classification Classified: Stellar Remnants (Completed 1/29/2023)

[Nika_lb]

Part 2

[Brutal_Ink]

Sorry for my very long absence everyone! Life has been a little crazy lately and I haven't had much time to write. This will be the last chapter for Stellar Remnants, and I haven't decided yet if I'll be writing anything more for a while. That being said, I'd like to thank you all for reading as well as for being patient with me between updates.

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Chapter 15: (Sin)gularity

Whatever this is, it’s not what Lily imagined death would be like. Her entire body is sore, like she spent the day before working out or doing something really tough physically. Her mouth is parched, and her vision takes a long time to focus when she finally manages to open her eyes.

There’s a steady, consistent beeping coming from near her head, and although it takes a surprising amount of effort to turn her head, she sees that it’s coming from a heart monitor. 

I’m in a hospital? Lily wonders, yawning. It’s only when she moves to rub her eyes that she realizes something is wrong.

Instead of her fingers, a soft fabric meets her face. She blinks, confused, and then looks down and realizes that her hands are encased in a pair of thumbless mittens. She wiggles her fingers and realizes upon further inspection that her right hand is wrapped in bandages underneath the mitten. It doesn’t hurt, thankfully, at least not right now.

She looks around, realizing that the room has padded walls, and the only furniture is the cot she’s lying on. Even the monitoring equipment is set into the wall, there’s nothing loose that she could possibly use to hurt herself.

Even her clothes are basically a one-piece sleeper without feet, and the socks she’s wearing have little grippy pads on the bottom to prevent slips and falls.

Lily shifts, trying to get comfortable, and notices then that her diaper is very swollen and heavy. She hasn’t leaked yet, but she definitely needs a change. Her cheeks warm at this realization.

“M-Maisie?” Lily says, so softly that she can barely hear herself speak, even though the only other sound in the room is the heartbeat monitor.

There’s no response.

Not even a rustling or stirring from anywhere.

Lily feels cold, and her chest is tight, anxiety slowly crushing the breath out of her lungs.

You’re fine! She tells herself sternly. You don’t need to constantly have a grown-up with you to be calm. It’s not like anything can even happen to you in here, anyway.

She chokes back a sob, biting her lip with enough force to draw blood as she fights to keep herself quiet. The emotional pressure she feels is unbearable, and the staccato beep-beep-beep of the monitoring equipment is a grim countdown.

Just when she’s sure she can’t take it anymore, the door to her room slides open.

Lily immediately realizes that the woman in the doorway isn’t Maisie, but she doesn’t look particularly threatening…

“Lily? Honey are you okay?” The woman asks, though it’s not clear whether she expects a reply from Lily. Her tone of voice implies that she’s not exactly hopeful for a verbal response.

Lily tries to get her breathing back under control so she can speak, mentally reviewing the exercises she’d done with Miss Bright, for specifically this kind of situation. However, her body has other ideas, and the only noise that comes out when she attempts to speak is a soft, shaky sob.

“What’s got you so worked up, sweetheart? You’re setting the alarms at my desk off.”  The woman says softly, reaching out to gently stroke Lily’s hair. 

The gesture is more soothing than Lily’d thought it would be and the tightness in her chest slowly begins to ease. She still doesn’t quite trust herself to speak, so she raises a hand to point at the woman, eyebrows raising in a questioning manner.

“I’m Vanessa, hon. I’m you’re nurse while you’re staying here with us at the Red Ridge Rehabilitation Facility.”

Lily’s stomach clenches at the name. For an awful moment, she’s afraid she’s going to be sick.

“Trouble?” Lily manages to croak out, her voice raspy and weak.

Thankfully, Vanessa seems to understand what she’s trying to say. “No, sweetie, you’re not in trouble. This is just a place where you can get a little more one-on-one help than the Behavioral Correction Facility can give you. Given your extenuating circumstances, the state has seen fit to commute your sentence.”

Lily just blinks. What?

“BCFs are meant to guide you toward better decisions, not to drive you to the point of…well…making drastic choices.” Vanessa explains softly, her dark eyes kind and patient.

“Where’s Maisie?” Lily wonders. “She’s my…she was watching me when I…” she can’t even bring herself to say it.

“Maisie Eisenwald?” Vanessa clarifies.

Lily nods. “Yes, that’s her. Is she okay?”

Vanessa’s face is difficult to read, but there’s a heavy kind of sadness in her eyes. “Maisie’s alright. She’s no longer working for the Corrections Division, and I’m not sure when or if you’ll be able to see her again.”

Lily can feel tears welling in her eyes. “Did she get in trouble ‘cause of me?”

“It’s complicated.” Vanessa says after a long pause. “She’s not in trouble, but she’s resigned from the Corrections Division. She took the incident pretty hard, and blames herself for not being fast enough to prevent it.” 

“But, I’m okay!” Lily cries.

“Yes, and we’re all very glad for that.” Vanessa says. “But the outcome could have been very different. You’re incredibly lucky to be alive, Lily. Maisie said she couldn’t bear the thought of something like that happening on her watch again, so she resigned.”

This is all my fault… Lily stares at her lap, her face awash with tears. “I’m sorry.” she says, pitifully.

“I know.” Vanessa says. She reaches out to pull Lily into a hug.

“What will happen to me now? Can I at least call Maisie to tell her I’m alright?” Lily wonders.

“No, Lily, you can’t. Not right now at least. Maybe once you’re feeling a little better we can do that. There’s some pretty alarming stuff in your file that we need to address first though. Right now you need to be focusing on yourself so that you can heal.”

Lily only sobs. Maisie has been the one person she’s been able to count on through everything, and now even that anchor is gone. “I want Maisie!” Lily wails.

“I know you do, sweetie.” Vanessa says sadly. “But I can’t do anything about that right now. Once you’re feeling better, we can try to see if she’d like to come visit. But, even if we do get to that point, it won’t be you reaching out to her. Maisie’s pretty shaken up by everything and it’s for the best right now that you both focus on healing your own wounds.”

“But,” Lily begins. “I need her.”

“Once you can demonstrate that you’re capable of communicating your needs and allowing others to help you when needed, we can talk about that. Being a Little doesn’t mean you’re completely helpless, even though I know that isn’t the Classification that you wanted for yourself. Sometimes we just have to make the best of the hand we’re dealt.”

“I. Want. Maisie!” Lily wails, her voice going raw and gritty from the force of her shouting.

Vanessa just gives a sad shake of her head. “Lily, sweetheart…I’m sorry that this is the way you’re having to learn this lesson. Actions have consequences. Sometimes they’re big, and sometimes they’re small. They might not always be bad, but they not good all the time either. That’s why it’s so important to think before you do something, to tell people how you’re feeling before it gets to the point where you feel like you can’t take anymore.” Vanessa explains.

Lily isn’t even listening anymore. 

The thought of facing everything without Maisie to lean on is unbearable. She feels like she’s being crushed, like she’s been sucked into a black hole and no matter what she does or how she tries to fight it, everything just brings her closer to the inevitable.

And so, she gives up. 

Lily retreats into herself, overwhelmed and shattered by the news about Maisie, and unwilling to keep fighting a losing battle.

She says nothing in response to Vanessa’s words, is limp and pliant during her diaper change and goes about her day in an almost mechanical fashion.

There’s a meal that probably tastes good, if Lily could bring herself enough into the present to experience it.

Then some medication, which eases some of the numb emptiness that Lily feels, but not enough that she wants to face the world again.

And later, after she’s been bathed and dressed in her pajamas, she stares blankly though her small window and into the night sky.

She’d read in school that looking up at the stars was like looking into the past; they’re so far away that it takes the light from some of them millions of years to reach earth. Many of them have probably gone supernova or dimmed or collapsed, but she’ll be long gone before their light ever stops shining in the sky.

And that’s how Lily feels now, she realizes bitterly–like a leftover. A spent shell of her former self, dim and guttering, waiting for everyone else to realize that she has nothing left to give.

And the worst part of it all is that the entire situation is her own doing. If she’d just listened to what Alex or Maisie had tried to tell her, had taken the help when it was offered instead of being stubborn, maybe she wouldn’t be in this mess.

But now, it’s too late.

She’s past the point of no return. There’s no way to take back her choices, no way to go back and fix things.

There’s only the path ahead, on that leads inexorably and permanently to the thing she’s been trying to avoid this whole time:

The life of a Little.

Lily doesn’t bother to try stopping the tears this time.

She presses her face into her pillow, and cries herself to sleep. 

Fin

 
 

[herezulo]

Glad that you got around to finishing this, even with things being hectic. Not so glad for Lily, however.

[kerry]

I also am glad that you finished it, but I can't believe that this is the ending you wanted all along. So abrupt, so empty, so nihilistic...did you do this just to finish it? I apologize if it is indeed the way you always envisioned it ending; it's just that it is so tonally different, so stark, that it is rather jarring...

[kerry]

Hi, all,

Brutal_Ink has offered me the opportunity to craft an alternate ending to this story. (We'll let him determine if it can be canon, but it should at least be fun to write!)

I will try to have a new chapter out by the weekend.

✍️

[kerry]

On 2/1/2023 at 3:14 PM, kerry said:

I will try to have a new chapter out by the weekend.

Yeah, that's not gonna happen. ?

But don't worry (if anyone is): it will be coming soon.

[FloridaKid]

On 2/5/2023 at 5:51 PM, kerry said:

But don't worry (if anyone is): it will be coming soon

Glad you’re taking this on @kerry. I like the universe @Brutal_Ink created and I held onto hope for Lily all the way to the end. The incurable romantic in me would love to see her end up with Maisie…they seem to make each other very happy. That being said, I’m looking forward to your alternate ending for this tale.

@Brutal_Ink: I sincerely hope you are able to relax and refresh. I’d love to read more from your intriguing universe when you’re ready. As an aside, I love how you compare Lily’s journey to falling into a black hole. That should have tipped me off where you were headed. At various points in my life I’ve had the same feelings about my ABDL side…fear that I was spiraling toward something I wouldn’t be able to escape.

[kerry]

The ending I am working on will not be perfectly "happy," as that is probably impossible for Lily, but it will be far less dark. Sorry it's taking so much longer than I wanted; I'm dealing with a ton of personal matters...

[Princess_August]

5 hours ago, kerry said:

The ending I am working on will not be perfectly "happy," as that is probably impossible for Lily, but it will be far less dark. Sorry it's taking so much longer than I wanted; I'm dealing with a ton of personal matters...

Anything will be better than what we got for the offical ending. a better ending would have been that the story ended on the previous chapter and Lily died because atleast we would have had closure. the official ending essentially gives us zero closure and is a big middle finger to people like me who wanted her to have a happy ending. you are the real hero Kerry!

[Princess_August]

@Brutal_Ink I have re-read the ending several times and I see what you were going for. you wanted a stark contrast to the ending of A New Life which I can appreciate. the way you went about it thought could have done with more finality and closure. what I would have done is fast forward few months or so to when Lily has been classed as 'unadoptable' due to displaying extreme aggression towards anyone who tried to adopt her after she was in one of the foster homes then cut to her laying in bed at night with Cici rearing her ugly head one last time. she would ask Lily questions like 'How long must this go on? aren't you tired of all of this?' and eventually the conversation would take a dark turn with Cici saying how she could take all the pain away if Lily gives her control one final time. Lily would and it would end with the Cici controlled Lily fashioning a noose out of her bedsheets and hanging herself. If you want to do a dark ending you need to full send it.

Still I am happy we are going to get a slightly better ending in the future from Kerry and I am eager to see what you will create in the future one day weather its another story in this world with a persepctive that sits between New Life & Stellar Remnants or something entirely new in and of itself. Your faithful reader and pal - Augustine