes wide. “You look like you’re about to *diaper* the whole store!” I froze. There it was—the comment I had feared most. With a sheepish grin, I muttered, “It’s not what it looks like… well, okay, it’s exactly what it looks like.” Long story short, I made a quick exit, red-faced but with a bag full of snacks and an embarrassing memory for the books. Moral of the story? If you’re going to embrace your ABDL side in public, maybe leave the onesie and diaper for the comfort of your own home… unless you’re really in the mood for some unexpected adventures. P.S. The beans are still on sale.

Anyone with an accent over here? Anyone say "dem", instead of "them"? "Aluminium" instead of "non-magnetic" (J/K) "aluminum"? 👋🖐😄🤘 I'll go first. I say "dat's" all of the time, ahahah! EG.: Dats it! I'm from Long Island N.Y., and first generation American, Jamaican. I want this to be fun, XD. Tell me about the "saucers" that are "sorcerers" but sound similar. Dat's = That's Tree = Three 😆

Boom. Glass and brick shoots out from the side of the Central City Research Institute, showering the surrounding yard with debris, hitting nearby skyscrapers and busting out further windows with the aftershock. Outside, civilians scream and run, scattering in all directions, fleeing in terror from the smoke that billows from the institute’s rapid unscheduled exit. A coiled metal hose shoots out, four claws at the end slamming down over the nearest fire hydrant. Water sprays, and is then consumed, pumping into the hose at an incredible pace. Another hose launches out and stabs into dirt, a point of leverage. From within, the creature releases a sloshy, sucking bellow, and drags itself out. Forty feet tall, with a dozen such hoses extending from its base, it’s made of steel and pristine white porcelain. Without legs or wheels, it can only drag itself forward with the hoses, leaving deep furrows in the ground behind it where its weight tears up dirt and pavement alike. Resembling nothing more than an enormous mechanized toilet, the creature rampages free out into the streets of Central City. Most people run. One man, tie flapping in the wind, is caught by the hoses. The mecha’s lid opens, and he’s thrown inside, screaming until it slams shut, flushes, and he’s lost beneath. Only two people aren’t fleeing. One–a girl named Kelly–has stopped, confused, staring at the other. She frowns, uncertain what she’s looking at. The other is a young woman, dressed in a business casual top and loose skirt, half-moon glasses hiding bright blue eyes. She’s crouched by the sidewalk, knees spread, face screwed up and cheeks puffed out as she pushes. Noticing she has an audience, she puffs and grunts, “Do you–mind?” “Um…” Kelly says, distracted as another flushing bellow echoes a hundred feet away. “What are you doing?” The crouching woman shoots her a glare. “Pooping myself, what does it look like?” Kelly stammers a moment longer, then her attention is stolen. A hundred feet away, the mecha seizes a car and flings it with no particular aim–it skips and skids over the pavement, bouncing off a parked bus, and careens straight towards her. She can only stare, a deer caught in the headlights, until– Wham! A blur of pink interjects itself between her and the car. The vehicle stops, bouncing off like the tide against rocks. Standing where the car just hit, wielding a baby rattle with a head as large as a basketball and shield reminiscent of a pacifier guard, stands the woman–her glasses are gone, and her hair has billowed out into long pigtails, but he recognizes her anyways. She’s suckling a pacifier that matches her shield, and her clothes have vanished, replaced by a pink top and a skirt barely four inches long, doing nothing to hide the drooping diaper between her legs. “Who are you?” Kelly asks. Her eyes glow as she responds, floating slowly up from the ground with every word. Though she has a pacifier in her mouth, it makes her voice no less clear. “With the might in my Moonbeam Rattle, and the power of my Baby’s Guard, I am Starlight Boom-Boom–Champion of Earth!” She drops back down, stretching out her arms. “You should run.” “Did you–are you–” Kelly stammers. “Why’d you poop your pants?” “I had to fight,” Starlight replies, simply, before turning and lunging at the mechanized toilet. Rotating, the monster points one of its many hoses at Starlight, blasting her with a jet of water powerful enough to cut through steel beams. Starlight raises her shield, deflecting the blow, but the force of the aqua jet throws her back into a nearby hot dog stand and she collapses through it. She stands up, bloodied but–no, wait. She stands up, covered in ketchup but ready to get back into the fight. Kelly stares. The street has cleared, but she can’t help but watch as the poopy-pampered superheroine goes to battle with the colossal commode. She slips under its next water jet, dodges around a swipe, and yells out a shrill battle cry: “Massive Rattle Blow!” She brings her toy down on its porcelain body, sending a spiderweb of cracks across its body before jumping up and grabbing the toilet tank cover. She flips it over and dives inside, seizing the unfortunate businessman who’s sodden but still breathing. Setting him off on the sidewalk, she runs back towards the fray. Uninterested in her, the toilet drags itself forward, seizing another fire hydrant and pumping water away from the city, into itself. As it does, the hydration seals the cracks that Starlight just opened, healing from the damage she inflicted. Starlight leaps at it again, but this time, the monster is ready–a hose arm lashes out, seizes her immediately, and pounds her into the ground repeatedly, flinging her back and forth like a ragdoll. Her rattle goes flying, and she’s ultimately tossed aside, slumping against a nearby wall. “Starlight!” Kelly calls, running towards the , but before she can make it ten steps, Starlight is standing again, knees wavering. Kelly hesitates, stride catching, wondering aloud, “What is she…doing…oh.” With a blrrttch that echoes across the open city street, Starlight Boom-Boom fulfills her namesake, her diaper expanding to the size of a swollen beach ball beneath her absurdly short miniskirt. The mass stains her padding a deep brown and it falls with a fwump, drooping to the tops of her knees, but something in the act seems to energize her. She stands taller, if bow-legged, and extends her hand. Kelly catches the shucka-shucka sound and ducks as the rattle whizzes over her head, flying into Starlight’s hand. Reinvigorated, the heroine charges at the mecha again, moving so fast that she leaves blurred air and a faint green puff of smell behind her. “Lightning Potty Strike!” Expecting the fight to turn, Kelly watches, but it seems futile–every blow that Starlight rains down, the monster seems able to effortlessly heal, soaking up water from the city’s many fire hydrants. It continues wailing at her, jets of icy water and flailing hoses trying to swipe at the heroine, but though its many attacks miss, it just doesn’t seem to care–it continues dragging itself across Main Street, moving with purpose, tossing cars and ripping up hydrants in its wake. So, Kelly does something the heroine can’t–she turns and runs towards the Central City Research Institute. The smoke has mostly cleared by the time she picks her way through the broken wall. Inside is chaos–shards of broken toilets are everywhere, and shelves of toilet paper, tissues, and even golf balls have been strewn aside, making the space a tripping hazard to navigate. Beneath one of those racks, a man coughs, reaching out weakly. “Help…” Kelly runs to him. She’s not imbued with any super strength, and loading up her panties won’t help her do any heroic feats, but with a bit of grunting she lifts the shelf. “What is that thing?” “Forgive us,” the scientist stammers, crawling out on hands and knees. His faint German accent seems faded by time in the US, but still comes through ever so slightly. “We…we knew not the forces with which we meddled.” “I don’t understand,” Kelly says. “Why did you make this… thing?” “We were blinded by ambition,” he whispers hoarsely, fumbling to pick up his glasses from the ground. “We desired only to create the world’s most advanced toilet, but we pushed the limits of morality and science alike. Our hubris was our downfall–we taught it to fix itself, and to flush, but never morality.” Fearing at his words, Kelly asks, “What is it? What is it?” He swallows. “It’s the Potty Monster.” Grabbing him by the shoulders, Kelly demands, “Do you know what it wants?” Eyes huge behind thick glass, he can only speak the answer in a whisper, “Water.” Kelly understands. “The treatment plant–it’s going for the treatment plant?” “You must stop it,” he says, nodding quickly. “If it gets there, it’ll be unstoppable!” Kelly turns, running out into the street to warn Starlight, but she’s met quickly with a streak of pink and brown, soaring through the air and crashing into the dirt next to her. Starlight stands up, wiping away drool from her chin and under her pacifier guard, mumbling, “Meaniehead caught me napping–won’t happen again.” “It’s trying to get to the water treatment plant!” Kelly warns. “It’s using water to heal,” Starlight adds. “I can’t let that happen!” “What are you going to do?” Starlight turns pink. “Um…Could you not watch for this part? There’s not much left in the tank, but…erm…” Kelly nods, politely averting her gaze, though she can’t avert her sense of smell or turn off her ears. Starlight’s grunts of effort are obvious, trying to get out every last bit of muck, and the blrrrch and blorts rumbling in her diaper are hardly subtle. When Kelly looks back, the abused garment is so full and heavy it’s well past her knees, and Starlight’s steps squelch like she’s waddling through waist deep mud, but her stride seems to only have gotten quicker. Lunging forward into the air, she dives at the Potty Monster once again, crossing a full city block in a single smelly bound. Huffing and puffing, Kelly runs to the side of the street, unable to keep up with the super. After half a block, she gives up, resting her hands on her knees. “Too… much… running.” Two blocks down, Starlight brings her rattle down, swiping away. Where she hits, porcelain cracks and chips, shards scattering into the street, but water surges out of those cracks and heals them as quickly as she can deal damage. And, though she’s stronger and more agile, Starlight is weighed down, dragging her swollen diaper behind her. She evades, blocks, and parries the hoses and claws lashing out at her, readying for an almighty attack. “Ultimate! Tantrum! Forever!” Discarding her shield, she takes the rattle in both hands, raises it, and prepares to bring it down, but the intelligence behind the Potty Monster gets wise–lashing out from behind her where she can’t quickly see or react, and instead of going for an arm or a leg it grabs her by the diaper. Starlight swallows. “Oh, no–” Wham! The Potty Monster flings her down, so hard it leaves a crater in the pavement. Before she can stand, it strikes her again, knocking her against a brick wall, then seizes her by the leg and flips its seat up. Swinging her rattle wildly, she tries to bat away the claw holding her, but it grabs her with half a dozen more, rips under her skirt, and with a loud, splorchy, fwump, her diaper falls off and lands inside the toilet. The seat slams shut, and with a floosh, Starlight’s power is flushed away. Her outfit bursts into light, and her weapons vanish. Now harmless, the woman is tossed aside, thrown into a row of hedges out in front of a cafe. She stands, staggering, trying to fight again, but her strength is gone, and even when she balls up her face and tries to push, nothing comes out. “Starlight!” Kelly calls, pedaling furiously on a borrowed bike to catch up to the . “Are you okay?” Starlight looks at her, terrified and helpless. “I can’t–it changed my diaper! I can’t fight!” Ditching the bike, Kelly runs up to her. “Can’t you go again? Just…go on yourself, like before?” Shaking her head, Starlight lifts her skirt to show that her stained panties have returned. “I’m…empty. Can’t keep going.” “Gotcha.” Kelly looks around. “Then…is there someone else? We can’t let the Potty Monster reach the treatment plant.” “There’s…” Starlight hesitates. “Er, there’s one way.” Kelly nods. “What? Do you need something?” Reaching into her blouse pocket, Starlight hands Kelly a chocolate bar wrapped in aluminum foil. “Eat this. The whole thing.” “Okay,” Kelly says, acting on impulse–there was no time to question. Chomping down on the bar, she chews and swallows. “What was that?” “Laxative,” Starlight explains, producing a small pacifier clip from her purse. “Clip this to your shirt.” “L–laxative?” Kelly says with a start, blinking. Starlight just shakes her head. “Hurry.” Kelly pins on the clip, nodding. “And?” “Congratulations, you’re a temporary member of the Boom Boom force,” Starlight explains. “Pick a name, and then…squat down.” “Oh,” Kelly says, realizing. She feels her tummy gurgle, the laxatives already working their way down in her system. “Um…name. Name… how about just ‘Mega’? That’s got a classic feel to it.” “Alright.” Starlight pats her on the head, in something between a gesture of affection and a knighting. “I pronounce you Mega Boom-Boom.” Blinking and shaking her head, Kelly starts to say, “Wait, I get the last name too? But–” Before she can finish her thought, the laxatives kick in, and she feels her panties suddenly swell with an impossible tidal wave of mush. And, in that same moment, she changes. Her hair doubles in length, braiding itself into pigtails, and her outfit vanishes–fabric transmuting in seconds from pants and a t-shirt to a billowy, heavily laced green dress that only comes down slightly further than Starlight’s skirt, white frills keeping the hem line poofy. And, of course, her panties changed too, thickening, becoming absorbent, becoming protective enough to deal with the sudden catastrophe between her legs. The expanding mess pours out of her, bloating her diaper until it’s at least as impressive as Starlight’s had been; a mud bath taped around her waist. Above all, though, she suddenly felt strong. Powerful, surging with adrenaline like she’d never experienced. “Do I get a weapon?” she asked, noting her empty hands. “Pick one,” Starlight says. “Name it, and it’ll come to you.” “Okay,” Kelly says, the mudslide into her diaper ceasing. Turning, she says, “I already know what I want.” With that, she dashes forward, kicking off the pavement so hard it left a pothole. Crossing a city block in a single bound, leaving a stink trail in her wake, Kelly–Mega Boom-Boom–soars at the back of the Potty Monster, hand outstretched. It was only a block away from the treatment plant now–too close. “My weapon is–” she calls out, grabbing the top of the tank, “A plunger! In her hands, a plastic and rubber tool as long as she is tall, with a plunging head two feet wide, appears. Suddenly full of terror, the Potty Monster shrieks, hoses lunging at Mega, but she bats them away, wielding the plunger like a polearm. One hose manages to whack her on the butt and she tumbles forward, landing on the seat, but with a thrust she sticks the plunger head to the toilet seat and–with a handhold to grab onto–she flips back into the air. And, coming to her as naturally as breathing, she identifies the names of her attacks in the same breath that she unleashes them. “Suction Love Strike!” she calls, using the leverage to pry the lid open, though the Potty Monster fights her. Whipping around and grabbing the open lid with a free hand, she keeps it open, raises her plunger, and thrusts it down into the Potty Monster’s open bowl. “You’ve gone far enough!” The monster shrieks and sloshes, water backing up suddenly as her plunger seals the hole, preventing any water flow. Its hoses try to spray her, but they fizzle out without pressure and hiss harmlessly at her, water trickling from the nozzles. “Mega Plunge Forever!” Squatting so low her diaper touches the rim, Mega Boom-Boom ensures her plunger isn’t going anywhere, then lunges up, driving her fist into the porcelain of the Potty Monster. It cracks thunderously, and this time, though it shrieks and tries to bat her away, nothing heals the wounds. Raising up her free hand, a hairbrush large enough to serve a pizza on appears, a secondary weapon for which only one move could be possible: “ONE THOUSAND SPANKS JUSTICE!” Bringing down the flat of the brush, she unleashes an infinity of lightning attacks. Blow after blow, raining down spanks against porcelain that can no longer repair itself. In desperation, the Potty Monster drags itself towards the water treatment plant entrance, but Mega stops it once and for all. Jumping up, she hits the handle, and with a floosh, water floods into the bowl, and with nowhere else to go, starts spilling over the top. Drained of its power and energy, the Potty Monster shrieks, shudders, and stops. With a final, almighty blow, Mega Boom-Boom leaps up, brings her messy, diapered butt down in a finisher move, and blasts the potty into porcelain powder. In the debris, all that’s left is a small terminal and an array of wiggling hoses, disconnected from the monster’s body. Mega picks up the terminal, turning it over in her hands. ‘Property of Central City Research Institute’, it read, written on the side in white marker. ‘Proprietary–if found, return to Doctor Stein Von Kindchen.’ She looks around. Overhead, news helicopters have their cameras directed at her, and from the surrounding buildings, civilians come out to see if the coast is clear. Diaper on full display, stained and smushy, Mega Boom-Boom blushes. From the side of the street, though, Starlight limps towards her. “You did it.” “I did,” Mega says. “My face–I don’t look any different, even if my clothes–” “Don’t worry,” Starlight promises, stepping up and squeezing her hand. “Nobody will recognize you. I can help you change, that’ll return you to normal.” Mega smiles, a bit of Kelly shining through. “Thanks.” Nodding to the terminal, Starlight asks, “Doctor Stein von Kindchen? Who’s that?” Looking down, Mega Boom-Boom crushes the terminal in her hands, destroying the research once and for all. “Just someone who needs to work on his Potty Training.” ... I hope you had fun with this creative indulgence in tropey, shlocky, stinky fun! If you want to support my writing and get early access, bonus content, and my gratitude, you can do so here! Or if you'd rather do SubscribeStar instead of Patreon - the services are the same, so it's down to platform preference - click here!

"So I'll have a venti mocha latte with oat milk, a shot of strawberry flavor, and extra whip cream. Also, a tall black coffee with one cream," the blond haired boy said, smiling at the short, brown haired barista that stood behind the counter. "Oh, and my name's Alex, and she's Kacey." The Starbucks was almost empty that day. It was a grey day, cool for the summer, and few wanted to brave the inevitable rain. However, the weather that kept people out made it perfect for hot drinks, and that drew latte addicts in like flies. This particular one, in the center of a book store, combined two of their rainy day loves. "Ok, who gets the coffee and who gets the strawberry chocolate milk thing?" the barista asked. "Ummm... I..." Kacey came beside him and put her hand on his shoulder. "He gets the strawberry drink. I get the coffee." "Ok!" The barista said, and left to make the drinks. "Did you have to say that?" Alex asked the red haired girl who was clinging to his shoulder. "Yep! If your going to order something like that, the world will know." "Alex! Happy almost-birthday!" "What?" Alex said. It was Bill, a friend of his from work. He was a tall man, broad shouldered, and wore a long rain coat. He had come in while they were waiting. "I said happy almost-birthday!" Alex cocked his head to the left. "How did you know it was almost my brithday?" "Uhhh..." he said. His eyes darted to Kacey, then back at Alex. "Facebook." Alex looked suprised. "Huh. I thought I had removed that from Facebook. How weird. He turned back to the counter, unaware of Kacey glaring at Bill. "So how you doing anyway Alex? Funny to run into you here," Bill said. "Well you know I..." He was interrupted by the appearance of the barisa. "Alright I have a venti strawberry mocha made with oat milk and extra whip cream for Alex." She handed him the drink. Alex blushed. "Uhhh I think you mean a coffee. Dark coffee. NO cream or sugar." "No it was definitely a venti strawberry mocha made with oat milk and extra whip cream." Alex shook his head and looked at Bill. "No it was definitely a coffee. Your strongest kind." The barista leaned onto the counter top. "Alright. I tell you what. I'll go get you that coffee, the strongest kind we have, with no sugar or milk, but I get to see you drink it. Right here in front of us, no leaving to throw it out when your gone, no coming back in for your sugary drink." Alex stared at her considering his options. Kacey snickered beside him. "Just give me the #($@-ing strawberry mocha." ... Kacey was laughing out loud as the walked in through their front door. "OOOO LOOK AT ME I"M ALEX! I ONLY DRINK THE STRONGEST COFFEE SINCE I"M BIG AND STRONG!" she said, doing her best to imitate her voice. "Unless no one is watching then I only want my warm choccy milk." Their home was a small suburban townhouse. It was older then most but still strong, and they had repainted the walls of the main floor in deep blues and dark colors, then furnished it with wood and and simple couches. A door in front of them lead to their stair well, and on the top floor the colors began to get brighter and more vibrant, and the furniture shifted from classy to comfy. The ground floor was the 'mature' floor they showed to visitors, the top was more for them. Alex was hanging his head as he sipped his drink. "Yeah yeah yeah," he said. "So, how did he know it was my birthday soon? I don't remember mentioning it to anyone at work." Kacey paused. "Ummmm well you know how these things are. Someone hears something then they tell another then it passes to two more, and suddenly everyone knows. Its common knowledge. Everyone knows each others birthdays." "What is your uncles birthday?" She looked to the side, thinking. "November 31st?" "That's not real. There are only thirty days in November," Alex said, while going over the rhyme in his head and counting on his fingers. "December first then." "Ahh, that makes sense." He stripped off his coat, and began to take off his shoes. He was going along with it, but seemed unconvinced. "Anyway, its a big birhday for you. Afterall it is your thi.." "Twenty-seventh? You are right, that is a big one," he replied. She folded her arms. "Twenty-seventh? I could have sworn we had that a few years ago." "Well you were mistaken. I'm turning 27." He looked up at Kacey, who was standing still."What are you doing?" he asked. "Why aren't you getting undressed?" "I need to go," she said quickly, looking out the door. Alex stood up and looked out. "What for?" "Uhhh... Coffee." "We just got coffee." "I mean, copy. I need to make copies of something for work." "Oh." Alex put his hand on his chin. "Can't you just do that with our printer here?" "No. They need to be better. You know, professionally done. Glossy and all that." "Ok, should I come to help?" "NO! I mean, no, its for work. You stay here and, ummm... video games." She pointed up the stairs, toward their bedroom where they kept their gaming systems. Alex turned to where she was pointing. "You are actually telling me to go upstairs and play video games? Why?" "Why not?" she asked. "Don't you want to play video games?" Alex paused and thought. "Yeah I do." "Good! Then go!" She turned around to leave, then paused and turned back. "Oh wait! Remember to wear headphones! Bye! Love you!" That being said, she turned and ran out the door before Alex could ask anything more. Alex waved. "Love you too." He watched her run to the car, quickly open the door and get in, then drive away. "That was odd, I wonder why she was acting that way? Why specify headphones?" He thought for a second, then shrugged. "Ah well. Video game time!" He walked up the stair well to their bedroom. It was painted blue, and with cabinets and shelves built around a large king sized bed. There was a TV screwed into the wall in front of the bed with their gaming systems underneath it, but Alex ignored it for a moment. Instead, he walked to a single white door that lead to their closet and opened it. He pushed aside their hanging shirts and dresses until he found what he was looking for. A large, brown plastic box with a sealed green lid, which he unlocked and opened. "There we go," he said, staring at the packages of diapers inside. ... "Ok, quick. We only have a few minutes," Kacey said to the gathered crowed. She knew most of them, and most of the ones she didn't she had at least seen in Alex's photos or facebook pages. There was Bill from Alex's work, who they had run into earlier, then Tim from his university days, then Sarah who he knew through her, and more. It was all their friends, gathered for one reason. "So the plan is to enter the house as quietly as possible, holding the packages and balloons. I'll text him to come down, and we will shout "Surprise" as he does. He'll probably be playing video games with his headphones, so it should work." "You don't think he'll notice a crowd of people entering his home?" Bill asked. Kacey scoffed. "Please. Fuck no. When he's playing video games that guy wouldn't noticed a crowed of rhinoceroses entering his home." They all laughed and agreed. "Well we shouldn't have any problems then," Bill said. "Of course not," Kacey replied. "Unless..." A thought came to her head. He was home alone, just relaxing and having fun... her eyes went wide. Would he? She had only been gone a few minutes, but he did just get home, and its not like he was rare. She went through scenarios in her head, trying to think of a way she could avoid it without warning him. She got out her phone and texted him. "I'll be home soon! Want to go to the movies? I figure we can have 'fun' times tonight after, if you are down for that ;)" she sent him. Hopefully he'd see it, decide to stay in normal clothes for the movie, and be willing to put off any 'other' things until later. She told herself it would work, and prayed she was right.

"Goodnight you two! Have a nice break!" "Thank you! We will!" Jack replied to his departing parents. He grasped his girlfriend, Jill, in his arms as they both waved goodbye, then shut the front door. It was the first week of summer vacation from university. His parents were going on their own vacation, and his summer job didn't start for another three weeks. That meant.. "Well hello there sweetheart. It seems we have the house all to ourselves," Jill said, as she turned toward him and hugged him tight. He looked down at her head and kissed her soft brown hair, then leaned back and lifted her off the ground. "WHOAH!" she shouted, and laughed as he swung her. "Careful! Don't drop me!" Arguably there was a risk. She was shorter then he was, and thin, but not by too much. His relatively short stature and narrow build wasn't great for swinging people around with confidence. He settled her down and they stared at each other- her blue eyes meeting their brown. Suddenly, he laughed. "Soooo house party?" he said. She laughed with him and put a hand on his chest. "Maybe, but not right now. I want a weekend with us alone," she winked at him when she said that, and he smiled and nodded. "Also, there is something I want to try tonight." "Ooooo something fun? Something kinky?" He asked. She rolled her eyes. "Well, it can be. But not what I mean. Come on, I want to show you, its up in our bags." She took him by the hand and lead him up stairs, towards the bedrooms. The house wasn't huge, but was big enough to comfortably fit a family. The floors were all carpeted, and the bright yellow walls and decorations matched his parents slighted dated tastes. His was the last on the left in a hall of three doors. It was still very much a "teenager" bedroom, as he hadn't stayed in it regularly since leaving for college. Having met Jill there, he hadn't been planning his weekends to sleep in a bed where his parents could hear him. However, that wasn't where they were heading. "Wait, I'm thirsty. Can I get a glass of water before we do anything?" Jack pointed to the bathroom. "I don't want to be dehydrated and not be able to... you know..." She rolled her eyes. "We aren't doing that yet. Come on!" She pulled him into the second door, the spare bedroom. While his parents were well aware of what university students would do when alone together, they liked to at least PRETEND that their plans weren't obvious. So, in order to keep the appearance up, Jill had been officially exiled to the spare bedroom. This, however, lead to some other issues. "I still can't believe they want to do this," Jack said. "I think its cute!" Jill replied. "They want a bigger family!" "You don't think they are too old?" "No, not by half. Plenty of people do it later in life now. We live so much longer then we used to, its perfectly fine." "I know, but still," Jack shook his head. "What?" She giggled and smiled at him. "Say what you reaalllly mean." "Was I not good enough?" he asked. "And THERE it is. I'm sure you were a perfectly fine baby. You're cute enough anyway." "Oh stop," he waved. "Nah, I'd have loved to see it! You'd have been so cute to take care of!" she pinched his cheek. The room in front of them looked nothing like it did before Jack moved out. Before, it had been a plain, simply spare bedroom. A single queen bed, a night stand with a lamp, and an empty set of drawers. That was before his parents decide they wanted another baby. Now, along with the spare bed, there was an crib, diaper changing table, and a box piled high with toys. They were planning on re-painting the walls as well, but said they would wait until they found out the gender of the baby, a position Jack had held himself back from commenting on. The room now served two functions- a bedroom waiting for any adults to visit, and a nursery waiting for a baby to be born. "Its also, I don't know..." Jack considered his words. "Premature. They don't even know if she's pregnant yet." "Yeah, kind of," Jill said, then shrugged. "So they got excited. They said they found a good deal on the stuff. Besides, don't you want a baby brother? I always thought it would be fun. Jack shuddered. "Ugh. You mean someone to cry all night, mewl and demand food, and crap themselves? No, I really don't want to experience that. I DREAD the day my parents ask me to babysit. I aint changing no poopy diapers!" "Haha double negative!" He only glared at her. "Oh come on, it wouldn't be that bad. I've actually been considering taking up babysitting as a part time job." Jack was shocked. "Really? Why? You WANT to do that? It seems to annoying and gross and exhausting." She waved a hand. "Nah, it can't be that bad. Really even changing diapers wouldn't be terrible. I just need someone to practice with. You know, figure it out in a safe environment where I won't hurt the baby." "No. Just... no. You can have fun with that if you want. If I ever have kids, it won't be for a LOONNGG while." Jill shrugged. "Alright, suit yourself." They paused for a moment and looked around the nursery. Each imagined a baby crawling around it, and each forming a completely different opinion of how it would feel. "So what was it you wanted to show me?" Jack asked. "RIGHT. Come here, I have something for you." she walked to the bed, grabbed the bright pink suit case she had brought, and opened it up. She ruffled through piles of clothes and underwear, throwing them onto the bed. Jack reached down and grabbed an escaped pair of pink panties. "Hmmm hot. I hope this wasn't the thing "for me," unless you are planning on wearing them. I mean I'm game if you want to try, but that isn't my thing." She raised her eyebrows. "Really?" "I'm just saying I love all your skimpy underwear but I think they would look better on your butt then mine." She scoffed and grabbed them. "That isn't what I wanted to show you." He faked a pout. "Aww no? I was getting excited now." "Wh.." "So I DON"T get to see you in underwear? Or do you have some for me to try on?" "You'll see me in my underwear a LOT, ok, just not now you horny dick. THIS is what I wanted to show you!" she brought out a box. It was white, with a red and black hypnosis wheel drawn on it. "Practical Low-cost Objective-Based Technology Presents-The Instant Hypnotizer!" She read. "Huh..." he looked at it carefully. "You want to try hypnosis?" "Uh huh," she replied. "Just got it, and I figured it would be a fun game to try. Come on, lets turn it on!" she opened the box and took out a large wheel with a handle and trigger. "It says it comes with a battery, and can be charged in the wall when it dies. Its supposed to be able to hypnotize people in seconds! "Mhmm.... I mean... that sounds a bit dangerous. Do you really know what you are doing?" She shrugged. "Ah, what's the worse that could happen?" "I don't know! I just would think we should look this up first, or have someone whose done it before, or something like that. Does it have an instruction booklet." She looked in the box. "Oh yes, yes, here are the instructions. Ahem." She pointed a finger on the side of the cardboard. "It says, 'Jack, stop being such a pussy. Play this game with your girlfriend, and you might get lucky tonight.' Ah, wise advice." Jack quickly went from unimpressed to smiling. "Ah! Sounds great." She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, all guys are the same. Alright, what should we do first?" "I don't know, pick something. Just do it quickly, I'm getting excited." "Riiiiggghhttt..." she reached to the machine and started to turn a dial. "And by "excited," you mean your dick is excited, right? Alright, lets see..." She pointed it at him. "Ready?" "Ready," he smiled. She clicked a button, and it began to whirl. Lights flashed, and a low buzzing sound filled the air. Jack's eyes went wide and focused on the center of it. When it stopped, he was left motionless, eyes blank, mouth open and drooling. Jill chuckled. "Alright. When I snap my fingers, you are going to act like you're a little baby and I'm your mommy until it wears off." She snapped her fingers. "Goo," Jack said. He fell backwards and sat flat on the ground. "Goo." Jill put her hands on the side of her face and began to laugh. "Oh. My. God. Did this actually work? Jack, can you hear me?" He looked up at her. "Awo?" he asked. "Oh my god, it really did work! And what gets you out?" She snapped her fingers in his face. "MMMPA!" he said at the fingers, and began sucking on them. She laughed. "Alright, so it isn't' that. She lifted the box. "Instant hypnosis. If no signal is established during opening moments, will run out in preset times depending on the setting. All right! Looks like I'm your babysitter until it wears out! Ready to be my baby!" "Awogala!" "HMMM I never liked the taste of arugula, no matter how healthy they say it is. What else you got?" "UUMA!" he replied, raising his hands for a hug. She knelt down. "Awww, of course I'll hug my baby. What a good boy, mommies here!" She hugged him. After a moment, she let go. "Waaa?" He asked, sounding upset, and clung tight. He pulled her down closer. "Its ok baby boy, mommies just, ooff you're strong," she tried to push off one of his arms but couldn't. She reached around and patted his back. "There there baby boy, mommy will be back in a moment, just... Offf... WHY ARE YOU SO STRONG?" "Cooo, coo," he lectured her as he hugged her. She tried to stand up against what she now realized was a full adults strength coupled with an infants mentality. The two together were NOT a good combination. She managed to undo one of his arms. "WAAAHHH!" he immediately began screaming. "OK OK OK OK," she said, and hugged him again. The screaming stopped. "Just, please don't pinch me like that. OW! I said STOP PINCHING! Let me just, hmmm..." she looked around the room. The bed would be no help in his current mindset, and neither would any of her electronics. However, in the corner was a toy box. She reasoned that if she could make it there, she could find something to distract her now baby-brained boyfriend. She took a step, but found he was still holding tight, and hard to move. "Want a toy?" she asked. "Awwoo!" he smiled in agreement. "Good baby. Then we just gotta go over there, alright?" she pointed toward the toy box. "UHHH!" he laughed. She began to move toward it but couldn't. To her dismay, she realized that he expected her to carry him. She sighed, and reached down. She had commented earlier that it must be hard for him to lift her. However, it was FAR more difficult to do the same to him. He sat in confusion as she struggled to pick him up, swung him a few inches to the left, and dropped him again, panting. She moved, reached down, and repeated the process. It was a long, slow job, but finally she made it. She grabbed a teddy bear and handed it to him, and his arms instantly released her to cling to it. He leaned back on the ground and rolled around, gurgling in joy with his new toy. "Alright, well that was a bit cold. No no, don't worry, I don't mind that you clearly like the teddy bear more then me." He looked at her. "Za?" he said, and reached a single hand. "No no no no," she pointed at the bear. "Play with him! Play with him!" He turned his attention back to the toy. She sighed and ruffled his hair. "Alright, I don't know how long this is going to last, but I might as well get my practice in." she said. She walked back to her bags and reached in. "Well, you WERE interested in the underwear I brought and DID say you were willing to wear some of it if I wanted you to, and I do want you to wear these." She laughed. "Of course, its not like you could have guessed I brought them, but I don't think you can mind that now." The package she brought out was made with clear plastic. Inside were a dozen adult diapers. Like most adult diapers they were white, but unlike most they had friendly looking savanna animals on them. "Safari," they were called, and she was glad she had found them online. She had gone back and forth between trying to buy a store brand and ordering online before deciding the latter was less embarrassing, and was glad she did. "Come on baby boy! Lets get your diapie on!" she said. She walked down to him and bent over to undo his pants. She laughed. "Since your such a baby now we probably should before you have an accident." She paused. She realized that it could be a very real possibility, depending on how long the hypnosis lasted. She looked at her fully grown adult boyfriend, rolling around mindlessly on the ground like a baby, unaware of anything except his teddy bear. She had heard what it was like to change a real baby's diaper, how they often tried to crawl away, or went more half way through. She remembered the strength he had displayed when he clung to her. With a fully grown adult who was convinced he was a baby, changing a diaper would be FAR more difficult. She shrugged. That was a problem for later, and if anything it would still be the practice she wanted. She finished undoing his pants. "Ok sweetie, lets get these off so we can put on your diaper." She laughed again. "Oh boy, you are going to FREAK when you snap out of it and see what you're wearing." She began to pull, and he began to kick playfully. At least, it was meant to be playful. She could tell from his smiling and giggling that he thought it was funny. However, it was one thing when a 20 pound baby kicked playfully. It was another thing entirely when a 180 pound adult did. "AWWOOO SHUSHAH FUU!" he said, kicking. "You trying to make me a secure password?" she said. She began to hold down his legs, but he struggled more and made more sounds. "Come on, bad baby! You gotta... hey... OW!" she said finally, leaning back and clutching her head. As soon as she got one of his feet out of a pant leg, his foot flew up and kicked her forehead. While it wasn't bleeding, it still stung. She glared down at him, and he smiled back at her, unaware of any problem. "Oshhaaa?" he asked, and giggled again.

Channel:CollegeHumor Title:The Baby of the Friend Group

Part of the new Deadpool 2 dvd Trailer. Deadpool 2 - _Baby Legs_ Video.mp4

Found on YouTube.

Kinda thought you'all may like it too.

Pampers Poo face commercial slow motion video the Moment of .... well

I hadn't seen this posted here before but thought it was funny and wanted to share:

Let's flex that funny bone!

Complete one of these 2 sentences: Diapers are ... A diaper is ...

Okay so on the latest Myth Busters Mail Bag episode at the very end they replay an episode wherein they try to measure a girl's (Tori's) flatulence. Then they "design" a pair of plastic pants with both sound and "gas" detectors to let everyone know when the "event" happened. Not necessarily related to diapers but definitely a testament that wearing plastic pants helps keep the stink out. Not sure when it aired. -dw

Lost $250 yesterday, got a hundred of it back today. Holding for the long-term... but this cracked me up: " width="610" height="343" frameborder="0" webkitallowfullscreen allowfullscreen>