[I asked Chat GPT for help with my incontinence and here's the response.]

Seems a fairly balanced answer to me. What's your take on it?

[DRYLIFE Diapers]

19 hours ago, Rachel1 said:

Ive wore 2 of the Drylife and im very impressed  with them. ive worn them for 6hrs and, there was still room for more exorbsion. The tabs as you say are good very strong and hard to remove from the landing without tearing the plastic. Have to get the tabs right first time unless remove the second removal tab and reposition it. For a long time my go to nappy was ID expert slip plus  they are  good but drylife are far much better.the IDs. So can you tell me how you get them on subcription, and witch company you get them from. I think the Drylife will be my go to from now on.

I get them from incontinenceshop.com. They have excellent customer service and if you order in the morning you can usually get next day delivery to UK mainland.

Interesting what you say about ID Slip Expert as I've never tried them but was considering giving them a go. Maybe I won't bother now ? ?

[DRYLIFE Diapers]

@Rachel1 these are my go-to nappies. I can do at least 5-6 hours reliably in them during the day and use them overnight (although I'm not a particularly heavy bedwetter). I find them really comfy and soft and the tabs have never failed on me yet.

In the UK they are way cheaper than any other good quality nappy. I buy them on subscription and it works out about 67 pence per nappy. All in all, I would 100% recommend them.

[Not ready to announce to my neighbourhood that I am incontinent]

14 hours ago, anned said:

In the US, a bin with a yellow lid and the words diapers on it would be a violation of HIPAA.

https://www.cdc.gov/phlp/publications/topic/hipaa.html

That's actually really interesting - I might have to speak to the Council again about this and provide this as an example of whynthey shouldnt be expecting us to agree to it. Thanks for sharing.

[One Week at a Time]

4 hours ago, Stuffie Snake said:

I realize I will need to talk to my doctors and inform them if I do stick with this new method of attempting radical acceptance but I am not entirely looking forward to the conversation (my next appointment is in two months). 

I wouldn't worry about this; if you're still wearing 24/7 in 2 months' time, you'll be more adamant by then that this is the choice you want to make so you'll feel stronger about pushing back on their suggestions. I just said that nappies were the right choice for me and I wouldn't be swayed. 

She didn't even suggest we had a follow up appointment last time i was there - she just said to call the clinic if anything changes or I decide that I do want to get some prescription pull ups. 

Also, do you really need to tell the medics? I told them as I wanted to have my incontinence on my medical record (in case I'm hospitalised and am unable to tell them about it myself) but I'm not under any obligation to tell them I'm wearing nappies as it's a personal matter. Maybe that is different if you live outside the UK and have to let medical insurers know.....

Anyway, enjoy your nappies and know that we're all here for you ? 

 

[One Week at a Time]

I hear you @Stuffie Snake. I've been there - constantly needing the loo, having accidents and feeling embarrassed/angry/ashamed about not being able to manage my bladder like everyone else, or being the annoying person in the meeting or on the day out that has to constantly go and use the toilet. When I wasn't on the toilet I was thinking about it and it had, frankly, taken over my life. 

It had taken many years for it to get that bad so l'd just learnt to accept it along the way. Like you, I started to manage it with pull ups but they don't really help as I'd wet in them after about 30 minutes and then was looking for a toilet again for fear of it leaking as they're so thin. And you have to take off all your clothes in toilets with icky floors in order to change them. 

I can't even remember how I came to buy my first 'real' nappy but I do remember how I felt when I put it on. It felt amazing and for the first time in years I felt really safe and comforted. 

I did a few binge/purge cycles with nappy wearing where I longed for the comfort and security of wearing them but then suddenly hated myself for needing them. But I knew i was only putting off the inevitable as my continence was steadily getting worse.

Then over a year ago I finally dived into permanent 24/7 as something finally clicked and I've never looked back since. There were still some doubts and dilemmas at first, as I was allowing what remained of my continence to slip away and I was actively encouraging myself to be a bedwetter in order to stop the instant flooding I experienced when I stood up out of bed. But it's really a case of 'go big or go home' on this one. If you need the capacity of a nappy to enable you to function normally for more than an hour or two, then there isn't really an alternative. 

The continence service were pretty rubbish for me too - the nurse couldn't understand why I wanted to manage my incontinence with nappies and she said I was 'giving in' to it. I had, by that time, been 'not giving in' for almost 20 years and it was exhausting. 

I lost all daytime continence after about 3 or 4 months (it's quite hard to measure it exactly) and I was wetting the bed before I'd reached 10 months. But I have no regrets and I've learned to be kind to myself about it. At least now I can spend my life concentrating on other things - like my career and my love of being outdoors. 

Keep in touch, you will find plenty of support on here from lots of people who have been through what you're going through. I also love this space because it's the only place I know where we can be honest with each other that, actually, nappies rock!

Love Little Belle ?

[Becoming a Bedwetter - When Irreversible?]

8 hours ago, DL2000 said:

So I'm a DL and thinking about to become a bedwetter for multiple years now, I thought about the pros and cons and figured that there are more pros for me personally. I read through various posts in this forum about this topic but in this thread however, I would specifically like to talk about the timeframe when it's basically impossible to stop bedwetting if you become a bedwetter as an adult in case I change my mind and wanna go back to being dry at night.

I experimented a bit in the past and found a good amount of water I can drink before sleeping that ensures I'll wake up in the night so I can start peeing and go back to sleep. I'm certain that doing this over and over eventually leads to the body thinking that it's okay to let go, especially because of the inconvenience of waking up and interrupting the sleep. I would think that re-learning to be dry at night as an adult is harder than being a kid. 

Now the question is... when do you think it's basically permanent to be a bedwetter when starting in adulthood? After the first wet, unrememberable night? After 10, 100? After a few months of this happening?

I would love to hear theories, but also real experiences - I'm sure here are some people that became bedwetters by wearing and using diapers at night.

I would ask @Kif to help you on this one; if I recall correctly, they've had a start then stop and then start again journey with bedwetting so may have a real insight into this. 

[Incontinence Desires and Indecisiveness]

I was pretty much in your position in terms of incontinence when I decided to go 24/7. For me, it was totally the right decision and I love being an incontinent nappy wearer ?

I had a binge and purge about a year prior to that but I've now been 24/7 for over a year.

I would say it took about 4 months for me to feel like I was totally incontinent during the day and nearly a year for night time wetting to kick in. This is obviously quicker than untraining when 100% continent at the start but it was still plenty of time to gauge if the lifestyle felt right.

 

[Honesty Time: For our 24/7 folks, how long does it take you to change your daily diaper?]

I'm only about 5 minutes max to change a wet nappy. I apply cream every time which only takes an extra 10 secs or so but is so worth it as I've found that rashes can jump out at you from nowhere!

I also have multiple places in the house with some supplies so I can change in those rooms without going to the bathroom. I spent far too much time in that place before I went 24/7 so I avoid it now apart from #2s and showering! ?

Making quick changes without a fuss is my number 1 goal with wearing nappies all the time. I enjoy this lifestyle because it's so convenient. If I made a whole thing about nappy changes I may as well be hanging around on the toilet.

That's just my thing, I appreciate some people may really love the ritual.

5 hours ago, diapered_jeff48801 said:

..... but the application takes a couple of minutes due to the rigorous handwashing to remove the paste.  

Just a little hack I have for this - wooden lolly sticks (get them from craft stores) make great applicators and keep the cream off your hands. I wipe any residual cream on the stick off after application onto the fresh nappy padding too. 

[My Journey of 24/7 and Incontinence]

@jonbearab I totally agree with @oznl that this is something you just find easier when you don't overthink it. My opinion is that the 12 month program is all about replacing expert control of your bladder (being potty-trained) with expertly controlling loss of control (untraining). 

As someone who is autistic and a massive control freak myself, I recognise the need to log every sign of progress, set goals etc - I do it with literally everything I do - but I haven't done it with my nappy wearing. I just starting wearing them and enjoying them and had an open mind about where this weird journey would take me.

I especially applied it to being wet at night and decline in my #2 control. One has happened, the other not yet. But I'm not bothered if it never does because the safety and comfort of wearing a nappy is constantly with me whether I use it to it's maximum potential or not. And let's be honest, both of those developments are something of a final frontier in untraining which might not be as desirable once you achieve them.

I will also add that, as a 50-something woman, who has had children and an injury in my 40s, my continence was pretty poor anyway. It sounds like you started with a very good level of continence. So like everything in life, it's difficult to make comparisons with your neighbour as they've walked a very different path. 

Be kind to yourself about what is 'progress' or 'lack of progress' and try and relax and enjoy your life in nappies. There is only one way that your levels of continence will go - ultimately you will be completely incontinent - but avoid trying to control when that will be. 

In the meantime, enjoy your nappies! 

Little Belle ?

 

[How do you get a tight fit?]

11 hours ago, jonbearab said:

Like you, @DiaperboyEddie12, I am on the bigger side and I've struggled with this FOR YEARS!

Until I found a fantastic solution that no one ever talks about. I'm going to divulge my little secret now that's been working for me going on 8 years or so.

Solution? Snug fitting plastic pants.

But wait, there's more!

Try this.

After you're done diapering yourself, stand up and pull up your diaper as snug as you'd like. Make sure your diaper is evenly fitted front to back (if possible, not strictly necessary). Now don on a pair of PUL plastic pants. Make sure they'll fit and be comfortable. The secret is then to pull your plastic pants up nice and snug, being sure to adjust the leg areas first (I like to shift my leg openings from front to back a little so the plastic pants are comfortable while sitting). With your diaper nice and snug (and wrinkle free) and your plastic pants ALL the way up and snug, start folding down the top waistband of your plastic pants evenly across your belly and your back. At some point you'll fold your plastic pants down past the top of your disposable. When this happens, continue folding your waistband down and fold the disposable and the plastic pants together. On a Megamax, you might get 3 or 4 good tight folds.

Keep folding until you get the right fit. Adjust to taste. I like to fold the back side of my diaper down one more than the front for even more snug fit.

As @oznl mentioned, trying to have a tight fitting Abena L4 is a suicide mission... unless you use my method above. Using the method above I need no other supporting garment. I don't use tight compression pants or onesies. Just good old plastic pants and my diapers stay snug and tight fitting until I need to change, with few exceptions.

The downside to this method is that potential leaks from the top front of your diaper are increased. Try not to fold your disposable over so much that you expose the inner pad, but stop just before it.

Don't reply yet. Do it now. I think you'll be pleased. Let me know how it works for you

This is exactly what works for me too and its been a gamechanger! And I love that this method means you don't need to wear overpants which makes things more streamlined AND you can do easy nappy checks through the plastic if you buy transparent ones ? 

[My 24/7 Journey]

4 hours ago, munkey said:

Hey, I never set out to untrain as some have. However, as of recently I’m also only using my diapers.  Its been a slow regression but I’m also not interested in changing whats going on, based on how i got here.. or was already here… i dunno, I haven’t really defined it, nor am I overly interested in doing so.  There is some internal conflict still, but yeah, when you put my sentence in front of me, that is clearly incontinence.  However, this journey started many years ago and was not the result of untraining.  My urinary issues are most likely cause for the last few years I’ve simply gone in my diapers.  As previously mentioned I was having minor issues before I wore diapers.

I hope that clarifies things a bit

I never set out to untrain either but my level of incontinence before going 24/7 meant that I had to make some decisions which have inevitably lead to complete #1 incontinence. Once I decided I needed to wear nappies (not pull ups or pads which became useless) then I had to relinquish what was left of my ability to hold as you have to use your nappy for all #1s once it's on. That meant learning how to wet sitting, driving, walking, lying in bed; which felt like deliberately untraining and so it left me with a lot of conflict/guilt/doubt at first. 

Once I realised how much calmer and happier I was in nappies, I resolved those issues and became at peace with being permanently in them and my reasons for having had to actively untrain the last of my continence.

 

[*2 Year Update - My 24/7 Journey*]

17 minutes ago, carsfan said:

 

What brand of pants did you order off Amazon?

Haian pull on adult plastic pants. 3 in a pack £22.99. I bought medium as I wear medium nappies and they're a good fit - plenty of room to accommodate a full load LOL but small enough to fit nicely. They are HUGE on the side but I just fold them down and the leg seams are fairly tight but as that's where 99% of your leaks come from, it's no bad thing. 

The brands @Beccathelittle recommended just weren't available in the UK. 

[*2 Year Update - My 24/7 Journey*]

@Beccathelittle and @jonbearab - plastic pants have just changed my life! I ordered some off Amazon after your post @Beccathelittle and I've worn them 24/7 since they arrived on Saturday.

@jonbearab you're right they are gamechangers! I think the reason I never considered getting them before was that they seemed a bit too niche or a bit too ABDL for me. But now I'm so glad I realised that I AM actually a bit niche seeing as I wear nappies all day and all night! ?

They've given me sooo much more confidence as I was having plenty of leaks and I was always very conscious of whether or not I was a bit whiffy. As you say, they eliminate worries on both those fronts. And after about a year of being totally IC for #1, I've noticed that I seem to be sliding towards IC for #2 too ? so even more reason to need the confidence and discretion that those bad boys give me.

So thanks for the great advice ? ?

 

[Let's go 24/7!]

Welcome and congratulations on your decision. Wearing 24/7 is such a relief after years of anxiety about leaks and accidents. I've never looked back after nearly 18 months and my continence has completely gone now so it's a good job too ?

I look forward to hearing all about your adventures!

[Not ready to announce to my neighbourhood that I am incontinent]

Just coming back in here to say that I understand all of @rusty pins, @FretaBWet and @Kawaharu POV's on this and it highlights how different we all are and how different our reasons for wearing are. Long may we share and celebrate that diversity ?

However, this is a sub-forum for medical incontinence which is why I posted it here. I have no choice but to wear nappies 24/7 and, to be honest, I'm pretty shy about it. I have a problem with how I can discreetly dispose of my nappies from home and was looking for some advice (or probably really just to have a moan about my local Council! ?).

Deciding not to care who knows about my IC is a big and complex step which I am likely to never take. But thank you for sharing your advice and support.

Love Little Belle ?

[How do you get a tight fit?]

In terms of putting a disposable on tightly, I agree with @Rachel1 on the easiest and best method and I agree with @oznlon the use of compression pants over plastic for a tight overall solution.

However real tightness isn't always the way forward! Yes you need them to not fall down of course but making them too tight on the legs can cause friction rashes and too tight on the waist can cause the tapes to fail and feel very constricted until things bed in and the nappy softens a bit with wearing. I also find that if I wear a tight onesie, that can cause press out leaks on the legs (I've even had a huge capacity ABDL nappy fail at 4 hours in this way). 

I like to feel secure but like there is a little 'space' down there when it's a freshly put on nappy, this gives it physical room to expand as it fills. The advantage of @oznl compression pants is that the tightness is evenly distributed - I find with onesies that it isn't, hence the leaks.

But I suppose like everything it depends on products and individual preferences as to what works best and feels most comfy so it's really just through trial and error. I had loads of leaks and badly fitting nappies in the first month or so of 24/7 wearing whilst I was finding things out. But it's a fun learning curve!

[My morning routine is changing]

1 minute ago, ~Brian~ said:

@Little Belle

OK, Now that I've looked at what you just post it, I realize that I spelt it incorrectly Ha ha ha shame on me however those are what I heard from several interactions from like youtube videos are diaper videos where the lady is from Europe. I knew that I was correct as far as what they would call them, but I didn't realize I had been so silly to misspell it he he he!

Love, And thanks!

Brian

Hehe and I knew I was being pedantic so I'm glad you took it in good humour ? 

I'm impressed at your knowledge of our quirky English ways ?

[My morning routine is changing]

3 hours ago, ~Brian~ said:

@Kif @DiaperboyEddie12

terry towing nappies ?

 

And it's terry towelling Brian ?

Love Little Belle ?

[Not ready to announce to my neighbourhood that I am incontinent]

10 hours ago, rusty pins said:

I think what he is trying to say is even if the bright yellow nappy bin right in front of your house with your house number on it, indicating that the nappy bin belongs at your address at the curb of your specific house, how is anyone who sees it to know that you particularly are the one who is wearing all the used nappies that are in that bin.  It could be any person who is in that house including the idea you may have an elderly person you are caring for in your home who is the one needing the nappies.

I know what you're saying but we are a close neighbourhood where everyone knows each other. I'm just not ready to be that open about it. And neither is my husband as he definitely doesn't want people thinking it's him!

[whats is the first month of going 24/7 like?]

On 1/10/2023 at 6:10 PM, Ivanna P. Friely said:

interoception issues from Autism & ADHD (i.e. not feeling body signals).

I never realised what an issue this was for me! I have spent my whole life going to the toilet based on habit rather than need as I could never feel a need unless it was GO NOW! and therefore far too late. I am convinced that over the years it contributed to an extremely weak pelvic floor as I went far too often to avoid accidents (like every 60 minutes or so if I was at home or everytime I saw a public toilet when out and about). 

[Not ready to announce to my neighbourhood that I am incontinent]

7 hours ago, Wet Knight said:

 

It would be different if it was embossed "Goerge's nappies only in this bin", but one yellow bin among 4 is only a 25% chance of guessing the nappy user.

Agreed but in our neighbourhood, you put the bins on the edge of your property on collection day and they have to have your house number on too ?

[Not ready to announce to my neighbourhood that I am incontinent]

5 hours ago, Wet Knight said:

If, between you there are four bins, how are any of the the members of the public that are interested, going to know that they are your nappies in the Yellow Bin ?

Because on the yellow lid in big embossed letters it says 'NAPPIES ONLY IN THIS BIN' ?

[Just wondering what it feels like to be diapered full time?]

On 1/17/2023 at 4:45 AM, Dprczyone said:

@DiaperboyEddie12My full time wearing is usually about 3 full days a week but like many others here it's the bulk between the legs. One of the reasons I wouldn't wear a thin diaper. The confidence that goes with a good thick diaper is amazing. If I could, I would go 24/7 but with family around a lot I'm just happy I get the time I do. I may never make myself incontinent but it would be fun trying.

If you want to wear full time it's exactly those times around other people that you could wear a thinner nappy. It might not fulfill that love of being thickly padded but better to be less thickly padded than not at all! You'll just need to change more often but it will give you the discretion you need.

[Not ready to announce to my neighbourhood that I am incontinent]

2 hours ago, Stroller said:

Yep.  I'm usually in cloth nappies, but for the past month I've been in disposables as our tumble-drier has been out of action.  The dustbin just got too full, and I suspected it wouldn't be emptied because of the weight of it (we get a fortnightly service).  So I had to take them to the council tip, along with other stuff we needed to get rid of.  The first tip had attendants who were much too attentive - they were helping to unload and checking contents of bags.  So I unloaded the rest of the rubbish there, & took the nappies to a second tip, where I managed to unload them safely into the right container.

Anyway, the drier was fixed the other day, so I'm safely back in cloth nappies again.  Which is a considerable relief.?

That sounds like a right faff too!

To be fair, I did contact the council and asked them about bin weight due to incontinence products and they said that they wouldn't refuse to empty it due to weight even if I'd been offered a bright yellow nappy bin and choose not to have one.

Obviously your council may be different but you could always check with them. 

I'm still trying to keep the weight down a bit though with disposing elsewhere (it still gets heavy enough) but maybe I just need to take them at their word and put them all in it!