How can I cough and pee instead of coughing and clenching?

[Goerge]

I'm pretty good at renaming relaxed and wetting at the slightest urge.

[~Brian~]

4 hours ago, Goerge said:

I'm pretty good at renaming relaxed and wetting at the slightest urge.

@Goerge

Part of the deal is that you must remain relaxed at all times period when you cough and you clench, I think it is because you are trying to stop yourself From sneezing all over everything, and that's why you clench up. when somebody has incontinence, and I believe it's the stress type, the minute you feel it or you start laughing or doing anything, you end up losing control because you can't laugh cough and hold at the same time. You either have to laugh and release or end up releasing and laughing, but then of course that may sound silly.

If you really have to go really badly, you may not have the choice of being able to hold it, and the minute you start doing anything you may just have everything relaxed and Just go as needed. if you're planning on going 24/7 like you have sated in the past, the best way to do it is to just let it happen wearing 24/7, and since you have all the necessary tools you need, no one should be giving you any grief about it. Normally when you sneeze, you may end up holding because you don't wanna sneeze all over something you sometimes and you may have to use Your diaphragm muscles to hold back the sneeze, but everybody knows if you really have to sneeze bad enough you're not going to be able to hold it. it would be like somebody asking you to sneeze, and you try to fight it, and then somebody puts pepper in your nose, then you won't be able to resist the refuge and you will be sneezing.

You may be able to cough a little bit or sneeze, and then maybe a little bit will come out and then you cough again or sneeze and then the rest of it happened. you have to overcome one barrier and that is that your body has to have enough liquid within it so that regardless of what you do, when you finally release your body has no choice but to release whatever it holds. the way you do that is to overlord yourself with liquid but not to the point where you are going to drown yourself in your own liquids. it takes time and practice, but I'm sure you will be able to handle that with time and practice.

Brian

 

[babyzoey]

I had kids 

[Little Belle]

7 hours ago, babyzoey said:

I had kids 

Me too ?

[Kif]

And I had GCS ?

But in all seriousness, just give it time. And possibly considering practicing it, fake-coughing and staying relaxed at the same time.

[fillemup]

I frequently pee or poop while coughing or sneezing due to total incontinence caused by a ruptured disc in my lower back. I am always coughing due to I have COPD and that has caused you accident rate to become more frequent when it causes me to pee. As far as pooping, I don’t know I need to poop until I either get a contraction and the poop starts coming out within a few seconds or if I start coughing or sneezing I can load my diaper up with poop with absolutely no notice.

[DiapergirlWB]

Really it just takes time patience and practice.  My first issues with it started in the gym, now any strain really and i'll be wetter thn before

 

 

[babykeiff]

Before one coughs, they tend to alter the tension within their pelvic floor group of muscles. If the connecting tissues between the pelvic floor muscles and the sphincters are not over stretched, the act of coughing (which causes pressure on bladder and/or bowels) does not cause bladder / bowel leakage. If the connecting tissue is overstretched, the sphincters cannot handle the extra pressure and tends to leak.

As others have stated correctly, what one needs to do so that they can leak from coughing / laughing etc is to be in a constant state of relaxation. As a result, when the bladder reaches any pressure level, you leak urine before the bladder has a chance to fill to your level. This takes practice and is habit forming. What you need to do is increase your water intake so that every time you stand, the weight of your internal organs placing pressure on your bladder causes the bladder to void. Repeating this process enough times and the bladder will 'remember' it and start to void as soon as the stretch sensors identify some expansion. It is your mind that remembers this behaviour and will look for reference to this, which is your actual behaviour of wetting and messing as soon as any content entered the bladder / bowel = the voiding behaviour you had as a baby before you were toilet trained.

@Little Belle, @babyzoey,

Child birth usually does not cause issues with bladder / bowels unless complications occur that require surgical intervention. During pregnancy, the mass of a child does decrease ones bladder capacity due to physics. Your bladder does not have the space to expand that it used to have prior to carrying a child. As a result, voiding frequency plus urgency increases to cause some, during pregnancy, to have some leakage issues. Since the body is a master at adaption, this should revert to normal post child birth but it is the methodology of how one was toilet trained that is the major factor here. If ones toilet training was all about frequency rather than increasing sphincter strength, then one is toilet trained based on the 'Pavlov Dog' methodology where ones toilet training is more about fluid consumption / reduction and timing than reacting to ones internal signals. As a result, body changes usually cause issues with controling bladder / bowels. It is not that child birth caused lack of control - it is that control was weak to non existant before pregnancy and one did not adapt to the body changes. This type of timed voidings toilet training can also be seen as the person usually at times of stress / tiredness (due to forgetting to void prior to going to sleep and also not reducing fluid intake early enough) will bed wet. These people also would have history of day and night issues during puberty due to inability to adapt to physical changes. It is also common for these people to never have gained full daytime control - ie have some leakage signs within undergarments, but have been managing this for years and believing that it was normal to have slight leakage over the period of the day. In both genders this is portrayed by dribbling post voiding.

Toilet Training Methodologies ...

- Frequency. In this method, the trainee sits / or is put sitting on a potty every n minutes and is praised / rewarded for making a deposit. Once a deposit is made, the time between sitting on the potty is increased in duration by 5-10 minutes. i.e. an alarm is set to remind the trainee to sit on a potty every 15 mins, and then on successful deposit, the duration between sitting is increased to 25 minutes and this process is repeated until the trainee can last for 120+ minutes between wetting. This is the Pavlov Dog training, where one it told to void on the sound of a bell / time trigger / internal clock rather than in response to the stretch sensors on ones bladder / bowels.

- Sphincter Strength. In this method, the trainee is asked every n minutes do they need to use the potty, but only sits on the potty when they confirm that they do need same. If they state NO, then even if the teacher is aware that the trainee is going to soil themselves, this behaviour is ignored until the trainee has finished. The trainee is in normal clothes (t-shirt / underwear) where they need to strip to use the potty. The duration between asking is increased as before, when the trainee remains 'dry' and clean. If, however, the trainee fails to make it between the time periods, the time is reduced to the previous milestone. If the trainee wet/soils his/herself during the time of stripping, nothing is said about it, but the trainee is just cleaned, and redressed in fresh underwear. 'Training' pants is not required. If the trainee manages to strip and get to the potty and make a deposit, then praise is given and the time period between reminders is increased.

Disaproval is never shown, only acceptance and praise on making a deposit in the potty. In a childs mind, they will seek praise and approval.

[Little Belle]

19 hours ago, babykeiff said:

Before one coughs, they tend to alter the tension within their pelvic floor group of muscles. If the connecting tissues between the pelvic floor muscles and the sphincters are not over stretched, the act of coughing (which causes pressure on bladder and/or bowels) does not cause bladder / bowel leakage. If the connecting tissue is overstretched, the sphincters cannot handle the extra pressure and tends to leak.

As others have stated correctly, what one needs to do so that they can leak from coughing / laughing etc is to be in a constant state of relaxation. As a result, when the bladder reaches any pressure level, you leak urine before the bladder has a chance to fill to your level. This takes practice and is habit forming. What you need to do is increase your water intake so that every time you stand, the weight of your internal organs placing pressure on your bladder causes the bladder to void. Repeating this process enough times and the bladder will 'remember' it and start to void as soon as the stretch sensors identify some expansion. It is your mind that remembers this behaviour and will look for reference to this, which is your actual behaviour of wetting and messing as soon as any content entered the bladder / bowel = the voiding behaviour you had as a baby before you were toilet trained.

@Little Belle, @babyzoey,

Child birth usually does not cause issues with bladder / bowels unless complications occur that require surgical intervention. During pregnancy, the mass of a child does decrease ones bladder capacity due to physics. Your bladder does not have the space to expand that it used to have prior to carrying a child. As a result, voiding frequency plus urgency increases to cause some, during pregnancy, to have some leakage issues. Since the body is a master at adaption, this should revert to normal post child birth but it is the methodology of how one was toilet trained that is the major factor here. If ones toilet training was all about frequency rather than increasing sphincter strength, then one is toilet trained based on the 'Pavlov Dog' methodology where ones toilet training is more about fluid consumption / reduction and timing than reacting to ones internal signals. As a result, body changes usually cause issues with controling bladder / bowels. It is not that child birth caused lack of control - it is that control was weak to non existant before pregnancy and one did not adapt to the body changes. This type of timed voidings toilet training can also be seen as the person usually at times of stress / tiredness (due to forgetting to void prior to going to sleep and also not reducing fluid intake early enough) will bed wet. These people also would have history of day and night issues during puberty due to inability to adapt to physical changes. It is also common for these people to never have gained full daytime control - ie have some leakage signs within undergarments, but have been managing this for years and believing that it was normal to have slight leakage over the period of the day. In both genders this is portrayed by dribbling post voiding.

Toilet Training Methodologies ...

- Frequency. In this method, the trainee sits / or is put sitting on a potty every n minutes and is praised / rewarded for making a deposit. Once a deposit is made, the time between sitting on the potty is increased in duration by 5-10 minutes. i.e. an alarm is set to remind the trainee to sit on a potty every 15 mins, and then on successful deposit, the duration between sitting is increased to 25 minutes and this process is repeated until the trainee can last for 120+ minutes between wetting. This is the Pavlov Dog training, where one it told to void on the sound of a bell / time trigger / internal clock rather than in response to the stretch sensors on ones bladder / bowels.

- Sphincter Strength. In this method, the trainee is asked every n minutes do they need to use the potty, but only sits on the potty when they confirm that they do need same. If they state NO, then even if the teacher is aware that the trainee is going to soil themselves, this behaviour is ignored until the trainee has finished. The trainee is in normal clothes (t-shirt / underwear) where they need to strip to use the potty. The duration between asking is increased as before, when the trainee remains 'dry' and clean. If, however, the trainee fails to make it between the time periods, the time is reduced to the previous milestone. If the trainee wet/soils his/herself during the time of stripping, nothing is said about it, but the trainee is just cleaned, and redressed in fresh underwear. 'Training' pants is not required. If the trainee manages to strip and get to the potty and make a deposit, then praise is given and the time period between reminders is increased.

Disaproval is never shown, only acceptance and praise on making a deposit in the potty. In a childs mind, they will seek praise and approval.

I don’t remember ever having an issue with stress or urge incontinence prior to childbirth but I think 2 lifelong conditions (both interrelated) have caused my incontinence.

Firstly, part of my autisism diagnosis is that I have alexithymia which supports what you have said as I have never voided based on internal signals but rather habit of timing (including going to the loo when I am near one to avoid the need to use when when not near one). This is an interesting aspect of being 24/7 as I have realised that I have almost from the get-go of being in nappies being unaware of when I am about to pee(!)

Secondly, my lack of ability to respond to internal signals has lead to a lifelong issue with constipation/bowel urgency. This has caused me to obsess about when to go (again based on a time frame and convenience rather than need) and to push/bear down on my pelvic floor which IMO has weakened my bladder continence. 

So all of my toileting has always been very habitual rather than based on need. It has always been a very stressful and limiting part of my life and is absolutely the reason why I feel so calm and secure being in nappies!

[babykeiff]

1 hour ago, Little Belle said:

I don’t remember ever having an issue with stress or urge incontinence prior to childbirth but I think 2 lifelong conditions (both interrelated) have caused my incontinence.

Firstly, part of my autisism diagnosis is that I have alexithymia which supports what you have said as I have never voided based on internal signals but rather habit of timing (including going to the loo when I am near one to avoid the need to use when when not near one). This is an interesting aspect of being 24/7 as I have realised that I have almost from the get-go of being in nappies being unaware of when I am about to pee(!)

Secondly, my lack of ability to respond to internal signals has lead to a lifelong issue with constipation/bowel urgency. This has caused me to obsess about when to go (again based on a time frame and convenience rather than need) and to push/bear down on my pelvic floor which IMO has weakened my bladder continence. 

So all of my toileting has always been very habitual rather than based on need. It has always been a very stressful and limiting part of my life and is absolutely the reason why I feel so calm and secure being in nappies!

@Little Belle, it is not stress and/or urge incontinence I am referring to. It is actually a lack of, or a failure to complete toilet training - and the tricks employed to ensure one stays dry. These are voiding every fixed time period, and inbetween when / where one is passing a bathroom. The behaviour is one is never far from bathroom and reduces ones intake of fluids to ensure that they can last between the times that they are at a bathroom. If one keep a diary recording the time they voided, the average time between voidings would be 60-120 minutes. Where the person knows that they will be in a situation where they can't reach a bathroom in that 60=120 minutes, they will intentionally (but subcontiously) reduce their fluid intake and/or increase their sweating to ensure that their bladder does not fill to voiding levels. Also, arginine vasopressin is synthasised to reduce the water content in the kidneys thus increasing duration between voiding. All this does is cause problems within the body with water retention and sodium balances which can adversly affect ones ability to rationally think plus plus.

You stated that you have 'alexithymia'  which is the definition for an inability to feel emotion. This was a Freudian theory, and modern research into this suggest it is more related to an overload of emotions rather than inablity to feel emotion. Considering that your water balance was mostly off due to your prior training, reduced hydration is a common reason for dinimished higher functioning in ones brain - which would lead to confusion when dealing with emotions as the brain would supress these functions in order to ensure self preservation.

The reason that you feel so calm in diapers/nappies is that you no longer have to play with your water balance to ensure you stay clean and dry. You have reverted back to the same logical and rational behaviour you had before you were toilet trained, and allow your body to control its own balance. This should not only calm you, but give you great self confidence while also reducing your stress levels. You should also see that you will behave smarter and more in control.

Do not worry about what the NHS will state. It will take time for them to realise you are a lot calmer and happier in your life in diapers than you were before - so chosing to wear / use diapers is what, in my opinion, is needed for your present and future health and welfare. The NHS will probably run a few tests before they are convinced.

[babyzoey]

So I never had issues prior to child birth ... I am petite and the lord said I shall have big kids. I picked a tall husband sooo this should have been a a sign maybe not the best plan one child was 9lbs the other was a strong 10 even !!! And 22 inch long I gave birth to a toddler!!! I had to send husband for 3 month clothing as newborn was really out of the question..

 

However I can't blame my kids but it's funny honestly to answer the question of how to sneeze and pee it was a funny retort it's kinds true. I will take some blame as I have been a member of the community since I was honestly a TB ... I Think one thing that makes that possible is wearing and learning to go in every position. I have talked to men though and it hasn't seen as rapid or as quick. So I can't and won't blame pregnancy. But I won't ignore it as a contributing factor either. 

 

Cool medical stuff though 

 

 

 

[babykeiff]

On 11/26/2022 at 12:41 AM, babyzoey said:

I had kids 

...just cause your kids are/were in diapers... does not mean Mommy copies them. - I know that they learn by copying you.... but wearing and using diapers - do you not think that is taking your role as Mommy a little to literal? ????????????????????