For me it's just letting go of control over something that I had mastered before I can even remember. I may be a little of the age of 5 but at that age in my life I was actually cooking peanutbutter toast with a gas oven. I had accidents like most kids, but they were rare and far between, but I remember once being put in diapers, because there was nothing else to were, I was humiliated but also liked it. It wasn't until a little more than a decade ago that I revisited those feelings. It wasn't until my mate died almost two years ago that I really need to explore my little side and what it brings to me.