Help Needed

[uk_DL]

You can see by how long i have been a member that i have been a DL for meny years, started around 2002 and found this site in 2005. Dont post much just read mostly.

Background.

2002-2005 I was single and could wear when i wanted, however never used that time to try long periods of wearing.

2005 - Had a GF who i told who did not accept it we broke up 3 months later

2005-2008 Single could wear when i wanted again however never used that time to try long periods of wearing.

2008-2021 - Been with the same Girl who accepts. From 2010 to 2020 we lived far away from family so could wear for longer periods. think i manged two weeks then joined a Gym which made it hard.

2020 we moved closer to family who we see every week, They come to ours and we do theirs, we also work from home and also have someone work for us. Due to this i am limited to when i can wear.

2021 - We have CCTV and my employee caught me with a nappie on, he is ok with it.

So Here is the problem, I have only knowen that my employee which is also a very close friend knew that i wear nappies. now that he knows, i feel more willing to wear around him but not in his face, look what i am wearing.

My Gf, does not mind me sleeping in them, out in public, or at home. Not really had much of a chat about when we have guests over. never needed to have that chat.

The more restricted i am, the more i want to go 24/7 and not have to hide.

I know for sure my g/f would not want 24/7 due to family.

My worker/friend is also friends with my brother and his family (Wife+Kids)

I had a chat with him and my g/f on Friday, that keep having to move my nappies out of my bedroom cubbord was annoying me.

This came up as my brother wanted to stay at mine with his wife and kids while me and my g/f went out for the evening. They wanted to use our hot tub etc.

at first i said, no as i think my brother would go looking in our bedroom. We had a chat with him and told him to say out out my shit and allowed him to stay while we was out. I was advised to put my nappies in a box incase my broher went looking that it would not be looking im ring in the face.

I even talked about it with my worker/friend about telling my brother about the nappies so i dont have to hide as much.

He thought it was a very bad idea as in my brother would most likely leave the house and stop me being around his kids.

My problem.

Monday to Friday, Working Days, myself, gf and Friend are at our house. my brother or his wife, my g/f mum will pop over sometimes.

Monday to Thursday Evenings, mostly alone. Fridays, and Weekends, mostliky family time.

So you can see my time is somewhat limited and has stated to affect what i used to get out of the nappies. not a sexual way. I used to wear and when i stop i used to get worried that i would leak at night witout a nappy on. that feeing as not happend for a long time.

I have been into nappies since a very young hang and at 5 i was caught using my brothers which would have been 1 at the time.

I so wish life was not like it was and had the freedom i once had when not living so near family.

My options are unless anyone got some suggestions?

1) keep as i am with the limited amount of wearing.

2) stat wearing around my worker/friend as he already knows) that would give me on a good week. Monday to Thursaday 24/4 but may be less if family come over

3) have a chat with g/f say how i feel and that i want more freedom.

4) Tell my g/f i want to try 24/7 for a bit and see how it goes. (when we lived away from family. once when we was out in public, my g/f said i would need to keep some in the car for changes etc. that never happend as i amways wanted until we got home to change. or if we was going away, i would not wear.

option 4, would mean family finding out and what if they refuse to accept me? who is being wrong here. i would not flash it in there faces, the nappies would always be covered etc.

[beallucanb]

Is your brother that straight laced that he would disown you for your fetish?

I'm sure my brother wouldn't care what I do or what I wear, at home or around him.

 

[uk_DL]

18 minutes ago, beallucanb said:

Is your brother that straight laced that he would disown you for your fetish?

I'm sure my brother wouldn't care what I do or what I wear, at home or around him.

 

Not sure my friend thinks that would happen, my g/f I’m sure would object to me doing it in fear of it happening.

this is not sexual for me, I just love the feeling of wearing a nappy and don’t have to worry about finding a loo in public. Night time unless I’m wearing sometimes I have to get up 2 / 3 times to see. 

[Spanky]

Wow, that's a tough situation. 

What if you were to tell your brother that you need them at night for medical reasons? And test the waters that way?

[uk_DL]

7 minutes ago, Spanky said:

Wow, that's a tough situation. 

What if you were to tell your brother that you need them at night for medical reasons? And test the waters that way?

That would be easer to sell as he knows I normally sleep naked and if I fart sometimes statins the bedding of which he noticed now and again if he stays over and comes into our bedroom and the bed not made. He then takes pictures (twat) and teases me with them. 

i did ask my friend if I needed them for medical reasons he thinks it would be différant. 
 

my g/f does have a issue down there as in she does wet her self if she gets up too quick / sneeze or laugh too much. She would wear a nappy if she had a bad cold.

when we moved closer to family, she binned all her supplies as she did not want anyone to find out. Instead she deals with wetting her self maybe 3 to 4 times a month.

 

 

[~Brian~]

@uk_DL

What I would do is to tell your brother that you need them for “medical reasons”. When I did that for several of my friends, they understood wholeheartedly, and they also understood that because of my disability it was hard for me to be as mobile as they used to be.  I also would probably institute the following thing: tell only those people who you trust, or need to know. The fewer people that know of this, probably the better it will be.  Obviously in your house, it will be your decision what you and your girlfriend do. I find that it is easier to keep it between myself and the people I trust, and the people I work with, because they already know anyway. I was unfortunately “outed” by one of my contractors that work with me. When that happened, I ended up taking care of that by talking to my doctor and several of my support team. I told them that it did not matter one way or the other, and no one should know what’s going on other than my medical team and the people I work with.

that’s why I say in your house you should be the one to decide who knows what.  If you can work from home, and your job allows it, that is awesome. You should be the one to decide how you handle incontinence issues, or accidents, or whatever happens. You should not be worried about what happened, because as long as you are not parading around in your underwear throughout the entire house, for people to see on a CCV monitor then I don’t think it would be a big deal.  If your boss already knows, and he’s accepting of it, Then that is awesome. Hopefully your brother is very understanding of the situation, and would not end up “outing you” to someone whom you do not want him to tell. It is always been my feeling that the only people that need to know are the ones that work with me, or the ones that deal with me on a daily basis. Otherwise, all that is is a bunch of fodder if someone can use against you if they find out about it. The reason why I disclosed to my colleagues is because I was outed by this contractor, who threatened to go tell whole bunch of people who didn’t seem to have the common courtesy to keep it a secret. When you are dealing with a “professional organization“ they have a duty and responsibility to keep information that is on a need to know basis exactly that.

if you believe there is an issue with people that are coming into your house that you are afraid someone will find out, then I would make sure that you are covered appropriately when you are dealing with those individuals when they are guests in your house. With regard to your sleeping quarters, and the way you handle things in your house, that is your business, and as far as I can tell anyone who doesn’t like that idea, well it’s your house. It would be like me trying to tell my father or my mother how to do something in their house. Since they pay the bills, they can decide what they’re gonna do, what they’re going to allow, and all of that. I’m not going to get into any of that because it’s none of my business. The only time it becomes my business, is if someone was in here trying to tell me what I should do or what I should not do, and it was my choice.

If you feel that it is appropriate for you to wear diapers, for any reason, for any amount of time, that is your decision. It is always easier in my opinion to wear a diaper then it would be to make a mess all over your sheets, and not have a dry bed. Wearing diapers would be helpful in those situations where you may not have control, because you are a heavy sleeper or because you are incontinent.

as many people here on DD know:  I support the decision of anyone who decides that the best thing for them to do is wear some “protection“ you should not feel guilty if you decide that you wish to do that, and your girlfriend should not feel guilty if she decides to do the same. Wearing a diaper is no different than wearing a piece of absorbent underwear, and in most cases, it is more convenient to use a diaper then it would be to have to wash a whole bunch of sheets and blankets. Of course, you may have to wash sheets and blankets every once in a while, but as long as you’re able to keep yourself dry, or have diapers and an appropriate amount of protection, you should be OK. Do not worry about what anybody else says, if you think it’s appropriate, or your girlfriend thinks it’s appropriate for herself, and that is what you believe, and no one should tell you otherwise. I would think that your brother would support you either direction, and your boss well, that’s awesome that he doesn’t have a problem with it, but as I say no one outside of your “circle“ that you run with should be aware of your use of diapers unless you deem appropriate. The fewer people that know of this the better, and if someone else finds out about it, then so be it.

Hopefully,  my advice is Helpful to you!
 

Brian

[uk_DL]

5 hours ago, ~Brian~ said:

@uk_DL

What I would do is to tell your brother that you need them for “medical reasons”. When I did that for several of my friends, they understood wholeheartedly, and they also understood that because of my disability it was hard for me to be as mobile as they used to be.  I also would probably institute the following thing: tell only those people who you trust, or need to know. The fewer people that know of this, probably the better it will be.  Obviously in your house, it will be your decision what you and your girlfriend do. I find that it is easier to keep it between myself and the people I trust, and the people I work with, because they already know anyway. I was unfortunately “outed” by one of my contractors that work with me. When that happened, I ended up taking care of that by talking to my doctor and several of my support team. I told them that it did not matter one way or the other, and no one should know what’s going on other than my medical team and the people I work with.

that’s why I say in your house you should be the one to decide who knows what.  If you can work from home, and your job allows it, that is awesome. You should be the one to decide how you handle incontinence issues, or accidents, or whatever happens. You should not be worried about what happened, because as long as you are not parading around in your underwear throughout the entire house, for people to see on a CCV monitor then I don’t think it would be a big deal.  If your boss already knows, and he’s accepting of it, Then that is awesome. Hopefully your brother is very understanding of the situation, and would not end up “outing you” to someone whom you do not want him to tell. It is always been my feeling that the only people that need to know are the ones that work with me, or the ones that deal with me on a daily basis. Otherwise, all that is is a bunch of fodder if someone can use against you if they find out about it. The reason why I disclosed to my colleagues is because I was outed by this contractor, who threatened to go tell whole bunch of people who didn’t seem to have the common courtesy to keep it a secret. When you are dealing with a “professional organization“ they have a duty and responsibility to keep information that is on a need to know basis exactly that.

if you believe there is an issue with people that are coming into your house that you are afraid someone will find out, then I would make sure that you are covered appropriately when you are dealing with those individuals when they are guests in your house. With regard to your sleeping quarters, and the way you handle things in your house, that is your business, and as far as I can tell anyone who doesn’t like that idea, well it’s your house. It would be like me trying to tell my father or my mother how to do something in their house. Since they pay the bills, they can decide what they’re gonna do, what they’re going to allow, and all of that. I’m not going to get into any of that because it’s none of my business. The only time it becomes my business, is if someone was in here trying to tell me what I should do or what I should not do, and it was my choice.

If you feel that it is appropriate for you to wear diapers, for any reason, for any amount of time, that is your decision. It is always easier in my opinion to wear a diaper then it would be to make a mess all over your sheets, and not have a dry bed. Wearing diapers would be helpful in those situations where you may not have control, because you are a heavy sleeper or because you are incontinent.

as many people here on DD know:  I support the decision of anyone who decides that the best thing for them to do is wear some “protection“ you should not feel guilty if you decide that you wish to do that, and your girlfriend should not feel guilty if she decides to do the same. Wearing a diaper is no different than wearing a piece of absorbent underwear, and in most cases, it is more convenient to use a diaper then it would be to have to wash a whole bunch of sheets and blankets. Of course, you may have to wash sheets and blankets every once in a while, but as long as you’re able to keep yourself dry, or have diapers and an appropriate amount of protection, you should be OK. Do not worry about what anybody else says, if you think it’s appropriate, or your girlfriend thinks it’s appropriate for herself, and that is what you believe, and no one should tell you otherwise. I would think that your brother would support you either direction, and your boss well, that’s awesome that he doesn’t have a problem with it, but as I say no one outside of your “circle“ that you run with should be aware of your use of diapers unless you deem appropriate. The fewer people that know of this the better, and if someone else finds out about it, then so be it.

Hopefully,  my advice is Helpful to you!
 

Brian

 

Thanks Brian for the response. I am my boss so i can do what i like in that regard.

I don't have a medicial condition so would be lieing of which if came out later it was a lie then would be more of an issue I suspect.

I did have a more of a issue when i was around 14-15 when i had to go loo every 15 min and almost jumpted out of a moving car due to the need to pee. That cleared up on its own.

When i cleen my teeth or when i have finished going wee, i do still pass a few dribbles sometimes which then makes a wet patch on my boxers.

I think i will have a chat with my g/f about my desires and see if she will support it, i doubt she would unlees i actually had a need.

My brother came over friday and asked us to look after his kids until Sunday (today) so i have not been able to wear.

I really do not like hiding as i cant then do what i like etc.

 

[Spanky]

@uk_DL, did your brother know about your issue in your early teens? If so, that would make it an even easier way to sell needing diapers now.

As for dribbling right after peeing, I'd say that's pretty common. My tighty whiteys often have a little yellow spot in the front by the end of the day. 

My thermal underwear really make it hard to get all the urine out before tucking the little man back in the fly. I try and try but end up many times with a little trickle running down one ove my legs. It's just the way those thermals are cut, or sown in the fly. Going out hunting,  diapered is very convenient. 

[uk_DL]

7 minutes ago, Spanky said:

@uk_DL, did your brother know about your issue in your early teens? If so, that would make it an even easier way to sell needing diapers now.

As for dribbling right after peeing, I'd say that's pretty common. My tighty whiteys often have a little yellow spot in the front by the end of the day. 

My thermal underwear really make it hard to get all the urine out before tucking the little man back in the fly. I try and try but end up many times with a little trickle running down one ove my legs. It's just the way those thermals are cut, or sown in the fly. Going out hunting,  diapered is very convenient. 

Yes it would have been hard for him not to know. I had to have a taxi pick me up to and from School as the bus took too long of which i could not wait.

I just told my g/f that i want to wear more often and for longer periods. She is actually ok with that, but does not think it would be a good idea telling my brother.

I need to have more chats about that.

[rusty pins]

My take?  Lots of people wish they could wear more than they do.  It all depends on your situation or the situations you put yourself into.  Live alone and you can do as you please.  Live with someone else and that adds an extra element.  If they are cool about it and don't care, it's not a factor.  If they do care in some situations and not others, that has just cut your wearing down some.  Add family or friends staying with you.  That could cut it down even more if you don't want them to know.  On the other hand, it is your house not theirs so if they don't like it, tell them to be on their way.  Doing this could cause a riff between you and family that you may not want, just because you want to wear diapers more often that you already do.  keep in mind it won't just be a brother or one family member you are telling to leave because of your diapers.  The word will spread from him to other family members whether you tell him openly about your diapers or you point him towards the door.  Would you want that?  Take the times he asks you to watch his kids.  Now your wearing opportunity has decreased even more.  Don't take any chance wearing diapers around kids.

So, what's more important to you?  Being mindful and considerate of the people around you and their feelings, or your desires to wear more and more than you already do?  Worker already knows.  GF already is OK with you wearing most of the time.  Those are big pluses.  Bro won't always be over at your place and you can set some simple rules now that you are closer to family.  No dropping by unannounced.  Call first.  That's only courteous on their part.  It's not so bad to put the diapers aside for a day when around your own family or watching your niece and nephew.  I'd never want my fetish to be so controlling that I can't wait for my own family or friends to leave so I can get back into my diapers.  I can curb my fetish desires long enough to enjoy, and that's the key word, enjoy spending time with friends and family.

I've said many times that we should be in control of our fetish.  If we get to the point where we stop doing things with friends or family because we would rather stay home in our diapers, then the fetish is controlling us instead of the other way.  Keep in mind that if you start wearing all the time, you will get so used to it and maybe start having actual control issues that when there comes those times and situations where you just can't be in a diaper, it may be extremely hard if not impossible for you to go without wearing one after all the time being in them so much.  I say take what you already have and don't get so greedy you want it all.  Curbing our desires now and then is not a bad thing and makes us stronger as a person.  It helps children learn they can't always get what they want, even if they throw a tantrum.  Those parents who indulge their child's every want end up with spoiled and selfish kids whom they often support later in life while they do as they please, play games all day and don't get a job.  Just saying.

[uk_DL]

43 minutes ago, rusty pins said:

My take?  Lots of people wish they could wear more than they do.  It all depends on your situation or the situations you put yourself into.  Live alone and you can do as you please.  Live with someone else and that adds an extra element.  If they are cool about it and don't care, it's not a factor.  If they do care in some situations and not others, that has just cut your wearing down some.  Add family or friends staying with you.  That could cut it down even more if you don't want them to know.  On the other hand, it is your house not theirs so if they don't like it, tell them to be on their way.  Doing this could cause a riff between you and family that you may not want, just because you want to wear diapers more often that you already do.  keep in mind it won't just be a brother or one family member you are telling to leave because of your diapers.  The word will spread from him to other family members whether you tell him openly about your diapers or you point him towards the door.  Would you want that?  Take the times he asks you to watch his kids.  Now your wearing opportunity has decreased even more.  Don't take any chance wearing diapers around kids.

So, what's more important to you?  Being mindful and considerate of the people around you and their feelings, or your desires to wear more and more than you already do?  Worker already knows.  GF already is OK with you wearing most of the time.  Those are big pluses.  Bro won't always be over at your place and you can set some simple rules now that you are closer to family.  No dropping by unannounced.  Call first.  That's only courteous on their part.  It's not so bad to put the diapers aside for a day when around your own family or watching your niece and nephew.  I'd never want my fetish to be so controlling that I can't wait for my own family or friends to leave so I can get back into my diapers.  I can curb my fetish desires long enough to enjoy, and that's the key word, enjoy spending time with friends and family.

I've said many times that we should be in control of our fetish.  If we get to the point where we stop doing things with friends or family because we would rather stay home in our diapers, then the fetish is controlling us instead of the other way.  Keep in mind that if you start wearing all the time, you will get so used to it and maybe start having actual control issues that when there comes those times and situations where you just can't be in a diaper, it may be extremely hard if not impossible for you to go without wearing one after all the time being in them so much.  I say take what you already have and don't get so greedy you want it all.  Curbing our desires now and then is not a bad thing and makes us stronger as a person.  It helps children learn they can't always get what they want, even if they throw a tantrum.  Those parents who indulge their child's every want end up with spoiled and selfish kids whom they often support later in life while they do as they please, play games all day and don't get a job.  Just saying.

Hi,

Thank you for your response.

To me there is nothing sexual in the nappies, its more of a comfort thing, I am finding that when im not wearing that i am clenching more and when wearing i relax more.

I just want the ability to use where and when i want, if thats 24/7 or a week at a time. My g/f said when we was in essex (away from family, i would go like a month with wearing near all the time and then stop for a couple of months and then come back to the nappies again. I think because i feel more restricted i'm not reaching that point where i feel within myslef that i have had enough for a bit and want a break for a bit.

[Spanky]

You describe the classic binge purge cycle that a lot of us go through.   We get the urge to be diapered all the time, for a period of time and then it goes away for a while. 

Working from home with a GF who is supportive is probably both a blessing and a curse.   My diaper time is limited to times that I'm home alone.  I  think that it keeps me more in check.

I understand that it must be quite difficult for you because you basically have to scale back quite a bit,  from being able to wear 24/7 without an issue. 

I'd suggest that maybe you just try wearing them to bed at night as a compromise.   If you really have to wear them during the day to satisfy your needs,  wear clothes that hide them very well. 

And if you're ever caught,  run with that story that you're having issues like you did when you were in your teens. 

And, like Rustypins said,  be careful,  because you can actually cause yourself issues if you wear them too much.  You could start to lose some control.  Your bladder could shrink meaning more frequent bathroom visits when you're not in your diapers.

Only you know your family.  I hope that whatever decision you go with works out well for you. 

[uk_DL]

She in fine with me wearing around her and to bed, she would prefer me not to wear when my brother is around. He is into mma and always try’s to get me in head locks etc so does have its risks of him finding out unless we are ok with that. I want to come out with it to make it easer for me. I’ll have to work on it abit more to try get her support to tell my brother.