LilMissGrieves Posted July 10, 2015 Share Posted July 10, 2015 I umm.. Im new here! So hi!I've been kind of lurking around here and there in the scene and I've talked to quite a few people. Most of them are great, and totally support my transition (Either proactively or in a benign away, not affecting my relationship with them). However, I have ran into a few groups now on Fetlife for Daddy/Babygirl stating they are only wanting 'Biological' (Even their terminology is wrong), Babygirl. I was kind of appalled and sure enough, one of my trans friends got ejected because she wasn't a cisgendered female. I have had several people stop talking once they realize I was born with the wrong parts. Link to comment
Tinklebell79 Posted July 10, 2015 Share Posted July 10, 2015 Happens all the time...unfortunately its the nature of life...best thing to do is just move on cuz really there is nothing that can be done about it. Link to comment
Maxxy Posted July 10, 2015 Share Posted July 10, 2015 It happens, unfortunately. I'm not TG myself, but I have a few friends who are. It really is a shame that people can't look past it, but the fact is that some people just can't or won't for whatever reason. Link to comment
lil_angel Posted July 10, 2015 Share Posted July 10, 2015 I always try to make it clear up front that I 2 Link to comment
Born Yesterday Posted July 10, 2015 Share Posted July 10, 2015 (edited) They may have the right to, but Edited July 10, 2015 by Born Yesterday 1 Link to comment
Midwest Babygirl Posted July 11, 2015 Share Posted July 11, 2015 (edited) I'm on several ABDL/Ageplay groups on Fetlife, and I haven't seen any of them exclude transwomen. Edited July 11, 2015 by Midwest Babygirl Link to comment
Dill_Pickle Posted July 12, 2015 Share Posted July 12, 2015 I have been surprised sometimes by how not open-minded some people with kinks are towards different kinks. 2 Link to comment
atryinggirl Posted August 6, 2015 Share Posted August 6, 2015 I feel like I get that a lot myself. Online and off.. Makes me wish I could have stayed in school forever. Things are so much safer and more accepting on campus. It's frustrating, and depressing - but as others have said you don't really want to be in groups (or whatever) with bigoted and hateful people. Link to comment
Saschadzg Posted August 14, 2015 Share Posted August 14, 2015 Fetishists tend to be quite conservative sometimes. Link to comment
atryinggirl Posted August 14, 2015 Share Posted August 14, 2015 Fetishists tend to be quite conservative sometimes. How so? If I may ask, you have me curious as to why you say this? Link to comment
Baby Brian Posted August 14, 2015 Share Posted August 14, 2015 I'm interested in hearing this too. Given the dictionary pegs fetishes as being sexual in nature, what exactly do you mean by saying they are conservative too? Link to comment
Elfy Posted August 14, 2015 Share Posted August 14, 2015 I'm interested in hearing this too. Given the dictionary pegs fetishes as being sexual in nature, what exactly do you mean by saying they are conservative too? Link to comment
Bettypooh Posted August 15, 2015 Share Posted August 15, 2015 (edited) No matter the 'group', the people in it will all vary in things not directly related to the grouping On this site we will not make a distinction regards this- you are who you feel you are inside and that is how we feel it should be for everyone everywhere But we can't control them and their sites nor should we. Edited August 15, 2015 by Bettypooh Link to comment
Baby Brian Posted August 15, 2015 Share Posted August 15, 2015 Absolutely! The only way to counter a misguided belief is to correct it when ever it comes up. I don't blame everyone for saying it though, that's just what they have been told before. They're just propagating it, which is why I keep trying to correct it. How else do you believe we're going to get it right? Link to comment
Elfy Posted August 16, 2015 Share Posted August 16, 2015 Except you are bringing it up even when no one else is... And your plan of repeating something over and over to browbeat people into thinking what you say is right, it doesn't change the fact that it isn't. You need to not be afraid of the word "fetish" it doesn't lessen the importance of diapers to you or anyone else. I could equally say AwakenEvil as a fetish for fast cars, or I have a fetish for football... Doesn't mean we want to have sex with cars or footballs, it means for us it is "An object of unreasonably excessive attention or reverence" or "An abnormally obsessive preoccupation or attachment; a fixation." It is interesting how the sexual meaning of the word has gained prominence over the non-sexual meanings, probably something to do with people repeating over and over again how a fetish as to be sexual until some people just believe it unquestionably. To the OP and anyone else interested, we do our best here to not exclude any TG person. They are judged on how they act and treat others just like everyone else. I would advise if you experience any harassment or anything like that to message any of the admins because we all take a very dim view to anti-TG sentiment Link to comment
Baby Brian Posted August 16, 2015 Share Posted August 16, 2015 Except you are bringing it up even when no one else is... And your plan of repeating something over and over to browbeat people into thinking what you say is right, it doesn't change the fact that it isn't. You need to not be afraid of the word "fetish" it doesn't lessen the importance of diapers to you or anyone else. I could equally say AwakenEvil as a fetish for fast cars, or I have a fetish for football... Doesn't mean we want to have sex with cars or footballs, it means for us it is "An object of unreasonably excessive attention or reverence" or "An abnormally obsessive preoccupation or attachment; a fixation." It is interesting how the sexual meaning of the word has gained prominence over the non-sexual meanings, probably something to do with people repeating over and over again how a fetish as to be sexual until some people just believe it unquestionably. To the OP and anyone else interested, we do our best here to not exclude any TG person. They are judged on how they act and treat others just like everyone else. I would advise if you experience any harassment or anything like that to message any of the admins because we all take a very dim view to anti-TG sentiment You might want to double check that. The only time I correct someone from saying diapers = fetish, is after Link to comment
Elfy Posted August 16, 2015 Share Posted August 16, 2015 Of all dictionaries you pick to get a definition, you go to the urban dictionary! From oxforddictionaries.com: An excessive and irrational devotion or commitment to a particular thing: men will never understand a woman 1 Link to comment
Baby Brian Posted August 16, 2015 Share Posted August 16, 2015 Of all dictionaries you pick to get a definition, you go to the urban dictionary! From oxforddictionaries.com: An excessive and irrational devotion or commitment to a particular thing: men will never understand a woman Link to comment
Saschadzg Posted August 18, 2015 Share Posted August 18, 2015 How so? If I may ask, you have me curious as to why you say this? Sometimes conservative fetishists think, transpersons are like themselves, living a "fetish" 24/7. Link to comment
atryinggirl Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 It took me a long time for me to accept myself as trans because I'd convinced myself I was in some sort of way too serious fetish. But when your "fetish" makes you cry yourself to sleep every night - there is more than that going on. I don't know how to change that mentality, but I can say I know the dangers of it first hand. That being said I wasn't sure quite why the original statement was said, so thank you. Link to comment
Bettypooh Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 Multiple definitions and interpretations cloud things up instead of clarifying them; like 'labels' a word or phrase can cover a lot of territory. It's incumbent on the speaker to use words which will make their meaning clear to the one(s) listening to them if they can, and it is equally incumbent on the listener(s) to try to understand things as the speaker intends them Regarding the OP's topic, it is incumbent on everyone to understand that not all persons who are born with a vagina are chromosomally XX female nor are all persons born with a penis chromosomally XY male. There are those who were born with both types of body parts, and there are those who were surgically altered almost immediately after birth to make their body more specific to one birth-sex or the other. That is done without the person's consent of course, and is often done without the parents who give permission fully understanding all the implications involved In the latter cases, the parents often say nothing about the surgery to the child later on unless it becomes clear that there is a gender-related issue with them. And of course there are those who have surgery to more closely align their body more closely to the person they are inside. In all cases, it is not what body parts you have or don't have that make you who you are- what is in your heart and mind do that Which brings us back around to those who want to define you otherwise based on something which knowingly could be in error Just because they were lucky enough to have been born with a closely aligned birth-sex and gender, they think that somehow makes them better than those who were not so lucky; it is essentially a prejudice much the same as racial or gender or xenophobic discrimination and as such it is just as equally wrong 2 Link to comment
atryinggirl Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 I'm not sure how to respond to that other than thank you. And a profound thank you at that. Link to comment
Saschadzg Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 I I don't know how to change that mentality, but I can say I know the dangers of it first hand. Link to comment
atryinggirl Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 I guess that's Second Life? That's fun - and there is nothing wrong with that. But I meant more IRL... Link to comment
Saschadzg Posted August 22, 2015 Share Posted August 22, 2015 (edited) I guess that's Second Life? That's fun - and there is nothing wrong with that. But I meant more IRL... Yes, that was second life. Here is the RL castle. Edited August 22, 2015 by Saschadzg Link to comment
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