When I Least Expect It!

[turtlepins]

Being incontinent means I get to wear diapers all the time, free of any guilt or worries. I need them. Being diagnosed with infantilism also means that just wearing diapers isn't enough sometimes. Flashbacks, nightmares, and daily stress often brings with it the need for more. Adding a diaper, cuddling with my blankey and plushy grumpy doll, needing a bottle or my pacifier comes when I least expect it. When in the throes of infantilism fear is always heightened. Part of that fear is that you will say or do something inappropriate because every woman becomes a potential "mommy" and one tends to think about letting "someone see". I fought it all today at a 4th of July party we were invited to by a close friend. She and her husband were the only people I knew well and they were the only people at that particular party I felt comfortable with. Of course, everyone wanted to come by and talk, and stand too close in already close quarters. Fortunately my wife caught the situation quickly enough to pull me away from them all and out into an open area where I wasn't claustrophobic. By then it was too late though. All the needs were there. We are funny creatures sometimes. I'm supposed to be Mr. Big and Brave, and inside I'm an infant in need of a mommy.

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

Flashbacks, nightmares, and daily stress

May I be frank? If these words are truly how you feel, then you should see a therapist.

Flashbacks and nightmares? Of what? This sounds like a deep rooted problem that infantilism cannot fully solve.

I'm being honest and helpful here. If I knew of someone who couldn't even go to a 4th of July party without getting claustrophobic and on the verge of becoming a baby, I would recomment getting true psychological help.

This extends beyond diapers and infantilism.

When you go, use the same terminology. I mean, flashback is indicative of past trauma, and nightmare in indicative of deep rooted psychological issues.

[Bettypooh]

Being incontinent means I get to wear diapers all the time, free of any guilt or worries. I need them. Being diagnosed with infantilism also means that just wearing diapers isn't enough sometimes. Flashbacks, nightmares, and daily stress often brings with it the need for more. Adding a diaper, cuddling with my blankey and plushy grumpy doll, needing a bottle or my pacifier comes when I least expect it. When in the throes of infantilism fear is always heightened. Part of that fear is that you will say or do something inappropriate because every woman becomes a potential "mommy" and one tends to think about letting "someone see". I fought it all today at a 4th of July party we were invited to by a close friend. She and her husband were the only people I knew well and they were the only people at that particular party I felt comfortable with. Of course, everyone wanted to come by and talk, and stand too close in already close quarters. Fortunately my wife caught the situation quickly enough to pull me away from them all and out into an open area where I wasn't claustrophobic. By then it was too late though. All the needs were there. We are funny creatures sometimes. I'm supposed to be Mr. Big and Brave, and inside I'm an infant in need of a mommy.

Sorry you had to go through that It's tough hiding your true feelings sometimes and I usually say not to do that because of all the additional problems it brings. However you and I have decided on a course of life that makes it necessary to keep certain things hidden in certain environments- you with your ABness and me with my Gender As long as it's your best option then don't let the hiding get you down, just make enough time to express it in your life somewhere while knowing that you're temporarily trading one happiness for another which means more to you at that moment. There are times I want to squeal and giggle, times when I want to burst into tears, times when I want to give someone a bug hug to comfort them- yet I can't without risking the loss of my job or endangering my own safety It's frustrating to an extreme but unless I transition I have to put those feelings in a box and deal with them later on when I can do it openly. With me I have to dump that box out and deal with it daily when I get home. Each day the size of the box varies on it's own so that sometimes I have to find some privacy mid-day and let those emotions run their course so that I can get back to living my life the way I have to As long as I don't try to over-stuff the box I manage OK, my job and sanity remain intact, and I can have a tomorrow. It's not out fault that society makes us suffer for hiding our true selves, but we are the ones who have to pay the emotional price for doing it if we're going to remain in society. I make some small way to express my girlishness every day when I go to work, usually by wearing something I know came from the Ladies department even if that's not evident to anyone else It's my way of thumbing my nose back at this intolerant society and that helps keep me sane. Everyone can do something similar, even of it's just a safety pin attached to your keyring as a reminder that you are OK just as you are, even if you have to hide it sometimes. When you feel down think about that item- and think how the oh-so-smart world which doesn't want to give the real you a chance hasn't got enough brains to see what you're doing It will bring relief or a smile which is even better. It helps you get through the day

Remember that you're 100% fine just as you are, even if most of the world doesn't understand that, and don't let them get you down

Bettypooh

[rusty pins]

May I be frank? If these words are truly how you feel, then you should see a therapist.

Flashbacks and nightmares? Of what? This sounds like a deep rooted problem that infantilism cannot fully solve.

I'm being honest and helpful here. If I knew of someone who couldn't even go to a 4th of July party without getting claustrophobic and on the verge of becoming a baby, I would recomment getting true psychological help.

This extends beyond diapers and infantilism.

When you go, use the same terminology. I mean, flashback is indicative of past trauma, and nightmare in indicative of deep rooted psychological issues.

Thank you Wetnmessy for an insiteful reply! I believe that turtlepins has discussed in the past some of his flashback problems and I'm sure he has discussed it with many professionals. Anyway, after all the negative feedback you've recieved, it's nice to read a decent post from you!

[Darkfinn]

May I be frank? If these words are truly how you feel, then you should see a therapist.

Now that's the pot calling the kettle black.

[square_duck]

May I be frank? If these words are truly how you feel, then you should see a therapist.

Flashbacks and nightmares? Of what? This sounds like a deep rooted problem that infantilism cannot fully solve.

I'm being honest and helpful here. If I knew of someone who couldn't even go to a 4th of July party without getting claustrophobic and on the verge of becoming a baby, I would recomment getting true psychological help.

This extends beyond diapers and infantilism.

When you go, use the same terminology. I mean, flashback is indicative of past trauma, and nightmare in indicative of deep rooted psychological issues.

Well, as usual, we have yet another person who failed to do any research before posting. Had this poster done a bit of reading BEFORE hand, this wouldn't have happened.

TP has posted many times about his struggles and issues as follows:

http://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?showtopic=20410&st=0&p=274344&fromsearch=1&#entry274344

http://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?showtopic=18846&st=0&p=245163&fromsearch=1&#entry245163

http://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?showtopic=18591&st=0&p=240856&fromsearch=1&#entry240856

As you can see, he is all to to aware of his issues and he continues to struggle and work on them. The above post is uncalled for and just illustrative of the posters laziness and ignorance.

Again, had the poster done ANY reading, he would notice that TP has been here since May 2006 and has 841 posts, so you would think that SOMEWHERE along the way he would have discussed this issue in the past.

But no, little Mr "helpful Harry" with with 734 posts and joined in march 2010 has to shoot his mouth off again....

and people wonder why I don't read ANY of his posts...

Also, though I know people try to be kind, rewarding peoples ignorant behavior and laziness accomplishes nothing, thats why I have my foot in his ass, TP has enough issues with out someone else trying to offer something that already has been pursued and is in process.....some people just don't f*ckin' THINK.

And yes I AM in a PISSY mood

Deal with it

[curiositykilledthecat]

wait..wait...wait...wait...wait...wait. wait, wait, wait! Did Wetnmessy just tell someone else to see a therapist?

TP has been very frank about his issues on here and he knows what he needs to do to handle them. Hell I just spent all week trying to keep a friend from killing himself, DW being well DW and my own issues to deal with. I'm completely raw right now, however I have discovered that despite how I feel I am far stronger than I ever realized.

In regards to TP, I know how you feel, it is extrememly hard to be the "tough one" when deep down you feel the exact opposite.

[Vickie]

I don't follow this board regularly. Only when I am having a lot of stress in my life. I was about to post the same sort of thing. He needs to talk to someone who can help him. If I had been the one to say it first would I be attacked on here for doing so? I really don't know much about the rest of you. I have not been following others to know if they are getting help or even need it. I think we (and most people) need some help from time to time. I can't take crowds. At least where they know me. I can get lost in a crowded stadium but 10 or 15 people at a party can overwhelm me. I can perform on stage yet have people sing Happy Birthday to me in a restaurant and I have a panic attack. So if someone tells me I need help after saying that on a message board where we should be friends I would think they care about me.

From a lot of the feedback I see on this board to post people make I try not to post. Anyone (except the cool ones) post anything he or she risk attack and ridicule.

Lighten up people, we are all sick, crazy people who are in need of help. Our diapers, baby stuff and boards like this is how we deal with our problems. Don't take any part of it away.

[curiositykilledthecat]

I don't follow this board regularly. Only when I am having a lot of stress in my life. I was about to post the same sort of thing. He needs to talk to someone who can help him. If I had been the one to say it first would I be attacked on here for doing so? I really don't know much about the rest of you. I have not been following others to know if they are getting help or even need it. I think we (and most people) need some help from time to time. I can't take crowds. At least where they know me. I can get lost in a crowded stadium but 10 or 15 people at a party can overwhelm me. I can perform on stage yet have people sing Happy Birthday to me in a restaurant and I have a panic attack. So if someone tells me I need help after saying that on a message board where we should be friends I would think they care about me.

From a lot of the feedback I see on this board to post people make I try not to post. Anyone (except the cool ones) post anything he or she risk attack and ridicule.

Lighten up people, we are all sick, crazy people who are in need of help. Our diapers, baby stuff and boards like this is how we deal with our problems. Don't take any part of it away.

If you were active enough to know what was going on then you would understand. Just search Wetnmessy's post history and you'll see why he got the responses he did.

[square_duck]

No one is trying to take anything away here. I responded the way I did because I really cannot stand stupidity. (Again in a pissy mood ) I have read and followed many of Turtle pins posts and I understand where he is coming from. Also, I understand where you are coming from as I cannot stand large crowds and loud or noisy places. In fact I was just discussing this topic with my therapist on my last visit. I have an issue with becoming overwhelmed with sensory input, both auditory and visual. i cannot filter out noise and sound and it all come in at the same level and is insanely irratating, so i usually avoid those places and situations where this may occur. As you may also guess I detest loud noises and motorcycles (Harlys in particular) drive me nuts.

Anyways, yes, we all have our issues and foibles, but neither I nor anyone else needs so psudo know-it-all/ hypocrite telling us to get help...fuck that.

Turtle pins (TP) is a great guy, writes great stories and I follow much for what he writes, and I consider him a friend, regardless of the mess in his head. So again, having someone else tell him he needs help is just ludicrous, especially when he has posted several places that he has done so many times through his life, and is an on going struggle.....

[Backindiapers]

May I be frank? If these words are truly how you feel, then you should see a therapist.

Flashbacks and nightmares? Of what? This sounds like a deep rooted problem that infantilism cannot fully solve.

I'm being honest and helpful here. If I knew of someone who couldn't even go to a 4th of July party without getting claustrophobic and on the verge of becoming a baby, I would recomment getting true psychological help.

This extends beyond diapers and infantilism.

When you go, use the same terminology. I mean, flashback is indicative of past trauma, and nightmare in indicative of deep rooted psychological issues.

All you have to do is read his post a little closer and you would have known he has sought out treatment. He said, "Being diagnosed with infantilism also means that just wearing diapers isn't enough sometimes." So we can conclude from context clues that he HAS been diagnosed by a professional. And is probably on an ongoing treatment regiment of some fashion. You don't even need to search past posts by TP. Just read a little closer and try to comprehend before we feel the need to give feedback.

[toon]

our thoughts and hearts are with you my friend. I cant even imagine enduring something so terrible. I dont see how anyone could NOT understand your regression once they learn about what you've been through. Keep on keeping on man and I am someone who will be a shoulder or an ear if you ever need to vent....or just ramble to. My deepest sympathies and thoughts go out to you.

[toon]

May I be frank? If these words are truly how you feel, then you should see a therapist.

Flashbacks and nightmares? Of what? This sounds like a deep rooted problem that infantilism cannot fully solve.

I'm being honest and helpful here. If I knew of someone who couldn't even go to a 4th of July party without getting claustrophobic and on the verge of becoming a baby, I would recomment getting true psychological help.

This extends beyond diapers and infantilism.

When you go, use the same terminology. I mean, flashback is indicative of past trauma, and nightmare in indicative of deep rooted psychological issues.

your a douche.

[curiositykilledthecat]

I had a similar regressive moment on Friday night. My little side kind of forced his way out, however for the most part Mia was a good sport about it and went with it, well as far as she can. I don't normally walk around with my binky or plushy anywhere in public and for whatever reason happened to have both on me as we went for vegan chinese on Friday night and the ride home was fun. I was a little disoriented later but hey it's nice to let loose once in a while instead of trying to hold eveyrthing back.

[belinda_sue_fox]

Don't believe a word of it. Time and again he has been caught out lying.

Only thing he has messed up is his stories and well what he posts as real.

[Nia]

Your not alone Turtlepins. I get very similar feelings especially around people. And your the first person who has mentioned looking at the other women as potential mommy's which I can totally relate to. Saturday we had to go a work BBQ for my mommy with a lot of people I didn't know. I can't handle large groups and people wanting to interact with me and all I wanted to do was crawl in my mommy's lap and stay there. By the time we left I was shaking and ready to go find my puffy at home and hide. My psychologist is working through the past with me and say's it will get better but some day's I just don't want to be big.

Nia

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

Oh geez. I don't not see you said you sought help.

My sincerest apologies. Sorry.

[curiositykilledthecat]

who are you ragging on Belinda?

[turtlepins]

May I be frank? If these words are truly how you feel, then you should see a therapist.

Flashbacks and nightmares? Of what? This sounds like a deep rooted problem that infantilism cannot fully solve.

I'm being honest and helpful here. If I knew of someone who couldn't even go to a 4th of July party without getting claustrophobic and on the verge of becoming a baby, I would recomment getting true psychological help.

This extends beyond diapers and infantilism.

When you go, use the same terminology. I mean, flashback is indicative of past trauma, and nightmare in indicative of deep rooted psychological issues.

First, thanks for looking out for me. I am back with a therapist because the flashbacks and nightmares are turning me into a sniveling coward! My psychiatrist has scheduled me to see a hypnotherapist too, to try to unlock whatever wasn't unlocked last time. I'll probably end up in an institution for a few weeks again. Oh well! My wife and family are being very protective. I don't want to remember what my mother and aunt did to me any more. Last time I regressed and stayed there for months. I'm supposed to be strong, have faith, remember the "good" things. Thanks again for being so kind. Hugs.

[turtlepins]

Remember that you're 100% fine just as you are, even if most of the world doesn't understand that, and don't let them get you down

Bettypooh

I saw a nine-month-old baby girl tonight and nearly cried wanting to be her! I think I'll wear my rhumba pants with the pink ruffles tomorrow when I go to work. Thanks for the reminder. Hugs.

[turtlepins]

And yes I AM in a PISSY mood

Deal with it

Throw on another diaper, old friend! You are always a gem. Hugs.

[turtlepins]

I don't follow this board regularly. Only when I am having a lot of stress in my life. I was about to post the same sort of thing. He needs to talk to someone who can help him. If I had been the one to say it first would I be attacked on here for doing so? I really don't know much about the rest of you. I have not been following others to know if they are getting help or even need it. I think we (and most people) need some help from time to time. I can't take crowds. At least where they know me. I can get lost in a crowded stadium but 10 or 15 people at a party can overwhelm me. I can perform on stage yet have people sing Happy Birthday to me in a restaurant and I have a panic attack. So if someone tells me I need help after saying that on a message board where we should be friends I would think they care about me.

From a lot of the feedback I see on this board to post people make I try not to post. Anyone (except the cool ones) post anything he or she risk attack and ridicule.

Lighten up people, we are all sick, crazy people who are in need of help. Our diapers, baby stuff and boards like this is how we deal with our problems. Don't take any part of it away.

Vicki, you are so sweet! Thanks. I took the post as it was meant, as a help. I love the folks in here, and though some of them aren't nice all the time, most of them are just swell. Hugs.

[turtlepins]

Don't believe a word of it. Time and again he has been caught out lying.

Only thing he has messed up is his stories and well what he posts as real.

Hi Belinda Sue Fox! Nice to see you haven't changed. Hugs.

[rusty pins]

Oh geez. I don't not see you said you sought help.

My sincerest apologies. Sorry.

People. I know Wetnmessy has pissed off a lot of people with many of his posts, me included. Once someone gets an impression of someone in their heads, it's hard to change that impression. I'm not suggesting that anyone change the way they feel about another person based on what has been posted in the past. On the other hand, since many people here like roll playing as babies and todders, please keep an open mind about one thing. Children learn from how their parents teach them. If you do something bad, you are usually punished for it in some way. On the other hand, if you do something good you are usually praised or rewarded for doing the proper thing. That in turn will cause the child to want to keep doing things that are right in order to get that praise.

Let's take wetnmessy's situation. He has made many many posts that totally disgust people. Posts of changing only once a day, going out interacting with regular people in public at stores, amusement parks or just on the sidewalk when in stinky messy diapers. He makes no bones about telling people he choses to wear and use diapers by his own personal choice. That can upset a lot of people, me included. He has recieved many negative responses for his posts including some from me, which I can relate to as "punnishment" for his bad behavior. Now, if you read both his responses to Turtlepins original post, it seems like he is genuinly concerned and offering some advice that, personally, is not bad advice at all. His mistake is that he was not aware of the many times Turtlepins has posted of his problems on this site. Face it, many of us have tunnel vision when it comes to posts and topics that we like to read. I, for one do not get into sissy or baby stuff and therefore, those topics and posts are not something I may chose to read. It's not wrong to assume that Wetnmessy hasn't read Turtlpins previous posts.

After all the negative responses I and other people have given to Wetnmessy (and rightly so in most cases), don't you think he warrents a little praise when he actually posts a good response? That's not to say everyone here should forgive and forget the past, but since so many complain about his bad posts all the time, what can he possibly think when we complain about a good post? I would think, "Damned if I do and damned if I don't!" Why should he ever want to change from his normally disgusting posts to good posts if he's going to get flamed either way? As I say, children learn from praise and punishment so if we all want his disgusting posts to go away in favor of more civilized posts, how about letting him know when he does have a decent post instead of just automatically dissing him? Sure, it was an oversite that he wasn't aware of Turtlepins previous posts about is problems, but is that such a bad thing in light of the rest of his post? Haven't we all missed something at times? Now, should anyone get me wrong, I will still be vocal about any future disgusting posts of his just as I have been in the past, however I will give a positive response to a decent post of his when I think the situation calls for it.

[Guest Wetnmessy247]

Thank you rusty pins. I've taken more sh*t than most people would care to endure here.

Yes it is a "damned if I do, damned if I don't" thing. Ihave tried to put in good input here, which gets overlooked.

I'm trying to be a member here, and that's hard to ingratiate yourself into a group when some of the members threaten death and tell me to go kill myself.

It's a good thing I am not an emo high school kid. Otherwise you would have heard aabout me in the news.

I try. God knows I try here.

However, once a fad starts, EVERYONE jpins in just for sh*ts nd giggles. Most people here do NOT know how they come off to peope like me who are afraid to post here.

This place is VERY hostile to new members. VERY HOSTILE.

If a new member has so much as one single independent thought that is not in accordance with the "major" posters here, then that person should expect flame wars. Independent thought is looked down upon here. I'm honestly tired of the hypocrites that rule this place. Yes, the people who post constantly and feel like the are kings of the diaper boards.

Step outside. Get some sun for your pale white skin. And get some ice cream. Maybe some sweet foods will take away the bitter nature of people here.

Reaad my sig. I have tons of support from people that don't post because they see the hatred I get and they don't want the same.

What's worse is that I can't go ANYWHERE to talk poop. Even the goddang POOP FORUM.

Duhhhr. I can talk poop there. It's the f'n poop forum.

Thanks again, rusty pins. At least someoen here has a little happiness to share, and not hellish suicidal requests.