2011

116. Childish Thoughts Tess was soon getting carried away playing with her toys again. Spike knelt down on the floor beside her, and she showed him what she was playing with. She found herself coming up with stories about all the dolls; who they were, and how they felt about each other. She didn’t think about any of it in advance, but the more she said the more ideas she came up with, and she wanted to share all of them with her Daddy. She might have told him the same story more than once, or different stories about the same dolls. She wasn’t sure; she couldn’t remember that long. But she knew that she was having fun, and she didn’t think back far enough for any other options to cross her mind. But after a while, she started to feel tired. Like playing with these toys wasn’t as fun anymore, and she no longer felt so enthusiastic about playing. “You want something more fun?” he asked, and she nodded eagerly, all the life coming back into her expression. “How about we watch some cartoons, eh? Hop up here and I’ll show you one of my favourites from when I was as little as you.” Tess was excited by that. She wanted to learn more about what Spike liked, and she knew she would be happy doing anything, so long as they were doing it together. So she scrambled up onto the couch beside him, and rested her head on his chest. Spike worked the remote with one hand, while the other was stroking Tess’s hair, helping her to feel so comfortable and loved. And then the cartoon started. It wasn’t computer generated, which was a bit of a surprise. The animation looked like a collection of hand-drawn frames, like something out of the last century. And the voices all had local accents, so far as Tess could tell. Maybe not from this immediate area, but she was sure that it was a domestic production, and almost certainly from a company in the same region. That would explain why she hadn’t heard of it; Tess had been travelling all over the world with her parents, and she hadn’t been around here until the year before. She wouldn’t think about any of that until later; right now her thoughts were locked down to just simple things that a little kid might understand. But she found that she could just about think clearly enough to understand the dilemma of the green and pink cats on the screen. It was just a little bit of fun. She could enjoy watching it, without the need to overthink it. And she really liked feeling Spike’s hand; ever present and comforting. When she was able to analyse her emotions later, she would be surprised by just how good it felt to have that single touch. She didn’t need a kiss, or an embrace. All that mattered was the simple fact that he was there for her. Maybe she was starting to understand why all her friends were so hands-on when they were dating someone. She would be as happy to feel him stroking her hair, or holding her hand, or just sitting on a bench close enough to touch. Maybe just a subconscious reminder that this was real. And that feeling didn’t require any kind of adult thoughts to make it matter. The cartoon ended up including two short stories, which might have shared some kind of theme if Tess had been thinking hard enough to follow it, with a little segment in between where the snake was asking all the boys and girls out there to help him count some carrots. Tess wasn’t quite sure why a snake needed carrots, or how to count, but she did her best to help out when Spike asked whether she could do it. She wanted to show him what a big girl she could be, even when she was being little. She might not have been able to remember all the numbers, but as soon as the snake counted each one she was shouting it out right beside him, and she thought that was the next best thing. She only needed a tiny reminder, and then she could get the right answer almost all by herself. She cheered and clapped when Spike told her what a clever girl she was, and felt on top of the world for a moment. But as the story continued, she still couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. She did her best to ignore it, because she needed to have fun for her Daddy. That little discomfort was probably just because she was doing a new thing; nervous about things that didn’t even matter. At the end of the episode, Spike asked if she wanted to sing along with the music at the end. The words were on the screen, but Tess was struggling to read them even before Spike told her that she might find it difficult at her age. So he wound the video back a couple of times and taught her the words. It was fun to learn something together, and it was almost enough to banish the worries from Tess’s mind. And after she actually managed to get the words right, singing something about a princess and her pets, Spike went on to teach her what he thought the words were for a little while when he was a baby, before he learned to read the letters on the screen. Those words were very silly, and it sounded like young Spike had thought that the princess was turning into the pets, or the pets were going to grow up to be princesses. Tess thought that sounded fun, but just a little bit silly. She couldn’t say why it was silly, she was too young to think about things like that, but she could still giggle at how different Spike’s funny words were. As the second episode started playing, Tess found that she could remember a little bit of the words for the opening song too, and she did her best to sing along with that too. Even if that meant repeating the one line she remembered over and over, Daddy still loved her. He hugged her close, and gave her a little kiss on the top of her head. So why was she still thinking so much about things she wasn’t quite old enough to understand? As the show went on, she started to understand a little bit more. She could keep on enjoying it using only a tiny part of her mind, and call out excitedly whenever she saw Topaz the blue cat dance in the background. But inside her mind, there were plenty of brain points left over for Tess to think about how she was feeling now. How she could be having the time of her life, and yet still feel empty and unfulfilled. What was missing? She stopped thinking long enough to shout out the names of colours in response to the educational segment. She noticed that she was doing better than last time, and she felt even prouder of being such a big girl. But there was a little nagging doubt at the back of her mind that showing off what a clever girl she was didn’t really make any difference. It wasn’t like she was really learning, and answering the questions didn’t make any difference to anyone except the snake, who probably wasn’t even real. And that was the real sticking point. Tess loved the feeling of helping someone; of overcoming problems. That was what sparked joy for her; she could never enjoy something that came too easily. She’d realised that a while ago, and found that the understanding made it a lot easier to find moments of happiness. In the last year or so of school, she’d known that if she ever felt listless and unsatisfied, she should look for something that she could do to change the situation. Whether that was giving someone advice, or finding some new goal that would push her limits, she knew that it was the challenge that she needed; or the achievement. Where was the challenge here? That was the difference. When Gabby had tried to do everything for her, and tried to make her little enough that it was necessary, she’d quickly found that she no longer enjoyed the experience. She’d found ways around that: first analysing the way her own thoughts changed, and trying to understand the rules and limits of what hypnosis could do. Maybe even hoping that she could learn it to some degree. And after that, she’d used Ffrances’s regression to put herself in a position of responsibility again. If she was looking after a baby, even as a child caring for her baby sister, that satisfied the need to be doing something. Now she didn’t even have that. She’d told herself that this was different; that being with Spike and doing something that made him happy would make her happy too. And that playing the child role well so that he could enjoy it would satisfy her. But as much as she seemed to be enjoying herself, she started to realise that she wasn’t as happy as she could have been. She laughed and giggled, and she got excited. But those feelings were a part of the role that the hypnotic suggestions were making her play. Spike had told her to feel giddy and have fun, so she was doing her best to act accordingly. Even telling herself that she was having fun, when it wasn’t true. That was a very hard concept to grasp, especially for a girl so young. But by the end of the third episode of Pocket Cat, she thought she understood. She’d just been trying to convince herself that she was enjoying it, when all she felt was emptiness. And that wasn’t a good thing to think about. She didn’t want to disappoint Spike; she loved him. And she knew that she could keep on doing this if that was what she needed, just like she’d done to fulfil her obligation to Gabby. She just hoped there was a way she could satisfy him and actually get something she wanted at the same time. But that meant she needed to talk to him about what would work for her. She found herself wondering what she would do if he said that he wanted to take care of her completely, and he didn’t like her having responsibility. She didn’t think he would, but it was always a possibility. He wanted to be the one in charge, after all, but Tess couldn’t cope with not having any choices. She needed some stimulation for her mind. She would have to let him know about that, and see how far he was willing to compromise on his fantasies. But that was a conversation she would need to be a big girl for, and she wasn’t quite there yet. She’d wet herself again while she was singing, and there was no way she could claim to be big now. But maybe next time she would be able to prove it. She shook her head as another episode ended, and turned to look up at Spike. She really cared about him, she knew that. And she felt bad about drifting out of the littlespace he wanted when she’d started to get uncomfortable. But she still wanted to make sure this afternoon was as fun for him as it could be. So she promised herself that she would keep on playing the role of a little kid. She would allow herself to follow along with whatever childish thoughts and words came to mind for a little while. And then she would give an excuse to grow up; a reason to change back to a different age. And once she did that, she hoped that Spike would be willing to talk about limits. About compromise. He would be less aggressive than Gabby had been, she was sure, but it was also in his nature to put other people first, so it would be on Tess to make sure she didn’t ask too much. And just like that, the perfect conversation starter popped into her mind. She would ask to use the bathroom like a big girl. Even if he was making her wet herself, she was sure that if she asked to grow up a little, he would allow that. Maybe she’d have to let him change her diaper again first, but she was willing to go that far for the Daddy she cared about more than anyone else. He would let her grow up to change, and once she was an adult again, she was sure that he would be willing to have a reasonable conversation. The absolute worst case was that he would try to push her beyond her limits, like Gabby had, and then she would snap back to her adult mindset no matter what. There were some lines that even hypnosis wouldn’t make her cross; and while she hated the idea of disappointing him like that, she was sure there was zero chance of Spike Luger turning out not to be the caring guy he’d acted like ever since she moved to Raybridge. As the episode ended, he wanted to talk about the show again. He asked Tess about her favourite characters, and which stories she’d liked most. Maybe he was already thinking that it was time to grow up, and this conversation was a way to wrap up the session. Tess decided that she would keep on talking little for now, and if he didn’t suggest that it was time to be adults after a little chat, she could ask to grow up so she could use the potty. He would have got what he wanted, and she hoped he would be in a good mood enough to accept that she had her own desires.     Think it's going well? Is Spike a good Daddy? Do you think this conversation will go how Tess hoped?

Grocery run in the morning. I didn't see anything on sale, at least under the weekly deals, so I'm going to mildly splurge on a Home Run Inn pizza. I seemed to really like everything but the price.

Hi hi I'm transferring from ADISC cause I guess the forum was discontinued I don't think I signed up to this platform before but thought I would introduce myself I like being babied a whole lot especially when I am stressed as well. I find diapers to be my comfort zone I really wanna add a pfp to this account and don't wanna toss just any pfp to my account to be a little bit more professional my dream is to be in a forever nursery or my own custom baby room I'm currently trying to get off social media platforms and back onto forums. The last forum I was on which I was an actual Teen Diaper Lover or well when I was a preteen and admit I was a preteen diaper lover at the time it was DBZInDiapers I was last on which was a long time ago like the mid 2000s timeline. I'm very friendly for the most part but actually shy and will need to see if I did join in the past but I doubt I have cause none of the emails I currently used was on this site. I don't mind doing baby talk but I kinda wish to be a SFW babyfur.   It's also a dream to experience being diapered again in real life so my actual age is 33 but I'm kinda what you call funsized whatever it is like 5"3 but I don't even like look my age hopefully I can become friends with all kinds of people and that this forum is pretty active because I am sick of not having anything babyfur to hang out on and want more of a social forum experience but nice to meet everyone if you read this I'm kinda shy for the most part and admit I've had slight abuse in the past in regards of real life being a kid in School growing up but adulthood seems to be trying to make up for it but I do miss being a kid in some situation how stressful being an adult is nice to meet anyone if you're around I will say I do got some ADHD and I kinda yap a lot but I am overall pretty friendly with people don't be afraid to talk babish if you want to I do kinda got a bad habit of repeating myself.   Also I do apologize if I get anything wrong but hope we still become friends. 😅

Simpsons Robot Nanny

You managed to surprise me, with that last chapter. All the chapters before were built on lies and on the tension they created between Liam and the others, Sophie especially, and now all is gone and we're literally in front of the naked truth. I'm looking forward to know Millie better.