The Suit 1-18

[CDfm]

Loved it. Shows so well how a young boy is dealing with a problem he has little control over and how he comes to understand the situation and try to deal with it. I wish I had a like to give it but still don’t have any for today. I will be watching for more. 

[Les Lea]

OK thanks... it's nice to know you're still enjoying it. Hope it continues

[Les Lea]

Part 13

Anthony Barnaby Whitworth-Cleeve loomed large as the huge painting disintegrated and he became real. Actually, he became me (or I him) and found myself wandering the stately home searching for something. The sailor suit I was wearing felt tight so walked erect and slowly, my buckled shoes echoing with each step. It was quite eerie but I wasn’t afraid as suddenly my brothers appeared laughing and horsing around.

They were dressed as they would be normally, jeans and jumpers, yet I was still in this ancient boyish garb.

“Oh, Adam’s acting up again,” said Geoff (laughter from them both).

 “I wonder what makes him think he’s so special?” Joe jeered.

“Grammar school, it makes all them twats think they’re so superior…”

“Never mind, our little brother likes to play dress-up so…”

#

Smiling, but in a very unnatural way, they pulled at my fine clothes until I was naked apart from a very thick nappy, which had them both falling about laughing.

“God he’s such a baby, look he couldn’t get a bigger nappy if he tried.”

An evil smile came over Joe’s face.

“Well let’s see if that’s true.”

From a pile of nappies like the one auntie had in the bathroom (though where they appeared from I have no idea), they ripped off my plastic pants, which incidentally matched my sailor suit, and pulled down the thick and sodden nappy.

“Yuk, he’s soaked.”

“Isn’t he always… but we’ll soon have him dry.”

They gathered piles and piles of fabric nappies and folded them together making a huge, unwieldly bundle that they crammed me into. I tried to fight them off but they were so much stronger and besides, I’d never learnt to fight.

From this ‘phantom’ pile of nappies they found a huge white frilly plastic pair of pants, which they forced me into before adding the final touch.

I was thrashing around desperate to get away but they held me solidly with only my legs twisting but with no effect.

They stood me up and I could hardly move the nappy’s bulk was such that I couldn’t walk at all but they both cheered as they slipped a white garment over my head to finish the job.

“There, you look so much better.” And a mirror appeared in front of me.

It was only then I realised they’d clothed me in mum’s confirmation dress.

“Who’s a pretty baby?” Joe harassed, as he patted the enormous bulk between my legs.

Geoff grinned. “You are a pretty little girl, mummy and daddy’s favourite baby girl… they’ll be happy to have you back.”

#

It was so unfair; I felt I couldn’t do a thing to stop them. They were older and seemed so much bigger than I remembered. Neither of my brothers had been that nasty to me before so why now?

The taunting continued but all I could do was cry and wet my nappy. I couldn’t get any words out in denial or make them stop as this ‘mysterious’ pile of baby stuff seemed to give them more and more items to make me more juvenile.

I got a lacy bonnet, a doll (dressed the same as I was) and for some reason knitted socks and mittens appeared on my feet and hands. Finally, Joe attempted shoving a huge dummy between my lips.

“Now we don’t want to hear any crying or complaining. Just suck on your dummy until mummy comes… there’s a good girl.”

From behind the dummy I was trying to scream for help and wishing I could move but, like a baby, I could only crawl bundled up and noisily wail my protests.

My brother’s ran off giggling to each other and I was struggling with the dummy desperately trying to expel it.

#

Once again I woke up to find auntie standing over me. This time she was trying to push a dummy into my mouth but I kept spitting it out.

“No, no, no, nooooo…”

Only then did I realise I was in bed, in the attic and auntie was trying to get me to take the dummy.

“Sorry Sweetheart, you were so agitated I was hoping this would calm you down a bit like it did last time.”

I looked at her suspiciously, still partly in my nightmarish dream, wondering if she had a role in it.

Soon, I’d regained my breath and some semblance of where I was.

“Oh auntie, I’ve just had a really awful dream. Joe and Geoff were being horrible to me…”

I wanted to say more until I noticed mum’s doll sat on the pile of nappies at the side of the bed looking directly at me. Auntie had turned on the main light so I could see up the doll’s dress and there she was, still in her nice clean nappy. I wondered if somehow, that was the last thing I’d seen before I went to sleep and thus it affected my dream.

I just didn’t know what to make of the situation.

#

“Ohhh Adam, sweetheart, you’re absolutely soaked.”

The blankets had dropped away in my frantic struggle so auntie could see my bloated nappy and tight plastic pants. I was worried in case I’d done more than just wet myself but I think on this occasion there didn’t feel like there were any…

“Uuugghhh.” I was wrong, a very watery mess had escaped and the smell was just hitting me.

“Oh no,” I sobbed, “not again. I’m, I’m, I’m sooo sorry auntie… I, I…”

She just hugged me and let me get myself together. After a few moments I was back in control but I felt awful, awkward and anxious, I didn’t really want to move. Auntie helped me from my warm bed and for the first time noticed that she was still dressed.

“Wwwhat tiiimme is it?” I stammered

“Just after ten dear… but don’t worry, we’ll soon have you all cleaned up and tickety-boo.”

#

I couldn’t believe so much happened in a dream in such a short time, I’d only been in bed for less than an hour.

Cumbersomely, I was led down to the bathroom where auntie did her magnificent work in getting me all cleaned up. Once again she didn’t baulk at the disaster in my nappy, nor thankfully did she pass comment on it. I apologise again and again but, she just smiled as she set about her task and thoroughly mopped away the wreckage of my dream.

This was the third time auntie had witnessed a messy nappy from her favourite nephew and I was beside myself with unease. Wetting was bad enough but this, well this was too much but I had no idea why. I was going home on Saturday and mum and dad would be getting their youngest son in a lot worse state than they sent him out. Auntie may have seemed to take it in her stride but I doubted very much if my parents would.

Once creamed and powdered she put me in an even thicker nappy, the soaker pads giving it a mass I was rapidly becoming used to. She then reached over to that ever present pile of plastic pants and without looking pulled over a particularly thick pair of pale pink rubber pants.

After the dream of being made to wear my mum’s dress I really wanted to complain it was a bit girly but by the time I’d got my mind in order to say something, the job was complete and she was tucking in the fabric so I was air and water tight.

She then pulled over the blue fleecy one-piece pyjama and, after slowly guiding each limb into the correct area, zipped me up.

“There, you should be as snug as a bug in a rug.”

She smiled brightly, kissed my forehead and eased me out of the bathroom.

#

Again, auntie wasn’t going to let me have nightmares up in the attic, she wanted to keep an eye out for the rest of the night so led me to her bed.

“I’ll join you in a little while, but make yourself comfy and try and get some sleep.”

I rolled onto my side and all I could think about was how horrible my brothers had been (even though in truth, they’d done nothing) and how strange it felt to be in a huge nappy. I ran my hand over the entire fleecy package and sighed because auntie had been right – although I felt warm and comfy, things weren’t getting any better.

However, as I began to drift off to sleep the image of mum’s doll filled my head? I was pushing it mentally and physically from my thoughts but could only make sounds, I couldn’t speak. Like a doll’s my arms were just held out in front of me… they were stiff and useless. As I slipped further into sleep the doll and I became one. I was just sat there with unblinking eyes looking out at my heavily bundled fleecy self, sleeping.

I was trying to wake up but because I was a just a toy I remained mute. I attempted making words but they came out as muffled moans and I was getting frustrated at my inability to move. The thick nappy under my/her dress that kept our innocence also gave a comforting hug. I only settled down when I felt something slip between my lips and the act of sucking gradually made me less anxious…

I didn’t know it at the time but once again auntie had come to my emotional rescue with a magical and effective piece of rubber and plastic.

#

I woke up hot, wet and still sucking on the dummy. Auntie was already up so lay there thinking about the terrible dream and hoping it wasn’t some kind of premonition. My brothers had never been that vicious or horrible to me in real life so, why I dreamt of them in that way I wasn’t sure.

The nightmare and becoming a doll... the entire night really shook me.

I was still absentmindedly sucking away when auntie popped her head around the door asking if I fancied scrambled eggs for breakfast. It was only when I answered “Yeth pwease” around the dummy did I realise I still had it in.

“Okay,” she beamed, “You look cuter by the day.”

Irritation rose; was she saying that out of happiness at my situation or to try and cheer me up?

I sighed to myself and thought this wasn’t something I wanted yet had strangely been drawn into.

I began to wonder if this was some kind of conspiracy. I felt trapped.

It was a conundrum that Barnaby Blue should’ve been able to solve but I was struggling.

I knew it was my wetting the bed at home that had set me on this path. Mum suspected the reason for that was worry about coping with such a prestigious school’s demands. Maybe so.

I knew it was the directive from school that perhaps having to wear a nappy all the time might just make me more attentive to my bladder’s needs. I could actually see their point of view, they obviously didn’t want pupils leaving puddles or stained wet pants in class… and clearly mum agreed.

However, I also understood that this time with auntie, when there was no pressure on me to do or be anyone, still had me in need of protection.

What was going on?

#

I pulled out the dummy and wondered what I’d become. I felt and looked like a baby all wrapped up in a thick nappy and being hugged warmly in a childish (although very comfortable) one-piece pyjama suit that I remembered I couldn’t get out of without help… that made me feel even more useless.

Tossing the dummy to one side I ambled downstairs for breakfast.

“Auntie, I feel like a baby in these pyjamas. I can’t get out of them without someone’s help.”

She looked across at me.

“Oh sweetheart.”

It was not only a nod of recognition but one of benevolence. She thought for a moment.

“You look fine in them… aren’t they comfy enough?”

“Well, yesss, I suppose so.”

“Did you sleep alright in them?”

I nodded because I had no complaints about them only my dream - they did feel wonderful but it was the lack of independence I worried about.

“…and sweetie, haven’t you noticed the long blue ribbon I’ve attached to the zip so you can pull it up and down as you see fit?”

Actually I hadn’t. However, once auntie had pointed it out and I reached round and gave it a tug, I guiltily felt I’d been in a temper for no reason.

The zip was easily manoeuvrable up and down with very little effort.

“Sorry auntie, I didn’t know that was there.”

“I can see you feel frustrated Adam but I have strict instructions from your mother that I have to keep you in nappies until your problem’s passed. It isn’t that I’ve been trying to make it as uncomfortable as possible for you whilst you’re here. I don’t want you to feel…”

She sounded really upset.

“I don’t want you to feel I, or anyone else, wants to keep you wearing protection but sweetheart, you’re not any nearer to getting to the bathroom in time and I’d rather have you well-padded and safe, than leave you with wet pants or a trail of pee following you around.”

#

This was the first time I think auntie had lost a little of her cool with me. I know it was just a slight change in the way she spoke but I could see her point and felt incredibly shamefaced. Not only to have had those thoughts but to have voiced them.

I could see she was looking wounded, as if I’d accused her of some despicable act of treachery, so I rushed over and put my arms around her neck and through a barrage of snuffles and sobs, apologised for being silly and ungrateful.

“I know how frustrating this must be Adam, but you have to make the first move and try to get to the toilet in time.”

“I know, I know… I’m so sorry… really sorry.”

She held me tightly and patted my squishy full padding. I knew she wasn’t blaming me for anything but I still felt very guilty about everything. Unfortunately I had a problem as, unsolicited; I felt the warmness in the front of my nappy grow as we cuddled.

#

After breakfast I went back upstairs to my attic room and found just how easy it was to remove my pyjamas simply by tugging on the ribbon. I also had more room to operate in now we’d got rid of so much rubbish. The fastener slipped up and down my back with just a gentle pull either way so I gave it the complete once over. If it was up I was warmly ensconced within the one-piece fleecy suit, if I slipped the ribbon down, the zip reveal my naked body where the cool air rushed in chilled everything very quickly. However, thanks to the plastic pants any wetness stayed contained behind the protection, which also maintained a surprising amount of heat.

Once out of my pjs I waddled back down to the bathroom and pulled off my soaked night time security and took a long shower. I didn’t want to think about my situation but unfortunately it was unavoidable. My body wasn’t really that of an almost twelve year old boy, it was thin, pale and all but hairless. Pubes had yet to make any significant appearance where they should and my little willy didn’t do much even when I’d occasionally felt the thrill of something stirring down there. I certainly had more in common with the nine year old Barnaby Blue than I did with my own brothers.

I began to wonder if wearing a nappy was how I was going to spend the rest of my school days (I couldn’t think further ahead than that) and, should that be the case, how would I deal with it. So far I hadn’t let it worry me because I’d assumed it was just a passing event. I knew that my parents, and auntie to some extent, thought I was a little immature for my age and I suppose when I was returned to a nappy that simply confirmed it but, this wasn’t something I felt I wanted.

#

Those days at school wearing a nappy instead of underpants in class had kept me anxious all the time. The headmaster had been correct in that the bulkiness certainly concentrated my mind on staying awake and being aware of when I wanted to use the boy’s room. However, I was intimidated about revealing my nappy so I ended up using it a little at a time rather than face any ridicule from other students. By the end of the day, I’d pretend I was okay but the truth was my bloated nappy was only contained by the plastic pants mum insisted I wore.

The thing was, after my shower I waited for auntie to come so she could get me ready for the day with a fresh, clean nappy. I know I didn’t have any other underwear anyway but I looked around at the pile of stuff she had around the bathroom and was deciding on what I hoped she’d put me in.

#

Some of the fabric nappies I could see were quite old and thin, I’d worn a pair of them the first few times auntie had changed me. Astonishingly, she soon ‘discovered’ a pile of new, thick and very fluffy nappies that she used from then on. I didn’t know it at the time but they (and other stuff) were purchased especially for me so as to make my time in protection as comfortable as possible.

Although I quite liked the disposables mum had made me wear auntie’s ultra-thick fabric ones felt nicer. This was how far I’d come in accepting I needed nappies, in just a few days I was judging those I preferred to wear.

Extra padding was added on a night or after a particular severe soaking, which I simply thought must have been what was appropriate. Not once, since I’d been required to wear protection had I even questioned, or even slightly rebelled, against any of it. I don’t know whether it was because I was so guilty about wetting in the first place I thought it was a punishment, or maybe I found it an easy way out of accepting any responsibility for my dampness.

Meanwhile, the style of plastic pants; some thick and stiff, whilst others were soft and malleable, I’d worn with barely any fuss. I just assumed it was what was best in the situation and I trusted mum, auntie and anyone else given the job they had my interests at heart.  In fact, several times, I’d been really glad of their waterproof protection preventing a visual disaster from appearing down the front of my pants.

#

I lay out on the changing table, well what passed as such, for auntie to come and do her stuff. It never occurred for me to put my own nappy on so I waited patiently, thinking that pretty soon I’d be returning home but still be wearing protection, which I hoped I’d be over. As I thought this auntie came in smiling carrying a new brand of anti-rash lotion and a new container of baby powder.

“Okay sweetheart, the weather seems to be a bit better today so perhaps we should get out and about… what do you think?”

“Sounds good.” I nodded.

“Right, well let’s get you sorted first and then we’ll make a decision what to spend the day doing.”

She’d already spread the new thick lotion onto her hand so quickly rubbed it into my vulnerable areas, making sure I was well coated before the shower of talc whitened the sticky zone. A thick nappy with a couple of booster pads was quickly fasted into place and I noticed yet another new pair of clear, thick plastic pants were opened and shuffled up my legs. She smoothed the entire thing down and made sure all was enclosed before we went to her room to make a plan for the day.

# tbc #

[CDfm]

Oh how frustrating it must be for Adam. I am sure it’s the added stress of school that’s causing his problem and he seems so close to realizing it and overcoming it. I love his attitude though and his acceptance of his need for nappies at this time in his life. His attitude is actually much better than my own when I was informed that protection was the best corse for me. I was so very happy I could give this a like. I look forward to reading more. 

[Les Lea]

Part 14

By 9am we had taken a taxi into town and on a train to the seaside. For me this was an unexpected treat as I hadn’t visited the coast for some time. Auntie had given me the option of my khaki shorts or my new suit, perhaps surprisingly, I opted for the suit. I thought auntie would like to see me wear it as often as possible and, after the visit to the Ancestral Home, I did feel quite at ease in it (I also thought the longer shorts hid my protection better).

Auntie had been true to her word and we’d both inspected Uncle Bill’s ancient shaving kit, to our surprise a couple of the bottles and unopened glass containers had products that were still usable. My hair (what was left of it) had never been so slick, the quiff inch perfect and for the first time ever, I’d worn aftershave, even though I hadn’t shaved a thing.

Auntie smiled when she smelled me.

“Oh, you so remind me of Bill… that was his favourite cologne.”

#

As we took our seats on the train I was feeling very good about myself. Even with a thick nappy between my legs, and a slight crinkle when I walked, I felt like a credit to auntie (and school) and quite grown up; my shorts not distracting away at all from that fact. It also seemed that every adult we passed acknowledged me with either a nod of approval or smile.  Quite often, when I was out and about, grown-ups seemed to ignore kids my age but for some reason they appeared to like my ‘Italian’ short hair/short pants combination.

I’d always been polite, mum and dad and auntie had all made sure of that, so when they nodded and smiled at me, I responded the same way. It would appear that auntie’s choice of suit had been impeccable and I was carrying it off pretty well too… it made me feel distinctive.

The train was packed but we’d found a window seat and I spent most of the journey gazing out at the towns and countryside, or tried to catch the name of the little stations, as we sped through. It was fantastic and before long we’d arrived, although the nice weather that had started our journey had deteriorated slightly by the time we pulled into the station.

Despite the dubious weather there were kids and people everywhere and, after a brief, though exhilarating, walk along the prom, we found the town had an Aquarium so decided to visit that.

#

I’d never been to an Aquarium before and I was completely enthralled by all the displays. To begin with there were tank after tank of small illuminated tropical fish, which were nice but nothing to get excited about, but as progress was made, so the tanks got larger and so did the colourful fish on view.

A group of about twenty or so six year olds, dressed in their private school uniforms, were excitedly looking at the ultra-violet jelly fish - the eerie glow from these transparent, slick creatures, giving them an almost ethereal appearance. 

The group of young pupils in their dark green blazers, caps and corduroy shorts were all ‘oohing and aahing’ as the strange looking fish slowly floated and pulsed their way around the tank. The soft purple light was showing off the boys bare legs as they huddled closer to the tank to get a better view. It was at that moment I realised the texture of the jellyfish resembled the texture of the plastic pants that were keeping my thick nappy in place and, for no apparent reason, giggled to myself at the comparison.

Meanwhile, I had to admit, I was drawing my enthusiasm for just about every exhibit because of those young boys who were spellbound by the vast array of fish and other sea creatures on show. They excitedly charged from one exhibit to the next screaming their pleasure at seeing certain exotic specimens close up or for the first time in a live situation. It was catching.

I began dragging auntie around by her hand and in the end she began to tire as I kept up with this screaming group of eager school children. Eventually she wanted to sit down but said it was okay if I wanted to carry on discovering each new fish. We agreed to meet up in the gift shop area when we’d both had enough.

#

The group were being ‘supervised’ (well as supervised as twenty or so young six year olds can be) by five young women. They hadn’t completely lost control but it appeared that they were being led by those impatient young tykes as they raced from one exhibit to the next.

An occasional, flustered voice would plead with the boys to ‘slow down’ or ‘watch where you’re going’ or the frequent appeal for ‘Michael’ or ‘David’ to stop running off.

I just tagged on behind the group and whooped in as much delight as they did when we saw sharks above us as we walked through an underwater tunnel. I’m not sure if I was the only one but those shark’s teeth seemed pretty close, and although we were all safe, I heard myself scream when one huge toothy giant seemed to look me straight in the eye. It was at that startling moment I felt the first warm glow of my nappy receiving a full bladder. I may never have wanted to wear protection but at that moment I was pleased to be well-padded and securely wrapped in waterproof pants.

#

Stupidly I’d been holding it in for quite some time, not wanting to miss anything as we scurried from one fish to the next, so I suppose this outcome was to be expected. Standing in a tunnel, surrounded by water and with huge predatory fish seemingly only inches away was bound to get a reaction and that sudden shock certainly had the undesired effect. However, a soaked nappy wasn’t going to prevent me from continuing my quest to see every living thing that the Aquarium had to offer.

For the next hour or so, often in the company of those twenty school kids, I was mesmerised and thrilled to discover so many species of aquatic life I’d never even heard of. There were feeding times as well as spectacular touchy-feely demonstrations, which also kept our little group animated and enthusiastic.

With the café and gift shop looming, the final few exhibits were met with a longing to start the process all over again. The school boys were rounded up by their teachers and I looked around for auntie. She was sitting reading a souvenir brochure about the Aquarium and its vast number of inhabitants and an empty cup of coffee showed she’d been there some time.

I was guilty on two counts; One; I’d taken so long to see everything and Two; I was absolutely soaked. She looked up as I walked over to her with a guilty smile on my face. She beamed back how interesting the place was and hoped I’d enjoyed my visit. I replied I had but she noticed an involuntary scratch at my padding.

“Are you wet sweetie?” She whispered once I was within distance.

I nodded.

“Well I’ve brought a change so let’s get you out of that wet nappy and into something drier.”

#

The fact that auntie was so well organised I just took for granted that she knew what to do and I should simply follow her instruction. Over the past few days we’d been together not once had she made any comment on my nappy needs, she just got on with making sure I was as comfortable as possible.

We moved over to a children’s area where there was a ‘baby’s changing room’, well that’s what it said on the door. I was reluctant to go in but auntie was correct, I couldn’t stay in my wet nappy until we got back home so hesitantly I followed her in. Surprisingly it was quite spacious with several changing posts and shelving at different levels.

The place was empty, which was a relief and looking around auntie found a surface she thought was adequate. She told me to take down my shorts, but first I had to take off my jacket, slip off my braces and wriggle them down my legs. The plastic pants had done their job well but my fabric nappy was yellow and sodden.

I didn’t confess that a shark had scared me because oddly enough I thought that sounded more pathetic than the fact I couldn’t control my bladder.

From that point auntie took over and pulled off my plastic pants and unpinned the soggy nappy. I was surprised to see how well prepared she was with wipes and powder in her bag, as well as a disposable (one that mum had sent) and a couple of soaker pads. She wasted no time in wiping me clean and then drying me before sprinkling on some powder.

#

At that moment, the door opened and in walked one of the teachers dragging in a weeping and unwilling child who was stammering out his excuse.

“…but it was scary,” he blubbed, “I don’t like sh, sh, sharks.”

“Now Thomas, you’re soaked through so we have to get you changed into something drier.”

The teacher was almost echoing what auntie had said to me.

“But, but, but, I don’t wanna wear a nap, nap nappy.”

He stammered in his misery.

“Look Thomas,” she tried to be tender and understanding but the boy seemed very reluctant to play along. “You can’t get on the coach wet through. We need to make you dry for our trip back to school.”

He seemed unimpressed by her logic.

“But you’re gonna put me in a nappy and, and I’m not a b, b, b, baby…” He stammered.

“That’s what we have to do Thomas. You know the school rules, if you wet yourself its back to protection until tomorrow.”

This chat was going on as auntie took care of business with me. I was fascinated to know that even at this boy’s posh prep school they had similar rules to my grammar school. I almost wanted to say “snap” but as I was in quite an embarrassing position I didn’t want to draw further attention to myself.

#

Eventually, and with some sort of relief in her eyes the teacher tried to distract him.

“See, that older boy needs to be changed into a nappy and he’s not complaining.”

She obviously hoped this would be the deciding factor with Thomas.

His little eyes nearly popped out of his head and whilst he was dumbfounded, the teacher took the opportunity to pull down his shorts and wet underpants to begin the process of cleaning up her soaked charge.

As auntie pulled up the disposable, which also contained two very obvious soaker pads, and fastened me in, Thomas never took his eyes from me. It seemed he was more engrossed with what was going on with me than himself.

Auntie tugged up my plastic pants and left me to pull up my shorts, re-adjust the braces and slip on my jacket. All the time the little boy’s gaze never left my protected crotch.

#

I looked over to him as his teacher finished taping him into a rather cute disposable with Finding Nemo characters all over them (very appropriate) and for a second I was quite jealous of what he got to wear. Soon he was returned to a dry pair of little green shorts and back to looking like all the other kids from his class.

After we’d all nodded an acknowledgement to one and other auntie and I left the room first and stood in the foyer of the café whilst she re-organised her bag. A few seconds later and Thomas and his teacher emerged. The newly nappied boy ran over to his friends, alas, they all knew what had happened and what the result was… they chirped up and mockingly started talking in baby-talk to him.

The teacher told the rowdy youngsters to stop but Thomas was having none of it, without lowering his voice he announced that he wasn’t the only one who wet himself and pointed at me and said loud enough for quite a few patrons in the café to hear.

“I’m not the only one scared by a shark… that boy in blue wears a nappy too.”

It was at that precise moment that auntie, still organising the contents of her bag, pulled out the wet nappy she’d placed in a clear plastic bag and asked me to hold whilst she searched for her purse. Apart from every one of those six year olds, I’m not sure how many eyes were on me at the time because I shut mine in the hope that if I couldn’t see them then they couldn’t see me. I was also blind to see the reaction of auntie who gently took hold of my hand and led me out of the building.

The good spirit that the suit had created up until that moment slipped away and I felt like I was even younger than the school kid who’d made the comment. I didn’t want to cry but suddenly a nappy had never felt quite as bulky and was causing me to walk with a pronounced waddle.

I’m not sure this was the case… but it seemed that way.

#

Once outside the weather was slowly deteriorating so we decided to return home on the next train. At the station we didn’t have too long to wait before our return journey could commence but I wasn’t feeling as chirpy as I had.

The young lad’s comments had really upset me and I think it was more to do with a bunch of prep-schoolers (who didn’t have to wear a nappy) judging me more so than being worried by what customers in the café may or may not have thought. However, once on the train auntie gave me the souvenir brochure to read that was chock full of colourful photographs and detailed information.

Also, as I hadn’t eaten or had a drink for ages she produced a cheese and ham sandwich and a carton of pineapple and melon juice. I’d finished the drink before the train left the station and became completely absorbed with the well-designed, colourful, information-packed booklet.

The train was just as crowded as it had been coming but on this occasion we had to share the seating arrangements with an older man. I sat next to the window with auntie opposite, whilst the man sat next to me and struck up a conversation with auntie.  What started as a chat about the weather eventually turned to the seaside town and later our visit to the Aquarium.

As I leafed through the brochure he and auntie seemed to be getting on really well and it was only when I turned to a page with dolphins on it that he spoke to me.

“I love dolphins,” he remarked, “swam with them last year on a trip to Florida.”

I was quite surprised. A man who’d been to America and a man of his age swimming with dolphins, I was quite impressed.

Up until that moment I had been resolutely trying to ignore him and desperately hoping that auntie wouldn’t involve me in their conversation. However, now the man had got my interest I wanted to know all about his dolphin experience.

However, I’d been slouching in my seat for a while and auntie told me to sit up straight and I realised she was quite correct, slouching whilst holding a discussion showed a lack of respect.

#

As I sat up I could hear my disposable crinkle slightly and there was a soft rustle of the vinyl pants rubbing against the material of my shorts. I was hoping he didn’t hear it but I think he did because he paused a few moments before he carried on with his conversation. I think I even saw his eyes quickly scan my crotch and I’m afraid that the tell-tale smooth lump of protection was obvious. I think I wriggled under such fleeting scrutiny, which of course made even more noise.

However, he carried on and said that the dolphins he swam with were quite huge things, much bigger than he thought they would be, and the trainers where he swam had named the one he was paired with - Elvis. He and auntie chuckled at this but I couldn’t see why it was funny. He told us all about Florida and the theme parks he and his wife had taken two nieces there as a special treat. They’d visited everything that Orlando offered before driving down the Keys where they’d loved the continuous hot weather (it was now throwing it down as the train sped through the dark and dreary countryside).

Like I had with the tour guide at the Ancestral Home, I asked questions and was happy that I received some fantastic answers in reply. I was able to ask Mr Edwards, he’d introduced himself by then, about jellyfish, which had also captured my mind. He also found them fascinating creatures… although, like me, he had no idea what they were made from.

I was unconsciously stroking the front of my shorts when I suggested that perhaps they were made from very thin plastic. Again I’m not sure if he noticed by slinky bulge but smiled, said he didn’t think so, but confirmed that’s exactly what those pulsating little glowing enigmas looked like.

#

The train pulled into our station where we were getting off but he was carrying on to a destination further down the line. As we left he thanked auntie and I for saving him from a very boring journey and smiled at me.

“It was a pleasure meeting you Adam. It’s not often I get to meet such a polite, curious and smart boy your age… thanks for entertaining an old man.”

He shook hands with auntie and as we left the train, he surreptitiously patted my padded bottom. When I turned around he was all smiles and said that jellyfish and I had a great deal in common… both mysterious creatures. I wasn’t sure what he meant, although I could guess.

#

The trip from the station home was uneventful but once through the door auntie asked if I was wet. I actually wasn’t and didn’t feel I needed the toilet.

“Well that’s good isn’t it sweetheart?” That’s auntie being positive again.

I nodded

“Shall I get changed?” I asked indicating the suit, which I knew she wouldn’t want me sitting around the house in.

“I think that would be wise. Oh, do you fancy pizza tonight?”

“Yes that would be nice thanks.”

I ambled upstairs to my room and slowly stripped out of my suit, carefully putting it on hangers and checking that I’d not had anything accidentally spilled on it. It was fine.

When down to just my protection I stood looking at myself in the mirror and shrugged. Over this time with auntie I’d just got used to wearing a nappy but I had to admit that the disposable felt quite comfortable.

Auntie came in and asked if there was anything else that needed a wash. Of course the wet nappy I’d had on at the Aquarium would need attention but she had that.

“I’ll give your shirt a rinse through,” she said scooping it up, “and then it will be ready for when you go home tomorrow.”

I’d all but forgotten that my week with auntie was almost over and everything would go back to normal once I got home.

She picked up the fleecy blue onesie and passed it to me.

“Don’t stand around getting a cold dear… I don’t want your mum to think I haven’t been looking after you.”

I did feel a little chilly standing in just my disposable and plastic pants and I have to say the warmth the pyjamas offered as soon as I slipped into them was fantastic. I couldn’t wait to pull on the zipper ribbon and get myself firmly enclosed.

We spent the last night huddled together on the sofa eating pizza, drinking cocoa and watching TV. I also didn’t stop thanking auntie for everything she’d done over the last week; for the trips, the clothes and the absolute generosity of her love (which I didn’t mention but thought a lot about). Auntie had been wonderful, supportive and it had been fantastic to spend so much time with just me and her together.

#

I went to bed feeling full, warm and cosy. My newly acquired teddy was in bed next to me and I wondered if I should actually take it home because I was sure my brothers would have some unkind comments. I thought auntie had left a dummy on my pillow but remembered that’s where I left it that morning as I was getting dressed for our trip. Again, I wasn’t sure about using it but that definitely wasn’t going home with me… I wasn’t that brave.

It had been quite a full day but I got the Barnaby Blue annual out to have a read before I fell asleep but my eyes were so droopy I drifted off before I got around to opening it. My dream was of being back at the Aquarium but this time I was dressed like the little boys in their green prep-school uniforms.

Well, not quite their uniforms because their green corduroy shorts had been replaced by thick nappies and plastic pants. The plastic pants however were extremely glossy looking things with green and white vertical stripes. We were all transfixed at the jellyfish tank and marvelled at how these little translucent creatures could exist. The purple lighting making them glow as they slowly pulsed around in the water, whilst also making the white stripes on our plastic protection glisten.

My little willy pulsed in time with the jellyfish and I felt the warming glow fill my pants. I didn’t tell any of the teachers and carried on like the rest of the group screaming in delight as we saw seahorses and various luminous fish.  It didn’t appear odd that a bunch of hugely padded six year old school boys were charging around the Aquarium wearing nappies; everyone was smiling, encouraging or patting the boys as they zoomed to the next feature. I’m not sure how long my dream actually lasted but the lads and I must have gone around the Aquarium several times.

#

Saturday morning I woke up still feeling all cosy and warm. The small ceiling window was letting in some light but the clouds I could make out didn’t bode well for a sunny day. I was still clutching hold of my (newly acquired) teddy but had not given in to the dummy. My bedding was still in place and the annual had remained unopened, therefore, I thought, as it hadn’t appeared to have moved far, I assumed I hadn’t had a restless night like previously.

I remembered in my dream I’d wet but was hopeful that’s where it stayed, alas no. I quickly discovered the cocoa and assorted other drinks I’d had the night before were now well deposited in the disposable, which expanded greatly to soak it all up. My plastic pants were straining against my fleecy cover with a bulge that was forcing my legs apart. I lay there for a few minutes checking that I hadn’t leaked and grateful that everywhere else was dry.

I sighed to myself. Auntie, as always, had been right, I was getting worse. The encouragement she’d given me for staying dry between the Aquarium incident to when I put on my pjs was to no avail, I hadn’t been able to rouse myself from sleep to visit the bathroom properly. Even in my dream I was wetting myself in the daytime, so that didn’t bode well.

After a week’s stay with auntie I was about to return home but hoped that all this wetting business would be behind me by now.  On Monday I’d be back at school and back in protection because I hadn’t got to grips with what auntie had called ‘bouts of incontinence’. I was feeling a little down when auntie came into the room and switched on the light. I was still amazed at just how much room there now was since we’d done the tidy up but she was busy grabbing stuff to pack for my journey home.

We’d been able to empty a couple of cases and used them to store my new suit, the new onesie and shorts, the annual and the items I’d wanted to take home from the attic search. Auntie told me to take off my fleecy pjs and go for a shower and when I’d done she’d be there to supervise getting ready and then we could have breakfast.

#

I pulled on the ribbon and easily stepped out of my fleecy pjs, there was a brief cool thrill but the bulging plastic pants said all that needed to be said as I headed for the bathroom. Whilst I was cleaning myself up auntie was busy finishing packing for me and taking the cases down stairs. She’d left out my grey shorts; a white t-shirt, jumper, socks and shoes, everything else had been packed - except that is for a disposable and a pair of plastic pants.

#

She made sure I was dry and then rubbed in anti-rash cream and powdered me in a shower of white talc.

“I’m going to miss this.”

She whispered as she fastened the tapes securely in place and eased the plastic pants up my legs.

I wriggled and smiled. “Thanks auntie for a great week and for looking after me.”

“It’s always a pleasure sweetheart.”

She said as she helped me to my feet and I wondered back to the attic for the rest of my clothes.

I didn’t question auntie as to why she’d decided on a disposable instead of her preferred fabric nappy. I assumed that was because that’s what mum had sent me to her in, so she was just returning me the same way.

I was also dreading having to admit to mum that I was still in nappies and that the break from the stressful school had made no difference. I didn’t know how to tell her it was actually getting worse. However, I combed and parted my hair, made the best quiff I could and hoped mum liked the ‘new me’.

#

When I got downstairs auntie was in the kitchen but speaking on the phone to someone. The smell of cooking was making me feel quite hungry, so when she set a full fried breakfast down in front of me, I couldn’t wait to get started. She came back to the table with the phone and was confirming a time.

“Yes, 10.30 will be just fine.”

I looked at her questioningly but as I had some sausage in my mouth I didn’t say a word.

“We’re taking a taxi home sweetheart, there’s just too much to take on a bus.”

I smiled as I chomped away… this was luxury to me to have taxi service back to our council estate I hoped my friends would be impressed.

“I’ve spoked to your mum and Joe and Geoffrey aren’t back from camping in the Lakes yet so we’ll go home this morning and get things sorted.”

I wasn’t sure exactly what it was that needed ‘sorting’ but I was sure it didn’t concern me in the slightest.

#tbc#

[CDfm]

I am almost sad to see Adam leaving his Aunties home. I know I am going to miss her. I do believe that he is still going to have a large assortment of cloth nappies and plastic pants once he gets home. I was happy to give this a like and I look forward to reading more. 

[Les Lea]

Thanks but Adam's home isn't the same as staying with auntie and things might be a bit more difficult there?

[Pierry Louys]

Oh my ! Poor Adam ! He just need to be babied a little to grown more !

 

4 hours ago, Les Lea said:

Thanks but Adam's home isn't the same as staying with auntie and things might be a bit more difficult there?

 

[Les Lea]

Part 15

When the taxi arrived I saw why we couldn’t really have taken the bus. Instead of the backpack I’d arrived with I’d somehow also acquired two rather large suitcases. I could understand one for the stuff auntie had got me but I wasn’t sure about the second. My backpack was fairly crammed as well but I assumed that was with the disposables I’d brought with me.

The taxi arrived dead on ten-thirty, by then the dismal morning had given way to broken cloud and the breeze was warm. I still wore my jacket over my jumper and t-shirt but it felt like it might turn out to be quite a pleasant afternoon.

Because of the thick padding making me walk with a waddle I struggled with one of the cases out to the taxi, whilst auntie brought the other. After locking up we climbed into the rear seats, buckled ourselves in and off we went. The taxi was quite plush with leather seats and the smell of pine. The driver was a very chatty and animated young Asian man who fell into conversation with auntie about the weather and then somehow got on to schools.

As luck would have it, his youngest brother had also just started at the same school I attended. He was very enthusiastic about the British educational system and seemed very proud of Little Aziz, his brother, who was top of the class.

I shuffled uneasily in my seat as auntie tried to be complimentary about my achievements but she didn’t have chance to say much at all. Our driver didn’t finish one sentence or observation without having another ready immediately to follow. Despite that, it was a very smooth and quick drive and we arrived at my house in record time.

Auntie paid the man who insisted on helping with our luggage to the door but I knew as he followed me up the garden path that he was taking in the spectacle of one of his brother’s fellow students waddling along with part of his plastic pants visible below the leg hole of his shorts. I don’t know how big a tip auntie gave him but he was all smiles and ‘thank you’s’ as he eventually drove off.

#

Although I was still feeling guilty when others saw my protection, I had sort of gotten used to it. For the past few weeks, day and night, my crotch had played host to thick padding and plastic pants. Whilst at auntie’s I hadn’t been able to lose the need, or come anywhere near being able to get to the toilet in time. No sooner had I thought I’d mastered that timing, at some point in the day, I’d be left with a wet nappy to prove I was wrong.

Anyway, I was home now and mum greeted us at the door. I nervously shimmied in carrying one of the heavy cases, whilst auntie bounced in, kissed mum and told her what a joy I’d been for the past few days. I wasn’t sure how mum would take the news that I wasn’t out of nappies but of course I hadn’t realised that she’d been getting daily reports from auntie.

“Are you dry sweetie?” Mum whispered as she kissed my cheek and softly stroked my new quiff.

“Yes mum.”

I wanted to say ‘Sorry’ for all the inconvenience I knew my wetting caused but at least I was dry on this occasion.

It was as if mum read my mind.

“It’s alright love, we’ll sort something out… it’s not your fault, these things happen.”

Mum was saying all the positive things but I suppose she wasn’t really feeling it. She patted my padded bottom and told me to take my case upstairs and neatly hang stuff up.

“Shall I take the other case as well?” I queried.

“It’s alright, I’ll bring that up later after auntie and I have had a chat. Oh, yes, Danny and Paul know you’re back today so I said you’d pop round to see them when you got in.”

I shrugged, my friends could wait, and started up to my room.

“Oh, and by the way…”

I was caught on the stair and sheepishly turned to face her certain that it was something bad.

“I think your new hair style really suits you, it looks very smart … we’ll have to see if we can convince your brothers to adopt such a neat look.”

I was so pleased.

#

I hung up my suit, shirt and put my new fleecy onesie in the draw, our house can get really cold at times so that was going to come in very useful. I also thought the short onesie with the press studs and matching shorts would come in handy, it held my night time protection tightly, which meant I felt very secure. It was also incredibly comfy to sleep in and I was ashamed that I’d so far only been able to sleep in it once before I’d messed myself and, well, drips and drops happen.

I took off my shorts, mainly to check that I wasn’t fooling myself, but ‘yes’ I was still dry and, as per usual, put on a pair of older, baggier, playing-out shorts and swapped jumpers. If I’m going to be out with my mates I thought I’d better get organised.

Meanwhile, I left the Barnaby album by the side of my bed, I placed the teddy on my pillow, put Uncle Bill’s shaving stuff on the dresser then, as an afterthought, set mum’s doll next to teddy… they made a great couple.

#

Back down stairs I heard auntie and mum talking so I held back a little not wanting to interrupt and also cos I wanted to listen in for a bit to see if they were talking about me. They were.

“… it will be too costly dear.” I could hear auntie talking. “I’ve bought a few fabric ones which I’ve been using for him… I’m sure it will end up being better financially because we simply don’t know how long this will last. Also for Adam… if the poor boy has to wear nappies, at least let’s make him as comfortable as possible... that case has everything I hope you’ll need”

So that’s what filled the extra case; nappies, plastic pants and who knew what else auntie had decided might come in useful from the stuff she’d collected over her years of babysitting.

“Well let’s hope that won’t be a problem once we get him to another school.”

A shiver ran down my spine. They were taking me out of grammar school and putting me where things were less ‘stressful’?

“Are you sure that’s an option you want to take?”

I could hear the concern in auntie’s voice.

“We don’t want to but the poor boy’s having a dreadful time just trying to keep up.”

Mum was obviously trying to deal with my worries.

“However, we can’t take him out until next year…”

Panic was turning my stomach in knots, whilst tears had appeared in a rush to escape my eyes.

#

“Mummmm,” I screamed. “I don’t want to leave… I’ll do better… honestly mum I won’t…”

But it was all too much and the tears engulfed my speech.

Mum saw my distress and held out her arms in comfort. She patted my padded shorts but at the same time I couldn’t control the uneasy pee I was setting free. It was strange crying my eyes out, being comforted by mum, yet filling my nappy all at the same time. I was in a terrible state but, because of a warm and soaked nappy, I could see her point – my wetting was still a problem.

“There, there Adam, don’t upset yourself we’re only trying to think of ways to help.”

“But mum (sniffle)”

I couldn’t argue because I simply had no defence.

She stroked my back and continued to pat me bottom until she realised I was soaked.

“Are you wet?”

I reluctantly nodded into her bosom.

“Then let’s get you into something drier… and then we’ll talk.”

#

I wandered up to my room first and mum followed carrying the second case. She was a bit shocked to see her old doll sat on the bed but picked it up smiled and then lay it back down. She opened the case and took out a pile of fabric nappies, it was then I realised that auntie had bought a complete new batch. There were also several pairs of new plastic pants in various colours as well as creams and lotions to stop any sort of rash. She piled all this stuff on my dresser as I slowly stripped out of my shorts and wet protection. I stood there naked but with a damp disposable at my feet.

“Okay.” She took some wipes and a towel and cleaned me up.

Then she lay out a new cloth nappy and folded it exactly like auntie did and got me to lie out on it. Powdered and with a thick soaker pad in place, she pinned me in and slipped up a new pair of see-thru plastic pants. I put my shorts and jumper on but she simply came to sit next to me on the bed and hugged tightly.

“We want you to do well at school but we don’t want to see you suffer as a result.”

I was desperate to say something but nothing came into my head.

“If it’s all too much… we’d rather you went somewhere things might be a little less… traumatic.”

I held my tongue for the moment.

“Your dad and I certainly don’t want to embarrass you into having to wear a nappy all the time, so if leaving that school and placing you elsewhere will help you stay dry… then that’s what we’ll do.”

#

Mum said a lot of reassuring stuff and I blubbed… that is until I said something I didn’t know where it came from.

“I want to stay at grammar school (sniffle) and I don’t care if I have to wear a nappy for the next six years…”

Mum was a bit shocked at my statement. In my head I’d begun to find the words but they came out nervously, whispered and with little connection.

“Mum, I don’t want to wear a nappy… but if I have to… I want to improve and take advantage of what’s on offer… erm, uh, auntie has shown me how I can get better… errrrr, I think, (sniff) I can get better.”

Mum just hugged me. In part she’d already had this conversation with auntie who’d pointed out that if stress wasn’t the cause then they’d be moving me to another school for no reason. She’d suggested I see a specialist and also pleaded with my parents to leave me to try and sort things out for myself.

She’d told mum about my trip to the Ancestral Home and my interaction with her friends and finding the annual. All of which she pointed out was not like me at all but convinced her I’d made some kind of emotional breakthrough, even if I hadn’t managed the physical breakthrough of controlling my bladder.

“Mum,” I whispered, “If my grades improve this term, will you let me stay?”

She patted my fresh nappy.

“I’ll talk to dad and see what he thinks… but even if we do decide to move you, it won’t be until after the summer break.”

#

She patted my dry padded bottom and told me to go out and play.

“I told your friends…”

“Okay mum,” I interrupted, “I’ll go round and see Danny now.”

Playing out wearing a nappy was no longer a problem. All my friends were aware of my crinkly butt and although things were said, it was never a big problem. Danny and Paul were my best friends, I’d known them all my life, and while they didn’t go to the same school as me, we spent quite a bit of time together.

Paul wasn’t around so it was just Danny and me and we played in his back garden. I say played, we talked and I told him about my week away at aunties. He sort of snorted when I told him about the Ancestral Home, as if to say he’d never visit such a place. I was a bit sad he hadn’t shared my enthusiasm but I can’t say I was all that enthusiastic when he told me about his visit with his dad to the pub when he’d stolen a bottle of beer.

I became aware of just how much noise the rustling of my plastic pants made and in truth was quite grateful that my friend and neighbour totally ignored it. Although he was quite animated when I told him about the trip to the Aquarium (I didn’t tell him about being scared by a shark and wetting myself), all he really wanted to talk about was a girl he’d met who he ‘liked’.

That stilted conversation may have been the start of us drifting apart but he was a still my friend.

#

It had been whilst at aunties I realised how much I was letting people down by not applying myself to a more ‘mature’ way of education. I liked, and flourished, at junior school but the leap to a senior level had been hard for me to get to grips with. However, it was now crucial that I snapped out of my juvenile ways and get into a more ‘adult’ frame of mind.

But I had a problem.

Although my responsibilities for staying at grammar school were apparent, everything that happened to me during my stay with auntie had made me yearn for childhood. I identified with younger people more than I did with fellow school mates.

Whereas, all long-trouser wearing students at school made me feel inferior, I was happy to be associated with those younger than myself. In fact, the shorts I wore made it feel I was their equal, although, in the case of Barnaby Blue, it was obvious, he was way cleverer than me... and he was only nine.

However, next week was my birthday and I’d be twelve, almost a teenager, so I had to resolve that from Monday, and the new school term, I would be on the ball – nappy or not.

#

Later I presented mum with her doll and asked about it. She smiled but seemed reluctant to expand on why it was her favourite. I also asked about her writing and mentioned we’d found her story in the grand clear-out but she appeared embarrassed even thinking about it.

Mum had never been one to push herself, and certainly never mentioned that she liked to write, I said that both auntie and I found her story very good but she just smiled and dismissed it as the ramblings of a young girl.

I told her I’d found the doll in with my Barnaby Blue annual and wondered if she was a fan of the young detective. She just shrugged and said she couldn’t remember but I detected a note of regret as she said this. I asked if she wanted to keep the doll, which was by now resting in her hand and she nodded and took it to her and dad’s bedroom.

I hoped it would bring back some happy memories but on her return soon changed the subject as she sorted through all the new things I’d brought back from aunties.

She wanted me to try on the suit so she could see what I looked like in this most talked about and fashionable piece of clothing. I was reluctant at first but said that I’d wear it on my birthday with the shirt, tie and stuff.

She beamed and said she’d look forward to it.

#

When Joe and Geoff arrived back from camp they were both buzzing about the fantastic time they’d had. Apparently, the Lakes had its own microclimate, or so one of their group had said, and the weather had been pleasantly warm the entire time. I hadn’t known but auntie had bought them presents from the Aquarium - t-shirts with jellyfish on the front, which they both looked pretty pleased with.

They jokingly commented on my new hairstyle but mum was quick to bring that part of the ridicule to an end when she threatened them with an equally severe cut. All the family had a thick mop of unruly hair so they dismissed her threat… although, the teasing stopped instantly.

Mum and auntie were chatting in private for most of the morning and part of the afternoon before a taxi was called and she disappeared. Hugs and kisses, thanks and smiles followed her eventual departure and I wondered what had been discussed. I couldn’t ask because kids were not privy to what adults talked about whether it actually concerned them or not.

When dad got home he and mum settled down to further talks in private my heart sank. I hoped it wasn’t about moving to another school and just as I thought this, a spurt of warm pee filled the front of my clean nappy.

#

Unfortunately, I was in the front room half watching TV and half ear-wigging but it appeared that Geoff noticed, or heard something that drew attention to my crotch.

“Are you pissing you pants?”

The disgust in his voice was very noticeable especially as he pushed me off the sofa and onto the floor. There was a subdued but evident squish and rustle from my plastic pants.

“Wet babies crawl around on the carpet… not up here with adults...”

He seemed beside himself with horror, whilst I felt the warm pee soak into my thick and accommodating nappy.

“MUUMMM, Adam’s wet his nappy… again.”

I’m sure the next door neighbours would have been able to hear his alert as mum came in to see for herself.

“Ohh sweetheart,” she looked shocked though I don’t know why, I’d wet myself before and hadn’t got this reaction.

“Can’t you put him in a playpen or something where babies should be… out of the way of decent…?”

“Oi, less of that kind of talk young man… he can’t help it so there’s no reason to pick on him.”

“But mum, he’s twelve next week for heaven’s sake… we shouldn’t have to worry about a baby…”

“That’s enough.”

Dad was on the scene and Geoff immediately shut up but the look of contempt he flashed my way, as I was led up to my room, was very obvious.

He’d never called me a baby with such anger before (well only in that dream) and this turn of events worried me. Did both my brothers hold such revulsion at my problem.

Another apprehensive burst of pee escaped as I trundled up the stairs.

#

Mum understood despite the fact that she’d only so recently changed my nappy. She recognised the fact that Geoff’s dig might have caused me extra stress but she was about to give me a lesson in fitting my own nappy.

“I gather that auntie changed you whilst you stayed at her house?”

I nodded.

“Well, for a boy of twelve,” she smiled, “next week, it’s time you learned to fix your own nappy and then you aren’t relying on anyone else.”

I think mum had hoped that my problem would have been over by now but, as she couldn’t see an end in sight, she’d show me how to sort myself out. I’d taken on board most of the basics from auntie but mum was very precise, telling me to note that keeping dry and clean would prevent nasty rashes.

The entire nappy area had to be kept well-lotioned, well-powdered and “scrupulously pristine” (mum’s word).

A nappy needed to be tight but comfortable and I must always make sure everything is tucked in behind the plastic pants if I didn’t want tell-tale leaks.

Under mum’s supervision I tried a couple of times until she was sure I had it down.

She pointed to the various heaps of protection piled on my dresser and taught me how to hold and use the large safety pins.

“Try not to stab yourself.” she smiled. “From now on sweetheart, you’ll be in charge of your own changes.”

#

So as not to encroach into other people’s space, all my protection was kept in my room. There was an air of lotion and baby powder and I hoped against hope that the smell of urine and… the other… would be kept to the absolute minimum.

Mum had told me to organise my toilet visits when I could, so, number two’s were definitely something I wanted to get rid of before getting nappied for the day. She suggested that I make every effort between waking up and getting ready for the day ahead, to visit the toilet for that all important clear out.

She pointed out that once at school I needed to keep focused because the last thing I would want is a messy accident in class. However, the thick plastic pants I would be wearing for school would keep any unwanted odours at bay for a little while at least. She confidently informed me that it would give me time to get to the boys toilets to sort things out, should such a thing occur. Of course, if I had a problem, she emphasised, then the school matron would be there as back up.

She laughed as she said this as if it was a line from some TV detective show and echoed her own words

“Back up.”

She repeated just how important each step was to maintaining a rash-free zone, which, she said, might be helped by the removal of the small tufts of hair that were beginning to sprout. She said there was a cream she’d get when next at work. I just nodded; I had no problem with that at all, wondering why anyone would be happy with hair growing down there in the first place.

After she was sure I’d completed every part of the task to her standard and felt able in future to leave the operation to me alone, she said that for a birthday treat we’d be going out to a restaurant.

I had no idea. We weren’t party people. Normally we’d just celebrate such occasions as a family and perhaps one or two friends round for tea and some sandwiches, but didn’t make a big thing about it. Money was scarce, so everything was done with as little expense as possible though we still got presents, it was best not to ask for anything too costly, so going out for a meal was very special indeed.

I told her I was excited by the prospect but in truth, auntie had bought me so much, and taken me everywhere over the past week, already it had been like one huge birthday present from start to finish.

#

Auntie’s ‘present’ of the new, soft, thick and absorbent nappies were very welcome. They were of a higher quality than the ones mum had brought home from work and I suppose I’d gotten used to them. Although I couldn’t pretend I wasn’t wearing (the bulk wasn’t easily disguised), they were at least very comfortable, especially to sleep in. As it turned out, despite any attempts to the contrary, I flooded every night so they, together with my tight vinyl pants, meant the rest of my bed and bedding were kept safe and dry.

When I say ‘attempts to the contrary’ I mean that sometimes I was able to get to the toilet in time and despite the heavy padding, managed to slip my fingers up the leg and have a proper, if difficult, pee. Of course, the annoying thing was when I slept this didn’t happen and what was worse, sometimes I peed during the day without knowing I was doing so. There was no way round it, I needed nappies to keep me secure and in truth I welcomed the reassurance they gave.

I had promised mum and dad that no matter what, I didn’t want to move school, so was determined that my pants (nappy) wetting wasn’t going to stop me from doing that. So, no matter how much I might get made fun of I couldn’t let it get to me. I had to act like Barnaby Blue, be pleasant but superior to those who thought I was nothing but a baby pretending to be grown-up. Although I’m sure the young detective was never questioned about wearing a nappy.

#

Now here’s a strange thought. I was a week away from being twelve, identified with younger boys but suddenly felt like I was being treated as a grown-up because I was being allowed to change my own nappy. The fact that I was twelve and wearing a nappy didn’t seem that weird at that moment. As I slipped my shorts over the bulkiness I’d just adorned myself in I was actually feeling pretty good. I’d accomplished something I hadn’t successfully completed before and that was the main thing.

Yes, I know… madness?

#

Geoffrey’s attitude towards me continued to be hostile in that he hardly spoke or acknowledged me. Meanwhile, it didn’t appear to bother Joe in the slightest. At one point, when only we three were together, Geoff asked Joe if it didn’t worry him having a brother who still pissed his pants, he replied that he found it more embarrassing that he had a brother who wore a City football shirt (he supported United). That ended up in a strange fight that dad had to sort out. Also, because he knew it was annoying to Geoff, Joe made more of a fuss of me than he normally had done. If my nappies worried him, he certainly wasn’t going to let our middle brother know.

Anyway, back at school and there were now only three boys in my class still wearing shorts and perhaps another half dozen in the rest of school. As I couldn’t hide the fact I wore a nappy there seemed little point in denying the fact, even if I was the only one. I’d like to think that I was being very brave but in truth I didn’t see I had much option. I certainly didn’t want to change schools, so my attitude had to change.

Also I noticed ‘Little Aziz’, the taxi driver’s brother. He was tall, very good looking and appeared to have just emerged from a photoshoot, his clothes were immaculate. I’d only just seen him but the confident way he held himself, the smile that lit up his face, and his dark complexion all conspired to make him appear as some sort of mystical deity. If I wasn’t already bound to Barnaby Blue, he could quite easily have become my hero.

It was early days yet!

#

Homework!

Yes, something I’d always hated and couldn’t see the point in I took more seriously. So, after arriving home at 4pm, changing out of the damp nappy and into something clean and dry I made the effort to delve straight into doing what was required. I sat on my bed wearing only a jumper and my nappy covered with clear plastic pants. I didn’t feel the need for shorts or any other distraction as I opened my books and set to work. I immersed myself and after what seemed only moments was called down for dinner, I’d been engrossed in my homework for over two hours and the time had simply flown by.

Mum had shouted up the stairs and I didn’t realise that Geoff was also doing homework in his room, I never heard him come home, apparently Joe was playing football so was going to be late. I opened my bedroom door the exact same time as Geoffrey did his and he saw me standing there in just my slippery plastic pants.

“Oh for fuck sake,” he said with ill-concealed contempt. “Put some fucking pants on you big baby.”

I saw the anger in his eyes and quickly returned to my room to retrieve some shorts, he followed.

“You know you’re a fucking embarrassment to the entire fucking family don’t you?” He spat. “You should be locked out of sight until…” he suddenly seemed lost for words until I saw mum standing at the top of the stairs.

“Get to your room now.” Mum’s voice had taken on a very threatening tone and Geoff’s face flushed at having been caught.

“But, but… I’m only saying what everyone is thinking… I, I…” he babbled as mum told me to go down and wait whilst she sorted my brother out.

#

Geoffrey didn’t immediately come down for his meal and mum didn’t make any excuse when she eventually returned. There was an atmosphere I didn’t want to get into but when dad came home soon after, mum had a word and he disappeared up to Geoff’s bedroom. Both Geoff and Joe are tough lads but I think on this occasion my brother had met his match when both my parents turned on him. I could hear shouting and crying but when dad returned he simply said that my brother would be borrowing some of my nappies for the near future.

I was shocked. I could only imagine what Geoff would be like… and would no doubt blame me. As it was, when he eventually did emerge, because he wasn’t allowed to wallow in his room, the bulkiness under his loose-fitting football shorts was unmistakable. His crinkling waddle and rustle of the plastic pants were the same as what I put up with every day. He was made to apologise to me and ask if it was OK for him to borrow some nappies. He was a very unhappy and chastised fourteen year-old.

I have no idea what threat dad had used but Geoff was completely destroyed and something I’d never seen before… fearful. His face was flushed but I have no idea if dad had spanked him or what but I’d never seen him so afraid.

Dad had always been dad. I’d never seen him like this; angry, ferocious and determined. Dad had always been a friend as well as a dad and I think this new version of him had scared Geoff completely. It had certainly put me on my best behaviour.

“For the next 24 hours you will be wearing what Adam has to wear. If you try to take your nappy and plastic pants off, you’ll be wearing them for a week.”

Dad was in no mood to be messed with.

“Are we clear?”

I’ve never been a spiteful person, so I wasn’t pleased that my brother had been returned to wearing a nappy. I took no pleasure in it and actually felt sorry for him because I knew how difficult it was getting used to such an item cupping your bits. The thick fabric not letting you forget for a moment it’s there.

I had no idea what battle must have gone on in that bedroom but dad had won and Geoff was defeated.

He nodded submissively but didn’t dare look up.

“You’ve been an absolute pain to Adam and your attitude stinks… maybe time having to put up with what your brother has to every day will teach you a lesson.”

I hadn’t really grasped what dad meant but then suddenly realised it indicated that he’d be going to school wearing a nappy. I felt awful for him but both mum and dad had obviously come to the end of their tether and were determined to nip Geoff’s nastiness in the bud.

# tbc #

[Les Lea]

Part 16

The meal was a strange affair with mum and dad acting like nothing unusual had happened. Neither Geoff nor I spoke much and at times, I was so anxious about everything, it was a struggle to get the food down. All I could think of was that my brother would take it out on me and it wasn’t my fault. However, when Joe got in and saw the state of Geoffrey he couldn’t help but burst into fits of laughter.

“Not before time.” He said, as if he was giving his blessing to the work my parents had done.

“We don’t want you saying anything…” Mum said as if to stop any further strife.

“He’ll get nothing from me… I only hope he can deal with it as well as Adam.”

Joe was the eldest of us brothers and carried that responsibility fairly well. He was tough, sporty, had a good sense of humour and cheeky without being disrespectful. Of course he was just my older brother so I never clocked any of these positive attributes… though mum and dad must have put great store in them.

He looked over, smiled and winked at me as if I was now getting his approval; Geoff just looked at his half eaten plate of food almost on the verge of tears.

It was a strange feeling knowing that… although I was wearing a nappy I didn’t mind, my brother was going through hell and having all the doubts and worries about what other people might do or say like I once had.

#

With Joe and Geoff sharing a room it was difficult for there to be no reaction to the situation. Geoff hated that every time he moved there was a rustling sound and even without Joe saying a word, he knew he was being judged. Needless to say it came to a head and Geoff threw an almighty tantrum.

I think Joe was prepared for it, and with him being slightly bigger but a lot stronger, held him tightly trying to calm him down. Geoffrey was shouting abuse, swearing and promising untold harm to everyone as he tried to wriggle free of his thick nappy and Joe’s strong arms.

That was until dad arrived.

He sent Joe out of the room, slammed the bedroom door shut and a few seconds later I heard Geoff wailing and the sound of severe punishment taking place. As far as I knew, up until recently, dad had never spanked any of us, well I know for certain he’d never spanked me, but this was a strained time, which certainly had an effect on my brother.

#

Geoff screamed the place down as his bottom was well and truly thrashed. Dad pointed out that he shouldn’t have to resort to violence but if Geoff was happy to use it against his brothers, so was he.

According to Joe, dad had pointed out his punishment would have been over in 24 hours but he had to over react… therefore, until further notice, and it would all depend on his behaviour being exemplary, the nappy stayed. Any further tantrums would mean a longer term wearing nappies… and only nappies.

My brother was in tears, I’d rarely seen him like that and it came as a shock. Geoffrey wasn’t known as being soft in any way but this had hit him hard. Despite having been rotten towards me, the thick padding, together with weepy eyes made me feel sorry for him.

I think Geoff eventually got the message and for the next few days he was well-behaved. He couldn’t hide himself away our parents wouldn’t let him, but appeared to cope quite well once he realised he had little choice.  

I’m not sure just how well his jeans or grey school trousers hid the bulkiness underneath. Perhaps it was because I knew it was there that meant I could see it. However, there was no denying that both of us were definitely thickly protected both day and night.

#

He was checked both morning and evening by either mum or dad and, because they were at the same school, Joe was under instructions to make regular checks… in public if need be. Apparently, the threat of this alone made it so Geoff didn’t even try to take them off without permission.

He was learning a lesson the hard way but appeared to be handling it pretty well.

I don’t know how he did it but I never heard that he’d wet himself once. He would’ve had to have a gargantuan struggle to get to the loo and privately fish his ‘willy’ out to pee properly but, he seemed to have managed it.

After four days dad let him off, although with the threat of a return should he start up again.

Dad called me into their bedroom where he had Geoff standing wearing nothing but his thick nappy and plastic pants and asked him if he’d enjoyed having to wear a nappy 24/7 to which a thoroughly reprimanded brother shook his head.

“Do you think Adam likes having to?”

“No… s’pose not,” he answered quietly.

“Now you’ve experienced it for yourself… do you have anything to say to your brother?”

“Erm, sorry Adam.”

Although he said this in hushed tones I knew he meant it and wasn’t just saying it because dad expected him to. It was the only apology I ever got from my bro so I thanked and hugged him - we briefly crinkled together.

Once I’d finished dad hugged him as well and I could see relief as Geoff returned the embrace with some strength. It had been a learning curve for us all but Geoff appeared super relieved it was over. However, dad reiterated that he was on parole, so everything could go back as it had been.

#

Meanwhile, with all this going on, I immersed myself in school and schoolwork. I tried to keep out of Geoff’s way but Joe was keeping an eye on him and, truth be known, he never said anything snide or acted nastily. I was relieved but only hoped it continued.

Even with thick daily padding my confidence was growing at home and school.

My new, ‘in your face’, attitude (this was no one else’s description but my own) also helped put into place the advice auntie gave of finding some aspect of each lesson to latch on to. Something I discovered fascinating, interesting or needed to know more about. I found myself asking more questions and unbelievably, the teachers responded to my interest and I noticed an almost immediate improvement in my standing.

I did find that ‘something’ and oddly enough, my nappy remained dry until each break when I’d rush to the boy’s room, desperately try to unleash my willy from the folds of material (like I thought Geoff had done), and actually have a proper pee. Sometimes I managed to do this in time, other times I was just too late, but at least I was thinking about things and not daydreaming.

At her request I visited the matron once so she could ask me about my problem. She said she needed to make a report to the headmaster and, as she’d already spoken to my mother, wanted to get my angle on everything. I told her about my new attitude but had to admit I was still having wetting episodes though mum had now taught me to change myself – I was responsible for my own ‘comfort’.

It suddenly occurred to me she was checking to see if mine and mum’s accounts were the same. Her smile and friendly patting of my padded bum as I left her office told me we were all on the same page. I was relieved I’d told the truth and not try to hide anything and I hoped she would see that as positive in her report.

I also found these little battles I was having with my protection quite interesting. Even if my plastic pants and bulge were recognisable to everyone I didn’t see them as a barrier like I had previously. Now they were a challenge, like my school work, to be approached in a different way and I was quite surprised to find myself thinking in this manner.

#

Because of all the homework I was given I spent an awful lot of time in my bedroom studying. Often, if I’d changed I would simply lie around in my t-shirt and nappy until either called for a meal or it was time for bed. Often just the plastic pants were added when I went to sleep; also, I was now joined every night by the teddy bear I’d brought back from aunties. After a few hours of writing and swotting, I was pleased to be able to hug that soft bear to help drop off.

By now I’d finished my Barnaby Blue annual but he still maintained a very strong influence. I liked his strong personal belief, moral compass and dogged determination, all the things lacking in myself but I wanted to change that.

Now I can’t pretend that I didn’t occasionally wake up or arrive home with a soaked nappy, because I did, but that little lecture auntie had given, and with Barnaby’s continued inspiration, made me think twice about what senior school was all about.

I may have been ridiculed in the playground for wearing shorts and protection but in class, I was a force to be reckoned with.

Well, perhaps that’s selling it a little strong… but I did change… and not just my nappy.

#tbc#

[CDfm]

Loved the two new chapters. Geoff really messed up. Heck I was scard of dad and I was only reading about him getting hot. I bet that after the thrashing his dad gave him, he was glad to have the comfort of a soft thick nappy. I was glad to see the attitude change in Adam. That could be just the thing that gives him back the confidence to stay dry. Even if he continues to wet and need the nappies his new confidence will still help him in school. I was very happy to be able to give this a like. I will be watching for more. 

[Les Lea]

Part 17

Saturday and my birthday arrived. Officially I was now a twelve year old and had cards with that printed on to prove it. I’d received a couple of presents – to my great surprise Joe had managed to find another Barnaby Blue annual in a second hand book store. It was a little tatty but I was quite overwhelmed he’d gone to so much trouble. Meanwhile, Geoff’s attitude had softened and I was surprised to find a badly wrapped globe as his gift. I’m not sure where he’d got it from but I loved it. It was another thoughtful present that I couldn’t believe came from my brothers.

Mum and dad looked equally shocked and said they’d give me their gift later… I think it was a late delivery and were still waiting to collect it from the shop.

Not surprisingly it was auntie who’d organised the restaurant and the entire family dressed up for the event. Of course, I wore my new suit. It was the first time the family had seen me in it and I was wearing a well-padded nappy and thick plastic pants just to be sure. I checked myself in the mirror and flattened the bulge down a little bit. At first I wasn’t too sure; the red braces, red tie, red and black checked socks… I knew from past experience that the longer shorts hid my protection to a degree but I was still nervous as I emerged from the bedroom for everyone to see me in all my ‘Italian style’ glory.

#

I knew I looked smart because of the comments from auntie’s friends but my family made me a little uneasy, thankfully Joe said I looked just like Barnaby, which pleased me no end. Meanwhile, mum and dad just whistled their approval and Geoff nodded his. My Italian styling hadn’t set everyone off into giggles, there were no snide comments, just positive remarks and any trepidation I’d had quickly disappeared.  Auntie of course just beamed with pride as the birthday boy took up his position as the centre of attention. I loved it.

There was no doubt about it; I was still very much the baby of the family. I was still growing into the shorts and jacket but despite this; it was something of mine, and mine alone, so felt quite proud of that.

Now I’d worn it a couple of times I did feel ‘different’ than when I wore anything else… even my school uniform. That little boy in the original advert was all smiles and happiness as he trundled around Venice with his mother and, I got a similar feeling wearing my suit. So, despite all my worries about how I looked, I did feel pretty confident when out wearing it. Compared with what everyone else my age was wearing… I knew it was special.

#

I don’t think I looked anywhere near a twelve year old. Even when the waiters brought the celebratory cake and sang Happy Birthday, I think they thought they’d put too many candles on it.

Anyway, we had a good time, the restaurant and food were both fun as the waiters kept us (and the other customers) entertained throughout the evening. They couldn’t see the thick nappy under my stylishly longer shorts and now Geoff had stopped his ribbing everything passed off really well.

Mum and dad had got me a baseball cap that had a LED light in the rim, which lit up. This was completely unlike my parents, normally they’d be far more practical but I loved it. I’d never seen such a thing before so thought I’d be unique on the estate - trendy at last.

To my surprise both Joe and Geoff were envious of my new acquisition and wanted to try it on. The cap didn’t go with my suit but I didn’t care, this was something different and I thought how wonderful my family was to have given me such nice presents.

Auntie had bought me a very special looking fountain pen for school. I felt, for a few moments at least, quite grown-up, that is until I realised my nappy was soaked and I hadn’t known I’d done it. Well, I knew how I’d done it I just didn’t feel it happening, which was a worry.  

The fact that I now changed myself made me wriggle in the seat, nervous of going to the men’s room, in case it made for a bit of a downer on this special event. I also wasn’t sure if mum had brought spares because I hadn’t. Also, I didn’t want to give Geoff any further ammo and, as it was all going so well, didn’t want to draw attention to myself. So, I swished around in a very mushy nappy until we got home.

Strangely, because my trendy long blue shorts were hiding my ‘accident’ so well, I felt really at ease. No one but me knew and the thickening material between my legs, although damp, was quite a comfort. I sneakily ran my hand over the front of my shorts and felt the slippery vinyl bulge beneath. I sighed in grateful relief that my wetness was so well contained.

As mum would say: “Thank God for plastic pants.”

#

Before the party came to an end, auntie handed me yet another wrapped present and said she hoped it was just what I wanted but told me not to open it until I got home. I couldn’t wait. The package was soft so I gathered that it might be some more new clothes, perhaps something else the clever Mrs Goodall had concocted, but, after what auntie had bought me over the last few weeks, I was hoping she hadn’t gone to too much expense.

All in all it had been a fantastic night. Despite the fact I knew Joe and Geoff thought a ‘fun’ restaurant was a bit uncool for them, they joined in with all the merriment. I don’t know if mum and dad had said anything (I hoped not) but I was just pleased it had gone off so well.

As auntie left in a taxi I promised her I’d go and visit her again in a couple of weeks, which she was pleased about. She was also pleased when mum told her about the positive comments she was getting from the school even after only a week. They nodded knowingly to each other. My continued wetting wasn’t mentioned once, for which I was grateful though I’m not sure if either mum or auntie had guessed I was soaked.

#

When I got home I opened auntie’s second present, I’d expected some new colourful Mrs Goodall pyjama creation, or something similar, what it was were my first pair of long trousers. I slowly pulled them from the wrapping and was excited to see that they matched the shorts of my suit and clearly what I’d hoped for from the very beginning.

My birthday was getting better and better and, typical of auntie; she’d got me something she knew meant a great deal to me. At last, when I wore my suit, I would no longer feel like a little kid. I was so excited.

I eased down my suit shorts over my swollen nappy and kicked them onto my bed. I wasn’t sure if I should change first but I was just too eager and quickly slipped the special item up my legs. They were a little long and I found it difficult to fasten the catch at the waist. I realised that I’d only be able to wear them if I wasn’t wearing thick padding. Auntie had given me what I wanted but, in giving them to me, there was an encouragement to try and stop wetting.

Mum was standing at the bedroom door as I tried them on.

“Oh sweetheart… you’ll look terrific in them.”

She came over and tried to fasten me in.

“Ahh, I see what auntie planned here… do you?”

I nodded.

Actually, I wasn’t sure what to make of it. I thought I’d be grown-up about it but I felt disappointed, as if wetting was something I could stop. If I could, don’t they think I would have by now?

#

She poked a finger up the leg-hole of my plastic pants.

“C’mon mister, birthday boy or not, we’d better get you out of this wet nappy and into something drier.”

I was about to do it myself but mum took charge, slowly stripping me out of my best clothes (and hanging them up) and easing down my plastic pants. The thick fabric was well waterlogged so she got a towel and dried me down.

Although mum had given me the independence to change myself, and it was something I was proud to do, I really liked it when mum did this and I felt quite relaxed as she powdered and tightly pinned everything in place. A new pair of blue vinyl pants was pulled up and over the padding and she asked if I wanted to come down and watch TV for a bit. It was well past my normal bedtime but was suggested as a bit of a treat because of my birthday.   

I’m not a late night person so I told her I was quite tired and that I’d like to go straight to bed. She kissed my forehead, said she hoped I’d had a terrific birthday (which I had) and bid me goodnight as she closed the bedroom door.

After a couple of moments I got up and went to the closet. I reached in and pulled out the onesie and the matching shorts Mrs Goodall had made and put them on. I struggled in what little light there was to fasten the snaps between my legs but once they were closed my protection felt tight and safe pulled up against my crotch. I fed the shorts up and over the bulky material and crawled back into bed in fleecy luxury.

My thoughts then went to my family and how well my twelfth birthday had gone and how brilliant they’d all been. Then I thought of auntie and how she could still surprise me with her kind-heartedness. Over the last couple of weeks she’d supplied me with so many wonderful things and, with the long trousers; she’d once again made me happy… and given me a target.

I snuggled down under my blankets and felt fantastic. I was clean and cosy but before I fell asleep completely, I pushed my hand beneath the shorts and stroked the fleecy front of my slippery bulge and had to admit it was the best feeling ever.

#

Sunday morning I awoke having slept the best in a long time. My dreams had been fun; at one point Joe, Geoff and I were in the same football team and we all scored, which was something strange for me as I didn’t play for any team. My two brothers are both excellent players and in their school’s first team line-up. How I managed to get involved I’ve no idea but nonetheless I also scored. I was wearing a nappy (and I believe so did Geoff) but we still won with everyone cheering our success.

Even with my nappy obviously visible as I ran around the field making some excellent tackles and passes of the ball, no one said anything. It gave me a feeling of belonging, which I don’t think I always felt.

I also woke up and didn’t feel wet, which was another plus, so I wandered down to breakfast wearing what I’d slept in.  Mum and dad were at the table but neither of the other two had yet surfaced.

“Morning sweetheart.” Mum smiled, whilst dad smiled and nodded.

I half expected the usual question of “Are you wet?” but it never came up. I suppose now I was twelve I should know when I’m wet and able to change myself if warranted.

Mum asked if I wanted a cooked breakfast but I was still relatively full from the meal the previous evening so settled for a slice of toast and a cup of tea.

I felt quite at ease with the way I was dressed and wriggled in the thick, padded comfort between me and the chair. I even quite liked the soft rustling of the plastic pants as I made myself even snugger.

#

Now I had a pair of long trousers I tried them on again, this time without the padding. Like the rest of my suit there was ample room for growth and I’d need to turn-up the legs when I wore them. I was very pleased I had them but realised that I was happy wearing the shorts version and this understanding sent a shiver through my body. I’d had this feeling before, where wearing shorts and protection made me feel okay, even if I looked the part of a much younger kid.

This became even more apparent on Monday when at school because there was now only Graham Greenwood and myself in class who were still in shorts. Graham’s family were Jehovah’s Witnesses, I’m not sure why that made a difference but everyone thought that was the reason he was still in shorts, whilst mine was because of the nappy.

It was also at this time that one of the other shorts wearers from another class came up and wanted to be friends. He was of the opinion that we shorts wearers should stick together to avoid any trouble from those who’d pick on us. As we were a small vulnerable group it did seem a good idea. We very rarely got comments from kids our own age but some boys, two, three and four year’s older thought it fun to take the mickey. We weren’t bullied, the school would never stand for such a thing, but the occasional baby talk and suggestions to ‘go back to primary school’ did surface.

We didn’t have a ‘gang’ name as such but at break times we did tend to stick close together so any name calling wasn’t aimed at one boy. Daley was a tall boy and looked frankly ridiculous in shorts but his mum had said that whilst his shorts still fitted and were in good order, she wasn’t made of money so refused to buy him anything else. However, Daley was also good at football so was used to wearing his sports kit and it seemed very little bothered him.

I asked him fairly early on how he coped with wearing shorts and being so tall where he’d obviously stand out in a crowd. He said that there was just him and his mum and he wouldn’t do anything that he knew his mum couldn’t control. Money was thin on the ground but she’d been so proud of him gaining admission to the school, he wouldn’t say or do anything that might upset her. They were a tight family… just the two of them.

#

I was asked by the group about my nappy-wearing so told them when it started but that I had no idea why. However, I confessed that most mornings since it had started I woke up soaked and because of the ‘accident’ in class, the headmaster insisted I wear protection whilst on school property. That is, until I could prove I don’t need them… and that was proving quite difficult.

I’d had a few minor accidents at school but nothing that would have drawn the attention of matron or the teachers, I’d happily let my damp nappy and plastic pants take the strain. However, at home, night time things had gotten worse and waking up in very wet protection had become the norm. But now it was up to me to sort myself out, so I wasn’t bothering anyone else with my problem. I’d happily change myself and put the stuff on to soak and wash. The garden may well have been festooned with my drying white fabric nappies and fluttering plastic pants but despite wet mornings I felt I was in some kind of control.

There seemed some sympathy for my plight but in general, as my bulky bottom and smoothly shaped crotch only occasionally became the centre of attention, it was forgotten about by the troop of shorts wearers. Money was the real reason the few of us were still in shorts. Our families simply didn’t have the funds for new clothes until what we had was worn out… and even then it might not happen.

With my shorts still riding up over my thighs the plastic pants were regularly seen by everyone and although there were a few giggles and comments, most people had got past caring. I hadn’t told any of my friends about Barnaby Blue just in case they thought I was childish, although I was quite happy when I got home, and after all my homework was finished, to read another fascinating chapter about this nine year old’s powers of deduction.

As the weeks transpired I was getting pretty good grades, nothing that would put me into the dizzying world of the clever Aziz, but enough for mum and dad to feel proud of me again. They may not have said that they weren’t proud of me but I could tell that although they believed a change of school was to stop me feeling pressure, they were a little disappointed I hadn’t adapted to senior academic life very well. However, they now saw that despite still wetting at night, the nappy I had to wear was no barrier to me getting on so it had become less of an issue to them and my brothers.

#tbc#

[CDfm]

Great chapter. I was so Happy for him. His birthday was just about perfect. He finally has his long pants. I do think that making the pants so that he can’t be in a nappy when he wears them is wrong. He can’t control his wetting any more than I can. I would feel like they thought I was lying about my control issues. I was happy I could give this a like and as always I am looking forward to reading more. 

[Les Lea]

Thanks for such a lovely response... I am always pleased to receive your comments CDfm....

[Les Lea]

Part 18

 

My nightly routine had become just that, a routine. I sorted myself out and didn’t answer to anyone other than me. I kept up the regimen that mum and auntie had insisted upon; thorough cleaning followed by loads of creams and lotions. They’d also insisted that I kept the area clear of hair, which I did; mum had bought a special cream for that. Meanwhile, I’d become very adept at folding the fluffy material in just the ‘right’ way and pinning it into place. And, after smoothing the entire thing down, expelling the excess air, I proudly made sure everything was tucked within the plastic pants.

 

Mum had come to some agreement with a supplier at her work so I was able to have access to both disposables, which I used infrequently, and fabric nappies with special insets and folds to contain any extra padding needed. All-in-all I was well provisioned and took it in my stride as more of my nappies got pegged out on the line each day. It told anyone who was interested that things weren’t getting any drier in our household.

Although my parents were concerned about my continued incontinence, the doctors had assured them that it would just as easily stop, as it had started, with no particular reasoning behind it. However, now I could do the change myself, for me at least there was a feeling of utter contentment and reassurance.  My thick nappy (those insets and folds proving their worth) seemed as much a part of my sleeping arrangements as anything else.  

#

I spent many weekends with auntie and between us we redecorated the attic bedroom and re-sorted all the stuff she’d accumulated there. It was a project we both threw ourselves into and I’d never seen her happier than when the task was complete and celebrated with a huge cream cake at a job well done.

While I didn’t realise it at the time, auntie was preparing a bolt-hole for me. Somewhere I’d be happy to be who I wanted to be, should I need it. We cleaned up and painted an old set of drawers, which was destined to hold all the nappies, plastic pants, lotions, creams and powder, as well as an assortment of fun items I didn’t yet possess, or know I wanted. Mrs Goodall became a regular visitor as she presented various new outfits that auntie suggested would be ideal for me. I acquired some of the cutest and snuggest designs from a woman whose imagination and sewing abilities left me speechless. She took the concept of the short onesie that fastened between my legs to a whole new dimension and created some pretty spectacular outfits.

Although I normally now changed myself, I loved it when auntie took charge and did it for me. To a certain extent I knew I could hold my pee at times but, this freedom, to go where and when I wanted (not necessarily needed) was something I took great pleasure in. I think auntie had already realised this because at one point, when fluffing out a new, soft piece of fabric ready to slip under my well powdered bottom she said.

“These days you’re a very happy boy... getting you out of nappies is going to be a difficulty...”

She smiled knowingly but didn’t finish her train of thought... and I blushed tremendously. I knew I didn’t want to be babied, I never had, well I wouldn’t have admitted it, but I did love the smooth, taut, bulkiness that she always made sure surrounded my groin. I loved the love that went with it.

When we went anywhere I always wore my suit with shorts. I’d grown to love the look and I could feel the padding being supported by the crotch, which in turn was supported by the braces. With each rustling step, and auntie’s constant pride in the way I wore it, I felt even happier than the boy in the advert had on his visit to Venice.

#

Back home mum and dad more or less left me to it and both my brothers didn’t seem all that bothered. However, they did comment if I began to smell of pee, but it was never in a nasty way, they just wanted me to be aware so that I didn’t make others too conscious of what I was wearing. I was a twelve year old in a nappy and although on our council estate this was something to be mocked, jeered and criticised by the other kids it didn’t bother me. This was simply because one week it was my turn, the next, the lad with ultra-thick glasses, or the cheap trainers or whose sister had just got pregnant. The neighbours had more going on than to think my protection was anything special.

As the weather grew warmer I was wearing only protection and a thin t-shirt to sleep in. It felt wonderful slipping around the bed, the plastic pants sliding effortlessly over and between the sheets. This had become quite a game for me and a highlight of actually going to bed. The slippery action was quite a turn on as my burgeoning sexuality was testimony to. To be truthful, I had no idea that’s what it was, to me it was just something that felt good, and so continued to do.

My nappy, especially my bulky night time nappy, had become fun and with all the creams, lotions and plastic I was also exposed to... I found I could entertain myself for hours simply getting ready before I went to sleep. At times I felt like a very naughty boy by enjoying my nappies and not resenting them.

#

Mostly I have dreamless nights though occasionally the TV sets off something in my head and my dreams include that subject. One night I’d seen another programme about fishermen and that night I’d struggled to get this one enormous lobster landed on board a very small trawler. At least this time it hadn’t tried to get inside my pants but the oilskins I wore glistened throughout the sea-tossed tussle. Those snapping claws ripping the glossy, slick material as I fought to get the beast under control. I woke up not only wet but with all the bedclothes strewn around the room as if there’d been some kind of titanic battle.

When I had ‘normal’ dreams thankfully they weren’t about my brothers picking on me. In fact, since Geoff had been reprimanded neither had really mentioned much at all about my ‘problem’. No, my dreams often involved some of my school chums, Barnaby and nearly always other younger kids. We’d be off on some pleasant adventure and in rare cases I was leader of the gathering. Nappies didn’t play a major part but I got the impression we all wore them, though I couldn’t be sure. In the morning I’d wake up worn out but happy and the warm damp sagging material seemed even less bother than it once had.

Twelve years old and still wearing a nappy should have troubled me, the whole idea of wetting myself and having all the hassle of changing into something dry, should have dragged me down… but it didn’t. I was feeling at ease with both my juvenile side and my student-at-grammar school side. I no longer had to prove I was grown-up by wearing long trousers because they meant very little now I’d come to accept shorts suited me and my situation better.

To be honest, wearing thick protection under ‘adult’ long trousers just didn’t work. Although they hid the bulk pretty well, I was never convinced or happy with the result. I decided that without doubt a nappy should be worn with shorts.

Like Barnaby’s questioning mind and little blue suit, my shorts and nappy had become my trademark, they set me apart from other boys my age and I quite liked this eccentricity.

Mum had commented that I should spend more time with auntie because, after each visit, I returned with a completely new way dealing with things. Whatever auntie said had made the difference and she was pleased for me that I’d become “…more attentive at school.”

In some ways I could see it, my attitude to school was definitely better. However, here was a dilemma; there was still an immature streak, which to me my nappy represented. There was certainly something other than protection going on when I wore one and I think it helped me identify with those who were younger… even if they weren’t wearing one as well.

This was a wonderful insight. I no longer yearned to be accepted as something I so plainly wasn’t.

I came to realise that a battle of sorts was going on inside me which I wasn’t sure I could control; my attitude flipped-flopped as one side gained advantage for a short while before the other took charge again.

Auntie’s love and understanding brought out my more childish side. The suit and short pants, together with the nappies, epitomised everything about me; the side that loved to be looked after, the side that was desperate to please, the side that loved the attention and enjoyed a lack of restraint.

Meanwhile, at home, a more serious side tried to dominate, although not very successfully, but that might have been down to my real desire to be a kid again. When I closed my eyes and went to sleep something told my brain (it had nothing to do with me, honest) that I had to prove I was still only a little kid. I suppose being able to wet myself when and where I wanted without anyone else necessarily being aware was quite liberating... and definitely regarded as quite childish.

There were two Adams; one wanting to be thought of as a grown up enough to manage a senior school day, whilst the other, more fun and immature, who liked nothing more than being irresponsible, even if that meant wearing protection.

#

So, almost a year at grammar school and I was no longer bottom in class. In fact, my grades in the end of year exam had shown a remarkable improvement that my report card was bristling with positive comments.

The headmaster’s final summation was very constructive.

·         “...although Adam has made incredible progress in the past year, we still see some lapses of maturity. However, as he moves up a year, I am hopeful he will apply himself totally to the opportunities school has to offer.”

 

Mum and dad were content for me to stay at the school even though I was still wearing a nappy. They said if I could handle it, so could they and therefore, I wasn’t going anywhere. I’m almost certain auntie had something to do with that decision, although my better grades might have helped.

I spent more time with auntie, we seemed to have a common connection that I didn’t have with my family even though they had been so supportive. We talked at length about Barnaby, the aristocratic boy, the kids at the aquarium and even the boy from the advert, all of whom auntie thought had helped me put things in perspective. I’d worn my nappy under the long trousers that went with the suit but... it never felt proper. Indeed, now I had a pair of long trousers of my own, they gave me an awkward feeling, my legs felt strangely trapped and my protection uncomfortable.

I now had piles of nappies both at home and at aunties where there was never any doubt what I’d wear. Although I always felt like a kid when I wore them, I didn’t see this in a negative way at all - they had given me security and comfort from the first moment I wore them. The confidence I now radiated in both school work and play was down to them... and of course my protective plastic pants.

My self-assurance had only started when I first wore auntie’s present. That confidence grew when I wore my Italian designed blue suit more often. The feeling of disappointment about it being for a child because of the short pants soon evaporated after all those early, positive comments. The praise from adults about the way I looked, the pleasure I experienced when I wore it whilst accompanying auntie anywhere, somehow that suit, together with the nappy underneath, gave me a belief in myself that up until then I hadn’t possessed. It was a surprising yet potent combination.

It was with pride that I chose to wear shorts rather than the long trousers auntie had provided and where ever we went I thought I carried the stylish design with an elegance that made heads turn. My smartness was making me the centre of attention, whilst the nappy was a comfort and prevention from any mishaps... and I loved it.

###

I love the time Adam spends with me but I see and understand more than he does. He’s still really only a little boy and isn’t aware exactly what is happening to him.

 

I see his incontinence isn’t going to just disappear – he’s enjoying it too much.

 

At the moment he may not be that aware but all the signs are there that this isn’t just a passing fancy. I also know that as he grows older things might become a little bit more awkward for him, at home and at school, and he’ll be forced into making some difficult decisions.

 

I want him to know he always has a place to come, and an understanding person that will always be there to support him.

 

As his auntie I hope that would go without saying but my sweet, childish, lovable nephew needs his nappies and I’ve made sure that he has plenty, along with the juvenile clothes I know he has an affinity for.

 

He may be twelve now but what happens (and where would he go and who can he share his desire with) as he grows older?

 

I want him to feel safe in my house.

 

I want him to be happy with who he is.

 

I want my innocent baby nephew to enjoy his childhood... no matter how long that lasts.

 

#######FIN########

[Sarah Penguin]

awww but but i wanted more! it was too good!

[maly]

Brilliant as always and so glad you finished it.

Thanks for a very good read.

Maly.

[Les Lea]

My pleasure, glad you liked it.

[puffy_bottom]

great story, great ending!

[Les Lea]

Thank you very much

[CDfm]

While I am sorry to see this story come to an end , it was a good ending that left lots of possibilities. I am sure that Adam’s Auntie is going to ensure there is always going to be a time and place for him to go to enjoy his nappies. Again I was happy to be able to give this a like. 

[Les Lea]

Thanks for your comments as always, most grateful for them.

Hope you caught the fact that Mikey's brother and Quentin were aiming to have a future together... eventually.

[Pierry Louys]

7 minutes ago, Les Lea said:

Thanks for your comments as always, most grateful for them.

Hope you caught the fact that Mikey's brother and Quentin were aiming to have a future together... eventually.

I think you posted in the wrong story ! Mike and Quentin is in your baby dick story hehe

and i really hope see more of little Adam maybe a epilogue when his aunt babied him to make stress away and him liked to be a little toddler with his auntie changing and feeding him eheheh 

[Les Lea]

Thank you sir..... I feel such a fool.  You are quite correct and I shall cover myself in sackcloth and ashes. 

[Pierry Louys]

10 minutes ago, Les Lea said:

Thank you sir..... I feel such a fool.  You are quite correct and I shall cover myself in sackcloth and ashes. 

I think to compensate this little error you should write a epilogue where shows little Adam being babied by his auntie !! Hehe