10 replies to this topic

[peelover]

I just recently accepted the fact that i am bisexual and I told my best friend. I'm so confused right now and could really use a hug and some advice. (I'm a guy)

[musicaddict]

Congratulations on accepting it and on being brave enough to come out. A lot of people never manage either. How did your friend take it? I'd offer a virtual hug, but I'm not the touchy-feely type.

Coming out is always hard. I told my best friend and cousin at the same time in casual conversation, neither cared, just needed a moment to add the information into my file. I think my dad knows, but I know he doesn't care about sexuality. The rest of my family will find out when they see it say interesting in men and women on my facebook page.

[tcc]

So, you're bisexual. If you don't hit on your friend for sex, and totally ruin the friendship by doing so, being bisexual is no big deal. You have to separate friends and sex partners.
As far as "coming out", I'll never understand WHY people think they need to tell other people about their AB/DL, well, diaper "thing". It's like Dr. Laura says when confessing a lie you've been hiding, like cheating on a spouse, it may make YOU feel better, but NOW, you've saddled someone you care about with YOUR thing. And, what does your revelation about YOU do to THEM, and then what do they do with YOU regarding that information.
If we reveal to make us feel better about ourselves or legitimize what we do that makes us feel different, it is not a positive thing for those around us. People in our "community" simply need to accept themselves for who they are and how they are, and embrace it, knowing that the only thing they are into is choosing (most, anyway, incons excluded) and perhaps, using, a legitimate, legal product - absorbent underwear - diapers - for its intended purpose. It's OUR "thing". So what? Get over the guilt and self-loathing. Enjoy being different!

[ItchyTasty]

When I came out being bi, yes I'm male as well, it's just a stupid game character my pic and username,LOL...
My friends mostly didn't care, however a few of them were homophobic, one guy got scared and thought I was going to hit on him. Well I don't chat up straight people that I know are straight and are my friends,lol.
A few girls I know are religious nutjobs (of the bad kind) and called me greedy and my ex gf thought it was wrong. They are both arseholes now. Least it shows who my true friends are...

[Bettypooh]

....Least it shows who my true friends are...

This. It's sad that it takes something like coming out to know for sure who has been your real friend and who hasn't. If it can be bitter, it's also somewhat comforting to know that whoever is left in your life can be counted on. Those who you lose in the process weren't really friends so don't let them bring you down; trade their loss for the more close and open friendships with your real friends.

Bettypooh

[kootzkoo]

congrats on coming out!

it was never a big deal for me, everyone i came out bisexual to never made a big deal out of it, but I never made friends with people who I knew were close-midned/ignorant, they don't interest me..

the more you see others accept you, the easier time you will have accepting yourself

[lovelylittle]

I completely agree with the person above who said that it shows you who your real friends are. I have never had a lasting relationship with a woman simply because I never met the right one so I never had a need to come out to my family, but all of my friends know. They were all very accepting (it's a little different when you're a girl, I know) but I did have one very religious female friend who didn't get it and thought I was just 'greedy' or wanted more options to be promiscuous. She's no longer a friend of mine and I don't miss her.

Congratulations on coming out- I think it's incredibly brave of you and i'm sure it feels better to have someone know your 'secret.'

[xSqwigglex]

This. It's sad that it takes something like coming out to know for sure who has been your real friend and who hasn't. If it can be bitter, it's also somewhat comforting to know that whoever is left in your life can be counted on. Those who you lose in the process weren't really friends so don't let them bring you down; trade their loss for the more close and open friendships with your real friends.

Bettypooh

This is exactly what I say to myself all the time! However nobody really cared that I'm bisexual, I told them that it's nothing I can help and I was born like it and I accept who I am ^.^

[DiaperPony]

It is definitely true. A while back I managed to wake up and escape a widespread religious cult. Not much happened at first, but I noticed every time I posted about it, I would lose more "friends" on Facebook. I decided that I wanted to shed a few more false friends so I openly posted about my opposition to CA prop 8 (as well as a few other things). I lost a lot of "friends" with that.. but there was an awesome result. Due to my stance, a friend still trapped in the religion realized I could be trusted and came out of the closet. We aren't really close or anything, we never were.. but it was cool.

Since then I've engaged other silly things like my pony/brony thing. No friends were shed. I'm sure I could bring out the DL thing too without any big deal.. but there is no reason to, because that's private.

[Leilin]

My best friend came out to me some years ago... rather amusingly, actually.

He's not the most talkative person ever, and is autistic (full on. Musical savant, actually, kinda awesome).

He, his partner (who I only knew was his friend) and I were chilling out gaming, and he and I went out to get lunch later.

"By the way, John and I have been having sex."

My response "Oh."

Short conversation. He knew I'd be implicitly supportive, of course. We've been friends for almost 20 years now (this was 4 years ago). He knows, of course, that I wet the bed and what I wear for it. Hard to get around that at sleepovers.

Sorry if it's a bit of a derail. I thought I'd share a fun coming out story.

[Rexx]

Either I have balls of steel or am half-retarded, it's a toss up. I came out publicly on Facebook, to a few friends, and my Mom several weeks after I identified what I was feeling. All my friends have been supportive and even my Mom said I'm her freak and she'll always love me, whether I bring home a boy or girl.

I'm blessed to have good friends and a great Mom!