Newly Incontinent: NEED HELP

[StinkyBoy24]

Hi everyone. I’m a 22 year old ftm man, and I’m worried that I’m becoming urinary incontinent. Although I am ABDL, I have always tried to remain in control. However, whenever I laugh, sneeze, move too quickly, hear water running, or even enter the bathroom, I start to pee.

this has been happening casually for a while now, but for the past 6ish months, it’s gotten much worse, and I’m honestly nervous because I’m not even done with uni yet.
 

Does anyone have any tips to prevent this problem from expanding? Or tips as to what products to use to maybe start wearing more regularly? I have ABDL diapers I wear recreationally, but I can’t just wear them normally. I’m too nervous for that. 
 

Thanks in advance for the help! I have been really nervous and embarrassed, but I just want to know how to take control so that my pants aren’t always slightly damp ?

[~Brian~]

2 hours ago, StinkyBoy24 said:

Hi everyone. I’m a 22 year old ftm man, and I’m worried that I’m becoming urinary incontinent. Although I am ABDL, I have always tried to remain in control. However, whenever I laugh, sneeze, move too quickly, hear water running, or even enter the bathroom, I start to pee.

this has been happening casually for a while now, but for the past 6ish months, it’s gotten much worse, and I’m honestly nervous because I’m not even done with uni yet.
 

Does anyone have any tips to prevent this problem from expanding? Or tips as to what products to use to maybe start wearing more regularly? I have ABDL diapers I wear recreationally, but I can’t just wear them normally. I’m too nervous for that. 
 

Thanks in advance for the help! I have been really nervous and embarrassed, but I just want to know how to take control so that my pants aren’t always slightly damp ?

@StinkyBoy24

First off welcome:   sounds to me like you have urge incontinence, I am also urinary incontinence, and bowel incontinence as well, so I am incontinent both ways. One of the things that you have to do is to figure out a way to deal with you're incontinent while allowing yourself to enjoy your life to the fullest extent possible. You may have incontinence, but the idea is that it shouldn't have you. It might take you a while to come to grips with the fact that you may need diapers or other incontinence aids to help you to deal with the situation, but I can tell you from experience that it is much more advantageous to wear diapers most of the time if you are having issues with incontinence and releasing whatever you have men holding wherever you are. It is a lot easier to be able to have a plan in place to be able to deal with it, and then just roll with it, rather than to worry about whether someone is going to find out about it. The most important thing is, that if you are experiencing incontinence that you want to deal with it in an appropriate manner, and by appropriate I mean that the solution you find works for you, and is easy for you to deal with. I started wearing diapers in 2019 and went 24/7 in 2020- the reason for this is because most of the time I was dealing with situations where I was having more accidents than anything else, and I was just releasing from both ends at any time, and this was becoming an issue. I also have cerebral palsy, which is a neurological condition, and this condition also affects muscles and your skeletal system, your nerves and other things: so eventually, I found it easier just to wear diapers, rather than to worry about making a mess and having to clean myself up every five minutes. Once I accepted that I had need for diapers, it was simply a matter of time and I just accepted that typers were a part of my life, and they made my life easier to deal with.

Part of the stigma that people probably deal with is that they are worried that someone is going to find out about what they're doing, what they are wearing, and then they will end up getting shunned or chastised or picked on because of What they decide to do to take care of a problem. One of the problems that people Have to understand is that some people do not have a choice, and people should not feel guilty one bit if they have to use incontinence supplies to deal with a situation. I finally came to that realization after dealing with so many things in 2019: most of the time that I was dealing with just having accidents from both ends, and I just got sick of it- and I went to the doctor and asked for help. There is no shame, or guilt, and you should not feel embarrassed if you feel the need to wear or use. There are many of us on this site who use their diapers for their intended purposes and they do it without hesitation and without worry or embarrassment or anything of that nature.

The thing is:  You CAN WEAR diapers: if you need them, there is no shame in it, and you should feel comfortable doing so. I know that it can be embarrassing at times, because sometimes you just can't control what happens. When you have a disability like mine, that deals with muscles and nerves and other issues, your disability maybe cerebral palsy, but there are underlying conditions that may complicate that one disability, and 90% of the time people who are disabled they have CP may and also up with being incontinent on unable to control their bladder or their bowels.  You wear 4 enjoyment anyway, so the only difference is that you have to use it to be able to deal with your bathroom issues. Once you accept that you need diapers, you can then turn around and say " it's no big deal, it happens all the time". Believe me when I tell you, when you have issues and you have limited to no control, a diaper is a friend, and can be used to help you in more ways than one period sure it's a little distressing to deal with a dirty diaper, the smell, the mess, and the embarrassment, but sometimes the best thing to do is to just diaper up and be able to have your protection on. There have been times when I sit right here in my chair, and I feel it coming so fast that I can't even make the words that I have to go, and I've already gone: this means that I have to get up and be able to start the process to clean myself up which can last from anywhere from 5 to 20 minutes depending on how bad it is. But at least, I have my diapers and I'm not afraid to use them nor I am afraid to wear them or to let people that need to know that I use them let them know that I have them and why. What I also remember and always advise is that no one else other than those whom you trust should know that you wear or use diapers: this is because there are certain people that would use information of this type against you and that would not be a good idea, this is not to say that some individuals would not do the right thing, but if the wrong person got wind of this the information that they get could be used against you, and they could out you and make it very uncomfortable for you. I wouldn't worry about that, but if you need to use diapers, go ahead and use them, because there is no shame in it.

Brian

[littlecait]

2 hours ago, StinkyBoy24 said:

Hi everyone. I’m a 22 year old ftm man, and I’m worried that I’m becoming urinary incontinent. Although I am ABDL, I have always tried to remain in control. However, whenever I laugh, sneeze, move too quickly, hear water running, or even enter the bathroom, I start to pee.

this has been happening casually for a while now, but for the past 6ish months, it’s gotten much worse, and I’m honestly nervous because I’m not even done with uni yet.
 

Does anyone have any tips to prevent this problem from expanding? Or tips as to what products to use to maybe start wearing more regularly? I have ABDL diapers I wear recreationally, but I can’t just wear them normally. I’m too nervous for that. 
 

Thanks in advance for the help! I have been really nervous and embarrassed, but I just want to know how to take control so that my pants aren’t always slightly damp ?

Are you taking hormones for your transition or had any surgery? I get that's a personal question which you might not want to answer publicly but talk to your Dr because sometimes those things can cause this problem.

[PlstkBakdnghtnday]

5 hours ago, StinkyBoy24 said:

Hi everyone. I’m a 22 year old ftm man, and I’m worried that I’m becoming urinary incontinent. Although I am ABDL, I have always tried to remain in control. However, whenever I laugh, sneeze, move too quickly, hear water running, or even enter the bathroom, I start to pee.

this has been happening casually for a while now, but for the past 6ish months, it’s gotten much worse, and I’m honestly nervous because I’m not even done with uni yet.
 

Does anyone have any tips to prevent this problem from expanding? Or tips as to what products to use to maybe start wearing more regularly? I have ABDL diapers I wear recreationally, but I can’t just wear them normally. I’m too nervous for that. 
 

Thanks in advance for the help! I have been really nervous and embarrassed, but I just want to know how to take control so that my pants aren’t always slightly damp ?

Megamax are discreet and great for a long day or about 4 hours at the bar

[FretaBWet]

Hi StinkyBoy24, I'm MTF and was married for 15 years to an FTM and I have urge incontinence and an overactive bladder so I can relate to your issues. My first question is have you discussed this with a medical professional? If you haven't that would probably be a good step to take if you can. My second question is do you have a history of bladder issues from when you were younger? I ask because it's not likely that your transition is the root cause. I am not a doctor and I'm not saying it isn't the cause, just that it's less likely. My next question is about how many times per day on average are you having issues? What you choose to use should be based on need since you have playtime well covered. If you're having light issues similar to what women have after childbirth you may choose to use some type of pad for male leakage. An athletic supporter would work super to hold a male shaped pad. Easy to just slip out when damp or wet and easy to carry spares in a pocket to go to the men's room. If you're having bigger accidents you might try a pull-up or a cloth backed disposable. Think of this as a problem that you start trying the least invasive solution and work your way up as needed. Feel free to DM me if the need arises.

Hugs,

Freta

[CodHero24]

If it's just light urinary incontinence just get some pull-up style diapers.

ABENA makes the best ones, you just have to find some that fit you well.

[Kawaharu]

On 7/7/2022 at 8:20 AM, CodHero24 said:

If it's just light urinary incontinence just get some pull-up style diapers.

ABENA makes the best ones, you just have to find some that fit you well.

Pull ups are just for those who have light incontinence or are being potty trained and need some protection.

I wear diapers all the time and I wear Megamax diapers with a boost because I can go on with life and never have to worry about going to the potty ever again.

[rusty pins]

One thing that I haven't seen anyone bring up yet is going to your doctor to get checked out to see if there is any medical issue that's causing you to wet yourself.  Eliminate that first of all and make sure your health is not at risk.

Second, you say you want to remain in control.  lots of diaper wearers want that too.  If you feel that way, talk to your doctor and see what he can recommend for strengthening your bladder muscles.  Keagle excersizes or things like that, perhaps medication.

Third, you say, "Does anyone have any tips to prevent this problem from expanding? Or tips as to what products to use to maybe start wearing more regularly? I have ABDL diapers I wear recreationally, but I can’t just wear them normally. I’m too nervous for that."  People here are suggesting you wear big thick diapers like MegaMax and just get over your feelings.  I'm not sure some of them actually read your post, or if they did, they are advising you to be like them and wear diapers without a care in the world.  What may be one person's desires or lifestyle doesn't work for others, especially one who states, "I’m worried that I’m becoming urinary incontinent. Although I am ABDL, I have always tried to remain in control. However, whenever I laugh, sneeze, move too quickly, hear water running, or even enter the bathroom, I start to pee.   It’s gotten much worse, and I’m honestly nervous because I’m not even done with uni yet.  Does anyone have any tips to prevent this problem from expanding? Or tips as to what products to use to maybe start wearing more regularly? I have ABDL diapers I wear recreationally, but I can’t just wear them normally. I’m too nervous for that.   I just want to know how to take control so that my pants aren’t always slightly damp."  

The key words I have highlighted in bold tell me this member is not looking to embrace a 24/7 ABDL lifestyle in thick and obvious diapers.  He wants help to keep the issue from getting worse.  He's worried about becoming urinary incontinent.  If he didn't care, he wouldn't be asking for help so telling him to just get over it and wear 24/7, thick diapers is not all that helpful for the problem he asked help for.  You can still have AB/DL interests and wear your diapers when you feel like it, but that doesn't mean a person wants to wear them all the time because he's starting to have some issues controlling his bladder.  He says he's always tried to remain in control, therefor it sounds that he wants to remain in control, has worries he's becoming incontinent, it's gotten much worse and he doesn't want people telling him to just wear diapers 24/7 and embrace it, he wants "tips to prevent the problem from expanding".  He says he can't wear his ABDL diapers that he uses recreationally as normal protection due to his nervousness.  I'll give you that.  If you have a need and no other choices, you do need to get over being nervous, however that doesn't mean you have to use the thickest diapers with the most babyish print for everyday protection, especially when he laughs, sneezes, moves too quickly, hears water running, or even enters the bathroom he starts to pee.  It depends on the severity. If his bladder empty's fully all the time, he may need actual diapers.  Only he knows the severity of his accidents and whether disposable underwear would keep his pants dry and for how long or if actual diapers are needed.  He says his pants are always "slightly damp" so maybe it;s not a full on flood emptying his bladder, just some leakage as he says when he laughs or sneezes or hears water running.  Perhaps disposable underwear may work well until he finds out why he's having these issues from a qualified medical doctor.

I'm focused on helping this member try and keep his control, which seems to be his aim, trying to help with his worries about becoming urinary incontinent and prevent the problem from getting worse.  Best advice I can offer at this point is SEE YOUR DOCTOR OR A UROLOGIST!  Don't just follow the advise people are giving that says just wear diapers, get over being nervous about it and enjoy it.  Just because that is what they like to do doesn't mean it's the solution for you.  You need to decide if you want to just give up and become incontinent and wear diapers full time 24/7 or not.  I don't think that's what you want, otherwise your wouldn't have posted what you did asking for help to prevent the problem from expanding, stating you have always tried to remain in control and are worried about becoming incontinent.

[FretaBWet]

7 hours ago, rusty pins said:

One thing that I haven't seen anyone bring up yet is going to your doctor to get checked out to see if there is any medical issue that's causing you to wet yourself.  Eliminate that first of all and make sure your health is not at risk.

Rusty, I don't usually have a an issue with your posts and opinions but in this case I would suggest you reread the thread more carefully. My first question was have you gone to a medical professional and then suggested that he do that. I also suggested that he start with the least amount of protection and work up from there.

I also believed many of the people replying either did not read the post carefully, read the post and didn't understand or just wanted to win over a convert.

Hugs,

Freta

[Rob110]

On 7/6/2022 at 4:28 PM, StinkyBoy24 said:

Hi everyone. I’m a 22 year old ftm man, and I’m worried that I’m becoming urinary incontinent. Although I am ABDL, I have always tried to remain in control. However, whenever I laugh, sneeze, move too quickly, hear water running, or even enter the bathroom, I start to pee.

this has been happening casually for a while now, but for the past 6ish months, it’s gotten much worse, and I’m honestly nervous because I’m not even done with uni yet.
 

Does anyone have any tips to prevent this problem from expanding? Or tips as to what products to use to maybe start wearing more regularly? I have ABDL diapers I wear recreationally, but I can’t just wear them normally. I’m too nervous for that. 
 

Thanks in advance for the help! I have been really nervous and embarrassed, but I just want to know how to take control so that my pants aren’t always slightly damp ?

  Sorry to hear you are dealing with a bladder issue at a young age, unfortunately bladder control issues can and do increase in retention loss as time passes.  Have you seen an urologist as ic issues are caused by an underlying condition some life threatening so getting checked out is a must. 

 Wearing a premium diaper does make managing incontinence issues easier as you can trust the diaper to keep your pants dry, diapers like Incontrol hybrid have reusable tapes (similar to velcro) so you can unfasten the diaper to use the washroom if you make it in time and then you can reuse the dry diaper.  Wearing diapers is embarrassing st first but it’s something you get use to and all the stress disappears of what if some one notices goes away.  

For now wear a premium diaper you can trust to keep your pants dry until you can see an urologist to get checked out as they may be able to quickly out the root cause and reverse  your control loss.   If you find there is nothing that can be done to restore your control remember you are not alone in dealing with bladder issues and we are all here to help and support each other, and worst case being diaper dependent does not change your daily life all that much for the most part. 

Hopefully you can get and urologist appointment quickly 

[Kawaharu]

On 7/10/2022 at 5:26 AM, Rob110 said:

Wearing a premium diaper does make managing incontinence issues easier as you can trust the diaper to keep your pants dry, diapers like Incontrol hybrid have reusable tapes (similar to velcro) so you can unfasten the diaper to use the washroom if you make it in time and then you can reuse the dry diaper.  Wearing diapers is embarrassing st first but it’s something you get use to and all the stress

Wearing diapers does make being incontinent a whole lot better to deal with. It’s why being incontinent, I trust my diapers to keep me dry and padded.