ThomasInWVa

Thanks. I checked it out.

Ok, I found this thread because I posted a question about this issue on the DL forum. But this isn't about that -for now. @Ferix I've read all your posts in this thread and I wonder why you haven't seem to try a "modified" foley cath? I'm incontinent. Been that way for about 20 years from an accident. There was a period where I could not release my bladder and had to have a number of emergency caths until I learned how to do that myself. The caths worked and it wasn't a constant thing so I didn't pursue any surgical solutions. But what I DID do was modify a Foley Cath to do what you want. Wearing a Foley is not comfortable. So I asked myself, what if it ended inside my urinary tract and just drained the last bit thru my penis? So that's what I worked on. It took a number of tries to get it right so that the cut end would retain the water in the balloon over a week and most important, the end of the tube would not irritate the urethrae. The trick was to get it to stay far enough inside not to move as much but just enough where I could push back enough to get to the tip and cut off the plug when it was time to remove it. This worked very well and for a period of about 5 months, I used an indwelling 5CC (10CC actually) Foley that I practically didn't feel except in very rare case. It was easy to completely forget I had it in. Oh and I heard you could get pretty much any surgery you want done in Puerto Rico. But I don't know if thats an urban legend or not. And about 15+ years ago one guy said he paid a veterinarian student a few hundred bucks to do the Botox treatment a number of times until the incontinence became permanent. Of course like most of these stories I'm pretty sure it was a fabrication. But then again who really knows? I suggest you find a way to fix your idea that you want to be incontinent. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. Aside from the hassle, I've spent well over $20K on diapers and supplies since the accident. Twenty thousand dollars literally PISSED away. If that was in my portfolio, it would be well over $250K.

First, this is a non-political post. Really. An idea/question started to bubble up a couple weeks ago with all the talk of gender affirming treatment and surgery for even young children. That's some pretty strong an permanent stuff. My question is that if such surgeries are being normalized, what about surgeries and treatments that would render someone temporary or permanently incontinent? Yeas ago when I had issue related to severe retention I found data on using botox to relax the bladder sphincter muscle. But it was only a research study and not an approved treatment. There was also a type of stent (Urolume?) under study could be permanently used to keep the urinary sphincter open. After a while my condition changed and bladder retention was no longer a problem and the idea was moot. But with the recent normalization of gender surgeries and overall acceptance of "unusual" lifestyles and normalization of what used to be private kinks, I'm wondering if surgeries to create incontinence for a more real AB experience would also be normalized. If this does become accepted, how much interest would there be in a temporary (as in 6-12 months) or permanent treatment or surgery to render someone urinary and/or bowel incontinent?

That would defeat the purpose of going nude. And I don't have any jockstraps. Never did like to wear them. I realize this is an AB/DL group so there may be more of an interest in staying in a diaper rather than getting out of one. Have having to wear diaper for about 20 years now, the idea of not having to wear is worth a shot. Not enough to try experimental spinal surgery of course! The compromise is that when I'm indoors I wearing a diaper or absorbent underwear or pad in regular underwear. When outside, I'm in the buff. Oh, except when I'm working or in the shop, at which point its the usual diaper regimen. But once I'm off and for weekends, We are mostly outdoors and nude.

As the title says, this didn't work out very well but not a complete failure. Backstory: My wife is from Hawaii and for years during the summer, she would wear only a sarong, this is just a cloth wrapped around the waist - similar to how you wrap a towel around your waist. Except that a sarong is usually a flower or Hawaiian style print. Yes, that means she would have her breasts exposed. Obviously this was inside the house in winter but also outside during summer. We live in a very rural area with no nearby neighbors. She grew up like this and its very normal for her and her family. Well a couple years ago, she just stopped wearing anything about the house and outside in the summer. Except sometimes, sandals. Anyway, she has often tried to get me to go nude as well but that just isn't something I could do being urinary incontinent. In the evening, outside I would - sometimes, but it wasn't very often. Well, I tried this for the last few weeks. It started a bit by accident. A sudden skin rash popped up and I decided to see if I could go without a diaper for a few days. My wife encouraged me to see if I could do it all summer. So we planned it out. She said she would clean up any drips on the floor. Indoor chairs were covered with pads. I started with a pad and towel on my office chair but that is not comfortable. A diaper will feel dry for hours, a pad immediately feels wet and stays that way. The same when putting a towel on it. Since my chair is just a mesh anyway, I tried nothing, just allowing urine to drain onto the concrete floor. My (new) home office is on an older enclosed porch area with a concrete floor. I moved out here in 2020. A few months ago, I noticed that there were a number of drains on the floor and a hose outlet. So when this experiment started, I made sure they worked, and changed the room around to get stuff off the floor so it could be hosed off. OK, so here I am, trying nude incontinence. Much was learned. For one, its not just a constant dribble. That is how it tends to happen when standing with some variability. But when I sit, I will drip a little at times but have quite large releases when I change position or just whenever. And this can be just a more moderate trickle that just flows out or a bit of a stronger stream / spray. The upshot is that my legs and feet will often get peed on. And once its on the floor, its a bit slippery and I'm constantly stepping in urine. The foot/urine problem was improved by wearing shower shoes during the day and putting down a towel as a floor mat before stepping into the kitchen. The wife was really good about constantly cleaning the floors of any wet spots throughout the day. She would also clean around my chair as I worked at times. I would hose down the area (very gently!) a couple times a day. Most evenings are spent outside. in many ways it was fun. Lots of fun marital activities. But the problem was that the porch area and other areas outside started to reek of strong urine. It takes a lot to clean that smell away and that can be worse. After a while it seems like you are working in a rest stop restroom - and in a way you are. Outside isn't much better. Any surface that gets urine on it must be scrubbed. Any grassy areas that get a lot will need t heavy hosing to dilute the odor as much as possible. I have never been so annoyed having incontinence in a very long while. So the nude incontinence in the house just doesn't work. When working inside, I'll be in diaper as usual. It feels a lot more comfortable for sure. But when mostly out door, I'll be ditching the diaper for a while.

Urge incontinence is sometimes worse than just not having control. I had this for many years and didn't realize how much stress built up from not admitting I genuinely needed diapers. Even the times when I had control there was always the knowledge that it WILL end with no warning. It took about 10 years to admit that I not only physically needed diapers to have a normal life, but that the stress was destroying my health and life. Coming to terms with the realization that I needed to wear diapers constantly and "just not worry" about wetting, was a major relief. Sure, I wish I didn't need them. Diapers suck - big time. But they allow me to live a normal, active life without worry about heavy leaks or being "that guy" who can't sit in on a hour long meeting without multiple breaks. That DOES impact your career. If you get up at night more than 1 time for a bathroom visit, wear diapers and once you have your first full night of restful sleep, you'll see the value of wearing diapers.

A number of times. I think I've commented about some before. It happens. No big deal. During urinary exams, there are lots of absorbent pads under you. And the prep is usually to put on the gown with you diaper still on. At some point before the exam, a tech will come in and have you lie back and they will remove your diaper and clean the area and put a new diaper under you and pull it up and lightly secure it. They are used to leaks and ignore it. Unless they need a sample, if they cath, the just let it empty into an absorbent pad directly. Whenever I'm on an IV, its like opening a drain. It just goes right through me. The thing is, they don't use caths or diapers unless you specifically request them. They would rather you just soak the bedding and let them know it needs to be changed. I usually bring my own high quality and put them on and change myself where possible. I've had some minor surgeries lately and I always wear a diaper in the prep area and sometimes it will stay on during surgery. Some times they remove it. Either way, I'm soaked by the time I come out of the anesthesia. If they took off the diaper, the bedding is soaked. If not the diaper is quite heavy. In either case, I'll change before leaving for the drive home. The rest of the day my urine output is very unpredictable. But usually that night is very, very heavy.

Short response. I eventually agreed to help out. Took a bit to learn how to breastfeed as an adult. It isn’t about just sucking a nipple. You need to milk th breast with you mouth buy gently, repeatedly squeezing the breast with your mouth while sucking a bit. Also, it sort of sprays out in all directions. Also pointed out to the wife that there was not reason she couldn’t also do it. Wife is forced to agree and also pitches in. Each breast feeding is about 1 cup (8oz or so) per tit but it can feels like more. The more you breastfeed, the quicker the breast re-fills. I had to throw in the towel when it went from 3 to 4 times a day to every 2-3 hours. Why did I stop? Turns out breastfeeding can be sexually stimulating for her. Since I often get up in the middle of the night for about 30 minutes to an hour, the plan was if Ruth wasn’t awake, to wake her and suckle at that time. Sometimes she would fall asleep while doing this. A couple of times when she was half or lightly asleep, she seemed to get aroused. I mentioned this to my wife so that night she took my place and came back highly embarrassed and said that she wasn’t “just aroused,” she was having intense multiple orgasms. My wife talked to her the next day and found out that she would often have orgasms this way. At this point I stopped “helping.” Though my wife still does at times. My wife has said its ok with her if I help and suggested that when we both suckled together, it would be less weird. But to me that wasn’t the case. Someone commented about her “figuring out I wear a diaper.” That's not a secret in the family. They all know about my injury and condition. Most have probably forgotten anyway as I never just walk around in a diaper. Its always covered and unless you know its there, you won’t. I did feel quite weird about starting it and what I haven’t told me wife is that I liked doing it and didn’t mind it. And I’ll confess here, I too would get aroused at times. Not towards the cousin, but in general and I liked that feeling. And my wife sure seems to like when I suckle her breasts now that I “know how.” – She is not lactating, so nothing is produced, she just likes how it feels. Still a bit weird about the whole thing. Ruth heads home next week. Hate to see her go but it will be nice to have the place to ourselves again.

Ok, I'm really out of my depth on this. Real advice needed. First, not an AB in any way. Urinary incontinent due to an injury for about 20 years. My wife's very close cousin arrived recently for an extended visit. She (the cousin) is a large woman, early 50's. As nice as can be and all that. Widower for many years. She an my wife grew up together and are as tight as sisters. As is the custom for people in Hawaii. The back story. Anyway, the cousin, I'll call her Ruth to make it easy, is a heavy set woman with large breasts. To say they were "full" breasts is an understatement. While she has never been pregnant nor had children, she has lactated since she was 13, heavily. She has been using a breast pump (pumping she calls it) a number of times a day. Sometimes every 3 or 4 hours. And she goes thru a lot of nursing pads daily. Now, I didn't really know any of this until yesterday. Its not like she is pumping in front of everyone or anything. I had no idea even though I've known her for about as long as I've known my wife. Ruth says she needs to pump or it gets painful and she'll even get a fever and other health problems. Here's where it gets crazy. Seems Ruth has more of a wild or freaky side than we realized. After her husband passed years ago. She has had gentlemen callers who've paid her to suckle at her breasts. Not an AB thing, just men who are into this thing. She even had regulars. No, she was never a wet nurse - seems they still exist but she has no interest in that. Oh, and Ruth wasn't a prostitute. No sexy stuff when on. All cloths were always on. I guess they were just beta's who got off on that sort of thing. OK, here's the freaky part. Ruth asked my wife, to ask me, if it would be ok if I would suckle at her breasts at least once a day. No, I didn't just jump into this. Though both women insist I do so. Seems that pumping doesn't help as much having someone actually breastfeed. She showed us what she has to go thru. It takes about 25-30 minutes to pump a breast but when someone suckles, it can only take about 15 minutes per breast and it last longer before she will leak or needs to pump again. Each breasts has over a cup of breast milk at a time. She said its a relief when her breasts are empty. She is healthy who doesn't smoke or take any drugs. Is this a real thing? She said that she can't get anyone else because of Covid. The idea makes me a bit queasy. Am I over thinking this and should do it ? Or is this as weird as I think it is? I've also heard that breast milk "goes right through you." I'm not interested in having the trots either. I know this is probably someone's wet dream on this forum. And I almost didn't post anything here because of that. On the strong chance that someone here has breastfed as an adult, what could I expect if I go thru with it?

Hit this sub forum by accident and this line caught my eye. It was accurate years ago but these days, good quality disposables can easily handle multiple "deluges" in an 8 hour period. I'm 24/7 due to actual incontinence. There are times when I'll retain urine and it can be released in a torrent. Diapers like BetterDry can handle this without much of a problem. The only time it may be an issue I've experienced is when lying on my back or sides at night. In those situations, a heavy torrent can leak a bit. But overall, modern disposables are very good at handling multiple heavy flows. This is by design as more older adults are not fully incontinent but have control issues. They will retain urine as usual but suddenly lose control at times. So modern adult diapers are made to handle this condition. Interestingly enough, they are best suited for often moderate releases rather than constant wetting. Constant wetting tends to saturate the absorbent material in a local area that leads to early clumping and breakup of the matting. Occasional moderate releases allow the urine to flow to unsaturated material before being absorbed. This allows the diaper to absorb across it s surface. So modern diapers like BetterDry work better when having moderate to heavy releases rather than a constant light drips. And they are designed to work best when sitting or standing. Even a male wetting in the front will often allow wetness to reach the back of the diaper over time.

Have you ever had an arm muscle that jumped on its own? It's like that but inside around where your bladder is. They can be slow or rapid, strong or weak. For me, it's mostly a lot of fluttering and a few larger single flutters. They rarely hurt but will often lead to more leakage if anything is in the bladder. They can cause pain if the bladder sphincter doesn't relax or open at the same time. Very similar to trying to force yourself to stop urination mid stream. (Exactly like that actually.) When I would have some control and my bladder would fill as usual, a sudden spasm would often result in an immediate expulsion of spurting urine depending on the strength of the contractions. This can be painful if the urine flow is blocked or impeded. Such as sitting or flow is restricted by a diaper. They can also be quite painful during an erection while the flow is restricted by the prostate. I tend to get them when my bladder starts to retain urine, usually when sitting, having a partial or full erection for a while (resulting in urine retention) or those damn hydrostatic tests. Or any foly cath that is 5cc or larger will cause them. That 5cc cath is hit or miss sometimes. But the larger ones will trigger them. They are usually not painful but extended fluttering is usually always accompanied by increased arousal, orgasmic contracts, possible ejaculation, and usually both a dull ache in the bladder area and a "blue balls" sensation for some time afterwards. In general they are nothing and are of zero concern to me. It has been years since they caused any pain. They happen basically randomly except as noted.

@Wheels The sexual issues are a result of the back issues that caused my urinary incontinence almost 20 years ago. For many years, they were frequent and persistent. But about 7ish years ago, they gradually stopped happening so much. Usually only happening at night before falling asleep or as a wet dream at night. Yea, they sound fun and at times were very pleasurable. But it can be very distracting, annoying, and frustrating. The the orgasm swarms don't usually cause ejaculation or a sexual release. Usually they just cause a frustratingly high state of arousal. When that aroused, it is challenging to get an erection or ejaculation. It is a sort of fatigue or over stimulation from what I was told. When this first occurred, I would heavily leak seminal fluid and have many small ejaculations. I was told that T-therapy could impact sexual function and asked about this. They weren't sure as this medical team is new to my issues. To be fair, my first urology team didn't believe it until I was getting an exam and saw it directly - feet in stirrups, foley cath in place, and just thin constant stream of seminal fluid slowly making a mess with occasional tiny ejaculations. The intensity has mellowed a bit for the last week, its mostly been orgasms before falling asleep or waking up while having an orgasm like a wet dream. (Though there may not be an ejaculation.) This whole thing is nerve trauma from an auto accident. Pain is very rare so I'm not interested in spinal surgery. Aside from the sexual and urinary issues, the back problem hasn't gotten worse. So I consider diapers and minor sexual disfunction a win compared to the original prognosis of degenerative nerve damage resulting in paralysis or intense pain.

For the last couple of months, I've been taking testosterone supplements due to age related low-t. Not unusual for my age. Overall, I've noticed the change and improvement in energy and vitality. Sexual arousal has improved a bit. Feeling better overall. But today, my old sexual issues returned and made up for lost time. Sure, a bit more aroused this morning after starting work (WFH). No big deal. Some off an on erections, that was a new as I've haven't had that sort of thing happen out of the blue in a number of years. Not a problem but the guys may know how it is when you have an erection wearing a diaper. Adjustments are required. All that wasn't a big deal until the this afternoon when the orgasm swarms started again. These are sudden orgasmic contractions that vary in intensity, number and frequency. Some mild and just a few to some quite forcefull, and in a large quantity. In the past they would be associated with leakage of seminal fluid and/or ejaculations. This afternoon, there were a few incidents on mild contractions and a heightened arousal. Just a few seconds of contractions. Nothing to even think about. Until a couple hours ago. I'm working when I start to lose mental focus as a general arousal feeling starts. It increases and few mild to medium contractions flutter a bit. Then about 30 seconds latter, a swarm of contractions suddenly starts and just keeps going and going getting stronger and deeper. After about a minute I can feel a deep orgasm building. It takes about 2 minutes until I have a powerful orgasm and ejaculation. The contractions don't stop though. Within about 5 minutes or so I have another deep orgasm and ejaculation. All without an erection. The orgasmic flutters abate a bit but haven't stopped. About 45 minutes ago a slow and deep orgasm happened. this one had a very strong erection so much so that I had to rip off the diaper while it all played out I can't even really focus on this post at the moment. This really feel good today but I know it can't continue like this. This is freaking nuts.

Yes, this was an issue between my wife and I many years ago but she eventually got over it. It will depend on the person of course. It came up in our counseling sessions. Time and familiarity may help. It took about 8 months before my wife was no longer bother by it. It happened by accident or passion depending on how you look at it. Of course that incident was after 8 months of bed wetting, leaks, diapers, catheters, etc. My wife has always been a large woman and she (and I) enjoyed mutual oral sex as a (the) main part of our sexual activity. Our custom being the usual "69" configuration with her on top. She liked having me in her mouth while I orally took her to multiple orgasms. The idea of me "leaking" in her mouth or in that general area - as she would often lay her face on my leg or pubic area, was a problem for her. The counselor would often point out that urine was sterile and she should not worry. But she couldn't get over it. She tried may times but just couldn't face it until one day I thought it was funny and chuckled. She was really offended and said that I wouldn't feel the same way if the shoe was on the other foot. I actually laughed and she got quite mad until I told her something like "believe me, I've worn that shoe many times." She was puzzled until I explained what I thought she already knew - she often leaked urine during her orgasms. Many times, not just leaked, but sprayed. She had no idea. She actually thought she was just "really wet down" there a lot. Well, she was -very much so, but often it was also a lot of urine. She was utterly mortified. So the next time we were that intimate, she didn't back off - and tired to tough it out. It didn't work, she was still too grossed out. This put a serious damper on our intimate relations for over a month until one night she had a bit more wine than usual at a social function and was quite randy when we got home. We immediately got to it. She was in rare form in that she was very aroused and practically begging to have an orgasm. - Scratch that, she was begging. (It had been over a month for both of us.) And every touch was driving her nuts. And it was driving me crazy too because she wasn't touching me at all I was a stiff as concrete and being completely ignored. It made me work her until she was frantic. I had to have been working her for over 20 minutes, letting her get close but not cresting. I'm almost at the point of ejaculating without even being touched when she begins head toward orgasm and suddenly takes me into her mouth like she used too. I came nearly instantly. It was fantastic but she was just about there and she kept working me as usual. In the past she would usually keep me in her mouth as my erection was lost. After a while it would return and she'd go for round two. Basically her attention wasn't really on me at all. She just really got off when I came in her mouth. That was the final stimulation she needed. And just as she started to orgasm, I no longer had an erection that was closing off my bladder. It started to empty as usual, a slow continual flow. But while she orgasmed. She completely didn't notice at all. She just kept working my penis as she moaned, spasmed and orgasmed for the next 5 minutes or so. (If she leaked, it was minor and not very noticeable.) My bladder completely emptied before she finished. Some she must have swallowed. But overall it was everywhere. Her face was in it, her hair, the bed was soaked. Semen and urine was all over her. She just lay there with my penis on her cheek just panting for a couple minutes before she realized what happened. After that things improved. It took her a while to consciously not worry about. But we were back to having oral sex and she wasn't grossed out if she realized urine was involved after the fact. Note, urine is not a "turn on" for either of us. She has just learned to deal with it. And over the years, her own bladder control during orgasm has weakened as well. I don't really care as I have over things on my mind at the time. A couple of pointers. Odor can be an issue. Make sure you shower well be for intimate relations. That will help. Also, check your diet. Some foods can cause urine to have an odor or taste. Best to avoid those foods. And for the record, you CAN have sex and oral sex with a foley cath if you take it easy and have a willing partner.

@Anonymous12 Years ago when I had bladder retention issues I faced the same problem. My doctor suggested I number of tricks to help my bladder empty. The 2 that worked for me was a low frequency vibrator (and actual massager on the very low setting) at the base of my abdomen just over the bladder. Note: there is nothing sexual about this. It helped to loosen the bladder muscles. The other was to pick one nipple and tease or stimulate it whenever I felt the urge to urinate and while urinating, especially at the start of urination. The idea being that this sensation would be a trigger to empty the bladder. Both work well but using a massager isn't very easy to do throughout the day and was only used briefly. But the nipple stimulation worked very well and I still use it over 15 years latter. For me, its only the left nipple. Touching the right does nothing. Again, this isn't sexual, the bladder relaxes and opens up very quickly allowing the bladder to drain. This works even with an erection, which usually fads quickly. Its important to note that I will often still stimulate the nipple when I feel an urge to urinate and as I do so to keep the training pattern in place. Even these days when I don't usually feel an urge to urinate, when stimulating the nipple, I will get an urge and my bladder will relax if there is any tension in it. This also helps to get rid of an annoying erection if it occurs at an inconvenient time. To use the massager, place it at the top of the pubic area and don't move it. just let it massage the area for a few minutes. When starting you go for 5 minutes max 1 time per day then increase the number of time until ever 2 hours but no more than 5 minutes. After about a week, also do up to 10 minutes before bed when you can lie on your back when very relaxed. If you have a variable speed massager, you can make small changes to the rhythm that relaxes the bladder the best. It may only take 10 days or so for this to pay off and your bladder will immediately relax and release once you place the massager. This also helps if you have bladder spasms. To stimulate the nipple, chose one and stick with it. I'm right handed to it was easier with the left nipple. Just lightly touch or stimulate it, maybe a very light squeeze. It may feel somewhat arousing at first but as you do it when you feel the urge to urinate and while urinating, any sexual stimulation will stop happening. It is best to do this every time you have an urge and continue as you urinate. After about 7-10 days this started to work well with me. After 15+ years, it is automatic. This method works very well at night if you awaken and need to make sure you bladder empties fully. (Obviously this is best for diaper wearers.) It is such a habit with me now, that my wife says I will touch my nipple at times while I sleep. Hope this helps. Postscript - I though this data came from my urologist as I remember them both of them described in 2 pamphlets. I've long since lost them. But I now realize they were from a holistic medical doctor I was seeing at the time. They were for men as all the drawings were of male bodies. I guess there were different techniques for women.

I certainly agree to this statement. When I first realized AB/DLs were a real thing, I had some pretty negative views about it and the people who were part of if. But over time, I see it as very benign. And I've learned a lot of information about adult diapers that was available no where else. This was a big help in figuring out what worked and what didn't. I'm sure I saved a lot of money and avoided a lot of stress and problems along the way. I've learned to be very tolerant of other people's view here. Who am I to judge someone if they want to use diapers? Even if I wasn't incontinent and had to wear a diaper or an invasive and painful catheter? Or if someone wanted to have purple hair? What harm or problem was it? In some cases, being different is just someone's idea of creativity. The AB/DL lifestyle while much different than my own, is just a form of play that some people enjoy. The fact that they have a form of play they can do all the time is very interesting. I'd even say that having such an attitude is a very positive way to approach life. And millions of time more healthy, cheaper, and safer than drugs.

24/7 due to urinary incontinence. I shower a minimum of twice a day. Morning and night. During hot days or when I sweat a lot, I'll shower in the evening as well.

I think the people I'm seeing are not your usual AB/DL types. I don't think they see it as a fetish or roleplay situation. From an outsider's point of view, let me explain. (I'm not an AB or DL.) An AB may age or role play and would have adult sized but child-like bottles, big safety pins on exaggerated diapers. A DL gets a kick out of wearing and using diapers or having leaks. Whereas the older guy using formula used a bottle for feeding small animals like a calf or deer. A larger bottle with a bigger and longer nipple. It was about being able to actually suck baby formula or just suckle the larger nipple. The older women comfort wetting used absorbent pads and not diapers. I don't think these people would be the type to seek out an internet group. It was all very personal and private. In these cases, it is some sort of private coping mechanism or escape from reality. I don't see anything even remotely sexual either. In 2 decades of volunteering, I've only come across 1, perhaps 2, actual obvious AB/DLs, 1 group of furries (living together), and only a handful in an LBGTQ+ category. But incidents of this new infantilism, is much, much higher than anything else. I thought it might be my confirmation bias but once I brought it up, others agree.

Thank you. I recommend volunteering it to everyone, it does make a difference. And it also changes you as a person. I'm able to connect to people much better than before I was a volunteer. I think that it one reason people are likely to confide in me very personal and intimate details they wouldn't tell others.

@spark Of course I can't say for sure but I'm very good at creating trust and getting people to confide in me. Add the fact that I'm first involved during a period of physical, mental, emotional, and financial stress, its normal for me to connect very personally with people in a private setting. Most people tend to go out of their way to "confess" very personal and or intimate details about themselves. I belive it may be because I'm able to actually listen to the person themselves and easily establish a personal connection. One reason that I decided to post here is that a late 40s year old man who just lost his trailer in a flood and was living with his mother told me all about his "addiction" to baby formula and a bottle and would sometimes wet the bed. To look at him, you would never expect such a masculine man to have such a coping mechanism. Many times, older children can admit to me of bed wetting and other issues or poblems that they can't or won't admit to parents or gardians. When required, the appropriate social and legal agencies are contacted. (Only for important issues. Immigration or such status is not our concern.) The main reason I continue to volunteer is that so many people sometimes just need someone to listen and not judge them. Oh, I like your term of "comfort wetting." I'm going to mention that term with the other volunteers. It exactly describes it. - Thanks.

TLDR; Any else notice or are aware of an overall increase in AB/DL or infantilism in adults? I haven't publicized it on this group but I'm very active with a couple non-profits that deal directly with families in need due to events such as disasters, job issues, and other reasons. I end up doing a lot of in person consultations and discussions. Often helping with arranging temporary or new living arrangements, getting clothes, financial and other social help. Encountering adults who have diaper needs is not new. Since I'm also incontinent, I'm acutely aware of the challenges. While my employer and co-workers do not know of my incontinence and diaper use, those who I work with in my volunteer activities DO know I'm urinary incontinent and wear diapers. And I've been asked to assist in the area of adult diapers and incontinences issues as needed. Over the last couple of years, with a sharp incline over the last year to 18 months, I and others have noticed a sharp up tick in the numbers of adults as young as the mid 30s and up, to wear diapers and exhibit traits that could be called infantilism or regression. It is very strange with adults wearing diapers, or pull-ups, having "security blankets" or stuff animals and even pacifiers, bottles and drinking baby formula. No overt or "tv style" ABs but what seems to be adults who need these crutches as a coping mechanism. They seem to be across all economic demographics including college educated though most do seem to live with parents or other family. In addition, we have all noticed that youth bedwetting and has seemed to "last longer" with many more children aged 8-13 still wetting the bed and/or wearing nighttime pullups. In the past, it was very rare to find a child over 8 that wet the bed. But these days, it seems that most children we come across either still wet the bed or wear pull ups at 11. With a significant amount even until 13 and older. This seems to be a known fact as pull-ups are now available in larger sizes for older bedwetters. We have also had reports of young school-age children, up to Grade 2, still getting a bottle of baby formula at times. Especially in this area, I've notice the behavior of younger children to be "brattier" that I've noticed in the past. In families with babies, many older children up to pre-teens were still showing babyish tendencies of bed-wetting, pull-up or diaper use, having "accidents" and immature behavior. One more thing, an associate also pointed out that in the past, she notice how girls seemed to be "developing" as young as 10 and 11, she's now noticing the opposite where many girls at 16 and 17 that are barely starting to develop. And boys too see to be entering puberty later at 15 or 16. Word from grade school teachers is that pull up use is very common and the requirement that children being "potty trained" having been phased out. Though school staff will not change a diaper for non-disabled students. Of course the number of "disabled" (and mediated) students has also greatly risen. (I didn't even consider the possible link to pych meds.) [A 4th grade teacher said that all but a handful wear pullups and she has to put up with a classroom that reeks of urine at times.] This is completely un-scientific but I wasn't the first without our volunteer community to notice this. But once I started to look, it was easy to see just how common this is. Of course everyone seems to have a theory. I have no idea what the deal is. I have also notice the children overall have terrible diets of mostly sugar, carbohydrates and chemicals. The adults in these cases also have a similar diet and low activity level. Oh, childhood diabetes seems to be on the rise. They are certainly fattier and chubbier. Just tossing this out. I don't know what this means if anything.

This is real. It took me years to realize that wearing diapers also lowered my general anxiety and stress level. The constant worry about leaking or having a sudden bladder release slowly increased my stress level. Once I came to terms with the fact that wearing diaper was something I did need and that there was not point in trying to fight it, I became much calmer. I'm not a DL and don't "like" wearing diapers but I also don't dislike them. They just are. As my condition deteriorated over the years, "fighting" the need to wear diapers was a problem I didn't know I had. It took nearly 20 years to really realize and accept that I should be wearing diapers all the time.

Use a small vibrator. Do it often enough you may not even get an erection before you cum. I'll have a very deep and usually quite satisfying orgasm in less than a minute. Usually no erection at all. Very pleasurable, quick, and easy.

@toejamer I looked it up. Don't think it applies much. I don't do any fast or processed food. Eat very simple and clean. Organic meat, organic vegetables. That's it. No soft drinks. No drugs except coffee.

I'm going nuts these days with these super strong sexual urges. But they are not for actual sex. I'm now completely incontinent, no control anymore. This finally happened just before Easter. At the same time, sexual issues also started. The inability to get an erection but also a very heightened desire for sexual release. I've been here before with my back injury before but this very different. Be ready for the weird. First: I find myself wanting to just "hump thrust" by myself. Basically get on all fours and thrust my hips as if I was having sex. But not actually having sex or any sexual contact. just the very dynamic thrusting. I don't usually have any erection. (In fact, I don't think there has been any erections with this.) There this strong urge to thrust and in a bit I'll get this deep pleasure feeing building in my groin and finally ejaculate. It is very pleasurable and a much deeper orgasm than sex has been for awhile. Second: The desire to "hump" my wife. Note, this is not sex. But a strong urge to just hold her from behind and thrust into her until I climax. (To be REALLY strange, I've had this feeling strongly with others including men but its not something I'll act on.) And to get weirder, it isn't about being naked or clothed. Many times, I'll be fully clothed and wearing a diaper as usual. Sometimes I must be completely naked. Sometime, only my pants and diaper are down. Its not a "decision" but a "need", an intense urge. And with my wife, it doesn't matter if she is naked or not. There is no urge or interest if she is one way or another. Just that we will be standing, me holding her from behind. Even if we were both naked, actual sex wouldn't be possible. Its not about physical sensation. Not only do I not have an erection, but little guy is always sunken and barely visible. I really can't properly describe the intensity of these urges. Once they hit, I pretty much can't concentrate until I act on them. - Even if they occur when trying to have normal sex. After the injury, I've had intense sexual issues before such as spontaneous ejaculation and orgasms as well as dry orgasms. These happened every so often but would stop after a few months and have hardly happened in years. But this new weirdness is certainly strange. For over the last week, I've been hit buy the urge at least once a day, sometime more. I don't expect anyone to understand or to weigh in. I just needed to vent to someone.