Historical Inaccuracies (Completed)

[DiaperedPrince]

I like what you've done with the story, and something time-travel-esque really doesn't have to be perfectly logical. But out of pure logic:

If it's like Inception (in that it's a virtual reality and not actually going back to some previous moment in time), it would make sense for her to be able to mix-and-match memories, but not find out weird things about Tim without him being actively connected to the machine as well

If it's actually going back into a previous moment in time, I can understand the lack of causality problems and the finding out new things about people in the past, but not be able to create a new memory by mixing and matching distinct ones, since that wouldn't be a moment in time. UNLESS...

Now that I think about it more the second option is viable if her consciousness went to an alternate timeline (not her own). Yeah I guess that works.

Either way this is still a really good story. When are you posting the next chapter? How much have you written?

[TheUnknownAuthor]

4 minutes ago, DiaperedPrince said:

I like what you've done with the story, and something time-travel-esque really doesn't have to be perfectly logical. But out of pure logic:

If it's like Inception (in that it's a virtual reality and not actually going back to some previous moment in time), it would make sense for her to be able to mix-and-match memories, but not find out weird things about Tim without him being actively connected to the machine as well

If it's actually going back into a previous moment in time, I can understand the lack of causality problems and the finding out new things about people in the past, but not be able to create a new memory by mixing and matching distinct ones, since that wouldn't be a moment in time. UNLESS...

Now that I think about it more the second option is viable if her consciousness went to an alternate timeline (not her own). Yeah I guess that works.

Either way this is still a really good story. When are you posting the next chapter? How much have you written?

So, the thing is that this is not a time travel story, I know I said that before and the characters said that before, but then I had things play out that made it seem like time travel, but I am one thousand percent serious when I say that there is no time travel in this story. Rather than speak on what's happening, I'm going to pose a question and see where that leads you: Why did we switch narrators mid story? We started with Tim and now we're seeing things from Caronlina's perspective...interesting...or not, maybe not...

I'm done with the next chapter and it's going to make things so much more confusing, but hopefully interesting. I tweaked a few things after I responded to you earlier, because I thought about what I was doing and where things were going and realized that my initial plans were going to work out fine but just to cover my bases I cleared up some wording, nothing major. I CAN post it today, but that would mean the next chapter won't be up until the end of next week sometime and given the nature of the coming chapter I don't envy anyone that's eager to continue reading it for having to wait. Today is my last day off before work starts back up again and that means Thursday is the earliest I'd post the next chapter if I wait to do so. Wait or just go today? I'm easy either way.

 

[DiaperedPrince]

 

1 hour ago, TheUnknownAuthor said:

So, the thing is that this is not a time travel story, I know I said that before and the characters said that before, but then I had things play out that made it seem like time travel, but I am one thousand percent serious when I say that there is no time travel in this story.

I see, guess this is the Inception version then.

1 hour ago, TheUnknownAuthor said:

Why did we switch narrators mid story? We started with Tim and now we're seeing things from Caronlina's perspective...interesting...or not, maybe not...

We started with Tim to introduce his relationships with Carolina, Katie and Lina, and to keep Carolina's multiple tests a secret from the reader until a later chapter, which is a brilliant plot device and keeps both tension and plot going. We switch to Carolina because Tim isn't with her anymore, and all he's doing is tying up loose ends to come back to the baby, so in an ABDL story following Tim and video calls and monologues would be boring, so we follow Lina instead as she makes a mistake and goes from adult baby to just baby. Plus following just one person limits the story more than following both perspectives.

1 hour ago, TheUnknownAuthor said:

Wait or just go today? I'm easy either way.

As a reader I'd say wait a bit to not torment us with a bigger cliffhanger.

As an author my advice is have a buffer of (at least 3-5) chapters between writing and release and try not to post chapters immediately after writing them, the reason being you get to edit everything from syntax to plot in previous chapters and even add things like foreshadowing based on 'future' chapters. This ties chapters together much more cohesively, and makes a serial release much more like a fully polished and edited book. Having a buffer also comes with the added bonus of being able to release multiple chapters together if you'd like, upon completion of the work. What I did with my story was:

1. Write a full chapter
2. Read it over and edit it
3. Send it to beta testers to read and get their feedback
4. Edit based on their feedback
5. Repeat 1-4 for the whole Part (1/3) that I'm releasing, editing previous chapters some more as new foreshadowing or things like that come up - the entire part is now finished before I start posting
6. Before releasing each chapter (weekly) read it and edit it one more time to make sure I like it based on what I've written after it
7. Post it

It took me some 3 months to write Part 1, and roughly the same amount of time to post it on a weekly schedule, but most people write a lot faster than I did so you'll probably have a more accelerated schedule.

[TheUnknownAuthor]

7 minutes ago, DiaperedPrince said:

 

I see, guess this is the Inception version then.

We started with Tim to introduce his relationships with Carolina, Katie and Lina, and to keep Carolina's multiple tests a secret from the reader until a later chapter, which is a brilliant plot device and keeps both tension and plot going. We switch to Carolina because Tim isn't with her anymore, and all he's doing is tying up loose ends to come back to the baby, so in an ABDL story following Tim and video calls and monologues would be boring, so we follow Lina instead as she makes a mistake and goes from adult baby to just baby. Plus following just one person limits the story more than following both perspectives.

As a reader I'd say wait a bit to not torment us with a bigger cliffhanger.

As an author my advice is have a buffer of (at least 3-5) chapters between writing and release and try not to post chapters immediately after writing them, the reason being you get to edit everything from syntax to plot in previous chapters and even add things like foreshadowing based on 'future' chapters. This ties chapters together much more cohesively, and makes a serial release much more like a fully polished and edited book. Having a buffer also comes with the added bonus of being able to release multiple chapters together if you'd like, upon completion of the work. What I did with my story was:

1. Write a full chapter
2. Read it over and edit it
3. Send it to beta testers to read and get their feedback
4. Edit based on their feedback
5. Repeat 1-4 for the whole Part (1/3) that I'm releasing, editing previous chapters some more as new foreshadowing or things like that come up - the entire part is now finished before I start posting
6. Before releasing each chapter (weekly) read it and edit it one more time to make sure I like it based on what I've written after it
7. Post it

It took me some 3 months to write Part 1, and roughly the same amount of time to post it on a weekly schedule, but most people write a lot faster than I did so you'll probably have a more accelerated schedule.

God, you're so much more organized and diligent than I am. I'm juggling two stories right now and alternate working on them on my days off and post them immediately after I finish writing them unless I've already done a post for that story that week, unless it gets buried to another page and then I bump it with a new chapter.

I tend to get anxious if I sit on something for extended periods of time, so I tend to write and post the same day or close to so I'm not over analyzing things. Not the smartest or most efficient way of doing things, but I never said I was smart or efficient.

I'll post the next chapter next week then and see how everyone feels after the dust settles from that. Thanks for the tips and feedback, I appreciate it!

 

[TheUnknownAuthor]

VIII

“Jumbled”

I opened my eyes slowly and regretted it immediately, the light in the room stabbing through my eyes into my brain with the searing fire of, well, the Sun. My vision was blurry and I struggled to focus, blinking repeatedly as I winced and lifted my hand to shield my eyes. Dark blobs filled my vision, a cacophony of overlapping sounds and voices rushing into my mind rather than my ears, some familiar and others not.

I managed to get onto all fours and try and get up onto my feet from there, finding my muscles to be practically liquid, betraying me the instant I tried to get up from my crawling position. I heard snickering, building into a giggle and then into a full blown, uproarious laugh. Though I was alone in the lab and it was just a sound, I was sure I heard malicious intent behind it.

I heard clicking, the kind of echoing clack that comes from high heels on the floor of a courthouse hallway, bouncing off of the walls and ceiling to sound like it was coming from everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

“Who’s there?!” I called out, squinting to try and focus my vision on the dark blobs that wiggled and jiggled just out of my ability to make them clearer.

“Baby.” the voice that came from whoever was walking around and laughing said, producing a sound that was something between a choked wheeze and that thing that kids sometimes do where they talk while sucking in their breath and it sent a chill down my spine when I heard it. The word stretched on for several seconds, drawing out each syllable until I could hear a small rattle in the vocal chords by the time it finished speaking.

“Who the fuck is here?!” I screamed, my voice sounding far less intimidating than I was trying for, coming out more on the verge of terrified tears.

Click. Click. Click. The steps came closer.

My vision cleared enough for me to make out a feminine shape, a dress of some kind stopping just above the high heels I’d been hearing.

“I don’t know how you got in here, but if you don’t leave I’m calling the cops!” I shouted, reaching for my phone beside me and finding thick shag carpeting instead, making me look down to see that the floor I was on wasn’t the floor of my lab.

Click. Click. Click. The steps came closer.

“Disgusting.” the voice said, the distortion faded to allow the feminine nature of it to be heard more clearly.

I felt my stomach lurch as I recognized the voice. “Mama?” I asked, my voice coming out small like that of a child.

She was standing in front of me looking down, hands on hips, her face a blur that wiggled like the blobs I’d been seeing before. I smelled her perfume, the flowery scent with a hint of citrus that made her hugs seem more soothing when I was little. I could see now that she was wearing an outfit similar to that of a 1950’s housewife, apron tied around the waist over her powder blue dress, white high heels tapping impatiently before me.

The distortion returned to her voice, amplified by several octaves, making me cover my ears and cry out in pain. From the corner of my eye I another blurry figure appear and the disjointed sound of what I perceived to be laughter came again, this time at a higher pitch than the figure in front of me had produced. I squinted to try and bring the second figure into focus, managing to barely make out that it was another feminine form, though shorter and thinner than the first. The not quite laughter but obviously intended to be laughter filled my mind, bringing a headache and an overwhelming feeling of dizziness that I turned and tried to crawl away to rid myself of by putting distance between us.

The shag carpeting between my fingers dissolved a few feet away from where I started and was replaced by the cool, slick feeling of linoleum. As I looked down saw the floor and recognized it as the kitchen floor of the house I grew up in, the burnt umber hue with flecks of black and cream in it that always made it look kind of dirty even when it was freshly mopped.

Another distorted voice came from behind me, the words garbled into the asphyxiated wheezing sound that these things made, though this one was decidedly male in it’s deeper timber. The lighter, more feminine voice that had come just before I’d crawled away began after it, they were talking to one another. I turned to look over my shoulder and saw the two figures standing in what looked to be an amalgamation of the living room of the house I grew up in and my lab, the house parts faded like an old photograph and the lab parts seeming to be almost superimposed over them in a brighter, but almost transparent way as though they were laid on top of one another like an overhead projector was being used to show both at the same time.

“...diapers.” the male voice said after several unintelligible sounds.

The female figure stood in front of the male figure and extended its arm to the male’s shoulder and made a series of sounds of its own ending with “daddy?”.

The male figure’s head jostled, the features still a blur as though someone had painted these people and smeared a finger over the faces. He reached out and picked the female figure up and they embraced before they merged entirely and melted into the floor, the room they’d inhabited evaporating as they did leaving me staring at nothing, my eyes straining to find something in the inky darkness left behind.

“Lina!” came Tim’s voice, bring my lab back around me between blinks, the floor beneath me caked and smeared with piss, shit, and vomit as I lay beside my phone once more.

I groaned. “Daddy?” I asked weakly, pawing at the black rectangle beside me.

I heard a quiet pair of voices somewhere behind me and rolled over slowly. Where my lab should’ve been was now a tunnel, devoid of light save for an almost pinpoint of dimness miles ahead, moving closer as though I were driving toward it. The dimness grew slightly brighter the closer it got to me or I got to it, and I began to see two figures once again, their distorted voices engaged in an awful sounding clash of choked wheezes and whines, my mind registering it as an argument as they got close enough for me to make out that I was looking at the backs of their heads and what I’d believed to be their bodies were just dark forms without movement as the previous forms had been, they were sitting in front of me.

“Lina!” Tim’s voice called out again making me roll back over.

My lab and phone were gone, replaced by a vast room that looked like it had been created in watercolor, the features of the room muddled and fuzzy. I heard crying, one person and then two and then four and it grew exponentially from their until a cacophony of anguished sobs overlapped in my mind until the sound lost all meaning and just became noise, like static on a television.

Click. Click. Click. The high heels approached.

The sound the woman made was obviously angry, but also hysterical with what I felt was sorrow, not that anything could’ve been gleaned from the lack of words, but my mind and heart felt anguish as she droned on at or near me, my eyes still unable to make anything out about her beyond some of her outfit.

“I can’t understand you!” I cried out pleadingly, wishing she would make sense.

Click. Click. Click. The high heels receded, taking with them the watercolor expanse they inhabited.

The soft scent of baby powder filled my nose and I felt something moving me onto my back, realizing as I looked up that they were hands, the thin fingers resting on my knees connected to nothing more than the ether around me for a moment until the rest of the figure formed from them to become the feminine figure I’d seen with the male one from my place in the kitchen.

“Poor baby.” the young woman’s voice said, her tone pitying and sympathetic.

I tried desperately to make out her face but every time I got close to doing so there was a glint of light and all the progress I’d managed to make was reset, repeating a dozen times in rapid succession until I felt her parting my legs and heard the rip of the tapes of my diaper.

“Please, I don’t understand what’s happening, who are you?!” I cried out.

I felt her hands working between my legs, clinical and efficient but with something else, a warmth as though she were making sure to impart love where possible as she cared for me, like Tim did.

The glint of light filled my vision as I stared up into the swirling void that was her face and as the brightness cleared I could hear her crying, her voice returned to the unintelligible sounds I’d grown accustomed to hearing, she was frightened and quiet, and suddenly I felt a deep sense of sadness and began to cry, trying to reach up to wipe the tears from my eyes but finding my arms immobilized by some unseen force.

“What’s wrong, what’s happening?!” I called out to her.

A bloodcurdling scream filled my mind and everything went dark and my heart raced and my breath came out in shallow, ragged gasps and pants as my lab returned and I saw my phone beside me once more.

“Daddy, I don’t know what’s happening!” I bawled.

The black rectangle was dark and silent.

I reached out for it and pulled it closer to me, squeezing it to press the power button on the side with no result making me realize that whatever was happening to me had been going on long enough for my half charged phone to now be completely dead. I dropped it to the floor with a sigh and once again tried to roll onto my side to try and get up, making it to all fours once more, or for the first time, my sense of what was real and what wasn’t completely shot at this point. I rose slowly, wincing at the throbbing in my head and the severe discomfort in my diaper area and braced myself against the nearest wall as I waited for the room to stop spinning.

I plugged my phone in and shambled slowly to the bathroom, using every wall and piece of furniture I came into contact with to keep my balance until I reached my destination and turned on the faucet in the tub before gingerly removing my leaking, disgusting diaper, doing the best I could to clean myself up enough to finally lower myself into the tub, whimpering at the sting of the hot water on my diaper rash irritated flesh.

“What the fuck was all of that?” I wondered to myself as I plugged the drain and let the warm water slowly envelope my body. I didn’t want to think about any of it, afraid that doing so would bring the awful visions back, but at the same time I couldn’t stop thinking about them, wanting so desperately to fit the pieces together to have them make sense, if any sense could be made of them. I closed my eyes and sighed as I gently massaged my aching head.

The young girl’s voice from earlier broke the silence in the bathroom. “Such naughty language for such a little girl.” she chided in mock disappointment, her tone playful, a smile in her voice.

My eyes shot open and my body jerked in surprise sending water splashing out onto the floor as I stared up at her.

She shook her head softly. “Leaking all over the place as always.” she said, bending down to mop up the water with a towel that she then folded to kneel on beside the tub.

I stared at her, blinking and rubbing my eyes like a disbelieving cartoon character.

“What are you doing taking a bath by yourself anyway?” she asked, reaching into the water for the washcloth, bringing it up and wringing it out as she brought it around behind me and began to lightly rub my shoulders and neck with it. “I thought Baby Lina was too little for big girl things.” she cooed, smiling at me widely, her braces glinting softly in the florescent light of the bathroom.

I swallowed hard and felt myself peeing beneath the water as I took in her features. Her green eyes looked at me with warmth and love, her auburn hair fell to just above her shoulders as her arm moved behind me to gently clean my body. She was absolutely beautiful, just as Tim had described, looking enough like me to make me feel a little jealous of his choosing of her when he had me. “Katie?” I asked.

She smiled and nodded. “Yes, sweetie?” she asked.

I shook my head. “No, I mean, that’s you’re name, right?” I clarified.

She chuckled and tussled my hair playfully. “Can you spell, ‘Katie’, sweetie?” she asked, talking to me as though I were a small child still learning my letters.

“How are you here?” I asked. “How am I seeing you?” I clarified, realizing that she wasn’t there but was just another of whatever I’d experienced earlier.

She pouted. “Is Baby Lina asking where people come from?” she asked. “Don’t you know about the stork?” she teased, reaching out to tickle my tummy.

I wiggled away from her thin fingers, the same fingers that had changed me earlier and the same tone of voice that I’d heard talking to the male figure. “It was Tim!” I exclaimed.

She shook her head. “No, baby, Tim isn’t the stork.” she said. “Tim is-” she blushed and hid a smile. “Tim is my very good friend, remember.” she said.

I sighed. “I know that Tim is, was your boyfriend or Daddy or whatever, but you’re dead and none of this is real.” I told her.

If she was listening or understood me, she didn’t show it. “C’mon, Baby Lina, it’s getting close to bedtime.” she said, reaching down beneath the water to unplug the drain.

“Katie!” came the older woman’s voice, the voice of my mother.

Katie turned her head. “Yeah!” she called out.

“Can you help Lina out of the tub, it’s almost her bedtime!” my mother called out.

Katie smiled at me and winked. “Already on it, mom!” she called out.

My mouth hung open as I stared at her, my mind swirling.

She reached out and gently closed my mouth with her hand before leaning forward and kissing my forehead. “You’ll catch flies if you keep your mouth open like that, sweetie.” she said with a smile.

“Why did you call her ‘mom’?” I asked.

The space where Katie had been was empty after I blinked, the tub gurgling softly as the last of the water flowed down the drain leaving me wet and cold and confused.

To Be Continued...

[Sarah Penguin]

[TheUnknownAuthor]

22 hours ago, Sarah Penguin said:

?

[Sarah Penguin]

On 12/11/2021 at 10:25 AM, TheUnknownAuthor said:

?

Gives you 5 demerits for not breaking the time stream.

[TheUnknownAuthor]

11 hours ago, Sarah Penguin said:

Gives you 5 demerits for not breaking the time stream.

I feel I should get reduced demerits for breaking someone's brain though, I'm sure the human brain is more complicated than the silly old time stream. Also, since the story doesn't have time travel I was at a severe disadvantage to even access the time stream to break it...

[Sarah Penguin]

6 hours ago, TheUnknownAuthor said:

I feel I should get reduced demerits for breaking someone's brain though, I'm sure the human brain is more complicated than the silly old time stream. Also, since the story doesn't have time travel I was at a severe disadvantage to even access the time stream to break it...

Nope. Your story has  forward time travel. in it

[TheUnknownAuthor]

33 minutes ago, Sarah Penguin said:

Nope. Your story has  forward time travel. in it

...tough but fair.

[TheUnknownAuthor]

IX

“Haunted”

“Katie?!” I called out after getting out of the tub and wrapping myself in my towel. I padded to the bathroom door and peaked out into the lab, nothing altered or acting insane as it had before. I stepped through the doorway and looked around, “You still here?” I called out, “You crazy ghost bitch.” I added under my breath.

The lab was silent and as it always was, unkempt but impressive, nothing seeming to be out of place and no long dead girls roaming around.

I sighed and took off my towel as I neared the bed and made quick work of diapering myself, making sure to apply ample rash cream to my sore bits and slipped on a shirt and some sweatpants, reaching for my phone to call Tim, my hand hitting the top of the nightstand rather than my phone. I had plugged it in to charge before I took my bath, I was certain of it, and now not only was my phone gone but the cable and plug that had been connected to it were gone as well.

“Katie, did you take my phone?!” I called out, more than slightly annoyed.

Silence.

I got up from the bed with another sigh and headed over to my desk to video call Tim, sitting down in my chair while I waited for the computer to boot up. “I need my phone, Katie!” I called out, feeling incredibly stupid for talking to an obvious figment of my imagination.

The computer started up and I opened my video call program and got a “no internet” message that made me bang on the desk in frustration and spend the next fifteen minutes trying to get the internet back up and running with no success.

“Fine, no phone and no internet.” I sneered. “Let’s try and figure out what the hell is going on with me then.” I thought as I sat back down at my desk and opened the program for the machine. “Memory got me into this, memory can get me out.” I said as I typed in my desired criteria for my search.

Wanting to understand why I was seeing Katie when she was part of Tim’s memory, and assuming she was part of a data leak that implanted her into my memories, I searched the database of memories I’d established when I created the program, a map of my memories that encompassed every memory in my brain, even those that I wasn’t aware of all the way in the dark corners of my brain. I searched for fragmented memories and limited the search to only the last two days and came up with nothing. I opened up the search to the last week and still came up with nothing.

“What the actual fuck!” I spat. Sighing, I removed any time constraints and waited. My eyes went wide when hundreds of results popped up around age thirteen and continued for several years after that. “What happened when I was thirteen?” I wondered. “Was it me going back to the night of the camping trip and telling Tim I loved him? But why would that cause so much fragmentation for years afterward?” I thought.

I got up and padded over to my whiteboard, erasing a section and doing some equations to try and solve the problem. “Before I amplified the machine there would be no way for anything I did to make a difference in the events of my life going forward,” I thought, “even after the amplification, I wasn’t altering history, just my own memories.” I said as I chewed the capped end of the marker, staring at the picture I’d drawn on the whiteboard and giggling as my diaper warmed. The crude little house I’d drawn looked, to me, like a photo realistic portrayal of the house I’d grown up in complete with a smiling sun above it, the sun smiled back then because climate change hadn’t happened yet. Out front of the house was a tall stick figure in an apron, Mommy, of course, and a little stick figure in a diaper, Baby Lina, of course, but to the right of the Baby Lina stick figure was another figure, taller than Baby Lina but shorter than Mommy.

“What the fuck, that’s not math!” I exclaimed as I realized I’d just doodled a dumb baby picture. “Wait. Katie?” I asked the empty room as I looked at the drawing. “She called Mommy “mom” when she was giving me a bath and now I’d drawn her in my family.” my thoughts fuzzed and I slumped down in the nearby chair, the capped end of the marker being replaced by my thumb as I tried to puzzle things out.

She sighed as she rested her hands on my shoulders and whispered into my ear. “Give it up, sweetie, you’re never going to figure this out.” she cooed. “It’d be so much easier to just relax and let your brain turn into baby mush, wouldn’t it?” she asked.

I’d jumped in my seat when she’d shown up but the second her hands touched me I felt relaxed, a calm washing over me as I sucked my thumb, drool running down my chin as my diaper warmed a little more. “No!” I cried out, shaking my head vehemently as I tried to stand, making my quite dizzy and sending me sprawling to the floor on my hands and knees.

Katie clucked her tongue behind me. “Still as clumsy as ever.” she teased as she walked around the chair and came around in front of me, taking a seat on the floor to be on my level. “All those fragmented memories.” she said thoughtfully, bringing her hand up to cup my chin in her hand. “What could’ve caused your silly little mind to be such a cluttered mess?” she asked.

I fumed and batted her hand away. “Why are you here?!” I snapped.

She shrugged. “You tell me.” she said.

I got off my hands and knees and sat back on my butt in front of her, my legs splayed out. “You’re not really here, you’re just some glitch in the machine.” I guessed.

She nodded slowly as if considering what I’d said. “But why would you be able to see me when we’ve never met before?” she asked.

I chewed my bottom lip. “Tim’s memory leaked into mine.” I said. “I’m not seeing YOU, I’m seeing corrupted data that’s using parts of my memory as things it’s saying.” I explained.

She looked impressed. “Not bad, sweetie.” she praised, reaching out and patting my head condescendingly before she stood up, towering over me and looking down with a little grin. “But,” she said, “what if you’re wrong?” she asked.

I looked up at her and watched her walk to the machine, getting back up on all fours to stand myself back up. “What other option is there?” I asked, steadying myself on the chair.

She shrugged. “You’re too afraid to ask, aren’t you?” she asked. “All that fancy education and you’re still just a scared, and silly little girl that can’t keep her diapers clean and dry.” she chided.

“Fuck you!” I spat. “What, you want me to actually think about why you’re calling Mommy “mom” or why you’re acting like a big sister lording power over me?” I asked.

She smiled. “Or why all those pesky memories are corrupted at that specific period of time.” she offered with a little raise of her eyebrow.

I shook my head. “No, you’re a fucking hallucination and I’m just on some crazy ass head trip because I screwed with the machine and broke it.” I told her.

She shrugged nonchalantly. “Whatever you say, baby sis.” she said.

I groaned. “Fine, I’ll use the machine and access one of the corrupted memories and prove it to you!” I sneered.

“Prove it to the ‘fucking hallucination’?” she asked.

I nodded. “If it’ll get you to go away, yeah!” I told her as I moved to the desk and keyed in the data from the first corrupted memory, noticing she’d disappeared as I went and sat on the chair and pulled the headpiece into place.

********

The rushing sound of overlapping voices and noise wasn’t there when the lab disappeared and the memory filled the void around me, it was purely silence and darkness and I was cold.

“Hello?!” I called out.

In the darkness there was a faint blinking, yellowish in color just beyond my ability to make out the source. Then there was whimpering, weak and frightened.

“Katie?!” I called out.

I felt something tug at my mind, an urge and suddenly I was crying and screaming her name over and over again.

The darkness brightened and I realized I was upside down looking at the smashed windshield and dash of a car from my spot in the backseat. Outside the windshield I could see light from the headlights shining on Katie as she lay on her stomach, her face bloodied as she looked back at me in the car.

“Close your eyes, Lina.” she said, her voice quavering and raspy.

I shook my head. “Katie!” I cried, grunting in frustration as I tried to unbuckle my seatbelt.

She shushed me. “Stay there, sweetie, you’ll be okay.” she said, her voice getting weaker and quieter. “Tell mom that I’m sorry, okay?” she asked. “Tell her,” she whimpered and gasped as a sharp pain hit her, “tell her that I love her.” she finally managed to croak out.

My eyes burned as tears poured from them. “Tell her yourself, Katie, you’re gonna be okay!” I cried.

She smiled, her braces marred with blood, keeping them from glinting in the light the way they always did. “I love you, Lina.” she said. “I’m sorry it took me so long to admit that I was proud of you for being honest about who you are.” she said as she began to cough, blood spattering on the dirt in front of her.

“Katie.” I whimpered as I watched her essence fade from her eyes, leaving a blank, vacant stare of a dead girl in its place.

********

The lab returned and I sat forward with a gasp as I began to bawl uncontrollably, my mind spinning at what I’d just seen. “Holy fuck, what the fuck?!” I cried in disbelief.

Katie was seated at the desk looking at me somberly. “So?” she asked.

I swallowed down my urge to vomit. “I was there?” I asked. “When you died, I was with you?!” I asked.

She nodded. “Try and remember, Lina.” she urged.

I closed my eyes and thought about what I’d just experienced and my mind began rewinding the tape on my memory, stopping back at our house, Katie changing my diaper.

“I don’t care what you want me to do, mom, I’m taking time off to spend with Lina before I go back to school.” Katie yelled.

I sucked my pacifier nervously, on full display as she wiped me clean, hoping that if I stayed quiet I wouldn’t get pulled into the argument.

Mommy scoffed. “I guess it’s hereditary.” she sneered.

“Meaning?” Katie asked as she balled up the used diaper and slipped a new one beneath my bottom.

“Meaning, you’re no better than your sister, taking time away from your responsibilities to play with your little baby doll.” she spat.

Katie powdered me and taped the new diaper on. “She’s your daughter, why can’t you be supportive of her?” she snapped.

Mommy came over and thrust her hand out in my direction. “Supportive of this?!” she shouted. “Supportive of a bedwetter that decided to give up on maturity?” she asked. “Honestly, if it weren’t for you playing into this little game of hers all the time she would’ve gotten over it already.” she said.

Katie snapped my onesie closed and helped me off the bed to pull my pants up over my diaper. “No, mom, she wouldn’t because this is something that’s a part of her, just like-” she stopped.

“Like what?” Mommy asked, hands on her hips expectantly.

Katie sighed and took my hand, grabbing the diaper bag from the bed. “Forget it, I’m not doing this with you anymore, I’m going to a friend’s house.” she said, dragging me behind her as she headed to the door.

“If you walk out that door, don’t bother coming back!” Mommy shouted.

Katie paused for a moment and looked back at me and gave a weak smile before turning to Mommy. “Fine, fuck you!” she snapped and out the door we went.

********

I swallowed hard. “How do I not remember any of that?” I asked. I looked over at the desk, finding it empty and I stood up slowly from the chair. “Did I really repress all of the knowledge of you being my sister?” I asked. I hurried to the desk and opened the folder of pictures my mom had sent, scans from old photo albums and clicked through them.

Little Katie sitting beside me at my first birthday party. Little Katie playing with baby me on the beach. Little Katie holding my hand on the first day of school.

I shook my head in disbelief and clicked through to pictures of me as a tween.

Katie holding a bottle and stroking my hair as I lay on the couch with her, diapers visible beneath my nightgown. Katie playing on the floor with me, baby blocks and soft toys littering the blanket beneath me. I clicked forward and felt my eyes begin to brim with tears as the pictures of me alone began to go by, me on a swing sucking my pacifier with no one to push me, me on the blanket of toys staring off into space with tears in my eyes.

I realized the pictures weren’t real when they started moving and I felt myself being pulled into them to relive the awful moments captured within. I found myself seated on a pew in the back of the church, the flower arrangement and coffin far ahead, my parents sitting with friends and family while I sat alone with only a stuffed animal.

“What’s their name?” a voice asked.

I looked up to see Tim standing there in a dark suit, his eyes puffy and red from crying.

“Dis Kaydee.” I told him around my pacifier, holding the little purple and teal unicorn plush up for him to see better.

He sighed and took a seat beside me. “That’s a very pretty name, Lina.” he said.

I nodded and lay my head against him, cuddling the plush as he put his arm around me.

“How come you’re back here by yourself?” he asked.

I shrugged absently. “Mommy said I’s a dis-” I thought about what Mommy had said earlier when she was waking me up that morning.

“You’re a disappointment, Carolina!” she had screamed, yanking the blankets off me. “I won’t play your little game, young lady, if you want to be a baby you can take care of yourself!” she yelled before she ran off crying.

I swallowed and sniffled. “Dipsapoynmin.” I said, trying to say the word.

Tim looked at me and then up at my mother’s back. “She told you you were a disappointment?” he asked.

I nodded softly.

“Does your dad ever say anything to her about that?” he asked.

I shook my head. “Daddy ony hewe fo Kaydee.” I told him.

He nodded. “Yeah, I know he’s been gone for a while, but still, he shouldn’t let her talk to you like that.” he told me.

I shrugged, my diaper warming. “You Kaydee Daddy?” I asked.

He blushed and softly nodded. “I wanted to be, yeah.” he said.

“You be Lina Daddy?” I asked.

He smiled and kissed the top of my head. “No, sweetie, you’re a little too young for me.” he said.

I nodded, bored of the conversation if it wasn’t going where I wanted it to, and scooted off the pew to wander up to the casket, murmurs all around me as the classmate of Katie that had been speaking stopped and everyone watched me toddle up to the coffin and set the unicorn on top of it.

“Miss you, sissy.” I said softly before I hugged the coffin as best I could and turned to leave, feeling a fresh warmth in my diaper as I saw the glare of my mother that made me clumsily hurry back to my seat, trip and crawl the rest of the way.

********

I lay on the bed bawling, curled into a fetal position for hours after experiencing whatever the photos had caused, another hallucination, an actual memory, I had no idea anymore and quite honestly, I was exhausted and ready to give up on this emotional roller coaster.

“You’re not done yet, Lina.” Katie said as she sat on the edge of the bed stroking my hair. “You still have some things to work out.” she added.

I looked up at her and saw she was looking over at my phone, plugged in and charging where I’d left it, and I sat up quickly and wiped my eyes. “Where did you hide it?!” I asked, but she was gone again. I picked up my phone and unlocked the screen and went to my contacts, looking for “Daddy” which should’ve been right at the top, but found no such entry. I scrolled through the list, thinking the entry might have defaulted back to “Tim” but couldn’t find that either. I went to the recent calls list and saw that I’d neither made nor received any calls for weeks, the last one being a number I didn’t recognize.

“Katie, what did you do to my phone?!” I called out.

I sighed set the phone down.

“No Daddy to call?” she asked.

I glowered at her. “Why did you delete him?” I asked.

She shook her head. “Can’t delete what isn’t there.” she said.

I looked at her and then at the phone. “Tim was never here, was he?” I asked.

She smiled sympathetically. “One more step, baby.” she urged.

I closed my eyes. “No.” I said quietly. “I’m not crazy!” I shouted.

The phone began to ring, the same number I’d seen as the last received call in my history.

“Hello?” I asked as I hit the green ‘answer’ button.

“Carolina?” came a woman’s voice.

I nodded. “Yes.” I said softly.

“I’m going to count down from five, and when I reach zero you’re going to wake up, okay?” the woman asked.

I shook my head. “What are you-” I started to ask.

“Five.” she said, ignoring me.

The walls of the lab began to creak and groan around me.

“Four.” she said.

The lab began to flicker and grow darker like the lights were failing.

“Three.” she said.

Cracks began to form in the walls and floor around me.

“Two.” she said.

A deep groan filled my ears as pieces of furniture faded out of sight, swallowed by the ever expanding darkness.

“One.” she said.

The lab was gone save for a pinpoint of light as the darkness engulfed me.

“Zero.” she said, a snap of her finger accompanying the word.

I opened my eyes slowly and saw a woman in her mid forties to early fifties seated in a leather chair looking at me, the notepad on her crossed leg full of writing.

“Carolina?” she asked. “Can you tell me where you are?” she asked.

I looked around and swallowed, my throat dry. “Office.” I croaked.

She nodded. “Do you you know who I am?” she asked.

I started to shake my head, having never seen this woman before, and then she was there in my memory an instant later. “Dr. Klein.” I said.

“Good.” she responded, jotting something down.

“Can you tell me how old you are?” she asked.

My mind flipped through my memories like a flip book and I saw myself as all the ages I’d been in all the memories I’d experienced recently.

“Take your time.” she calmly encouraged.

I thought more. “Thirty six?” I asked.

She smiled. “Very good.” she praised.

“Where’s Daddy?” I asked. “And Katie?” I added.

She looked at me and reached out her hand to gently caress mine as I lay on the couch in front of her. “Carolina, think about what we’ve been doing here.” she said.

The memory snapped into my brain just as she had a moment earlier. “Katie’s dead.” I said flatly.

She nodded. “And Tim?” she asked.

“Daddy.” I corrected.

She shook her head. “No, Carolina, he wasn’t your Daddy, he was Katie’s Daddy.” she explained.

I shook my head. “No, we grew up together and I used my machine to find out about his fetish and then I became his baby and he became my Daddy!” I protested.

“Carolina, there was never a machine and Tim never saw you again after Katie’s funeral, remember?” she explained.

I felt my eyes begin to fill with tears. “You’re lying!” I whined.

She sighed and jotted down more notes. “I thought we were making so much progress, Carolina.” she said, her tone almost sad.

I sat up and glared at her. “Where’s Daddy!” I screamed, pushing myself off the couch and lunging at her, only to be stopped by a strong grip on my arms by two very large hands. I thrashed wildly against the grip, looking up at a giant of a man in a white uniform holding me tightly.

Dr. Klein sighed and got up, walking over to the small cart beside her desk to retrieve a syringe that she removed the cap from and walked over to me to plunge into my shoulder, injecting the liquid within into me. “Take her back to her room and we’ll try again tomorrow.” she said.

My vision grew fuzzier as I slumped against the large man and felt him effortlessly lift me up, cradling me in his arms as we left the doctor behind and walked down a long hall, the metal mesh over the windows blurring as we went. There was a loud buzz and the groan of a door opening and he walked forward and lay me down on a bed, securing my wrists and ankles with the straps connected to it before he turned and walked out, shutting the door behind him with a dull thud. The all white room was padded on the floor, walls, and ceiling and crayon drawn pictures hung up around the room, secured by tape.

I whimpered and feebly struggled against the straps, smelling the foul odor of a messy diaper a moment later and absently wondering as I slipped off to sleep whether there was a baby in the room with me.

To Be Continued...

[kerry]

Wow. That was fantastic. So, does Lina just have an amazingly detailed fantasy life or is this like that episode of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" in which Buffy discovers that she is in an institution and has imagined everything about her life in Sunnydale?

[TheUnknownAuthor]

18 minutes ago, kerry said:

Wow. That was fantastic. So, does Lina just have an amazingly detailed fantasy life or is this like that episode of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" in which Buffy discovers that she is in an institution and has imagined everything about her life in Sunnydale?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Seriously though, I can't possibly answer your question without spoiling anything BUT I will say that I'm very pleased you're enjoying the story and that you took the time to comment, it means a lot. #Linaisaslayerconfirmed

[Sarah Penguin]

[DiaperedPrince]

I had a slew of projects due and finals the past week that I'm finally through. Just read chapters 8 and 9, and I gotta say, the first 8 chapters had better not be a dream. I have very strong feelings against the whole story being a dream...

[TheUnknownAuthor]

14 minutes ago, DiaperedPrince said:

I had a slew of projects due and finals the past week that I'm finally through. Just read chapters 8 and 9, and I gotta say, the first 8 chapters had better not be a dream. I have very strong feelings against the whole story being a dream...

Same. "It was all a dream" is probably the laziest plot device next to "beige Betty kid is actually the chosen one/prophecized savior. I'm a hack, but I have standards.

[DiaperedPrince]

1 hour ago, TheUnknownAuthor said:

Same. "It was all a dream" is probably the laziest plot device next to "beige Betty kid is actually the chosen one/prophecized savior. I'm a hack, but I have standards.

Good. Then I'm looking forward to how you explain your way out of this mess ?

[TheUnknownAuthor]

24 minutes ago, DiaperedPrince said:

Good. Then I'm looking forward to how you explain your way out of this mess ?

As gracefully and eloquently as this dog, I'm sure. Also, thanks for the shout out, you always want as big an audience as possible for when you crash and burn, like this dog. Sincerely though, thanks for the support, I cannot wait to disappoint you greatly!

[DiaperedPrince]

2 hours ago, TheUnknownAuthor said:

As gracefully and eloquently as this dog, I'm sure. Also, thanks for the shout out, you always want as big an audience as possible for when you crash and burn, like this dog. Sincerely though, thanks for the support, I cannot wait to disappoint you greatly!

Wow, I didn't see the fireball coming. And no worries, I love publicly humiliating failed authors sharing good authors' works. ?

[TheUnknownAuthor]

1 hour ago, DiaperedPrince said:

Wow, I didn't see the fireball coming. And no worries, I love publicly humiliating failed authors sharing good authors' works. ?

Nice save.

Whatever your motives, your efforts are appreciated.

[TheUnknownAuthor]

AUTHOR'S NOTE: So, there's no real easy way of saying this because I know it will possibly keep people from reading further, but I don't want anyone to be surprised and triggered either. The next two chapters are going to be rough and they're going to deal with some heavy subject matter. My hope is that I deal with it in a way that it's clearly vital to the story, but if I fail and it feels like it ruined things then I guess I ruined things. Because I don't want to spoil anything ahead of time, I'll be vague and just say that the elements in these next two chapters are very serious and dark and could be a trigger for people that have dealt with them in their own lives. Proceed at your own risk, and if you are someone that is or has dealt with some of the things in these chapters I wish you all the luck in getting help for what you're dealing with and I hope you have a strong support structure in your life to make it manageable for you. Thank you for your time.

 

X

“Meanwhile”

The din of the crowd was the most nerve racking part of all. I knew, whether I wanted to admit it or not, that no one was paying any attention to us, that eyes may have landed on us but quickly flitted away like a fly unable to stay in one spot for long. People didn’t tend to see things like what we were doing outside of the morbid curiosity and the initial shock and disbelief of it. Heck, most people would feel embarrassed for us before they thought anything perverse was going on.

The mall is, or used to be when I was growing up, a place of community. Stores were a dime a dozen, ditto with restaurants, but a physical place where one could live if they were so inclined, a place where every conceivable need was met was beyond rare in this world, and a place that existed like that that you could enjoy with friends and loved ones as well as total strangers on the same level regardless of race, creed, gender, socioeconomic standing, that was a magical thing entirely.

We’d chosen the mall because of the crowd, Christmas shoppers jammed into a place hustling and bustling to get the things their loved one’s wanted were too preoccupied to really notice us, people taking a break from shopping to enjoy the figurative meats of our cultural stew at the food court were more likely to take notice but entirely unlikely to stop eating to approach us, and the parents at the Santa’s Village display were too busy with their snot nosed brats to pay any attention to anyone let alone individuals pretending to be part of their ilk.

“You’re sure you’re up for this?” was the question that was asked the most in the hours leading up to the outing, in the car in the parking lot outside the mall, out front of the mall, and finally inside but still near the exit, and the answer was always the same, a decisive, shaky breathed, wobbly legged, moments from wetting myself from nervousness, nod of my head that barely convinced me but absolutely sent mixed messages to them.

“We don’t have to do this right now, you just got out of the hospital.” was the out given to me, handed on a silver platter and gift wrapped for my taking, but still I soldiered on, anxiety climbing with every hand led step.

Eyes were on me, I felt the warmth of their gaze raising my internal temperature as we crossed the entry way border into the mall proper. The sillier part of me imagined those passing us on their way out were pulling phones from pockets and purses to contact the authorities and national news media, images of helicopters circling above the mall waiting for us to come out with our hands up to be detained, identities scrubbed from record, fingerprints burned off to live out our days in a dark hole our government had found suitable for people like us to spend the remainder of our sick, sad lives.

“Are you hungry?” was the next question I had to shake my head at, wishing I could find my voice and be more open about my thoughts and feelings as nameless and faceless strangers ebbed and flowed around us like a tide coming in and out of a secluded pool that only saw invaders when said tide brought them.

Just beyond the entryway of the mall was an enormous planter, tiled walls two feet high surrounding the enclosure that held an honest to goodness tree. Fed by the skylights above and the mister sprinklers below, the tree served as a reminder to all partaking of the mall’s offered services that the outside world existed but you needn’t stop shopping to see it, quite brilliant of the mall’s owners if I’m being honest.

Extending from the tile wall were tiled slabs that served as benches for people to sit and enjoy the piped in bird songs and smell the Earth in the planter, a place to take a breath and recover from the dense crush of bodies milling around. It was on one of these slabs that I was seated, not of my own volition, but at his insistence. The damp squishy feeling beneath my pants reminded me further that I was not in control here, despite his questions and offers that would give me the idea of control.

He knelt down in front of me, his hands on my knees, a concerned look in his eyes and a sympathetic smile on his face. His crooked little smile always made me want to smile, but his eyes in this moment made me uneasy and not at all like smiling, they made me feel broken and pitiful and it wasn’t like he was doing it maliciously, he was just triggering something I’d been struggling with.

“Hey.” he said simply. “This is too much.” he said, reaching up to brush an errant strand of hair from my face. “Right?” he asked.

It’s normal to be unintentionally inconsiderate when dealing with someone’s new or newish handicap, so I wasn’t mad at him, but being asked questions and knowing that you can’t answer because your jaw is wired shut, and knowing that they know you can’t answer because your jaw is wired shut is absolutely maddening. I shook my head.

He sighed. “Listen, I know you’re pushing yourself and I admire you for it, but-” he stopped and looked around, lowering his voice to a delicate whisper, “Are you wet?” he asked.

And there it was, the confirmation of all my fears realized, I was wet and it was apparent. Granted, he knew my situation and was, in his mind at least, my caregiver, so it wasn’t a bad thing that he recognized the state of my undergarments, but the indignity of being asked when, given the ability, I would’ve vocalized a need for a change was deeply upsetting to me and, as I did more often than not these days, I began to cry.

He hugged me and rubbed my back, and then he was moving and then I was being picked up and then I was watching a woman looking up from her book on a nearby tiled slab looking at me and I felt like her gaze was somehow connected to a hive mind and that all eyes were suddenly locked onto the broken woman with the wet diaper being carried out of the mall because she was ill equipped to exist in society any longer. I buried my face in his shoulder and sobbed, wishing things could be different for me, that I could go back and change things.

The automatic doors parted and allowed us back into the warm air of the outside, the air conditioned mall and its judgmental inhabitants locked behind the glass and metal doors never to bother me again. I was set back down on my feet and he was stroking my hair and kissing my forehead.

“You’re warm.” he diagnosed.

I nodded.

That crooked smile formed. “How about we get you home and changed and you can have a nice nap?” he asked.

I didn’t want a nap, naps meant sleep and sleep meant dreams and dreams were a thing of the past for me, all I had was nightmares now, but his hand was enveloping mine without waiting for me to obediently agree to his prescribed nap and I wasn’t in any position to resist.

“We can try again another day.” he said with a condescending squeeze of my hand that I’m sure he believed was reassuring.

I looked down at the ground as he led me back to the car, blobs of petrified gum, stains of spilled drinks or bladders moving along as we did. The ground was my world now, the only place I was free now, free from judgment or sympathy, free from the constant reminders that the life I’d had before was a distant memory and that my status quo was more akin to that of an infant than of a woman in her twenties.

Going home meant a dry diaper and a nap, not with him in his bedroom of course, that was a place I was only allowed to be for sporadic moments now, usually when he was getting something he needed and had me in his arms. I vaguely recalled being in that room as a woman, him on top of me, our clothes discarded in a heap beside the bed, his kisses on my neck and body designed for passion rather than the innocuous boo boo removal one’s I received now. I remember him being inside me physically then rather than inside my mind repeating the things he made sure I knew now. I vaguely recalled feeling happy and satisfied as his warmth encircled mine beneath the covers and we slept together without concern for leaked diapers in the night full of awful dreams.

Everything was duller now, both in a physical sense and in a more existential way. He wanted me to be happy, at least he reassured me that he did, but despite his best efforts I wasn’t and I didn’t know how to pretend that I was. Sure, I couldn’t fake the giggles that came when he tickled my tummy while he changed my diaper or bathed me anymore than I could fake the smiles that came when he was silly and pretended to steal my nose and eat it, but those things were superficial, more to make him okay with the state of everything than to make me feel any better. The time where I’d be something closer to normal was coming and I was both looking forward to and terrified of it in equal measure.

“Normal” meant being able to speak for myself, which meant attempting to reestablish my adulthood in how I was treated by him, but it also meant being punished for arguing with him. “Normal” meant hope for independence, but also meant being remanded to the confines of the crib he’d built for me, the straps I hated securing my wrists and ankles to keep me from “hurting myself”. “Normal” meant being allowed to visit her grave without his supervision, hearing the story he chose to tell her rather than the one I needed to tell myself.

“Your chariot awaits, dear.” he said in a faux British accent as he opened the back door of the car and bowed like a stagecoach footman to a princess or foreign dignitary.

I looked at him and then into the car, my wetness getting wetter and a denser substance invading the backside of my diaper and I shook my head.

He looked at me pityingly and put his hands on my shoulders to gently turn me around before I felt the back of my pants and diaper being pulled away from my body.

Tears welled up in my eyes once more as he gently rubbed my back once he’d released my pants from his grip.

“Poor baby.” he cooed softly in that tone he used to remind me that I was nothing more than a helpless infant in his eyes. “Do you not want to get in the car because you’re stinky?” he asked.

I shook my head softly and wiped my eyes.

He turned me back around and hugged me, one hand traveling down to the lump in my seat to pat it softly, his way of reminding me how far I’d fallen and how much I needed him. “Should Daddy change the baby before we go home?” he asked.

I wanted to jam my knee in his, I’m sure, hard dick and run for the safety of the busy mall interior, to find someone to help me escape him once and for all, but I was broken and unable to speak for myself and he’d catch me and take me back and I’d be punished and forced to endure more reminders of my true role in the world.

He pulled me from him and kissed my forehead. “I think you’ll be alright until we get home.” he said, guiding me down into the car, his crooked smile appearing at my wince as the mess squished beneath me when my bottom hit the seat. He knelt down and reached into the car for the end of the seatbelt, bringing it across my body to click it into place before kissing my cheek.

I looked up at him with watery eyes as he stood back up, the disparity in our height serving as a proper metaphor for our roles now, him, the adult in charge and me, the baby, something he’d always wanted for us and now had completely and without opposition. I reached for the purple and teal unicorn beside me and brought it up to my chest to hug it as I cried, her smell wafting up from it, cutting through the stench emanating from me and bringing me relief.

He shut the door and got into the driver’s seat, looking back at me in the little mirror attached to the windshield. “You wanna stop and visit her on the way home?” he asked.

I shook my head. I hated that he insisted on perverting her memory for me, changing the sequence of events to fit his narrative, making me feel more guilty than I needed to or already did as he spilled his lies over the stone that marked her final resting place.

“You sure, Katiebug?” he asked, using the “nickname” he’d bestowed upon me, the one I now viewed as my slave name, the one he’d given me when all of this had first started a lifetime ago. “I’m sure Lina would love to see you.” he said, his words a dagger to my heart, twisting to devastate my already fragile emotional state.

I shook my head and cuddled the cherished plush, closing my eyes to see her smiling face as she played innocently, prancing the toy around on the blanket he’d set up for her in the living room while he held me on his lap and poured his venom into my ears to poison my mind and keep me, us, under his thumb indefinitely if he could manage it. I was silent, but my mind was running through the words I wanted to scream at him, most were colorful variations of four letter one’s that would earn me a spanking if he even suspected I was thinking them, but “murderer” and “monster” were also acceptable, at this point I’d love to be able to look him in the eyes and call him by his given name, the one he’d ground out of my vocabulary in our time together, the satisfaction of seeing his surprise and rage when I stopped being his broken baby doll and just said, “Fuck you, Tim.” before I spat in his face and waited for him to lose control and send me off to be reunited with Lina.

To Be Continued…

[Babytom948]

Uh,what?lol

[kerry]

OK, this thing is written brilliantly, and I enjoy (?) reading each chapter, but I'm way more confused than ever now. One chapter after being told that Lina is (may be?) institutionalized and that Katie is dead, we get a Katie-POV chapter that suggests (says?) that Lina is actually dead...and that Katie is being kept against her will, mouth wired shut, as a baby. I understand the concept of gaslighting (though at this point I have no idea who is gaslighting whom), but this is perhaps the first time I've been gaslighted by an author...

[thedman]

Wow, just wow, this gets deeper and more twisted with every chapter, I'm always on the edge of my seat when I'm reading the new material