Why Are Some People So Mean

[Conatus]

to the OP i think some people are mean because they are ignorant. they just don't understand that there is a better way to be. i believe if you put out good vibes then good vibes will come back your way. i also agree that some people are sensitive too and they perceive things to be rude or directed at them when they are merely a statement. sometimes i will tell my friends that if i want them to be offended then i will tell them.

[Repaid1]

I remember Mike saying the rep system has something to do with post moderation. Like if you have a certain number of negative rep then your posts have to be approved by an admin before they are posted.

Though, I could be wrong. I seem to remember something like that, though.

I've been dealing with this issue in my mind as well. DD originally turned it off. I get so damned pissed (check my diaper) that certain people can post and no matter what they post, is automatically hit with several negatives. People grow up! IT's not there for you to ruin their life. Your not going to change me as a MOD. I'm not going to BAN someone because you seem to think a bad reputation of a certain amount is a BAN. I follow every post on this board several times a day (usually). If you don't like someone on this board then refrain or respond as was mentioned above. Keep it simple..voice your opinion..then move on to discussion.

This is what the forums are for. Just "flagging" someones post for who the are..or what they said in another post is no reason to kick them on any other post.

I'm sure there is a way for me to look up who's flagging who..I haven't looked..nor do I want to. Please people, knock of the erroneous negatives by names only. I would rather knock the people who abuse the system, than to have to delete the system.. I have spoken

Anyway just get along..

[sarah_ab]

I've been dealing with this issue in my mind as well. DD originally turned it off. I get so damned pissed (check my diaper) that certain people can post and no matter what they post, is automatically hit with several negatives. People grow up! IT's not there for you to ruin their life. Your not going to change me as a MOD. I'm not going to BAN someone because you seem to think a bad reputation of a certain amount is a BAN. I follow every post on this board several times a day (usually). If you don't like someone on this board then refrain or respond as was mentioned above. Keep it simple..voice your opinion..then move on to discussion.

This is what the forums are for. Just "flagging" someones post for who the are..or what they said in another post is no reason to kick them on any other post.

I'm sure there is a way for me to look up who's flagging who..I haven't looked..nor do I want to. Please people, knock of the erroneous negatives by names only. I would rather knock the people who abuse the system, than to have to delete the system.. I have spoken

Anyway just get along..

heheheh wonder what would happen if i voted you negative? lol not because i disagree with you or what you said.. just cause in this instance it would be funny.

[Repaid1]

Ummmm........Retaliation

[ldatsea]

But can i keep my +264? It makes me feel special.

just for that comment i'm giving you a -1 .... aww i'm not that mean.

[SKIP]

Just to let you know I just got a -1 in Bonnie's now home after posting whet I thought was a reasonable question

[timmyc]

I'm seriously considering shutting off the reputation system as too many people are overusing and abusing it.

Ok with me, I hate it, we are all smart enough to determine if we like a post or not, all by ourselves. And I +1'd you for suggesting it

[sarah_ab]

Ok with me, I hate it, we are all smart enough to determine if we like a post or not, all by ourselves. And I +1'd you for suggesting it

its true.. i also believe everything i see on tv and read online... cause i've got me some edumacation

[Frink]

I'm seriously considering shutting off the reputation system as too many people are overusing and abusing it.

I'm down with this.

[Horndog]

I just had the coolest idea.

+1 people whose posts are so crazy that the people posting them should qualify for the Darwin Awards.

[babykeiff]

I'm seriously considering shutting off the reputation system as too many people are overusing and abusing it.

DD,

with this you have my 100% support and agreement. In a board like this, where peoples views are as diverse, something as subjective as a rating system can be dangerous. I have yet to see a mentally positive side to grading people.

Repaid1,

does your comment 'retaliation' not deserve a negative vote, and if not, why not?

This is exactly the point I am making referring to 'grading'. Repaid1 is a MOD, yet people are fearful of downgrading any of his or any MODs posts, yet will grade members here for either fun / personal dislike / disagreement to points made.

I, as an AB, treat this group as a creche or nursery where I can play and have fun, and also where like minded people can help one another. In that type of world, is any one of us better than the other - I say no. We all need help in some way, and a grading system is, in my opinion, not helpful.

[Repaid1]

DD,

with this you have my 100% support and agreement. In a board like this, where peoples views are as diverse, something as subjective as a rating system can be dangerous. I have yet to see a mentally positive side to grading people.

Repaid1,

does your comment 'retaliation' not deserve a negative vote, and if not, why not?

This is exactly the point I am making referring to 'grading'. Repaid1 is a MOD, yet people are fearful of downgrading any of his or any MODs posts, yet will grade members here for either fun / personal dislike / disagreement to points made.

I, as an AB, treat this group as a creche or nursery where I can play and have fun, and also where like minded people can help one another. In that type of world, is any one of us better than the other - I say no. We all need help in some way, and a grading system is, in my opinion, not helpful.

"does your comment 'retaliation' not deserve a negative vote, and if not, why not?"

It would, had you not known it was a private joke and the person for who it was intended got it (And you are 19 1/2 ) Just a ongoing little thing going on between us for a bit. No harm, no foul. But to answer your question had someone rated me for a post that they did not agree to. I would find that fine.

The point is people are not using it to rate a post they use it against a member. Just "flagging" every post from a member is just wrong. It's not there for that.

ALSO I have stated many times... I AM am member of this site FIRST!! there is NO real need to fear my moderator status unless you deserve it. I do not use the Admin position to serve as a tool for personal use. I believe that why I was Nominated and "voted" as a mod on this site. I believe my true reputation on this board stands (not the electronic one). I have discussed issues that I have found even when Daily Di might have offended me.

If I'm not afraid of being kicked off or banned with a intelligent conversation from him. Then no one should ever be "afraid" of me!

[Guest]

I'm down with this.

X2 big time

[sarah_ab]

ALSO I have stated many times... I AM am member of this site FIRST!! there is NO real need to fear my moderator status unless you deserve it. . Then no one should ever be "afraid" of me!

heheheh i'm waiting for the "you wouldn't LIKE me when i'm angry" comment!

[diamondback6881]

Repaid1 is a MOD, yet people are fearful of downgrading any of his or any MODs posts

Uh, no I'm not.

If he posted something that I found offensive, I would have zero problems downgrading such a post.

[sarah_ab]

actually what really bothers me is the limit about how many positives and negatives you can give a day... some of us are very active on this board.. so why the limit!????

[Darkfinn]

As an adult... it should be pretty clear to anyone by now that the world isn't all happy and sugar coated dripping in sunshine every single moment. Some people choose to not beat around the bush and simply tell it like it is. Personally, I respect that characteristic in individuals... it lets me know that they are honest and not going to bullshit me.

As far as "mean"... some people are downright mean, and some people are just too sensitive. If you don't like what's being said, simply ignore the person saying it or go somewhere else. We all have the freedom to express ourselves so long as that expression is tolerated by our peers.

I've heard it said best, "tough cookies". In other words... like it or lump it, you're gonna have to live with it, no use whining about it.

[sarah_ab]

As an adult... it should be pretty clear to anyone by now that the world isn't all happy and sugar coated dripping in sunshine every single moment.

i've been on percocet for the past week. the world IS all happy and sugar coated for me!!!!

[Horndog]

I believe that people shouldn't care about what others think of them. Once I stopped caring, life wasn't so much of an obstacle for me.

[Yvhuce]

I believe that people shouldn't care about what others think of them. Once I stopped caring, life wasn't so much of an obstacle for me.

Agreed. The main problem is that social conditioning tends to be counter to this. Everyone is expected to want people to like them.

[Pudding]

actually what really bothers me is the limit about how many positives and negatives you can give a day... some of us are very active on this board.. so why the limit!????

It's so you can't +1 every one of your own posts ^_~

[sarah_ab]

It's so you can't +1 every one of your own posts ^_~

well thats lame!

[Snugglebug]

As an adult... it should be pretty clear to anyone by now that the world isn't all happy and sugar coated dripping in sunshine every single moment. Some people choose to not beat around the bush and simply tell it like it is. Personally, I respect that characteristic in individuals... it lets me know that they are honest and not going to bullshit me.

As far as "mean"... some people are downright mean, and some people are just too sensitive. If you don't like what's being said, simply ignore the person saying it or go somewhere else. We all have the freedom to express ourselves so long as that expression is tolerated by our peers.

I've heard it said best, "tough cookies". In other words... like it or lump it, you're gonna have to live with it, no use whining about it.

Nope. Life isn't all happy sunshine. That doesn't give anyone the right to be an a$$hole, however. If a$$holes don't like what I have to say about their behaviour, 'tough cookies'.

[diaperpt]

I believe that people shouldn't care about what others think of them. Once I stopped caring, life wasn't so much of an obstacle for me.

yes, but I hope we could all recognize the difference between not caring what others think and not caring what we do to others...

Being a slave to what you think others might think about you is one thing. Avoiding that can be liberating and allow you to speak openly and candidly. Not caring about people at all can lead to arrogance, rude talk and behavior and just plain meanness for its own sake.

DirtyRocker, I'm not saying this is you, but I think the difference between the two is sometimes forgotten in some people. You say that once you stopped caring, life wasn't so much of an obstacle for you... for some, leaving the emotionally broken, bleeding bodies of others behind them isn't necessarily an obstacle to THEM, but it isn't necessarily a very decent thing to do. I think its important to see that distinction and behave accordingly.

[babyvr6]

actually what really bothers me is the limit about how many positives and negatives you can give a day... some of us are very active on this board.. so why the limit!????

I spend most of my allotted +/- 's on fixing the arbitrary -1s that some posts get.