The Making Of A Toddler: A Diary (Journal entry Wednesday 12/21 Completed 28 Sept)

[The Cle-venger]

Sunday 05/21

 

I knew that there would probably be additional punishment, beyond the spanking I received Friday night, for coming home after curfew.  I had joined a few co-workers for a drink, one turned into two and next thing I knew it was after 9pm.  What did surprise me was the fact that mommy had waited until Sunday morning when I was getting ready for church to announce that I would be required to wear my ‘punishment panties’ until next Sunday.  I’d only had to wear them a couple of times before, only for a day at a time, and NEVER out of the house so I was understandably nervous someone would hear the crinkling or catch a glimpse of the padded underwear somehow and know that it was not what a 32-year-old woman should be wearing. 

 

Having learned not to argue since being thrust back into my second childhood, I begrudgingly took one of the girls Goodnights from the box on my dresser and pulled the shameful garment up my legs. I spent the majority of the service lost in my thoughts about how my life had ended up like this.  Up until six months ago, I was a pretty normal woman, I had a job, my own apartment and plenty of friends.  While I still have my job, and arguably all of my friends even if I haven’t been able to hang out with them of late, it was when I moved out of my apartment and back in with my mother that life took a turn for the worse. 

 

After graduating college with a degree in U.S. History and a minor in Education I had the usual student loans and a little bit of credit card debt.  For several years it was manageable, even on a teacher’s salary in this economy, mostly because I shared an apartment with a friend.  When she eventually got married, I was both thrilled for her, and her maid-of-honor, though it left me with a rent payment that was increasingly difficult to make on my own.  Putting an ad out I had a couple of other women temporarily move in but nothing that turned into a long-term arrangement.  When my lease was up for renewal prior to my birthday I made the worst mistake of my life and asked my mother if I could come live with her.  At first, I thought it was a blessing that she happily agreed and even said I could stay rent free so long as I lived by the rules.  Pick up after myself?  Do my own laundry?  I mean I’m an adult, how hard could ‘living by the rules’ be?  If I had bothered to read the “lease” she had me sign when I moved back in, I would have gone elsewhere.

 

With church coming to a close, I rode in the back seat of my mother’s car towards home.  She took the time to remind me that when at home I was not to cover my ‘punishment panties’ as I needed to be constantly aware I was wearing them so that I would be constantly aware I had been naughty, as if even with them covered I could ignore the padding between my legs.  Switching my dress for a t-shirt I prepared to spend the afternoon locked in my bedroom.  Mother was having her euchre club over and I did not want seven of her friends seeing me in my current state of dress despite the fact they no doubt would be told I was in punishment.  Thankfully, the tournament was done and they were gone by the time I emerged for dinner.

 

Luckily, mommy was pleased with my behavior today and no additional spankings were given, though I did get a warning about spending so much time ‘locked in my room’.  As I lay in bed updating my journal, I can’t help but wonder what it will be like wearing a pullup to school tomorrow.  Will my teaching assistant or any of my students notice something is ‘off’ with me?  If they do, will they say something about it?  Hopefully the outfit mommy picks out for me hides it well enough that it won’t be a problem.  

 

[spark]

Interesting story.  I hope you get into the characters and why Mom might resort to such measures without something causing it.

[The Cle-venger]

Thursday 05/25

Stepping out of the shower I peered over to my bed as I dried myself off.  Mommy had laid out today’s outfit and unlike the first three days of the week in which she opted for discreet pants-suits, today she expected me to wear a yellow sundress.  Granted the temperatures were getting warmer, and if I didn’t have to wear the accompanying princess pullup I wouldn’t have had a issue with it at all, but I think my teaching assistant is starting to suspect there’s something up with me.  Not wanting to have to try hiding a red backside in addition to my purple “punishment panties” I got dressed to start the day.

I was writing information on Sherman’s march to the sea on the classroom blackboard when I heard my teaching assistant Aubrey giggle behind me.  Reflexively, my hand reached back to the hem of my dress to ensure nothing was exposed that shouldn’t be.  Satisfied that my secret remained safe I asked her what was so funny and she proceeded to show me the TikTok video she had been watching.  Soon enough 8th graders began filing into the room and lessons began.

Despite being self-conscious of my attire, I spent the morning repeating the same lecture to each of the three classes that came through the door.  After lunch, I allowed Aubrey to take the lead on instruction which gave me the opportunity to do a little math in regard to my living situation.  According to the ‘lease’, if I were to fail to comply with the rules or were to leave before the expiration of the contract, I would owe rent for the duration of the 36 months I had signed away of my life.  Fair market value being around $1.10 per square foot times the area of my bedroom and half the living room would equal $560/month or a little over $20,000 in three years.  Thank God it was just those two rooms and not half the house.  I’ve managed to pay down the credit card and I’m caught up on the student loans, but I don’t have nearly enough saved to buy my freedom so it looks like I’m stuck for a while longer.

Having survived the day at work, I was on my way out the door when Colleen, a fellow 8th grade teacher flagged me down.  The annual Washington D.C. field trip was two weeks away and as she and I were in charge of planning, she wanted to finalize the last of the details.  Shooting a quick text to my mother to let her know I had to stay late at work, I settled into preparations that seemed to drag on endlessly.  I appreciate how thorough Colleen can be, but everything takes so much longer when we have to go over it three or four times.  Not wanting to have to spend another day on this I agreed when my colleague suggested we adjourn somewhere for dinner and finally by seven o’clock not a single detail had been omitted.

Arriving home, mommy was up in arms at the door about how late I was.  When I tried to explain it was work related she claimed she could smell the glass of wine I had with dinner and accused me of “going out boozing”.  My repeated denials did nothing but ensure I ended up with a few extra spanks with my punishment panties pulled down and a warning about being “irresponsible”.  At least I’ll get a reprieve in a couple weeks when I’m out of town, there’s no way for her to watch me like a hawk from four hundred miles away.
 

[D503]

Great start. She might be eating her words there too at the end.

[The Cle-venger]

Sunday 05/28

Today was officially the worst day of my life.  It had all started so well, I was out of my punishment panties, I got to dress myself for church and the service was quite good.  Even at lunch, mother was actually quite pleasant, it reminded me of the good times before she and dad divorced and he moved across the country.  Not wanting to upset the apple cart I was hanging out in my room binge watching Netflix lest I inadvertently do something to draw her ire when I heard a knock at the front door.  I got up to see who it was before realizing it was most likely someone from the euchre club arriving.

Settling back in, I wasn’t able to get comfortable before mommy shouted for me to come out to the living room.  With a huff I paused my show and trudged on out to find my mother talking with a young girl I recognized from having been in my class a few years prior.  Curious, I asked what was going on, the young girl started laughing hysterically as mommy explained that Erika was there to ensure I didn’t get up to any trouble while my mother was off playing cards.  Unable to stop myself I launched into a perfectly logical argument on how overbearing my mother was being and that I would not allow someone half my age to look after me.

When I finished, mommy did the worst thing imaginable, she ignored me and started talking to Erika about how I wasn’t responsible enough to make smart decisions, saying my “temper tantrum” only served to prove her point that she was doing the right thing.  For her part, Erika was gleefully taking in how she was allowed to punish me with the same authority that mommy had while she was babysitting.  Yes, she used that word.  Babysitting.  I turned to bolt to my room in the hopes of getting my keys and getting the hell out of there but only made it two steps before mommy’s voice froze me in place.  

Because of how “immature” I was acting, I was to go back into punishment panties for the remainder of the day in addition to getting a spanking.   Tears began to stream down my face as I thought about how my life was over.  I didn’t have a choice, not really, I had to do what mommy said and as a result a 19-year-old who had to take summer school after failing my class was now my superior.  I suppose I could have protested harder, but the outcome seemed so inevitable that I simply gave up and did as I was told.  Erika had her phone out to record my walk of shame back to the living room, purple pullup on full display and the subsequent spanking.  

Once we were alone, my former student launched into a series of questions about why my mother was so weird and why I was being treated this way.  Without going into too much detail, I did my best to explain that mommy hadn’t always been like this.  She was a kind, understanding mother when I had been a real child and that after her and my father had separated a couple years ago, she started acting more and more bizarre.  Obviously not nearly as looney as she was now, or I wouldn’t have moved back, an event that seems to have triggered her to go off the deep end.  She had her baby girl back and was determined not to let the world hurt me.  This led to questions of why I didn’t have mommy committed to a psych ward or arrested.  In truth, it’s because I still love my mother, I can’t pawn her off to be someone else’s problem.  If I had the money I would definitely move out, but I wouldn’t abandon her.  I’d try to make her see how ridiculous she’s acting, to bring back the sweet woman who raised me.  

For a minute, it felt good to vent, I just wish I hadn’t done it to a vindictive teenager who was bitter about her failing grade in my class.  Leaning into my mother’s craziness, Erika thought of the perfect way to execute her revenge, get mommy to do it for her.  I am to start having “accidents” so that mommy will keep me in my punishment panties full-time, apparently the idea of me toddling around in soggy pullups is “cute”.  To ensure that I do, my former student downloaded a tracking app on my phone so she’d always know where I was and could stop by without warning to make sure I had my pullup on and that it was wet.  If she ever found me without a pullup on, or that it was dry, she would invite all of her friends over the next time she babysat me.  If I was a good girl and did as I was told then my humiliation would stay between the two of us, an option I considered the lesser of two evils.
 

[D503]

Nice. This could get... messy.

[wetdiaper55]

Nice story. I will like reading this . 

[SGTbaby]

Great so far!

[The Cle-venger]

Wednesday 05/31

Day three of my new routine, wake up, wet the pullup I wore to bed so mommy would force me to put on another one and head off to school.  After Mondays near miss, Erika had been waiting outside to check me in the driveway and I had to hurry up and wet myself, fresh pullups did not stay that way very long and I was soaked before I made it through the door.  I still wasn’t used to the squish that accompanied sitting down in padding soaked with my own urine and with as gingerly as I lowered myself into my chair, Aubrey probably suspected I engaged in some rough anal over the weekend.  Whatever kept her from finding out the truth I suppose.  

Halfway through my second period class there was a knock on the door, Erika was asking to “borrow” me for a moment.  Aubrey took over the lecture and I followed my former student to the restroom.  Once there I lowered my pants to show my yellowed undergarments with the 18-year-old giving the padding a squeeze and giggling.  I was about to pull my pants back into place when the little bitch tugged on the pullup ripping the sides apart and telling me she’d be back later to check me again.  Having not packed any spares, and with no other way to procure one, I called my mother at her work begging her to bring a new pullup.  Unfortunately, she was busy.

For over an hour I kept glancing at the clock nervously until finally lunch arrived.  Dashing out to my car, I sped to a pharmacy a couple miles away, no sense staying too close to school in case Erika was waiting around for a chance to catch me.  I reached a new level of shame when after purchasing a 24-pack of girls Goodnights XL I had to ask the clerk if they had a restroom; no doubt he didn’t suspect anything, but I knew I’d soon be wearing one of the infantile garments.  In short order I was back in my car and in the McDonald’s drive thru to get something to eat as well as take the opportunity to pee my pants.  Needing to go more than I thought, once I started there was no stopping the flow.  My poor pullup was soon overwhelmed, I was sitting in a puddle of my own urine and my pants were ruined.  With no other choice, I called the school to let them know I was going home sick and have Aubrey take over for the rest of the day.

Arriving home I took off my soiled jeans tossing them on the washing machine, went to my room and collapsed in a ball on my bed to cry myself to sleep.  The next thing I knew, a cold cloth was wiping the inside of my leg, mommy had come home and was in the midst of changing my pullups.  Seeing that I was awake, she told me that I was going to the store with her to pick up supplies.  Defeated from my earlier ordeal, I didn’t argue as she put me in the backseat or when she dumped baby wipes, powder and rash cream into the shopping cart.  I did protest the ‘Hello Kitty’ backpack she selected to be my “in case of emergency bag” and the fact I now had to carry it, as well as two spare outfits, pullups and the rest of the supplies we just bought, with me everywhere I went in case of another leak.  

Arriving home, mommy took care of making dinner so that I could clean my car seat and do a load of laundry, in addition to my pants, a bit of pee had also leaked onto my bedsheets while I napped. I spent the rest of the evening daydreaming about the 8th grade trip next week.  Six whole days out from under my overbearing mother’s roof and far enough away that my former student couldn’t possibly pop in for a surprise inspection.  Even though I had only been stuck in pullups for a few days, it would be nice to get back to wearing regular underwear and leaving those infernal things locked safely in my car until my return.  Sure, I’d be trapped on a bus for hours on end with screaming kids who can’t follow directions, but somehow that seemed far better than my current situation.
 

[The Cle-venger]

Sunday 06/04

Unsurprisingly, when it came time for mother to leave for her weekly card game, I found myself at the mercy of my 19-year-old babysitter.  Knowing that after today I’d be free of this nonsense for the next week, I did my best to tolerate her antagonization.  It started with being given dolls and told to play, so I did.  I brushed their hair, made them walk around and talk to each other all the while I had a big dopey smile on my face.  She would look up from whatever she was doing on her phone periodically and tell me I was a “good baby” then go right back to playing on her phone.  

After about forty minutes I was bored out of my mind and starting to need to pee, so I set the dolls down and got up to head to the bathroom.  This was my first mistake; I was told to sit back down and not to leave her sight.  Mistake number two was when I evidently rolled my eyes in response, but not wanting to anger her any further I simply sat back down and continued the monotony of playing make believe with the dolls, I could hold it longer and best not to ask for something when vindictive people are mad at you.  

Another fifteen minutes passed and I was about to politely ask for permission to use my own bathroom when I realized she wasn’t on the couch any more.  Setting down the dolls I headed towards the kitchen to check if maybe she was getting a snack when I heard a yelp behind me.  Whether she actually stepped on it or not is up for debate, but Erika insisted because I was so messy, that in her haste to keep me from “wandering off” she hurt her foot on one of the discarded dolls.  It had to have been a setup, she no doubt was hiding somewhere waiting for me to notice she was gone so that she could swoop in and get me in trouble when I left the living room.  Stupid me had fallen for it, and that was strike three.

Twenty hard spanks reigned down on my sodden pullup as I lay across my former student’s lap.  While not painful in the least, a few stray tears may have leaked down my cheek from the humiliation of it all.  When she was done, I was instructed to stand in the corner and not to turn around or speak until told to do so.  I tried to ask how long, but before I could finish the sentence my unknown timer had been doubled and I scurried off in the direction Erika was pointing.  

 Uncertain of how long I had been standing there, or what my babysitter was doing behind my back, I did my best not to squirm as time slowly ticked away.  With nothing to see, do or listen to, my attention was firmly focused on the growing urgency between my legs.  Vowing to make a break for the bathroom before losing the battle I was hoping that Erika would say my corner time was over, but I was also smart enough to understand she was waiting me out.  I was about to resign myself to further punishment by dashing off to relieve myself like a big girl when a hard swat landed on my posterior, my concentration was broken, and the flood gates opened.

Erika laughed, I cried, and my pee gushed out of my overly saturated pullup, streamed down my legs, then soaked into the living room carpet.  When the torrent stopped, the 19-year-old ripped off the useless padding to leave it where it lay and pulled me over her lap once more.  Blow after blow landed with a thwap on my exposed butt, each one seemingly harder than the last until she must have tired her arm out.  I was ordered to clean up my mess, take a shower and wait for her in my room; wanting to delay the inevitable as long as possible my shower took longer than was absolutely necessary and she sat perched on my bed when I got out.

Dressing me in a night shirt and pullup, my babysitter got me something to eat and tucked me in.  It may have only been six o’clock but honestly I wasn’t too upset by the earlier bedtime, I had to be up extremely early tomorrow in preparation for the field trip and the sooner this day ended the sooner I could get back to some semblance of normality.  Just because I wanted to sleep doesn’t mean I could though.  At some point I heard mommy come home and a discussion between her and Erika but I couldn’t make out what they were saying; but I could certainly guess.    
 

[The Cle-venger]

Monday 06/05

Why the fuck is my alarm going off at 1:30am?!?!  Right, field trip.  Coffee, hair, makeup and it was time to get dressed, in panties not pullups, hurray!  I was out the door and at the school by 3:00am, the two charter buses pulling in shortly thereafter.  Greeting the drivers, we planned comfort stops along the eight-hour route from school to Washington D.C. and as kids began to filter in, I checked them off my list to board.  If all went to plan, we’d arrive mid-afternoon with just enough time to visit a couple monuments before dinner and checking into the hotel for the evening.  

Colleen, being the far more uptight of the two of us, was in charge of bus one, while I was to be in charge of bus two.  The arrangement suited me fine, a little less responsibility and I would have Aubrey along to help with that, the only downside of which was I wouldn’t be able to have my own room in D.C. I’d have to share with my teaching assistant.  At precisely 4:00am the buses lurched forward and we were off, our first stop scheduled for around 7:00am somewhere the kids could get breakfast from a fast-food joint, leaving plenty of time to doze off.

Before I knew it the hiss of the air brakes was waking me up.  Our driver had parked at a McDonald’s with a Burger King and Taco Bell both in close proximity.  Shepherding the children off the bus I reminded them to stay with their chaperones and to be back in forty-five minutes.  My blood ran cold when a familiar voice praised my “good advice” and suggested that I “stick close so I don’t get lost”.  Slowly turning around, I found myself face-to-face with Erika. Evidently, she has a half-sister on the trip and convinced Colleen to let her replace one of the chaperones who couldn’t make it.  

My ‘Hello Kitty’ bag slung loosely off the 19-year-olds shoulder suggested she knew I wasn’t wearing pullups like I was supposed to.  I knew I was in trouble; I’d violated my end of the agreement and could only hope she’d show mercy and not tell anyone my secret.  Silently marching me to a nearby gas station and directly into the restroom, I feared she was going to be disappointed when she opened my “In case of emergency” bag to find I had replaced all the infantile garments with far more mature panties.  Once again, the surprise was on me, it contained not just my pullups, but a stack of adult sized diapers.  Not plain white medical ones either, these appeared excessively bulky and had pictures of rainbows and unicorns on them.  

Handing over a pullup my babysitter explained that she wouldn’t be publicly humiliating me for now, but that I did need to be punished.  I was going to have to not just wear the diapers to bed, but I had to confess to Aubrey that I am a “little baby bedwetter” and that because mommy isn’t here to help, I need her to put the diaper on me.  I wanted to refuse, it was a mortifying thing to have to do, but when I thought of the alternative I was trapped.  Better to discreetly tell one person than for everyone to find out publicly, so I agreed that after dinner I would humiliate myself while Erika listened in via speakerphone.

The remainder of the morning was as mundane as riding on a bus through farmland can be.  Two hours outside the nation’s capitol we stopped for lunch at an enormous truck stop with five restaurants inside.  Just sitting next to Aubrey as we ate, knowing what I was going to have to confess later, made me a bit uncomfortable, but she didn’t seem to notice and soon enough the group had reboarded the bus to continue the journey.  True to Colleen’s carefully crafted schedule we arrived in time to visit the Jefferson, FDR and MLK Jr Memorials before dinner at the mall in Pentagon City.  

When we finally arrived at the hotel, I took charge of reminding the children of their room assignments and distributing keys.  As everyone ran off to enjoy their free time before the 10pm bed check, I nervously followed my teaching assistant into our room.  Discretely dialing Erika’s number, I ensured my cell was on speakerphone before setting it on the end table between the two queen beds where Aubrey and I would be sleeping.  Deep breath in, deep breath out, I stared intently at my feet and blurted out that I am a bedwetter. 

For her part, Aubrey remained quiet as I explained how I was going to need her assistance in putting on my nighttime diaper.  When I finished, that’s when the questions started to fly, do I wet every night, how long has this been an issue, do I ever have daytime accidents, how did I never learn to diaper myself.  Not prepared for the onslaught, I responded with the first thing that popped into my head, yes, since high school, sometimes, and if I put it on myself, I always leak.  

When it came time, my teaching assistant pealed off my jeans to reveal the soggy goodnight that I had been wearing for the majority of the day.  She suggested that I change more often before unfolding one of the bulky unicorn and rainbow diapers Erika had packed in my diaper bag.  Immediately I could tell there was no way I would be able to close my legs, if for some reason I needed to move I would have to waddle.  Snugly taped into the first diaper I had worn since I was three, we said our goodnights and I proceeded to let out the flood that I had been holding back for the last couple of hours.  
 

[Bel George]

I enjoy the quick progression of the story.
Our main character gives in very quickly to the blackmail, but that doesn't bother me, on the contrary. Wondering what else awaits her.

[D503]

Nice. Aubrey seemed to take a no-nonsense approach to the task, though I'm sure she was smiling. She must be fascinated at her submission with babyish diapers and needing help with changes. 

It'll be very interesting to see how the relationship now develops.

[The Cle-venger]

Wednesday 06/07

I am not a morning person to say the least, but being woken up four hours early by the shrill of a fire alarm was a recipe for disaster.  Hurriedly tugging on a pair of jeans over my yellow, sagging night time underwear, I had to tie a jacket around my waist to hide the fact I couldn’t get them buttoned before dashing out the door.  Myself, Aubrey and the rest of the chaperones ensured all the students were out of their rooms before descending the stairs ourselves, the bulk between my legs making the task much harder than it needed to be and firefighters were already heading in before I could make it out.  

For near an hour everyone milled about in the cool Washington air before the fire department gave the all clear to reenter the hotel.  Evidently some asshole was drinking in his room and decided to light up a cigar setting off this mornings chain of events.  It was a close to 0400am when I was able to lie down again, so when the wake-up alarm on my phone beeped at 0630am I wanted nothing more than to roll over and continue to slumber.  Hitting the snooze, that was exactly what I did, not waking back up again until an incessant pounding on the door roused me.  

Once again pulling on a pair of pants and wrapping a jacket around my waist to cover the bulge of my underwear, I wasn’t too surprised to find Erika standing there.  She informed me that I had missed breakfast and that the buses were ready to leave, when I tried to protest that I needed changed she simply grabbed my diaper bag and marched towards the elevator.  Not seeing any alternative, I toddled along behind her.  Reaching the lobby she offered me a pullup and pointed in the direction of the public restroom.  I was able to change into the goodnight in one of the stalls relatively easily; however, when it came time to exit there was a woman standing at the sink.  Not having time to dilly-dally, I swallowed my pride and deposited the soiled diaper in the trash, earning a disgusted look from the stranger for my troubles.

Everyone was cranky from lack of sleep, students and chaperones alike, but we had a scheduled appointment for a tour of the Capitol Building, including group photo to make, so we loaded up and headed out.  Bouncing our way around the beltway, I realized that in my haste to be on time I had neglected to use the bathroom while I was in it.  With a dejected sigh I relaxed my bladder and flooded my pullup, now if Erika checks me, I won’t be in trouble for being found dry.  Damn, I really need to find a way to destroy the evidence on her phone and then get her fired from babysitting so there’s no way for her to get more photos or videos to blackmail me with.  

Reaching our morning destination, forty-eight zombies trudged off the bus with me bringing up the rear.  As I was having everyone gather around so that I could point to where we would be taking the group photo, Aubrey came up behind me and tied her jacket around my waist.  Evidently, my protective underwear had leaked, and she was trying to hide the evidence before anyone else noticed.  Thankfully, it seemed to have worked as the only person to say anything was Erika, who teased me about needing to keep spare clothes in my diaper bag.  

The remainder of the day passed uneventfully, the kids were too tired to act up and everyone was happy to return to the hotel for our catered dinner.  Despite the early hour, once we had eaten, Aubrey and I went up to our room ready to pass out.  As my teaching assistant was taping me into my nighttime protection, she casually suggested that between leaking this morning and the fact I’d been wet every day this week when it came time to get ready for bed, that I consider wearing something a little more absorbent during the day.  I like her, she’s very sweet and understanding, but I will be glad when the year is out and she moves on to get a full-time job elsewhere and I’ll never have to see her again.  It’s hard to think of yourself as someone’s equal after they’ve wiped the urine from your crotch.

[Guilend]

I'm surprised her mother wasn't spanking her for wetting her pull ups. Can't wait till the babysitter makes her poop herself, maybe make her poop her pull up in front of her mother. That would be fun.

[zzzz50]

Wouldn’t Aubrey have been able to wake her up? Seems like that should have been addressed. Maybe they both overslept and Erika changes her diaper while Aubrey uses the bathroom.

[D503]

I'd say Aubrey let her sleep and took the kids to breakfast

[Diaperingdaddy]

I love where this is going!

[The Cle-venger]

Sunday 06/11

I can’t even begin to describe how awkward it is to be listening to a sermon while peeing your pants.  I was back in pullups after having to spend my Saturday in Erika’s stupid diapers so I could prove that I didn’t need them, though this little ‘accident’ I was required to have certainly wouldn’t help maintain the promotion.  This is all a result of mommy waiting up when I arrived home late Friday night.  She noticed I was wearing one of my nighttime diapers, Aubrey had been fearful I’d fall asleep on the bus and embarrass myself, and I had to explain that begrudgingly I had caved to my assistant’s suggestion and wound up wetting multiple times.  My mother was hesitant to allow me back into pullups without testing my ‘suddenly failing potty training’, a notion that was only able to dissuade when I showed I could still make it to the bathroom.

Discreetly checking to ensure I hadn’t leaked, I stood up to join the recession at the end of service and vowed this would be the day I got rid of my ridiculous babysitter.  While my mother was at euchre this afternoon, I’d ask her how much more retribution she wanted and record her vindictive answer on my phone.  Then all I’d need to do is “accidentally” break her phone before playing the recording for mommy and having her fired.  She wouldn’t be able to post any embarrassing photos or videos and she certainly wouldn’t be invited back to get more.  

Arriving home my mother made me change out of my wet pullup, not that I could blame her as sitting around in my own pee was kind of gross, and I hid in my bedroom until I could wet myself again lest my babysitter catch me in a dry pullup and I incur her wrath.  By mid-afternoon I was finally able to emerge without fear of retribution and headed to the living room to put the plan I put together at church into action.  To my surprise, my mother and all of her friends were gathered around their respective card tables.  Desperate to hide my sagging underwear from the group I tried to bolt back to my bedroom but alas I was too slow.

Being admonished for a second accident in one day I wanted to defend my honor but knew it would fall on deaf ears.  When one of my mother’s friends piped up how her granddaughter could make it to the potty on time, I involuntarily let out a smart-ass reply, it did not go over well.  Because I was throwing a “tantrum” mommy escorted me to my room where she proceeded to put one of my nighttime diapers on and told me to take a nap.  In an effort to comply I laid down but could only think of the humiliation of people who were basically strangers seeing me in my sodden undergarments.  Why did none of them think this was strange?  Though if they were only getting my mother’s side of things, they no doubt thought I was an out-of-control pants wetter and this was what I deserved.  Ugh.  

Not tired, I resumed playing games on my phone and fuming about the level of control my babysitter had over me even when she wasn’t around.  As if on cue, I received a text stating she knew I was at home and that I had to send a photo within five minutes proving I had ‘piddled in my pants’.  Unable to force myself to pee after having just gone, I did my best to explain the situation including that mommy had put me in a diaper instead of a pullup and sent a picture in the hopes of leniency.  A laughing face emoji, along with, “I can’t believe it worked” was the only response I got; evidently having it be my mother’s idea to keep me in crinkly underwear was part of some master plan, one which it seemed was progressing better than my tormentor could have hoped.
 

[The Cle-venger]

Sunday 06/18

I had made it nearly a week without running afoul of my mother’s or my babysitter’s madness.  While there were no drastic improvements to my new lifestyle, I was allowed to wear pullups during the day so long as I didn’t leak, and mommy had even gone to dinner with a friend without having Erika come over to watch me one night.  Of course, diapers were still mandatory for bedtime, and my tormentor, despite not babysitting the entire week, still checked to ensure I was wearing soggy underwear, once via text and once showing up to my classroom after the students had gone home and I was grading final exams.  But I was doing all the little things, such as skipping teacher’s night out, to make them believe I was a good little girl and it was working.  Until yesterday.

My former roommate and her husband invited me to go out on their boat with them for the day, she thought it would be a fun way for me to celebrate the end of the school year.  Surprisingly, mommy agreed for me to go so long as I did not drink and was home by 10pm.  Opting for a bikini instead of pullup, I conveniently ‘forgot’ my phone at home so Erika wouldn’t be able to track me down and headed to Rebecca’s house where I was greeted by a warm smile and my choice of tasty adult beverages.  Nine in the morning here must be five o’clock somewhere, and so long as I quit early enough to be sober by the time I went home nobody would ever know.

By lunch the alcohol was flowing through me and we had found a place to anchor the boat and go swimming.  Snacking on sandwiches and an h’orderves tray, I nearly choked on a cheese cube when pee started running down my leg.  My friend laughed at how drunk I must be while I worried about how used to wearing pullups I had become.  Apologizing profusely I took a wet rag and sanitizer and in no time the deck was good as new and my accident was forgotten.  

At some point mid-afternoon Rebecca was absolutely hammered, showing off the endowments God had given her to passing boats and trying to coerce me into doing the same.  Finally relenting, I ripped off my top and started swinging it around above my head, but instead of the whistles and cheers I expected, all I heard was an angry woman’s voice on a bullhorn.  The rather irritated marine patrol officer lectured about responsible behavior before issuing me a citation for indecent exposure and public intoxication.  Knowing someone else would be sermonizing about the same thing when I got home, I’d have to borrow the money to pay my fines from her, I figured that since I was already going to be in trouble I may as well get drunk.  

By the end of the night I lost count of how many drinks I had and Rebecca had to find me an Uber to get home, needless to say, mommy was livid.  Spanked and taped into my crinkly underwear, I was sent to bed to await the inevitable consequences, which is how this morning I wound up sitting in a playpen wearing naught but a thoroughly soaked diaper.  It had been decided that since I liked showing off my boobs so much that they should be constantly on display unless I was going into public.  Erika was here babysitting while my mother was at church, the glee in her eyes undoubtedly from being told she should brainstorm ways to punish me properly.  I had already been told my pullup privileges were revoked and that I wasn’t allowed to comment on the state of my diaper or to try to take it off on my own, if I did, the time before I would be changed would be delayed.  First time would be by one hour, second time by two and so forth, I had already earned sixty extra minutes in my about to leak undergarment.  

Agonizingly slow, the timer ticked down to zero and I stared pleadingly at my babysitter.  For her part she looked up from her phone briefly then resumed scrolling through whatever she was looking at.  Poking at my padding a few droplets of urine escaped the confines to dribble down onto the plastic floor of my playpen, inadvertently, I muttered about leaking, thankfully Erika didn’t seem to hear.  Another few minutes passed before she laid out the supplies and began the task of replacing my sodden diaper with a fresh one.  Not long after mommy arrived home and the pair of them talked in hushed tones about suitable punishments, I tried listening in but only caught a few words here or there, ‘potty’, ‘childish’ and ‘conference’.  Oh shit.  My mother is scheduled to be a guest speaker at a conference this week, I’d almost completely forgotten.  Does that mean I’m going to be stuck with Erika all week?  

Over lunch, mommy explained what she and Erika had decided.  There would be five age levels I would be treated as depending on my behavior, I could either move up or down depending on how good I was.  Since I had so egregiously sinned last night I would be started at toddler level, I’d have all the privileges and responsibilities of someone that age which included use of the potty for number two; however since I was being punished with diapers all my pee would go in my pants.  The other levels included ‘baby’, in which I wouldn’t be allowed use of the potty at all, ‘grade schooler’ where I had to wear pullups but could fully use the bathroom, ‘high schooler’ still included pullups but I would be given more freedom, and finally I could get my life back if I graduated all the way to ‘adult’.  I vowed to myself that I’d do whatever it took to be a good girl.
 

[The Cle-venger]

Tuesday 06/20

Having not worn a shirt or bra since Sunday morning when I woke up, I was a little surprised when I was dressed in both following my morning change.  Erika informed me that she needed to run some errands, a quick trip to the bank and then a little bit of shopping.  When I asked why I needed to go with her, she responded that I was just a toddler and toddlers need someone to watch them, so if I really wanted to stay home I could, but she’d have to call some of the moms she met on the field trip and ask if they kids were available to babysit.  Horrified by the thought, I may have trickled into my diaper as she buckled me in the backseat of her car.  A short drive later we arrived at the bank.

 Inside my babysitter removed a wad of cash from her purse, filled out a deposit slip and proceeded to the teller.  I knew my mother was most likely paying her well, but even after putting $500 into her checking she still had plenty of cash left over for shopping.  Taking my hand, she escorted me across the street to the pharmacy and proceeded directly to the incontinence aisle.  My cheeks were practically glowing at the sight of so many diapers, but thankfully she didn’t hand me any packages to carry, instead she picked up powder, wipes, rash cream and a bottle of suppositories.  Gulping at the implication, it was strangely comforting when she took my hand again.  

Returning to the car, it was off to a medical supply store for what she called “essentials”.  Turns out a plastic mattress protector sheet and bed rails were the necessities we were there to retrieve, both of which were secured to my bed upon our return home.  Instructing me to lay in bed, she put the rails up and then had me see if I could escape.  With ease I lowered the rails, immediately she pulled me across her lap and started raining down swats to my padded posterior.  Evidently if the rails were up I had to stay put and wait for an adult to let me out, a point she accentuated by returning the rails to the raised position and telling me to take a nap while she got lunch ready.

With my phone in the living room and not being tired, I didn’t have much to entertain myself with as I tossed and turned.  Reflecting on my demotion from independent woman to diapered toddler, I couldn’t help but think I’d let it all happen far too easily.  Did I have an option though?  Perhaps at the start I could have pushed back harder against my mother, but aside from some unorthodox punishments it really wasn’t that bad.  Hiring a babysitter was a bit extreme, though even that I could rationalize as her being overprotective of her little girl after my father had walked out, she didn’t want to lose me too.  I suppose that’s why I endured the weirdness; I didn’t want to abandon her too, even after the introduction of Erika.

Worrying about mommy was one thing, how come I’ve never fought back against Erika?  Because I was afraid she’d post pictures and embarrass me?  Well, yes.  But I hadn’t even tried to stand up for myself, I couldn’t bring myself to lower the rails of my makeshift crib, an offense that wouldn’t warrant the release of any photos.  As I released a warm stream of pee into my pants I realized that perhaps there was something wrong with me.  Was all of this happening because deep down I think I deserve it?  

My babysitter came back to lower the rail and release me before I could delve too deeply into that hornet’s nest.  Following lunch we spent most of the afternoon playing board games on the living room floor, only to be interrupted by my need to make use of the bathroom.  Before I could go number two, I had to do a childish song and dance, today she requested “I’m a little teapot”.  Then I had five minutes to rush to the bathroom, take care of my business and be back to my changing mat to be rediapered or I’d lose my potty privileges for 24 hours.  Needless to say, I waited until I was close to having an accident before asking to ensure I’d be in and out as fast as possible.  

After dinner she put on a Disney movie for me to watch while she played on her phone.  When 8pm rolled around, I was changed into my overnight diaper, complete with booster pad and put to bed.  So far this week hasn’t been as humiliating or awkward as I thought it would be.  Or maybe I’m just becoming desensitized to my new life.
 

[Guilend]

She'll probably give her a few suppositories before going home at one point so she'll poop her diaper in front of her mommy

At least she's not getting sexually aroused by any of this treatment or it would be even more embarrassing during diaper changes. Though I wonder how long she can go without touching herself 😂.

[The Cle-venger]

Wednesday 06/21

At some point during the night I half woke up needing to pee.  Relaxing my bladder, I was back to sleep shortly after I finished, I didn’t wake again until I felt a couple fingers slipping through the leg hole checking to see how wet my diaper was.  Deemed fine for now, I bit my tongue as I didn’t want to earn an extra two hours in my sodden underwear and followed my tormentor downstairs for breakfast.  Hopeful that it would result in the change I desired, I informed my babysitter that I needed to stop by the school today to finish off my year end activities.  I needed to clear out my classroom and submit final grades, I was fairly confident my co-workers would have taken care of this Monday or Tuesday so they could move on to summer break so today the school should be deserted.  

For her part Erika acknowledged my request and plopped a bowl of cereal in front of me.  Finishing off my cheerios, I took the opportunity to add to the wetness strapped to my waist and awaited my babysitter dressing me for the day.  Instead of changing me first, she selected a knee length red dress, grabbed my diaper bag and led me to the car.  I could see where this was going and I didn’t like it, fully aware that I was sentencing myself to at least two more hours in my sopping wet diaper I asked if I could get a fresh diaper before we left to ensure I wouldn’t have to have my soggy pants replaced at the school. 

Having thwarted her plan, my tormentor found another way to make me squirm, forcing me to hold her hand as we walked down the hall to my classroom.  Fortunately, the building was mostly deserted as I’d hoped and I was able to take care of everything I needed to officially be done for the summer in a little over an hour.  Needing to pee again, but afraid I’d leak if I did, I waited until she had buckled me into her back seat before letting loose.  It would serve her right to have to clean my pee from the cushion.

Instead of heading straight home, we pulled into Starbucks and I silently prayed for the drive-thru.  A quick thanks to the big man upstairs and I was pestering my babysitter to let me get a coffee as well.  We settled on hot chocolate, joined the queue to pick up our order and Erika commanded me to pull up my dress so she could check my diaper.  Not wanting to delay, lest we make it to the window, I complied by showing off my yellowed crotch.  

Back home, having not leaked after all, I was stripped naked and redressed in only my crinkly underwear while Erika changed herself into a bikini.  Spreading out a blanket in the shade I was far more nervous about my state of undress than my tormentor, who gave me a book to read so she could do the same as she laid out in the sun.  I was trying to ascertain whether or not the neighbors would be able to see anything over the fence when a soft moan caught my attention.  Erika was leaning back in a lawn chair, book in one hand, exposed breast in the other.  Captivated, I watched in awe as she tweaked her nipple before her fingers slid lower.  Moving them slowly at first, then faster and faster, it didn’t take too long before her back arched and she squealed in delight.  

Mouth agape at what I had witnessed, I didn’t respond when my babysitter smiled at me and asked if I had made my diapee wet.  She resumed reading her romance novel and I tried to comprehend the range of feelings coursing through me.  Curiosity how she could masturbate so openly, envy at being able to do something so adult, revulsion as I’m not attracted to women, and lust/humiliation because despite being heterosexual, I was quite turned on by the performance.  

When Erika determined she’d had enough sun, we ventured back indoors for lunch, after which I was put down for a nap.  Voices from downstairs woke me sometime later.  Not sure who could possibly be here I wanted to sneak out to see what was going on but my makeshift crib rails were up and I was scared whoever it was might catch a glimpse of me shamefully dressed as I was so I poutily stayed put.  Attempting to drift back to sleep my mind wandered to earlier events and my hand made its way to the front of my diaper.  For someone trying to be discreet the crinkling was deafeningly loud and before I could figure out what to do about it my babysitter chastised me from the doorway.  

Leading me downstairs, she lectured about how touching my diaper was not appropriate for a toddler and that I would need to earn my way to highschooler level before I could even think about doing what she had.  Frustrated, I encountered another problem upon reaching the living room, apparently the noises I heard were from a delivery and spread across the floor were four cases of diapers.  With 36 unicorn and rainbow plastic prisons per case for a grand total of 144, it looked like I’d be peeing my pants for the foreseeable future.
 

[The Cle-venger]

Thursday 06/22

Another morning, another drenched diaper, though this is the first-time leaking onto my sheets. With as much as I was forced to drink on a daily basis it was hardly a surprise, all the liquid had to come back out, so of course I had wet before going to bed and hazily woken up twice during the night. Soon enough I was changed, fed breakfast and dressed to go out once more. After having been paraded around in public the last two days I was hoping to avoid another opportunity for someone to discover my secret.  Unfortunately, my babysitter informed me she had a dental appointment she was unable to reschedule.

Trying to argue that her appointment was not something I needed to attend, my attempt to stay home was countered with an offer to call the mothers she had met on the field trip to see if any of their kids were available to come watch me.  Horrified by the thought, I scurried out to her car and we were on the way to what became an exceedingly long time sitting around the waiting room reading old magazines.  Finally, the receptionist called Erika to the back and she insisted I follow along.  Another few minutes of sitting around had me debating asking permission to use the potty but fear the hygienist would walk in kept me silent.

With x-rays, oral exam and teeth cleaning completed, I knew we’d have time before the dentist came in, and with my situation getting close to untenable I made my ask.  Halfway through a rendition of ‘Baby Shark’ the hygienist came back in to grab a folder but I was beyond caring what she thought so long as I got to use the restroom.  Finished with my performance, I sprinted out the door, down the hallway and across the waiting room making all kinds of unladylike noises, with each adding a spray of mush to the seat of my pants.  Reaching my destination, the door wasn’t fully closed when my body provided it’s final betrayal, squatting down to finish filling the back of my diaper until it was bulging.  

Tears streamed down my faces as my babysitter took my hand, I was so stunned and disgusted with myself I failed to realize we were headed back to the exam room until she was helping me into a chair. Feeling my mess ooze into every nook and cranny of my padded underwear, I wanted nothing more than to beg for a change.  Erika, however, simply said it was too big a mess to deal with here and that she doesn't want to get it all over my clothes.  Wanting to sink into the floor as she apologized to the dentist about her special needs friend, I quietly wept through the remainder of the appointment and the waddle of shame out to the car.

Laying on the bathroom floor, I almost felt bad for Erika having to wipe as much of the nastiness off me as she could.  Turning on the shower she had me step in while she disposed of my well soiled diaper.  Eyes closed, I let the hot water flow over me.  Suddenly, there was a body pressed up behind me, one hand wrapped around my waist, the other rubbing a soapy washcloth between my legs.  Both horrified and horny, I wanted her to stop and keep going at the same time.  Reflexively, I opened my legs wider to allow better access to my nethers, letting out a soft moan as my babysitter whispered in my ear how I was a little girl who can’t help but poop her pampers.  

I wanted to argue, I wanted to orgasm, I ended up doing neither.  Pronounced clean, I was sealed once again in my plastic underwear and put down for a nap.  Emotionally exhausted, I didn’t wake again until mid-afternoon with my belly rumbling, this time from hunger.  A late lunch of chicken nuggets with tater tots and I couldn’t help but feel like the little girl Erika said I was, especially when she suggested playing Monopoly, a game I haven’t played since middle school.  The simplicity of the board game was oddly comforting, helping me to put my earlier embarrassment behind me and to realize that, despite being unnecessary, Erika was a good babysitter.  Somehow, without even wanting to, I was willing to surrender more and more control of my life over to her.  
 

[BabyLock]

Point of order - The Making Of A Toddler: A Diary (Chapter Twelve- 02 September)

(Chapter Twelve- 02 September)

There are no Chapter numbers posted for any of the postings - only date time

 

No problem with the story in progress - excellent work !!!!!