Stroller

I'm an adult baby/toddler and always have been I suppose, although I didn't really understand that until I was in my early 30s.  Before that it was a number of unconnected threads.  I first put a nappy on for myself when I was about 7 - just a towel from the bathroom. It took a few years to get out of the binge/guilt/purge cycle and accept myself as I am, but before I was 40 I was comfortable with it, and started to meet other ABs, largely through Hazel Jones' parties - thanks for everything Hazel!

After a marriage and a long-term relationship that each lasted a few years before falling apart I decided I wasn't going into another without telling my partner about it - before any commitments were made.  Being an AB hadn't directly damaged either relationship, but my keeping so much bottled up inside can't have made it easy for either of them.  So, I told one serious girlfriend, who was horrified and that was the end of that.  I told the next, and she took me on anyway.  That was nearly 300 years ago, and we have two grown-up girls.  Although my wife knows about my being an AB - she saw my cot and nursery before I got rid of it when she moved in with me - I volunteered to put being an AB under wraps while we raised a family.  I didn't want to risk anything going wrong, and I didn't want my wife to worry about that either.

I took the opportunity for early retirement from work a few years ago, and I was a house-husband as the kids continued to grow.  Since September 2018 there's just been the two of us here for most of the time, and I no longer keep my baby side restricted to the occasional times I'm alone in the house for a weekend.  I managed it for over 20 years, with the thought that it would end one day, and now that day has come.  I've come out to my wife more, and with her blessing I've been in nappies all day every day since September 2018.  She said she wasn't comfortable with sharing a bed with me if I was in a nappy, so for 18 months I wasn't wearing at night, except when she was away.  In March 2020 she relented, and now I'm in nappies all the time, night and day.  She lets me suckle whenever I want in the night, gives me cuddles, and has got used to me having a dummy in my mouth at night.  It all seems to working out pretty well so far!

What's important for me as an AB?  Nappies, wetting 24/7, lack of control, being cared for.  Messing occasionally, but only when I've got the house to myself for a weekend or more.  My dummy, my teddy, and above all my Mummy - and yes I am calling her Mummy now, and she seems to have accepted being that.  She knows I will snap out of baby to be adult if she needs me to - I don't want to make things harder for her than I have to.

I'm on this forum to share experiences with other ABs and carers, to make my life and theirs better, or more informed and supported anyway.  I'm not looking for partners, just friends and the odd bit of information.  I blog on here as well, just to record my journey as I move my baby side out of the closet again.  It's mainly for me really, but if you want to read it, feel free.  You'll see the occasional references to Binky the dog - a bonkers and now elderly canine who has no more desire to grow up than I have.  Binky is his DD forum name (my real name isn't Stroller either).  He's a springer spaniel mostly, and his nom de plume has been borrowed from a famous literary horse - or so he tells me.