'Adult Baby Life Dynamics' And 'Ab Parents' Seminars

[rosalie.bent]

pride parades are probably a safe place to do this as you are unlikely to even stand out! Even Disney Land is perhaps easier although I think with children around that is a bit dubious. but outside that, the general community is probably very unaccepting of a public AB. One of the discussion topics of the proposed Seminar is actually about designing what kind of public AB acceptance do you think is 'fair and reasonable'. It should prove interesting!

[rosalie.bent]

We have developed a short survey to ask people about this concept of a seminar/workshop on ABs

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/WLZRS6X

please go to it and help us learn what we need to know.

[BriGuy]

Well as you can see that picture was taken inside of a hooters bar in San Diego. I've also been out and about on flagstaff az, Sam Francisco, las Vegas, and long beach.

Never did I hear negative reviews. We had been interviewed a couple of times. Heidilynn lived full time in Phoenix as a sissy baby girl. Sure some of the public was shocked, but most didn't care and don't care.

I personally believe the largest ones who take issue with this lifestyle are the ones who are in it. Most of my experience with outsiders have been of curiosity and disinterest.

Then again I don't go running around with a soggy filled diaper showing and smelling to high heaven of potty yuck either.

So who knows, if someone takes great offense to me chances are they forget about the whole thing a couple of days later.

I have been on the receiving end of hecklers at pride parades, but their hate isn't about me, it's about themselves so I pay it no mind.

[curiositykilledthecat]

You know, sunday night, Mia(Diaperedwitch) and another ABDL friend, Josh(not on this site) went out for sushi. she had her pacifier and he was wearing Winnie the Pooh overalls. Nobody said a word to us, though I dressed normal minus the crinkling sound. People who take notice tend to be the ones who have issues of their own that they manifest onto others. I've never been one to cram my lifestyle down anyones throat, I don't force my faith upon people nor my kink. It's easy to get along with people for the most part.

edited to fix grammar, content unchanged.

[rosalie.bent]

You know, sunday night, Mia(Diaperedwitch) and anothe rABDL friend Josh(not on this site) went out for sushi. she had her pacifier and he was wearing Winnie the Pooh overalls. Nobody said a word to us, though I dressed normal minus the crinkling sound. People who take notice tend to be the ones who have issues of their own that they manifest onto others. I've never been one to cram my lifestyle down anyones throat, I don't force my faith upon people nor my kink. It's easy to get along with people for the most part.

"People who take notice tend to be the ones who have issues of their own that they manifest onto others."

Thats just silly and quite unreasonable. It could just as easily be said that by openly forcing your AB choices onto others that you "have issues of (your) own that (you) manifest onto others". Didnt we grow out of that "i can do whatever I want" nonsense when we left school and discovered the real world?

[Repaid1]

If I wanted to pick apart and analyze the above statement, then yes it could be reversed. But as a AB for over 30 years, it is my opinion that the first phrase was essentially correct. Most people that have to remark on others, do so as they have the issues with themselves and have to say something to make their own self feel better about their own shortcomings. Sad but true in my observations. I have done like Bri and been out and about in full AB garb, and for the most part the outcome was either curiosity or dismissal, not so much as a disgust, well only when it was figured out that I had all the girls around me

[BriGuy]

In the real world we CAN do whatever we want. We just have to be willing to accept the outcome of our actions.

[sarah_ab]

teenagers walk around with their pants down to their knees, showing the world their underwear, woman walk around with skirts so low cut you almost see between their legs, and shirts so low cut you see all but their nipples.

People who believe they are vampires walk around in all black with capes and canes and makeup, talking about blood and thirst etc...

People who are steampunk walk around wearing elements of that genre in their clothing, their mode of transportation, their everyday speak.

someone who is ab wears a diaper under a pair of overalls with a winny the pooh shirt and a pacifier ... How is this any more "in your face" than the above? Infact there are no underwears being shown, there are no body parts all but exposed in hte first two examples.

Now in bri's pic Tami would clearly be assumed by almost everyone to be 'in costume' before any other assumption is made.

We were driving down the street and my boyfriend and I saw a girl who we thought "oh man she's totally into LARPing" and we actually turned around to drive by her again to get a better veiw and it was them we realized she was actually just an AB, dressed to the nines as an AB. But even OUR first thought at seeing that was she was in costume for something.... and honestly, there is still a chance she could have been.... but on a second drive by the chance was much less...

In todays society, people dress WEIRD, people dress extremely sexual, provocative, teenagers and young adults revel in dressing outlandish and rediculous... The way Bri was dressed alone would only get a double take if someone happened to notice the pacifier... and even than the only reason i would not think he was a raver is because ravers wear pacifiers around their necks, not on an actualy pacifier attachment thing..

If i had to chose between the woman who might as well be naked on the street, and the guys who's pants are so low i can see all their undwear, or the way bri was dressed in that picture.. i'd pick bri everytime....

[rosalie.bent]

In the real world we CAN do whatever we want. We just have to be willing to accept the outcome of our actions.

Yes we can killl someone as long as we dont mind jail for life. Seriously though, was that meant to be a helpful statement? In the real world - the one with jobs, families, careers etc - the notion that you can just dress up as an AB in public and not have any negative consequences is naive. And sarah, you mentioned teens and young adults... what about everyone else? Teens can get away with ridiculous clothing as it is almost a rite of passage. But the rest of us cannot do so.

And of course no one has mentioned that dressing as an AB in public may offend other people. And despite the simplistic 'it is their problem' statements, other people have rights as well. Look, I'd like it if it were possible for Abs to dress more openly in public. Mine sure would like to, but that just isnt the case. There may be places and events where you can but in general day-to-day life, no you cant.

[curiositykilledthecat]

Wait, what the hell just happened?

There's a big difference between doing your own thing and imposing it upon someone else. Am I imposing my will on another person if I wear a christian t-shirt, any appearal representing a sports team i like or a work shirt, because then I'm imposing the values of the business i work for? There's a huge dfference between being yourself and being comfortable with who you are and needing to be a walking "cry for attention". Hell, my little one gets compliments for her stuffed wolf, it's not uncommon for girls to have some sort of stuffed animal or trinket in their purse. As for people getting offended, it's not my problem if my existence, which is in no way, shape or form directly impacting them, causes them to get butt hurt over something they dislike. Again, I don't go out looking for attention, the most I do with the scene outside an event or my home is wear under my normal clothes so there isn't much to get offended over. Would i be comfortable hanging out with the guy in a goth lolita dress and high heels, probably not but it doesn't mean that i have the right to demand this person conform to whatever semblence of normality I hold. Plus my sense of normal died about two years ago when I spent a night talking to a corss dresser with a fairy costume and giant penis wand. I kept wanting to crawl into my skin but after 45 minutes of talking to this person, they were pretty cool and not scary.(This was at a kink event and not at the lcoal mall or any place where this would be an issue) Basically i look at any person as an oppertunity and not an obstacle to overcome, unless they make themselves an obstacle.

[curiositykilledthecat]

Basically do whatver you want that is within the legal confines of your society but understand that you are subject to criticism while in the court of public opinion.

[rosalie.bent]

Wait, what the hell just happened?

There's a big difference between doing your own thing and imposing it upon someone else. Am I imposing my will on another person if I wear a christian t-shirt, any appearal representing a sports team i like or a work shirt, because then I'm imposing the values of the business i work for? There's a huge dfference between being yourself and being comfortable with who you are and needing to be a walking "cry for attention". Hell, my little one gets compliments for her stuffed wolf, it's not uncommon for girls to have some sort of stuffed animal or trinket in their purse. As for people getting offended, it's not my problem if my existence, which is in no way, shape or form directly impacting them, causes them to get butt hurt over something they dislike. Again, I don't go out looking for attention, the most I do with the scene outside an event or my home is wear under my normal clothes so there isn't much to get offended over. Would i be comfortable hanging out with the guy in a goth lolita dress and high heels, probably not but it doesn't mean that i have the right to demand this person conform to whatever semblence of normality I hold. Plus my sense of normal died about two years ago when I spent a night talking to a corss dresser with a fairy costume and giant penis wand. I kept wanting to crawl into my skin but after 45 minutes of talking to this person, they were pretty cool and not scary.(This was at a kink event and not at the lcoal mall or any place where this would be an issue) Basically i look at any person as an oppertunity and not an obstacle to overcome, unless they make themselves an obstacle.

Fair comment but if you as a kink-friendly, kink-experienced, kinkster took 45 minutes to stop wanting to 'crawl into your skin' what do you think the rest of the vanilla community would have thought? Now it was an event so that is different but extrapolate that to the outside world and ask yourself who a vanilla person in a vanilla situation would feel about an overt AB all dressed up that way? Would they perhaps also want to 'crawl into their skin'.

it just seems that the desire to be openly AB - which I fully understand and would love to see being accepted - doesnt seem to take into account the wishes of the very large majority of vanilla people. Your rights dont include the right to gnore THEIR rights. it is a complex question still as it deals with competing rights of various people.

I just remember the example of the girl whoe outed herself as an AB on TV - which is not dissimilar to what we are talking about - and lost her job as a result. No it's not fair, but it was not surprising. We need to be cleverer than just assume that we have the right to beopenly AB and not think that there could be a lot of very negative outcomes.

[rosalie.bent]

Basically do whatver you want that is within the legal confines of your society but understand that you are subject to criticism while in the court of public opinion.

I like it!

The caveat however is UNDERSTANDING the possible ramifications.

[sarah_ab]

Wait just a minute here. You were originally talking abotu regressive abs - which you make clear is completely different than those who engage in AB play as a kink or a fetish... so you cannot now talk about kinks and vanilla and exposing them to this if this.... either we are talking about regressive ab's or we are talking about people who engage in ab behavior for sexual reasons... you can't suddenly bring up the fetish thing when the entire time you express how it is completely different than what you are talking about.

The girl who lost her job..went on a show called the Secret lives of women, which was a show about sexual fetish's mind you, and stated she engaged in her sexual fetish behavior in the preschool setting She also described how she encouraged her underage sister to engage in her fetish behavior by referring to her boyfriend as her daddy. Whether or not it was sexual for the girl, she was on a show about sexual fetish's... so that is how it will be perceived.

YEither we are talking about ABs who are regressive and therefore this is not sexual, or we are talking about those for who this is sexual... but you can't have it both ways.

[curiositykilledthecat]

Wait a minute, I am a little of clumn a. and a little of Column B. I don't think that the two are as disticnt as we're making them out to be. Basiclaly when regressed it's nonsexual but there's times where it doesn't have to be.

[rosalie.bent]

Wait just a minute here. You were originally talking abotu regressive abs - which you make clear is completely different than those who engage in AB play as a kink or a fetish... so you cannot now talk about kinks and vanilla and exposing them to this if this.... either we are talking about regressive ab's or we are talking about people who engage in ab behavior for sexual reasons... you can't suddenly bring up the fetish thing when the entire time you express how it is completely different than what you are talking about.

The girl who lost her job..went on a show called the Secret lives of women, which was a show about sexual fetish's mind you, and stated she engaged in her sexual fetish behavior in the preschool setting She also described how she encouraged her underage sister to engage in her fetish behavior by referring to her boyfriend as her daddy. Whether or not it was sexual for the girl, she was on a show about sexual fetish's... so that is how it will be perceived.

YEither we are talking about ABs who are regressive and therefore this is not sexual, or we are talking about those for who this is sexual... but you can't have it both ways.

The thread is now talking about AB behaviour in public. The motivations - regression or fetish - are immaterial as far as the rest of the community are concerned.

[rosalie.bent]

Wait a minute, I am a little of clumn a. and a little of Column B. I don't think that the two are as disticnt as we're making them out to be. Basiclaly when regressed it's nonsexual but there's times where it doesn't have to be.

You are correct curiosity. While sexual diaper fetish and regressive AB are two distinct behaviours, many - if not most - tend to display both behaviours. Some regressive ABs are completely non-sexual and have no diaper fetish involved. Some diaper fetishists have zero AB side. But a large number have both behaviours in various ratios.

[DailyDi]

Spend an hour on peopleofwalmart.com and then rethink if it's so wrong for an AB to be seen in childish/sissy clothes so long as they are dressed. Being yourself isn't "forcing" it on others.

[rosalie.bent]

Spend an hour on peopleofwalmart.com and then rethink if it's so wrong for an AB to be seen in childish/sissy clothes so long as they are dressed. Being yourself isn't "forcing" it on others.

and the entire purpose of peopleofwalmart.com is to MOCK and CRITICISE the way people dress in public. You possibly couldnt have chosen a worse example. And 'being yourself' is never the sole factor in determining acceptable behaviour in public.

[sarah_ab]

so then your husband wearin 24/7 without a physical need for them is not him wearing ab stuff in public? im confused you posted. a whole thread about all the things you have to pack when traveling with an adult baby includig pacifiers, diapers, colorig books, dresses etc... etc.... how is that not forcin it upon others? the airline security who opens your bags, the hotel staff who clean your rooms and everyone who is in the vicinity of him while he has a diaper on? and anytime you are in public and make any comment or gesture to him in the mommy role you are also forcing this on others whether they are aware or not .....

but its interesting how there is a distinc line between regressive and fetish abs .... except when suddenly you dont think the line applies anymore? so

no matter why a person does it ANY sort of behavior that could be construed as having ties to ab is forcing it on others?

dear lord ive got to redecorate my entire cubicle

[rosalie.bent]

Sarah, you seem to take a bit of a delight in misunderstanding me! Firstly, my hubbys diaper need is due to incontinence. And I am surprised that I have to explain that wearing OVERT AB clothing in public means that it is VISIBLE. A diaper that is not visible is not overt, same as wearing panties, onesies or any other AB wear that is not visible.

Now about travelling with an AB with all the baby things that we need to take... Now if an airline employee opens my bags without my permission (and on domestic flights they don’t) then that is their problem what they see – not mine. IN hotels, we pack the baby things away when we are not there specifically not to offend hotel staff. I am also very careful in public not to be overtly mummy and try to avoid that.

And I repeat that a person’s motivation for dressing overtly AB in public is irrelevant to the vanilla person who is offended by it.

[DailyDi]

Someone doesn't seem nearly accepting as she claims to be.

[rosalie.bent]

Someone doesn't seem nearly accepting as she claims to be.

I dont think you get my point. I am more than used to the sight of a fully dressed AB sissy. If I saw one in public I would be surprised, buut hardly shocked. But that is not the point. What about everyone else? what about the people who have no idea that ABs even exist nevermind what they are? What about them? When you talk about 'accepting' you are not taking into consideration the opinions or expectations of others and that it what I am referring to. OTHER PEOPLE! Dont you think other people have the right to NOT see what they would feel was an offensive sight? Doing so is considered to be engaging in a 'coercive paraphilia' where you are engaging other people in your paraphilia without their consent.

I wish public AB were possible but of course it is easy to wish that knowing it is not going to happen.

[Guest *~Andi~*]

Ive been biting my tongue cuz many ppl dont like what I say... but Im done doing that.

Im sorry its not like there is a college degree in AB. In my personal opinion, and Im sure others as well, all of your data, Rosalie, comes from your own experience and your own opinion. Now with that said.... Im sure that you wont like my opinion, nor do I care truth be told. However, if you choose to put your beliefs out there or your opinions or however it is you choose to refer to them, then be prepared for people to disagree with you. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, as are you. BUT.... ranting on other posts for it is wrong. Please refrain from it, cuz no one seems appreciative of it.

Thank you!

[rosalie.bent]

Ive been biting my tongue cuz many ppl dont like what I say... but Im done doing that.

Im sorry its not like there is a college degree in AB. In my personal opinion, and Im sure others as well, all of your data, Rosalie, comes from your own experience and your own opinion. Now with that said.... Im sure that you wont like my opinion, nor do I care truth be told. However, if you choose to put your beliefs out there or your opinions or however it is you choose to refer to them, then be prepared for people to disagree with you. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, as are you. BUT.... ranting on other posts for it is wrong. Please refrain from it, cuz no one seems appreciative of it.

Thank you!

Andrea, thanks for your post. But if there is one thing I find quite annoying is the highlighted section of your post.

You are not the only person who claims that everything I say and write is entirely subjective opinion. I have probably stated 20 times on here and other places that I did extensive research, sent initial drafts out to over 600 people plus accessed the surveys and works of others. I get pretty tired of being repeatedly accused of not having researched any of this and even after repeating the above, still get the same claims from the same people. I also get pretty annoyed at being accused of 'ranting' when mostly all I do is have an opinion, hold it strongly and have data to back it up. Yes, i do challenge the beliefs of some and the status quo in general. That is the general scientific process of advancing understanding in any area. I dont mind debate and in fact love it. But it would be really nice if people would attack my MESSAGE and not me in particular (not saying that you did that btw).

Every now and then you read posts from people bemoaning the lack of scientific understanding or data on the subject of AB. But when you attempt to do it, you get what is a remarkable degree of flak and abuse from people.

A university degree in AB is a fascinating notion although it is more likely to be a single topic within a Psychology major. But if it were to exist, you can be very sure that the usual suspects would say it was crap.