Incontinence

[BabyCat2]

So I've been listening to the urine hypnosis files. And I'm still on my journey with urine incontinence. But here is my question when you train your body to be incontinent does that mean you will also lose control of your poo. This is now day 2 of pooing accidentally. I have no one to clean me so it's into the shower and spray my bum and front and then SOAP. and oh my goodness the smell from the poo ?

 

Any help is greatly appreciated 

[Kif]

Uhm...honestly, maybe approach a doctor? 

You shouldn't be having those kinds of accidents after only 2 days...Hypnosis can do wonders, but that kind of stuff after 2 days is a bit strange.

Generally speaking, yes, you can eventually weaken bowel control by weakening the pelvic floor through urinary untraining...but results vary, and even 'fast' cases take months if not years. Some don't have this problem at all. But I've never heard of this happening within days...

[~Brian~]

2 hours ago, BabyCat2 said:

So I've been listening to the urine hypnosis files. And I'm still on my journey with urine incontinence. But here is my question when you train your body to be incontinent does that mean you will also lose control of your poo. This is now day 2 of pooing accidentally. I have no one to clean me so it's into the shower and spray my bum and front and then SOAP. and oh my goodness the smell from the poo ?

 

Any help is greatly appreciated 

@BabyCat2

good evening:

you have to realize that anything that you're releasing in your diaper is something that your body does not need anymore. That is why you urinate and defecate. It helps you to get rid of the junk that your system doesn't need. Urine and poop are very very acidic, so prolonged exposure to poop and pee on your person will result in a very strong urine smell, and if you're dealing with feces, a very strong smell there. Prolonged contact with poop also can cause reddening of skin so that you will have a very uncomfortable time in a diaper. Some people like to play in it before they change it, and some people like to walk around in it, but me I figure it's easier just to change the thing and make sure I have a dry diaper. Wet ones don't bother me that much, but with dirty ones I have to get taken care of as quickly as possible.

With regard to training and hypnosis tapes:hypnosis is only good if your body is susceptible to the suggestion that is being put forward . I'm sure with that with a lot of help, hypnosis can be used to help you set your mindset properly, but as far as hypnotizing someone and then expecting them to wet or mess themselves, I don't think it works that well. Your mind has to be able to open itself up, and receive the instructions, and you have to get into your subconscious mind in order to do that. I don't think hypnosis really works unless you have somebody who can actually help you so that the hypnosis works . Otherwise it's just somebody that's making a tape that's a whole bunch of noise , and it won't work well. You have to condition your body to accept the commands that are being given. If you don't do that, it's just a bunch of noise, and certain people are not weak minded, so it may take awhile , but most times I don't think it works that well. Congratulations to those that it does help, but for me I would think it does not work that well.

as far as training goes: what you are trying to do is to become incontinent correct? Does this mean that eventually that you want to be Incontinent both ways? Some people want full incontinence, while some people may want only incontinence of urine, some may only want incontinence of feces, it will be up to you as to decide what you're going for, and to adjust your training appropriately to achieve the goal. Be mindful however, that it could take longer than usual, because you have to condition your body to say that it is OK to release in a diaper. Remember that your potty training is in bread, and we have been taught ever since we got out of diapers that it is not appropriate to mess yourself or pee yourself, and you have to go into the toilet. You have to overcome that programming in your head and reprogram your mind to say that it is OK to release in a diaper.

One thing I can say is there are two things that you need to know. One of them is, that just like a baby would have baby wipes when you change its diaper, an adult can get those same wipes, but they get them in adult sizes, and if you get the right ones, that are big enough, you can take a wipe and wipe yourself off real good, and get the poop off, by using a wipe. Then you throw the wipe in your basket and then you end up using another one and you clean yourself up using wipe after wipe until you are clean enough. Then you jump in your shower and you take care of the rest with your hose like you said. You should probably go to the North Shore care site, and pick up the extra large adult wipes. I believe they are like 9 by 13 or longer, and they are quilted: this will allow you to wipe the mess off and get yourself clean before you have to use the hose. Always have quality wipes around, because you will need them later.

Second: you need a good barrier cream: go to northshore care supply and look for barrier cream on the website: what you do is you would put this on after you take a shower but before you put your diaper on or you put it on while you are changing and before you seal it up. Be extra careful that you don't end up getting any topical on the tapes of your diaper, because then it won't stick right and you'll have to use a different diaper. Barrier cream is a must especially if you are totally incontinent both directions. Remember poop has acidic qualities and cause contact with your skin can cause a lot of trouble. Prolonged exposure to poop on your skin will result in skin breakdown or possible other problems. You need to keep your skin clean: I will repeat that again you need to keep your skin clean! If you don't, you will know that you will have the worst rash in the world, and you don't want that. When you wear diapers, sure it's going to be fun for those who do it, but you have to keep yourself healthy, and you have to keep your skin and your body cleaned up. When you end up cleaning yourself up, make sure that you're wiping yourself down sufficiently, and that you're keeping yourself clean: shave all of your pubic hair down so that it is not long or a hindrance, because that can also hold bad smells in, and also if you don't have much hair in the pubic region, it's easier to clean up the mess.

Like I've told other people: you don't become incontinent simply because you put a diaper on. You have to decide if you want to become incontinent, and the way you become that way is to train your body. The easiest way to train your body is to put a diaper on and just wear it 24 hours a day, and change it whenever it needs to be changed. Eventually, you will get used to the fact that you have a diaper on, and your body will have the OK to release whatever it's holding. It may take time to get there, but you will, sometimes up to two years, so if you're not getting what you want, don't give up, but realize that you're not gonna be able to become incontinent just because you put a diaper on or you're wearing one: you have to train your body to use it, and basically it's conditioning just like hypnotism is conditioning, and it takes time.

I believe there are many people who are incontinent of urine but not of feces. As far as I know, putting a diaper on and using it for #1 is not going to cause you to lose control of #2.  Friends of mine who are totally incontinent have no choice, and they will release what they're holding, whenever they feel it, and sometimes, you can't feel it until it happens, and then you have done the deed. Then you can smell what you've done and you know you have to change.I don't think that it is possible for you to end up being incontinent for a urine, and then automatically losing control of your bowels and just messing uncontrollably. Just like potty training, you have to train your body to do what you wanted to do. You won't necessarily lose control of your bowels just because you were incontinent of urine . It all depends on a person's situation: someone who is totally incontinent, which means that they don't have a choice, and they use their diapers for everything, is different than someone who is training to be incontinent , but the idea is the same. At the end of the day, you will be releasing whatever you're holding in your diaper, and it will smell and it will stink, but that's what that stuff does : you just have to get used to the fact that when you are incontinent you will release . Just like you would change your baby's diaper when it messes or wets, it's gonna be the same thing for an adult . Once you wet your diaper, you are going to change your diaper , and you were going to do the same thing that you would do for a baby as you would do for an adult, you put your powder on, you put on your topicals, rash cream, or whatever it is that they use. Remember when you are a baby, you used all of that stuff , or your parents use that stuff to clean you up . It's no different if you were an adult: you should have exactly the same things in your arsenal , including lotrimin AF: this will eliminate any fungus that you end up getting if you have to kill it , because sometimes you can get some really bad itch down there, and sometimes it will kill the rash , and possibly soothe it.

if you started to put diapers on and you're using them, that tells me that you're conditioning your body to release #1, but you don't wanna release #2. Sometimes you may have accidents, and if you are seriously wanting to be incontinent both ways, those are on purposes, and that is part of the training regimen.  I have been wearing diapers for three years: there are things that you would need in your arsenal to make sure that you're taking good care of yourself: I will list them here

1.  Quality Plastic Backed  diapers: these can be any diaper that work for you, such as a mega Max, or an M4, or whatever diaper that you wish. They could even be cloth diapers if you want to go that far and be washing them, but you probably won't have the time or the patience to be doing cloth diapers. Therefore you should always have a good quality plastic backed diaper. You want a diaper that will hold everything that you are giving it, and you want one that has good order control, because you are going to be releasing fecal matter, and there's going to be times when it'll be a lot easier just to use the diaper to its fullest extent and then clean yourself up. When that happens, you will have to take the diaper off roll it up throw it away, and then take it out to the trash. You should be prepared for that.

2.  Disposal can: these can be purchased online from Amazon, or honest medical, or anywhere that sells these types of cans. You want one that will allow you to hold as many diapers as you you can, but you also have to make sure that you can remove the bags and carry the load, because you will be removing leaves and dumping leaves in your trash container or your dumpster if you're in an apartment complex. I use the jennibell 330: it is an 11 gallon pail that will allow me to they say put in over 100 diapers. Unfortunately that is a laugh, because if you tried to put 100 diapers in that and they were adult diapers it would weigh 500 pounds and you'd never be able to lift it. You have to make sure that you test this out to make sure that you can lift whatever you're placing in the can.

3.  Liners:  liners are indispensable: they are what go into your disposal can so that you can have a bag to receive them. The Jenna bell system allows for us to use the appropriate bags. You simply throw the bag in, and then you end up pulling it up once you get it around the holder, lift up the first bag a little bit, and then pull it down and tie a knot in the end. Each time you change the bag, you end up pulling the bag out, and then you grab enough so that you can cut it off with the cutter inside the door, tie up the bag by tying a knot in the bottom tie a knot in the top of the bag you remove and you can remove the bag.

4.  Disposal bags for diapers: disposal bags are bags that you get from a supplier. They are not the ones that are the liners. The liners are what goes into your disposal can. When you take a diaper off, you take this blue bag, and you open it up and you put whatever you take off in the bag, you tie it off, and you throw it in your disposal can. These can be purchased through North Shore care, and these are dark blue, so no one knows what's inside, and they have order control built into them, so you can just put whatever you want in there tie it off and throw it away. I have 1000 of these, and when I get low again I will reorder some more. These have been dispensable, so I can take them anywhere and put dirty diapers into a bag and tie it off, so it doesn't cause an issue for someone else.

5.  Wipes:these will be a must if you're going to be using the diapers 24/7 for what they are intended for. There'll be times when you end up having a major blowout, and it'll take you a few minutes to clean yourself up. Quilted wipes make that a little easier because it will catch whatever you're trying to wipe off and hold it, and then you can just throw them away. You should have enough wipes so that you don't end up having an issue. Get the adult sized ones, because then you'll be able to use the entire wipe and you won't be wasting little wipes that aren't full size . You should always understand that regardless of whether something says it's flushable or not, flushing wipes down the toilet is not good for plumbing, so do not under any circumstances flush wipes down the toilet, because in some cases the landlord will get very upset with you, and could charge you the fee to come back out and fix it if you flush wipes down the toilet. That's just not a good idea ! But a good idea is to have extra large wipes from North Shore care those are what I use, in fact most of what I purchase comes directly from North Shore care itself, even my mega Max diapers come directly from them, and I have a New Hampshire supplier that I deal with that orders them for me and deals with the prior authorization renewals which happen every six months .

6.  Sundries: these can be anything from barrier cream, cleanser, spray, and A&D ointment or pseudo cream, baby powder baby lotion, lotterman AF, and anything else that you would use to be able to deal with incontinence or clean yourself up good. Always have these sundries available because they will come in handy. If you are going to travel and be able to go anywhere if you're going to be fully diapered, make sure you have a bag that has all of these supplies in it, and even include: diapers, underpads, change of clothes, everything listed in #6, and make sure that you have disposable bags to be able to get rid of whatever you're taking off. You don't want to leave that anywhere in a public restroom, so you want to be able to eliminate it by throwing it in the bucket

7.  Diaper covers, washable underpads, disposable underpads, boosters: these items will be very helpful to you. If you're going to wear diapers, you're gonna wanna put a cover over the top. If you're going to train yourself to wet and mess whenever the need arises, you will need the diaper covers. You may not need to use them at home, because you can just change the diaper when it gets dirty or when it is being used, but if you're working or going out, you need to have a diaper cover that will protect the diaper, because you are using the diaper for what its intended, and you may flood it out or you may end up having leaks, and if you don't have these types of things in your chairs or wherever you're sitting, and you don't have the diaper covers, you will have a major problem. I have six of each color of the trifecta line that North Shore makes. I did that because I wanna make sure that I have enough of these to last period they say that these things last about 75 washes, and if you're using one of them every day, and you take it off and it's wet, you may not be able to wash it right away, so I have an A bucket that is separate from the disposal container, and I take off wet trifectas and throw them in the bucket. Then when I get enough of them, I simply pick up the bucket take it downstairs and wash them. I wash all of my plastic pants together: this way I make sure that they are clean, they are sanitary, and they are dry period if you don't dry those things, you will end up having it smell like mold, and it's not very good. Always use warm water at least, and then run with your dryer on delicate period you don't want to overheat these things, because they may stretch out and then once they end up not working as well, then you have to get rid of them. I have 24 pair of the trifectas, and then I have 24 of the Gary Ware ones. I won't have any problem if I need them, so I've decided to go directly to the trifectas, because it works better.

Sizing:  when you're wearing diapers and you're using the diaper covers always get a size that is one size up from the diaper size that you wear. This means for example if you're a medium diaper wearer, get the large trifectas. If you're a large diaper wearer, get the extra large trifectas. You want these things to be able to cover your diaper and be able to hold whatever you are releasing. A word about the boosters: when you get boosters make sure you're using a booster that is one size above, or one size bigger than the diaper that you're wearing. This means if you're using a large diaper, get the extra large boosters, if you're using a medium diaper, get the large boosters and so on and so on. You want to make sure that your booster fits between the leg guards, and nothing hangs out, so that you have a leak: the worst thing that you can have is a leak, and I guarantee you the first time you have a week and you have it leaking down your pants, or you have half moons on your pants, you will know exactly what you did, and so will everybody else. If you do it right, you should be able to wear your pants and no one will be able to know you have diapers on.

In closing, you have to make sure that you're keeping yourself clean and dry: this does not necessarily mean that the minute you pee in the thing that you have to change it immediately: this simply means that you don't want to wear the diaper for something like 16 hours and have the thing flat out and leak. You will know when your diaper has reached its capacity. It depends on the type of diaper you're using period since the mega Max is the best diaper they make, it has a 12 hour rating, other diapers that are like The Supremes may have an 8 hour rating. So you have to make sure that you know you have the capacity of your diapers. If you don't, you may end up finding out that your bladder may not be able to hold that, and you just may release it.

If you're having accidents, BMS that is, I don't think it's a direct result of you deciding to wear diapers. It takes a while for your system to be trained to allow for you to release in a diaper. When you potty train you are actually learning to not pee in your pants, and those are safety locks: when you are training yourself to use the diaper, you are reversing the process that you learn when you are about four years old. People that don't have any control at all will just simply release when they feel the need, and then they'll have to clean up after themselves. Don't feel guilty if for some reason you are having these issues, but if this continues and you are just releasing BM all the time, get into a doctor and have the doctor look at it, to make sure that something is not wrong. 

Diapers are your friends: they will help you if you need it, and I can tell you that diapers are more comfortable for me and more convenient, and they allow me to be safer. What I have given you above is basically my interpretation of what is going on, and although I'm not a doctor one of the most important things is that you should be checked if you think for one minute that there's something going on that is not normal for you. If you previously did not have accidents, of the number 2 variety, then I would make sure that there's nothing else going on, such as cancer or anything like that, even though there's probably nothing there.

Lastly, don't feel guilty about wearing diapers or using them: once you get used to it, it's no sweat. The first few times you pee it probably won't be bad, and then you will be able to wipe yourself down and change your diaper in a matter of minutes. The first time you have a major blowout, it can take you from one minute to 45 minutes to clean yourself up, because you have to clean up the floor the toilet your clothing anything that you're wearing, and then you have to take a shower and make sure you're nice and clean. Whatever happens when you are doing this, make sure that you're clean. And make sure that you have the right stuff to be able to deal with diaper rash: if you need to use diapers don't worry about it, because it happens to all of us eventually, but make sure that you are checked by your doctor if you have any doubt about anything because you don't want to have a problem that you're not aware of and then end up allowing it to get worse. If the doctor says you're OK, then it's just you having to retrain yourself to only release number one in your diaper. If your intention is to release both in your diaper, then you are also releasing BM in your diaper as well, but it could be convenient at some point, an inconvenient at other points. Make sure you have all your equipment with you, and then take a halfway decent backpack or bag, and put what you need in it so that you can stick it in your car or something else so you can change yourself on the run. There will be plenty of other here on DD that can give you other advice, don't be afraid to continue to ask questions and then respond to posts as you need to. There are a lot of us that are going through the same journey you are, and some of us are having bumps in the road, or unexpected circumstances or consequences. Regardless of what happens, be prepared for it.

Good luck!

Brian

 

[DiapergirlWB]

I'm sorry if brian covered this but i didn't read it all.  I am very good at not hold and just letting it flow.  i don't try and hold either.  I do also suffer from ibs.  When i am in practice with diaper using If I get an ibs attack It will just free flow like urine.  There is nothing I can do to stop it it just runs out immediately because there isn't a subconscious hold in place,  Regular bm i still feel coming and can easily stop if i wanted to.  I personally have never been very successful peeing and not pooping if I have to go...my very first messy accident was because i just wanted to wet my diaper then go to the toilet..when I started to pee i messed myself too.  I have no idea if others are able to hold poop while peeing but i have never been able to.  What you may be experiencing is something similar.

 

[spark]

31 minutes ago, DiapergirlWB said:

I'm sorry if brian covered this but i didn't read it all.  I am very good at not hold and just letting it flow.  i don't try and hold either.  I do also suffer from ibs.  When i am in practice with diaper using If I get an ibs attack It will just free flow like urine.  There is nothing I can do to stop it it just runs out immediately because there isn't a subconscious hold in place,  Regular bm i still feel coming and can easily stop if i wanted to.  I personally have never been very successful peeing and not pooping if I have to go...my very first messy accident was because i just wanted to wet my diaper then go to the toilet..when I started to pee i messed myself too.  I have no idea if others are able to hold poop while peeing but i have never been able to.  What you may be experiencing is something similar.

 

I've heard several theories about this.  One of them is that you lose bowel incontinence first, and then the bladder follows.  You having IBS probably makes that step easier.  I have been wearing daipers near daily for a long time- can't remember.  I have very few unauthorized releases with urine- it happens, but rare.   I don't like pooping in my diaper for the same reasons as you, but I think if I did allow it more often, I would lose complete bladder control.   2 FTRs: one- I like it that way.  I pee in diaper all of the time, and can still get to a toilet if I know it and want to.  2- I've had two unauthorized BMs as an adult/older teen.  One was 16 on a school trip with stomach discomfort (don't like talking about it), and the other was a barium.

[meeko313]

i've seen a few posts here about the link between bladder and bowel incontinence! from what i've gathered, there does seem to be a strong link between the two. while I imagine it's technically different muscles the control each, what i think is the case is that people, or at least most people can't feel the difference between the two, or control them independently very well.

with myself as an example, i'm totally unable to mess without also wetting. i'll note i have zero untraining experience, sadly that wouldn't work with my lifestyle. but any time i go number 2, my bladder always releases too! sometimes it's almost linked a little bit the other way around too. if i wanna really empty my bladder all the way, sometimes a little bit of poo is required!

it does seem that some people have managed to attain bladder incontinence without bowel, so going for just one is technically possible i suppose, but probably a lot more difficult. my conclusion is that if you're really dedicated to achieving incontinence, it's probably best to just...let it happen, all the way. and accept no poopies control either :3