Strange days indeed - a 24 x 7 experiment

[oznl]

Off into week 6.  I’ve noticed that I’m having to think more about wetting this week than last week – possibly related to some work stress.  This morning I was nearly at the office sitting in my car when I suddenly realized that my day-nappy which I had put on nearly an hour ago was still dry.  Since wearing 24x7, this was NOT normal for me!  Sitting at my desk later, I seemed to have re-entered “the zone”, dribbling periodically as though catheterized without any specific muscular command but as soon as I move I will fall out of that zone.   I have noticed that my improved ability not to “clench” at the first sign of an empty bladder has resulted in urination not so much ceasing but petering out with a fair degree of ongoing dribbling.

My BetterDry 24 are continuing to manage the load from my 0700 – 1600 office shift although they can be pretty puffy and heavy by the end of the day! 

In an inversion of the accepted wisdom behind learned incontinence, I’m seeing more evidence of changes at nighttime than I am during the day.  I’m certain that I’m waking to wet but my recollection of these events continues to get hazier and more erratic.  Yesterday morning, I woke around 5am and felt I needed to pee.  The next thing it was 5:15am.  Remembering I was supposed to pee, I tried to release my bladder only to realize it was already empty!  I suppose I in fact HAD peed back at 5am but somehow forgot about it falling back into a heavy doze.  I could remember deciding to pee but I had zero memory of actually starting or finishing!

As I am mostly in disposables at night (although insured by cloth covers), I am vulnerable to leaking if wetting on my side.  My subconscious seems to be managing this for me and I’m finding myself repeatedly waking up laying on my back which has been bad news for my CPAP machine that does its best to inflate me like a balloon to keep my airway open when I'm on my back.

I have become *extremely* comfortable with my night nappies.  The primary inconveniences of my day nappies (heat, mobility restriction, concerns about leaks, smells or discovery) are negated at night and my ageing body’s deteriorating ability to make it through the night without pee urges are simply rendered irrelevant as I just go in my nappy immediately the need is sensed.

Thinking about the exit strategy I will probably require in a month or so time, I don’t think I dare simply remove my night nappy “cold turkey” at this point.  The same degree of wakefulness and nappy-security-checking that used to occur with an “in-bed-pee” is gone now.    It’s now simply stir, pee, sleep.  I will probably just wear a nappy to bed with the intent of not using it and see how that goes for me.

I really am starting to miss the sensation of wetness from my nappy area.  Perhaps this is due to many weeks of habituation.  I can feel myself urinating but the feeling down there is only one of a fleeting painless heat.  Even in my cloth nappies, I don’t seem to perceive “wet” anymore.  I’m not sure how I feel about this as I used to quite like that sensation.

On the domestic front, things seem to have settled down into a kind of new normal.  My nappies have been neither mentioned nor discussed for a week or so and life seems to be going on.

[oznl]

On 1/31/2019 at 5:41 AM, Newbee said:

Hi oznl

lucky for that you haven’t had nappy rash I have because the heat here in NSW has been very hot and I work in hot kitchens also I do a lot of walking in my job so the friction has caused nappy rash but luckily I have a very understanding husband who changes me and applies cream when needed I will add that I have no choice but to wear 24/7. Your partner is right your work colleagues would have noticed the bulk of betterdry I won’t wear them to work as they are too bulky but I do wear them at nighttime I do love them. I really hope that your partner does come to accept you wearing nappies 24/7 even if she doesn’t agree with it.

i wish you all the luck

As a regular traveller to Sydney, yes, NSW has been VERY hot this summer.  I think one of the differences between QLD and NSW however is that in QLD, being tropical or subtropical, there is just no letup in the heat.  It will "cool down" in April...  A bit...  I've found the absence of "relief" days when you wear nappies all the time to be a little tough to be honest.

I came close to a friction rash earlier this week when I had to walk half a dozen blocks from my car to an appointment and then back whilst in a wet nappy.  The problem seemed to be the elastics on my PUL pants rather than the nappy itself but some cream afterwards seemed to head things off.

For the discretion thing, I'm heavy-set and tall.  This, dark pants and a habit of spending most of my working day seated at a desk has I think kept me from being too obvious.  Sure, if you knew exactly what to look for you'd see it but that would be the case for nearly anything.  The challenge I have is that anything less than a BetterDry would necessitate changing at some pint during the day.  I've been as observant as I can be and I haven't noticed any glances or lingering looks and I can honestly say that in my day to day interactions with co-workers, I'm just not paying attention to that part of the anatomy (and nor should I  ? )

Thank you for the luck.  It does seem that my partner is slowly getting used to a "new normal" although she'll get a holiday from it for at least some of March.

[Happilynappied]

An interesting topic, and well done for reaching 6 weeks, i managed a 3 week stint at 24/7 last year, which was a steep learning curve for me, i was mostly in cloth nappies, which requires more work and planning than disposables. That said i did enjoy the experience and was surprised how easy i got into using nappies, to the  point it felt normal, but i'v been in nappies at night for over a couple of years. Once i get more organised with the logistics of wearing 24/7 i will be having another go,and see how far i can go, maybe 5 or 6 weeks.

[oznl]

3 hours ago, Happilynappied said:

An interesting topic, and well done for reaching 6 weeks, i managed a 3 week stint at 24/7 last year, which was a steep learning curve for me, i was mostly in cloth nappies, which requires more work and planning than disposables. That said i did enjoy the experience and was surprised how easy i got into using nappies, to the  point it felt normal, but i'v been in nappies at night for over a couple of years. Once i get more organised with the logistics of wearing 24/7 i will be having another go,and see how far i can go, maybe 5 or 6 weeks.

Well congratulations on three weeks of cloth nappies: I don't need to imagine how much work and planning that would require!  Cloth is my preference and I spend two days per week in them.  Just that creates a mountain of washing but my wife vastly prefers me to use disposables due to odor (she can smell a wet cloth nappy) and laundry (even though I manage this - she doesn't like all the gear laying around and frets about the neighbors seeing nappies on the line).

Unfortunately, the sheer practicality of disposable nappies is overwhelming but at night, wearing them with my double-terry lined waterproofs makes them look (and to a fair extent, feel) like cloth nappies so I'm actually happy with them at night.  The distinctive "wet nappy" smell at work would be an insta-fail in my book and I can't risk it.

You say you've been in nappies at night over a couple of years.  I'd be very interested to hear if that has resulted in any nocturnal continence issues.  My day control remains strong (only 6 weeks in, unsurprising) but nights are looking like they *might* become involuntarily damp if I persist with this for another month (as I am currently planning to do).

I'm not sure how much recovery time I should plan for before leaving O/S on a (nappy free) trip in mid March.  I don't want any "incidents" on the plane or in hotel beds!  If anybody else with experience on this topic wants to chime in, all inputs gratefully considered...

[Stroller]

9 hours ago, oznl said:

Well congratulations on three weeks of cloth nappies: I don't need to imagine how much work and planning that would require!

I've been in cloth nappies for 4 months now: all day every day, and nights as well on the odd occasions that Mummy goes away, and wearing disposables when I'm away & have no access to a washing machine.  I haven't found it as difficult as I thought it might be.  It took quite a bit of time to sort out which nappies worked best for me, but I got most of that sorted out before I went full-time.  It's easy for me, mainly because I'm retired so I don't have to worry about what happens when I'm at work.  Also, Mummy has accepted me in nappies, so I don't have to hide stuff from her.  It was a bit trickier when the kids were home from college over Christmas, but not too difficult.  There's a bucket in the bathroom, another in the outhouse, and when both are full (every 2 days) they go in the wash, then the tumbledrier.  I like to air them for a bit after this, but I don't have to.  When the kids are around, the buckets are hidden away in the outhouse, & I smuggle wet nappies out there in a binbag as & when I can.  I've got a hidden cupboard under the bath to make that easier.  And the kids are never up in the early morning so I can do the wash overnight & put the clean nappies away safely enough in the morning.

So: planning.  The cupboard in the bathroom was key to making this work.  I built it in last year when I needed to repair the side of the bath in any case.  And the second thing was easing my way into wearing cloth full-time gradually, which I did over last spring & summer.

Day to day work.  Not much really, if you don't mind doing the washing.  I do all the washing anyway, as I'm the one at home.

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

I am not sure why I have never responded to this post as I completely understand exactly what you are going through.  I like you made the decision that despite my wife's wishes I was going to wear diapers permanently as well.  She accepted that choice but has never really fully embraced my need to be padded.  I know all about the scoffs and looks when your diaper smells or is crinkling.  After two years of being in diapers they have become as normal as underwear for me.  There is really not much said about them and we both realize I need them and will be in them the rest of my life.

She does participate sometimes changing my diaper and so forth.  Tonight I will get the great privilege of her permitting to hump my diaper in front of her which I really enjoy doing.  I understand it is not her thing and am very thankful she accepts my need for diapers.

[oznl]

12 hours ago, Stroller said:

IIt's easy for me, mainly because I'm retired so I don't have to worry about what happens when I'm at work.

LOL and that's a big part of it Stroller.  If I was retired, this would be orders of magnitude easier.  With time and space, I could manage cloth nappies a lot better.

6 hours ago, MarkSmith said:

I am not sure why I have never responded to this post as I completely understand exactly what you are going through.  I like you made the decision that despite my wife's wishes I was going to wear diapers permanently as well.  She accepted that choice but has never really fully embraced my need to be padded.  I know all about the scoffs and looks when your diaper smells or is crinkling.  After two years of being in diapers they have become as normal as underwear for me.  There is really not much said about them and we both realize I need them and will be in them the rest of my life. 

No problems on the non-response although I’ve been slightly puzzled by the general lack of comment despite what seems to be a very large number viewing these posts.  Maybe it’s something about my writing style that discourages discussion?

I don’t think I will be permanently in diapers – yet…  I did this to find out for myself if my escalating pattern of obsessive thoughts about diaper wearing would resolve itself with some 24x7 experience or if I was indeed, innately fixated on 24x7 use.  It does appear to be the latter.  Despite the heat, humidity and various petty inconveniences (yesterday, I felt a rivulet of pee run down my right leg which was more than an annoyance because I was in a shopping mall!), it does seem that 24x7 is where I want to be.

My "crash kit" (a bag containing spare pants and nappies) lives in my car now...

At some point in early March, I’m going to have to come out of diapers.  My fantasy brain is toying with going straight back into them come early April upon my return to Australia.  My sensible brain is telling me that Stroller’s plan is the better one and I need to put this back into a mental box under the bed until retirement (or as a white male 50-something, the more likely retrenchment followed by unemployability followed by domestic stress from a family that expects a diaper-free breadwinner).

 

[oznl]

And I am into week 7.  Whilst far from embracing my current choice in underwear, it seems that my partner is starting to forget sometimes about what I am wearing and as far as possible, I try not to remind her.  There have still been some occasional sighs, mournful looks with the famous response to enquiries as to what might be wrong of “nothing!” (clue: this is incorrect).

From an adaptation to nappies standpoint, I seem to have hit something of a plateau.  There really isn’t much discernible from week 6.  It is possible that it is getting easier for me to get into my “dribble zone” and stay there, especially when seated at the office but it remains entirely voluntarily and if I don’t consciously put myself in that mode, it just won’t happen.  It’s also a fragile mode and many things can disturb it but when I’m there, it’s a near continuous dripping.

There are also things that will distract me (mainly people) and I will forget to let myself pee.

It’s perhaps more common that dribbles happen that do not include the tingling at the tip of my willy that was normally a characteristic of peeing.  I can feel warm fluid coming out but that is all.  Also, I currently have a bit of a cough, a hangover from a cold a few weeks back.  I’ve noticed that in the dribble-zone, coughs produce warm squirts in my nappy quite involuntarily although I could choose to clench and shut that down.

I was reading about the physiology of peeing: it turns out to be quite complicated.  I was hoping to be able to map what I was experiencing back to a specific “thing” but it’s not that easy.  I suspect the “pee” sensations I feel from down there are in fact my detrusor muscle contracting where I really need it to remain in a relaxed state.  Even the dribbles can be accompanied by this sensation.

On Wednesday I nearly drowned a BetterDry at work which was something of a dangerous feat.  I’d put it on at around 6:30am and largely forgotten about it.  By 4pm (gym time), I stood up and noticed just how heavy it was.  I'd been sitting nearly all day.  A peril of an office job where one is online near constantly.   I’d been hydrating quite a bit due to heat but was in an air-conditioned office.  I’d been in the dribble zone for a very long time, immersed in email and online meetings.  When I got to the gym bathroom, the BetterDry was wet to within 2” of the rear waistband and fell off me like a dead cat.

Next week includes a challenge:  I have an interstate trip.  I plan to carry on with nappies right through this trip.  Although I have worn nappies on a trip before, I did cheat and fly down without them.  This time I will just be getting up VERY early in the morning followed by a quick rinse, a nappy change and off to the airport.  It’s going to have to be a BetterDry because I will not get an opportunity to change for at least 12 hours after putting it on.  I will also be challenged on day 2 – somehow I need to orchestrate a nappy change between my 0700 start and my 1900 flight home whilst at a conference with a wall-to-wall agenda and limited privacy, surrounded by colleagues.

[Newbee]

Hi onzl,

goodluck with your interstate trip I hope all goes well. You might want to try and find a disabled toilet to change into as I found they offer the most privacy.

[Bettypooh]

I don't know the setup, but perhaps you can change at a restaurant during a meal. Or intentionally forget a needed item in your hotel room. Or similarly discover a need for a trip to the pharmacy (do you call them "Chemists" like the UK does?) for cough medicine or something plausible like that, then change during that process. If there's positively no way to do a change then use a stuffer at the start which can be removed and dumped without the need to bring anything into the bathroom. And do consider which might be worse- the risk of problems doing a change or the certainty of a problem should your diaper leak?

Not too long ago I was stuck living with a co-worker on a distant job, and with me providing our transportation there was no way I could see to manage private changes. We were working on vacant apartments in an otherwise populated community with people all around constantly. I had to make my diaper changes happen on-scene as chances presented themselves wherever we were, once even changing behind the community dumpster (tip) as I took the trash out very early one morning. Those changes were never stretched and sometimes had to be an hour or more earlier than usual just because I knew it might be my only chance for the next several hours. I found discreet disposal was my biggest problem and sometimes my suitcase held a couple double-bagged and ziplocked used diapers until I could dump them discretely.

When you wear and use diapers 24/7 you will learn to be ready to take advantage of the situation quickly whenever a chance to change occurs, and you'll learn ways of arranging privacy for changing and disposal without drawing undue attention to yourself simply because you now have to.

Bettypooh

[Greybird]

Hi Oznl, apologies for not contributing more to your postings. It is a subject many of us are dealing/have dealt with. For me it was about convincing myself as much as getting past the wife! A war of attrition! I came to it from the bedwetting angle which was genuine, well maybe exacerbated a little, but then to actually be able to say to said wife, 'I really, really want to wear nappies for the rest of my life' was a bit of a long shot. Rather I introduced them gradually over a period of time. As I got more comfortable with then so did lovely wife. I was reflecting on this only this morning. I came from the to the bedroom and put on my nappy and plastic pants such that she could see me in full view in the mirror. I paraded around the room for another five minutes before finding a t-shirt and another five before putting on the shorts. Nothing was said as it is well normalised. 

When I started making my own nappies they were white and a bit clinical and I wanted to introduce a bit of childishness to them so I did  these are now the norm, indeed she recently mentioned that she liked the ones with 'helicopters and planes'.  So I am now considering removing all evidence of big boy underwear from the wardrobe. 

Patience is vital, you might show her articles about nappies on adults and talk to her about how they make you feel. It took me a very long while to feel comfortable, and I'm not sure I am yet. But we have reached a milestone. We were driving passed a toy shop recently and I mentioned it, she said, in a slightly motherly way "would you like to go and look in the toy shop." Stupidly, because I am not entirely comfortable about it, I said "no" but next time I will say, yes. 

I absolutely understand the obsessive nature of this nappy desire, I has followed me for over 60 years! But I got there. All the inconvenience, letting the doctor know, working out the best nappy for each eventuality, where are the best changing rooms and when is the best time to change before that meeting!  I am retired now but my work was in advertising and I have sat I meetings and castings with some very beautiful women and I am in a nappy! Took me a long time to rationalise that one.

The one line I have not crossed   ...  yet, and that is showing her sites like this one, but I hope to one day, then I will know that the Greybird toddler has been fully accepted  and understood. Keep going with the episodes, they are very interesting and I am anxious to know how you get on in March?

Stay wet and warm  Greybird

 

 

[oznl]

Well it seems I may have spoken too soon with respect to my nappy wearing becoming more tolerated by my partner.

Yesterday we were going to friends (her friends really) for dinner.  That morning, she asked me NOT to wear a nappy there.  I declined, but reassured her that I would forego comfort for discretion: a thin nappy under fixing pants under dark pants and, in the gothic gloom of these people's 1970s house, I very much doubted that any visual cues could be spotted even if one was looking for them.

She wanted to know why so I told her.  Firstly, I believed that the re-introduction of controls from her around when and where I might be in nappies was in my opinion, likely to be the thin end of a wedge.  Before long, we would be back on course with her attempting to squeeze nappies out of my life.  Secondly, I had been wearing and using nappies for approaching two months and a "cold turkey" withdrawal was likely to be uncomfortable for me and I'd quite possibly be attracting more attention than I otherwise would by disappearing to the bathroom every 30 minutes (limited experimentation suggests urgency is a thing now).

Of course she was immediately horrified and accused me of "damaging yourself" and "causing incontinence" (mmm, that *might* be true but I chose not to engage on this point).  She then went on to describe how "sick" I was.  Ah, the support.

She then started quizzing me about my business trip this week.  She seemed especially concerned that the chambermaid at the hotel I was staying out might find out (I don't know why - I would be more concerned about upper management).  I reassured her that I bagged and managed my own garbage on that score.

I then received more unsolicited advice about how "f#$ed" and "sick" it all was.

I remained strangely calm and aloof from all of this.  I wasn't upset at all and it was never a fight.  I reminded her of my status as an autonomous adult, of my efforts to avoid her inconvenience or embarrassment and again, I stated that although I hoped she would remain, if she felt that she could not tolerate this then we should amicably separate because I would not be living my remaining life inside her psychological strait-jacket.   At this she again retreated rapidly.  I really detest having my finger on the "nuke" button of a 30 year relationship but I will push it if I have to.  The more I get into this, the more clarity I am seeing things with.

She professes concern for my health but was deeply relieved that I told her I did NOT plan to discuss this with my GP at an upcoming checkup (I can forgo nappies for the 45m this will take) which reinforces my belief that concerns for ME are NOT her prime motivation.  I would have thought if she truly was concerned about my mental health, she would want the GP to know.

The evening went off without a hitch of course.  I am quite confident that my nappy was all but invisible and nobody suspected a thing.  The weather was hot and humid and even after 5 hours sitting around drinking, I was no more than a little damp and changed into my night nappies upon returning home more out of a sense of ritual than need.  I'm still in my night nappy now, 11 hours after putting it on.  It seems no matter how much I drink, it all just dissipates in sweat.  I mowed the lawn this morning and my night nappy was the driest garment I was wearing by the end.

She has calmed down again today.

[Newbee]

Hi onzl,

im sorry to hear that your and you partner had a disagreement, 30 years is a long time to be together, have you explained to your partner what wearing nappies really means to you and how it makes you feel and reassure said partner that you are not replacing said partner with nappies. My suggestion would be just keep communicating with each other.

[ozziebee]

I tend to find that drinkingg sessions for me end up hitting me and my nappies about 24-48 hours later, overnight soaking them to the point of leaks into my nappy cover and bed. 

YMMV if it was a good drinking session!

[oznl]

30 minutes ago, Newbee said:

Hi onzl,

im sorry to hear that your and you partner had a disagreement, 30 years is a long time to be together, have you explained to your partner what wearing nappies really means to you and how it makes you feel and reassure said partner that you are not replacing said partner with nappies. My suggestion would be just keep communicating with each other.

Yes I have.  She has known about the nappies for all 30 years and used to be much more tolerant.  The pattern we fell into was that the more I pushed them to the corner of my life to make things easier for her, the more territory she expected.  I was down to one "tolerated" night per week and she had her gun sights trained on that too I suspect.

I sincerely hope our relationship survives and I kind of suspect it will but, if push comes to shove, a relationship that is predicated on one sublimating themselves entirely for the other's preference with no room for tolerance just isn't a relationship I'd want anymore.

34 minutes ago, ozziebee said:

I tend to find that drinkingg sessions for me end up hitting me and my nappies about 24-48 hours later, overnight soaking them to the point of leaks into my nappy cover and bed. 

YMMV if it was a good drinking session!

LOL - I've seen that 24 hour thing happen to me after a Sunday night session with friends.  I'm not sure what the physiology is - it might be the range of salty snacks that almost inevitably goes along with craft beers and talking BS.  I wake up Monday morning with my night nappy little more than damp and by late afternoon at the office in my BetterDry, it's like I'm wearing a sheep down there!

 

[Newbee]

6 minutes ago, oznl said:

Yes I have.  She has known about the nappies for all 30 years and used to be much more tolerant.  The pattern we fell into was that the more I pushed them to the corner of my life to make things easier for her, the more territory she expected.  I was down to one "tolerated" night per week and she had her gun sights trained on that too I suspect.

I sincerely hope our relationship survives and I kind of suspect it will but, if push comes to shove, a relationship that is predicated on one sublimating themselves entirely for the other's preference with no room for tolerance just isn't a relationship I'd want anymore.

A relationship is give and take it seems to me that you have done everything to make her happy regarding your nappy wearing well there comes a time when you have to be happy too. I’m sure you will both work it out. Just a question and feel free to not answer it but is it your goal to wear 24/7 permanently?

[oznl]

1 hour ago, Newbee said:

Just a question and feel free to not answer it but is it your goal to wear 24/7 permanently?

I really don't know...  I started this 24x7 "experiment" to find out. 

So far, it looks like it this IS what I want but the practicality challenges are significant and this, in conjunction with the marked non-support from my partner may prove overwhelming for me right now.  I have to stop in a few weeks for a while.  At this stage I would like very much to resume upon my return to Australia.

 

[Newbee]

3 hours ago, oznl said:

I really don't know...  I started this 24x7 "experiment" to find out. 

So far, it looks like it this IS what I want but the practicality challenges are significant and this, in conjunction with the marked non-support from my partner may prove overwhelming for me right now.  I have to stop in a few weeks for a while.  At this stage I would like very much to resume upon my return to Australia.

 

Hi onzl,

even though it will be a forced stop for a few weeks I think it will give you more of an idea if 24/7 is really what you want. I really hope that your partner does get use to it and gives you more support.

[Bettypooh]

I once worked with a man who madly loved his wife and she madly loved him too. I later discovered that my Mom had worked with his wife, and she also told the same story so I can only presume it was true. Every time they talked, if it took more than a few words to respond an argument would break out which both of them hated having happen. So they simply avoided conversing to where a simple 'yes' or 'no' answer would be sufficient. Anything which needed further discussion was done by leaving notes for each other to read and respond to. That eliminated the arguments so that's how they lived together happily for over 40 years. When two people truly and deeply love each other they will find a way to make the relationship work. But both have to agree to the method and both have to do things only that way or it's not going to work.

Perhaps the upcoming "time off" will ease your need to wear constantly and that might be enough to keep your spouse on board. It doesn't seem to me like she's going to increase her own tolerance for you being constantly in diapers but it's still possible. The only certainty here is that if an agreement cannot be reached where each is happy enough to keep the relationship going, then it will end, at least in it's current form. There may be ways like my example above that can keep things going even if the rest of the world might think the method is crazy but what the rest of the world thinks doesn't matter here, and if there is to be any hope some satisfactory solution must be found that both can live with. I never give up hope and I never give up trying, but I know my own limits and as hard as it is to see love lost I will leave when my limits are reached. I lost a lot when I left my last relationship but had I not left I wouldn't be here now. I'm still not certain that it was worth it but I am alive, and that means there is some hope left that someday I won't be alone any more.

So give it your best shot and try anything that might work no matter how crazy it seems, but don't be pushed out of life or hope over it. Whatever else happens you must go on toward your bliss whether she's there with you or not. I hope you can find your bliss together somehow.

Bettypooh

 L

[oznl]

In my 8^th week now and Tuesday marked the first ever interstate business trip I’ve done as a 24x7 nappy wearer – no cheating.  I’ve worn nappies on trips before but usually this happened after flights.  Not this time.  Not much room left in my travel bag either after nappies and associated infrastructure although I suspect I took too much after spending too much time mentally wandering down “what if” street.

I had to move my alarm time from an already-intimidating 3:45am even earlier to accommodate the extra tasks of a quick wash and a nappy change before leaving home for the airport and a 6am flight.

My weapon of choice was a BetterDry 24/7 under Gary PUL pants (for sheer cruise range) but I wore a compression stocking over the top and beneath my dress pants to assist with visual discretion.  I was only the tiniest bit damp due to a dribble or two by the time I got to the airport but as Australian domestic flights do not use body scanners, I expected (and encountered) no issues through security.

The flight down to Sydney was delayed (as usual) but I made it to our team conference venue in the CBD only a couple of minutes late to find most locals drinking coffee and chatting and a number of other interstate attendees also caught up in air traffic delays.

A quick scout of the meeting venue showed it to offer bleak prospects for the incontinent.  The oh-so-fashionable bathroom included toilet stalls narrow enough to be challenging for conventional use and the sole rubbish receptacle was a tiny mail-box style slot in a gleaming stainless-steel plate alongside the ubiquitous Dyson hand dryers.  There was an adjacent disabled/uni-sex toilet but it was inexplicably locked for the entire two days of the conference (I suspect our company had re-purposed it as a storeroom).  The BetterDry would just have to go the distance.

Reluctantly, I restricted fluids but at least opted to keep my sphincter open as much as possible if nothing else, to ensure nappy capacity was maximised by the avoidance of flooding.  This, in combination with high temperatures in Sydney limited my pee volume but even so, by 5pm I’d been in the same nappy for 13 hours and it was swollen.  As near as I could tell, I did not smell but wo really knows.  I certainly could not detect any body language from anybody else to suggest anything amiss. 

5pm (the alleged finish time) came and went as I squelched about on my hard plastic seat being tortured by corporate waffle.  Upon reflection, I was probably suffering far less on those hard seats than my nappy-free colleagues.  I was worried about press-out leaks and was occasionally effecting a hopefully-subtle finger test but the BetterDry held against that as well: it is truly a super-nappy.

Eventually, at around 5:40pm it was announced that as we were behind schedule, we would just go directly from the conference venue to the restaurant venue for drinks and dinner.  Not in THIS nappy I wasn’t!  Fortunately, other interstate travellers who had also started their days a long time ago baulked on my behalf and it was reluctantly conceded that we could check into our hotel for 15m or so to freshen up.

I waddled the half a dozen blocks to my hotel, checked in and launched the world’s quickest rinse and nappy change.  My BetterDry was 2/3 full of suspiciously dark and strong-smelling pee which my waterproofs had done a good job of concealing.  I needed to #2 so took care of that using the toilet.  At the same time, I thought I needed to pee again and as I don’t hold, that pee would finish up in the toilet but it was not to be.  Although I had completely relaxed and felt the urge, all that happened was a steady stream of drips.  It took ages and after what must have been 30 seconds, I ended up just putting on my Molicare and finishing in that as I dressed.  I just didn’t have the time.

The night went fine and fortunately nobody asked me how I could drink 6 beers and never need to go to the bathroom.  On my return to my hotel room, I changed into my night nappies and fell into a deep sleep around 10pm.  In the morning,  I found myself to be much wetter than I remembered but there were no leaks.  I changed into a BetterDry and checked out to return to the conference venue.  I ditched a rubbish bag full of wet disposables in one of the dwindling number of street litter bins in the Sydney CBD.

Day 2 itself went without problem but again, the disabled toilet remained stubbornly locked.  Eventually I decided that my BetterDry would just have to go the distance and I would change myself at the airport club lounge around 5pm before my flight.

In case anybody wants to know, the Qantas Club domestic lounge toilets are useless for adult nappy changing.  The stalls are tiny, the rubbish receptacles are small and overflowing and the crowds attempting to use the facilities at rush hour are intimidating.  My BetterDry was soaked.  There was no way it was going to survive a couple of Club lounge beers and a 1.5 hour flight.

There was one additional unisex/disabled/change room toilet adjacent resplendent with a small sign asking patrons to be thoughtful before occupying it.  I was briefly thoughtful before letting myself in.  I don’t like occupying limited facilities for the disabled but nobody seemed to be waiting for it, I wouldn’t be long and the alternative was likely to be a wet aircraft cushion.  I had decided that in the (incredibly unlikely) scenario that somebody would comment, I would just tell them exactly WHY I used it and be amused by their reaction.  Inside, I had plenty of space to strip my soaked nappy and change.  There was a hand-shower and a thoughtfully-adult-sized sealed bin labelled “nappies”.  I emerged in a dry Molicare that would last all the way home.

At around 10pm that night, I made it home in time for a shower before changing straight into my night nappy and heading for bed.

Also, on an upbeat note, my partner has been friendly and stress-free despite my perpetually-soggy underwear which has been nice.  For my part, I am continuing to be non-confrontational, discrete, but hold my position unapologetically.

[Newbee]

Hi oznl,

im very happy to hear your interstate trip went well. I myself do love the betterdry I use them at night I’m not game to wear them to work though. I really hope that your partner continues to be friendly and stress free. I do hope she does learn to fully except your choice in underwear.

[oznl]

So something odd happened last night that I haven't experienced before and it happened a couple of times.  I was sitting down watching TV in my evening Molicare when I had a sudden, moderate griping gut pain (like an abdominal cramp) except that firstly, it only lasted for half a second if that (a kind of a "pulse") and secondly, it's location was well south of my belly button, at the top of my nappy area - right where my bladder would be.  It felt like something moved in there.  It happened once or twice more including after I'd gotten into bed but hasn't happened at all so far today.

I am a little confused as to what this might have been.  It was quite strong but too brief to be really described as uncomfortable.  It certainly grabbed my attention.

I've heard about "bladder spasms" but I *thought* I'd had experience of these whilst catheterised in hospital once: the (relatively unpleasant) experience I remember was a sudden strong urge to pee that could not be relieved and since I was wearing a catheter, was pointless anyway.  I've had nothing like that so far.

These "pulses" weren't really unpleasant but I'd be interested if anybody has had a similar experience and can explain what is happening here.

Closing in on two months 24x7 diaper use and from a personal experience perspective, I'm completely in uncharted waters here.

On 2/15/2019 at 3:12 PM, Newbee said:

Hi oznl,

im very happy to hear your interstate trip went well. I myself do love the betterdry I use them at night I’m not game to wear them to work though. I really hope that your partner continues to be friendly and stress free. I do hope she does learn to fully except your choice in underwear.

Thank you.  She's only three weeks away from a "holiday" from all of this and I think this is something she is focused on.

[Happilynappied]

On 2/2/2019 at 11:54 PM, oznl said:

Well congratulations on three weeks of cloth nappies: I don't need to imagine how much work and planning that would require!  Cloth is my preference and I spend two days per week in them.  Just that creates a mountain of washing but my wife vastly prefers me to use disposables due to odor (she can smell a wet cloth nappy) and laundry (even though I manage this - she doesn't like all the gear laying around and frets about the neighbors seeing nappies on the line).

Unfortunately, the sheer practicality of disposable nappies is overwhelming but at night, wearing them with my double-terry lined waterproofs makes them look (and to a fair extent, feel) like cloth nappies so I'm actually happy with them at night.  The distinctive "wet nappy" smell at work would be an insta-fail in my book and I can't risk it.

You say you've been in nappies at night over a couple of years.  I'd be very interested to hear if that has resulted in any nocturnal continence issues.  My day control remains strong (only 6 weeks in, unsurprising) but nights are looking like they *might* become involuntarily damp if I persist with this for another month (as I am currently planning to do).

I'm not sure how much recovery time I should plan for before leaving O/S on a (nappy free) trip in mid March.  I don't want any "incidents" on the plane or in hotel beds!  If anybody else with experience on this topic wants to chime in, all inputs gratefully considered...

Thanks , and it did require a lot of effort, i struggled with keeping up with the laundry aspect of being in nappies 24/7, it would have been much easier with twice as many nappies, but at the time it was an experiment like yourself, so i didn't want the extra expense of ordering more, now that i know it's something i wont to do more of i will soon be ordering more, including some disposables. Like you said there is a very distinctive smell with cloth nappies, so disposables are probably a better option for day time wearing when in company of others, at home that dos'nt  matter as i live alone, but even then i only notice the wet nappy smell when waking up in the morning.

As yet i'v not had any issues with losing control at night, i suspect that i would have to use nappies 24/7 for several month's before any  loss of control  would be noticed, but i would be doing well to get to 2 month's.

[FretaBWet]

Hi onsl, I just started reading this thread last night. I’m really enjoying your insights and experiences and plan to continue to read about your progress.

I myself am flirting with 24/7 although my SO says that I’ve been 24/7 for some time. I retired this past November and at the point I retired I was wearing disposable pull ups to work every day because the washable incontinence briefs I had been wearing to work were experiencing leaks due to overcapacity. I say I am flirting with 24/7 because some of the time I will pull my diaper down to use a toilet because it extends the life and lowers the cost.

One tip I can tell you from hard experience is to keep an emergency change bag in EVERY vehicle you use. I have a motorcycle, a pickup and my girlfriends car. I keep a small paper bag with one clean disposable diaper, a travel pack of baby wipes and a small plastic disposal bag to put the used diaper in in all 3 vehicles. One day at work I had an episode of very loose #2 which ended up in my pull up on the way to the ladies room. After the accident I detoured from the ladies room to the outside door nearest my truck to retrieve my “accident bag”. I went to the ladies room and used the handicap stall and ripped the sides of the pull up to remove it. I was covered in excrement but didn’t have any baby wipes! This is not a good time to recognize that I didn’t think out every detail. It took sooooo much toilet paper to get everything off me. It took multiple flushes to keep the toilet from clogging up. I didn’t have anything to contain the smell of the dirty pull up. I went out that day and bought 3 of the very small portable baby wipes they sell for carrying in a diaper bag. I have small plastic bags that come on rolls and I put 1 in each of my “accident bags”. Now if I have a messy accident I have wet wipes to clean myself up with, a clean diaper to put on, I put the used diaper in the plastic bag and tightly knot it so the odor is contained and lastly I put the plastic disposal bag into the paper bag and roll up the bag. Now I can walk out of the stall without having to worry about anyone seeing me drop a diaper into the trash. The paper bag also gives me the ability to just take the bag out of the bathroom to dispose of elsewhere because the smell is contained.

I hope my painful lesson helps you to avoid what I learned the hard way. Also I’ve found myself having more frequent # 2 accidents and you might want to give this some serious thought too. It’s my experience that because I leave my muscles relaxed and unclenched that my anal muscles are weakening too. This may be just my own experience but still bears consideration.

Hugs,

Freta

[oznl]

20 hours ago, FretaBWet said:

One tip I can tell you from hard experience is to keep an emergency change bag in EVERY vehicle you use. I have a motorcycle, a pickup and my girlfriends car.

I have two cars but the other is a "special occasion" vehicle that seldom goes out.  My daily driver has a "crash kit".  I dare not put such a kit in my wife's car - that would just be too confrontational right now.

20 hours ago, FretaBWet said:

 I say I am flirting with 24/7 because some of the time I will pull my diaper down to use a toilet because it extends the life and lowers the cost.
 

I've actually avoided doing this, as tempting as it has been.  The purpose of this exercise was to find out if 24/7 was just a fantasy or a reality that would really want.  I've (some would say courageously, others might say foolishly) risked leaks by letting it go in an already-too-wet nappy but whilst I've had a few wet patches here and there, I haven't had a catastrophic failure.  Using a toilet for peeing would have been a cheat in the context of this but of course fine for you.

20 hours ago, FretaBWet said:

Also I’ve found myself having more frequent # 2 accidents and you might want to give this some serious thought too. It’s my experience that because I leave my muscles relaxed and unclenched that my anal muscles are weakening too. This may be just my own experience but still bears consideration.

I have not noticed this but I'm a long way of any kind of incontinence, I just have some urgency and reduced bladder capacity.  Whilst recreationally I *would* #2 in my nappies, I have not since Christmas and going 24x7.  I just can't see how I possibly could without raising the problems of practicality, discretion and spousal tolerance by orders of magnitude.  Strangely, I have not missed this behavior at all although there has been the odd occasion where I've thought "it would just be a lot more convenient for me to let go right now and deal with this later"!

Anyway, thanks for the tips!  They are appreciated!