Honesty And Treating People With Respect

[BabyChris121675]

Ok, I have a bee up my diaper over this, and I have to get this off my chest. I've been thinking about this for some time, a few years, actually...

Why the hell do we ABs keep hurting each other, backstabbing ecah other, and stuff like that? Can't we all get along with each other, put aside the fighitng, the bickering, the stealing of babies, the lying, the misleading of people who are not honest in the community.

I think it's time that a lot of people, mostly men, stop thinking with their dicks, and start thinking with their consciences and brains. Too many people get hurt in this commmunity and we need to start paying it forward, stop hurting each other, and start treating people as we want to be treated. I've never hurt people in the community, if I have, well, I sometimes say things I don't mean and shit like that. But that's due to the fact I have a habit of taking things literally sometimes due to my Asperger's, but damnit. I am honest with who I am, and I don't lie, or mislead.

Why do people hurt each other in this community? Can't people think with their brains and not thier dicks? I mean, GOD, why do people have to hurt each other, drive good people away from the community? It does not make a lot of sense to me at all. I have not been hurt lately, but I have been thinking about this a lot lately. I've been thinking about why the community is as splintered as it is, why people can't get along, and all the mistrust between straights, gays etc, and babies and parents.

It's time that the AB community unified in a way, said, hey, let's just work together, and not hang separately. We need to learn as a community that everyone is different, and that we all need to learn to do is think, before we say something, let's think about it, think about how the other person might take it or if they might get hurt in the heat of the moment.

I think it's time to pay it forward, be better to people, and not hurt people, be honest with who people are. I just have been thinking about this, cause I've run into some people in the past seven years, that sometimes I think it's time to give up hope in the AB community, but I won't, cause I know there has to be something out there for me in the community, whether it be a mommy or a baby girl.

BabyChris121675

[beallucanb]

Hang in there chris, everybody in the AB community isn't a jerk, to put it mildly. You maybe have run across your share of the jerks, but I am sure there are more good AB's than bad, It's true most of the jerks, think with there dick, but they are some of us that are just interested in haveing a good time while diapered.

I hope you find what, and who you are looking for, soon....B

[Necros]

Well you have a good point, some people are just plain jerks ... but as mentioned to me by someone else on another thread making generalizations isn't right. Not all of them are jerks lol, some people are genuine good people that love to help others.

One more thing, if you meet people on the internet and choose to believe who they say they are then YOU are at fault. Its still not nice from the other person to lie but you still were the one who was innocent enough to believe him. My advice to you is to be friendly to everyone you meet on the internet but ALWAYS expect their lying about their stories or life. That way, you will never get hurt ... one more thing, if one person says something, ask proof before blindly believing in them. I don't sympathize for people who believe everyone on the internet, but i do support your message of love and peace and respect! Its very nice of you to bring it up but you all should wise up and understand that the internet is the perfect medium for liars and it will always be. Until you all figure this out, guess what will happen? More drama like this on nice boards like these. It really ruins the mood wouldn't you say.

Just my two cents. Their harsh but their real has a stone falling on your head is!

Peace, love, respect~

Necros~

[Red Barchetta]

Unfortunately, this is a problem in any community.

I still believe that most people are basically good, but the few that are complete jerks are the ones that get noticed more.

It's a real problem, the best you can do is basically assume everyone is a lier until it is somehow proved that they are telling the truth (ie Guilty till proven Innocent). It's not really fair at all, but, for now anyway - the only way to truly avoid most of what you are talking about...

[Incomplete Dude]

To argue, back-stab and inflict pain is to be human. At the same time, so is to reconcile, protect and heal. It just depends on the company you keep, but even then there are no guarantees. To ask people to stop doing either of these things, is to ask them to become something other then human, a feat currently impossible. The best we can do is deal with the situations as they arise. Make the best of the good, and minimize the bad, but we can never eliminate either.

[DIAPERPHANTOM]

I generally feel the same way as you BabyChris121675. Since I've just returned, I don't want to go into detail on why I left, but some of the reasons you have clearly stated in your post hit the mark. I will say that I had to put things into perspective concerning my lifestyle and this site. Though I have come to the conclusion that I will never be able to get everything I want from this site, it does offer me much more than I could get anywhere else.

I strongly believe you will get out what you put in. Unfortunately, just because you're nice, doesn't mean you're not a perv, and that's the reality of the internet. We all have our own motives for being here. You can only try to make it work and have faith that it is working...

[BabyChris121675]

I've been thinking about this for a while, thats why I decided to write what I did, it's been on my mind for a few years, and well, I figured it was time to finally write it out.

I've had this on my mind since I initially got hurt back in 2004 by someone, and well, I've often wondered why the community, which includes everyone from gays, to sissies, to straight couples that it can't get along that good. I think it's time we all got along, and well, I figure it's time to say something about it. Ya know?

I was always raised to be respectful to people, treat people as I wish to be treated, and well, I sometimes wish others were and had that code too. But, not everyone else does.

I wrote what I wrote, cause it's been on my mind for a few years.

BabyChris121675

[Chibiusa255]

I think that the community, as a whole, is fairly supportive and is made up of mostly good people. There are some who are not, sure. But, that will be true for any community. There are some perverts and drama wil break out once in a while, but overall we get along pretty well. My experience here has been very good and I've made some very dear friends.

I know that if you meet me online or you meet me on the street you'll be talking to the same person but you can't expect everyone to be like that. If you automatically assume that everyone online is sincere then your setting yourself to be hurt.

[thickones1]

Sad tp hear that you have run into problems in this community. I have heard this from another person as well, so your not alone. Do you think this behaviour is limited to this community or is it human nature and can be found outside of this community? I guess it only takes one bad apple to make things stink which is too bad but the old saying goes "stung once twice shy". If everyone respects each other than there should be no problems, but is that only a dream. Hope you find better experiences from here on in.

[Morv]

Not everyone is the same.

Not everyone replies with the same sobriety.

Not everyone replies with the same intelligence.

Not everyone sees the same images in the shadows.

The raven speaks differently to us all.

Though I love all, not all love the same.

[thekid1]

Not everyone is the same.

Not everyone replies with the same sobriety.

Not everyone replies with the same intelligence.

Not everyone sees the same images in the shadows.

The raven speaks differently to us all.

Though I love all, not all love the same.

good way to look at life morv. like they say no one is created equal every one is different in some way or another

[BabyChris121675]

I haven't been hurt lately myself, but I was thinking about it a lot these days. It's only that I decided write it out after doing some serious thinking the night I wrote it. I get to thinking alot, and sometimes I tend to analyize things too much as this.

I had run into an old AB friend of mine online, and she'd gotten hurt by someone again, so that was why I wrote what I did.

I guess when my friends get hurt, I get hurt, ya know, cause I have feelings for my friends, and I was thinking about my friend.

BabyChris121675

[Rosho]

Ya some people are jerks, and those people are always going to be around...sadly...you only thing you can do is be honest and hope that it rubs off onto others to prevent the speard of these things...in the events of stealing babies and backstabbing I'm not really sure of because I'm not huge in that scene but again like you said, respect. I'll all for it!

[AutieAB]

Ok, I have a bee up my diaper over this, and I have to get this off my chest. I've been thinking about this for some time, a few years, actually...

Why the hell do we ABs keep hurting each other, backstabbing ecah other, and stuff like that? Can't we all get along with each other, put aside the fighitng, the bickering, the stealing of babies, the lying, the misleading of people who are not honest in the community.

[waves at fellow Aspie baby ]

Yeah, this whole thing bugs me too. I mean, DD is by far and away the most united forum out there for us by a very long way but there are still a few problems. TBH, it disappoints me when I see fights and arguments breaking out here but quite often, people make up within just a few days so perhaps its not all that bad. I tend to just try to stay out of those situations until they blow over (although I have a tendency to blunder in without noticing but I guess you know all about that )

AutieAB

[Dill_Pickle]

[waves at fellow Aspie baby ]

Yeah, this whole thing bugs me too. I mean, DD is by far and away the most united forum out there for us by a very long way but there are still a few problems. TBH, it disappoints me when I see fights and arguments breaking out here but quite often, people make up within just a few days so perhaps its not all that bad. I tend to just try to stay out of those situations until they blow over (although I have a tendency to blunder in without noticing but I guess you know all about that )

AutieAB

Umm, it is a theorem of the internet that you never really know who you are talking to. Never forget it -- it's the tool the cops use to make examples of pedophiles, who think they are going to meet children...and find handcuffs instead.

All you have from the net are so many words....when you get emotionally involved with someone, its time to start cross-checking some of those words you have accumulated from that someone against other types of reality. My shrink recently told me that lots of kids feel like they have to inflate themselves on their myspace and/or facebook pages. Even if someone is trying to be honest, what you get is still only a very small projection of the person you are talking to.

So take care....

[Morv]

Inflate? INFLATE? My penis really is naturally 22.7 inches long, flacid. Inflate is for... plastic pretend girlfriends? Nobody lies on the internet, the internet just causes misconceptions... like alcohol.... "Officer, how was I to know she was sixteen? She was sitting next to me for three hours AT THE BAR!"

Ok, sorry for being so serious.

[Necros]

Internet, SERIOUS BUSINESS!

NEcros~

[soggy]

[waves at fellow Aspie baby ]

Yeah, this whole thing bugs me too. I mean, DD is by far and away the most united forum out there for us by a very long way but there are still a few problems. TBH, it disappoints me when I see fights and arguments breaking out here but quite often, people make up within just a few days so perhaps its not all that bad. I tend to just try to stay out of those situations until they blow over (although I have a tendency to blunder in without noticing but I guess you know all about that )

AutieAB

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FOOD FOR THOUGHT:

When most ppl are on their computer, they don't always consider that they are speaking with someone else when they say things. Sometimes they don't realize that they are speaking to a person, and not to their computer. When I got my first computer years ago, I remember that I had sent an email to my internet friend while I was angry at him about something. I sent the email, and later on felt badly about it. I wasn't really mad at him. I was just mad. I had no way to retract the email either. Once the words were put to screen, it was too late to take them back. I did not lose the friend, but I did learn a valuable lesson from it. THINK before I type, and make sure that I say

what I mean, and mean what I say. If ppl were speaking face to face, their choice of words would be different.

Wow, I'm glad I got that off my chest!

soggy

[DollyDiaper]

D lly

[Red Barchetta]

[Necros]

D lly

I lol'd so hard my parents told me to keep the noise down lol xD

Necros~

[turtlepins]

Don't look for the example–be the example.

Don't look for honesty in others–be honest.

Don't look for love from others–be loving.

Don't look for literacy in others–it no longer exists!

Don't look for kindness from others–be kind.

"Do not be deceived, for God is not mocked. Whatsoever a man sows, that shall he reep!"

"Bad company corrupts good character."

I love this community, and like all communities, it will have its share of preditors, selfish, mean, and dishonest people. Most of us, thankfully, set the example, are honest, loving, and kind. As for the literacy thing . . . let's not go there!

Turtlepins! huggles 'n snuggles 'n giggles!

[dpr13ca]

Dolly that's absolutely right ,we just need to be who we really are.

Hopefully one day it may happen

[DollyDiaper]

Dolly that's absolutely right ,we just need to be who we really are.

Hopefully one day it may happen

How true dpr!

D lly

[Chibiusa255]

Don't look for the example–be the example.

Don't look for honesty in others–be honest.

Don't look for love from others–be loving.

Don't look for literacy in others–it no longer exists!

Don't look for kindness from others–be kind.

Signed. This should be a motto for us all.

One thing I think is that who we are and who we think we are and not exactly the same person. If you get to know someone IRL you'll see pretty much how they are but, on the internets people kinda project an idealized image of themselves. In most cases this is not such a great exaggeration, but it's still not 100% accurate. I like to think i know myself pretty well and I'm pretty much the same online as i am off but a lot of people, for whatever reasons, adopt a much different personality online. Sometimes their intent is malicious.

The anonymous nature of the interwebs also frees people to whatever they want. This is not always a bad thing but it also causes a lot of people to act without thinking of the consequences of their actions. There is a certain detachment when talking to people online and some people seem to forget that there is an actual person on the other end that may be hurt by what they say or do.

Treat people with kindness and respect. Give people the benefit of a doubt. But, also keep in mind that, to a certain extent, we're all playing a sort of character when we get online.