Ever Had A Wonder If Moment?

[dlsafrica]

In January 2015, I was due to come back to my flat on the last Friday of the month. I had been recovering from a hip replacement operation and my best friend and I had long since planned an event for that Saturday. My mom tried to encourage me to stay with her for one more week. The subtext (unspoken) was that her husband had died and she didn't want to feel alone. Yes, sure, there was an element of caring about my health, but I could sense where the sentiment was coming from.

I thought of saying to her I would on one condition - that she diaper me for the week. But I also feared saying that almost because of the fact that she could have just decided that I could stay with her longer. Besides, I had arrangements with my best friend, and I was sure that I would have the strength to walk the 3.8 kilometers to her house.

Sometimes I wonder what might have happened if I had laid down the condition... but I guess I had also tried to tell her a week before that I'm a girl (I was going through a period of identifying transgender), and it had not gone down well. I had been threatened with being taken to a psychologist. So it might have been best that I didn't.

[Elfy]

So your grieving mother asked you to stay with her a bit longer after her husband had died and you thought you could leverage the situation to fulfil your fetish?

That's emotional blackmail and although you didn't actually ask I think you need to seriously reevaluate things. That's leaving aside the weird desire to get your mother to diaper you in the first place.

[carsfan]

WTF! Why? I think this isn’t someone acting out a fantasy, sadly 

[willnotwill]

"A week before I was a girl."   

A TG friend of mine and I referred to this as him being in Middlesex.

 

[dlsafrica]

6 hours ago, Elfy said:

So your grieving mother asked you to stay with her a bit longer after her husband had died and you thought you could leverage the situation to fulfil your fetish?

That's emotional blackmail and although you didn't actually ask I think you need to seriously reevaluate things. That's leaving aside the weird desire to get your mother to diaper you in the first place.

Oh my gosh!! Why is it that people so often misunderstand me, and not just on this site? I don't make an effort to go into in depth explanations but you also are looking at it very one sidedly. You are making the plain assumption based on not knowing my mom's personality, or my previous circumstances. That is in my opinion, judgmental. For the sake of clarification, let me explain (and noone else would provide this much detail so consider yourself priviledged. 

I have internal bleeding as a blood disorder since birth. I had a motot car accident when I was 8 which left me unconscious for eleven weeks, bearly hanging on to life. I was paralysed on one side, couldn't talk, and couldn't do anything. I had years of occupational and physical therapy to get me functioning in a normal way again, ranging from walking to writing etc. I had severe cerebral palsy. So my mom was naturally protective of me anyway. 

Fast forward 26 years. My dad died. FIVE YEARS LATER I had the operation, but still my mom couldn't adjust, even though she had seven dogs.

You know, if one were to step back from the situation a little and look at it in terms of thinking "what if this person is being genuine and has real feelings about the situation", one could possibly be less judgmental. It was a half second thought that came into my mind once, which I happened to share here.

OF ALL POSSIBLE PLACES TO SHARE THIS KIND OF THING, I THOUGHT THIS SITE AND FORUM WOULD BE A SAFE PLACE. But I open up and get literally jumped at. 

Thanks a lot.

44 minutes ago, willnotwill said:

"A week before I was a girl."   

A TG friend of mine and I referred to this as him being in Middlesex.

 

Thank you for being the one comment here that isn't judgmental.  -- I know. It was a weird time for me. In fact it's been a weird life. But it's also the only life I have. I felt this thing way back. I can trace it back to 1984 when I was kissing boys, or more specifically to 1985 when I heard Boom Boom Room's "Here Comes The Man" on a TV ad here. It wouldn't go away. Then I got involved in the only relationship I have ever had when I was nearly 33, and I got abused in every way imaginale. And that tied in with the time when the government here instituted an annual 16 Days of Activism Against Women and Child Abuse event. So I thought the law was on her side. The police didn't come when I reported it. So they were on her side. My dad said to her (jokingly) a few months later to beat me up a little bit. So my parents were on her side. I was defenseless. Maybe imagining a female persona  was a natural defense. But I also don't recognise gender differences. And to be clear (because there seems to be a tendency to jump down my throat withoutn asking for clarification on what I mean... there is a difference between gender and sex. Sex is a gentically assigned set of physical features which society sets standards for. Gender is the way one relates to the world.

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

No. By the time I was 21, I had driven myself crazy with those and the infinite ramifications that they generate like so many echoes in a sound chamber. 99% of which have "no way" engraved in them. I do not waste my time pursuing undomesticated aquatic fowl when there are things that I can make become real when I stop wasting time, effort and tears on the unattainable: Life is short and you only live once and you do not get a do-over. So make it count

[Mr. Sea Otter]

17 hours ago, dlsafrica said:

Oh my gosh!! Why is it that people so often misunderstand me, and not just on this site?

Please consider this a helpful suggestion.  If you find that you are regularly misunderstood, there may be some part of it that is on you.  If you don't provide sufficient background, it is hard to fill in the blanks without knowing you.

When I read your post, what I saw was a 40 something year old man contemplating having his mother diaper him for a week. For me, I can't imagine ever wanting to ask my mother to do something like that at that age. It seemed fake or worse.  Having read your follow up post, I guess it makes a bit more sense, but it is a struggle for me to understand why any adult would want their mom to diaper them for a week. When you just throw something like that out there, without any context, I don't think it is surprising for folks to respond somewhat negatively.

I do agree with you that people on this site can be a bit judgemental. But you should know that is partly because we are protective of this community. At times people post 'true stories' that are obviously false. The dating / meet people sections are rife with scammers. I believe some people on here struggle to distinguish between fact and fantasy, and there are a number of people with mental health issues. And every now and then we get a straight up troll.

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

Not to mention that it has an 85% chance of creeping her out

[Elfy]

I'm sure if you read your post with a neutral eye you'll see why the idea that the death was a recent thing came from.

However, none of what you said explains why you'd ask your mother to diaper you. Regardless of how soon after a death it was, if she wanted you to stay and you suggest she diaper you in exchange it is both strange and a type of emotional blackmail. You seemed to suggest that she was still not over the loss so probably wanted to spend some time with her son. To contemplate taking advantage of that for your thrills is not a good thing.

To your credit you didn't actually ask in the end so that's something though I'm not sure I'd admit to any of these thoughts in a forum post!

[rusty pins]

Yes.  take what Mr Sea Otter and Elfy to heart.  Mr Sea Otter wouldn't have 4 likes on his post if others didn't agree it makes sense.  When I type something I proof read it, then I re read it and make changes sometimes several time before I post it.  I look at my first message as a draft, something I'm just typing to get the basics down.  Then when I Proof read it I start making changes,  Adding information here and there, deleting other sentences.  Once I do that, I read it over again and make a few more subtle changes here and there before I post it.  Often times when doing the draft, I know what I mean to say but when reading it over, I see where things I myself know are not clearly stated for others.  That's where I have to add some clarification and changes.

[Icewolf]

I'm going to interject into this and say while yes detail does help. There are things that people try to avoid as it leads to questions individuals might not to divulge. If your first thought is it being blackmail maybe, just maybe you should step back and check yourself before pushing that theory onto others. The way it was worded does lead to questions however, after I read the post that was not the first thought I had.