Well I'M Finally Going To Do It!

[drnkrdnck]

Tell my wife about being a dl that is. I ordered 2 sample packs from xpmedical so no backing out now, lol. I'm fairly sure her reaction at first will be wtf(who wouldnt have that reaction). I think she will be ok with it, I'm not planning to wear around her or include her unless she says ok or asks me too. It will be good to get this of my chest, I hate hiding this from her. But really what is the big deal it's just a different kind of underwear.

[Darkfinn]

Good luck.

I've seen marriages ruined by this "little secret".

[Guest little_jonny]

Good luck.

I've seen marriages ruined by this "little secret".

so have i. i hope everything goes well and shes supprtive

[dlfriendwearing]

It ended mine after 13 years, so plan it out well. I would suggest telling her in front of a marriage counciller, so she can ask questions and get a professional answers at the same time.

[Forced2wet]

Good luck with everything.

Let us know how you get on!

[Jabez]

Good luck since it's one of those things that are best told up front before-hand.

[orange clock]

I hope it goes well. Just be yourself and if she is not ok with that then it was not meant to be. Although, wouldn't it be insanely crazy if she was an ab/dl too? what would be the odds? Just think, if you haven't told her yet then there is a possibility (albeit next to none) that she hasn't told you yet either. I hope that happens for you and you live happily ever after .

[SomeThing]

I don't think it was a good idea to order the samples and then speak to your wife. I'd have had "the talk" first and only ordered things if she agrees or doesn't mind that much.

I imagine ABs have it harder than DLs as that's more of a lifestyle thing and there's more to object to. I'll imagine she'll get concerned that you might be more sexually attracted to diapers than her, or that the only way she'll be able to satisfy you is with diapers. I don't know what kind of a DL you are, but you'll need to think about how you'll explain this to her (and have a contingency plan).

You should have raised this before you got married (assuming it's something you've known about yourself for that long), after all people are more willing to accept buying a TV knowing it's got a scratch on it, rather than paying for it and then discovering the scratch, I feel this is the same way. She will feel betrayed that you didn't disclose this earlier (though she'll probably understand if you had fears of rejection initially).

I think the conversation might work better if you make dinner (a good one, of course) and during the table conversation you pose hypotheticals, such as those that are better-known, such transvestitism or leather fetishes, and take it from there; maybe talk about something subjectively much worse (like, maybe scat or something else you can think of) that way a diaper fetish doesn't seem so bad in comparison.

[AutieAB]

I don't think it was a good idea to order the samples and then speak to your wife. I'd have had "the talk" first and only ordered things if she agrees or doesn't mind that much.

This. Am I right in assuming that you're expecting her to get them from the mailbox and ask you what they are (or what they're for) to kick-start the conversation? If you do that, you're starting with a deceit rather than with an undisclosed secret...... Slim difference when you're married but a difference none the less.

Be careful but be honest too.

[Guest YkDave]

i have to agree, the chances of this turning out great, are kindof slim...

The worst part is, she probably wont be upset about your little 'hobby' (or maybe just a bit), but the fact that you have been keeping it a secret from her. especially if your relationship is really 'open', thats sure to boil her blood!

[Guest Saturnine]

Ther is no way to be able to predict how a situation will play out until it actually dose. Tell her, and hope for the best. There isn't an idea way to tell a SO about such a secret lifestyle. For something like this it is better to somply say "I like diapers". Keep it short, but pretty self explantorey.

[Bettypooh]

You didn't need the diapers to talk with her so with your ordering them first I'd say you'd better tread very lightly with this It seems to me that you really don't have as good a grasp on yourself and the relationship as you think but I'll wish you luck anyway

Bettypooh

[curiositykilledthecat]

I don't foresee this ending well. I hope it does but you should have come clean prior to marriage.

[BBB]

Train wrecks......

I see one coming.

[\img]

[aleyxsis]

I see the train a coming and it is coming round the bend hesd on if you don't do this right be very cool !

[Guest Saturnine]

I imagine judging from OP's original post, the trainwreck has already happened. So instead of predicting the trainwreck maybe we should be asking him if he is okay from the wreck? Any lost limbs? Or loss of life? Or did the train actually not wreck and pull into the station on time? I'd like to know because it sounds like a very dangerous plan he has.

Hopefully it is all okay and not too many people died.

[drnkrdnck]

Update: Well I'm still alive. She actually reacted like I thought she would . She laughed at first and said your weird. She said to each his own, and whatever makes you happy. But(there's always a but isn't there) she doesn't want to see it or participate. Which is totally fine with me. Then a while latter after she had some time to process all this she asked the question that non abdl's always seem to ask is does it involve kids. Of course the answer is NO. But oh man was my stomach in knots before and during showing her.

[KrisNdiapers]

Good luck

[Guest Saturnine]

Wowzers congrats on the semi-success. It's nice to hear a coming out baby event turns out good, or at least not too bad.

I did have a feeling she would probably ask you about children. It is irritating having the rest of the world lump you together with pedophiles, but i don't let that get me mad because I can understand from a non ABDL persepctive why exactly is IS reasonable to assume the connection. Diapers have an inherent relationship association with children, specifically babies. So it's a logical thing to think someone sees us as pedophiles. But we all know we are not....at elast I hope everyone here is kosher and someone isn't a pedophile.

[DailyDi]

Glad it seems to be working out for you!

[sarah_ab]

ok first off... congrats..

second off, i swear if i hear people say one more time "all non abdl's think this has to do with kids" i'm going to scream in alllll the conversations i have had with people about kinks, and diapers come up not a single person has related it to kids... from ages 20 - 65 i've talked about it with and they never ever ever have mentioned it ahving anything to do with kids.....

where are these people that they automatically think of kids????

[DailyDi]

where are these people that they automatically think of kids????

I think it has to do with people saying "I like diapers" instead of saying "I like to WEAR diapers."

Subtle difference, but takes away the "what does he/she like about diapers?" questions.

[sarah_ab]

I think it has to do with people saying "I like diapers" instead of saying "I like to WEAR diapers."

Subtle difference, but takes away the "what does he/she like about diapers?" questions.

ok yes thank you that makes sense to me, if i were not aware of this and heard 'i like diapers' my first thought would be either elderly people, handicapped people, and/or infants/toddlers.

I guess in my mind when someone is telling someone about being a dl they would say "i like to wear diapers" but i see what you are saying.... I just for hte life of me couldn't figure it out. For me, when i was asked "what fetish" i said, i'm into age play scenarios. I suggest using this for people who are ab's... age play scenarios, tells the person 1. its not real for the individual (as in 'real children') 2. its play and so that doens't mean they are going to be doing it all the time and when an adult says play in that conversation it often implies in private.... and scenarioes means it could be many different ages... and theres no need to elaborate on what ages unless the person asks...

if they say whats that '' i have said, is when i role play as a girl much younger and my partner plays as my father/teacher/babysitter etc... honestly, most people arent going to need much more and some may say "do you wear diapers" to which just answer honesetly, if you are comfortable with yourself, and come across that way, and just say "yeah sometimes" the person is more likely to drop it.

[Vic]

Okay, done with the pedos, I'm still concerned for the OP. Sure it wasn't a total train wreck, and that's cool and all, but I don't think he's out of the woods yet.

With a little more time to process this she may have more questions, and she might feel a little cheated that he didn't explain this to her BEFORE they were married. I don't know, all could go well, but he might not be out of the woods yet.

Peace,

Vic

[drnkrdnck]

It's kind of a outta sight outta mind thing I guess. I answered all of her questions(there were quite a few) and she made it clear she doesn't want to participate, which is fine with me. I think she'll be ok with it she was kinda chuckling the whole time she was asking questions and not pissed off. And I did explain to her why I didn't tell her sooner. But time will tell I guess.