Unsolicited Private Messages From Newbies

[Morv]

Personal opinion here... I've always thought that this particular site was a bit strict on its standards for what to do before you PM someone in chat. I've found myself PMing people when the conversation has moved on and I just wanted to ask them a question about an earlier subject. I don't really bother to ask. I also usually find that I type much faster than other people in the chat room, and usually lots more... often making huge gobs of conversation disappear quickly. I also don't go to the chat room very often.

However, I do aggree that just PMing someone about nonthing, or asking them to be your friend, daddy, baby, cyber-sex partner, or using the "A/S/L" intro are all bad practice and are generally rude. I do not, however, see how it is rude to PM someone saying, "Hey, we were talking about music earlier, and you mentioned you liked 70s prog-rock. I'm a big Yes and Moody Blues fan, and was wondering what bands you listened to from that genre."

Anyway, I get the feeling that the "continue the conversation" type PM isn't exactly that common, nor is it what is being riled against here. If you truly do not even want to receive those types of PMs without previous warning, I daresay, I may offend you once and a while... then again, I hope I'm not counted amongst the unknown throngs of noobs any longer, too.

I also think that it would be cool not to ban people, but able to give them a nice solid shock for transgressions.

[onsie]

Personally I like to be asked before someone PM's me, I always do. Also, the chat room is more interesting when the dialog gets beyond the Hi's and How are you's. Most of us have been around and as a lot were very tolerant, so I say try to keep it in the ROOM. 1Z

[Sunshine2585]

And it's still going on. I just came here to find that someone had left me a PM. It was from a member with no posts and was entitled 'hello girl...,'. The message was less than a line long and said 'hey sunshine, what are u up to?'. I don't know whether the fact that the guy actually used my name indicates that he has seen this thread. If that is why he used my name in the message then I can't understand why he would PM me when he has read the stuff in this thread.

[DollyDiaper]

...Yep Sunshine, and still it goes on. I just got this 'irresistable' PM -

"So, I am sitting here with a soaking wet diaper. And it still turns me on. If you feel like chatting let me know."

You know who you are. Why not find your way around here first, maybe read this topic from the beginning (and other similar ones in the archives here)?

Come and meet some of us and let us know why we would be interested in chatting one-to-one before you hit on us!

D lly

[sirpoopsalot]

We can figure this out logically..and we will, this is our house..and we plan on keeping it that way.

Deep in my heart

Three¹s a house

That can hold

Almost all of you

Spaceball Ricochetby T-Rex-Marc Bolan

I'm just a man

I understand the wind

And all the things

That make the children cry

With my Les Paul

I know I'm small

But I enjoy living

Anyway

Book after book

I get hooked

Everytime the writer

Talks to me like a friend

What can I do

We just live in a zoo

All I do is play

The spaceball ricochet

Deep in my heart

Three¹s a house

That can hold

Almost all of you

I brought a car

It was old but kind

I gave it my mind

And it disappeared

I love a girl

She is a changeless angel

She's a city it's a pity

That I'm like me

I said how can I lay

When all I do is play

The spaceball ricochet

[diaprbayb]

Spaceball Ricochetby T-Rex-Marc Bolan

and this helps how?

[DollyDiaper]

The uninvited PM's have slowed down to a trickle since I started this thread (my main intention in posting it) but I received one over the weekend which I know at least 2 members received, in similar brief form -

Newborn

Group: Members

Posts: 1

friend

would like to be a friend. want to talk?

I think perhaps I prefer the a/s/l variety, if I have to receive any at all, that is. I find the above PM very emotive. I'm not unfriendly, but I don't like the way in which this kind of PM plays on my emotional heartstrings.

However, it's gone in the bin like all the rest, because with one post to his/her name, it's not even possible to decide if I want to talk one-to-one, let alone be a friend.

D lly

[Sunshine2585]

And over a month later, it is still going on. I have got a message tonight. And this time it wasn't from a newbie.

Do you ever wear plastic pants over your diaper. I think they look sooo cute and sexy on girls.

And I wasn't the only woman to get this exact same message. I know of at least one other who got an identical message.

So I am bumping this up again in hope that some of these guys that are still insisting on sending these unsolicited PM's get a chance to see this topic.

[DollyDiaper]

Thanks Suns you beat me to it! Yes, I also got the same word-for-word C & P from an apparent job-lot this evening.

And there's also been an increased flow of unsolicited charmless one-liners in my inbox again this week (around half a dozen at the last count) so hopefully this timely bump will help to reinforce our aversion.

D lly

[WallaWalla]

That's odd, I was sent several pm's.....

[diaprbayb]

That's odd, I was sent several pm's.....

What are you saying?

[Pipsqueak]

I don't get all that many unsolicited PM's anymore but what I find annoying lately, is that I'll receive a notification from the board that someone I have never exchanged even one single word with on the boards has "successfully added me to their friends list". Usually when I go and check out this complete stranger's profile, I'll find the names of other women, along with my own, in his list. It's like this person (and there are a number of them) just picks women at random and sticks them in his friends column. I don't know what benefit they derive from this, but it rather irks me. Shouldn't I be asked first?

[DollyDiaper]

I don't get all that many unsolicited PM's anymore but what I find annoying lately, is that I'll receive a notification from the board that someone I have never exchanged even one single word with on the boards has "successfully added me to their friends list". Usually when I go and check out this complete stranger's profile, I'll find the names of other women, along with my own, in his list. It's like this person (and there are a number of them) just picks women at random and sticks them in his friends column. I don't know what benefit they derive from this, but it rather irks me. Shouldn't I be asked first?

I don't and won't use the Friends option in my profile. It's my personal preference, as I find it divisive and used by some as a sort of competition which I have no wish to compete in. So I was equally irked by what you describe Pip, especially people I'd never heard of considering me a friend and adding me to their list

Fortunately, someone more tech-savvy than I told me how to stop it happening by changing my preferences in the Friends section of my profile. Now no-one can add me to their list willy-nilly, I'm happy to say.

D lly

[Pipsqueak]

Thanks! I hunted down that little control so I should be free of dubious friends from now on.

[Repaid1]

Awww darn! J/K I personally don't get the friends list thing either, but I was asked to be added so that was a plus. Kinda like a competion, I think as well. The other thing..adding you with a list of other women is kinda like a spooky movie! I want no part of seeing. Glad you all turned them off. We know who are "friends" are. BTW I just posted this so I could see my post count turn to 700! Yeah me.

[Pipsqueak]

The other thing..adding you with a list of other women is kinda like a spooky movie! I want no part of seeing.

I'm guessing the thought behind it is that other guys will see all these women friends these guys supposedly have and think they're smooth operators or something.

[DollyDiaper]

I'm guessing the thought behind it is that other guys will see all these women friends these guys supposedly have and think they're smooth operators or something.

I'm thinking you might have something there Pip If that is the case, I'm glad Sunshine showed me how to put a stop to it, as it's no fun for me being just another notch on their metaphorical bedposts.

D lly

[Guest Diaperdragon]

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I would have to say that for me, i get a lot of PM' whether from the

chat room or from the boards from horny guys that want to either add

me as a friend, Ask me about chatting with them, asking for me to be

their mommy or asking me if i want my diaper changed. I just think

that their are some guys that do come on here looking for sex of just

wanting to hang out with them. Even on my IM's i have guys from the

DD that want to IM me about being in diapers, asking me to see their

diaper pics, asking me about wanting to hang our or being diapered

together. The thing that bugs me is that why are these people that r

on here and coming here al they are wanting is sex and changing

someone's diaper. I get Pmed every time i am in the chat room asking

for a chat and sometimes a chat leads to asking me if i want to be

diapered together or wanting to have my diaper changed. That's why

for me, i don't respond to PMs unless i know or chatted with the

person and the same goes for my IM's, if your not on my list, i don't

chat and i don't add anyone to my IM's unless i know them very well.

For here i still don't know how to weed out the ones that want to

truly chat with me and the ones who want nothing more than just sex

and relationship. For instant messengers, i have Trillian all in one

messengers and in that i have a spam challenge and if they don't

respond, i blacklist them and i don't respond to them.

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[DollyDiaper]

I know I will get shot for saying this but here goes What is the problem? I mean it is just a PM or being added on someones Fav list. Pm's can be blocked or deleted. I do not PM anyone with out asking them first (if in a chat room) or if I have something I want to ask a person that I don't want the whole world knowing about.

OK now you can shot me, if you wish I just think some people live to bitch about something. This just happens to be a "something"

Sorry to who ever I made mad.

This is not a "bitch" as you call it.

Have you read this thread from the start, or any other threads in the archive on the same subject? It's difficult to believe you have, or you wouldn't have posted the above, as little of what you say is relevant to what we are objecting to.

D lly

[diaprbayb]

I know I will get shot for saying this but here goes What is the problem? I mean it is just a PM

Ok, here's the problem. These girls aren't getting onsie twosie pm's. they get alot. They overfill their limit which then prevents them from getting PMs from the people they do want to hear from. not to mention the Email notifications

[b0xer21]

So let's say I see somebody in a message board that interests me, and I honestly just want to be friends. How the fuck am I supposed to start a conversation? I'm not about to start a message board thread aimed at one person.

This is what drives me nuts about people. "Let's have a community, but don't message me unless we've messaged before" Makes no sense.

I mean, I agree that all the people wondering around looking for sexual chat with people they've never spoken to before is not cool, but you can't go ignoring EVERYONE. I, for example, have no interest in sexual chat, how soggy your diaper is, or how big your tits are. I've got a diaper and girlfriend of my own to be satisfied with.

i'm with you.

honestly...lets all just whine about every PM we get.

some of you really are babies. you get mad over the lil'st thing.

[Sunshine2585]

i'm with you.

honestly...lets all just whine about every PM we get.

some of you really are babies. you get mad over the lil'st thing.

Oh my god. How many times does this need to be said. The type of people that send these mass PM's are sending them to girls. I assume that they go into the members list and do a search for all the girls and then copy and paste a message to all of them.

So b0xer, the fact that your profile lists you as a guy means that you aren't getting these PM's. So you can't judge whether it is something that people get mad over.

We aren't whining, or getting mad over the littlest thing. This thread was created in the hope that people would see it and be discouraged from sending these messages to the women on the board. And also think about it, the fact that there are way more men here than there are women is something that has been mentioned many times before. And this site is hardly going to attract girls if they come here and are bombarded by PM's from horny guys from the moment they arrive.

B0xer, until you turn into a woman, which I doubt is going to happen, or you change your profile to say that you are a woman, then you have no right to comment on whether this sort of thing is annoying or not.

[pampers6]

Hey im new here and im not sure wot PM is, 'Personal message'? I'm kind of sensing that females and males dont get on too well on these boards, which i guess is fair enough as the majority of men are 'after one thing'. Shame about the males out there that dont care and just want to make friends. Personally i think trying to get a relationship over the net is rather silly

[loopy]

Yea its personely messege, and I think most girls and boys (hate using males/females) that actually contrubute to the forum get along just fine, its the horny net geeks that cause the trouble. Im horny, but I know that its not polite to get it out infront of strangers :X.

I feel the same about net relationships, but on the other hand I have more then a few real life friends I met over the net :/.

[b0xer21]

Oh my god. How many times does this need to be said. The type of people that send these mass PM's are sending them to girls. I assume that they go into the members list and do a search for all the girls and then copy and paste a message to all of them.

So b0xer, the fact that your profile lists you as a guy means that you aren't getting these PM's. So you can't judge whether it is something that people get mad over.

We aren't whining, or getting mad over the littlest thing. This thread was created in the hope that people would see it and be discouraged from sending these messages to the women on the board. And also think about it, the fact that there are way more men here than there are women is something that has been mentioned many times before. And this site is hardly going to attract girls if they come here and are bombarded by PM's from horny guys from the moment they arrive.

B0xer, until you turn into a woman, which I doubt is going to happen, or you change your profile to say that you are a woman, then you have no right to comment on whether this sort of thing is annoying or not.

i just did.

you can scream this until your head blows off into tiny pieces, i still think its pathetic that you guys/girls are getting disturbed by this. its always happened, and no matter how many posts you put up, its going to continue to happen.