Outed to family so locked in? Potentially pursuing 24/7

[megaaaan]

Just wondering if anyone has ever been outed and in turn got socially locked into wearing diapers? Basically people are expecting you to be diapered, so what's weird is you not wearing diapers. I'm a DL and have been playing with the thought of going 24/7 with the aim of losing control for a while.

However I still live with parents so it's not like I can just get up and do it. One option I've considered is starting to wash my bedding multiple times a week (as if i've had an accident) - a few weeks ago I just naturally washed my bedding and my mum literally asked if I had an accident so I don't think it would be much of a shock.

My main worry is just what to say or how to do it - i'd rather be able to wear whenever i wanted and not have to try to keep it a secret or feel like i might be "caught". another concern is my brother, he's 12 and we are pretty close, i wouldn't want to make him think i'm weird etc

 

- i don't have the best control, granted i've not had a full on accident in a while (last time i remember was about 4-5 months ago or something like that. i must have had too much to drink at work and i was the only one there serving customers, people kept coming and i soaked a great majority of my underwear (not diapers) and leggings. had to text my mum and get her to bring me a change of clothes.
-- another instance of this was about 3-4 weeks ago, i was coming home from somewhere and walked home. i needed the toilet and slowly dribbed until i got home, not a full on accident but wasn't ideal. got in and threw my clothes in the washer

- i'm trans (mtf) so wearing diapers kind of means i don't have to tuck if that makes sense?

- i do get some sexual gratification from it but i'd say once i started wearing more often that'd likely become less and less

- and not sure if it's relevant but i wet the bed when i was like 8-11 or so

so yea, what do you think?

i'd rather just be able to wear and not worry about trying to hide it or being "caught".

if i wear lots and do lose control then i'll have to take it from there. as long as i'm not prone to spiralling then i should be okay, and if i am, i'll have to try to be on high alert of any signs of losing control
 

[Joep]

I think it would make more sense for you to wear when you want and if your parents noticed then try to explain casually. If you mention bladder problems then they’ll be confused when they notice you’re not wearing a diaper and then will realize you lied to them. If your intent is to go 24/7 then just start the program and see if they ever notice. You won’t need your parents consent assuming you have your own money to spend. 

[megaaaan]

22 minutes ago, Joep said:

I think it would make more sense for you to wear when you want and if your parents noticed then try to explain casually. If you mention bladder problems then they’ll be confused when they notice you’re not wearing a diaper and then will realize you lied to them. If your intent is to go 24/7 then just start the program and see if they ever notice. You won’t need your parents consent assuming you have your own money to spend. 

i mean i'm sure my mum knows i've got some sort of a "problem" - coming home and putting clothes in the washer, asking her to fetch a change of clothes. even her asking if i had an accident when i washed my bedding

so do you still think if she notices i'm wearing diapers, it'd be weird for me to not wear? like, i've not worn a diaper for a long while so idk

and yea it'd be my own money of course if they were to ask what sort of things do you think i should mention for it to be mostly accepted 

[Joep]

57 minutes ago, megaaaan said:

i mean i'm sure my mum knows i've got some sort of a "problem" - coming home and putting clothes in the washer, asking her to fetch a change of clothes. even her asking if i had an accident when i washed my bedding

so do you still think if she notices i'm wearing diapers, it'd be weird for me to not wear? like, i've not worn a diaper for a long while so idk

and yea it'd be my own money of course if they were to ask what sort of things do you think i should mention for it to be mostly accepted 

Of course it would be great if they accepted it but I would address it to them just to be honest. I’m sure your parents love you very much but they may not accept everything you do. If you tell them with the goal of simply being honest then maybe you won’t feel as put down if they don’t understand it or react negatively. You don’t have to justify wearing diapers to them. All you would have to say is that you feel more like yourself when you wear them, it makes you happy and it coincidentally helps with your bladder problems. 

[Enthusi]

Okay a few things are coming to mind, none of which you’re gonna like.  But I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention it. 
 

1. I would strongly advise against faking incontinence or accidents in order to get permission to wear diapers.  Most parents would insist their kid get a medical evaluation and a competent urologist would quickly determine you’re faking it.  Then you will have even more explaining to do. 
 

2.  Even if you do have some incontinence it’s very mild and common sense would dictate that you try lifestyle interventions or meds before jumping to diapers.

3.  I assume you are on the younger side seeing as you live with your parents and rely on them for support.  I’m telling you from experience that the 24/7 lifestyle is insanely difficult to pull off at a young age.  It’s crazy expensive, it complicates travel and day trips, and limits your dating options, and there are other people in your life to consider besides your parents.  When you’re 24/7 you have to take a diaper bag with you EVERYWHERE. You can’t just crash at someone’s house.  And, despite your best efforts, leaks will happen and you always need to be prepared for that.   I don’t want to deter you, but I’m encouraging you to think realistically about what your life is going to be like if you really were diapered 24/7 for the long run.

4. If you’ve given it a lot of thought and you still want to proceed with 24/7 then you are either going to need to have a mature albeit awkward conversation with your parent(s), or continuing to hide your usage and have a plan for when you are eventually caught.   
 

[Spicey Lettuce]

I think you should leave your family out of this.  If you need private space, secure income and your own residence.  Get out of Mom and Dads house.

If you need validation and someone to participate with you, get a boyfriend.

[megaaaan]

11 hours ago, Enthusi said:

Okay a few things are coming to mind, none of which you’re gonna like.  But I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention it. 
 

1. I would strongly advise against faking incontinence or accidents in order to get permission to wear diapers.  Most parents would insist their kid get a medical evaluation and a competent urologist would quickly determine you’re faking it.  Then you will have even more explaining to do. 
 

2.  Even if you do have some incontinence it’s very mild and common sense would dictate that you try lifestyle interventions or meds before jumping to diapers.

3.  I assume you are on the younger side seeing as you live with your parents and rely on them for support.  I’m telling you from experience that the 24/7 lifestyle is insanely difficult to pull off at a young age.  It’s crazy expensive, it complicates travel and day trips, and limits your dating options, and there are other people in your life to consider besides your parents.  When you’re 24/7 you have to take a diaper bag with you EVERYWHERE. You can’t just crash at someone’s house.  And, despite your best efforts, leaks will happen and you always need to be prepared for that.   I don’t want to deter you, but I’m encouraging you to think realistically about what your life is going to be like if you really were diapered 24/7 for the long run.

4. If you’ve given it a lot of thought and you still want to proceed with 24/7 then you are either going to need to have a mature albeit awkward conversation with your parent(s), or continuing to hide your usage and have a plan for when you are eventually caught.   
 

what's the average weekly/monthly cost of going 24/7? i'm 21 and buy all my own things, never ask my parents to buy me anything 

being 24/7 for the long run may not be for me but idk without wearing and i don't feel like moving out just to wear and not worry about anything. living at home is cheaper and i have no other reason to move out right now 

[Little Sherri]

2 hours ago, megaaaan said:

what's the average weekly/monthly cost of going 24/7

This is an interesting topic. Other than with my wife, I haven't "come out" to anyone about wearing diapers 24/7, although I have resolved to not hide it under medical circumstances, though, mercifully, I'm not in excessively frequent contact with the medical community these days. But if I ever get "found out" or have to come out to my extended family or friends, I would be leaning into a medical explanation for wearing diapers, for sure. So, if I ever decided to reverse course - which is not something I foresee, although I guess it's worth playing out as a thought experiment - then, I guess I would have to say that I found some kind of cure. Which would then lock me out of wearing 24/7, unless I want to go further down the deception rabbit hole, and say that "the medication stopped working", or whatever - all of which seems like way too much drama. I think right now my plan is not to draw attention to my underwear, which, I think, is generally a good policy under most circumstances. 

As for the cost, that really depends (Depends?) on where you live and what your preferences are. I have compared notes with some people in the UK, the US and Australia, and, being in Canada myself, I find that my costs are pretty close to that of Australia, with the US being less expensive and the UK more so, although more people in the UK seem to be able to get their products through insurance. I pay for all of mine out of pocket. 

I started out wearing crappy medical diapers that I could get at supermarkets and drug stores, and the typical cost of those is about $1 per diaper, but - and this is critical to the overall calculations - diapers like that are only good for a few hours generally. If you're at home and can push one to the edge of failure, then maybe a bit longer, but if you're heading out of the house, you might only be able to rely on two or three hours between changes. Putting a kid-sized diaper inside as a stuffer can significantly increase your range, but that also adds to the cost, and can create unpredictable performance issues. 

Eventually, I evolved to wearing pretty much only "real" ABDL diapers and premium medical ones - products made by companies like Rearz and Northshore. Those diapers generally cost around $3 each, although Rearz has really good sale prices from time to time, and I've stocked up when they do, which pushes my per-diaper cost down to about $2 per unit. I can typically get through a day wearing just two or three of those, and they are way more comfortable, satisfying, and reliable than store diapers that were seemingly designed for people with only a few hours left to live. 

If I were to say that my average use was 5 diapers in 48 hours, or about 2.5 per day, at an average price of $2.50 CAD per diaper, then my operating cost for wearing diapers 24/7 would work out to about $190 a month, which, I think, is pretty close to accurate. Plus diaper cream and baby powder - call it $195. 

[megaaaan]

2 hours ago, Little Sherri said:

This is an interesting topic. Other than with my wife, I haven't "come out" to anyone about wearing diapers 24/7, although I have resolved to not hide it under medical circumstances, though, mercifully, I'm not in excessively frequent contact with the medical community these days. But if I ever get "found out" or have to come out to my extended family or friends, I would be leaning into a medical explanation for wearing diapers, for sure. So, if I ever decided to reverse course - which is not something I foresee, although I guess it's worth playing out as a thought experiment - then, I guess I would have to say that I found some kind of cure. Which would then lock me out of wearing 24/7, unless I want to go further down the deception rabbit hole, and say that "the medication stopped working", or whatever - all of which seems like way too much drama. I think right now my plan is not to draw attention to my underwear, which, I think, is generally a good policy under most circumstances. 

As for the cost, that really depends (Depends?) on where you live and what your preferences are. I have compared notes with some people in the UK, the US and Australia, and, being in Canada myself, I find that my costs are pretty close to that of Australia, with the US being less expensive and the UK more so, although more people in the UK seem to be able to get their products through insurance. I pay for all of mine out of pocket. 

I started out wearing crappy medical diapers that I could get at supermarkets and drug stores, and the typical cost of those is about $1 per diaper, but - and this is critical to the overall calculations - diapers like that are only good for a few hours generally. If you're at home and can push one to the edge of failure, then maybe a bit longer, but if you're heading out of the house, you might only be able to rely on two or three hours between changes. Putting a kid-sized diaper inside as a stuffer can significantly increase your range, but that also adds to the cost, and can create unpredictable performance issues. 

Eventually, I evolved to wearing pretty much only "real" ABDL diapers and premium medical ones - products made by companies like Rearz and Northshore. Those diapers generally cost around $3 each, although Rearz has really good sale prices from time to time, and I've stocked up when they do, which pushes my per-diaper cost down to about $2 per unit. I can typically get through a day wearing just two or three of those, and they are way more comfortable, satisfying, and reliable than store diapers that were seemingly designed for people with only a few hours left to live. 

If I were to say that my average use was 5 diapers in 48 hours, or about 2.5 per day, at an average price of $2.50 CAD per diaper, then my operating cost for wearing diapers 24/7 would work out to about $190 a month, which, I think, is pretty close to accurate. Plus diaper cream and baby powder - call it $195. 

ah i'm not sure about getting it covered by insurance (i'm from the uk - and i likely wouldn't unless i actually became IC) but yea i'd be paying out of pocket too

i'd just like to be able to wear and not have to worry about hiding things to an extreme extent or being "caught" i guess

i'm trans and my parents have slowly accepted that, i even recall my dad joking about wearing diapers to have an even bulge (not sure if he'd remember if i brought that up) - not sure if he/they knew about my thing for diapers back then. would make sense for him to just say that if they did

i feel like i could benefit from wearing during the day, maybe not 24/7 but just out and about. no more texting mum to bring a change of clothes (surely she had realized what happened?) 

my only worry is hiding it / being "caught" by my parents which is why i want to "come out" - people have said that i should wait until i move out, which i understand, but living at home is cheaper and i have no real reason to get my own place atm 

[Enthusi]

I would ballpark about $200 USD a month on diapers. It’s possible to do it for much cheaper if you use generic diapers. But I wouldn’t recommend that if you can afford more. 

[megaaaan]

25 minutes ago, Enthusi said:

I would ballpark about $200 USD a month on diapers. It’s possible to do it for much cheaper if you use generic diapers. But I wouldn’t recommend that if you can afford more. 

that's not too bad to be fair, maybe be over generous with it and say $230-50. including supplies like cream, powder, wipes etc 

[sparklezBear]

It is hard for anyone to predict how your parents might react to the news that you wish to manage accidents with nappies. Typical reactions may involve concern and perhaps a demand medical investigation, or perhaps even dismissal and denial. Obviously your parents are going to want the best for you. I don't know what to suggest other than perhaps allowing more accidents to happen as a demonstration of the problem you're trying to resolve. 

In terms of costs, you may also expect to spend a little up front too. Some purchases might be:

* onesies / bodysuits to hold nappies in place

* plastic pants (maybe lined) for leaks

* diaper pail 

[megaaaan]

17 minutes ago, sparklezBear said:

It is hard for anyone to predict how your parents might react to the news that you wish to manage accidents with nappies. Typical reactions may involve concern and perhaps a demand medical investigation, or perhaps even dismissal and denial. Obviously your parents are going to want the best for you. I don't know what to suggest other than perhaps allowing more accidents to happen as a demonstration of the problem you're trying to resolve. 

In terms of costs, you may also expect to spend a little up front too. Some purchases might be:

* onesies / bodysuits to hold nappies in place

* plastic pants (maybe lined) for leaks

* diaper pail 

yea i know it's hard to forsee a reaction; even for me i've got no idea how she'll react. i mean, she's got to have realised i've got some issues. 1: texting for a change of clothes at work 2: coming home and putting my clothes i were wearing in the washer 3: literally asking me if i had an accident when i went to wash my sheets 

plus a long while ago my dad jokingly brought up diapers in relation to tucking (trans mtf) and said it would give an even bulge / padding. not sure if he'd remember that if i brought it up but yea

depending on what i say will yield different expectations too, if i say i've been wetting the bed and use diapers for night time protection i'd be expected to wear every single night etc

and yea the up front cost stuff makes sense. my only worry is that i've got a younger brother (12) and we're pretty close but i don't want him to think any of this is weird or lose our relationship 

[sparklezBear]

16 minutes ago, megaaaan said:

my only worry is that i've got a younger brother (12) and we're pretty close but i don't want him to think any of this is weird or lose our relationship

It's likely that your brother will find it wierd. However, kids are also likely to reach understanding much quicker than adults, and they will look to the reactions of others as role models for behavior. Hopefully this will translate to looking at your patents who sound very reasonable from what you've said.

How did your brother handle having a new sister rather than a brother? 

[megaaaan]

12 minutes ago, sparklezBear said:

It's likely that your brother will find it wierd. However, kids are also likely to reach understanding much quicker than adults, and they will look to the reactions of others as role models for behavior. Hopefully this will translate to looking at your patents who sound very reasonable from what you've said.

How did your brother handle having a new sister rather than a brother? 

i mean in terms of me being trans he's very accepting and supportive, when he talks to his friend i'm always sister, she/her etc. my mum has even said that he's called me megan before, which even my parents struggle with and i usually get called meg etc 

it may be weird for him but idk ? 

[BaronBrook]

You have a valid reason to be wearing diapers on occasion. Might as well tell your mom you're going to try protection now & then.

You can experiment a bit and be fully honest, especially if you're paying for your own diapers.