Reaching One Year of Untraining in 10 Days!

[Veg]

So its as the topics title suggests, in 10 days ill be reaching the one year mark of having been diaper training, or rather unpotty training.

Ive been using my diapers for all peeing (toilet for #2's, though i try to never hold it, go as soon as i feel something and let it come out naturally, i dont do it in my diapers as i dont want to bother family with the smell) and its been great!

 

I pee much mofe frequently then i used to, i habe the urge to go alot more, i pee aroynd 15 times a day, always at least 10, versus my pree training where i peed 2 times a day 3 max.

 

But i still have some concerns. If i just let my bladder be and dont think about it, ill end up holding no matter what. And ive yet to have a ny true accidents that i can recall. Bedwetting or otherwise.

I do have sone post vojd dribble sometimes, but thats about it.

 

I really wish i was farther, especially what with being nearly a year in now. Anyone have any suggestions of how to help things along further? Hypnosis doesnt seem to work on me, been trying that throughout this whole year. And im really just so very tired of being continent still.

Anyone have experience with it takeing a long time?

 

P.s: catheters or stents are not for me, had soem for surgeries in the past, and those hurt more then the actual surgical sight did

[oznl]

I do think that the “12 month guide” is for very many people, wildly optimistic.

In my experience, the only thing that had reliably happened for me after 12 months was that I’d gotten VERY good at peeing in my pants.

It’s possible that I’d had a bedwetting incident or two but it was hard to tell because I was wet anyway when I went to bed.  Incidentally, early on being somewhat-wet when I fell asleep was a prerequisite for any subsequent sleep-wetting incident.  I can recommend you try that.

Now (about 3.5 years in), I’m still continent during the day if I need to be although I need to have a bathroom close by.   For sheer practicality, I need to be diapered for some things (eg: road trips).  There’s been the odd incident where I’ve used my diaper without thinking about it (I’ve felt it getting wet but could not remember deciding to do that) but it’s still rare.

I am however a reasonably regular bedwetter now.  For some reason, bedwetting appeared first.  I no longer have to go to bed wet in order to experience a bedwetting event.  Just last night I woke up at 3am to discover myself just finishing a pee (fortunately in my nappy) which had been dry when I’d gone to bed earlier.

It takes a long time for many of us.

[Kif]

Not necessarily a "long" time for me, but I've had a go at this twice now with success.

First go around, I took two months to achieve bedwetting 4-5 times per week without waking up. 

Second go around, nearly 4 years after that, it took me roughly 6 months to get to nearly (but less than) the same point. 

I'm not sure exactly what the difference could truly have been in those cases, but there are notable things...some different, some the same:

First (faster) Time:

• Married / sleep in same bed as hubby, with a mattress protector and incon pad
• Went in with some urinary urgency (every few hours or so). No issues at night.
• Untrained for both
• Was in cloth diapers at night from nearly the beginning; helped me let go of inhibitions wetting on my side or on my back in bed
• Went in with no expectation of stopping
• Had forgotten about a lot of past trauma; few emotional inhibitions besides the usual e.g. wearing in public, at work, etc
• Used hypnosis lots in the beginning, with focus on the mechanics (going at first urge etc)
• Was largely going into the office and more active
• Pushed fluids, ate largely healthy
• Used timers to remind myself to pee every 15-30 minutes
• Overloaded fluids before bed
• Stopped unexpectedly to begin transition / HRT

Second (slower) Time:

• Married / sleep in same bed as hubby, with a mattress protector and incon pad
• Went in with higher urgency (every hour or less) and some moderate post-void dribbling. No issues at night.
• Untrained for both
• Was in disposables at night until nearly the end (at which point bedwetting picked up more); I didn't quite trust disposables at night as much, even premium ones
• Went in expecting having to stop for gender reaffirming surgery at some point
• Started to recall past traumas / have to deal with them, on top of some of the usual emotional inhibitions (hugely reduced from first time, but fear was still present)
• Used hypnosis (and self-EMDR) lots in the beginning with focus on self acceptance and healing
• Was largely working from home and more sedentary
• Pushed fluids, ate largely healthy
• Used timers to remind myself to pee every 15-30 minutes
• Overloaded fluids at night and before bed
• Stopped expectantly to undergo GRS

Overall, the biggest difference for me between the two was (1) emotional load / focus, (2) trust in my diapers at night, and (3) physical activity levels. Of those, the emotional and diaper-trust parts were the biggest especially with bedwetting; there was a general correlation between my dips in mood and drop in bedwetting, and being able to trust my diapers at night (especially when sharing a bed) helped lots in easing wetting anxiety. But, physical activity level may have also contributed e.g. to how deeply I slept. 

But, I'll also note that in both cases I was able to recover afterwards by going cold-turkey and switching back to "big" undergarments, and the stop was spurred by a notable outside physical and emotional influence. So I think, at least for that time frame, that is a bigger indicator for my experiences that the progress was hugely dependent on emotions and physical habits.

I'm technically 24/7 now, but it's like the second time around in that I expect to have to put a pause to this shortly again. I've not been recording much anything during this period for obvious reasons, but I'll resume that once I am truly able to. And when I go at it again...I hope to have far fewer inhibitions (though, I'll probably still feel some amount of self-doubt / expecting complications and having to put a pause to all this again... I expect for that reason it may go a similar rate to the second go-around).

[Little Sherri]

13 hours ago, oznl said:

It takes a long time for many of us.

I can echo this. I'm just past the three-year mark of living 24/7. Like you, and @oznl, I'm very good at wetting myself anywhere, anytime, and I go at least a couple of times an hour, sometimes a few. Like you, it almost never happens by itself, although I can get into a zone where I stay "relaxed" for a while and void semi-automatically... but those are infrequent, and I have to concentrate a bit on not reverting to my natural "clenched" state, so I'm not labelling that as progress, because if I have to willfully participate, it's not involuntary. There has been the odd occasion where I relaxed to dribble a bit, and then noticed some minutes later via some external stimuli (diaper swelling, an errant stream of liquid), that something is still happening that I don't have any internal feedback on, but that's rare and doesn't last. At night, I try to go to bed at least a bit wet, per Oznl's prescription, and once in a while I wet without waking, at least as far as I can recall, although it's much more common for me to either wake up, let go, and then drift off to sleep while the transfer is in progress, or, to just sleep through the night and wake up needing to pee. My urinary output declines notably while I'm asleep. I have not tried "fluid loading", other than when I drink several IPA's or glasses of wine throughout the evening. Ethanol consumption correlates notably with bedwetting events. 

The idea of being able to lose control in 12 months is, to quote Oz again, wildly optimistic in my opinion. I'm sure it's worked for some, but I think expectations of that magnitude are a road to disappointment and dissatisfaction for many. For me, it's the journey. I might never "get there", but, as long as I'm in diapers on the way, life is a bit more tolerable and interesting.

Congrats on one year! It really is a big milestone. Most of the nerve-wracking firsts have to be plowed through in year one. Early into my fourth year doing this, I'm at the point where I'd have to go skydiving or bull-riding to have a notable "first time while in diapers" moment. 

[DLJeff52]

Looking forward to my one year milestone on November 19, so I'm sure you are thrilled!! It is always the journey, never the end that measures the worth!  Hope you have a celebratory event!  Whether it is one year, two years or more, I'm glad to have all of you along the way!

[Hannah YMS]

I want to echo what @oznl and @Little Sherri said. The 12 month program is wildly optimistic. Thinking about it right now, I can't even remember how long I've been untraining and wearing 24/7. Approaching 2 or 3 years now, either way I'm still continent and nothing is really changing other than the ease at which I'm voiding laying down.

This process takes most of us YEARS, not "year". Don't expect too much moving forward, is my advice.