2011

Chapter 33: The afternoon nap lasted longer than either of them expected.   The combination of swimming, traveling, mountain air, and emotional excitement from the past few days had completely drained Chris’s energy. By the time he finally stirred awake, the golden evening light spilling through the hotel curtains had shifted toward deep orange.   Bill looked up immediately from the chair near the window where he’d been quietly scrolling through photos from the trip.   “There he is,” he said softly.   Chris blinked sleepily from beneath the blankets, hair sticking up wildly from the nap while Elvis remained trapped beneath one arm.   For a moment he just looked around in confusion.   Then he remembered where they were.   “New Mexico,” he mumbled sleepily.   Bill smiled warmly.   “Still here.”   Chris stretched dramatically beneath the blankets before suddenly freezing.   Then came the familiar expression.   Bill immediately recognized it.   “Oh?”   Chris gave a sheepish little nod.   “Need changing.”   Bill laughed softly under his breath.   “Thought so.”   The nap had apparently done some serious damage diaper-wise.   Chris waddled sleepily toward the bathroom while holding Elvis, still half asleep and entirely unbothered by the situation except for wanting to get comfortable again.   “You really committed to this nap,” Bill teased while gathering supplies.   Chris yawned hugely.   “Was sleepy.”   “That’s one word for it.”   The change itself turned into one of those soft sleepy routines they’d settled into naturally over the course of the trip.   Warm wipes. Gentle teasing. Sleepy cuddles afterward.   Chris leaned heavily against Bill the entire time while the hotel room remained quiet except for the hum of air conditioning and distant sounds drifting in from outside.   Once everything was cleaned up and fresh again, Chris climbed onto the bed and curled beside Bill.   His stomach growled loudly almost immediately.   Both of them paused.   Then burst out laughing.   “Well,” Bill said, “I think somebody has opinions about dinner.”   Chris nodded seriously.   “Very hungry.”   Bill stretched slightly before glancing toward the window where the Santa Fe evening glowed beautifully beneath the mountains.   “So,” he said thoughtfully, “what sounds good tonight?”   Chris tilted his head.   “We should eat New Mexico food.”   Bill smiled immediately.   “That’s exactly what I was thinking.”   Soon they made their way downstairs toward the lobby where the concierge desk sat surrounded by warm lantern lighting and southwestern decor.   The concierge — an older woman with silver jewelry and a bright smile — looked up warmly as they approached.   “Well hello again,” she greeted.   Bill smiled.   “We need dinner recommendations.”   Chris added very seriously:   “Authentic.”   The woman laughed softly.   “Well then you came to the right city.”   She began listing several restaurants around Santa Fe before eventually pausing.   “But if you really want the full New Mexico experience…”   Bill immediately leaned forward slightly.   “Yes?”   “You should try Christmas-style burritos.”   Chris blinked.   “…Christmas?”   Bill looked equally confused.   The concierge smiled knowingly.   “In New Mexico, ‘Christmas’ means both red and green chile together.”   Chris gasped softly like this was magical information.   “Two sauces?”   “Exactly.”   Bill laughed.   “That actually sounds amazing.”   The concierge recommended a cozy local restaurant nearby known for its chile and handmade tortillas.   “Get the burritos,” she advised confidently. “Trust me.”   Chris looked up at Bill immediately.   “We HAVE to.”   Bill grinned.   “I think it’s legally required now.”   Back upstairs, the mood shifted into excited dinner preparation mode.   Fresh clothes. Cowboy boots again. Hair fixed. Pacifier clipped neatly.   Chris bounced slightly while getting ready.   “We’re eating Christmas burritos in NOT Christmas.”   “That’s New Mexico logic apparently.”   “I like New Mexico logic.”   Bill laughed while grabbing the diaper bag.   Soon they were ready to head back out into the Santa Fe evening together.   Outside, the mountain air felt cool and fresh compared to Texas. Adobe buildings glowed beneath strings of warm lights while the sunset painted the mountains in deep shades of orange and purple.   Chris reached for Bill’s hand automatically while they walked.   And as they headed toward dinner beneath the glowing New Mexico sky, Bill realized something quietly wonderful:   Somewhere along the road between Washington DC and Santa Fe…   This had stopped feeling like a vacation.   It felt like home.     Chapter 34: The restaurant the concierge recommended sat tucked along one of the glowing adobe-lined streets of Santa Fe.   Warm lanterns hung outside the entrance while the smell of roasted chile and fresh tortillas drifted through the cool evening air the second Bill and Chris stepped out of the SUV.   Chris immediately sniffed dramatically.   “It smells REALLY good.”   Bill laughed softly while adjusting the diaper bag on his shoulder.   “That’s usually a promising sign.”   He reached down automatically for Chris’s hand as they crossed the small parking lot together.   Chris’s slight waddle was noticeable to Bill now after the evening change earlier — not obvious enough for strangers to really notice, but enough that Bill could tell Chris felt extra padded tonight.   Chris didn’t seem to mind though.   If anything, he looked oddly comfortable.   The cowboy boots made soft thunking sounds against he sidewalk while Elvis remained tucked beneath his arm.   Inside, the restaurant felt warm and lively.   Strings of colorful lights stretched across the ceiling while southwestern artwork covered the walls. The sound of sizzling food and quiet conversation filled the air beneath soft Spanish guitar music playing somewhere nearby.   A hostess greeted them warmly before leading them toward a cozy booth near the back.   Chris slid into the booth first and immediately pulled out his crayons and coloring book from the diaper bag while Bill settled across from him.   “You came prepared,” Bill teased.   Chris looked serious.   “Restaurants are important coloring time.”   Bill nodded solemnly.   “Fair point.”   Soon Chris became completely absorbed in coloring a picture of dinosaurs wearing cowboy hats.   Bill glanced down at it and snorted softly.   “That’s either genius or deeply concerning.”   Chris grinned proudly.   “They’re western dinosaurs.”   The waitress arrived a moment later carrying menus and a bright smile.   “Well hey there folks. First time trying New Mexico chile?”   Bill laughed.   “Is it that obvious?”   “A little.”   Chris immediately looked up.   “We’re getting Christmas burritos.”   The waitress burst out laughing warmly.   “Well somebody’s already educated.”   After taking their drink order, Bill hesitated briefly before speaking gently.   “Actually… would it be possible to warm up one of his bottles with milk?”   Chris immediately grew shy beside him.   His hands slowed slightly on the coloring page while he avoided eye contact for a second.   Bill noticed instantly.   He reached across the table and squeezed Chris’s hand gently.   “It’s okay buddy.”   The waitress smiled kindly without even a hint of judgment.   “Absolutely honey, we can do that.”   Chris relaxed just a little after that.   Still nervous. Still shy.   But okay.   Once she walked away, Chris focused hard on coloring again while Bill quietly admired him across the booth.   The growth over this trip had been subtle but meaningful.   Chris still got embarrassed sometimes. Still worried about how strangers might react.   But little by little he was learning something important:   Safe people didn’t make him feel ashamed.   A few minutes later the waitress returned carrying the warmed bottle carefully.   “Here we go.”   Bill smiled gratefully.   “Thank you.”   Before handing it over, Bill gently tied a bib around Chris’s neck from the diaper bag.   Chris rolled his eyes dramatically.   “Daddyyyy.”   “You spilled an entire slushie today.”   “That was an isolated tragedy.”   Bill laughed.   “Mhm.”   Still, Chris accepted the bottle afterward with only a little lingering shyness.   He held it carefully while coloring with his free hand, Elvis propped beside him in the booth like moral support.   Honestly?   Bill thought he looked unbelievably sweet.   Then the food arrived.   And instantly both of them forgot literally everything else.   Huge burritos smothered in both red and green chile sauce filled the plates while the smell alone made Bill’s stomach growl.   Chris stared wide-eyed.   “That’s enormous.”   The waitress grinned.   “Welcome to New Mexico.”   The first bite completely changed both their lives.   Bill actually paused mid-chew.   “Oh my god.”   Chris blinked rapidly.   “That’s REALLY good.”   The chile had heat, but not overwhelming heat — warm, smoky, rich, comforting.   The red sauce carried deeper earthy spice while the green chile added brightness and kick.   “It’s spicy,” Chris announced after another bite.   “You okay?”   Chris nodded immediately.   “Good spicy.”   Soon both of them were fully committed to the meal.   And naturally… Chris became messy again.   Not Memphis BBQ messy. But definitely sauce-on-cheeks messy.   At one point Bill reached over with a napkin.   “How does it keep reaching your forehead?”   Chris shrugged.   “Burrito magic.”   Bill laughed so hard nearby diners smiled hearing it.   The whole dinner felt warm and easy in the best way possible: mountain-town atmosphere, good food, quiet laughter, Chris proudly showing off finished coloring pages between bites.   By the end both of them sat happily stuffed and sleepy in the booth.   “That,” Bill declared while leaning back, “might actually be the best burrito I’ve ever had.”   Chris nodded seriously.   “Christmas should happen every day.”   Bill snorted laughing.   When the waitress returned with the check, Bill quietly leaned slightly closer.   “One more question,” he whispered conspiratorially. “Best ice cream nearby?”   The waitress grinned instantly.   “Oh, absolutely. Go down two streets, take a left at the plaza, little shop with turquoise signs. Best homemade ice cream in Santa Fe.”   Bill smiled.   “You’re a hero.”   Chris blinked across the table.   “What?”   Bill stood and grabbed the diaper bag with a grin.   “One more stop before the hotel.”   Chris tilted his head curiously while Bill helped him from the booth.   “What stop?”   A dramatic pause.   Then:   “Ice cream.”   Chris gasped loudly enough that two nearby tables laughed.   “No WAY.”   Back outside beneath the cool Santa Fe night air, Bill helped Chris into his car seat while excitement practically radiated off him.   Elvis tucked beside him. Cowboy boots kicking happily. Bib still slightly crooked from dinner.   “You excited?” Bill teased while buckling him in.   Chris grinned so hard his cheeks hurt.   “This is the BEST road trip EVER.”

That was hilarious, although I think the reaction, if some dude did it, would be different from the one a cute girl gets. I, too, was irritated by the way it was fastened, and the product they chose in general - I get that they probably didn't want to go with an ABDL product, because that fast-forwards immediately to "this is a kink thing", but there are lots of decent white plastic diapers out there that don't have miles of flapping plastic hanging below them. It's funny, though, that so many of "us" noted that - I guess it's kind of like if you hang out with tailors, and all you comment on is how poorly-fitted everyone's suits are. We are the diaper fashionistas...

A couple of quick, further updates; I was over at my sister's place tonight. First of all, I wore a Tena ProSkin, because I'm still a little self-conscious about being in diapers around my sister, because I was in diapers around her, my first time 'round, and I don't know how much she remembers about how that wrapped up. My brother-in-law had a load of firewood dropped off, and I offered to help him move it and pile it, which meant loading it from the pile on the driveway, into wheelbarrows, walking it over to their shed, and then stacking it like, well, cordwood, in the shed. There was a lot of firewood. It was raining. I quickly regretted volunteering.  We got it done, and the Tena did a good job in not chaffing me as I walked back and forth for two hours - they did used to be my gym diapers, back when I went to the gym. However, what it did do, was this - almost complete structurally fail. I don't know if it was the dampness outside, the dampness inside, or the exertion, but I noted a concerning bunching around my butt as I walked back and forth, that I kept having to correct, when I was in the shed for a few moments, solo, by hauling the back of my diaper up - it really wanted to rest in the bottom of my jeans. At one point, I actually found it migrating down one of the legs of my jeans, so I quickly went into the house, "to use the washroom", and once I was in there, I had to haul the whole thing back up - it was in the process of turning inside-out, which is not good, when the inside consists of stuffing and SAP that has been peed in. It never actually leaked, to its credit, but I had to pull that tabs to places they've never reached before, to get it to stay on my hips. After we were done, I had to ask my wife for the car keys, so I could go get my (thankfully, nondescript) diaper bag, and conduct a refreshing of the derrière. My wife made no comment, nor did she ask what I needed from the car, thankfully.  I also got to hang out with my sister's grand-nieces from her husband's side, two girls, three and five. The five-year-old, as far as I know, is on the normal schedule, in terms of being self-sufficient in the potty department, but the three-year-old, like me, was in diapers. At one point, they went to get changed for bed, and then they came back out to say goodnight, and looking at the three-year-old, I had the thought that when I was wearing diapers to bed, as a kid, perhaps a lot more people knew about it, than I ever knew. That kid was in a modern product, some slimline SAP-lined miracle of modern toddler diaper engineering, and there was no question that it was there. I would have been wearing Pampers or equivalents, from the 1980's - surly, they were bulkier. It was an interesting thought road to go down, because back then, as I have detailed before, I lived in quaking fear of someone, anyone, outside of my family, finding out I still had to wear diapers at night - I was sure that would have been it for me, life over, the school would have had an assembly, to announce it, and perhaps there would have been ads on the TV. But I wore them around my own house, every night, I wore them at cousin's houses, sometimes I wore them in the car on the way home from cousin's houses, and I'd been sent out with the dog before, thusly clad, although I never went further than the boulevard - I was not walking around the neighbourhood with Pampers on, voluntarily.  I have almost no recollection of my pajamas from back then, except that when I was really little, they were mysteriously a little more formal - I have seen pictures of us when I was 5 and my brother was 2, and both of our pajama shirts had collars and buttoned up. But later, they were just the same things my kids wore, decades later - relatively light cotton pants and long or short-sleeved shirts with elasticized waists, exactly that the girls were wearing tonight, more or less. Hmmm.

Titanic

Sandy watched as kayla went through a mix of emotions looking like a toddler who was over due for a nap. Using mom like reaching, Sandy picks up the bunny pushing a paw to play different soothing music and puts it Kayla's lap. "Honey if you want to stop going there then you need to control your emotions. Thats all Dr. Joy is trying to help you with. And once ypu have your feelings back under control I'm sure your accidents will fall in line too. Now hold your bunny and remember the excersizes Dr. Joy taught you today." Sandy spoke calmly and compassionate but deep down she was wishing they were home already to put kayla down for a nap.