am I getting drunk too much?

[tyrantblade3500]

I usually get drunk once a week, but this week im already drunk for the 2nd time and im just wondering if the tradeoff of feeling awesome now but perhaps feeling miserable later will be worth it, so far I think it will be, but I guess ill know for sure later on, I know it may completely nullify my medication, but this is the happiest I can get it seems and I have no intent to self harm or kill myself, im just trying to squeeze happiness out of this miserable life, ive been just satisfied enough to try to keep myself in check and not do anything stupid for so long, except for the crushing anxiety as of lately making me actually think of cutting, which is the worst ive probably ever felt.

[WakkoWannaBe]

Well. I'm not a professional, but a little red flag is going up in my mind saying that "using alcohol to make you feel better about yourself is a sign of alcoholism." Do some research on that. Personally, I never think that getting sick the day after is worth being drunk.

[Bettypooh]

[Dill_Pickle]

ditto, Miss Betty, ditto.

[kevindhca]

Cutting? Why would you want to do that? The alcohol isn't causing damage fast enough.

Getting drunk is a sign of an alcohol problem. Can you have ONE drink and then no more, leaving the rest in the bottle.

If so, then you are not an alcoholic, but need to get out and enjoy some activities you find interesting.

Maybe replace that drinking with a weekly activity that contributes to your health rather than takes away from it.

I do have experience, my brother is an alcoholic, he spent over $30,000 on alcohol last year.

[Baby Brian]

Ditto the ditto, ditto. You are ABSOLUTELY drinking more than you can handle.

[tyrantblade3500]

Im far from not having seen a therapist or psychiatrist (though its been a while since ive had a therapist) and I should mention while I can have bad thoughts its rarely when im drunk and I don't get drunk way beyond what's reasonable, when I get drunk I remember everything and have yet to do anything I have regretted later. I really don't see getting drunk as a problem besides the potential for it to ruin my mood stability later on (which im not dead set at avoiding as long as I hide it well and dont do anything stupid). ive cut myself for many reasons in the past but not in a while, lately it comes to mind only when my anxiety gets extreme.

[Bettypooh]

I to ruin my mood stability later on (which im not dead set at avoiding as long as I hide it well....)

And there you go- that hidiing of your mood indicates that a problem exists even if alcohol has nothing to do with it Not bashing, just trying to help. Back inb my drinking days I did it for the pleasure of taste, the socializing, and yes for the buzz too I had allowed it to become a problem in my life so I slowed waaaaay down, having 2-3 drinks a month on average and all was going well. Then I gut drunk (in a safe environment) twice thinking I was having fun. It felt good, I enjoyed it, there were no problems but when I asked myself why I'd done it I couldn't find the answer. It wasn't long before I was on the verge of suicide, then at the Therapists to get help. It was there that the reason for those episodes emerged: I was drinking to escape from reality and some problems I had created for myslef. No matter how well I handled it, that was what drove me to it and with alcohol being a depressant that was all it took to overload me beyond what I could handle

[tyrantblade3500]

Why do I drink? Why does anybody really, usually to celebrate the work week being done, and help relax when work gets really stressing, naturally when I was working 60-68 hour weeks (in 6 days tops, but usually closer to 60 hours in 5 days) I was way more stressed and drank more every week (it varied depending on how drunk I felt like getting which depended on my mood and stress level), but to put it into a number form it was from around 4-12 ounces (only twice at or above the higher number) of 35-40% alcohol once I knew I wasn't gonna be working the next morning. Yeah maybe its not the best idea to have an attitude of not really caring about anything and drinking heavily, but it wouldn't be my first bad idea (not that alcohol usually influences me to act like that more as I handle my liquor well and usually I can be heavily drunk and walk like I haven't had a sip). Im trying to be more positive and reach out if I feel like im really slipping (online of course, I don't want to get my family concerned over any of my moments of weakness)

[Bettypooh]

Is drinking your only method of unwinding? If so then find others I used to take a long hot bath after work which did wonders for the physical body and that lowered my felt stress considerably- thus there was less desire to drink even though I still would- just not as much. I thought it over and decided that I really didn't need the socializing of the bars anymore so that became less often a happening too. I replaced that with going shopping more often to see what was out there instead of just to buy something and I got involved with my other hobbies too. A life built around drinking can be a problem- you should be able to have a life without any one thing which is in your's now. If you can't then you've got a problem

[tyrantblade3500]

No its not my only method of unwinding, it just seems to be the most enjoyable and overlaps with other things.