Bad Dreams

[DailyDi]

Didn't sleep well last night, kept having dreams about my abusive first step-father. I was a kid and he was looking for a reason to beat me, so I was trying but failing to be perfect.

Obviously down today from the emotional carry-over, but I'll be okay.

[~Brian~]

53 minutes ago, DailyDi said:

Didn't sleep well last night, kept having dreams about my abusive first step-father. I was a kid and he was looking for a reason to beat me, so I was trying but failing to be perfect.

Obviously down today from the emotional carry-over, but I'll be okay.

@DailyDi

Occasionally, I will get these strange nightmare where i am in one of three situations:

ONE:  When I was a young kid, they sent me to Pediatric Rehab twice.  They mistreated/abused/took advantage of me and others, and I still have bad dreams about that place.  They hung all these "consequences" over our heads if we didn't comply.  THAT is where I think my DL side came from.  If you read my journey thread, it will tell you some of the things that happened to me, and how I had to "fight like I was in jail".

TWO: I sometimes will have dreams where My Dad, My Mom and Myself are in a Ford Bronco, and we are going home after an event.  I used to live on a street that was a LONG winding hill, (behind where I live now) and for some reason, we get up to the TOP of this hill, and lose the brakes!  We then ROLL END OVER END OVER END down this hill, and we cant STOP - We hit everything (Walls, Trees, Houses, signs, and everything else),  and BOUNCE like Ping Pong balls down the hill.  The ONLY way we stop is to hit the last house BEHIND the wall:  We hit the house so HARD We all die, except for me.

THREE:  i have dreams where my parents are in a room, and they are trying to talk to me, but it sounds like gibberish, and I am trying to understand.  I get PUNISHED for not understanding, and then for some REASON, some minutes later, I CAN understand what they say, but Dad keeps talking in gibberish, Mom tells me to go to him, he tries to KILL me, and then I run:  I end up finding a cat in a TREE, and he's Nice to me, and then he helps me deal with the situation.  In The end, Dad puts me in bed, and the cat SCRATCHES me, and I DIE!

My question is:  where the heck do I keep getting these dreams?  Especially #2 and #3!  I've had these dreams, and they SUCK!!!   Lucky for me I have my orangutan Amy and my rabbits Tiny, Tommy, Timber, Tonya and Jackie:  YIKES!!  I am at the point that I go NOWHERE without a Rabbit with me, for stress relief, and properly diapered and protected.  Thanks to @TinyBunny suggesting it, and when she said how SOFT they were, she was NOT lying:  I LOVE them, and they have helped me so much!

I am glad that you are OK:  being abused is NOT OK, and even if the SOURCE of the abuse is no more, the feelings and emotions are STILL there for a LONG while, and even though my stint in rehab was in the 70's, and That was a LONG time ago, I still feel trauma ***HUGS**. My brother Richard was also disabled, and lived in a facility, and one day, Dad and I took a walk:  scared the hell outta me, because everyone was locked behind doors with rectangular windows where we walked, and they were screaming and yelling,while where my brother was, it reminded me of a book cover of one of @Kita Sparklesbooks:  Cute, Airy, Lovely, colorful! 

Hang in There my friend, you are NOT alone, but sometimes I wish I could get rid of dreams like this

Brian

[spoonchicken]

Life itself is a bad dream that I can't seem to wake up from 

[Crinklz Kat]

I seem to have bad dreams all to often anymore.   Still have nightmares regarding my previous high-stress job. But I also have all to frequent dreams of death.