24/7 ABDL responsibility Self or Partner

[herb330]

Going 24/7 as a ABDl not only takes effort from yourself but usually includes your partner.  It involves, changing, feeding , shopping.  But wanted to know who has the most responsibility in a 24/7  ABDL lifestyle.

[rusty pins]

Philosophical answer, but I would have to say it's the person who is the AB/DL.  It's that person's decision to go 24/7 as AB/DL and live that lifestyle, no one else's, therefore they are responsible for it all.  If you have a partner, it's only right to discuss it with them and make sure he or she is OK with it and knows what they are getting into.  If it's what you really want and your wife or partner is against it, then once more you have a decision to make - do it anyway and risk your relationship or forget about it and be unhappy.  It's all on you so the responsibility starts with you.

If your partner agrees with you, then it is a shared responsibility and I will explain.  You have to set goals and boundaries and come to a meeting of the mind.  For example, are you going to be a 24/7 adult baby, quit your job, be fed only baby food by your partner, sit in a high chair, sleep only in a crib, do everything in your diapers and wait to be noticed as wet or messy and get your diaper changed each and every time?  Will you give up reading the paper, watching normal TV shows and just watch baby shows?  Give up everything adult, and I mean everything.  No hobbies like golf, going out with friends, normal get together's at holidays with your family, having normal conversations and discussions with friends and family or anything a normal adult does.  Who will earn a living to support this lifestyle?  Keep in mind if you do it 24/7 you will be just like a baby and won't be able to be left alone.  Wife or partner may have to earn the money to live on, but how much of that money will go for diapers and a baby sitter to watch and change you while the partner is at work?  Will you be going out everywhere in a stroller pushed by your wife or partner and being changed in the public restrooms?  Remember, you are a baby and won't be able to help your wife or partner get you up on a restroom changing table.  Once you have made that decision, you are responsible for it, however your partner will be responsible for all your care, feeding and diaper changes as you will basically be a baby unable to do it for yourself.

Perhaps you may decide to go 24/7 as far as diapers only, and part time AB only when at home or on specific days, which seems to me the better choice overall.  That way you can keep your job, still earn a living and take some of the responsibility and pressure off your partner.  I'm sure they would appreciate it as well, as who really wants to change adult diapers and feed their wife or husband and care for him or her as a baby 24/7/365.  Probably not what they signed up for when married.  If the latter is the situation, set the rules ahead of time and make sure both people are comfortable enough with them, leaving an "out" if after a while one or the other decides either it's too much and they want to stop or modify the situation.  Once you decide, then it's the responsibility of both people to stick to the plan, but physically, I would have to say the majority of the work and effort (not sure responsibility is the right word) would fall upon the person taking care of you as a baby.  They will feed you, dress you, change your diapers several times a day, watch you to make sure you don't get into trouble and basically do everything for you that they would do for an actual baby.

[BaronBrook]

A mix of both I think.

You have a responsibility to yourself to live a good, moral, enjoyable, etc life. This extends to a lot of the boring maintenance stuff & daily chores.

Your responsibility to your partner includes making their life better. You need to keep reciprocity in mind, and save them enough effort so that looking after you isn't an overwhelming burden.

On the flip side, if they're cultivating dependency in you, causing you to miss opportunities, and molding your life to suit them better then they have a responsibility to you.

Kind of like a breadwinner and homemaker arrangement. If the breadwinner dies, then the homemaker is royally screwed unless they arranged life insurance & such.

I feel like this planning should extend to break-ups, too. Given that marriages only average 7 years or so. A submissive or homemaker needs to have a good exit plan, and a dominant or breadwinner should have patience during a difficult separation. 

[oznl]

There was a thread on this quite recently:

https://www.dailydiapers.com/board/index.php?/topic/68963-a-permanent-baby/

I'm a bit hard line on this one: it's ALWAYS the responsibility of the ABDL to own their situation.  If they have a partner who can and wants to help out then great but even then, walking away from adulthood 24/7 is far from fair on the remaining partner who then must carry the load.

[rusty pins]

9 hours ago, oznl said:

I'm a bit hard line on this one: it's ALWAYS the responsibility of the ABDL to own their situation.  If they have a partner who can and wants to help out then great but even then, walking away from adulthood 24/7 is far from fair on the remaining partner who then must carry the load.

So very well said!  I 110% agree!

[herb330]

Being a 24/7 it is both the role of the abdl and the partner to make it easier.  of course the diaper changing and bathing and feeding is the responsibility of the partner.  My partner does not mind this.

[Firefly 35]

I think the most effort is on the ABDL to explain the lifestyle and if/how they want their partner(s) to be involved.  However I think both/all partners have an equal responsibility in coming to and keeping an agreement about all things in the relationship, including AB/DL things.