24/7 startups, and unexpected pitfalls?

[Little Sherri]

I read an interesting article today, sent by one of the local "home healthcare" diaper suppliers I use. The topic was why they still (italics theirs) call them "Adult Diapers". They said that while some adults find the term to be taboo, undignified, or even offensive, internet searches for products in this category use the term "diaper" 100 to 1 over "adult brief" or "incontinence brief". The supplier (Healthwick) goes on to say that they exclusively used the term "adult brief" for a period of time, but they weren't getting the best search optimization results, and, they also got complaints from people who ordered products described as "briefs" that turned out to be diapers, when they were expecting pullups or other underwear-like products that did not involve tabs. 

Personally, I much prefer the term "diapers" to "briefs", which I always related to age and infirmity. I also use tabbed products exclusively these days, because in my opinion they offer a superior fit, and, they have much greater capacity. Also, they're cuter. But I understand the stigma surrounding the term "diaper", because nearly all of us had it burned into our brains during a critical phase of our development that wearing diapers was for babies, was bad, embarrassing, disgusting, and needed to be left behind. So, of course, the unfortunate among us who were not able to comply with societal expectations with respect to underwear chronology had to shoulder the indignity and humiliation of wearing products with pictures of smiling babies on the packaging, that used the term "diapers". 

At a point in maybe the 1990's, there was a shift over to products that referred to themselves as "pullups", "briefs" or "bedtime underwear" for older kids, but when I was growing up (the 1980's), plastic absorbent underpants only came with tapes on them, and were called diapers. Later, there were even attempts to apply euphemisms to products designed for babies - products such as "easy-ups" and "baby pants" that sidestepped using the terms diaper or nappy. I have no idea what adult products called themselves back then, because I wasn't paying attention to them, but once I started buying products for myself, I too was confused, much like some of the customers discussed in the article, by the term "briefs" - I used to have to study the packaging carefully, because I wanted something with sides that opened and closed, not something resembling a grandmother's panties that had to be pulled on, but that could be, if necessary, torn off. 

As an aside, I'm curious as to the terminology employed in the UK and Australia - outside of the ABDL (ABNL?) channels, are adult incontinence products referred to as "adult nappies"? 

As a kid, as far as I recall, what I wore to bed, and on the occasional road trip, were referred to by my parents primarily as diapers, and every now and then, as pajamas, when we were in company, primarily. Usually, they were pretty good about saying "Make sure you put on your Pajamas" or "Let's get you changed for bed" rather than "Time to put a diaper on" or "Let's get you into your Pampers". However, around the house, the D-word was the one primarily employed - "Bring a diaper downstairs with you" or "Run over to the next aisle and get me a box of your diapers." 

Interestingly, my wife, who did not grow up around diapers, as she did not have younger siblings, and based on photographic evidence, seems to have been potty trained by about age 2, doesn't generally use the d-word. In fact, I think she's used the word "Pampers" more often than "diapers", as she considers them interchangeable, like "Kleenex" versus "facial tissue". I'd have to pick through this thread and take a count to be sure. I know that recently she's said "Pampers" at least a couple of times. 

I've heard people here occasionally employ affectionate terms like "Diddies" or "Diapies", and sometimes brand names like Pampers or Huggies ("Your Huggies are showing..."). I'm curious as to if the diminutive terms were handed down by their parents, or if they just prefer them as adults, because they sound juvenile. Although the term "diaper" itself is, I guess, juvenile - why else would they need to attach the noun-used-as-adjective "adult" to the noun diaper? I've heard people use the term "baby diaper" before, but the products call themselves simply "diapers", generally. As an aside, I had one aunt who used to always say "baby diapers", and my sister at one point picked that up and started throwing it around  - "Did you remember to pack your baby diapers?" and "Mom said to put on a baby diaper", but my parents shut that down, mercifully. So, instead, my sister used to whistle the Luvs theme song from the 1980's.... "Luvs... your baby's comfort begins with Luvs....." under hear breath sometimes when she wanted to needle me without provoking the ire of the parental units. 

Here's the article: https://healthwick.ca/blogs/news-and-articles/why-do-we-still-call-them-adult-diapers?utm_source=Klaviyo&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=HW Newsletter - September 2021 - Revisit%3A Why do we still call them "adult diapers"%3F (ShZkMe)&_kx=96mb4vx7dBpUPxxmR8kOXOLKtNtyrGX-mnf2mV26jAc%3D.YcHcBW

The 1980's Luvs jingle I'm referring to is at about 2:30 into this video:

 

[BabyJilly_S]

1 hour ago, Little Sherri said:

As an aside, I'm curious as to the terminology employed in the UK and Australia - outside of the ABDL (ABNL?) channels, are adult incontinence products referred to as "adult nappies"? 

From a UK perspective I checked a couple of non abdl sites I use and incontinencechoice.co.uk says :-

(Pants for us are underwear, not trousers)

 

incontinenceshop.com says :-

This is the non abdl sister shop to of nappiesrus.co,uk  same location and everything, in there its :-

 

 

 

 

[oznl]

5 hours ago, Little Sherri said:

As an aside, I'm curious as to the terminology employed in the UK and Australia - outside of the ABDL (ABNL?) channels, are adult incontinence products referred to as "adult nappies"? 

In Australia, “adult nappy” is the overwhelming term used for these products by the general population.

But…

The healthcare sector and associated suppliers stubbornly persist in attempts to call them almost anything else:  Briefs, pads, protective undergarments all get flung around in a marketing-driven tower-of-babel on packaging and advertising but despite the quantity of lipstick deployed, Aussies know what pigs look like.

Briefly checking on the medical supply company I use for my daily-driver Abena products, I discover my L4 nappies are described by Abena as a “continence pad” (it seems that using the term incontinence could carry within it some whiff of failure – no pun intended).  The reseller HTML elves however didn’t get the marketing memo and categorise the product on their website under “all-in-one nappies”.

Babies’ nappies are nappies – end of.  This may occasionally be overridden by global branding strategies but again, the mob will have none of it.

Interestingly, I’ve noticed a trend in the latest generation of local ABDL to call them “diapers” or “dips”. 

Probably another example of cultural homogenization from North American controlled social media, like my browser that stubbornly attempts to enforce US spelling on everything a write.

[ppdude]

33 minutes ago, oznl said:

In Australia, “adult nappy” is the overwhelming term used for these products by the general population.

Probably another example of cultural homogenization from North American controlled social media, like my browser that stubbornly attempts to enforce US spelling on everything a write.

Nah. There's some kind of derived stigma that prevents them from being called diapers or nappies. By calling them a diaper or nappy they are associating you with an infant or toddler. I just wish they'd call them what they are. Who cares if someone ties you into infant or toddler behavior?

 

 

[Stroller]

An interesting question comes up here.  Is the internet leading to the decline of euphemisms?  If the only way a search engine will turn up a spade is if you call it a spade, rather than a manual earth moving device, then everyone will advertise spades.

In the UK (& I suspect Australia too), we've always been a bit more direct in our language than the US, at least in my lifetime.  Our bathrooms have baths in them.  Having said that, the adult nappies on the supermarket shelves here don't say 'nappies' on the package.  And you have to look hard to find 'incontinence', and what the f*** is a 'sensitive bladder'?  My own bladder cares a lot about other people and is easily offended, so I'd better stay in nappies.

[BedWetMark]

23 hours ago, oznl said:

In Australia, “adult nappy” is the overwhelming term used for these products by the general population.

But…

The healthcare sector and associated suppliers stubbornly persist in attempts to call them almost anything else:  Briefs, pads, protective undergarments all get flung around in a marketing-driven tower-of-babel on packaging and advertising but despite the quantity of lipstick deployed, Aussies know what pigs look like.

Briefly checking on the medical supply company I use for my daily-driver Abena products, I discover my L4 nappies are described by Abena as a “continence pad” (it seems that using the term incontinence could carry within it some whiff of failure – no pun intended).  The reseller HTML elves however didn’t get the marketing memo and categorise the product on their website under “all-in-one nappies”.

Babies’ nappies are nappies – end of.  This may occasionally be overridden by global branding strategies but again, the mob will have none of it.

Interestingly, I’ve noticed a trend in the latest generation of local ABDL to call them “diapers” or “dips”. 

Probably another example of cultural homogenization from North American controlled social media, like my browser that stubbornly attempts to enforce US spelling on everything a write.

I once had a few dates with someone who worked in a care home, she was my age, but refused to call them nappies. She had no issue with me wearing and messing around with them, but to her they were "pads". 

That seems to be the term most used here. Pads. What a crap, depressing term that is. 

14 hours ago, Stroller said:

, and what the f*** is a 'sensitive bladder'?  My own bladder cares a lot about other people and is easily offended, so I'd better stay in nappies.

Love it!  It's another annoyance of mine. 

[Little Sherri]

I went out sailing yesterday with a friend and colleague of mine, and with my new experience wearing a disposable diaper under water, I was even more wary than the last time I was on a boat, of what the implications would be if I were to have fallen in. Background - those of you who have read this far and still haven't clawed your eyes out or fallen into an irreversible coma, will recall that a while back, my wife thought it would be hilarious to push me into the pool when I was bent over at the side of it. I was NOT dressed for swimming at the time - I had shorts and a t-shirt on, over, of course, a diaper. Well, I imagine you can guess what happened to that undergarment once it was completely immersed in the water. Actually, the full ramifications took a bit longer than I would have thought... being waterproof and fairly snug, the diaper didn't immediately fill from stem to stern. But she pushed me into the deep end, and by the time I swam over to the edge and hoisted myself out, enough water had run down into it from around my waist that it was at about 150% of capacity, and it drained copiously once I stood up on the pool deck. It also inflated like an automotive airbag in slow motion, leaving me to waddle-sprint (a new Olympic event?) to the house, where I realized that I would trail a river behind me if I were to ascend the staircase, and, also, that there was no way that I could walk past my kids - it looked like I had a king-sized pillow jammed into my sodden shorts. So, I had to take refuge in the laundry room while my wife fetched me a new diaper and some shorts from our bedroom. Oh, the hilarity. 

Yesterday was not the best day for sailing - when we headed out in the morning, it was 4 degrees C on the water, warming to a balmy 8 by afternoon. But this was the last hurrah for the boat - sometime in the next 3 months or so, we will be able to commence walking, or even driving, on parts of that lake. So if I wanted one last outing, yesterday was the day. The wind was sufficient to provide for brisk progress, but that also contributed to the chill. We both wore multiple layers, so that helped disguise my diaper, anyway. My friend peed over the side of the boat on two occasions... I did not. But sailing on a small boat (20 feet) requires lots of walking back and forth along the edge of the hull, with the boat heeled over, and splashing up and down, rocking back and forth, etc. Plus leaping to and from docks with ropes in your hands, leaning over the edge to raise and lower bumpers, etc. 

The question that never completely left my mind was, what would I have done, had I fallen in? It's far from unheard of. I'm a good swimmer, I was wearing a lifejacket, and the water temperature was warmer than the air - other than being deeply uncomfortable, such an event wouldn't warrant being called an emergency, more like a mishap. Except that it WOULD have been a diaper emergency... that Megamax I had on would have tripled in size and streamed cold rivulets down my legs for the rest of the trip. It would have soaked anything I sat on - and, we arrived at our distant starting point in his brand new truck. So what in God's name would I have done? It's not like there is any space for privacy on a 20-foot sailboat. There is a cabin, but it's a stooped-over affair only used for storage and to access the motor. I did have another diaper with me, but, no other clothing. 

If the core of good planning is to envision eventualities, and then prepare for them, then I am at a loss. I don't know what I could have done, other than to decline to accompany him, which would be tragic - I love being out on a boat, and boating and diapers go so well together, other than if you fall into the water. Multiple hours with no access to plumbing? No problem. Bring it on.

I suppose I could have brought a complete change of clothing with me, and a towel, and then I could have changed under the deck while stooped over, or seated, like I was doing it in a sports car. And then I could have jammed the 40-lb Megamax into my bag with my wet clothes. But the odds of me getting through all that without anyone realizing that I was in toddler's underpants would be, at best, 50-50. 

All of which is to say, folks, that consigning yourself to a life spent inside taped-on (or pinned-on) underwear, is far from an easy road, and sometimes you have to go live without a safety net, and undertake activities, knowing that there exists at least the ghost of a chance that you might get found out. At least I was wearing a plain white product  - it would be a lot harder to launch into a medical explanation were my newly-exposed diaper festooned with purple unicorns or whatever. 

If you were on a small sailboat with a buddy from work, and you ended up in the drink, once you hauled yourself up onto the deck, what would you do? 

[WetDad]

For 25+ years I had a larger sailboat (43) and I often singlehanded for fun. Of course I wore a diaper, and in the fall I also wore fleece under my foulies. The fall winds were always brisk (F4-6) and I enjoyed the time away from from shore and all the responsibilities of life. I always wore an automatic inflatable life vest and in stronger winds I would clip my harness to keep me on board in case of a misguessed wave. Never fell overboard, but I would have been hard pressed to climb back aboard with a 4 foot freeboard.

[Little Sherri]

Sounds like an awesome sailboat, @WetDad. I love sailing. I haven't owned a boat but I've been fortunate enough to have had a chance to sail with a few people. I spent 10 days on a 43-foot sailboat a few years ago, moving it from Greece to the tip of Spain, where it meets Gibraltar. What an amazing trip. Serious sailing, too - we had storms, lots of marine traffic, lots of tight moorings. 

I'm transplanting the following from another thread, where someone was asking about spending holidays in diapers, once again in deference to my desire to collate as much of this material as I can in one place. Why? I don't know. Maybe it'll make an awful coffee table book one day.....

One thing I really enjoy about having gone 24/7 is spending the holidays in a diaper - it's just super-relaxing and fun. Before I was open about it with my wife, I was always trying to create opportunities for "diaper time" by, say, not joining them for a visit to one of her friends or whatever, because typically the family would be home for about two weeks straight (unless we were travelling) and I would start getting impatient because there were very few opportunities to wear.

Now I can drink wine and lounge in a diaper (under clothes if the kids are home) and watch movies and relax, and not be counting down to when I can next put a diaper on, or when I have to take one off. 

I haven't been given diapers for Christmas yet, but my wife did buy me one-piece pajamas the Christmas after I "came out" to her about wearing diapers. It's a sober grey, nothing really cutesy about it, but I love it anyway - it's the thought that counts. 

As a kid, I never got diapers for Christmas - my diapers were basically like paper towels or cereal or bread - just groceries, not a "gift" for me. I did used to open my presents wearing my overnight diaper, though - I was in WAY too much of a hurry to see what Santa had brought me, to get changed. Eventually, one of my parents would send me to go get dressed for the day, once the presents were open and we'd had breakfast. 

My current, deep dive into "this lifestyle" was sparked at least in part by seeing a picture of myself at around 6 or 7, sitting on the floor by the Christmas tree, wearing a diaper. I had gone for close to 20 years without wearing or thinking about diapers, ever since my step-dad found my stash of homemade cloth diapers when I was in my early teens, and yelled at me about it in front of the family. Within a couple of days of seeing that old picture of myself in my mom's photo album, I had bought myself a package of XL pullups. 

 

[BabyJilly_S]

On 10/1/2021 at 6:01 PM, Little Sherri said:

If you were on a small sailboat with a buddy from work, and you ended up in the drink, once you hauled yourself up onto the deck, what would you do? 

I would have to 'fess up.

I have worn in work now for a few odd days but there have only been three of us in prepping the office space. Not sure if they have noticed. They are nice people so probably wouldn't say.

One of them is one of my best friends so if he did notice and mentioned it, once I played the medical "got bladder issues" card I imagine there would be concern, then a bout of gentle piss taking (lol) and it would fade away to normality and in that traditional British way , never to be mentioned again.

At least that's how I hope it would go, anyhow we may see I guess, cos I ain't stopping  

[Little Sherri]

I was reading another thread here about Halloween and what people recall having done, or what they are doing, for the day. One comment that rang true for me came from someone who lived in the Northern states, and so always had to wear a jacket over their costume; that was and is the Canadian Halloween experience, for sure. Once in a blue moon we get a warm, dry Halloween where the kids can wear just their costumes, but October in most of Canada (West coast excepted) is characterized by temperatures below 10 C, wind, and often, rain or wet snow. So that resulted in a lot of vampires and zombies running around in winter jackets and boots. 

Someone else mused about it being a day where ABDL folk can be themselves a bit, because everyone is dressing up, and going dressed as a baby, so long as it doesn't swerve into the distasteful, wouldn't attract much attention. That had me thinking about what I wanted to be when I went out as a kid, and, one thing I never dared to do, was go as a baby, because I either had a diaper on under my costume, or, I would be putting one on shortly after getting home, so I did NOT want to bring any attention to that, needless to say. 

However, I attended a Halloween party at Rearz two years ago, just before the onset of the pandemic, and about 6 months after I went 24/7, so I wore a diaper to that, though well covered under my "morgue tech" costume. It was quite the experience for a guy still learning to navigate the 24/7 highway; my life was basically about keeping my diaper hidden, and there I was at an ABDL supplier's location, hanging out with a bunch of people who were much more open about their affinity for plastic underpants than I had ever been. The dress code for the party precluded wearing only diapers, but, a lot of people's costumes were little-themed, or, they didn't do a lot to disguise what they were wearing underneath them. I had gone in wearing a slim, medical diaper under jeans, but I had brought a Barnyard with me, in deference to my hosts, and I brought that costume, which primarily consisted of medical scrubs, but I had not committed to wearing them at all. 

Once I got the lay of the land and started to feel a bit more comfortable, and once I understood the security Rearz was imposing with respect to picture taking, I felt comfortable enough to go to the washroom and change over into the "real" diaper, and put my costume on, but stepping out of there still felt a bit like jumping off of a cliff... my diaper felt huge, and the light scrubs did not mute it or offer much camouflage. Plus, the back of it rose pretty high up my back, well above the top of the pants, and while the shirt hung down and covered it when I was standing, I was had to concede that when I sat down, it could possible have seen the light from time to time. 

I was shy and stuck to the sidelines - I didn't (and don't) know very many people from that corner of the world and I hadn't arranged to meet up with anyone. However, I was eventually approached by a lovely young lady, probably 15 years younger than me (she looked like she was in her 20's), wearing a Tinkerbelle outfit, with a short skirt, and tights, over a diaper, and a pacifier clipped to her collar. We started chatting and I quickly relaxed and realized that what I was wearing was entirely unremarkable and wouldn't offend anyone, or attract much attention, in that crowd. I met a couple of people she was with, and hung around for maybe 90 minutes, before heading out. All in all, it was a good experience. 

This Halloween, I will undoubtedly be wearing a diaper, but, it will be well hidden. If times ever go back to "normal", and Rearz stages another event, I would probably at least consider attending it. Have any of you ever attended any ABDL events, or, have you ever "been yourself" under the camouflage of dressing up for Halloween, be that as an AB, DL,  diapered furry, or whatever floats your boat? 

I was reading another thread here about Halloween and what people recall having done, or what they are doing, for the day. One comment that rang true for me came from someone who lived in the Northern states, and so always had to wear a jacket over their costume; that was and is the Canadian Halloween experience, for sure. Once in a blue moon we get a warm, dry Halloween where the kids can wear just their costumes, but October in most of Canada (West coast excepted) is characterized by temperatures below 10 C, wind, and often, rain or wet snow. So that resulted in a lot of vampires and zombies running around in winter jackets and boots. 

Someone else mused about it being a day where ABDL folk can be themselves a bit, because everyone is dressing up, and going dressed as a baby, so long as it doesn't swerve into the distasteful, wouldn't attract much attention. That had me thinking about what I wanted to be when I went out as a kid, and, one thing I never dared to do, was go as a baby, because I either had a diaper on under my costume, or, I would be putting one on shortly after getting home, so I did NOT want to bring any attention to that, needless to say. 

However, I attended a Halloween party at Rearz two years ago, just before the onset of the pandemic, and about 6 months after I went 24/7, so I wore a diaper to that, though well covered under my "morgue tech" costume. It was quite the experience for a guy still learning to navigate the 24/7 highway; my life was basically about keeping my diaper hidden, and there I was at an ABDL supplier's location, hanging out with a bunch of people who were much more open about their affinity for plastic underpants than I had ever been. The dress code for the party precluded wearing only diapers, but, a lot of people's costumes were little-themed, or, they didn't do a lot to disguise what they were wearing underneath them. I had gone in wearing a slim, medical diaper under jeans, but I had brought a Barnyard with me, in deference to my hosts, and I brought that costume, which primarily consisted of medical scrubs, but I had not committed to wearing them at all. 

Once I got the lay of the land and started to feel a bit more comfortable, and once I understood the security Rearz was imposing with respect to picture taking, I felt comfortable enough to go to the washroom and change over into the "real" diaper, and put my costume on, but stepping out of there still felt a bit like jumping off of a cliff... my diaper felt huge, and the light scrubs did not mute it or offer much camouflage. Plus, the back of it rose pretty high up my back, well above the top of the pants, and while the shirt hung down and covered it when I was standing, I was had to concede that when I sat down, it could possible have seen the light from time to time. 

I was shy and stuck to the sidelines - I didn't (and don't) know very many people from that corner of the world and I hadn't arranged to meet up with anyone. However, I was eventually approached by a lovely young lady, probably 15 years younger than me (she looked like she was in her 20's), wearing a Tinkerbelle outfit, with a short skirt, and tights, over a diaper, and a pacifier clipped to her collar. We started chatting and I quickly relaxed and realized that what I was wearing was entirely unremarkable and wouldn't offend anyone, or attract much attention, in that crowd. I met a couple of people she was with, and hung around for maybe 90 minutes, before heading out. All in all, it was a good experience. 

This Halloween, I will undoubtedly be wearing a diaper, but, it will be well hidden. If times ever go back to "normal", and Rearz stages another event, I would probably at least consider attending it. Have any of you ever attended any ABDL events, or, have you ever "been yourself" under the camouflage of dressing up for Halloween, be that as an AB, DL,  diapered furry, or whatever floats your boat? 

[oznl]

I’ve met a couple in our community face-to-face, almost always 1:1 (once, in the USA there were three of us out for a pizza) but it was rare and international travel was part of a prior life.  We were all diapered (I was in the USA so it couldn't really be a nappy) but we were discreet.

There are a small few (who shall remain nameless but are in this place) whom I voice/video chat with from time to time as time zones and solitude permit or even directly met (Australia’s famous “tyranny of distance” is the challenge here - compounded by my wings being clipped and COVID border controls). 

There is an FL guy who runs, or at least RAN a diapered zoom room that I used a few times at the height of the North American pandemic:  that was cool.  Although we were usually on-camera (as bandwidth permitted), in his own words, “it’s not a fashion show” but that was for the best.  None of us were oil-paintings.  Those conversations almost inevitably  drifted away into largely non-diaper conversation (there’s really only so much about unconventional underwear that can be said). I’ve met interesting people this way and learned a lot of stuff.

The “Littles Downunder” shop owner used to run the occasional sausage sizzle.  It was tempting for me to go there but the timing was always awkward (early evening on a Friday).  Frankly I’m also wary of winding up in a cohort of ABDL all young enough to be my kids.  I never want to be that “creepy old guy”.

The gorilla in the room with all this is my beloved.  She would never understand and automatically assume it was some kind of weird orgy: wildly wrong but I know her well enough to know that running the debate would be pointless and end in tears.  This is a matter of profound regret to me.  I need to largely conceal this aspect of myself with her and I am effectively forbidden from sharing it with anybody else (at least face to face).

 

[Little Sherri]

17 hours ago, oznl said:

The gorilla in the room with all this is my beloved.  She would never understand and automatically assume it was some kind of weird orgy: wildly wrong but I know her well enough to know that running the debate would be pointless and end in tears.  This is a matter of profound regret to me.  I need to largely conceal this aspect of myself with her and I am effectively forbidden from sharing it with anybody else (at least face to face).

I worry about this as well. It's one thing for me to be running around in diapers that are generally carefully concealed, (although my beloved has engaged in gaslighting me on whether or not they're utterly invisible recently, but I digress), BUT, it's another thing entirely to head out to the Diaper Club to play some shuffleboard, or, enter the vat of pudding, or whatever she'd imagine would go on. 

 

17 hours ago, oznl said:

Frankly I’m also wary of winding up in a cohort of ABDL all young enough to be my kids.  I never want to be that “creepy old guy”.

This is what I felt like at the Rearz event - a lot of people there were considerably younger than me, and so I didn't approach any of them, and the ice was only really broken when one of them approached me, for precisely the reason you articulated. I used to go to raves as a kid (all night, illegal-from-a-zoning-standpoint techno dance parties in industrial warehouses and such), and there were always a few "old guys" buzzing around the periphery, which, from our perspective as people in our early 20's, meant anyone over 30, basically. There were lots of teenaged girls in tiny dresses dancing like they were possessed, so these guys were viewed with much suspicion.  I don't want to be seen as one of them at the diapered bonfire or poetry reading or marksmanship training. I want to meet people of approximately my own age, and maybe have a beer, no lube required. 

Well, climate realities are pushing me out of my baggy cargo shorts comfort zone. Showing up everywhere in shorts, under a parka, is going to become absurd in the next few weeks, so I had to pull out more of my they-used-to-be-oversized jeans, and get used to wearing diapers under them again. I've ventured out a couple of times already with one of those Tena's my wife bought me on under them, obviously, for very SHORT errands, Tena's being what they are. But last night I had on a Rearz Select (the single-tape-per-side version of their Inspire), when a mid-evening plan was cooked up by some buddies to meet at a pub to discuss an upcoming project at one of our houses. I didn't want to take off that comfy select when it was still in its prime, so, I pulled some jeans on over it, put on a long sweater, rallied my courage, and headed out. I examined myself in the mirror in our front hall on the way to the door... a bit lumpy back there, maybe, but nothing about it screamed "diaper" to me. I could hear the crunch-crunch of the plastic conforming to my movements in my silent hallway, but on the patio at a pub, I new that it would not be discernable. I made a beeline for the car before I changed my mind. 

At the pun, within a few minutes, I forgot about my diaper, which is as it should be. I settled in and joined the conversation and didn't think about what I was wearing again until a couple of the guys excused themselves to use the washroom. By the time I left I felt like I maybe had a little bit of bulk on the radar down there, but it was dark and we all walked off in separate directions, and all told, it was a good proof of concept. If I can wear a Select under those jeans, I can wear a Lil' Monster or other, lighter diaper, with more constraining tabs, confidently. 

When I got home, I was hoping that my wife would still be up, so that she could see that I'd been out in that big plastic diaper, and infer that her campaign to convince me to only wear slim, low-grade medical diapers, out of concern for the noise and the bulk, was failing. But, alas, she had gone to sleep. 

However this morning I put on another select and made coffee and we did a meeting online with our lawyer, all while wearing light athletic shorts that stopped well below the diaper at the back, so, hopefully she took it as a commentary on what I think of the Tena's she gifted to me a few days ago. 

[Little Sherri]

Someone else's thread made me realize that there is perhaps one thing that I haven't talked about here, at least openly. I am copying and pasting over my response to their inquiry on what effect wearing diapers has had on people's sex lives, if any. The responses ran the gamut from "I don't like sex" to "I have wild diaper sex every night before being breastfed and rocked to sleep", but a number of them went along the lines of what I am about to submit for your consideration...

It's been really interesting reading everyone's confessionals here. This is something that I haven't really talked about before, as much as I've blabbed on endlessly about everything else going on in my life. My sex life has kind of come full circle... I grew up as a kid who wore diapers, primarily to bed, and as I got older, I struggled with the feelings I was having about that... I knew that I had started liking to wear them, at least sometimes, but I also knew that liking them was "wrong" and "weird", and that my parents really wanted me out of them, so it was something I had a lot of angst about. I started maturing and becoming a sexual being right about when I stopped needing diapers, but by then they were, I think, inextricably linked to my sexuality - most of what turned me on involved wearing, or imagining wearing diapers. I hadn't thought about girls yet. So, once my parents stopped buying them when I stopped wetting the bed, I started making my own, and sleeping in them, but then my step-father found them and yelled at me in front of my family, and that dumped a bucket of cold water on "this" fascination, provoking a winter that lasted more than 20 years. Meanwhile, I started noticing girls, then dating them, then I got married, and had a couple of kids. Years later, I found a picture of myself wearing a diaper at Christmas in one of my mom's photo albums, and it all came flooding back (pun intended), and I went out and bought some pullups, eventually working my way up to buying ABDL diapers, and wearing them sometimes, then every night, then, 2.5 years ago, I decided to wear them all the time.

So, I had to let my wife in on it, because there was no way I could wear diapers all the time, everywhere, and not eventually get caught, so I wanted "the reveal" to happen on my terms, and not when I got drunk and stumbled around the room and she turned the lights on to the sight of her husband in a big printed diaper. But, concurrent with that trajectory, our intimate life was going down the tubes, anyway. Pregnancy had been hard on my wife, and later, she developed a back condition that made almost everything uncomfortable, and, ironically, mild stress incontinence that she manages with pads, but that made her very self-conscious about "down there", because she never felt clean. And once I started walking around in giant toddler diapers, it was more or less over. She puts up with it but she's not into it, and if my nether-bits are encased in baby powder-smelling plastic, she has zero interest. Meanwhile, I have minimal interest in not being in a diaper. If she asked me to take it off and go shower, I'd do it, but she hasn't asked, and I haven't asked her in ages, after hearing "not tonight" or "my back is too sore" hundreds of times. Joy for me now is wearing a nice diaper around the house, with just a shirt, on days when the kids are out. She rolls her eyes and sometimes cracks jokes but she puts up with it and she's bought me diapers (mostly horrible ones), baby powder, diaper cream and one pair of one-piece pajamas that mean a lot to me because they say, essentially, "I am trying to work with you on this." So, overall, I'm lucky. It could have gone the other way and I could be living in my car and directing 3/4's of my income to my old mailing address. 

[Stroller]

13 hours ago, Little Sherri said:

I worry about this as well. It's one thing for me to be running around in diapers that are generally carefully concealed, (although my beloved has engaged in gaslighting me on whether or not they're utterly invisible recently, but I digress), BUT, it's another thing entirely to head out to the Diaper Club to play some shuffleboard, or, enter the vat of pudding, or whatever she'd imagine would go on. 

I'm a very lucky AB in this respect.  Mummy may be vanilla to her core, but she's OK with me going to events.  She just tells me to 'be good' as I leave.  She knows how much difference it makes to me, and she trusts me not to misbehave (ie not to get involved with anyone else).  I'm starting to make some friends at these events, too.  Some of them are indeed young women of similar age to my own kids, so I'm very careful not to give them the wrong idea of where I'm coming from.  It seems to be working out OK so far.  Because I'm regressing to some extent when I'm there I've usually got more in common with them than with the men in nappies talking about their cars and politics, who are often there as well.

[Little Sherri]

I'm on the precipice of another test of my commitment to the 24/7 road; I've been having virtual doctors appointments with a specialist who has tangential interest in "the equipment", as it relates to blood levels of hormones etc. Once, a few years ago, she wanted to have a look under the hood, which went fine, because I was wearing either grey or dark blue boxer shorts. I've just been informed that my next appointment, coming up in a couple of weeks, will be in person, rather than virtual, and, on top of that, she's asked for a referral to a urologist, an appointment which has not been set up as of yet. 

SO... yeah, she could want a look down there. The last time that happened, there was no going into another room and donning a gown. It was unzip, trousers down to the thighs, a gloved palpitation, and the trousers came back up. Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am. If I go to the appointment wearing a diaper, I will be rolling the dice on a conversation that I have not yet had with any medical professionals. I've gone to appointments wearing a diaper several times, but, either I stayed dressed, I had a chance to undress in private before the examination, or, the circumstances were such that my being in a diaper was outside of the purview of the imaging techs, on the one memorable occasion where I was issued a transparent disposable hospital gown that I did not know was transparent until I was standing in a well-lit waiting area. Luckily I had worn a plan white diaper. Unluckily, white diapers glow under harsh florescent lights. I don't know how I'll handle that the next time around - hopefully by then they will have scrapped the "pandemic protocol" disposable gowns, but otherwise, I'll have to try and find a diaper in light blue, I guess. 

I'm fairly determined not to go buy underwear before this appointment; that would seem like a big step backwards. Although realistically, I could buy some low-end ones and then just toss them after the event, if there is indeed an "event". But that still feels like "cheating" to me... my plan is to face life head on, and diaper on.

But what would that conversation look like? "Why are you wearing a disposable brief (or whatever euphemism she applies)?" "Well, uh, see, for the last few years, I've had sudden, unexpected urgency, and I just feel safer wearing protection." "Hmmm... have you talked to your doctor about this?" .... and now, the question becomes, to mislead or not to mislead. She exchanges notes with my primary care physician. If I say he knows all about it, she may include a note along the lines of "Patient still wearing incontinence protection" or whatever. Or she may ignore it. If I got the other way, and say that, no, I haven't told my doctor, given that she's the one who requested that I see a urologist (for unrelated reasons), I'd say that there is about a 95% chance that she'll sent a note to the urologist about it. 

Although, in any case, I'll have to face down this issue again when I actually do get an appointment to see said urologist. Showing up there in a diaper is pretty much certain to raise all kinds of questions. And what I don't want to do is tie up medical resources for a vanity project. I know why I wear diapers - it's because I wear diapers. But if I say that I wear them because I want to, so leave me alone, will that result in a suggestion that I see a psychiatrist? Sigh. 

All of these problems could be solved by spending $10 at Walmart. OR, going commando, I guess. I suppose I could borrow a pair of my wife's knickers... THOSE probably wouldn't result in ANY questions. Just slightly-raised eyebrows. 

[oznl]

You perch upon the horns of a dilemma to be sure.

I think my strategy here is to avoid dealing with the medical profession on this matter until I absolutely HAVE to and then, to minimize engagement on this matter.

I understand that as patients however, there is huge pressure for us to sublimate our own sense of personal agency before a medical professional.  It is a brave patient that will take it upon themselves to define the scope of a practitioner's remit.  Objectively, I believe we are well within our rights to simply advise “nothing to see here, move along” but subjectively, I know that’s not always easy to do and not all practitioners will quietly “stay in their lane” so to speak.

I’d probably squib it at this stage.  I know I'm good for a couple of hours still and I have my rancid red underpant.  If that wasn’t an option (longer day), I’d probably go for a plain, small pull-up and advise the practitioner that it was there for minor leakage in consequence of urgency, a micro-problem that I’m happy to deal with.

Of course, if I was suddenly hospitalized (this has happened plenty of times before but has settled down over the last few years), my rediscovered ability to wet the bed is likely to prove awkward…  Very, very hard to avoid that cat getting out of the bag.

[Little Sherri]

14 hours ago, oznl said:

I’d probably squib it at this stage.  I know I'm good for a couple of hours still and I have my rancid red underpant.  If that wasn’t an option (longer day), I’d probably go for a plain, small pull-up and advise the practitioner that it was there for minor leakage in consequence of urgency, a micro-problem that I’m happy to deal with.

Of course, if I was suddenly hospitalized (this has happened plenty of times before but has settled down over the last few years), my rediscovered ability to wet the bed is likely to prove awkward…  Very, very hard to avoid that cat getting out of the bag.

Yeah, I could relieve a lot of my stress, and avoid unnecessary situational complexity, by simply buying one pair of boxer shorts. I could wear a diaper all the way there, change in a bathroom, do the appointment, and then put my diaper right back on. Then, I'd also have said underpants on hand for the urology appointment, whenever that happens. If I had to, I could put them in a safe, I guess. Or bury them in the back corner of the yard, whatever it would take for them to not be an easy option in a moment of weakness, kind of like having a bottle of Scotch stashed high in a tree. Although when I had my bag of underpants cached up high in my garage for most of the first 18 months or so of my 24/7 journey, I never did go digging for them just because I suddenly got cold feet about having a damp derrière in some upcoming situation. So, realistically, I've proven my fealty to my Pampers. Just because there is a rope in the truck, that doesn't mean I won't free-climb today. Having thrown my bag of big boy underpants out almost a year ago, I have adequately proven my determination, to myself. 

There are a couple of interesting considerations being raised by these appointments, though. First of all, my wife is aware of the urology appointment, because I'm waiting for a referral by mail. In this day and age, I have no idea why an envelope must physically travel from some office, to my hands, in order for me arrive at a medical office weeks or months hence. My wife is the Bringer of the Mail, so, I had to give her a heads-up that I was expecting something from someone, lest it be misdirected. She asked what it was about, and I said "I'm getting referred to a urologist.", and she said "It's about time, isn't it?" 

This made me very curious. I left the comment un-probed, but, it raises the question once again... what exactly does she think is going on here? Perhaps it comes down to a chicken-and-egg conundrum? Does she think that I started experiencing urinary issues, and then I leaned into it, deciding that if I'm going to be wearing protective underpants, then they might as well be big plastic ones festooned with colourful characters? And what of the pacifiers? (Although, as I've said a few times before, she actually appreciates those, as they eliminate noises I allegedly make with my teeth when I sleep, and yes, I already had a dental mouth guard. other than the paci's, I don't own any "AB" gear that is unrelated to diapers, unless black onesie t-shirts count as AB gear). 

Also, recall that, in the before times, I treated my diapers like they were radioactive, and had ingenious hiding places and disposal protocols for them, lest I be called upon to explain their presence. Then, to use a Pol Pot analogy (far too few of those being thrown around these days), I went back to year zero, eradicated all traces of Joe Boxer from my wardrobe, and gleefully stuffed a drawer with colourful plastic rectangles, ready for a bright and hopeful future as a diaper-naut. Given that, what would her finding a pair of underwear within the laundry system portend, in her mind? I'm not sure that's a door I want to open, now that evidence suggests she seems to have convinced herself that my waddling about in giant toddler diapers is nothing other than a pragmatic response to a plumbing problem. So, if I do go buy underwear again, it seems that I will have to keep THEM stuffed up with the off-season tires, in the garage. Or in the aforementioned tree, or shallow grave. My,  how the worm has turned.

[oznl]

15 hours ago, Little Sherri said:

Does she think that I started experiencing urinary issues, and then I leaned into it, deciding that if I'm going to be wearing protective underpants, then they might as well be big plastic ones festooned with colourful characters?

Well, potentially yes.

As I recall, you've never actually discussed your motivations for doing this with her.

Obviously (and optimally) I'm well outside your marital bubble here but consider applying the principle of Occam's razor to a middle aged male who has started wearing diapers.  A urological explanation (especially since you have a "past" here) is the one that requires the fewest assumptions from an observer unacquainted with the (invisible) psychological overlay.

Counter to this is that I'm slightly surprised at what seems like an almost studied lack of curiosity on her part as to what is going on with you.

ps: Life is a journey of learning.  I've just now realised that Canadians also spell "colour" correctly as in "colourful".  Must be a monarchy thing  ?

[Stroller]

16 hours ago, Little Sherri said:

So, if I do go buy underwear again, it seems that I will have to keep THEM stuffed up with the off-season tires, in the garage.

The time for me to own up at the doctors' surgery hasn't arrived yet, but I'm pretty sure I'll be heading there in a nappy & letting them know I'm dependent on them when the time comes.  Now I've come this far I don't think I could face the step backwards.  Of course that's easy to say at the moment, but I'm usually pretty good at following things through when they really matter.  And anyway, I've not tried to stop a flow starting, or to stop one once it's started, in three years now.  I've no idea how dependent I am, so there's no way I could head to the surgery with no protection.

These medics will just have to be big boys and girls and face it sensibly, won't they?

[Little Sherri]

On 10/9/2021 at 1:51 AM, oznl said:

Counter to this is that I'm slightly surprised at what seems like an almost studied lack of curiosity on her part as to what is going on with you.

I agree. It's almost like finding a growing black mole on the back of your elbow, and deciding "It's nothing", and not bringing it up the next seven times you go to the doctor. "I don't want to know..." 

You're right, we spell neighbour and colour and grey correctly, despite most software's insistence on correcting over to the "world's largest economy" spelling, instead of the "history's most effective navy" spelling. 

@Stroller, I hope to follow in your footsteps at some point, but I'm not sure if I'm there yet. I had decided to wait or my doctor to retire, and then to start up with a new one, and tell him or her at that point that I've been wearing nappies for years, nothing to see here. However, fate my be forcing my hand. 

I had an "autopilot" experience today that was slightly exhilarating... I am cutting my lawn a lot now, because it's been raining and cool, which the grass seems to enjoy, and also, it does a great job of cutting down on the number of leaves I will have to bag, since the tractor very effectively turns leaves to dust, if they aren't too wet. So when I see a window, I go. Today offered such a window. 

I hit the tractor and finished the big easy bits, and was then concentrating on making tight turns around decorative plants that my wife favours (there's another "ou word", @oznl...), and generally not paying attention to anything else but driving the tractor, which, as you can imagine, is a big, loud, vibrating machine with no suspension that jars and shakes the operator and subjects them to noxious gasses. Well, when I was done, I stepped off... and noted that my diaper was NOTABLY wetter than when I had hopped on, 90 minutes before. I was paying closer-than-usual attention to its status because my in-laws are here this weekend and I don't want to leak or get to "bulgy" around them. 

So, apparently while I was cutting the grass, I wet my diaper a fair bit, without any memory of having done so. Is this incontinence, or just inattention? Surly, the latter. But, it was interesting, slightly disconcerting, and somewhat pleasant. 

[oznl]

11 hours ago, Little Sherri said:

So, apparently while I was cutting the grass, I wet my diaper a fair bit, without any memory of having done so. Is this incontinence, or just inattention? Surly, the latter. But, it was interesting, slightly disconcerting, and somewhat pleasant. 

As unexciting as it may sound, I suspect that it is merely forgetfulness born out of long, long habituation.  We are VERY good at peeing in our pants by now and for us, it's is utterly normal and unremarkable.  Furthermore, our lack of practicing continence has relegated diaper wetting incidents down from two or three epic events (with associated leakage) for a given diaper, to dozens of semi-automatic micro-choices that are unmemorable.

My party trick is getting to a diaper change and assuming I don’t really need it (I do).

I can't help wondering that if (after the novelty of being undiapered had worn off), I might accidentally wet my pants because I'd forget NOT to sometimes.

[Little Sherri]

I have further evidence that my subconscious may now occasionally be "trying" to wet the bed for me... to wit, I was awakened from a dream last night by the incongruity between the dream and reality. In the dream, I had to pee really badly, and I was trying really hard to pee, but not getting any results. At some point, my "this doesn't make any sense" alarm went off, yanking me back from dreamland, where I discovered that I did in fact really have to pee... and had been trying to do so, but there was a kink in the plumbing, basically. It's actually good that events didn't play out unimpeded, because I had a trajectory issue as well - "I" was pointed right up at the waistband of my diaper, a Bambino Teddy. The Teddy has a fairly high rise at the front, but I'd been rolling around in it for hours and its fit and positioning were no longer optimal. Had I attempted to use brute force to get past the obstruction, I probably would have been changing the bedding, perhaps provoking the ire of my beloved. If she has to put up with sharing a bed with someone in diapers, shouldn't that at least come with a dryness guarantee? 

It was interesting that my automated services had at least tried to take care of the rising internal water levels themselves, before breaking into the dream theater to get the attention of the executive branch. This is perhaps one situation where female plumbing is advantageous - there are no kinks, and you're never pointed the wrong way.

I've been debating the pros and cons of showing up for an upcoming doctors appointment in a medical-grade diaper, versus buying underwear and ducking all the possible complications. I *think* I've decided to just go for it. I'm not sure why, but I really don't want to buy underwear again. This is a strange aversion, I know. If I ever land in the hospital again, I plan to wear diapers, and you never really know when that might happen, although thankfully there haven't been any warning shots from my physiology lately. But, I will need to face this down sooner or later. For the appointment, there's about a 50% chance that no in-trouser work will be required, and, if there are any subterranean excursions, then there is about a 50% chance that I'll have an opportunity to either remove the diaper, or pull it down with my pants, escaping notice - I'll wear one of the Prevail Perfit diapers with stretchy wings that more or less fit like a pullup once they've been fastened on. 

If I get asked about it, then I'm going to try to stammer through the lines I've been rehearsing in my head for such an occasion:  "Yeah, sometimes I experience sudden urgency - it's always been an issue for me, ever since I was a kid. With Covid, you never know if a public washroom is going to be open, capacity-limited, or what. So, I just feel more confident if I wear backup protection. How about the weather these days?" 

Since I'm discussing odds, I'd say that there is also about a 50% chance that I'll blink and just buy some boxers, or employ running shorts as pseudo-boxers. But my intention right now is to go in a diaper, and navigate whatever waters I find myself in. Perhaps this string will fall silent for three weeks, and then I'll reappear, to discuss what it's like to be involuntarily committed for a psychiatric-focused "vacation". But given the strained resources of a publicly-funded  health system, the odds are good that the response I get will be a collective exasperated shrug. They have bigger fish to fry, and realistically, diaper rash is the biggest risk factor I'm facing, from a physiology perspective. 

[Stroller]

1 hour ago, Little Sherri said:

If she has to put up with sharing a bed with someone in diapers, shouldn't that at least come with a dryness guarantee?

Er, not one that's worth anything, I wouldn't think.  I've only wet the bed once since I've been in nappies at night, and my wife just shrugged it off & we changed the sheets in the morning.  She's wet the bed more often than I have...

[BabyJilly_S]

Good luck with the doc visit if you decide to go for it