A question that may seem silly.

[ValentinesStuff]

I'm asexual. Interest in another person for sexual reasons has never crossed my mind. 

 

My question is, when do these sorts of thoughts start? When do people start having those sorts of thoughts?

 

It's just something completely outside my experience.

[beallucanb]

I fell in like/love with a guy once, we went places had loads of fun, I had a great time with him.

Reality set in, I went on my way, I went back to being my normal self.

[ValentinesStuff]

I realized I wasn't clear about what I was asking. I meant at what age do people start getting these sorts of thoughts and feelings. I didn't notice what was going on around me until I was 17 or 18 years old. Even then the idea that my friends were sexually active seemed absurd.

[Dprczyone]

I can't say exactly when sex entered my mind but I think I was late 13ish. Started noticing girls in my Junior High. Didn't really act on it until I met a girl a year older than me.in High School when I was l5. She was my first sexual encounter. It lasted about a year but oh what a year.

[musicaddict]

I started thinking about sex itself more in highschool, 16-ish, but discovered things i would later realize were kinks in middle school. I noticed both boys and girls really in middle school too

[JacktheShat]

On 2/18/2021 at 5:26 AM, ValentinesStuff said:

I'm asexual. Interest in another person for sexual reasons has never crossed my mind. 

 

My question is, when do these sorts of thoughts start? When do people start having those sorts of thoughts?

 

It's just something completely outside my experience.

Well that is a difficult question for me to answer. I started having sexual fantasies about my friends when I was about 10 or 11 but in many ways they were incidental to my various kinks. For most of my teens I was more sexually interested in things and role play scenarios associated with them than people. 

I have lots of kinks: diapers, spanking, rubber boots, workwear, uniforms. Until I was 19 i absorbed myself with the things and wasn't too bothered about anyone else being involved. I was lucky that i was able to build a small collection of kinky stuff. Obviously some of my fantasies involved others by default, but often in a blurry kind of way. Like getting spanked a teacher figure without it being anyone in particular. Or i would see a guy in wellies (rubber boots) and would have wild fantasies about getting to try his boots on, but it was his boots not him I was interested in. Same with diapers. I liked the idea of someone changing me, but it was all about me and my messy diaper.

I first had sex with someone when I was 19 and for a couple of years after, but I was very randy. But I was never very good at it and only really enjoyed it (beyond the physical sensation) if one of my kinks was involved. Over the years i have struggled with sex and generally prefer to masturbate alone with my gear. However I went through phases in my twenties and thirties where i was a very active gay man, but almost alway involving my various kins and my need to be submissive. I will not be particular, but there is a certain sex act that some gay men are into that plays to my strengths and need to be submissive, so I got by.

 

Hope that helps. 

 

[ABAlex]

I think I was 14 when I started noticing some people were attractive.