9 months in and still can't pee in front of friends or family

[Diapersarecool1]

I am 9 months in. My best guess is that I am probably peeing 70-100 times a day with dribbles in between. I still have trouble peeing in front of anyone that I know.

It's kind of turning me into a hermit. If I am around someone that I know, my bladder clenches unbelievably tight and nothing will come out. After I get alone again it takes several minutes of trying to pee to get anything to come out. Obviously this is not a good situation. As my bladder capacity has significantly decreased in the past 3 months, I have avoided being around other people more and more to avoid this. 

Also, now my wife's best friend (and a coworker of me and my wife) knows that I wear diapers now. 

The root of me not being able to pee is that I worry that someone will be able to tell that I a peeing so everything just clenches.

Anyone else have this problem?

How did you fix it?

I thought about therapy but I don't want the therapist to think that I am crazy.

 

[Goerge]

I’ve been wearing 20 years. Wetting and messing. I remember the day I had to stand like a statue just to start peeing. Trust me it gets easier with time, just practice wetting in different positions.

[CodHero24]

It takes a long time but the more you wear and wet your diaper the easier it will become.

Wetting in the car while driving is one of the biggest hurdles I overcame.

Not only is it easy for me to wet in the car now,

But one time I was riding with in the front passenger seat with my friends for an hour car ride,

and I wasn't wearing my diaper and after the hour long car ride I got out and felt a small wet spot on the back of my shorts,

And I observed a small wet spot on the seat...

I had not only wet in the car with my friends, but without even knowing it...

[diaperdl]

It was super awkward when I wet my pants in front of my mom, especially right after getting over Covid. Back then, I didn't even realize it was because of Covid, like a lingering effect. I was really hard on myself, thinking it was all my fault because I'd been doing it on purpose for years.

[FretaBWet]

Before you started 9 months ago did you suffer from shy bladder? I have known someone that couldn't get the stream going regardless of how desperate the need if someone was at a urinal near them.

Hugs,

Freta

[foreverdl]

I have worn 24/7 and I still have issues trying to pee in front of anybody except my wife. I will burst when I can't hold it, or I will dribble without knowing that I did.  But to pee on purpose it takes concentration and that's hard to do without thinking 🤔 someone will see . Like when you see a baby or toddler pee or poop, they make a face, if you can look into a mirror and pee so you will be comfortable that you're not making a face?? it may help get past the worry of it. I have tried to look off like staring at TV, or something and relax enough to let go, it works out some for me.

[Goerge]

I can pee almost instantly in front off people and its very easy, without any problems.

[deewet]

When you have OAB, it will happen no matter where of when.  Top this off by some meds for my BP that makes me go a lot and in the morning, I have to be close to a potty  for sure as I will be going about twice per hour!

 

[Hannah YMS]

The best way I know of to overcome "shy bladder" (paruresis) is to use the "Breath Holding Technique" (linked). Give it a shot and let us know how it goes!

[foreverdl]

I have to add to my other comment . This is soooo great.

I was driving the cart at the store today and it was like an oh shit,,,,,,, I haven't peed very much in public , well I had to pee and it was a few seconds notice and I was peeing, I use the sit down driving ones or my own walking cart also. But anyhow I was driving and my wife walking , and I was almost panicked . I got all warm in my diaper, it was sooo nice, and warm. I didn't leak so that was very cool. I ended up finishing it full at home. But that's a huge thing I made pee wet diaper in a store,,,, so much progress . I am slowly loosing my pee control . But that's what I want............

This is so much of a breakthrough for me.

[~Brian~]

@Diapersarecool1

I don't think there really is a way to "fix" this, in the practical sense, and the reason I say that is that in wearing diapers, remember that as a young child, you were EXPECTED to use them, and that is because you had ZERO control.  Then you went through Potty Training, then you learned that you were expected to NOT pee in your pants, but to use the potty for that. 

If you use the logic that you have learned to use the toilet for all that, your body may be conditioned for that, so you are not simply gonna use a diaper just cause someone has you put one on, or puts one on you.  You have to CONDITION your body and then, eventually, you'll be able to pee and poop very easily, because your brain won't  think that its "wrong" to do".  It takes TIME for you to learn that, as it has for me, but I've been doing it for a while now

Good Luck!

Brian