Feelling Little

[hkc123]

Hello all,

You guys have always been great at giving me advice so I thought I'd come back for more. I am the mommy of an adorable bABy boy. He has a real night time incontinence problem, and we have spent our relationship trying to make playtime as real as possible. That means not doing things that others on here may do to fill the role. Everything we do is real and in some way logical. I make him feel little in many ways, some of which include embarassing him by talking about his bed wetting, taking him to buy diapers, talking to him about things that are somewhat adult like but get him feeling more kid like (i.e. baseball and trains), not letting him do much if anything for himself when he comes over.

Here's my issue, my bABy and I don't get to see each other as often as we used to. Because of that, its even more important that every interaction we have we are filling our roles, really internalizing mommydom if you will. Since I've only been a mommy for about a year or so, its sometimes hard for me to completely internalize. Its something I really want, but haven't been able to do completely. I'm looking for some more ways to make my bABy feel little through text, e-mail, phone chats, etc, so we can make the most of the little time we do get face to face. Any thoughts on how I can make him feel little all the time. He's feeling pretty disheartened and I'm looking for some "grand gestures" to make things rights.

Thanks!

[beallucanb]

I would text him asking him did he brush his teeth, or wash behind his ears, or comb his hair etc.

I would constantly bother him making sure he does all the things kids won't do on there ow without be told.

Keep reminding him of things he should be doing to the point of being annoying , like all mothers do.

[diaperbrownie]

Require him to put you on speakerphone when you call, so that when you call and he is hanging with the guys, he has to put you on speakerphone and you say something like "did baby make wettums in his didy??" while all his friends listen.

That'll make him feel small!

[sarah_ab]

bouncing off Bellallucanbe's post... also things like calling him and reading hima story at nighttime for bed

when he's alone, ahve him send you text pics of him in his diapie, or of him with his bib on while eating dinner...

have him check in with you when he wakes up, when he leaves ro work, when he gets there.

make him ask youpermission for anything thatwould be a 'treat' ... to stay up late, to watch tv, to have dessert or a soda, to go to the toy store...

make sure he calls you every night to check in and tell you about his day....

each time he doesn't call you etc.... put a mark on a list.... then when you are together, thats how many spankings, or how much earlier his bed time is etc....

also, if you know you are only together say every two weeks, write up two weeks worth of 'notes from mommy' and put each one in an envelop with a date on it, and make him put it in his briefcase etc.... to read at lunch time each day..... these notes can say anything taht would make him feel momentarily little "what a good little boy you are "mommy loves his little boy" etc....

if he has a webcam, and laptop, make him have it on while he takes a bath and has u on speaker phone so you can instruct him how to bath himself.... also diapering, and dressing for bed can all be done w/ the webcam and speaker phone or mic on computer....

[hkc123]

I would text him asking him did he brush his teeth, or wash behind his ears, or comb his hair etc.

I would constantly bother him making sure he does all the things kids won't do on there ow without be told.

Keep reminding him of things he should be doing to the point of being annoying , like all mothers do.

Although he likes the threat of embarassment, the last thing he would ever want is for his friends to find out. Thanks for the thought though.

[hkc123]

bouncing off Bellallucanbe's post... also things like calling him and reading hima story at nighttime for bed

when he's alone, ahve him send you text pics of him in his diapie, or of him with his bib on while eating dinner...

have him check in with you when he wakes up, when he leaves ro work, when he gets there.

make him ask youpermission for anything thatwould be a 'treat' ... to stay up late, to watch tv, to have dessert or a soda, to go to the toy store...

make sure he calls you every night to check in and tell you about his day....

each time he doesn't call you etc.... put a mark on a list.... then when you are together, thats how many spankings, or how much earlier his bed time is etc....

also, if you know you are only together say every two weeks, write up two weeks worth of 'notes from mommy' and put each one in an envelop with a date on it, and make him put it in his briefcase etc.... to read at lunch time each day..... these notes can say anything taht would make him feel momentarily little "what a good little boy you are "mommy loves his little boy" etc....

if he has a webcam, and laptop, make him have it on while he takes a bath and has u on speaker phone so you can instruct him how to bath himself.... also diapering, and dressing for bed can all be done w/ the webcam and speaker phone or mic on computer....

Those are really great ideas, thanks! I have him call me every night and every morning to check his diaper, but never thought to photo or video it.

[:dlb]

I for one enjoy being called sweetie or honey. Even when person doesnt know i'm ab.

[curiositykilledthecat]

I know how he feels, I would pissed off at daddy right now if I didn't know the reason for our lack of time together was work related. Little things like chatting on an im and talking to him like a small child helps.

[hkc123]

I know how he feels, I would pissed off at daddy right now if I didn't know the reason for our lack of time together was work related. Little things like chatting on an im and talking to him like a small child helps.

I understand his feeling, I just feel like I need a grander gesture that will let him know I'm always there if he needs, he's always my little guy, and the like. Its hard to text him during the day, cause other people might see, and its not what he wants. Lately its felt harder to get into my mommy-space, with the lack of physical contact. I really need to step up my game, but I'm struggling. I'm not a very dominant and aggressive person so my mommy-space is something I ease into when we're together, but now I need to find ways to be in mommy-space the second we interact.

[sarah_ab]

i'm not sure if you fly to see each other, or what... but if you pick him up at the airport, or train station etc...

open the back door of the car, make him sit there and buckle his seat belt for him. give him a juice box or sippy cup. Buy a kids cd of music and put that on. so from the very start he is little.

If he comes to your house, or you to his, when you hug him, pat his bottom, no diaper on, Immediate spanking and then corner time. If diaper on, a BIG kiss and some front rubbing for being such a good boy.

Also, with the spanking, strip him down to just his tee shirt as he stands in the corner, or if he's diapered, again down to just a tee shirt... have a pacifier in your pocket and after your kiss, immediately pop that into his mouth.

Also, after his hug, diaper or not, smack the back of his thighs and push him down, because babies don't walk, they only crawl.

will write more, when not falling asleep!

[Little Matt]

Maybe you can go shopping for him while your not with him. But him some little toys, diapers, juice boxes, or whatever else. That gives you some time to play the mommy role while he's around. You could read parenting magazines or websites. Stuff moms do that doesn't directly involve their kids. That might help you feel in the role more consistently without risking anybody finding out.

You two sound like you really care for each other. It's good to see you trying to make it work.

[Guest Amphetamenace]

Check his dydee when you're in public together, or a semi-public place, just peel back the waistband of his pants and a little glimpse will do. Just enough to make him blush. Like in a movie theater, standing in line at a restaraunt, etc. Then pat his bottom and ask him, "Hows your dydee comin along?"

Back seat car diaperings/changes are always fun, just pick a rather private place.

Incorporate a baby "routine"; its a really good way to make him feel taken care of and like him being a baby is just a normal part of the day. Wake-up and change at a certain hour, then breakfast, then buh-byes, bottle time, then cuddle time, then play time, another change, another bottle, etc.

At a restaraunt, bring a nice bottle of his favorite drink and keep it in his sight. Wait until he can't stand the temptation and eventually reaches for it.

Bring an empty bottle everywhere, and when you stop at starbucks, or a favorite drink stop, swap the container it comes in and have him drink it out of Mommy's bottle instead.

[diaperbrownie]

When in public places, like lines, put your hand down the back of his pants and feel his diaper for wetness. If it's wet say out loud "baby's wet!". If it's dry, tell him "you aren't wet, baby. Whatsa matter?"

Whenever in public, always take the chance to say anything involving him in diapers. If at the store, tell him "honey we have to go buy you some more baby diapers" or "let's go to the bathroom and change your didy".

Use public restrooms for changings. ALways force him to go into the women's room with you, holding his hand while he sucks his thumb. When done changing, force him to carry the wet or dirty diaper to the trash bin and throw it away, even if other women are watching.

[BriGuy]

Yeah that taking a man into a women's restroom will probably go over like a lead balloon. Not a very wise idea.

Definitely the random diaper checks, my mommy does this discretely and it makes me feel very little

[PIzzazz]

If he's not diapered all the time, you could have him text you every time he has to go potty and when he's done. And you can always text him to remind him to wash his hands.

[hkc123]

These have all been great suggestions. I guess I'm more curious how I can make him feel little when we are apart. We already do our thing when we're together, but helping him make it through the times when we can't physically be together is the hard part.