BabyBoi91

I’m really glad you found them helpful. While I haven’t read their personal books, I have read some of the fiction published on their site and it was pretty high quality (I read it before it was published and still being edited). i was really impressed and totally agreed it needed to be published, so I’m glad they exist as a publisher . also, That’s great that you got past some barriers! Especially with your unpotty training ! ??? Sounds like you definitely belong in diapers , or at most pull-ups (but probably just diapers ) from now on. Best wishes !!

I agree. Considering how fundamental the shame/guilt vs control paradigm is during the “potty training” years, I kindof always assumed that those issues were near the heart of my drive as well. i also agree it’s pretty complex, as there are definitely other things outside of the “shame vs control” paradigm, especially with regards to regression.

At this point, when I lie down I just start to drip. And by the time I’m asleep there’s usually a few streams worth. Im soaked some mornings if not most. sittijg is less dramatic but still happens. Prolly just due to kinking of the path. that said, lying down use to be difficult. big thing for me is I don’t “try” anymore. I really do just relax and trust my body. It definitely took a while, to really trust myself and get rid of all that tension.

Yes I completely agree that urodynamic models are good for inclusion but exclusion. Most (good) urologists I know do just that. Good point. my comment about the spinal cord (actually I mentioned sacral plexus which isn’t part of the spinal cord) and bladder is SOLELY for infants. The sacral plexus is what regulates bladder release at birth. The signals don’t even need to go up to the brain. It is a primitive reflex (we have many, like the palmar reflex and the suckling reflex and the rooting reflex). Once the brain develops, our brain suppresses many (not all) primitive reflexes because they are “not needed.” And you also bring up a fair point that not all doctors keep up with advancing medical literature or have patient-centered approaches to care. I would say the vast majority of doctors I’ve had, met, or worked with are pretty good in this regard , but I’ve also had my fair share who are just trying to get a paycheck and the next patient. Those I avoid at all cost. It’s true that people usually use some of their pelvic floor muscles during masturbation (especially men when ejaculating). some people find having weaker pelvic floor muscles helps then “train incontinence” faster. So they limit their masturbation. Others don’t have a problem. there are definitely links in the reverse — incontinence being linked to sexual dysfunction. But limiting masturbation is probably a “try it for yourself and see if it helps advance your goals?” kind of thing. I used the anatomical arguments of why it would accelerate training make “sense,” but personally I have found no affect either way. Others find a benefit to avoiding it. Often times , jsut because something sounds logical doesn’t mean it becomes true for the body. ?

Lol, I don’t think I said anything in Latin. i actually spoke up because you are saying things that are grossly incorrect and/or harmful. Which is how I knew you weren’t in the medical field. No person in the medical field in their right mind would spew lies like you do. “30+ experience on you” means nothing. As an ABDL myself, I actually deeply care about and respect the community here and that’s why I spoke up. People deserve a chance to know they’re being sold snake oil. Have a good day.

Doesn’t matter. Med school taught me that stuff . I’m not here to work ?. But it does frustrate me when people give really bad medical information about the human body. That’s why I spoke up. have a good day though.? cheers

You mean a doctor ? Yes.

Except even in adults, not all muscles are controlled by the human brain. The small and large intestinal muscles are directly controlled but the nerves in the gut and the nerves directly respond to feedback from the intestines (stretching, chemical releases locally, etc). skeletal muscular reflexes are also not controlled by the brain but directly mediated by the spinal column. The nerve impulses never even travel to the brain. The reason being that those reflexes are protective — I need to jerk my hand away from a hot stove so fast that I don’t have to think, if I have to wait for the heat sensor to reach my brain, the burn will be much worse (reflex nerves are actually among the fastest nerves in the body, whereas pain nerves are the slowest). The sympathetic (autonomic) and parasympathetic nervous systemic are also not directly controlled by the brain. They are a massive feedback loop that include lots of different glands, hormones , cytokines, intercellular signals, and they are both “always on” in a state of fluctuating balance. While the brain may play an important part in the neurological regulation, there is so much more that happens . So to say that the brain controls smooth muscle (e.g., internal sphincter, blood vessels, intestines, even the muscles in our hair follicles) is just a lie. they are involuntary muscles that increase and decrease tone in response to specific stimuli (sometimes having nothing to do with the brain, like when our blood vessels constrict or we get goosebumps because it’s cold outside). Please stop accepting medical advice from this guy. He’s a fraud.

This isn’t true. Elimination control is not regulated by the brain at birth . It’s done by the sacral plexus until the brain develops enough to override . It seems more like you’re trying to redefine a word . I’m kindof hesitant to trust claims that the “entire global medical community” doesn’t know what they are talking about, especially when it’s about the definition of a word, that is a medical word in nature.

Some of this is correct, but not all. Infant elimination is actually all reflexive. It’s handled by the spinal cord/sacral plexus and is a complex reflex that doesn’t even involve the brain (similar to how the “knee jerk” is mediated through the spinal cord and doesn’t require the brain). Part of growing up is that the brain is able to suppress “primitive” reflexes. And allow the prefrontal cortex to take control. And like you said, after a while things become basically automatic. what OP is describing is primarily trainingsrelaxation as a resting state, like you said. But it also does involve some disuse atrophy. It’s why you see elderly patients develop incontinence if put into diapers for incorrect, but they can be “retrained” over several months if helped. atrophy can happen very quickly . If you have the flu and stay in bed for 3 days, you will have some mild atrophy that would affect you if you tried to go the gym or run a few days later, even if you felt 100%. Atrophy is rarely permanent unless there is a neurolological cause or some other injury causing it. that said, the longer it exists the longer it can take a muscle to get back to normal. and to answer OP, I am def here. I drip most of the day/night. And it take A LOT of effort to close it, but even then it doesn’t stay closed. I found personal meditation / self-hypnosis to really helpful with this.

So I agree with OP, it’s possible to train ourself to become “incontinent.” I think the term “diaper dependent” implies more psychological dependence, which may also be true. But I’m at a point after years of practicing muscle relaxation as well as self-hypnosis that my bladder just drips near constantly, diaper or not. I wet the bed almost every night in my sleep, and any attempts at not wearing diapers or even going short periods don’t work and lead to dripping on the floor or other accidenrs. The muscles are just too weak due to disuse and I’m ok with that. It’s a lot more comfortable that what I was dealing with before.

So one thing that I learned was to not approach this so black and white: Yes, I always wanted to wear 24/7 but don’t equate NOT wearing 24/7 with failure. Be the best you in the moment. If you want to wear 24/7, that’s great! Set that as a goal. It’s totally achievable. The path to accepting yourself in diapers 24/7 starts with accepting where you are now—including what makes you comfortable or uncomfortable. if there are parts of diaper wearing that make you uneasy, that’s ok. It’s a process. Don’t shy away from those areas. Like others are saying though: learn too love yourself just how you are, even if you aren’t at your goal. And I’m the mean time, you can work towards your goal , including working through any residual shame of wearing .

So your urologist actually was basically saying “prefers to manage incontinence with diapers”… the fact he also wrote “does not want their incontinence treated” means he diagnosed you as incontinent but that you declined medical treatment (aka meds or other interventions). remembers, he’s a doctor, he gets paid to write meds and do surgeries. Diapers are like the least “preferred” management from urology perspective (because it manages, it doesn’t treat), but urologists know some people just prefer to manage it that way. So, yeah, he could have been a little more formal and say “prefers to manage with diapers” instead of “likes to wear diapers” but… the more important thing is your doctor wrote “does not want their incontinence treated.” that validated your diagnosis and that you willingly refused urological treatment — which is totally fine. Side effects and risky surgeries, there’s prolly nonABDLs who decline it too .

Question, are you trying to grow breasts with a doctor’s or just OTC herbals? Highly recommend the former. And usually I don’t think coffee interferes too much with HRT, not if you’re just drinking 1 or 2 cups a day, especially if you skin coffee some days .

End of year update: hey everyone! Figured it’s been almost a year and wanted people to know: I’m still incontinent and the hypnosis definitely worked! the year has been interesting though. As I mentioned before, I noticed I lost bowel control instantly and it still remains gone. Stuff just moves through me passively, which feels great. (I had already been having issues with stress incontinence here and the hypnosis just helped my body fully accept all of it, because I really did want it). the bedwetting went though waves. It was very frequent at first after th hypnosis, then I would go through times where I would question what I wanted (and I would start waking up middle of the night with a full bladder). Needless to say, I realized my sleep quality was so much higher as a bed wetter (well…diaper) and the bedwetting resumed. daytime wetting was my biggest struggle, and I was my own biggest hurdle. I think I just kept telling myself how difficult it would be to lose control, let go, or pee in some position, etc. all of those things were just my own personal fears / expectations getting in the way. Eventually, I realized my body could learn to let go on signal just like it used to learn hold it on signal — basically reverse potty training. This was a huge breakthrough moment for me and one that happened just recently. I also got the nerve to tell my doctor about my incontinence issues—which have always been a issue, just much stronger thanks to hypnosis. And I was able to explain how long things had been going on and my preferred way of managing things , as well as talk with my doctor about where she wanted to at least check some things (which is fine… I do actually have incontinence, so I get it). I also let her know I don’t want any procedures or anything invasive, and she respects that. She didn’t make me feel stupid for managing this with diapers or even calling them diapers (though she called them briefs). Lastly, my family and a few friends have been super supportive through all this — both with my medical stuff and my decision to pursue hypnosis to become incontinent. And yeah, there’s def been moments of “am I sure I want this?” (Which is funny that I think I still have a choice, given I can’t keep my pants dry for longer than 5-10 minutes without a diaper on). But I’ve never gone back to underwear. I’ve just worked through it. and I think working through those questions (without purging) has been healthy.

If it takes you extreme amount of time, condom catheters work … personally if I sit there with a cup in the bathroom and wait 10-20 minutes or so I can usually produce enough for a sample. They don’t need very much. It’s boring but doable.

So a good therapist def won’t judge you. Therapy isn’t about judging you, it’s about a professional helping you explore who you are and gain insight into yourself, as well as supporting you in everyday life (depending on the type of therapy)… ive told my therapists and it’s been a non issue. At times they have asked more, others have just kindof said “hey whatever u do between u and your partner is consensually is fine.” their reaction may depend in part what and why you are telling them. If it’s causing you distress, I would def talk with them. That’s literally what they are there for. If there’s something about it bugging you or you are trying to understand something — also a pretty good reason. If you just want to and don’t even know why— even that may be worth exploring. the only thing I can think of is , is this your very first visit , and if so, is this the primary reason you are going to therapy… if not, and if it is the first visit, then maybe there are other pressing issues ?? but that said , talking about a personal topic and trying to understand yourself is totally allowable And in case I didn’t answer clearly : every therapist I have talked to about it has either been supportive, supportively inquisitive, or in one case slightly awkward about it (and let’s be honest, some people just have trouble talking about this stuff ).

My boyfriend has been a bedwetter his entire life (he’s in his late 20s now). He told me up front . he’s also a Little so likes to wear diapers. Prior to our relationship , he didn’t wear diapers every night cuz he was embarrassed and in previous relationships would just deal with wet sheets a few times a month. With wearing every night , he wakes up wet about 3-5 nights a week. He personally likes it (again, he’s a little and he feels like someone finally just accepts him). It’s pretty cute imo.

I can definitely say that wearing 24/7 (due to initial bladder problems) for a few years has now lead to complete bladder and bowel incontinence . I’m fine with it . Much more comfortable this way. the few times I tried to go a few days without diapers were disastrous. I didn’t even have to try too hard. I think the bigger thing was “not trying”. Just letting go and letting my body just do whatever on it’s time .

I have definitely succeeded at becoming IC . I achieved fecal IC through working with an actual hypnotist who specialized in abdl hypnosis. We also worked on urinary and I definitely developed urinary incontinence, but my appreciation of it took a while. I can’t go without diapers anymore. For one, my bowels just empty reflexively at this point. I may feel fullness and within seconds it’s done. Personally, I found this a lot less stressful and less painful (but that’s another story). but even with urinary issues (which I’ve had for several years), if I try to “go commando” for a bit, my shorts end up very damp but I have no clue how. So I’m guessing I dribble or leak at a very slow rate without any feeling of it. I have started wetting while asleep, which I really enjoy. And I’ve even started wetting without even realizing it until after it’s happened. So yeah, I definitely am diaper dependent at this point. I would echo that becoming incontinent is definitely possible but you must really want it and work through any reservations first . Personally I wish I had figured this out years ago. that said, I have definitely experienced some of the more “negative” emotions about incontinence: being nervous about messing around a friend, figuring out where to change when I’m out, feeling like I don’t want to go out sometimes (or can’t cuz I need to shower rq), and more. So it’s not a walk in the park, but my family and close friends are def supportive. And overall, I def prefer my life this way than being continent .

This is absolutely untrue and tbh a little stigmatizing. I know of a few incontinent adults on this forum and others that have talked about how they started as incotinent and were drawn to the ABDL side of things as away to cope. “Kiddy” printed diapers have no bearing on whether you “see yourself as incontient.” I happen to know someone who is incontinent IRL who sees “plain white adult diapers” as the “tighty-whiteys” of the diaper realm. They use them, but they also have a selection of printed/ colored diapers just to have variety (and theyre not ABDL, nor is their spouse, though they certainly don’t judge anyone who is).

Been wearing 24/7 for over a year. And nearly 24/7 for several years. Both bladder and bowel IC are achievable if you really want it. just be willing to give up on any and all hang-ups and be patient with your body.

I believe you experienced “stress incontinence” in the poop department . Basically just pooping when u coughed/sneezed/blew your nose, likely because you already needed to and then had extra pressure . Yes, weakening some of the urinary muscles can weaken the “taint” muscles which will in turn weaken part of the mechanism we use to keep the anus closed. But in general, you will likely keep most of your bowel control if u want to . that said, u can always talk with your doctor if it keeps happening or concerns you.

Here’s my best recommendation: take your metric/goal of “oblivious to whether I’m wet or dry” and actually forget about it. I’m serious :). chances are it could already be happening, but your definition of “oblivious” and “wet or dry” are so exact that you don’t notice. For example, after a little over a year of zero underwear and all diapers , I hVe tried wearing shorts (commando style) for a few hours. Every time I do it? The shorts are damp by the time I’m done. I will swear I do not wet them , and I’m def not sweating . But they are damp (and need changing) and smell like pee. So clearly I’m leaking . On the same token, I occasionally wet the bed and even my diaper with zero warning . Sometimes my diaper is way wetter than I remember using . Sometimes it leaks and I def don’t remember using it that much . while we might rationalize it as “oh I was distracted” or “oh I still knew I was wet...”, that’s just the mind making up an excuse. In reality these are all parts of being incontinent and needing diapers. So enjoy it all :).

I can definitely relate. For me, I began losing bowel control first through hypnosis , but bladder control was more fidgety. I kept telling myself I still had control — yet if I went any time without diapers my shorts were very damps and I somehow would rationalize it away. I think the mind just takes a while to accept things sometimes, and that’s ok. Even recently I was questioning whether I still had bladder control, but as I’m reading this post my bladder empties on its own. I do think my first “hurdle” was accepting that incontinence due to training was just as valid as any form. In fact, choosing to wear and use diapers is valid regardless of your level of control. figuring that out and also learning to accept that my incontinence doesn’t have to look like anything specific . Those two things really helped.