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Joakims journey towards diaper dependancy


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Hi! short intro first. Ive been a life long abdl who had the interest in diapers from a pretty young age and always been fascinated by them for some reason. The recent years my mind have been going towards full time wearing and I think I am getting to a point where its time to actually take the leap. I have been having some small issues with post-micturition dribble, but been doing ok ish with just taking extra time on the toilet before getting off it. I am hoping that having this log will make it easier to go through with the steps during the diaper training. Sort of make me accountable and not chicken out and go back to the good old normal underwear.

 

Recently I found out that the pharmacies here have a subscription, so when you place an order you can make an arrangement that they will continue shipping it to you every 2 weeks, month and so on. This will ensure that I always have a steady stream of diapers and have to take an extra step if I ever get the urge to stop. My plan is to start with pull ups during work and diapers at home. Then gradually increasing time in diapers at work. My choice of pull ups is the tena pants super and tena slip maxi at home for now and during night time, then later on change from the pull ups to tena slip plus or super at work and at daytime when home, while still sticking with the maxi for nighttime use.

 

With the training, I am only settling for #1 and possible bedwetting, allthough I know this will be a long and hard thing to accomplish. The hardest part for me is the social stigma and being worried what others might think, so the psycological aspect is my hardest challenge so far. Any tips is greatfully apriciated!

 

So officialy this is my first weekend back in diapers. I still plan to wear boxers as a fixation pant and also to sort of hide the diapers somewhat at work.

 

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Good luck, I recently embarked on the same journey and am going about it the same way you described.  I’m wearing north shore lite pull ups (black) for work and mega max diapers otherwise.  I trained myself to bed wet years ago so I’ve got that step behind me already.  I’m 14 days in and so far so good 

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15 hours ago, joakim_ said:

Hi! short intro first. Ive been a life long abdl who had the interest in diapers from a pretty young age and always been fascinated by them for some reason. The recent years my mind have been going towards full time wearing and I think I am getting to a point where its time to actually take the leap. I have been having some small issues with post-micturition dribble, but been doing ok ish with just taking extra time on the toilet before getting off it. I am hoping that having this log will make it easier to go through with the steps during the diaper training. Sort of make me accountable and not chicken out and go back to the good old normal underwear.

@joakim_:

Since the area you are posting in is what it is I don't want to take away from your desires.  However, the comments about "post-micturition dribble" tells me that you may have another issue, that if you haven't talked to your doctors including a urologist, probably warrants looking into.  At the age currently listed for you (27), which is probably from when you joined (about 10 years ago), even 37 is a bit early for dealing with an enlarged prostate, but not unheard of.    So, in my opinion, based on the little information you have listed, you may want to check in with a doctor about possible prostate growth, potential early on set BPH, or maybe even other prostate issues that should be reviewed to make sure you don't have a more serious problem.  My initial post micturition dribble was from early onset BPH.  Some items I expect the doctors will deal with include DRE (digitial rectal exam), PSA and possibly also free PSA.

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13 hours ago, zzyzx said:

@joakim_:

Since the area you are posting in is what it is I don't want to take away from your desires.  However, the comments about "post-micturition dribble" tells me that you may have another issue, that if you haven't talked to your doctors including a urologist, probably warrants looking into.  At the age currently listed for you (27), which is probably from when you joined (about 10 years ago), even 37 is a bit early for dealing with an enlarged prostate, but not unheard of.    So, in my opinion, based on the little information you have listed, you may want to check in with a doctor about possible prostate growth, potential early on set BPH, or maybe even other prostate issues that should be reviewed to make sure you don't have a more serious problem.  My initial post micturition dribble was from early onset BPH.  Some items I expect the doctors will deal with include DRE (digitial rectal exam), PSA and possibly also free PSA.

Hi and thanks for your concern. I have not mentioned it to my doctor as I rarely go in. But with what you just said it might be a good idea to make an appointment, just to rule certain things out.

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First update now 29.07, as it has been roughly 7 days of constant wearing. I changed my mind a bit and decided just to plunge into wearing the slip supers all the time as daytime diaper. Ive been practicing wetting the diaper while lying down for 20 minutes before going to bed and 15 minutes every morning, and even though I still find this position a bit awkward, there is progress.

 

Wearing to work the first week has been suprisingly fine. Allthough things did take for the worse on thursday when the bathroom Ive been using had its lock broken, so when its change time I have to use another one that also has another bathroom beside it, where the other occupant might hear something. For changing Ive been aiming for around 4-5h, to avoid any skin issue, even if the diaper is not well used.

 

Last in this update is a few stats from the diaperstash app:

Favorite diaper: Tena slip maxi. I have an abundance of these at the moment, so they have been my go to diaper while at home after work. This will change once I get my first shipment of the slip plus.

Total diapers used the first week: 36. At the moment I am roughly going through 5 diapers in average per day. 34 of these were wet, while two were dry when waking up in the morning and unable to make myself go while lying down before work.

Average time per change: 4h,35m. Well within my goal for diaper changes.

 

For the next week I will continue my practice to wet in different positions.

 

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I have developed way faster than I expeted. 

On 7/23/2023 at 2:06 AM, joakim_ said:

With the training, I am only settling for #1 and possible bedwetting, allthough I know this will be a long and hard thing to accomplish. The hardest part for me is the social stigma and being worried what others might think, so the psycological aspect is my hardest challenge so far. Any tips is greatfully apriciated!

 

So officialy this is my first weekend back in diapers. I still plan to wear boxers as a fixation pant and also to sort of hide the diapers somewhat at work.

 

It took me a long time to get comfortable with the "social stigma" you mentioned. It took a while but i learned it doesn't exist. I used to wear super baggy clothes now i dress a lot cuter. (short shorts, tank top, etc.) As long as it isn't completly visible, even slightly showing no one will really say anything. most people are too wrapped up in whatever they are doing to care what people are wearing. I don't go intentionally showing it off, but I don't dress in nearly as many layers as i used too. 

only time it matters for me is if I go somewhere nice. like a Resturant, date, event and so on. In those cases i just wear a fancy dress.

I only had one instance of someone seeing my diaper and commenting and they just asked if i was ok and made a shirt gesture. Afterwards I realised that was actually pretty nice of them since i wasn't paying attention to that.

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11 hours ago, prideful said:

I have developed way faster than I expeted. 

It took me a long time to get comfortable with the "social stigma" you mentioned. It took a while but i learned it doesn't exist. I used to wear super baggy clothes now i dress a lot cuter. (short shorts, tank top, etc.) As long as it isn't completly visible, even slightly showing no one will really say anything. most people are too wrapped up in whatever they are doing to care what people are wearing. I don't go intentionally showing it off, but I don't dress in nearly as many layers as i used too. 

only time it matters for me is if I go somewhere nice. like a Resturant, date, event and so on. In those cases i just wear a fancy dress.

I only had one instance of someone seeing my diaper and commenting and they just asked if i was ok and made a shirt gesture. Afterwards I realised that was actually pretty nice of them since i wasn't paying attention to that.

Thank you for the reply! The social stigma part I think more relates to work colleagues, or people that I know. Don't care to much about strangers. But do get your point.

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one of my co-workers found out, they just asked a couple of questions and never brought it up again. I don't try to make it obvious at work, People won't care. The average joe is more curious than anything. If it doesn't affect them they don't care. I haven't had any mean comments or drama since I started wearing out of the house. I can't talk for everybody but from "MY" experience I would have to say 99% of people don't care. Disabilities are so much more open and recognizable these days. I will admit there are specific groups in my town that would probably be mean about it. However, if you are around those groups frequently it is time to change more than your diaper LMAO.

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Update 2, 05.08.23.

 

Done with my second week. This week has had it's up and downs. I reverted back to wearing pull ups during work 4 days this week. Mainly because the toilet Ive been using to change at had it's door broken. Hoping to be back in taped diapers soon though!

 

The luying in bed practice seem to have worked somewhat. Had a decent amount of alcohol yesterday, and when I woke up this morning I had even leaked. Luckly the pad had soaked it up. Tad embarrasing, but also positives to take from it. wetting while sitting also seems to get easier, nut still lots of practice left to do.

 

Also had a horrific experience this week. Somone at work needed a tool, as I was up in a lift, I told him it's down there someone and he actually went to my own bagpack where I keep my changing supplies. He had already opened it up, when I noticed what he was doing. Don't think he understood what he saw though as nothing was said. Not fun at all.

 

Total diapers used this week: 24.

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that does tend to happen. My sister is a tad snoopy. We took a day trip to a turist trap to get out of town. I had the big bag so I held everything. Come change time. We were at the bar. She started going through it just as I was about to go change. (wanted something like water or something) I just said I needed the bag but she had already grabbed it. LOL as soon as she opened it she apologised and handed it back too me. Nice moment but a little awkward. Didn't say anything afterwards.

 

5 hours ago, joakim_ said:

Update 2, 05.08.23.

 

Done with my second week. This week has had it's up and downs. I reverted back to wearing pull ups during work 4 days this week. Mainly because the toilet Ive been using to change at had it's door broken. Hoping to be back in taped diapers soon though!

 

The luying in bed practice seem to have worked somewhat. Had a decent amount of alcohol yesterday, and when I woke up this morning I had even leaked. Luckly the pad had soaked it up. Tad embarrasing, but also positives to take from it. wetting while sitting also seems to get easier, nut still lots of practice left to do.

 

Also had a horrific experience this week. Somone at work needed a tool, as I was up in a lift, I told him it's down there someone and he actually went to my own bagpack where I keep my changing supplies. He had already opened it up, when I noticed what he was doing. Don't think he understood what he saw though as nothing was said. Not fun at all.

 

Total diapers used this week: 24.

 

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Update 3, 12.08.23

 

Huge progress this week. I am still sticking to pull ups during work, since I got so many many left. On the positive side my first shipment of Tena slip plus came in. 5 packages, which will now come once a month.

 

Being able to pee while lying has become much easier. Now I only have to relaxe for a minute at most to be able to let go in bed. Before I would have to have a really full bladder to be able to. Now its 1 minute tops. I also woke up wet twice this week, but only after a few beers. Woke up with a wet pad once. Need to figure out where it's leaking from and maybe get some PU pants.

 

Overall a good week and hoping for more wet morning diapers without any alcohol the evening before!

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Early post today. So I was having a few beers last night, being close to the weekend and all and 30 minutes ago, I woke up to this huge puddle in the bed. Both happy and annoyed, glad I wet the diaper while sleeping, not happy about the massive leak.

 

Luckily I do have a mattress protector, and also using an old duvet, but might consider getting a protector for that one as well. Also ordered a washable bed pad yesterday. Now I just want 4o wet with no alcohol involved..

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34 minutes ago, joakim_ said:

Early post today. So I was having a few beers last night, being close to the weekend and all and 30 minutes ago, I woke up to this huge puddle in the bed. Both happy and annoyed, glad I wet the diaper while sleeping, not happy about the massive leak.

My experience has been that adult disposables are untrustworthy in bed when sleep-wetting starts.  Can I suggest some absorbent-lined waterproof pants to wear over your disposable at night.  Babykins make great ones but there are also other brands.

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47 minutes ago, oznl said:

My experience has been that adult disposables are untrustworthy in bed when sleep-wetting starts.  Can I suggest some absorbent-lined waterproof pants to wear over your disposable at night.  Babykins make great ones but there are also other brands.

Thanks for the tips. I do have a pair of PU pants,  not absorbent though and doubt they would have done me any good this night. I'll see if I can find any of those if it's possible to get at my country!

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12 hours ago, joakim_ said:

Early post today. So I was having a few beers last night, being close to the weekend and all and 30 minutes ago, I woke up to this huge puddle in the bed. Both happy and annoyed, glad I wet the diaper while sleeping, not happy about the massive leak.

 

Luckily I do have a mattress protector, and also using an old duvet, but might consider getting a protector for that one as well. Also ordered a washable bed pad yesterday. Now I just want 4o wet with no alcohol involved..

Keep at it, you’ll get there.  Years ago I first (as an adult) wet the bed after a beer party.  Now it happens almost every night with nary a drop of alcohol.  It’s a dream come true.  Good luck

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Update 4.

 

So my first month is completed! Time has really gone by. It's still pull ups during work and gym/football. Got roughly 60 pull ups left, which should last me for about 2 months of use. After that I need to figure out if I want to continue with them at work or go over to tape ones.

 

Not noticed much change in the bladder. Do think my next focus is going to be to let go at any urge as I feel that I am quite comfortable wetting in most positions by now.

 

 

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10 hours ago, joakim_ said:

Update 4.

 

So my first month is completed! Time has really gone by. It's still pull ups during work and gym/football. Got roughly 60 pull ups left, which should last me for about 2 months of use. After that I need to figure out if I want to continue with them at work or go over to tape ones.

 

Not noticed much change in the bladder. Do think my next focus is going to be to let go at any urge as I feel that I am quite comfortable wetting in most positions by now.

 

 

I untrained super fast, after I learned how to pee sitting/walking/standing, etc. My next step was to relax at all times. Bit tricky at first but keep focused and you'll see success. Don't force anything out even if it starts to hurt. Let it cone out naturally, then keep relaxed when u flood. That is my main advice.

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  • 6 months later...

Cant believe it's been  4 months already. I kind of gave up at some point, with full tape on diapers at work. Ive reverted back to pull ups at work, abena pants L3. When I was wearing full on diapers I was stressing a bit to much at work with changes, changing to work clothes etc. The pull ups does give me a lot more of freedom. Maybe I will try diapers again at some point, when I am fully comfortable with the thought!

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So, found out that there is someone locally that sells cloth diapers, decided to buy a pair to give it a go at least for night time use for now. Quite looking forward to it!thumb_page_532284a9841bbc2fc5968b209125e592-jpg.webp.b1175fcef598f461039861cf41a92a5b.webp

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