Diapers In A Relationship

[PaulCain]

Hi Guys,

I mainly use this forum as a place of support really, and I hope that's okay with everyone.

I've been a DL for many years now and as some of you may know, I told my fiancee about a year ago. She was very accepting about it, to the point of buying my diapers, changing me and even being my 'Mommy' which was fun but not a priority of mine. I get a lot of pleasure from diapers and always have had, something which hasn't changed over all this time. My fiancee and I in the meanwhie, have a fantastic love life and the chemistry between us is as amazing as it was when we first met.

However, here is something I am having a problem with. I feel that when I want to use my diapers that I'm being perhaps selfish or isolating in my pleasures. Does anyone else find this? I struggle to use them because I feel like it's not fair on someone who is not a diaper lover themselves, but has adapted to it quickly and easily for the DL's sake. Has anyone else had this kind of experience and how can a DL best incorporate his interest in a regular relationship? My fiancee has been amazing about all this and I just feel very guilty about my whole interest.

Any views appreciated,

Paul

[DLK]

Look man, if she's cool with it, then there is nothing to feel guilty about. The only way that its selfish in my mind is if you use your diaper to satisfy sexual urges instead of having sex with her. But if there is a balance between diapers and any other aspects of your romantic relationship, then everything should be cool.

DLK

[jenniebear]

Hey Paul,

I'm in a very similiar situation...although i met my Daddy as a submissive and He a Dom....so W/we were already in a lifestyle related arena so to speak...and He knew from day one that i had a diaper fetish and am an ab....

There were many questions in the beginning....but i was patient and only shared as much as He was ready for...i did share some fantasys and it was in this way He finally began to participate...by creating a fantasy related situation for U/us to act out...

i've shared as much as i can about my fetish but never pushed Him...He has a huge desire to know all so that was an easy task...

It has always been my fear that i'd push something on Him that He didn't want or didn't have an interest in.......but He's never expressed any dissatisfaction with anything other then my tendency to go "little" when He needs a "big girl" partner during non intimate times........but that's not really related to diapers....

i show Him pics now and then of diaper girls.....and He seems to enjoy taking those types of pics of me....He even says He finds diaper girls erotic now.........though i still have a hard time believing that......but He doesn't really have a reason to lie about it.....

i guess i don't have guilt about the whole thing......but i also try hard to keep a balance.....i do not ask to be "babied" every day or even every week...i try to choose my times wisely......this may sound obnoxious or too personal....but if W/we haven't had any intimate time all week and it's friday night......while i might ask to wear to bed........i know He enjoys being intimate on a weekend morning so i'll stay dry so i don't take anything away from His spontanaety ........ He knows what particularly turns me on too.......and will take opportunities feed my fetish also.......W/we keep it varied and never put too much emphasis on any one thing and i think that is how i avoid the feeling of making it all about me.....

[WiiBaby]

Try asking her if there's anything she's into! If she gives you nothing, just do things for her. Ask her if she has any chores to do, errands to run, etc. If she's into romantic things, set up a nice dinner, just for the two of you. It all depends on what kind of girl she is, and what she wants out of your relationship. Since you two are getting married, you shouldn't feel strange telling her about your feelings. The best solution is usually to talk about these things, I'm sure she'd be able to give you something to do!

As far as incorporating it into a normal relationship, don't make every night a diapered one. Go to the movies, eat dinner, etc. When you get home you can ask her what she feels like doing. If she wants to be mommy, then great, if not, then do something for her. You should also consider the possibility that she wants to be your mommy, you never know!

Oh, and yeah, I'd feel the same way you do.

--Brandon

[babylin]

['PaulCain' date='Jan 25 2007, 09:35 PM' post=

However, here is something I am having a problem with. I feel that when I want to use my diapers that I'm being perhaps selfish or isolating in my pleasures. Does anyone else find this? I struggle to use them because I feel like it's not fair on someone who is not a diaper lover themselves, but has adapted to it quickly and easily for the DL's sake. Has anyone else had this kind of experience and how can a DL best incorporate his interest in a regular relationship? My fiancee has been amazing about all this and I just feel very guilty about my whole interest.

Any views appreciated,

Paul

[pampermeinia]

My wife/mommy of 12 years is cool with it

[Guest chhockle]

Boy this post hits close to home. I have had the same feelings that you are having. I have even mentioned them to my wife and she reassures me that that is not the case and even though she has done that I still have those doubts in my mind. I think it is great that you are asking the question though because it means that you care how she feels and want her to be happy. Know that you are not the only one who has had those feeling.

Also, thank you for posting this question about it because I'm interested in people responses too.

[BriGuy]

I have had the similar feeling of guilt. My wife is ok with my diaper wearing. She has partook in it once with me but hasn't shown much interest other than that. Sometimes I worry that I am wearing too much, or that she is with holding negative thoughts/feelings about my diaper wearing. Then on other times, I feel that I am not enough of a "man" for her because I like to wear diapers. It's interesting, I used to have issues with just wearing diapers, now I like to wear them, have no issues with them and me personally; I just have issues with how they may be affecting my wife. Its a strange affliction we have here with the diaper thing eh? All I can say is talk about it as much as possible. My wife is starting to share in my excitement for a new diaper... Also, she asked me the other day if I was going to order more because I was running out. SO I suppose its a slow road and acceptance is there, but more learning is needed.

I also thought it would be good to introduce her to other's in a relationship where one likes diapers. It would provide a situation where the couples could find ways of figuring out how to handle it together. Or just have someone who is experiencing something similar to vent to an understanding person. The fact that not many people are into this makes this situation isolated, so even if they want to talk to someone else they probably feel they cant. I suppose two heads is better than one, and four are even better yet?

~Brian

[WetterGuy]

I'm really pleased that my wife is OK with it, too. I think I have asked myself most all of the questions listed above, and it's really good to know I'm not the only one who's asking them.

More than anything, I'm surprised at how many of us have accepting wives. It seems to be more common than I would expect. Perhaps a support group of some sort might be a good idea.

I'm still trying to figure out how to do this in a way my wife might somehow enjoy, even if it means that when I wear a diaper we do something differently. I do try to be extra "cuddly" during that time, and she does enjoy that very much.

I look forward to reading more in this topic.