Trying to accept myself again

[MetroGnome]

Yeah, I can't get rid of everything I own, so I'm just going to get a fireproof safe with a key, so she can't open it (right now I have a combo lock). I guess I will just never talk to my Dad about that again.

[Baby Brian]

I'm surprised you didn't tell him what diapers mean to you, how much they help you to distress, and how they are a part of you (like it or not). If you did, then he would have known he just rejected you at the same time.

Still, at the very least he knows about them so you don't have to worry as much about being found out. That in its self is a positive outcome to your conversation. I suppose it's all in how you look at things that determines if they are good or bad. Try not to hang on the bad that's all.

[MetroGnome]

I'm surprised you didn't tell him what diapers mean to you, how much they help you to distress, and how they are a part of you (like it or not). If you did, then he would have known he just rejected you at the same time.

Still, at the very least he knows about them so you don't have to worry as much about being found out. That in its self is a positive outcome to your conversation. I suppose it's all in how you look at things that determines if they are good or bad. Try not to hang on the bad that's all.

I wish I could hAve he made it so weird, he didn't want to talk to me about it, unlike my mom who had questions and was honestly interested Nd displayed her care and acceptance....he just kinda told me he didn't think of me any less (which honestly didn't feel genuine). I guess if I want to look at things positively at least I got the reaction and acceptance I wanted from my mother. I'm happy I have one parent who actually cares and accepts me. Ultimately I feel closer to my mother now. I'm just going to kinda pass off my dads reaction in hopes of self acceptance..also I kinda want to exspress myself through some DL drawlings and what not. I'm hopping I can quiet my intense urges. Unfortunately working first shift and all I don't exactly have time to wear them while I'm at my dads. Oh well :/ ill finda way. Thank you for the advice to think positively...I will, I need to stop fighting myself!

[id0ntknow]

I need to stop fighting myself!

This is very true, and I can speak from experience on that. Before I told my parents, my depression and self hatred for these feelings were strong enough that I would secretly wish to be killed in a car accident going home from work or something like that. Just be sure to always tell yourself the good things in your life, and that will help you through the harder times.

[Baby Brian]

^ And this is why it's so important to tell others close to you. What happened with your dad is also why I tell everyone they need to direct the conversation. Not everyone is going to understand, let alone be comfortable talking about it.

Sorry to hear you weren't able to follow through with telling your dad. May I suggest you try again (soon). It might help you to write down what you want to say too. This way you can make sure everything gets said regardless of how uncomfortable either of you may be.

[id0ntknow]

^ And this is why it's so important to tell others close to you. What happened with your dad is also why I tell everyone they need to direct the conversation. Not everyone is going to understand, let alone be comfortable talking about it.

Sorry to hear you weren't able to follow through with telling your dad. May I suggest you try again (soon). It might help you to write down what you want to say too. This way you can make sure everything gets said regardless of how uncomfortable either of you may be.

Sorry, but I'm unsure if this was directed towards me, or Metro?

[Baby Brian]

Sorry, but I'm unsure if this was directed towards me, or Metro?

The first part was for everyone, the second part was for metro.

[Bettypooh]

The way Iook at things is this: If a "lose" would cause harm, then any outcome which does no harm is a "win" So it looks like a win to me, even if you had hoped for more. Sometimes that's the best we can get, but it sure beats losing!

[MetroGnome]

This is very true, and I can speak from experience on that. Before I told my parents, my depression and self hatred for these feelings were strong enough that I would secretly wish to be killed in a car accident going home from work or something like that. Just be sure to always tell yourself the good things in your life, and that will help you through the harder times.

I have had those thoughts before, a lot sometimes....

[MetroGnome]

^ And this is why it's so important to tell others close to you. What happened with your dad is also why I tell everyone they need to direct the conversation. Not everyone is going to understand, let alone be comfortable talking about it.

Sorry to hear you weren't able to follow through with telling your dad. May I suggest you try again (soon). It might help you to write down what you want to say too. This way you can make sure everything gets said regardless of how uncomfortable either of you may be.

Ya idk if I will I feel like he has repressed it by now, and i kinda don't want to go thorough that again. I think if I do, it will be because the found something. Thanks for the advice though.

[MetroGnome]

The way Iook at things is this: If a "lose" would cause harm, then any outcome which does no harm is a "win" So it looks like a win to me, even if you had hoped for more. Sometimes that's the best we can get, but it sure beats losing!

Bettypooh

True. I guess he knows now and that's kinda what I was shooting for. So I guess it was a win.