steve in diaps

It does take time to accept wearing whatever type of protection you think you need for that day or event. I keep and travel with pull-ups, diapers,, booster pads, bed pads, wipes, gloves and towels. Plus change of clothes. As my needs change with diet, activities, weather.I had a choice of never leaving home on disability or try to get out and stay active to keep my ability to walk. The nursing home can wait. I have accomplished alot since my two back injuries. Like you I got hung up on thinking about the future, instead try to concentrate on what you can do or enjoy today. The future will come and we can't stop it. Doctors stopped putting limitations on me and are amazed at how well I have done. A good friend of mine told me it you wake up on the sunny side of the grass it's a good day. If not you don't have to worry about it.

One addition, I didn't admit to bladder issues after my back injury. When my back and legs got worse I think they noticed my urgent rush to the bathroom in therapy. Five months later with no improvement they did a nerve test. I didn't want to tell them so I wouldn't lose my job. It ended when I left the nerve test in a diaper. Had I told them maybe things might have improved as it took another seven years to walk this well. Its been fourteen years and still have impairments, pull-ups and diapers.

Sciatica is normally the result of something wrong. Like muscle strains, lower back or spinal injuries or degenerative issues. Lower back and spinal problems can have an effect on the bladder. For me, I have past low back injury with nerve damage from waist down. I have sciatica on both sides but don't feel it much on the left side. I don't get much warning for my bladder and have spasms. Therapy and stretches help. I wear cargo pants so I don't have anything in my back pockets that can irritate the sciatica. Ibuprofen or steroids can help. Did you tell the doctor about bladder issues? If it's not related to an injury it needs to get checked either way.

I went into the hospital wearing pull-ups for heart bypass surgery. Someone misread my medication list. Ended up on linzess and mira-lax added to my meds. Was in the hospital think seven days or so. Had a very bad diaper rash and my skin on my back side blistered and peeled. Nurses changed my diapers every hour or so and treated the rash. Went home in diapers. Seemed like a month to get control of my digestive system. Doctors and nurses are never surprised about pull-ups or diapers I wear.

Last time I woke up after surgery they explained they had a problem putting the cath in and had to use a larger one. It looked bigger than a soda straw. Maybe my imagination. I had ask for a diaper but was told they couldn't use that for surgery. So they go to pull it out I felt a tug and it didn't ? move. The nurse said we have to get it out ! I explained I didn't put it there and didn't want one in the first place. A few more tugs and nothing. She gave it a very hard tug and it popped out and I was left in pain and bleeding. Was told how sorry they were. Then they put me in diapers. Seems the spasms are worse since then. ? Wouldn't you think that using botox to paralyze the bladder in the open or a relaxed state would be better and just use external cath? I would still need bowel protection.

It's 1:35 am. I will be thinking about this all night. I had to ask. As I think about it the doctors never did say how they stretch the bladder muscles for the spasms just told me about the bowel part. I'm really glad I didn't ask. I think I will deal with it till I'm force to change plans. The idea of paralyzing the bladder and then sticking a cath in to drain it kinda sucks. Since I have spinal nerve issues after doing that my luck I would still have spasms. And I thought the doctor lost his mind when he told me how they could stretch my bowel muscles.

Oh NO ? that's not gonna happen. And if it doesn't help with bowel spasms not sure how it would help me. The telephone pole doesn't sound like fun either. I just hope what I'm doing keeps working as the options don't sound like much fun.

I know I'm going to hate the answer and I avoided asking earlier. So I understand what Botox does or at least I think I do. Not to sound too ignorant, but where do they stick the needle ? Im sure that since my last catheter YANK OUT that this needle idea must be way more fun. 2nd question is if it paralyzes the muscles how do you pee and poop? Just asking because when I'm in spasm I can't go #1 or2 or both until things get relaxed. Almost afraid of the second answer. Last time to the hospital they mentioned a cath and decided diapers would work.

I'm not fond of caths, last one hurt for two weeks after they yanked it out. OUCH. Mine is mostly spinal nerve issues. So when things tighten up I try to take time and stretch my butt, seems to help both. Doctors are OK with that, but think they should be the ones doing it. I think they might get too much enjoyment at my expense. I don't have the best control now. They also mentioned if the muscles were to pop or tear that might stop the spasms. But then I would need diapers all the time. Right now it pull-ups day and night and diapers as needed. The last long term was three months after bypass surgery. Just hard to do the stretching by myself and relaxe at the same time.

I do wish diet would fix my spasms. Tried it for awhile but doctors said that since I get spasms in all my muscles and even my diaphragm. Not much left that's fixable. But I'm down to 133lbs, ya. If I loose more I will need suspenders to hold my pull-ups or diapers up. ?. I went back to tea and water, rarely anything else

I get bowel and bladder spasms as well. Mine are from back injury related issues. Mine seem to get set off by two things and sometimes a combination of them. One is I do not get much warning for the need to go to the bathroom. So I try to hold too hard trying to make it and my muscles will start to spasm and leak and I tighten more to hold on. Then when I get there and try to relaxe to go it locks closed. With enough pain to put me on the floor at times. It will finally let up enough to go in a painful spastic spurts. The bowel does simular till my body forces the release. Doctors wanted to do dilation of both muscle groups to try and relaxe everything. But by the time they got done explaining the procedures and that I would need my diapers for # 1 and 2 for three days to two weeks. That's if no injury to the muscles. I told them I would try dilate butt with small toys first. No use in letting them have all the fun as l would have been sedated.. Over time I have learn when things are tighting up, if I do that it helps alot. Oh and I can't orgasm while doing that. It's about relaxing and minor stretching. It's seems to help my bladder as well.

I also think for some that denial plays a part. For myself in the beginning I was in denial over the need for the need to wear diapers and wanting ways to avoid the problems I had. As I had good days and bad days that I would fail. And I thought if my back pain would get better that my incontinence would be gone just set me up to fail again. Sometimes we want others to prop us up so we feel better about ourselves. But incontinence can only be managed. It's nice to know I'm not the only one that has issues but I'm the one that has to accept and deal with my issues. It still comes down to personal responsibility. For a time I was caught up in the ciycle of not wanting to needing to wear. And worry someone would find out. And medical community saying that they were undergarments, Not diapers did not help. Now I can get by with HD pull-ups most of the time but have my diapers handy for when I need them.

I forgot to mention that I'm open to private messages as well. I have to warn you I'm still learning about that. My have to throw a brick at me to get my attention. I'm still not sure how the chat part works.

Hi, toejamer. I'm still interested in meeting others. I still work nights and have most weekends free. I have learned alot from others on this site over time. It seems I am always learning and adapting to my need for protection. Now I'm starting to find ways to get some enjoyment out of my need to wear protection. ? I wish at times I could be more care free as many seem to be. I'm still working on my hangup. At least I'm past my denial for my need to wear protection.

I have learned over time with trail and error. Most of the time I use high capacity pull-ups and diapers on the rough days. I use timed bathroom breaks. Also bathroom breaks at the places for errands. Most of the time I get 5 to 15 min warning for the need to go to the bathroom. My hard part was a system for changing. I have a tactical vest that can hold a pull-up and small pack of wipes and gloves. When I had heart surgery the complications irritated my back and I used a walker for three months. So I put supplies in the storage box for changing. I also have a small bag I can carry supplies with me. I also carry extra clothes in to car if needed.. Can be somewhat embarrassing to explaining the need to carry it ito stores. " The I need to change my diaper" conversations. So find the products you are comfortable with and do some pre-planning and it will take some of the stress out of dealing with issues. It took me awhile to get to this point and I still have set backs. Accidents will happen just try to be proactive and get out and enjoy life and activities you are interested in.

Doctors say to do timed bathroom breaks. At work last I discovered I had a small accident. I cleanup I found I already had a rash started. So I'm using diaper cream for a few days as I have that raw ? sensation. Oh joy ?

?? I understand. After bypass surgery I couldn't get hard for 3 months or so. 5 or 6 months to orgasm. Thought I was going to die when it happened. Didn't try again for almost 3 months. First it was my back injuries = less orgasm strength. Then heart attack = even less strength and distance ?. Replaced stents = less again. After bypass = drip or just leak out. ? Now when I orgasm I wonder if it will come out. At least I don't pee when I'm hard. Just don't stay hard as long. Used to stay hard for the next round ? Doctors are not too concerned as I'm still breathing and walking. Any issues I have must be an illusion.

Sorry that is a hard issue to deal with. First I suggest not to get over stressed and wait for test results. There are many things that affect sexual functions. I have many issues and each one has an impact on my ability to function. But stress and worry can be self serving and can add to the problem. I know how hard that is to say or do. If you update us on what you find out.

Sounds like a plan. You might add an extra large bed pad. If I have to take a water pill at night I use a high capacity diaper and booster pad and protective pants with a bed pad. I have a mattress protector as well. Once the water pill kicks in my bladder control is gone day or night. But at night I'm asleep when it starts working. I may still leak but no bed clean up.

If anyone in the area wants to meet up, I'm game. I work nights through the week and have most weekends free. Would be nice to connect with others. And don't worry I'm very open-minded and don't judge others.

I finally accepted the peeing part but still have a though time with messy accidents. The cleanup sucks but I seem to get rashes easily. Everyone says it gets easier in time but I must have a very long ways to get there. So I understand that feeling but I have not found the answer ?

Hi Joep, or anyone else, I wouldn't mind. But I don't drink coffee ?. I'm happy with tea, but it makes me go more often Lol. I'm diabetic so all the good things are my weakness.

I was thinking about trying a dating site like that. I have had a hard time dating with all my medical issues. It scares them off if I'm upfront about it or they feel deceived if I wait to get to know them. I'm also looking for the best recommendations to avoid problems. I think most dating sites have scammers playing people.

Try not to stress over it. I know easier said than done. Just keep trying different ideas till you find what works best. You might even ask your helpers for ideas if your comfortable with them. I thought my problem was terrible after my upper back injury. Then I had the lower back injury. Each time was learning a new way to deal with the issues. Every time my meds are change or it turns hot or cold I have to adjust for it. It sucks at times pull-ups and diapers are hot to work in. Rashes are just terrible. I keep trying new ideas to make things work. It's always a work in progress. A good friend told me, that if you wake up on the sunny side of the grass it's a good day. As it could always be worse. Lol

I can understand your dilemma. I was in denial for a very long time of even admitting to needing any type of protection. Since I work full time I'm trying to keep as much control as I can. It seems to be a loosing battle at times. The hydration issue can be a serious problem. Too little can be hard on the kidneys and bowel. Too much and pee almost non stop and loose bowel. With meds it can be hard to manage. I think giving up control is a very personal decision based on your situation. If your mostly home all the time it may not be an issue. If you work it can lead to complications. My employer hired me with disabilities and they make accommodations for that. As long as it does not create an undue burden on the employer When I go to the hospital in pull-ups, they usually put me in diapers because it's easier for them to manage it. There is no shame if you decide give up control and wear diapers. It's only how you accept it. Try wearing and using 24/7 for a week at a time just to find out. ? It only took ten years for me to accept I could not ride a motorcycle again. The part that my hands went dead and non functional from vibration didn't seem to help. New meaning for thrill ride.?