Cya Posted June 3, 2017 Share Posted June 3, 2017 My first commissioned story and it's Link to comment
Cya Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 --------A Few Hours Later, On Board The Bebop------- Jet carried the unconscious Faye over his shoulder as he entered the living room of the Bebop. The sudden entrance of Jet caused Ed to look up from her computer. "Jet person!" Ed called out as she hopped up and ran over to him. "Is Faye-Faye okay?!" "She's lucky she told you where she was or-." Jet stopped mid sentence as he gently lowered the purple haired woman onto the yellow couch. He looked down at Ed and cleared his throat. "She's going to be alright, but you should keep an eye on her while me and Spike get this guy who did this to her, okay?" "Absolutely!" Ed declared as she gave a full blown military salute to Jet. "At ease." Jet said as he turned to leave. "I have classified information!" Ed declared Link to comment
CDfm Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 That was interesting. I would really like some more explanation of what is going on. Like what is it they are attempting to accomplish and what kind of ship are they on. I know she has kind of been turned into a monkey but how and why? Link to comment
Cya Posted June 5, 2017 Author Share Posted June 5, 2017 2 hours ago, CDfm said: That was interesting. I would really like some more explanation of what is going on. Like what is it they are attempting to accomplish and what kind of ship are they on. I know she has kind of been turned into a monkey but how and why? The person who commissioned this only wanted me to focus on Faye. Sadly, this basically made fleshing out the story all, but impossible. I wanted there to be a whole section dedicated to explaining the Jester's motives and even a back story about him. Regardless of the commissioner's Link to comment
CDfm Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 Wow that was very informative, thank you very much. I know you didn't need to go to all that extra effort and I truly do appreciate it. 1 Link to comment
Cya Posted June 7, 2017 Author Share Posted June 7, 2017 --------On The Other Side Of The City------- Spike ran at full speed through filthy alleyways and side roads as he closed the gap. Aspault paved alleys turned to cement covered parking lots. Spike lunges and tackled the bounty in a deserted industrial zone.The blue suited bounty hunter had cornered the Jester, but the criminal kicked at Spike and broke free from the scuffle. However, Spike raised his pistol. "It's over. Stop you clown!" The madman stopped running and stood still. Spike took a few steps towards the bounty while his gun was drawn. The grey haired man quickly turned around and flung a handful of "pocket sand" into Spike's eyes. "Fuck!" Spiked yelled out while his hands instinctively went to his face. Link to comment
Cya Posted June 8, 2017 Author Share Posted June 8, 2017 --------A Few Miles From The Bebeop------- Link to comment
Cya Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 --------Twenty Minutes Later At The Zoo------- "Ooh ooh, ooh, aah, aah aah!!" The diaper clad woman called out as she scratches her back. A few cameras clicked off, capturing the image for the newspaper while a reporter stood by, waiting to go on the air again. The Zookeepers were going to wait until after the last reporter made their commentary to tranquilize Faye. This may have been highly unorthodox, but this event was sure to draw a lot of attention to the Zoo and that could only mean a lot more Woolongs in the future. Someone in the crowd threw a banana into the cage and Faye dropped down from her tree. She picked it up and peeled back the outer layer as she happily hooted. The purple haired woman eat the banana in a few quick bites before jumping up and down which forced her full diaper to bounce as well as her breasts. The crowd laughed in response while the cell phones clicked more pictures. Faye climbed back up her tree and started to swing around some more. Jet surveyed the situation from behind the crowd and knew that there was only one way to get Faye. "Hey you!" The lead Zookeeper walked over to Jet."Yeah, what do you want?" "This is going to sound pretty awkward, but that's my friend up there in that tree." "What the hell is she doing swinging around naked in our Monkey Cage?" Link to comment
CDfm Posted June 12, 2017 Share Posted June 12, 2017 Good updates. Waking up like that sure had to be a shock. Now to get her safely out of the monkey pen and away from the press and they can concentrate on the Jester again. Iam looking forward to reading more. Link to comment
Cya Posted June 14, 2017 Author Share Posted June 14, 2017 --------One Hour Later, Aboard The Bebop------- Faye took a deep breath before stepping out of her bathroom. The events that had transpired over the previous night were entirely a blur to her. However, the shame and humiliation felt as fresh to her as the clothes she just put on. 'How the hell did I even end up in that Monkey Cage?' She couldn't remember anything after inhaling the chemical, but everything since receiving the antidote was crystal clear. 1 Link to comment
CDfm Posted June 16, 2017 Share Posted June 16, 2017 I am sure that there were plenty of others who were keeping up with the story. I may have been the only one providing comments but I am sure others were enjoying it as well. I actually liked the story. I would love to see more of it. But at the same time I understand you are putting in the effort to write and don't feel as though your work is getting enough recognition. That's one reason I actually try and comment on every new chapter. You are working hard and should be recognized for your efforts. Link to comment
ELLIE52 Posted June 29, 2017 Share Posted June 29, 2017 To be quite honest, I tried reading this story earlier, didn't quite follow, and said I'd come back to it. Link to comment
Cya Posted June 29, 2017 Author Share Posted June 29, 2017 12 hours ago, ELLIE52 said: To be quite honest, I tried reading this story earlier, didn't quite follow, and said I'd come back to it. Link to comment
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