I'M So Busted

[Knuxie Fawks]

I would never even dream of being in that situation myself. It's about as bad as the scene in Grandma's Boy where the guy is jacking off to a Lara Croft doll and cums on his friend's mom.

[PampersPete]

There's a whole lot of drama goin' down on these boards lately. With that said,maybe she was the one doinkin' the maintainence man and needed a way out.

[Guest]

I've had my fair share of GF's over the years, and I have told almost every one of them about my fetish, and only one of them freaked out about it, and she was a psycopath from the begining. I think you did the right thing by moving out, it's time you move on, and find someone who is actually into this. I myself, wont "settle down" until I find what I'm looking for, but at the same time, I'm not holding my breath in hopes that I meet her ASAP. The best thing you can do right now is get your own place, and start playing the field again. This chick will start calling you, and wanting to talk, just make yourself too busy to talk to her, and just distance yourself from her altogether. Good luck on your search for a new place.

[Repaid1]

Without giving advise yet, I got a few questions. How long where you guys together? What is her back ground on up bringing? If/When you move out do you two have mutual friends? This "could" turn ugly...I only say that as moving out without her having her head on straight might make her go vindictive. She needs to be talked to as soon as possible. Whether you have to do it on your own turf or neutral ground. A base line needs to be established. A slow and sensible adult approach and conversation. If things get out of hand stop the conversation and resume later. Tell her how you feel about her honestly. Tell her about "us". Make sure you explain the part of not involving real children!!!

Tell her this is part of you, that you understand her feelings. Tell her your wrong for not bringing this out sooner and being deceiving about it. I'm hoping that over time she will come to realize that you are still you and the one she hopefully loves as well. If she has nothing to do with you after all this I don't see as you having lost much. While you might have have kept a secret from her, it seems as though she has done the same at this point with her actions and her true feelings about you. I do understand her freak'n out but the me or the diapers thing was way outta left field. I hope she choses to talk to you first and not blab to all her/your friends. Best of luck my friend.

[It'sJustMe]

Hi all. Thanks for all of the advice, I really appreciate it. I have an update.

Last night I was resigned to the fact that we were done and I was moving out today. So, I figured that since I am now single I can do what I want. I expected my (ex)GF to leave without waking me and that I may never see her again. I went to sleep in our spare bedroom wearing nothing but an Abriform X-plus.

To my surprise, this morning she came into the spare bedroom and woke me up. I could tell that she had been crying.

GF: Your moving out?

Me: Well yea, you said we were done and I wasn't going to ask you to leave. So I'm going to look for an apartment today.

GF: You don't even want to talk about it, you're just going to leave?

Me: You said that you couldn't even look at me. I would like to talk, but I didn't think there was a chance that you would talk to me about it.

GF: I may have over reacted, I was just so freaked out. And I am still mad that you have been lying to me this whole time and then tried to cover it up with more lies.

Me: I understand why you are mad, I was just scared to tell you because I didn't want to loose you. And then I freaked out when you caught me and lied more to again try to keep from loosing you. I know it was wrong and I am truly sorry.

GF: Well, please just don't do anything until I get home. I want to talk about it.

Me: okay I won't.

And then the BIG surprise of the morning. I was still under the covers and didn't think she knew I was wearing a diaper...

GF: <looking down towards my crotch area> Well, let me see it.

Me: <I pull the covers down exposing the diaper>

GF: <shaking her head and not appearing angry> You're very strange, but I do still love you.

GF: <Leaves for work>

I am not liking the fact that I have lost all control of the situation. But, I think it's worth letting her control this particular situation if it means I can keep her and the diapers. Choosing between the two will still be tough if it comes to that.

[Guest Baby-Toa]

that's great that she wanted to talk about it. I hope it works out for you.

[tommee]

Well, this certainly has been a roller-coaster of emotions, and I'm just sat here, reading this on my monitor, that you lived all this shit is unbelievable!

Well done, and good luck.

[babylin]

[quote name='It'sJustMe' date='16 July 2009 -

I am not liking the fact that I have lost all control of the situation. But, I think it's worth letting her control this particular situation if it means I can keep her and the diapers. Choosing between the two will still be tough if it comes to that.

Round One goes to your gf. Doesn't mean you have to lose control. Really shouldn't be a question of control in a relationship anyway.

You have bared your deepest secret (i suppose), so now it's your turn to find out hers. Trust is a two way street.

Also you should find out what her sexual fantacies are. What really turns her on? Let's hope that it is not dominating you.

She has said that she loves you, so acceptance of your diapers as part of you is all in the package. Don't give up! After the ultimatum you've received you are in for a challenging relationship. But seriously, if you had given it up, what did she expect? Like it never happened?

HAPPINESS IS WEARING COTTON DIAPERS

[Guest Saya]

I agree with babylin.

Let relationship isn't about control, its a two way thing, she freaked out and was in shocked, which she admitted to based on your texts. after rethinkin her actions she has probably rethought her actions. and now on the start of the accapting or denying stage. listen to rapid read what he said and follow his guide when you talk to her. If she wants do some research on it or want to know more bring her to us and we'll try and help the situation.

[herbie]

Wow, is it me? You didn't lose control, you got some back. She told you to chose her or the diapers. You chose the diapers. You called her bluff. Now she wants to talk. I agree with everybody here, it IS a shock for them to see us in diapers. But, they DO get over it and (usually) accept it. Freaking out over it is the exception, not the rule, I have found. The other thing, this "chose it or me" thing gets used a lot, even if you didn't wear diapers. It would be something .... motorcycle, golf, whatever it is that you want to take up. It's a game that never ends . If she feels she can't live without you, she will accept it. If she can live without you, you're toast. Up to you.

BTW, PP brought up an excellent point ..... the maintenance man. It happens.

[plusmbr]

I hope you are able to mend the relationship. You should have been honest with her before you moved in with each other.

Hi all. Thanks for all of the advice, I really appreciate it. I have an update.

Last night I was resigned to the fact that we were done and I was moving out today. So, I figured that since I am now single I can do what I want. I expected my (ex)GF to leave without waking me and that I may never see her again. I went to sleep in our spare bedroom wearing nothing but an Abriform X-plus.

To my surprise, this morning she came into the spare bedroom and woke me up. I could tell that she had been crying.

GF: Your moving out?

Me: Well yea, you said we were done and I wasn't going to ask you to leave. So I'm going to look for an apartment today.

GF: You don't even want to talk about it, you're just going to leave?

Me: You said that you couldn't even look at me. I would like to talk, but I didn't think there was a chance that you would talk to me about it.

GF: I may have over reacted, I was just so freaked out. And I am still mad that you have been lying to me this whole time and then tried to cover it up with more lies.

Me: I understand why you are mad, I was just scared to tell you because I didn't want to loose you. And then I freaked out when you caught me and lied more to again try to keep from loosing you. I know it was wrong and I am truly sorry.

GF: Well, please just don't do anything until I get home. I want to talk about it.

Me: okay I won't.

And then the BIG surprise of the morning. I was still under the covers and didn't think she knew I was wearing a diaper...

GF: <looking down towards my crotch area> Well, let me see it.

Me: <I pull the covers down exposing the diaper>

GF: <shaking her head and not appearing angry> You're very strange, but I do still love you.

GF: <Leaves for work>

I am not liking the fact that I have lost all control of the situation. But, I think it's worth letting her control this particular situation if it means I can keep her and the diapers. Choosing between the two will still be tough if it comes to that.

[HuggieBaby]

Wow, i gotta say i thought things were over after the "choose it or me" post, but its looking a lot better. Honestly if it was me, i would've told her straight out that i'd choose the diapers, because they're a part of me and thats unfair. I've noticed usually(don't hold me to this lol) people will give that ultimatum, and when their bluff is called they cave. I've had a few situations where I was given the option, where i've always chosen the thing other than the girl. Then when they say..."you'd let ______ come between us?", i just say "no, you're the one letting it come between us". I understand that relationships go both ways, and that you do need to compromise, but there is a huge difference between compromise and outright sacrafice. I just find it unfair to ask anyone to completely stop something just because it bothers you.

Anyways, good luck, sounding like she might at the least accept you and let you diaper it up in private.

HuggieBaby

[ranger]

That sucks, but you brought it upon yourself. I'm guessing next time you'll be up-front about it, and not have to come out the hard way.

Do yourself a favor and just move out. You don't deserve to be treated like a baby, even if you want to be. Both of you are going to need some space.

Dang, kick a guy when he's down why don't ya.

[diaperboyMKE]

What a c*** (Censored by Repaid). I'll be damned if a girl would ever give me an ultimatum. (unless it was "her or (something destructive))

IMO, Ultimatums are for weak negotiators and people who don't value their chips very highly.

In other words, she was willing to lose the relationship based on the flip of the coin basically. You could have chosen to go either direction.

You need to diaper up, and tell that bitch "listen, I think I reconsidered my decision, upon further review of your selfish closed minded ultimatum, I'd like to take the opportunity to be rid of you and your "perfect" self."

Have a few drinks before you do it, it'll help build up your courage, sounds like you'll need it to stand up to that bitch.

Seriously.. She caught you with your pants down (and diaper up) [pun]. She knew this, and she still presented you with an ultimate, sounds like she was capitalizing on your obvious precarious position in order to get what she wanted.

Worse part is, she had time to THINK about it before she presented you with a garbage bag? JESUS. I'd pulled the bag over her head and said "humm... finally look good enough to fuck" and I would have tossed the key on the dresser and gave her the peace sign on my way out.

Damn this get's me all fired up. Dumb bitch prob conspired this plan with one of her dumb girlfriends, girls aren't smart enough to come up with a plan like that on their own.

Damn dude, think of breaking up with her.. like shaking the clap.

[Guest Baby-Toa]

I'll be damned if a girl would ever give me an ultimatum. (unless it was "her or (something destructive))

IMO, Ultimatums are for weak negotiators and people who don't value their chips very highly.

In other words, she was willing to lose the relationship based on the flip of the coin basically. You could have chosen to go either direction.

You need to diaper up, and tell that bitch "listen, I think I reconsidered my decision, upon further review of your selfish closed minded ultimatum, I'd like to take the opportunity to be rid of you and your "perfect" self."

Have a few drinks before you do it, it'll help build up your courage, sounds like you'll need it to stand up to that bitch.

Seriously.. She caught you with your pants down (and diaper up) [pun]. She knew this, and she still presented you with an ultimate, sounds like she was capitalizing on your obvious precarious position in order to get what she wanted.

Worse part is, she had time to THINK about it before she presented you with a garbage bag? JESUS. I'd pulled the bag over her head and said "humm... finally look good enough to fuck" and I would have tossed the key on the dresser and gave her the peace sign on my way out.

Damn this get's me all fired up. Dumb bitch prob conspired this plan with one of her dumb girlfriends, girls aren't smart enough to come up with a plan like that on their own.

Damn dude, think of breaking up with her.. like shaking the clap.

if you didn't read. He did make up with her for the moment and i'm sure they are talking about it or will talk about it.

[datsun240z]

i'm sorry, but given the attitudes, i can't help but conclude that most of the people on this forum are introverted basment-dwellers, and have the "nice guy" mentality, and are either virgins, or have never slept with a woman under 200lbs.

first off, no. DON'T be "open" and tell your girlfriend at the beginning of a relationship that you have a kink that involves putting on a diaper, shitting yourself, sucking your thumb, and pretending your a baby. that's horrid advice, that's a good way to scare off any one.

when she caught you, you should have let her calm down, and explained it to her, and let her know that it's just a kink, and it does not involve children.. also that there are 3 kinds of people in this world 1: those who have kinks 2: people who lie about it 3: people who have not discovered it.

also, when she came in with a trash bag, and said to throw it away, i would have called bullshit. NOT because you had to choose between her and the diapers, but because she had the audacity to order you around, and hold the relationship over your head. if she loves you, she won't leave you over it, and is just bluffing. but by you trying to sneak around like a f**king coward, you made matters worse.

people please grow a spine. especially when dealing with women. if you lose a girlfriend, there are plenty more out there. no girl should ever be able to say "do_______ or i'm leaving"

but i'm sure you have already set a precedent early on in the relationship, of being dependent on her, and she probably uses that to control you

any one that is terrified of a girl leaving them, deserves to be alone. have enough self respect to not be a fucking door mat, and realize that if she won't give you what you want, than there are plenty of other girls that will (i.e. her sister, her friends yadda yadda, etc)

[BriGuy]

i'm sorry, but given the attitudes, i can't help but conclude that most of the people on this forum are introverted basment-dwellers, and have the "nice guy" mentality, and are either virgins, or have never slept with a woman under 200lbs.

first off, no. DON'T be "open" and tell your girlfriend at the beginning of a relationship that you have a kink that involves putting on a diaper, shitting yourself, sucking your thumb, and pretending your a baby. that's horrid advice, that's a good way to scare off any one.

when she caught you, you should have let her calm down, and explained it to her, and let her know that it's just a kink, and it does not involve children.. also that there are 3 kinds of people in this world 1: those who have kinks 2: people who lie about it 3: people who have not discovered it.

also, when she came in with a trash bag, and said to throw it away, i would have called bullshit. NOT because you had to choose between her and the diapers, but because she had the audacity to order you around, and hold the relationship over your head. if she loves you, she won't leave you over it, and is just bluffing. but by you trying to sneak around like a f**king coward, you made matters worse.

people please grow a spine. especially when dealing with women. if you lose a girlfriend, there are plenty more out there. no girl should ever be able to say "do_______ or i'm leaving"

but i'm sure you have already set a precedent early on in the relationship, of being dependent on her, and she probably uses that to control you

any one that is terrified of a girl leaving them, deserves to be alone. have enough self respect to not be a fucking door mat, and realize that if she won't give you what you want, than there are plenty of other girls that will (i.e. her sister, her friends yadda yadda, etc)

Well fucken put! I will have to agree and concur with everything you just said. I was thinking it and you voiced it.

I also find it interesting and funny that these people are telling him to do something they wouldn't do themselves. I can't count how many threads I have read where people lament the fact they cannot share this side of them with anyone else because they won't be accepted.

~Brian

[Mr. Sea Otter]

Wow. Quite a thread here. A couple of thoughts.

I'm not going to get into the what you should have done stuff. Whats done is done. Learn from your mistakes (and I really think there is one major lesson to be learned and most people have already pointed it out) and be a better person as a result of them. For now, you need to not dwell on it and think about what you are going to do. Forget about all this 'who is in control' stuff. You need to just work on basic communication and stop worry and analyzing who has the upper hand here.

I think one thing you might want to tell her is that this whole "its them or me" thing isn't fair, because honestly you don't have a choice. Sure you could throw all the stuff out, but that won't make you stop being a DL any more than a homosexual person throwing out their gay porn stash will make them straight. You are who you are and you need to come clean about it.

I think your first priority if you are going to try to make this work will be to do some major education! She needs to understand what this is (and probably more importantly what it is not).

Good luck man,

[DL_Master]

Honesty is the key to any relationship, I'm glad that she kind of accepts it now she got over the initial shock and I'm glad your relationship is on the mend, who knows, maybe we'll have a convertee!

[It'sJustMe]

Okay, I have another update. But first, thanks to Mr. Sea Otter for your post. I used your excellent analogy to help describe the situation I'm in. Luckily I checked in to read the posts just after you posted, then went to have "the talk".

I was out for work when she came home today, so the talk was pushed back until later. And, she was in the shower when I came home so I quickly logged in and read the replies on here. Thanks goodness I did because Mr. Otters post helped a lot.

I was in the living room waiting and drinking a beer when she came down. She sat down on the couch with me and faced me. She just said "ok, please explain this thing you do and why you do it".

I had already decided to tell her the whole story going back to when I first started wearing. So I did, and she listened and asked questions here and there. It felt really great to tell her everything.

I used Mr. Otters analogy of taking a gay man's gay porn stash away wouldn't make him straight to explain to her that this fetish is part of me that probably won't ever go away. I explained that I had thrown everything away a few times (including when we first moved in together), but I alway ended up going out and buying more. Of course the whole "does this have anything to do with kids" thing

came up, I quickly squashed that one.

I told her flat out that she was going to have to accept me as I am or this relationship wouldn't work. She said that she would ignore it if I kept it private as I had done before. I agreed but added in that I may sleep downstairs from time to time if I felt the desire to wear them to bed. She agreed. So, I guess the crisis is averted for now. I will keep the diapers hidden for now and life will go on as it has. I do plan to move them more into the open over time as I am not going to keep sleeping downstairs every time I want to wear a diaper to bed.

Thanks to all the kind advice I received over this!... and pfffft to all the jerks. You'd think that people in this "community" would be a little bit more understanding to someone who is having a problem with this admittedly strange fetish we all share.

[PampersPete]

ItsJustMe:Congratulations-you just handed your balls and your manhood to someone who obviously doesn't deserve them.

[diaperpt]

For being on a site which is about a fetish most people out there think of as anywhere from fringe to sick and perverted, there seems to be a lot of strange attitudes.

I'm not going to tell how people should think and act; I don't particularly like the feeling that in order to keep my job and family I need to keep the diaper thing a secret. It is however, true. I MUST keep the diaper thing a secret. So you want to go out and bash everyone else in the head with your wet, dirty diaper...go for it! Maybe that's right for you...do you REALLY think that makes it right for everyone else?

It seems that an amazing number of people are ready to tell Freta, Diapered_Witch, It'sJustMe and any number of others just how to think, act and be. There is only one way - and its their way. They are willing to tell people how to be in relationship; its about YOU...only YOU. Don't let the other person push you around - they are presumably there for YOU to push around. THAT'S the way to have a successful relationship. They are very open minded...just don't tell them anything they don't want to hear.

Look...do whatever you feel like. I guess you've got the RIGHT to say anything you want. On the other hand, I'm just amazed you think that what might (or might not) be right for you and work for you is automatically right for every other person in every other situation.

There is however a level of acceptance that some of you seem to DEMAND of others...and yet you won't even allow anywhere near the same level of acceptance for others on this site!

Finally, understand that I'm writing this out of a certain level of frustration - because I know that this will not change a single opinion out there. I write it though as a statement of what seems to be truth to me. It may or may not have anything to do with your truth. Intelligent, open people may read it and disagree - and that's OK. Some - intelligent or not - may read it, label me with some disrespectful label and at least just get on with their lives. I suppose some of the more crude replies on this thread have been posted by others - out of frustration that they can't make everyone in the world change to be JUST LIKE THEM...

[AutieAB]

thank the forum Gods for the ignore function.

Totally. And to the OP, it's your life. Everyone has an opinion but it's not them who has to live under your roof every day. Do what makes you happy and ignore the trolls in this thread.

oh and don't forget to keep whining and wondering why the rest of the world thinks that the community is a bunch of pervs.

I haven't used this old Usenet term in years but...

* Plonk *

[sarah_ab]

I still think she's bad news.

she is too quick to fly off the handle, to quick to order you to do what she wants, then comes to you and trys to 'talk about it' when she realizes that you are going to move out, you who most likely contribute 50% of the bills? yeah... so kind and considerate of her.

I say stick to your original plan and MOVE OUT! QUICK!

[Mingo]

i'm sorry, but given the attitudes, i can't help but conclude that most of the people on this forum are introverted basment-dwellers, and have the "nice guy" mentality, and are either virgins, or have never slept with a woman under 200lbs.

first off, no. DON'T be "open" and tell your girlfriend at the beginning of a relationship that you have a kink that involves putting on a diaper, shitting yourself, sucking your thumb, and pretending your a baby. that's horrid advice, that's a good way to scare off any one.

when she caught you, you should have let her calm down, and explained it to her, and let her know that it's just a kink, and it does not involve children.. also that there are 3 kinds of people in this world 1: those who have kinks 2: people who lie about it 3: people who have not discovered it.

also, when she came in with a trash bag, and said to throw it away, i would have called bullshit. NOT because you had to choose between her and the diapers, but because she had the audacity to order you around, and hold the relationship over your head. if she loves you, she won't leave you over it, and is just bluffing. but by you trying to sneak around like a f**king coward, you made matters worse.

people please grow a spine. especially when dealing with women. if you lose a girlfriend, there are plenty more out there. no girl should ever be able to say "do_______ or i'm leaving"

but i'm sure you have already set a precedent early on in the relationship, of being dependent on her, and she probably uses that to control you

any one that is terrified of a girl leaving them, deserves to be alone. have enough self respect to not be a fucking door mat, and realize that if she won't give you what you want, than there are plenty of other girls that will (i.e. her sister, her friends yadda yadda, etc)

I really have no idea why you said this. Nothing in the thread merited the majority of this post.