How to decide when to go out in public?

[Anonymous12]

Hi there,

  I hope that someone can give me some pointers as to how to approach this situation. I have cerebral palsy and I have started wearing adult diapers when I go out in public because I have almost had an accident a few times because I couldn’t make it to the public restroom in time. Ever since wearing them, I feel more confident, happier, and I want to go out more because I know I have all my bases covered so to speak.

  However, I am torn because I don’t want to completely give up underwear but I also want to go out in public when I’m invited somewhere or there’s a movie that I want to see. 
 

  Does anyone have any advice on what I can do? I would be willing to give up regular underwear if I absolutely had to but I hope that I ca find a better way.

[Apache Raccoon]

39 minutes ago, Anonymous12 said:

Hi there,

  I hope that someone can give me some pointers as to how to approach this situation. I have cerebral palsy and I have started wearing adult diapers when I go out in public because I have almost had an accident a few times because I couldn’t make it to the public restroom in time. Ever since wearing them, I feel more confident, happier, and I want to go out more because I know I have all my bases covered so to speak.

  However, I am torn because I don’t want to completely give up underwear but I also want to go out in public when I’m invited somewhere or there’s a movie that I want to see. 
 

  Does anyone have any advice on what I can do? I would be willing to give up regular underwear if I absolutely had to but I hope that I ca find a better way.

What about wearing which ever one you feel like at the time.

And maybe try putting like an incontinence pad in your undies 

[Anonymous12]

Hi there!

 Thank you for the reply! I thought about wearing pads but I don’t think they can hold #2.

  I might change when I get home from the outing but I’m worried it might get annoying after awhile.

   I don’t mean to put you down- I think you have fantastic ideas but I don’t think pads would be practical unless they can hold everything.

  Apologize for TMI

[Clr224]

If you’re worried about accidents while out in public, then wear a diaper instead of regular underwear.  There is no shame in that and with the right products, no one will know what kind of underwear you have on.  Given that you’re experiencing both bladder and bowel accidents, it seems to me that diapers are your only practical choice.

There is really no practical way to conceal a bowel accident.  If you’re out in public, you’ll either need to head home almost immediately or adjourn to the nearest restroom to clean up and change, assuming you’ve come prepared with the necessary supplies.

[BabyJune]

Although I have been opposed to wearing a diaper in public (under my clothes, of course) in March 2020 I decided to at least try it. So far it has gone without any issues. I now will wear occasionally when going out to lunch with Mom and while shopping. I'm still a bit scared of something going wrong (accident, medical incident, etc.) but it hasn't stopped me. Recently, my neighbor came over and needed me to help him take his wife's car to the repair shop. I was diapered and didn't have time to change, so I went "as is," also without incident. Most of the time when I'm out, I forget I'm even wearing a diaper and I don't wet it a lot to avoid any smell.

[dlnoir]

As long as you don’t overdo it, nobody will notice you wear a diaper, and if they do they most likely   will not have the guts to mention it or make remarks. I have been wearing diapers 24/7 for the last 22 years and I can only imagine somebody noticed something at one point or another. I never heard any comments or remarks.  

[Anonymous12]

Hi guys,

 

 thank you for everything. I wanted to clarify that the diapers are in case able-bodied people are hogging the public handicap bathroom stall and I can’t hold it any longer (has happened on several occasions). My helpers usually assist me in getting them on and will probably change me if I need it. I’m just new to this and I’m not sure how to determine if I should wear underwear at home and schedule days to go out or...

[Newbee]

Ultimately you need to do what feels right for you I know going out in public wearing a diaper can be a bit stressful at first but you do get use to it and you can get diapers that are discreet and will last a few hours.

 

[Little Sherri]

Wearing in public is definitely one of those hurdles to get over, but what I've discovered over my close-to-two-years of wearing diapers 24/7 is that pretty much nobody pays any attention to my butt, the bulkiness of my silhouette, or any faint sounds that might be emanating from my pants, except me. When I started at this, I would only wear the slimmest, cloth-backed diapers outside of the house. However, as I got used to wearing those out and about, every once in a while I would make brief ventures out in larger, plastic-backed diapers, if the dog needed a late-night walk, for example. Then I found myself at midnight, needing cold medication, already wearing my night diaper, so I pulled on some oversized trousers, and made a quick run to the drug store... and it was a non-event. From there, I tested the waters, wearing bigger diapers on more and more errands, and I realized that, as nice as it was to be able to wear some form of diaper all the time, what I really preferred, both from a feel, and from a security perspective, was plastic diapers of a medium to heavy weight - ABDL diapers, primarily. So, I got strategic about it. The paradigm shift for me occurred when I started buying my jeans one size up from the normal size, and, coupled that with wearing a onesie that looks like a regular t-shirt, thus taming any concerns about my diaper rising up above my pants while reaching or bending over. Now, I'm in a plastic diaper all the time, with the exception of at the gym, where I go back to my cloth-backed ones because they conceal well under running shorts. 

So, if being out in public and not in a diaper preys on your anxieties about having an accident, and being out in public and wearing a diaper preys on your anxieties about your diaper being noticed, strategically up-size your wardrobe a bit, throw a long shirt over it, and voila, you have the best of both worlds. Onesies are great as well - absolutely key for me - but given your situation, I'm guessing it could be a struggle to get one on and off, although I would say this - even wearing a onesie unsnapped, the tail of the shirt will end up hanging way, way down inside your pants, and it will still do a very good job of making sure that your diaper doesn't come onto the radar if your shirt rides up or your pants hang low.  

As far as sound goes, I used to think that my plastic diapers were loud enough to have an echo to them, but absolutely nobody has ever noticed them, as far as I can tell. I have worked in close proximity with friends, fixing cars etc, and it just goes unnoticed. As far as scents are concerned, modern disposable diapers do an amazing job of delaying the breakdown of pee, to the point that it really takes longer than you're ever likely going to be in any single diaper, before smell would become an issue. As for solid output, plastic diapers can contain that temporarily, but obviously, if you've scorched the earth, that has to be dealt with sooner than later. 

Good luck, @Anonymous12, and feel free to reach out anytime. 

[steve in diaps]

Like you I didn't want to give up underwear. I was  late bed wetter as a kid and diapers where the fix then. I was embarrassed ? when we went to family gatherings and us kids slept together.  So I was glad to be rid of them. After my sec back injury I tried not to disclose my incon issues.  I did not want to lose a job and embarrassed. I wore a pull-ups to a nerve test. Used the bathroom and changed into a gown in private.  But nerve test overloaded my system and lost control. They explained I would have to get past what others think and embarrassment. I have a new normal for me. I use protective products so I can get our and do things I enjoy. Only close friends and family know. Unfortunately I had to disclose my medical history to newer employers. You can't hide anything that might impact your job requirements. 

I view protective products as simple tools to allow me to get out and enjoy life. Just plan ahead for accidents.