marinus18

Why though? I mean without diapers waking up wet is cold and clammy and if the parents make you clean your own bedding then just that is unpleasant enough to be a punishment. I had an episode of bedwetting when I was 7 (I think it played a big part in my interest in ABDL) and my mom never punished me in any way. To her it was just a problem that she needed to find the origin of and then the solution. After all why would a 7/8 year old pee in his bed? (My 8th birthday was during it). I actually asked her about this just last week and she said she thinks the whole idea of punishing a child for this is stupid and cruel. I mean it's already unpleasant so why double down on it? She often discussed with me why it's happening and what kind of solution would should do.

I don't think many. People who are incontinent will try to hide that. After all for them it's a weakness rather than a choice. Also ABDL diapers are much thicker and more colorful which is not what most adults want. If you are incontinent you're not going to pee all at once.

I eventually found another one. The one I first found just had really weird proportions. I would think though that legs would be the real determining factor. Since the torso needs to be lose in order to allow breathing and things like belly make it highly variable. Legs however are completely fixed in length and that was the issue. The XL and XXL jumped almost two inches in leg length. But the one I now have I do like though it rips really easily. I wish I would be able to find one that was a little tougher.

Most disposables are between 4k and 6k while cloth is between 2k and 3k. Though total volume is not really relevant as diapers are not symmetrical. You can't really fill up one side and then put it on backwards. I tried that and it really felt off.

I tried that but boosters and liners just crumple up. Diapers have waist- and leg bands to hold them in place. I often wear diapers for a long time without using them. But eventually the diaper get's worn. So I usually then double up the one I wore during the week and have some wet fun during the weekend. Stuffers really feel good to wear though. They don't clump up like the diapers do or at least not as much. I wish though there were stuffers with strong adhesives. That stay in firmly once you put them in as I often have to do 'maintenance" to straighten the stuffer back out when it starts crumpling up. Question: Do stuffers help or hinder the spread? I still suffer a lot with leaks and I have 5600ml diapers.

So.......cloths are better at distributing? Your comment is a little hard to understand. Disposable have cloth beat in volume hands down at least that's what the instructions say. Many disposables have roughly double the capacity of cloth. Though then again I don't think you'll pee 5 liters in a single day unless you're deliberately trying to.

It's 88 cm which is almost a whole foot off from either XXL or XXXL. For some reason that one jump is massive. The proportions for me just are really off. I think it's because I'm tall but not really obese. So I need large sizes in height but not in width which is why the torso needs to be so much shorter than my legs. Though it's annoying the jump from XXL to XXXL is so large since it means neither one will fit. What other onesies like that are there? I've tried looking but full suits are surprisingly very hard to find. I think I would have to go for one without footies so that the vertical size doesn't have to be so exact but those are even harder to find.

But with other clothing I've never had this. With my pyjama's I always just went XL and both fit fine. With the legs how should I measure? Like in the picture with my legs spread from my crotch to the ground. Or just measure my leg on it's own? That makes a 2 size difference. From the crotch down comes out at size L and just my leg is size XXL.

I did measure myself but the proportions really just don't add up. In torso I'm below S size while in legs I'm above XL.

I'm 191 cm and have a waist of around 37 and weigh around 115 kg. The one I want is a full body onesee. The measurements though just don't seem to line up. https://ab-dl-tb-club-shop.nl/volwassen-print-jammies-met-voeten?tag=jammies

I want to get a onesie but I just can't get the size. According my measurements my torse needs size L but my legs need size XXL. I've never had the idea of having abnormal proportions so is there something I'm not doing right? How do they measure your legs? Diapers already are very different in size. I use size M while with regular underwear I have XXL. I'm not a hardcore ABDL and not very rich so before I drop 60 euro's on something I want to know for sure it won't go to waste.

They have a lot of overlap. Both is retreating into your little space and reverting to a simpler state of mind. Either that be infantile or animalistic. Also both are just really cute. Furry is mostly just a little less specific. I don't think the whole thing about hiding your diapers is true though. After all if you're already acting like a weirdo by being in a fursuit then a diaper really doesn't change anything. I've always been an obnoxious strange guy because of my severe autism so when I revealed by diapers to my family they really didn't think much of it. Compared to a lot of the other weird crap I do diapers seem pretty innocent.

Sometimes it's also a question if they need to know. Sometimes you just don't tell someone because they don't need to know it. Your boss from work really has no business knowing your private life and I would think most bosses wouldn't really care. In many stories I've read it's always a big dramatic thing when the ABDL is revealed but in my experience indifference is the thing I see most. As long as you don't wear stinky diapers around them they really just don't care.

I have started doing it. I rarely use them. Usually when I plan to use them I put on a new pair and pet my worn but unused ones over on top of it.

I have started wearing diapers a few weeks ago and I want to wear them for longer. But even if you don't use them do you have to change them every day? I mean you have to do that with regular underwear. How long do any of you feel comfortable wearing a 'clean' diaper? Maybe I just got unlucky with the 2 boxes I got but with me after about 20 hours or so the padding has gone into hard clumps that really dig into my pelvis bones when I sit down and especially when on the bicycle. Also it's usually pretty moist from just sweat.

That is lazy parenting because she doesn´t make it clear why you deserve it. Our mom would always explain it exactly. She was an intellectual so believed understanding was key so we had to discipline. Punishment was merely a tool to make sure we would listen. Punishing a child without explanation regardless of if it's physical or not is abusive. Even if she didn't spank and just did things like grounding and chores without explaining why it would still be bad. Really? Is that age truly accurate? I think spankings have gone out of favor because people have more time to raise their kids. One big advantage of spankings is that they are much quicker. You don't have to go into lengthy talks. You can just tell them what they did wrong and spank them and they will accept it. Now however families are smaller and modern tech has drastically cut down on the time needed for household chores. Before children HAD to do their chores as a single mother was simply unable to do it on her own. Now though a single mother can do all the chores of a 3 children household reasonably easily. So making sure they do their chores is no longer essential and she has the time to spend on other discipline methods. Also today the understanding of psychology is much greater than it was before so there are many more techniques available that don't include physical force. My mom was really into that and read all kinds of books and had quite elaborate and creative child rearing methods. Therefore most spankings do not occur because a parent wants to responsibly teach their child discipline and have happy family but because they are too lazy to look into other methods or too selfish to put too much effort into their kids. Or worse of all they spank their children to blow off some steam. I think that's why many kids who are suffering spankings now develop a lot more damage. It's not the spankings themselves but usually the only parents who resort to them also have all kinds of other issues.

Where I live corporal punishment was out of practice for a very long time. I know my grandmother never was spanked. She was taught in a monastery and they were VERY strict there. But they didn't use corporal punishment. I think it's more because of time. Spankings are a very time efficient way of discipline. Before families were much larger with 5 or 6 being very common. Mothers also had to do all the chores like washing, making food, doing dishes, cleaning the house and everything by hand. They didn't have time to go into lengthy talks. Now families of 4 are already considered big and tech like washing machines, microwave ovens, dishwashers, vacuum cleaners and other things have drastically cut down the time needed. In addition to that most people are also on average richer nowadays so if a child breaks something it can usually be replaced and they have the time to deal with things. Before when people had much less time and money they needed to maintain far more of a tight grip on their children because they couldn't afford mishaps. Also many things were passed down from one generation to the next and so had a lot of sentimental value and were irreplaceable. Today many people buy cheap things and even things costing several hundred dollars are usually replaced within a decade. Interesting. I always thought spanking was a negative form of discipline because it is making clear what the child should NOT do. That positive discipline is giving them rewards, to make sure they will do certain things.

I do wonder, did they make it clear to you why you were spanked? I feel that in discipline with children the punishment itself doesn't matter that much. What matters is being clear on exactly what they did, why they did it, why it was wrong, why the punishment is appropriate, why they can't keep doing this and what they should have done instead. The punishment itself is merely just to give those things weight as otherwise the child will just ignore them.

This bothered me so I actually asked me mom and she greatly questioned why you would spank a child. Waking up in a wet, cold and clammy bed is unpleasant to begin with and so if you don't undo that by being too affectionate the child already suffers for it. If you really feel like it you could have them wash their bedding every time it happens. Making them clean up their own mess. For her at least if the child does something bad the first thing is understanding why they did it. Also fifth grade? Aren't you already 10 at that point? I think a child wetting themselves at age 10 means there is something wrong with them. I do really feel for you if your parents did that while you had no control over it. It feels like they felt spanking was a fix-all solution to every problem rather than actually trying to solve it.

Well my point more is that it all seems to be so all or nothing. Either it's corporal punishment or no discipline whatsoever. I was punished when I truly refused to listen and obey her but those instances were very rare. Usually when I was whining about chores the threat of it's value being halved was enough for me. When I did keep trying to get out of it the reminder mom would give about all the fun things I could have been doing usually made me do the chore. After all it was clear she wasn't going to give up and that whining only made things worse. I usually wanted to do something fun and so mom saying all the fun things I already ruined was a strong motivator. It also not strictly negotiating, my mom was also perfectly capable of being unmovable and if she felt we did earn a punishment she would do it. It's not just that though, it's also region. My parents didn't suffer corporal punishment either. Of all my grandparents only my paternal grandma did and it only was one teacher who did it like 3 times that she can remember. Also I don't remember anyone ever going to the principal for discipline. The deans did all that, the principle rarely directly interacted with the students. I don't know how it's organised in America but here the students are all organised into classes led by a teacher known as a mentor. Each class has a code which is based on the year like class 5E or something. All classes of one year are part of a wing headed by a dean who coordinates the mentors, decides things like trips and large projects. They also talked with all the students on how things went and how well they are on track for the year. In discipline if the teacher couldn't do it you were sent to the dean. The principle usually only came into play when permanent expulsion was considered which the deans can't legally do. Only the principle of the school can expel students and if things went so far that the dean would ask the principle almost always said "yes". The principle usually was busy full time managing the school, making up lessons plans. Denying or approving the plans of the deans, managing the budget, filling out legal documents, solving all kinds of problems that come up, keeping an eye on performances and anything else that came up. They usually didn't even interact much with the teachers as they usually they talked to the deans who then in turn coordinated with the teachers. Being a principle of a school is pretty much the same as being director of a company. Company directors also don't have much direct involvement with the workers, they have subordinates who handled that for them.

That is not good. I mean how can you trust her if she doesn't trust you? Also did she explain exactly why you shouldn't move so much in church? And what about that money? Did she try to trace where you spend it on and why?

That whole idea of discipline this way is just really foreign to me. My dad spend most of his time working so I was raised almost exclusively by my mom. She treated rearing as really a skill and she was not afraid to be firm and punish us though she was against corporal punishment. However she treated bratty kids more as a sign of incompetence by the parents than softness. Spanking is the same as she treated it as lazy parenting. Something you use because you are not willing to put in the effort to understand it better. My mom felt that if you had to resort to spankings it meant you already failed somewhere earlier down the line. When I asked her about it she did say she would respect other parents who felt differently but she prided herself that she could keep everyone under control without needing to do that. Everyone always talks about spankings but that is not the only rearing technique available. I think you should have different consequences for different things. For example making a mess means cleaning it up. If for some reason the child is truly not able to clean their mess up then they need to be given a chore that demands a roughly equal amount of labor. Not playing nicely is best dealt with, with a time-out while they are looking at the others having fun. A technique my mom used for mandatory chores was to have 2 chores in our free days, a big one and a small one. If we whined and complained about the chore it's value would be halved and if we did the chore out of our own initiative it counted as double. So if we did our small chore ourselves we only needed to do another small chore instead of a large one. However if we whined about it then we needed to do another tiny chore as well. Equally so with the large chore, if we whined we needed to do another small one while if we did it ourselves we could skip the small chore altogether. Also mom would make it very clear how much time we wasted whining and also name up several things we could have been doing during that time instead. If we had done something bad that our mom couldn't think up a reason for then she wouldn't do anything until she understood why. She could push pretty hard but she would get our reasoning out of us one way or another. Usually when she did our reasoning was pretty stupid and she would really point that out to us. However in those sessions the emphasis was on the reasoning. We were also allowed to talk back if we did so in a calm manner and what we said made sense. She would listen to backtalk but she wouldn't listen to whining. Punishments are mere a reinforcement to get the kids to pay attention. They shouldn't be the end goal. Punishments with me were very rare. Only when we refused to listen. I remember her also being very transparent in her rearing techniques. Often explaining them to us. After all if we had to explain our actions it was only fair she would have to do so as well.

My mom's solution to that was educational. Swear words often have complex origins and she had a rule that we weren't allowed to use words that we didn't understand. So if she heard us say a bad word she would question us rather we knew what it really meant. With swear words we never did so she educated us on it. That really took all the fun out of it.

Bedwetting with me mostly stopped at age 5. Which is actually older than all of my siblings (I have 3, all of which are younger). Though when I was 8 it suddenly started again which confused my mom greatly. After all why would I wet the bed? It's quite cold and uncomfortable. She eventually bought me pull-ups out of necessity since the mattress was starting to get really damaged. My little brother was still in diapers and my little sister was still wearing pull-ups to bed. However the idea of them laughing at me never even came up. In many stories you see the siblings laughing or trying to use it as blackmail but that thought never even arose. They were mostly uninterested and my second younger sister was really my older sister. She mostly was sharing in mom's confusion. They did install rules like no drinking after 7 and always go to the toilet before bed. She never treated those as punishments and mostly just as annoyances since it meant she had to be involved in my bedtime more. I also didn't like the pull ups because they felt awkward and it took me a while to get used to them. However I did grow to like them and I think this is where my love for diapers originated. The bedwetting went on for around 4 months before disappearing as quickly as it came. We kept pull-ups around for another 2 years in increasing sizes before mom felt confident enough to stop buying them. However the mattress protector was kept all the way until I left the nest. When I turned 15 and got an adult sized bed we also bought a fitting mattress protector. It worked wonders for my dust allergy and was also useful against sweat stains. My point is that with me it was treated as a purely practical problem. The idea of punishment or that it was even humiliating never came up. I mostly treated all the measures as just obnoxious.