All My Mother's Rules (Ch. 70 & Epilogue - 2/13/24)

[JustaFoxGirl]

4 hours ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

I did think about that the authority situations as well as I was writing out Sarah's interactions with CPS and the nurse and doctor. The mindset of generally following rules and doing what she is told, especially while in a partially regressed state, does show how that comes back to bite the Mom, but I also meant it to show how she has lost some of her independence as well, just going along with things (even if they are good for her) without questioning them.

Yea, absolutely. I just love how despite the abuse, there was still something there that ends up saving Sarah. Even if she doesn't understand it right now.

[spark]

6 hours ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

I guess I didn't think of specifying between a pediatric urologist and an regular one. I would assume it is a regular one, and that it wouldn't be too much of an issue for that, especially given Sarah is much closer in age to being a legal adult than a toddler.

I think they would consult with a pediatric urologist.  I know that my SIL treats teenagers, as well as infants.   I'm sure this was a screening, and they brought Jane when they realized that Sarah couldn't control her bladder. 

There are a lot of issues that they need to investigate.  I don't think an exclusive diet of baby food would be enough nourishment for a teenager.   She lost weight and is taller, and I believe her BMI was already small.   It's a big reason she fell.  She was too big for the crib and spent two months in the crib, which must have caused orthopedic issues, especially because she was forced to crawl.   Not to mention the mental health implications of being in virtual solitary confinement for two months.

6 hours ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

One thing to keep in mind about academics is the Mom was "homeschooling" Sarah for this semester. I think it is safe to say that she filed proper paperwork, otherwise it would have been a truancy officers checking in much earlier than two months down the road.

I'm assuming that Sarah didn't do any school.  As a baby, all she did was eat, sleep, pee and poo.   A school wouldn't give her credit for any classwork that she did. 

Depending on the size of the high school, they wouldn't have the resources to bring in truancy offices.  The sad fact is that we don't on high school students, most of whom are school refusal.   They will pressure parents in middle school, but we have a lot of students who won't go to school.  The county won't do anything about it if the child is 15, however, nobody seeing Sarah would raise a red flag. 

Three months is too much of a semester to earn full credit for the semester.    That's the difference between high school and K-8.  In K-8, you can ignore half the course because credits don't matter.  You have to earn credits in  HS.   

[JustaFoxGirl]

4 minutes ago, spark said:

I'm assuming that Sarah didn't do any school.  As a baby, all she did was eat, sleep, pee and poo.   A school wouldn't give her credit for any classwork that she did. 

Do you think it's possible her mother was doing the schoolwork? I'm sure if she was filing paperwork, she would have to show the work was being done, but it obviously wasn't being done by Sarah, and like MW said, people would have come looking a lot sooner if they thought anything was wrong.

[spark]

1 minute ago, JustaFoxGirl said:

Do you think it's possible her mother was doing the schoolwork? I'm sure if she was filing paperwork, she would have to show the work was being done, but it obviously wasn't being done by Sarah, and like MW said, people would have come looking a lot sooner if they thought anything was wrong.

It is entirely possible, and it would be an excellent way for Mom to keep the school from investigating.  Depending on the way the Home school works, there may be some requirements for showing up in front of somebody (at least online) from an attendance standpoint- they just want work samples.

[MinnesotaWriter]

I think there is a bit of a lack of understanding about how homeschooling works and how completely unregulated it is. As I was homeschooled for a few years (which, I should say, I did have as good of an experience with it as was possible, given that it is a less-than-ideal educational format), it is something I'm quite familiar with.

If Sarah's mom unenrolled Sarah from school and filed whatever notice is required by the state (which, while I haven't confirmed that as happening in the story, it's basically the case because a two-month-long, unexplained absence from school is going to get investigated in my opinion, especially since Sarah is an exceptional student without a record of missing school), then there is basically no oversight over what the mom is doing with Sarah, at least as far as the school is concerned.

The mom isn't filing any additional information or lesson plans or anything with the school. As far as the school is going to be concerned, Sarah is no longer their student at that point, same as if Sarah had been moved to a private school or another school district.

For reference, I pulled up the actual rules for New Mexico (I didn't look at these while writing the story, I wrote just based on my experiences with homeschooling while growing up, but you can see how absolutely lax they are): How to Comply with New Mexico’s Homeschool Law (hslda.org)

I'm not suggesting Sarah is getting any credit for work that would be missed, and I understand how missing that time makes it basically impossible to get credits for that semester, but there are options to make up classes, such as in the summer, that could allow her to catch up and graduate on schedule, even if that will make it more difficult.

---

Anyway, the point isn't to keep bashing on homeschooling, it just happens to be a useful and realistic plot device to explain how the mom was able to keep Sarah locked up at home without any potential interference from the school, but that is a scenario that can and does happen in real life cases with parents attempting to cover up abuse.

[JustaFoxGirl]

12 minutes ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

I think there is a bit of a lack of understanding about how homeschooling works and how completely unregulated it is. As I was homeschooled for a few years (which, I should say, I did have as good of an experience with it as was possible, given that it is a less-than-ideal educational format), it is something I'm quite familiar with.

If Sarah's mom unenrolled Sarah from school and filed whatever notice is required by the state (which, while I haven't confirmed that as happening in the story, it's basically the case because a two-month-long, unexplained absence from school is going to get investigated in my opinion, especially since Sarah is an exceptional student without a record of missing school), then there is basically no oversight over what the mom is doing with Sarah, at least as far as the school is concerned.

The mom isn't filing any additional information or lesson plans or anything with the school. As far as the school is going to be concerned, Sarah is no longer their student at that point, same as if Sarah had been moved to a private school or another school district.

For reference, I pulled up the actual rules for New Mexico (I didn't look at these while writing the story, I wrote just based on my experiences with homeschooling while growing up, but you can see how absolutely lax they are): How to Comply with New Mexico’s Homeschool Law (hslda.org)

I'm not suggesting Sarah is getting any credit for work that would be missed, and I understand how missing that time makes it basically impossible to get credits for that semester, but there are options to make up classes, such as in the summer, that could allow her to catch up and graduate on schedule, even if that will make it more difficult.

---

Anyway, the point isn't to keep bashing on homeschooling, it just happens to be a useful and realistic plot device to explain how the mom was able to keep Sarah locked up at home without any potential interference from the school, but that is a scenario that can and does happen in real life cases with parents attempting to cover up abuse.

I had no idea that homeschooling was so poorly regulated, that's awful even outside the context of the story. I did understand it being used as a plot device, but you've probably noticed I have a terrible habit of overthinking lol.

[spark]

34 minutes ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

I'm not suggesting Sarah is getting any credit for work that would be missed, and I understand how missing that time makes it basically impossible to get credits for that semester, but there are options to make up classes, such as in the summer, that could allow her to catch up and graduate on schedule, even if that will make it more difficult.

In real life, Sarah would have no issues making up the classes, but there doesn't need to be a rush to get her back in school.   She could start in June at summer school, and then be fully back by fall.  We can get very creative when we need to get kids credits.   She could easily graduate with her class, and with honors.  She is on her own for college, which will suck.

I have no idea how they would handle her guardianship.   I would hope that she would go to a nurturing foster situation, but sadly that's not always the case.   However, I would ask for her school to assess Sarah.

 

[BabySofia]

16 minutes ago, spark said:

She is on her own for college, which will suck.

Well, I will say there are some decent scholarships for kids like this out there. If she has someone who can guide her for applications that wouldn't be the end of the world. The question post-high school is how much obligation does she feel towards her baby sister? She's only a few years from being able to be an adult and legally adopt her sister potentially and raise her herself.

I'm curious to see what happens with her too. 

Poor kids!

[spark]

3 hours ago, BabySofia said:

Well, I will say there are some decent scholarships for kids like this out there. If she has someone who can guide her for applications that wouldn't be the end of the world. The question post-high school is how much obligation does she feel towards her baby sister? She's only a few years from being able to be an adult and legally adopt her sister potentially and raise her herself.

I'm curious to see what happens with her too. 

Poor kids!

That's a big question for me as well.   I wonder how Sarah will feel Emilia as she processes what happened.   That diapers=baby mentality is deeply ingrained in both of them, and Emilia seemed to relish the idea of being the big sister.   

However, Sarah is so perceptive that I think she will understand that Emilia was just a pawn, just as she was when Emilia was struggling with potty training.

PS- I just re-read up to chapter 10, and Mom is a bitch.   She was a terrible mother who gaslit Sarah at every opportunity.   Sarah has been under her thumb for 15 years.

[spark]

I reread the examination, and it is so realistic.

Jane is peeling the onion with this patient who was found an hour before in a crib with a soiled diaper, and gets her in a realistic way to open up and share the horrific abuse she suffered, along with likely cause for her incontinence.  Add in a bit of comfort that a doctor could need Pull-ups.  Amazing!

I don't want to turn this into an anti-foster system discussion, but the reality Sucks.   I hope MW doesn't go for a full reality of what Sarah may face when she becomes a foster child.  I hope she doesn't suffer the fate that the Turpin children went through.  

[zzzz50]

10 hours ago, spark said:

I reread the examination, and it is so realistic.

Jane is peeling the onion with this patient who was found an hour before in a crib with a soiled diaper, and gets her in a realistic way to open up and share the horrific abuse she suffered, along with likely cause for her incontinence.  Add in a bit of comfort that a doctor could need Pull-ups.  Amazing!

I don't want to turn this into an anti-foster system discussion, but the reality Sucks.   I hope MW doesn't go for a full reality of what Sarah may face when she becomes a foster child.  I hope she doesn't suffer the fate that the Turpin children went through.  

If I am remembering correctly didn’t Lisa’s Aunt & Uncle essentially foster her? Since they have experience with a child with incontinence they would seem to be a good fit. The only issue would be if they would also be willing to take in the 3 yr old in order not to split up the family. That would be a big ask.

[JustaFoxGirl]

On 1/24/2024 at 10:11 PM, spark said:

PS- I just re-read up to chapter 10, and Mom is a bitch.   She was a terrible mother who gaslit Sarah at every opportunity.   Sarah has been under her thumb for 15 years.

I wonder, her mother mentioned she was put in diapers for bedwetting when she was younger. Do you think her parents also babied her as a punishment? It wouldn't surprise me if it's abuse that got passed down.

[Lost Little Neppy]

5 hours ago, JustaFoxGirl said:

I wonder, her mother mentioned she was put in diapers for bedwetting when she was younger. Do you think her parents also babied her as a punishment? It wouldn't surprise me if it's abuse that got passed down.

I'm thinking yes.

[spark]

9 hours ago, JustaFoxGirl said:

I wonder, her mother mentioned she was put in diapers for bedwetting when she was younger. Do you think her parents also babied her as a punishment? It wouldn't surprise me if it's abuse that got passed down.

That might be true, but I don't think we will get to learn about mom's motives in this story.  It's written from Sarah's perspective, and MW has done a great job making this story believable.   Short of including any testimony, I don't think Sarah will learn much about her mother's motives.

[JustaFoxGirl]

7 hours ago, spark said:

That might be true, but I don't think we will get to learn about mom's motives in this story.  It's written from Sarah's perspective, and MW has done a great job making this story believable.   Short of including any testimony, I don't think Sarah will learn much about her mother's motives.

I don't think so either, but it was just a random thought that popped into my head and I felt like sharing lol. Not all questions will be answered and that's perfectly fine.

[spark]

2 hours ago, JustaFoxGirl said:

I don't think so either, but it was just a random thought that popped into my head and I felt like sharing lol. Not all questions will be answered and that's perfectly fine.

This story would not work as well if it were in the third person.  There is something about being restricted to Sarah's perspective that works.  However,  I'm looking forward to the interrogation scene when @MinnesotaWriter writes the screenplay for the movie version.

[JustaFoxGirl]

1 hour ago, spark said:

This story would not work as well if it were in the third person.  There is something about being restricted to Sarah's perspective that works.  However,  I'm looking forward to the interrogation scene when @MinnesotaWriter writes the screenplay for the movie version.

I agree about the writing perspective. I just felt like sharing a thought I had lol.

[MinnesotaWriter]

Chapter 66: Rules and Punishments

I gritted my teeth, fingernails digging into my palms as I clenched my fists. I was staring off to the left as a nurse prepared to stick a needle in my right arm for a blood draw. My wandering eyes had finally focused on one of those promotional posters on the wall talking about the importance of donating blood.

I couldn’t bear to look. I had told the nurse just to stick the needle in when she was ready, without giving me any type of countdown or warning. Knowing it was coming was only going to further fray my already unraveling nerves.

Then the needle was in.

The pain of being stabbed with a needle was never as bad as the anticipation leading up to being jabbed, but that didn’t mean that my arm didn’t hurt, or that I wasn’t going to be really sore for a couple of days.

Amanda had her arm around my back. The social worker been my chaperone as I’d been passed between what felt like a half-dozen doctors and nurses as I went through a run of different tests.

The only good thing was I hadn’t been forced to even attempt to pee in a cup. I was able to turn in a pull-up that I’d wet while trying to sit still for a series of x-rays. I’d put it into an opaque bag with my patient ID on it and slid it through a discreet revolving receptacle.

I didn’t envy the person whose job it was to get the urine out of the pull-up for testing.

And then the needle was finally out. It hurt about as much being removed as it did being put in.

“You’ll want to stay in that chair to rest for another four or five minutes,” said the nurse, who had drawn my blood. “You’re not underweight, but you are smaller for your age, so the blood loss is probably going to hit you a bit harder.”

Staying seated was perfectly alright with me. I had no desire to get up, not with how my feet ached from all the walking back and forth that I had been forced to do. The hospital complex was massive, and it seemed like none of the tests that I had to do were located in places that were in close proximity to her.

“You did so good,” Amanda said, giving my left shoulder a squeeze. Amanda looked over at Julie. The nurse had accompanied us on the journey throughout the hospital. “That should be the last test for Sarah today, right?”

“Yep, and we’ve got the overnight room you requested set up for her.”

“Thanks for getting that taken care of,” Amanda said. “But police do need to ask Sarah some questions, and we’ve probably put that off too long. We’ll need to get that taken care of first.”

So, I wasn’t going home tonight. I didn’t know what I should feel about that. Everything that Jane had said to me was still sinking in. Her undisguised shock and disgust at my description of how Mom had been treating me was weighing on my mind. Had I not explained everything correctly to her, or was her response to an accurate description an indictment of my own inability to recognize that something was wrong?

But if I wasn’t going home? What was going to happen to me? I couldn’t live at the hospital forever.

Would I end up back home with Mom at some point? That didn’t seem to be an outcome that either any of the social workers, nurses, or doctors I’d seen so far would be happy with. Not from how they’d reacted every time I’d gone over my tale of what had been occurring at home.

And it wasn’t as though I had any relatives who could take me in. The prospect of foster care was also daunting, as having to let even more people become aware of my condition wasn’t something I wanted to do.

But that wasn’t the question I was struggling with. What was it that I wanted? I had made a decision on New Year’s Eve that I had wanted diapers and had just accepted that with that desire came the need to be treated like a baby by Mom.

Everyone was now telling me that this had been wrong. But for them to be correct, that would mean that Mom was wrong. But not only wrong, she had done something intentionally bad to me. But not something that was bad in the sense it was something I didn’t enjoy, like being disciplined for bad grades, but bad in the sense that nothing I could have done, no matter how disobedient, could make me deserve what she had done to me.

It was just too much for me to deal with at the moment.

I finally worked up the courage to look at where I had been so rudely stabbed with a needle. A plain band aid covered up the entry-wound but couldn’t obscure the additional bruising around that area of my arm.

The walk over to where we were going to talk to the police wasn’t shorter than any of the distances that I’d already been forced to walk between appointments already. I hadn’t had much sense of direction earlier when we’d arrived, but certain sights were beginning to look familiar. It seemed as though we were heading in the direction where Amanda had first brought me into the hospital.

We stopped outside a nondescript close door, and Amanda turned to talk to me.

“Everything is going to be all right. You just need to tell them the same things that you told Jane.”

She opened the door and ushered me in.

Two men in police uniforms were sitting on one side of a circular wooden table, along with Jodie, who was standing in the corner. There were still two plastic chairs at the table. Amanda pulled one out for me to take a seat in and then sat down next to me herself.

One of the police officers had a notepad set out in front of him with a pen, while the other, with a large mustache, was looking between me and Amanda.

“You’ve kept us waiting a while,” said the officer with the notebook.

“I’m sorry, but it was important to get a medical checkup completed first.”

“And?”

“The initial call-in to CPS said that there had been repeated beatings and that the girl was being denied food and starving,” Amanda said. “But, except for one possible thing that wasn’t mentioned in the report, everything looks good medically.”

“So that anonymous call was a hoax?” Asked the officer with the mustache.

“I don’t know.” Jodie chimed in from the corner. “As you saw from our initial report, there was separate abuse occurring. And despite the fact that the mother filed paperwork indicating that she was going to be homeschooling Sarah, there isn’t any evidence of any schooling having taken place in the last two months as well.”

“And what does the mother have to say for herself, anyway?” Amanda asked.

“Well, that’s why we were really needing to speak with Sarah as soon as possible,” said the officer with the notebook.

“What do you mean?” Amanda asked.

“Look, just let me talk to Sarah,” He said, and then he turned to face me. “We don’t know where your mom or your sister are, and we were hoping you might be able to help us figure that out.”

“They missing?”

“Your mom left her work shortly after CPS arrived at your house. She then picked up your sister early from preschool, and they haven’t been seen since.”

I knew right away what must have happened. I had never thought for a second that Mom wasn’t watching the baby camera that she had set up in the bedroom. She would have realized that something was off fairly quickly.

“So, she was paying attention to the baby monitor, you think?” Amanda asked, saying what was already on my mind.

“That’s the theory.” The officer said. He turned back to look at me. “Would you know, perhaps, if there is anywhere your mom might be going to? Relatives. Close friend. Vacation cabin. Anything?”

I shook my head. “Don’t know.” None of that applied to our little family.

“It’s OK. I figured it was worth a try, but this next question is more important, Sarah. Was your mom mistreating Emilia in any way? Hurting her at all?”

Mom, do anything bad to Emilia? Of course not. I shook my head.

“So, your mom didn’t punish Emilia for things like she did for you?”

“Not really. Not most of the time.” I added, as if it might explain things: “But Emilia behaved.”

The questions continued. They focused first on the fact that I hadn’t been in school at all the past two months, asking questions about what, if anything, Mom had been doing to homeschool me. Mom, of course, hadn’t been doing anything in that regard. There were questions about injuries, spankings, times Mom had hit or hurt me in other ways. Questions about how much food I was getting to eat and how often. While the questions focused mostly on me, they did often ask things that also were about my little sister as well.

The issue of diapers hadn’t come up yet. They had to know. Amanda’s reference to giving them an initial report would have had to have included what they found when they entered the home. Were they as uncomfortable with the subject as I was? Or did they just not find it as important?

I was midway through answering a question about the baby monitor and if I knew how often Mom was watching me on it, when something rumbled in my stomach. It wasn’t because I was hungry. But it was because of what I had eaten earlier today.

I recognized what was happening. I stood up suddenly, with the futile hope of making it to the toilet in time, but it was too late to do anything about it.

I messed the pull-up. It wasn’t one of those messes that was more easily contained, something solid. No, it was the kind of accident one has when they eat out and have something go through their system that their body doesn’t quite agree with.

And it didn’t come out silently, either. The sound was amplified in the small room. The accident cut me off in the middle of the sentence, bringing everything to a pause.

I wanted to blame the fast-food meal I had been fed on the way to the hospital. I hadn’t eaten anything fried or greasy in a long time, and it was clear from the stench that my digestive system had been none too happy with the sudden change in diet.

I had never messed myself in a pull-up before. That had always happened in a diaper. Now I understood why that had been necessary.

These pull-ups were made for older kids who still wet the bed. I doubted that nighttime bed messing could be a thing, so there wouldn’t be a need to design a pull-up in a way that it would need to contain that.

The pull-up had failed miserably at its task of containing the accident, but even if the mess had all stayed in the pull-up, the smell alone would have been a terrible problem.

I stood up, there was a brownish liquid running slowly down both of my legs, I began to pee. That was an even worse problem. There wasn’t any room left in the pull-up to absorb any of the urine, so it leaked out both sides of the pull-up, running down onto the floor in two separate streams. Tears dripped off my face, adding slightly to the puddles on the floor.

“What the hell?” the younger officer asked, his hand over his nose. It didn’t sound so much like he was upset at my accident as just completely dumbfounded that it could have happened.

“That,” Amanda said, pausing while she appeared to be searching for the right words to say. “Is the medical issue that we’ve had doctors looking at for the past hour.”

“So, she isn’t toilet trained?” the officer asked.

“First, the medical term is incontinence. And secondly, she was, at least up until midway through this school year. We think the abuse started in response to her medical issues, and the abuse only appears to have worsened the issue.”

“Christ,” the officer with the mustache muttered. “That’s really screwed up.”

---

For the second time today, Amanda and Jodie were wiping shit off of my bottom.

This time, though, it was an even worse accident, the clean-up made even more challenging by the fact that there wasn’t a shower they could have me stand in afterward to make sure everything was completely cleaned off of me.

Once the two social workers had figured out where the nearest restroom was, Amanda had wrapped my jacket around my waist, mostly obscuring the visual signs of my accident, though nothing could be done about the smell.

Thankfully, the nearest restroom was just around the corner, and we somehow managed to get there without needing to pass anyone in the hallway. Though I suspected there would be a lingering odor outside that would bother everyone passing through for a while.

The odor being confined the bathroom didn’t help at the moment, and tossing the dirty pull-up and wet wipes wasn’t doing much to improve things.

“Are you attached to this dress?” Jodie asked.

I shook a tear-drenched head. She proceeded to toss it into the garbage. That’s when you know a blowout was really bad, when clothing starts getting tossed.

The only spare clothes they had packed for me were a pair of leggings and a sweater. Amanda and Jodie did, however, appeared to have packed several more pull-ups.

I put the clean pull-up on all by myself, though I got some help with the leggings. These were not ones I would have picked. They were a little thin, and a tiny bit see through. The outline of the padding from the pull-up was visible through them.

I remembered how Jane had described her own bladder issues. Her admission that she still wore a pull-up. If she, an adult, could delineate between the decision to wear diapers and being treated like a baby, could I do I do the same?

Amanda gave me a hug, which was possible now that I was all cleaned up. “We’ll get another doctor for you to see tomorrow to check with these accidents.”

These accidents. I knew she was referring to the fact that I had messed myself twice today. I hoped whatever tests they wanted to run for that tomorrow didn’t require samples like I had been forced to give earlier today.

“I don’t think my tummy was happy with the Happy Meal.”

“You probably haven’t had any fast food for a long time?”

“Yeah.”

“There are some private, overnight rooms for kids staying at the hospital. That’s where we are headed next. A nurse will bring you dinner up there. Hopefully something your stomach will like better.”

My stomach grumbled at the mention of food, this time because I was actually hungry. Hopefully, whatever it was they fed me would sit better with my stomach. I was more hopeful about regaining control of my bowels rather than my bladder.

I had never truly had one of those accidents before outside of laxatives or being denied the chance to use the toilet, and that didn’t really count. Yes, I had adjusted to messing in a diaper the past two months, but I had still needed to make a conscious decision to do so when the urge came, compared to how my bladder was often emptying randomly with no warning.

---

The room Amanda led me to probably wasn’t meant for a teenager. The colorful designs and patterns matched something that might have been more aesthetically pleasing to an elementary-aged kid.

But the bed in the corner was exactly what I needed at the moment for my weary feet. The mattress was only a foot off the ground. I kicked my shoes off and flopped right down. It wasn’t a large bed, but anything would feel big in comparison to the cramped crib I had been sleeping it. I hadn’t realized how much my body had ached until I had the chance to lie down and fully extend myself, which I could do, as long as I was lying down at a slight angle on the bed.

There was a tiny bathroom off to the side, with an even tinier shower stall inside it. I wouldn’t have any excuses for not keeping my pull-up dry with my own private bathroom right there.

Amanda was seated at a desk in the corner, typing away on a laptop. I closed my eyes. The sound reminded me of something. Sitting at my own desk, fingers ablaze at the keyboard, in the middle of an intense video game. I suddenly wanted to play Fortnite so badly.

A clock on the wall said it was already 8 p.m. That made sense. It had already been fairly late in the afternoon when I had been picked up by CPS. And all the medical examinations and the interview with the police had taken quite a while.

A few minutes later, a nurse popped in with the promised dinner tray for me. Mac and cheese, some veggie slices and ranch dip, and a piece of toast. It was all gone a few minutes later. I hadn’t realized how hungry I was. I took the final bite of mac and cheese and rinsed it down with a sip of chocolate milk, and that was the end of it.

Amanda closed her laptop and got up from the desk. “There should be a fresh toothbrush and toothpaste in the bathroom, and soap and shampoo, so you can shower in the morning.”

“I have to go home tonight, but I’ll be back in the morning. If you need anything, you can buzz a nurse to come with this button.” Amana pointed to a button on the wall near the bed. “But there is also a nurse on duty overnight night at the desk down the hallway as well.”

That answered another question. The door didn’t have a lock on it. But I was sure that the nurse outside was there partially to make sure none of the patients left when they weren’t supposed to.

“There are some pajamas in the drawer that should fit you. Is there anything else you might need before I go?”

“Did you bring any diapers from home?” I was fairly certain I knew what the answer to that question was going to be, but I felt compelled to ask it anyway.

“No, you still have plenty of pull-ups. The rest of them are here in the backpack. If you run out, all you need to do is ask a nurse for some more.”

“But I need a diaper. Please.”

Amanda looked confused. I don’t think she understood how much difference there was in the amount of absorbency a pull-up provided compared to a diaper.

“You have a toilet all to yourself a few feet away. Why don’t we stick with having you wear a pull-up for now so you can get to the toilet easier?”

“But I never wore these pull-ups at night because I would always pee too much and they would leak all over the bed.”

Amanda pondered my response for a few seconds. “I see,” she said at least. “I’ll find a nurse to check with. There should be something they can bring for you. Why don’t you go potty one more time before bed and get your teeth brushed?

I had already used the toilet like twenty minutes ago, but I did so again before beginning to brush my teeth.

Amanda was back a few minutes. I poked my head out of the bathroom, toothbrush still in my mouth, to see that she was holding a diaper. I hadn’t doubted that a hospital would have diapers, but that was quicker than even I had anticipated.

Amanda reached out to hand the diaper to me, but I didn’t take it.

“Can you help?”

From the look on her face. I got the impression that this, along with a lot of what she had done to care for me today, wasn’t a typical part of her job description. Nevertheless, Amanda had me lie down on the bed.

I was a little proud of the fact that Amanda didn’t have to use any wipes to clean me up while changing me from the pull-up and into a diaper. The pull-up had stayed dry since that disastrous accident during the police interview.

I had only had two people put a diaper on me before, as a teenager at least. And both Mom and Lisa had done so in a way that suggested they knew what they were doing.

That wasn’t the case for Amanda. She stared blankly at the four tapes for a while. I began to suspect she didn’t have all that much experience with baby diapers, either.

In the end, we were able to figure it out together. It wasn’t as snug as I would have liked, nor as soft and comfortable as the diapers I had been put into before, but at least I wouldn’t have to wake up to a wet bed in the middle of the night.

Amanda offered to get me some pajamas from the smaller dresser next to the bed, but I declined. It was already fairly warm in the room, so I didn’t think it would be needed.

Amanda sat down on the bed next to me. She wrapped her arm around my shoulder, and I rested my head against her.

“What happens tomorrow?”

That question had been weighing on me the entire trip up to this room. I had always had a decent idea of what tomorrow might bring for me. Even if I dreaded it or didn’t know which of several bad options were likely to occur, I could at least form a mental picture before going to sleep of what the next day could possibly be like.

I was finding myself incapable of doing that for tomorrow. My life had been completely upended, and I didn’t have any ability to imagine what would come next before I could settle into whatever new normal awaited me.

“I’m not sure yet. I need to talk to the police and some other people at CPS.”

“Will I go back home with Mom?”

“You don’t have to worry about that.” Amanda said. “I don’t think you’re ever going to be going back to living with your mother. There’s already a warrant out for her arrest, and, with the other information you’ve provided to the police, that’s only going to make the potential charges against her more serious. She’s likely going to be spending a lot of time in jail once she is caught.”

I think that is when the reality of the situation really began to sink in for me. It was one thing for all the adults at the hospital to express indignation at my mother’s behavior, but being told that her actions would mean spending time in jail brought the severity of the situation to a level that I understood. I knew all about rules and punishments.

My thumb found its way into my mouth as Amanda pulled the covers over me. That’s how I had fallen asleep every night since I had begun sleeping in the crib. Amanda didn’t look like she approved, but some habits were hard to break.

[BabySofia]

8 minutes ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

I knew all about rules and punishments.

Live by the sword, die by the sword... Her mom deserves every day she gets in prison. I'm sure it won't be many as long as she behaves herself in jail. The fact that she ran might make it more as I doubt she'll get to go out on bail now. 

11 minutes ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

It wasn’t as snug as I would have liked, nor as soft and comfortable as the diapers I had been put into before, but at least I wouldn’t have to wake up to a wet bed in the middle of the night.

Hope that's the case, the not as snug part makes me worry!

 

9 minutes ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

but some habits were hard to break.

Unfortunately, she is going to have many of those!

Two months of hell, where poor Sarah was so beaten down she couldn't even understand it was wrong anymore. She really needs to, at some point, come clean and be honest about what happened with her sister, too. Hopefully the police do take their investigation seriously here.

And hopefully, the accidents are only due to the upset stomach as far as the bowels are concerned. Diarrhea happens to the best of us! I highly doubt she ever has reliable bladder control again. 

Looking forward to the conclusion of this tale. I'm going to have to re-read this and Diapers Never Lie again when you finish. 

[spark]

The cop was a bit of a prick.  I hope that they take the investigation and put an APB out for Mom and there already is an Amber Alert issued.    

She is doing great since she has only been out of the crib for about five hours.

22 minutes ago, BabySofia said:

Live by the sword, die by the sword... Her mom deserves every day she gets in prison. I'm sure it won't be many as long as she behaves herself in jail. The fact that she ran might make it more as I doubt she'll get to go out on bail now. 

The fact that Mom ran is a sign that Mom knew she was wrong.   If they know the license plate, she is in trouble.

We talked about Mom monitoring the nanny came, but they will send alerts to your phone is there is movement.  Depending on how far Mom was from their house, Sarah might not have been able to make it very far if she had tried to escape.  The sad part is that she got so brainwashed that she wasn't going to leave.

I don't think it's even worthwhile to encourage Sarah to use the toilet.  I think the key is to help her gain independence and get her past the mindset that she chose her fate.   I think she is getting there.

32 minutes ago, BabySofia said:

Looking forward to the conclusion of this tale. I'm going to have to re-read this and Diapers Never Lie again when you finish. 

I highly recommend reading Diapers Never Lie.  There is so much in that story that parallels what happened here, and Lisa could be a big part of Sarah's recovery.

[AdultInnocence]

59 minutes ago, MinnesotaWriter said:

Amanda closed her laptop and got her from the desk

Looks like there is something missing in this line

I have a feeling the diaper not as snug means the nurse is going to have a task in the middle of the night. Good chapter, thinks for delivering it to us.

[Nat]

The fact her mom fled means she knew what she was doing was wrong but didn't care, she was caught so she fled leaving her daughter behind. 

[Night Rain]

Where would the Mom have fled to or is currently in hiding. I'd find it really weird if perhaps the Mom was related to Lisa's Mom is some weird and twisted way even though. Nothing was ever mentioned or suggested at, at all.

[spark]

1 hour ago, Nat said:

The fact her mom fled means she knew what she was doing was wrong but didn't care, she was caught so she fled leaving her daughter behind. 

She did pick up Emilia.  She wasn't going to get Sarah.  Once they witnessed what they saw, and rescued Sarah, mom couldn't touch her.   I don't think they would use a lot of resources to find her if Emilia was safe.  But I think they would put out an Amber Alert to save Emilia.

1 hour ago, Night Rain said:

Where would the Mom have fled to or is currently in hiding. I'd find it really weird if perhaps the Mom was related to Lisa's Mom is some weird and twisted way even though. Nothing was ever mentioned or suggested at, at all.

I've thought about Lisa's mom and Sarah's mom being related, but it is a Breaking Bad-type coincidence, which doesn't seem to be @MinnesotaWriter style.

I don't know where Mom could go on the run, because it takes a lot of skill to run away from the law now.   They can ping your cell phone.  They can track your credit purchases.  She goes to a hotel, and they'll know where she is.  She can't go to her job, and can't go to her house. 

I'm not sure what the legal ramifications are for her running, but it destroys a defense that she could theoretically.   Legally, her best move once she noticed the activity on the nanny cam would be to call a defense lawyer and come clean with the lawyer.    

I keep thinking about what the CPS, LE, and medical personnel would be thinking as they help Sarah.   Amanda expected a physically restrained, malnourished child, and might have expected some kind of restraints.  In most cases that I've heard, if they are diapers- they aren't changed.     

Sarah appeared to be fed and cared for, which takes a lot of effort.  I'm sure Sarah's skin is in bad shape because she has to stay in messy diapers so long, but she was changed and bathed somewhat regularly.  She was fed, which takes a lot of effort.

I asked this last chapter, but what happens when somebody has an exclusive diet of baby food for two months?  I don't think it would be good for an adult.

 

[MinnesotaWriter]

4 hours ago, BabySofia said:

Live by the sword, die by the sword... Her mom deserves every day she gets in prison. I'm sure it won't be many as long as she behaves herself in jail. The fact that she ran might make it more as I doubt she'll get to go out on bail now. 

Running certainly doesn't help, but will depend on whether she continues running once she is aware that the police are looking for her.

4 hours ago, BabySofia said:

Unfortunately, she is going to have many of those!

Two months of hell, where poor Sarah was so beaten down she couldn't even understand it was wrong anymore. She really needs to, at some point, come clean and be honest about what happened with her sister, too. Hopefully the police do take their investigation seriously here.

And hopefully, the accidents are only due to the upset stomach as far as the bowels are concerned. Diarrhea happens to the best of us! I highly doubt she ever has reliable bladder control again. 

 

I think she has been accurate in answering what has gone on with her sister, even if she has been presenting it as this was bad compared to what happened to me. I would say the bowel accident is very much due to an abrupt change in diet, as Sarah was suspecting, though that doesn't mean that will resolve immediately, but even while being babied, she never really lost any control of going number 2.

4 hours ago, BabySofia said:

Looking forward to the conclusion of this tale. I'm going to have to re-read this and Diapers Never Lie again when you finish. 

Thanks! We're getting close. Some of these scenes, especially CPS arriving and the hospital, have just taking up a lot more chapters than I initially expected.

3 hours ago, AdultInnocence said:

Looks like there is something missing in this line

I have a feeling the diaper not as snug means the nurse is going to have a task in the middle of the night. Good chapter, thinks for delivering it to us.

Yep, just needed to change a word there.

As far as whether the nurse will need to change anything in the middle of the night, time will tell on that one.

2 hours ago, Nat said:

The fact her mom fled means she knew what she was doing was wrong but didn't care, she was caught so she fled leaving her daughter behind. 

Yep, she knows that what she is doing is wrong, but that could be seen earlier in how she was always very careful not to do anything that would be exposing how Sarah was being treated to others. There wasn't any public humiliation that might be seen in other stories from a parent babying their kid.

1 hour ago, Night Rain said:

Where would the Mom have fled to or is currently in hiding. I'd find it really weird if perhaps the Mom was related to Lisa's Mom is some weird and twisted way even though. Nothing was ever mentioned or suggested at, at all

14 minutes ago, spark said:

I've thought about Lisa's mom and Sarah's mom being related, but it is a Breaking Bad-type coincidence, which doesn't seem to be @MinnesotaWriter style.

When I was putting together that backstory for LIsa, I did have the thought of what if this was the Mom's backstory instead, which could have been an interesting insight into what could be driving her behavior, but ultimately I decided I wanted to use Diapers Never Lie to tell Lisa's story. There isn't any relation between LIsa's mom and Sarah's mom. 

14 minutes ago, spark said:

I asked this last chapter, but what happens when somebody has an exclusive diet of baby food for two months?  I don't think it would be good for an adult.

I think this chapter answers part of that. I don't think there is really a lot of research on that, but my best guess is it messes with your digestive system, so that switching back to a regular diet (and in this case, greasy fast food, could cause some bowel issues while re-adjusting)