Dealing With Severely, Mentally Ill Members

[diamondback6881]

My husband who has dyslexia doesn't spell very well and he used to post here and some people here gave him a hard time about his spelling and then he quit forums cold turkey because of his spelling. He didn't like people pointing out his errors and it always embarrassed him he make these mistakes. So forums aren't meant for him. Forums aren't meant for everyone like I've said.

If I was one of the members who gave him a hard time, I would like to apologize.

Whatever happened to 'teaching a man to fish'?

How does the saying go? 'Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime'?

ps, @babytbone - Don't fuck with The Sarah, please. If you have a problem with bigboy words, don't get on the internet. And if you love your God that much, you probably shouldn't be here, either. :obligatorysmileyface:

Yea dude, stay off the net if you can't handle cussing.

[curiositykilledthecat]

I can relate with people who have mental problems become a gigantic burden because all they ever talk about 24 hours a day is their problems. You can be pouring blood out of your ass and yet somehow the conversation will end up being about their mental disorder. People need to be encouraged from time to time and I'm cool with that, or like under Scoop the Poop we had a thread about depression so the conversation was about well duh depression. The problem arises with people being fixated and self centered about their own issues to the point they alienate everyone around them.

[aleyxsis]

There are people on this board who are fixated on one thing .They post the same poopy crap all the time and thus alienate everyone here .But they just don't get it !.I know a dude like that from where i worked every conversation leads back to his x and they have been divorced for 10 yrs .I see him comming i walk the other way and avoid at all cost.The sad thing is this guy is mentally disabled it has been proven and everybody at work knew it xcept for him !! very sad

[Guest NaughtyAshes]

this thread needs some lolcats....

[Nat]

I think people have the wrong conception about diaper forums. They think they can come on here and talk about diapers only and post about their diaper lives and brag about it. It's not like that on any forums. You go to a wrestling forum and you see other topics that isn't about wrestling. You go to a Lion King fan board and you see other topics that isn't about the movie. You go to a mental illness forum and you do see other topics that isn't about that mental illness. And there are diaper buddies here who think just because you're on here, diapers is all you want to talk about and that is all they ever talk about. Then sometimes you get IMs from them and diapers is all they ever want to talk about and nothing else. They act like diapers is all you are ever into.

[sarah_ab]

There are people on this board who are fixated on one thing .

oh my god tell me about it... i mean how many times are diapers brought up... seriously... its soooo overdone by this point.

[Nat]

I hardly click on diaper threads. Almost all of them are the same. If I see something different, I click on it.

[Goerge]

This thread is about one persons intolerance towards disabled people. The word disabled has many definitions and pinpointing one particular group of disabled people is discrimination, DirtyRocker could you perhaps explain yourself on why you think its necessary to deny access on this board to people you perceive as mentally ill? Does this mean if a person makes a post that you disagree with they must have mental health problems? Huh!

[Horndog]

This thread is about one persons intolerance towards disabled people. The word disabled has many definitions and pinpointing one particular group of disabled people is discrimination, DirtyRocker could you perhaps explain yourself on why you think its necessary to deny access on this board to people you perceive as mentally ill? Does this mean if a person makes a post that you disagree with they must have mental health problems? Huh!

Read this post.

Response to blue comment:

I am -- and will always be -- tolerant of others.

EDIT: If you did a search on my profile of posts where I talk about people with mental disabilities, you'll come across some interesting reading that contradicts the whole, "DirtyRocker is not tolerant!" thing.

Response to red comment:

What I did recommend was having their forum accounts restricted, meaning temporarily or moderated access -- not revoked.

Everything is answered there.

[curiositykilledthecat]

[timmyc]

I still think any psychologist can take any random person and find something wrong with them. Probably more so on a fetish site.

[leery]

I'm no psychologist, but I agree with the OP that those who are mentally disrupted should not be rewarded for participating in something that would make their situation worse. Of course, we can't always live in a perfect world where said person gets immediate treatment for his/her problems. That said, I think it would be for the best to simply ask the person to willingly leave for a while to put his/her own thoughts into perspective. That way we avoid turning our backs on that particular member of the community, and that person would know he/she is always welcomed back. I know this is a touchy subject, but we all have to take a stand on it.

[heartwood]

Maybe as I get older, I become more grumpy, I don't know,

As I grow older I become more intelligent which results in caring and understanding. Thats all I have to say.

[Bettypooh]

I'm no psychologist, but I agree with the OP that those who are mentally disrupted should not be rewarded for participating in something that would make their situation worse. Of course, we can't always live in a perfect world where said person gets immediate treatment for his/her problems. That said, I think it would be for the best to simply ask the person to willingly leave for a while to put his/her own thoughts into perspective. That way we avoid turning our backs on that particular member of the community, and that person would know he/she is always welcomed back. I know this is a touchy subject, but we all have to take a stand on it.

Now there's a good answer but only if it would work The real issue here is that the people in question do not care what anyone else thinks. They do not want to see themselves as everyone else does because they can't handle the results. They don't understand that you can't force your way into a community- the people there have to want you to be a part of them or you can't become one of them. At best it's a lack of social skills whether there's any other issues or not. They can change if they want to- everyone can- but until that desire is manifested those who insist on socializing with them, even in a negative way, are only encouraging them to continue their presence unchanged.

Because of who these questionable persons are in their hearts, they will never get to be one of us simply because they don't meet this community's lowest standards. Their unwillingness to change their conduct while here sees to that. I go places where cussing is expected and I cuss. I go places where cussing is not expected and I don't cuss. The reason is that I seek acceptance at both places and I know that I have to change my behavior to get it. It takes little effort on my part, yet I gain a lot from it- which is why I do it. I do not hide the opposite parts- those who know me in both places know how I am in both places- and if anyone cares to ask I tell the truth. I do what I do so that others will be comfortable too- I want that as much as I want my own comfort. Only when they change their hearts will the persons in question gain what they seek and the rest of us cannot compel that to happen. The nearest that anyone can come to that is for the administration here to restrict them which it is unwilling to do- something else which we cannot compel either.

We've all made our thoughts and wishes known clearly- the rest is out of our hands and we have to accept that. If that troubles anyone too much then they can change their conduct by ignoring what they don't like to see, or by not coming here where they know it will be displayed in the first place. I see a warning sign as do some others and I think I'm interpreting it correctly. If so, then the end results will not be my fault and that's about all that I can do about it. I am here by choice and I can choose otherwise if I want to, which so far I don't. As to the persons in question I rarely read what they write and respond to them even less. They have a negative value to me and I shall treat them that way until they see the light and change their ways. I will not let them ruin my day. They are not worth my consideration, so I am giving them what they ask for even if it isn't what they want. Maybe someday they will learn and maybe not. Ces't la Vie!

Bettypooh, the Emoticon Restricted

[DiaperBoyKR]

I agree totally with Bettypooh. In order to become part of a community, you have to be willing to fit in with the community's "norms" however spaced out that might be. If in one place its to swear, cuss, act like an idiot, etc. (re. 4Chan) then go for it. But one of the goals of DD (as I understand it) is to help other of our AB/DL brethren see that they aren't freaks or wierdos. When we have some individuals making repeated posts with the goal of making people uncomfortable, it hurts that goal.

Admittedly theres not much we can do about it. Limited board access, number of posts, etc is all well and good and it might encourage folk to get along. Or it might encourage them to be even crazier. It is indeed, a two-edged sword. I read and post on the WoW forums alot. One of the main community rules there is "Don't Feed the Trolls", meaning not to respond or give encouragement to those who are actively trying to disrupt the community. I've started applying the same rule elsewhere.....here it means I actually check the author of a thread before I even click on it, and if its from <ahem> certain individuals, I don't even bother.

This might be the best approach, unfortunately, its not the most effective means at our disposal. I'll repeat what I said earlier....if we want to avoid a stereotype in the mainstream, we MUST be seen not to countenance over the top insanity, even if that gets us labeled.

[DiaperBoyKR]

I'm starting to notice a theme in many aspects of my life, and it all seems to point to a decision that must be made. Not just by me, but by my generation; the next group to steer this great nation in whatever direction we choose to take it. BY that, I mean what is being experienced here on the boards, I'm experiencing in my working life -- there's an influx of morons, in addition to the regular problems that have yet to be completely dealt with.

For example -- I've spent the last two years living and working in South Georgia. Over the last 23 months, I have been witness to countless incidents that can only be described as primitive behaviors by non-whites. I am POSITIVE that there is something wrong with black America. Yup, pretty much all of them. Be offended if you must, I will not apologize for my stance on this when I know that many more of you agree with me, even if you are too pussy to admit it. @DiaperboyKR is absolutely spot-on: Too many of us are afraid of being called intolerant, racist, or other things that the rest of you shout out as you trot around on your Moral Highhorses. . Little do you know, it's not a horse at all: It's actually a Pompous Ass.

It's time to stop being tolerant, and time to start taking some action! Grab your nets, boys, we're gonna be fishers of men!

Sorry for the double post, but I wanted to break up my thoughts.

I totally agree with Tris on this, but its not just young black America, its YOUNG AMERICA in general. And its starting to infect European and to some degree Asian cultures as well. I say this being a 26 year old. There is an increase in the number of adult children out there. Don't get excited, I'm not talking about new members of our community. I'm talking about putative adults who have no idea how to function as adults because everything's always been handed to them. There are some communities where this is worse than others (notably, lower-income areas, but also upper to upper middle class white areas). In general though, I've noticed that kids don't want to work anymore for what they want. They demand it and get upset when they don't get it. Part of this I think has to do with the increased "on-demand" nature of our culture (internet, smart phones, video games, Instant message, Twitter, etc.). The other part I think has to do with the educative mentality right now that teaches that whatever you do or whatever you want is right. Those combine to make a pretty dangerous synergy.

Being "un-pc" for a moment, tolerance is a concept that's only applied in one direction. Many groups (racial, sexual orientation, religious, disability, etc) demand tolerance of others without for a MOMENT considering being tolerant of the other side of the coin in return. They use "tolerance" and labels to bludgeon the other side into submission out of fear of speaking. I think tolerance is a great idea....it just needs to be a two-way street.

We need to be willing to call this out, not just here, but culturally when this crap happens. Otherwise, we're on a quick slide down into anarchy (as the Roman Empire did) and there's several other cultures out there WAITING to take our place.

[curiositykilledthecat]

Anyone ever notice how tolerance applies to every group except heterosexual white males, Christians and Jews. Personally free speech should apply to all groups and these 'protective laws' are complete bullshit. The progressives are incredibly hypocritical in their ideology.

[curiositykilledthecat]

You can only be forced into submission when you let them. I don't cower before any group when I know my cause is right!

[tris]

I say let the South secede and Mexico can have Texas back. Problem solved!

[timmyc]

For example -- I've spent the last two years living and working in South Georgia. Over the last 23 months, I have been witness to countless incidents that can only be described as primitive behaviors by non-whites. I am POSITIVE that there is something wrong with black America. Yup, pretty much all of them. Be offended if you must, I will not apologize for my stance on this when I know that many more of you agree with me, even if you are too pussy to admit it.

What a bunch of . Idiocy is not defined by race. I know upstanding citizens of all races and I know idiots of all races. I want to go on, but will keep things civilized.

I also think every generation in history has thought the generation directly behind them is slightly inferior, yet the world marches on.

[curiositykilledthecat]

Truer Words have not been stated.

[curiositykilledthecat]

*runs across forum with helmet on* WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

sorry it's a slow monday and I figured a few threads could use a bump.

[toon]

Crazy people are the entertainment around here.

Wetnmessy keeps me up to date on what the pervs are thinking.

Goerge keeps me up to date on what craziness looks like.

I'm a bit nuts myself but I think of it as a fun type of nuts. the kind you pick apart and eat all day. <<------laugh at that.

I give Rocker some props for constantly coming up with topics that have you all jumpin out of your skin to write back to.

Your a genius dude! I somewhat agree with you too! Do I think someone should be *(banned)* or whatever for being unstable? no.

I just ignore those people but I agree with the observation with the number of people who are just kinda

tolerance is important for me because I definitely need people to tolerate my silliness. If I cant be silly I'm just not me.

[curiositykilledthecat]

Toon, you're always welcomed here.

[Horndog]

I'm not banning people for being mentally unstable. I talked about account restriction, not revocation.

I have a lot of friends on here who are great people. Some of them have Asperger's. Some of them are autistic. Some of them are bi-polar or schizophrenic. Some of them are disabled, but you know what? They're great members who contribute to the community and they're wonderful people. They know I'm not demanding that they should be banned and I would never, ever consider suggesting that in a million years.