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#1 Zippo

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Posted 20 November 2009 - 03:48 PM

Im sorry if this has been posted previously but i've just noticed on the main DL board (im a DL, not AB) that the majority of DL's appear to be straight. Now me coming from the furry community - this is a new concept almost!

So im just wondering what people's rough idea of what proportion of DL's are gay is?

#2 nappyboymids

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Posted 21 November 2009 - 05:44 AM

To be honest, I have no idea - I'd guess it was pretty much the same as I don't see any obvious reason for lesbians or gay men to be more inclined towards diapers than people who are straight. Conceivably gay men might be more open about it - gay 'culture' tends to be more accepting and upfront about fetishes and varied sexual practices. I suspect that the apparent lack of gay participation here is linked to the fact that there are several gay DL sites around (DL-boy, rupadded, the presently defunct by perhaps-to-return aby etc.) and just as with other groups 'birds of a feather flock together' ...

#3 abrera

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Posted 21 November 2009 - 11:44 AM

it's impossible to tell.

I'm hoping if my Uni gets a fetish soc that we can discuss this (as it will just be the LGBT in attendance)
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#4 depends4me

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Posted 21 November 2009 - 09:33 PM

I get frustrated sometimes at the lack of people who classify themselves as both gay and DL...but I suppose there's really no correlation between the two. It's likely the same as the gay percentage of the non AB/DL population. (Sorry, too lazy right now to look up the number.) Diaper fetishes tend to form during childhood or puberty, while truly understanding one's sexual identity might take another 5-10 years.

#5 Bettypooh

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Posted 22 November 2009 - 05:45 AM

I get frustrated sometimes at the lack of people who classify themselves as both gay and DL...but I suppose there's really no correlation between the two. It's likely the same as the gay percentage of the non AB/DL population. (Sorry, too lazy right now to look up the number.) Diaper fetishes tend to form during childhood or puberty, while truly understanding one's sexual identity might take another 5-10 years.


There are multiple aspects to everyone- gender, sexuality, fetishes, etc- that are interrelated but separate and develop on their own at different times B)
It's the sum of the parts that makes each of us who we are and as long as we strive to avoid harming others we're all good and worthy people :wub:

Like many TG's I once hung out in the GLB community because it is safer, more tolerant of diversity*, and more discreet ;) I can't recall a single instance where there was even a hint of ABDL anywhere in what I saw of it here and in two major cities near here. Mature self-acceptance and free sexual expression seems to be the major emphasis there. Overall I would hazard a guess that we're as rare there as we are in the 'Straight' world, and since their numbers are smaller so will be total number of ABDL Gays :mellow: One thing we do share with them is a very high disdain for anything related to sex with children. We both know that any tolerance of that would destroy whatever gains we have made in the world so we simply cannot go anywhere near there if we wish to keep the freedom we have, small as it may be :thumbsup:

* I hate to say this but in my experience the GLB community also has some of the least tolerant of people in it too- I could never fathom that! More then once I have been verbally assaulted by Gays and Lesbians simply because I was out with a Lesbian and we were happy with each other :( It seems that a few of them feel that diversity is OK only as long as it's their kind of diversity :o Thankfully this too seems proportional compared to the whole-world numbers. Even with that I must say that I never had anything to fear from them physically which is unfortunately not the case in the rest of the world :angry: In that regard I must say that the GLB community has learned something society in general hasn't- and in that they are far better humans than you find in general :(

Good luck to you as you seek, and I think you'll eventually find what you're looking for :D

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#6 DavidMW

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Posted 22 November 2009 - 09:53 PM

I get frustrated sometimes at the lack of people who classify themselves as both gay and DL...but I suppose there's really no correlation between the two.


I'm openly gay and have posted gay-related comments in threads in the main forum without any problems. But most of the time, my being gay or any other aspect of gayness just isn't relevant to the thread; similarly, most posts by straights don't mention the posters' straightness. Most of the topics seem to me to be orientation-indifferent, so I wouldn't make any conclusions about the orientation of the folks who post.

#7 boy ricky

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Posted 23 November 2009 - 01:45 PM

I'm openly gay and have posted gay-related comments in threads in the main forum without any problems. But most of the time, my being gay or any other aspect of gayness just isn't relevant to the thread; similarly, most posts by straights don't mention the posters' straightness. Most of the topics seem to me to be orientation-indifferent, so I wouldn't make any conclusions about the orientation of the folks who post.



Its usually not too hard for me to find Gay DL's. Check their profile. And some other sites too, like Dl-boy.com

#8 Horndog

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Posted 23 January 2010 - 06:34 PM

Its usually not too hard for me to find Gay DL's. Check their profile. And some other sites too, like Dl-boy.com


The only problem is that you have to upload two photos of yourself in diapers in order to qualify for membership at DL-boy.com. Since I'm a privacy nut, I don't like their system very much. Any other sites we should know about?
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#9 nappyboymids

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Posted 24 January 2010 - 02:47 AM

The only problem is that you have to upload two photos of yourself in diapers in order to qualify for membership at DL-boy.com. Since I'm a privacy nut, I don't like their system very much. Any other sites we should know about?


They do, but they don't have to be face pics - you could just pose a diaper shot which, hopefully, wouldn't be too invasive. And, although I don't know how it works technically and if it's effective or not, they have a option in which you can specify that your pictures cannot be downloaded (or downloaded only with your permission, or completely free to download). There's also diaper-bois.com and rupadded.com although personally I prefer dl-boy ...

#10 Aurelius

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Posted 24 January 2010 - 03:01 AM

It does seem that there are somewhat fewer gay DL's. I suppose it's a matter of psychology, but it doesn't really matter. Gay people are far more open minded, so I hardly see it as a concern. They're unlikely to reject the fetish, in my experience. Nobody has categorically rejected it as yet. I consider myself bi, but there are times when I feel asexual, trans or almost exclusively into the fetish and nothing else.

Gender is an important factor. Girls are just innately less kinky usually.
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#11 Horndog

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Posted 25 January 2010 - 02:03 AM

They do, but they don't have to be face pics - you could just pose a diaper shot which, hopefully, wouldn't be too invasive. And, although I don't know how it works technically and if it's effective or not, they have a option in which you can specify that your pictures cannot be downloaded (or downloaded only with your permission, or completely free to download). There's also diaper-bois.com and rupadded.com although personally I prefer dl-boy ...


Why do you prefer DL-boy? More active populace?
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#12 nappyboymids

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Posted 25 January 2010 - 02:23 AM

Why do you prefer DL-boy? More active populace?


Basically, yes - there seem to be more people online at any given time. Also I'm used to the interface, which has just been improved; rupadded is a bit fussy. Diaper-bois is a nice simple interface but you have to pay for certain things - not much, it has to be said. Aby was arguably the busiest and best site but it went down last July and, despite a promise to return within weeks, it's still off-line so that looks like a no-hoper.

#13 Horndog

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Posted 25 January 2010 - 02:28 AM

I just registered on Diaper-Bois. It's a bit of a rip off. I want a free service for crying out loud, no strings attached.
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#14 nappyboymids

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Posted 25 January 2010 - 02:44 AM

I just registered on Diaper-Bois. It's a bit of a rip off. I want a free service for crying out loud, no strings attached.


Try dl-boy - much better - just put up a photo which is 'non-committal' until you feel comfortable ...

#15 JayBaby

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Posted 11 February 2010 - 11:36 PM

It's interesting because on every single AB/TB/DL site i've ever been on in the past 10 years, there has always been a strong gay, and furry sub-communities.

Hmm... hehe

#16 oznappy

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Posted 12 February 2010 - 12:04 PM

I just registered on Diaper-Bois. It's a bit of a rip off. I want a free service for crying out loud, no strings attached.


It used to be free for everything after originally being a pay service.

I think it is unfair of any of us to complain about sites that do have pay services like that, as it is not a professional site and someone is paying out of their own pocket to keep it going.

Rupadded received hate mail when they were down doing a rebuild..again, it is people doing it out of their own pockets. If we do not like anything then we just don't use it

#17 billydydy

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Posted 12 February 2010 - 04:42 PM

It does seem that there are somewhat fewer gay DL's. I suppose it's a matter of psychology, but it doesn't really matter. Gay people are far more open minded, so I hardly see it as a concern. They're unlikely to reject the fetish, in my experience. Nobody has categorically rejected it as yet. I consider myself bi, but there are times when I feel asexual, trans or almost exclusively into the fetish and nothing else.

Gender is an important factor. Girls are just innately less kinky usually.


Pre-Stonewall and also pre-internet gay people had to find each other. Many gay people have had to accept the fact that they were gay and there is a lot of confusion. Some men are grandfathers when they accept the fact and others have said they knew they were gay at 7 yo. I'd say that gay people are more introspective of their sexuality and more used to reaching out to other gay people. I suspect there are a lot more straight AB/DL's out in the world who don't accept they are or are afraid to reach out.

#18 Horndog

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Posted 13 February 2010 - 01:39 AM

I think it is unfair of any of us to complain about sites that do have pay services like that, as it is not a professional site and someone is paying out of their own pocket to keep it going.


Right, but the problem with the site I mentioned previously is that they market themselves as free, but if you register, you notice that some of their features are not accessible unless you pay. It's the deception that gets me.

I will join pay sites that boast a large, active userbase.
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#19 Aurelius

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Posted 16 February 2010 - 11:09 AM

I suspect there are a lot more straight AB/DL's out in the world who don't accept they are or are afraid to reach out.

Well, it's all hearsay and speculation unless we can get some hard data - which is always tricky in social enquiries. Right, though

Getting the fetish itself is very psychological and perhaps even predictable for some. I don't know that much about Gay psychology, but there are a number of (controversial) theories.

I guess time can tell. Every year we find out more about the situation for the fetish. Some very liberated and enlightened times, in an odd way.

In terms of numbers, absolutely more are straight, for certain. But as a matter of proportion, I couldn't say. Keep in mind that just because people are making themselves heard online doesn't mean they are necessarily representative. More likely we're seeing people really into it and people with probably more complicated circumstances (hence the will to discuss it all).
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#20 curiositykilledthecat

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Posted 17 February 2010 - 04:47 PM

gon on fetlife, there's a ton of gay abdl's on there.
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