ThomasInWVa

Normal routine: 1st diaper before work. 2nd at lunch. 3rd after work. 4th before bed. If the night diaper is saturated, I'll add a diaper before the work diaper. (For the Gym.) Betterdry Large from Northshore.

Much ado about nothing. In the last 10 years, this hasn't been an issue and I've flown a lot. The "brief" idea wasn't very workable. I just wear a normal disposable. Never had an extensive pat down. Only had my carry-on searched once. No big deal with the stack of adult diapers. I usually change to a fresh diaper just before boarding. This gives me 8-12 hours in case we sit on the tarmac. Going thru the scanners with a wet, even saturated diaper, doesn't cause any red flags.

The best I have found are Better Dry. I get mine from Northshorecare.com. They also offer a subscription service. I get a case every 2 weeks.

I've been with my current employer for over 6 years and no one knows I'm wearing a diaper. As I'm using high quality disposables and change at lunch, there are no odors or leaks. If I know I cannot change at lunch, I'll wear plastic pants and can go 8-10 hours and know I wont have a leak. Modern adult diapers are so well made, I don't worry about skin issue and can easily go 8 hours with no concern. Unlike years ago when all options were limited. Cloth is absolutely the worst to wear and will lead to all sorts of skin issues and comfort was impossible. At this point, diapers are so old-hat, they are a non issue. At some level, I hope people joke about adult diapers at work. I'd be dialing my lawyer immediately.

Yea, cost is a big barrier. Most doctors I've dealt with ignore the diapers and incontinence. Nursing staff suggest hospital diapers but were ok with me using mine. We're very happy to let me handle my own changes. Most medical staff dismiss it. One CNA mentioned that most on the ward don't wear underwear and all beds have many pads on them, not just mine.

Seems my question didn't come across the way I intended. I'm pretty much only on the incon boards. They seem to be filled with AB/DLs looking for a "reason" to be allowed to wear/use diapers. As though they need permission. I'm asking, why not just go ahead? No one really needs permission. Honesty, it did occur to me that there were ab/dls that didn't want to be 24/7. It actually makes a lot of sense though.

What name appears on the credit card statement? And how secure are my real contact details? Thanks

I'm not a DL or AB. I wear diapers due to nerve damage. (And would stop if possible.) From my point of view, if it helps you feel better, less stressed, or happier, just accept it. Yes, it is strange to want to wear diapers or suck on a pacifier. But it's a LOT better than drugs, booze, or other self abuse. You will get no negative judgement from me. In fact, I'd think better of the obvious diapered AB than a drunk or stoner.

Let's turn things around a bit. All DLs and/or ABs, Why are you not wearing diapers 24/7? As someone who has to be 24/7, there isn't anything really stopping you. You don't have to tell anyone nor explain yourself. I don't understand the desire but its harmless. What actually bugs me a bit is the waffling and drama about attempting to find a way to sneak time in a diaper. If you are going to have a kink, jump in and make a commitment. ? Really though, if you actually tried 24/7, even in just for urinary use, I doubt many would last a full month. If I'm off base or you ARE a 24/7 DL, or even AB, please comment your story. (Seriously, a 24/7 AB, as strange as that is, would be fascinating.) But please, no fantasy stories.

Kingdark, I'm not sure what you mean. Just because something is prescribed doesn't mean it's free. Adult diapers are not on my prescription drug plan and if they were, they'd be crappy generics instead of top quality Better Dry. My income would easily disqualify me for Medicare. Besides, I don't do handouts. I'm not a fan of socialized health care at all. It's my health and my responsibility.

As Menaiya says. An HSA is a pre-tax savings account for healthcare costs. Not critical but no reason not to save money where possible. My issues are nerve damage in my back so I expect the urology appt to be more about documenting the changes. Cysto tests, volume & scope. And the "ekg" type test for nerve response. Not all are comfortable. It is amazing just how much a bladder can hold when filled. They say it doesn't "shrink", just loses tone and what you feel as "full" changes. In the past I had times where the sphincter would not release and I had to self-cath. Being unable to urinate is dangerous and I'm glad it is no longer an issue. Though I still have the cath kits just in case. After over 15 years, it just is. The only positive is that I can sleep very deeply as I don't get a full bladder signal at night. Though this could change quickly to a "always feeling full" feeling even when empty. - which is maddening.

So, back to being 100% urinary incontinent. Its been just over 2 weeks. Was on my longest streak of pretty good control for nearly a year. Some short lived control or urge issues. Thought things were improving. Had 2 nights of minor bed wetting. Then woke one morning complete loss of urinary control. No back issues. No muscle spams. Just nope. Urinary system decided I get no say in the matter. I've been here before. A while ago I thought it was permanent but things improved. And just as suddenly, back in diapers, back in the groove. Urology appointment in January. - That's the earliest I could get. Of course that wil be useless. I'm so over all the emotional bullshit. It just is what it is. I was enjoying having spare cash not having to buy so many cases of diapers. I was actually thinking about changing my HSA allocation. Glad I didn't. Nothing much else to say. At this point it isn't even an inconvenience anymore. Diapers are so good an comfortable, "accidents" are not an issue. Buy by they case. Diaper in the morning, noon, sometimes evening and before bed. Shower twice a day. Sometimes minor leak at night, no biggie. I see all the comments about how hard it is for the wannabes to wear diaper it is laughable. So much seriousness. It is quite funny actually. Your perspective certainly changes when you must wear them - for real and not some punishment fantasy. These days who really cares what your freak is? In some strange way, it helps to know that someone out there actually fantasizes about getting into my situation.

I've been urinary incontinent for over 15 years and I still often have "peeing" dreams and nightmares. If I immediately awaken I'm using wetting or have just wetted my diaper. I'm pretty sure that when I have these types of dreams, I'm actually wetting even if I don't awaken. These are not "i'm embarrassed dreams" but usually me just peeing, needing to pee, wetting as an incidental part of the dream, that sort of a thing. Odd that it is so common when I dream. Any other incontinent having wetting dreams?

Being on a keto diet ramps up the urine output in general for me. Except for the diet my urine output is the same over a day's time. What does change is frequency and intensity. I'm very conscious of my overall output as in the past I had problems urinating. The reverse of incontinence is the urinary sphincter was not relaxing. This used to happen a lot and I would have to self cath. Though I haven't had to for a number of years. Those muscles are not very strong anymore. But will will still have bladder flutters and spasms. When this happens I can expect times where I won't leak but till suddenly release heavily. Sometimes with bladder flutter sometimes without. When I'm leaking constantly, the flutters don't seem to have much of an effect. Diving or flying tends to hold urine in the bladder due to body position. It will usually release immediately when standing. Discomfort usually happens when I have a stiff erection the same time my bladder spasms or when the urethral opening is obstructed and a strong flow cannot escape quickly enough. Used to happen a lot in cloth diapers. Happens rarely now and usually only at night.

Tired condom an indwelling caths. My skin cannot tolerate the adhesive of the condom cath. The indwelling cath caused significant internal irritation. And with evidence of internal bladder damage I gladly stopped them. They are not very workable for an active lifestyle. I explored surgical options but they had too many severe risks and costs. I'm not happy about diapers but they are simple and work well. Never had a UTI with a diaper.

The toughest part of urinary incontinence is the cost. It is NOT trivial. The costs for diapers and pads adds up - a lot. My basic budget is now about $3,000 per year. I buy in bulk with discounts as much as possible. Diapers are BettryDry, Large, ordered by the case. I also order a supply of disposable underpads and some liners. The pad are not used very often. Mostly for travel or if I need to sit for awhile without wearing a diaper. About every 18 months or so I get a new set of large washable bed pads. And every couple of years a new mattress protector if needed. Oh, and though I don't wear them very often anymore, I also make sure I have 6 plastic pants. They are lasting about a year. I get baby wipes from the grocery store and they are not part of this budget. Fortunately, I'm able to use my Health Savings Account through work to help offset the cost by spending pre-tax dollars. Most think that you can't use HSA funds for "diapers" and that is true - you can't use HSA for baby diapers. But I've never had a any issues with adult incontinence products. We supplement our HSA fund by adding $150 into our account each pay period. (Bi-weekly). We are looking at the budget and will begin to increase our HSA setaside to at least $200 per week until we hit any caps. But that isn't just for incontinence, just taking advantage of using pre-tax income for medical expenses while we can. This costing is important not just for normal wear but we are looking at outfitting our cabin with a least a full year's worth of supplies. The wife was a tad surprised that we would be looking at about $3,000 for diapers and need room for 25 cases! It is a topic for another post but we are also looking at a supply of cloth diapers as well as the ability to make them if the needed. (That is getting a tad ambitious but the wife is pretty handy with a sewing machine. (Not sure how she'd do with a manual sewing machine.)

No. Not at all. Not in any way possible.

Its been about 8 or 9 years since I responded in this topic. Things have changed a lot. No more orgasmic contractions. Well very, very rare and very mild. Will still leak seminal fluid and/or ejaculate fluid at times but not as often. There is no sensation to this, just a sticky, mucus like discharge in stringy drops. Still occasionally have bladder fluttering but very mild and not often. Very random. Totally urinary incontinent. I can stop with muscle contracton but it will immediately resume when relaxed. The bladder sphincter has little muscle tonus. Very little sensation or knowledge of when I'm wetting. The bladder will sometimes hold some urine but its release will just happen. Bladder contractions are very mild if at all. When sleeping or depending on my body position, the bladder will hold urine. It hasn't "shrunk" - more of the opposite like bag that will fill and drain when moved. I really don't feel it when it empties. Sometimes I'll get the full or urgent feeling but its not real. With good disposables, I hardly ever know I'm wetting at all. Sitting tends to hold urine as does lying on my back or when I have a strong erection. But the moment I stand or start to lose the erection, I'll usually immediately start to leak. I no longer have a strong stream as the bladder isn't contracting. So its a lot of dripping, dribbles, or a weak stream. Anytime I move I'll leak or dribble. This is an improvement of sorts over the last 9 years. I always knew I'd become permanently urinary incontinent. Now I no longer have the discomfort and maddeningly distractions like before. In no way do Iike this though I've come to terms with the reality of it. I've learned to deal with it. The advace of adult diaper products has made all the difference. Interestingly, the real problem with skin issues was plastic pants. I seldom wear them now and my skin has never been better. Though I do have that rougher diaper skin that develop on the back on the legs.

If you may be on an IV, bring high-quality disposables like BetterDry. Hospital disposables are terrible and will easily leak. Incontinence when on an IV is like Niagara Falls. The hospital I was at would not allow plastic pants. Which makes senes as you will be changed or have to change much more frequently. And they will get urine in them anyway which will leak out when changing if not before so there will still be a pad and/or bedding change. It is much easier to sleep in a good diaper as they wont insist on a changing if you are ok and not leaking onto the pad. Cheap hospital diapers don't last much more than 2 hours before leaking. A saline IV really runs through you.

Cloth diapers, especially with plastic pants, are hell in the skin and prone to strong odors. BetterDry are the best diaper I've ever tried. Extremely comfortable and very high capacity. I've completely abandoned any idea of cloth diapers except for a long term disaster situation. (Assuming I have the ability to wash them. My kit has disposable as well but resupply is questionable.)

Ran into a very obvious AB/DL female at Walmart a few minutes ago. Before all you guys gush, hold on. She was short, pudgy, and had longish lanky hair. She looked to be in her young to mid 20s. Parents and little brothers were also fat. Her parents were quite fat. This Walmart is in a rural part of Virginia. She is the first person I've noticed there wearing a diaper who wasn't elderly. She was wearing dark sweat pant shorts over a heavy cloth diaper and large, thick plastic pants.. She had a pink t-shirt that was short enough to always see enough of the plastic pants. The plastic pants were high on her stomach and not only could they be easily seen and heard, but she had sweat stains on the shirt at that line. And food stains on the front. But to be fair, so did the entire family. She smelled of perspiration, pee, and that baby fragrance they put in some products. She had that certain waddle that you get with a thick diaper. Though her's was a bit exaggerated. The AB/DL was obvious as she had one of the large adult pacifiers on a plastic chain around here neck and she would often be sucking on it, then spitting it out and it would leave a trail of slobber on her shirt. When I saw this, I thought she might be developmentally challenged but she had regular conversations with the family and on her cell. She did spend time in the baby section by herself until one of her brothers came and got because they were checking out. Oh, the pink shirt was a knock off of a my little pony picture. I was certainly drawn to her for some reason but not enough to talk to her, just watch from a distance. I didn't want to be too much of a creeper. Yea, obviously I was but at my age, best not get into a situation that could be complicated. I think I'm a sucker for the emotionally vulnerable or something. Nothing sexual at all. Mayby just attracted to the strange.

Just feel like saying how much I appreciate how far adult diapers have advanced in the 15 years since I needed to use them. Couldn't do my usual noontime change today but I'm not the least bit concerned at all. I know I'll be ok well past quiting time. It is liberating not having to constantly worry about leaks and odor and I'm completely comfortable.

It seems that a good marriage does come down to communication. For some reason no amount of talk was able to get around the wall that had formed between us. We just couldn't get "close" to one another. There was always some thing unsaid between us. But that finally started to shift about a month ago. It basically took about a month of forced intimacy between us to get to the point where we could talk and really clear the air and vent our frustrations. And it wasn't just a one way street with me initiating sex. It seems that we both realized this is what we needed she reciprocated with an animalistic intensity. It took over 3 week of what I can only describe as communicating on a carnal wavelength, we were able to really talk. The real wall was just our mutual frustrations with life, work, each other, health, money, etc. I think we just needed to work out our frustrations before we could reach each other. Now our relationship is much less carnal and a lot more romantic and sensual. We are both feeling much better and as corny as it sounds, in love with one another. Oh, and the whole diaper & incentence thing isn't an issue. Apparently, it never has been on her part. It was all in my head. An no, it isn't any sort of turn on. It just isn't a negative or an issue. In her words, an inconvenience, not a problem

Betty, I was being a bit caviler with that phrase but I also firmly believe it. You can’t save to prosperity or limit anything into an abundance. The only way to have more is to produce more. I do recognize that this is not always easy and for some, it seems outright impossible. The ramp up to beginning to produce is too high for many. They are only able to look around and see nothing but insurmountable problems. And they are real problems. It takes an enormous amount of personal energy and positivity to overcome problems. And no, I’m not always Mr. Optimistic. Thankfully, I’m still able to pull myself out of a personal funk when needed. But the reality is that as we get older, the harder it will probably be. So the time to prepare is now. Financially, We’ve been preparing for my retirement (in about 15 years or so) for a long time. We should be ok. About 8 years ago we started to increase the amount we put away. I do expect to be able to reduce the cost for my incontinence supplies once I retire. It has been part of our fiscal planning as well as other possible health care costs. I do what I can to pull in extra income by consulting and programming as well as some self-directed investing. All of it is put towards the future. Once I realized I messed up on any legal recourse, I decided I needed to be very proactive for the future. Not much value in self pity or self loathing. I’m just not wired to be a victim which I’m very aware is a major advantage. I firmly believe in keeping things simple and not trying to keep up with the Jones’. Sure, I can currently afford high-speed Internet and it is a priority for my work. But we don’t do cable TV. And we have forgone yearly vacations and wanton spending. Simple cost effective clothes is better than spending needlessly. We can look professional without breaking the bank. We also use non-flashy cars. In other words, we live well but simply. I came from a lower middle class family that lived simply. My wife was super poor. She understands the value is not spending needlessly. She has very pragmatic tastes and fiscal sense. In many ways too much. It took a while to get her to realize that we can get quality instead of cheap when it matters. We both have relatives who don’t ascribe to the same values. Dozens of shoes never worn, going to clubs, spending on yet more useless degrees and inuring more debt, having to have some high-end car and clothes. Get-rich-quick-schemes, etc. In a few years it is going to get ugly. We firmly expect that once we reach retirement age that everything we expect will be upset. As the younger generation gets into a position of power, I expect them to plunder our retirement and savings and as socialism is pushed onto America the economy we will be in for a long, possibly a generation, of economic depression. I doubt we’ll live to see the end of it. I do not expect socialize medicine or medial care to be available. e have some land and a very modest “vacation” cabin in a part of West Virgina that will probably stay rural for centuries with no economic prospects of any kind. If needed be we could live there with a very modest income or savings - even in advance age. I’m keeping an eye on the social scene and if looks like things are going to shift, we plan to liquidate our holdings and see what happens. Basically it is a hedge against runaway inflation or the plunder of our retirement accounts.

Vary rarely do I change when at work but I have in a pinch. Otherwise it is very easy to do at Sheetz gas stations, Starbucks, or similar. Sure, I could go the entire work day with one diaper, it would probably be ok but I need to know for sure. And one diaper just isn't comfortable after 8-9 hours. I'd rater not have the be distracted by a wet or uncomfortable diaper. The cost is what it is and I don't know who else could or should pay for my needs. It is a lesson on having effective legal help BEFORE you needing it and knowing exactly what to do after even a minor accident. I assumed the insurance company would "handle it" but that wasn't the case. I also waited too long to talk to a good personal injury lawyer and found out that i should have established a better medical case from the beginning. I pay for my supplies from my HSA account so at least it is pre-tax money. While my income is low 6 figures, it sill is a chunk of change I'd rather use or invest elsewhere. What I've come to realize is that this is a cost burden I'll have to maintain for at least 20 more years. Even if my condition improves, and it has improved at times, its return is usually sudden and without warning. At home, I can chance it but not at work. If it became known I wore diapers it probably wouldn't be too big of a deal but wetting my pants is something else. Ageism is very, very real. Though it is less than what many people spend on coffee every day so I don't really worry about it. The solution to financial pressure is to make more income.