Rani

Have the previous years at the pig roast been fun? What was it about last years that wasn't so good? (other than being the time you started to have bad dreams) Would it be worth focussing on the good years and how much you've enjoyed them? Your family sound fantastic and very supportive. You haven't let them down in the least by revealing your fetish. If anything you've created a stronger bond with them for showing them how much you trust them and for letting them help you. If you were my son, I'd be so proud of you for coming to me with this and I'd want to help you in every way I possibly could. As for yourself. Take a look at where you were last year and then take a look at where you are now. Ok, you're not 100% happy and bouncing off the walls, but I think from reading this that you've come a long way. It's an uphill climb (isn't everything?) and with the right help you will get there. I think there are two ways of looking at the diaper wearing for this weekend: 1. Will you be too scared of anyone possibly noticing to fully enjoy yourself? If so, don't wear one this time and get a little more experience and confidence in wearing them around other people and leave it until next year. 2. Do you need to wear them to help you cope with the day and the bad things associated with it? If that's the case then wear them. Everyone will be too busy looking at your smiley face and wondering what your secret is (I mean in general terms not fetish) and they'll never guess unless you tell them. And let's face it, they don't need to know anyway. You need to do what you feel most comfortable doing. Incidentally, I just looked up the meaning of suicidal dreams (I don't know if you believe in all that) and it's actually nothing to do with suicide. Yes it can mean that you're depressed, but it can also mean that you're ending one chapter of your life and possibly having trouble moving on. Or even that you did something that you regret. Not so bad after all eh? I honestly believe that you need to speak to someone that knows all the right questions to ask you. That's what the professionals do. They ask and help you to figure out what the problem is that's holding you back and making you feel this way. They are there to help you and although they may seem like the enemy at times, really they're not. Give that number your pastor gave you a call and then give yourself a big pat on the back for taking such a big step. Other than all of that, you've got all of us backing you up and wishing you a lovely weekend and future xx

Gravity makes a difference for me. Although I can go lying down, I find it much easier when everything is pointing downwards. When I'm sat on a chair though, I find it naturally slows the flow. Personally, I find standing easier.

Reek

You're on. Just pick the hotel down the road and I'll escort you back after a few pints (you are talking about pints of whiskey? )

Born

Thank you Baby Brian xx We've moved on now and whenever we do cross paths and I hear "I'll call in for coffee." I whisper a "yeah right!" and smile now I'm not bothered. I have far too many hobbies for friends any way. Maybe that's me being selfish. The quacky one asked how devoted we were to our friends and I was just saying that I give my everything, but feel I get little in return. Perhaps I will make a friend one day that'll meet up for coffee when they say they will. Until then, I'm content

Lode

I'm a loner and don't have any friends. Online friends yes, but none that I spend any more than five physical minutes with. I think my expectations of friendship must be too high. Whenever a friend has said they'll call in for coffee, then I think they'll do just that and I'm daft enough to sit waiting for them. But experience has proven that they rarely do. I don't say things if I don't mean them so if I say let's meet up for coffee then I arrange it and am there at the set time. I've never been late (I was even early for my own wedding!) and hate putting people out so if I say I'm going to do something, I do. I never get the same from those I've made friends with though, and I just end up disappointed and go back to life on my own where I'm happy anyway.

Somebody's Me by Enrique Iglesias

That's how I talk all the time! Tis my accent ya see. Ev'ry day is pirate day fer me.

Park

Dark

Marl

Hair

Pain

Heap

Meat

Plus

Slam

Stag

Seal

Prat

Grip