First Time In Public

[greg55]

So I am a relatively new DL, I only started wearing diapers a little over a year ago, and it has always been a very private thing for me. I have never felt comfortable in being around others, let alone leave my apartment. But I decided today it was time to change that. Thanks to finding this place I have been more secure in my love for diapers. So today after my shower after work, I put on a nice clean diaper, and some jeans over that. Two of my roommates were home, with two girls coming over. It was amazing to have the diaper on and just relaxing with everyone. Then, around 3 am I took one of my roommates to the airport for his trip to Maui. Then those of us left, we went to Walmart. (The closest Walmart for me is like a 45 min drive, so going to Walmart is a big deal) All of this happening with my diaper on. It felt so liberating. I didn't pee in it, but that wasn't because of being in public. Its just that I personally prefer a dry diaper to a wet one. I felt like I could finally be myself you know? The next step I wanna take is to tell someone. I already have an idea of who I can trust, but for all you out there, how is a good way to tell someone that you like to wear diapers? I am really nervous about it...

[Bettypooh]

I'm not sure how I'd tell someone about this part of me- all I know is that I'd prefer to keep it private until someone comes along that really needs to know. It's easier for me to handle that way Usually the best approach to any odd subject matter is to tailor your words to the individual you're speaking with, and to begin with some innocuous hints to see if there are any unknown strong feelings there This is not where you want bad surprises Stretch things out over several conversations and see if they 'take the bait' and begin asking you questions Then if it looks OK you can move forward; if it looks bad you can still escape Never go faster than they're comfortable with or you are likely to lose them

That's the method I used when I came out as TG and it worked well I couldn't always 'feel my way through' with everyone but only one couldn't see where I was going until I bluntly said what I had to say With all the others there were some clues that made the job easier. But what may be most important of all here is for you to know why you're doing this as much as you know how to do it. What do you expect to benefit by telling someone? Are those expectations likely to be met? What if they aren't met- how will you handle that? I mean would you really expect roommates to say it's OK for you to go around in only a diaper? I kind of doubt that you'd get that much acceptance even if they personal didn't care because they'll be thinking of visitors coming over too. Your expectations have to be realistic! And then there's always the "What will happen if...?" questions to consider. Things can go very wrong once your secret goes beyond your control and you need to be ready for that possibility too.

This is a lot to think through so give this some time and see how you fell about it in a couple weeks- you have the rest of your life to deal with this and a couple weeks is nothing when you reach my age While you're doing that, go out in public some more to let the newness wear off. As you get used to it your thoughts and wants may change. You can live wearing diapers 24/7 discreetly with few knowing or even suspecting a thing. It's not an act of hiding, it's just a method of dealing with it that many of us chose and it might work best for you too. If a time comes later on when it's best to tell someone that door will still be there for you and you'll be better equipped to go through it gracefully and successfully then

Whatever you choose, Best Wishes to you!

Bettypooh

[greg55]

Thanks Bettypooh for the advice. I don't really expect my roommates to be ok with me just hanging out in a diaper, nor do I want to. One of them is a huge ass and very closed minded. I will always be discreet about it, I just like the idea of sharing this part of me with someone outside of the cyber world. And thanks for the idea of easing it in the conversations. I will definitely give that a try. I'm not sure exactly how to do it, but I'll ease it in somehow.

[Bettypooh]

In my past I learned something called "situational awareness" and it's still with me Just keep your eyes and ears open and when there's an outside influence (TV, radio, conversation, etc) about anything ABDL make a small non-committed comment on it then watch the reactions. You will know what you're doing, but done correctly they won't There is freedom in not hiding but there's also a risk of problems that didn't exist before. So long as you've thought it through thoroughly, coming out is usually a non-event or a small one. And usually there will be one or two who will become even closer to you because of your trust and honesty There are always surprises in life so count on nothing and you won't ever be disappointed.

In parts of my life coming out as a DL would work and make my life much better, but in other parts it might cause me grief Since I can't keep those parts from ever meeting for me it's best to keep this on the QT. I don't like that but I can live with it so that's my choice. I have the "I wear for need and I don't really want to discuss this with you" excuse in my pocket every time I go out the door just in case I need it It will come out at a personal relationship level someday if I get the chance because this is an important part of me that is going to last as long as I do So just like my going public, going 24/7 or coming out as TG I don't think it will make much difference when that time comes. And if it does, then so what

Bettypooh

[dl_ashlee]

Personally being a DL should be a need to know basis only.

Really think hard on why you want someone else to know about your fetish. Have they talked to you about any of their fetishes?

Seriously this is really the kind of stuff only a GF/BF/SO needs to know.

The only other time I think it would be okay to share fetishes with others is if you go to fetish events with friends.

Seriously telling friends has many more possible cons to it then pros, I would highly advise against it.

Do the opposite of Nike's Slogan. Just Don't Do It!

[Amyuser]

Yeah no kidding i am incontinent everybody in my life knows that, but something deeply personal like your DL side there is no need to tell someone because no one really keeps secrets they will tell someone who will tell someone and so on until one day someone you never intended to know, says i heard such and such about you is this true ?? or worse the person fakes understanding and acceptance and then starts writing it on bar bathroom walls are you really prepared for things like this after only 2 years of diaperdom and 1 liberating experience , or even worse than that the person you tell gets ahold of your Family and tells them so they can all do an "intervention" and turn you away from what most people associate wrongly with pedophile's . this is the kind of trouble you could buy -so make sure you know the true price of admission before you pay your money.

[DiaperPony]

Was thinking about this recently in regards to potentially getting a roommate. I was thinking, hmm I should tell them about this DL stuff, but tell them not to worry because it wouldn't involve them and they'd never know. Then it dawned on me.. if I kept to that promise, there would actually be no reason to tell them in the first place, because they'd never know.

[greg55]

Ya the person I was thinking about telling was my roommate. I am just afraid that he is going to find them and be like, what the heck? But, I still don't know if I am or not.

[Bettypooh]

Time is on your side before you tell them anything Better to have all the allies one can get, I say!

If you're careful and discreet they may never discover anything But then again keeping a secret does tend to create disquiet inside of many people and that's not good It's Greg55's choice and call to make. Should I be discovered I will say that I wear for need- which is true- and go from there based on who discovered this I don't have to make any distinction between a physical and psychological need; both are real needs that humans have to meet in order to have a good life I don't have to say that neither of my needs are continuous and require full-time wearing either. I won't be lying and I'll be in control of the situation, so that's all I care about. The rest is up to fate and I can handle it

Bettypooh

[rusty pins]

I'm not sure how I'd tell someone about this part of me- all I know is that I'd prefer to keep it private until someone comes along that really needs to know. It's easier for me to handle that way Usually the best approach to any odd subject matter is to tailor your words to the individual you're speaking with, and to begin with some innocuous hints to see if there are any unknown strong feelings there This is not where you want bad surprises Stretch things out over several conversations and see if they 'take the bait' and begin asking you questions Then if it looks OK you can move forward; if it looks bad you can still escape Never go faster than they're comfortable with or you are likely to lose them

That's the method I used when I came out as TG and it worked well I couldn't always 'feel my way through' with everyone but only one couldn't see where I was going until I bluntly said what I had to say With all the others there were some clues that made the job easier. But what may be most important of all here is for you to know why you're doing this as much as you know how to do it. What do you expect to benefit by telling someone? Are those expectations likely to be met? What if they aren't met- how will you handle that? I mean would you really expect roommates to say it's OK for you to go around in only a diaper? I kind of doubt that you'd get that much acceptance even if they personal didn't care because they'll be thinking of visitors coming over too. Your expectations have to be realistic! And then there's always the "What will happen if...?" questions to consider. Things can go very wrong once your secret goes beyond your control and you need to be ready for that possibility too.

This is a lot to think through so give this some time and see how you fell about it in a couple weeks- you have the rest of your life to deal with this and a couple weeks is nothing when you reach my age While you're doing that, go out in public some more to let the newness wear off. As you get used to it your thoughts and wants may change. You can live wearing diapers 24/7 discreetly with few knowing or even suspecting a thing. It's not an act of hiding, it's just a method of dealing with it that many of us chose and it might work best for you too. If a time comes later on when it's best to tell someone that door will still be there for you and you'll be better equipped to go through it gracefully and successfully then

Whatever you choose, Best Wishes to you!

Bettypooh

The best advice! Take what Bettypoo has said to heart!

[Dubious]

Half the fun with wearing diapers outside is the thrill thinking "can it be seen" "did they notice" etc.

and no, I dont want my diaper fetish to get out, ever, so if u tell ppl some of that fun will go away since for strangers it dosent really matter, butthats just me...

[binkydiaperboy]

WILL ANYONE NOTICE?

[greg55]

I wanna thank all you who have replied to this. There has been a good back and forth going. Your comments have helped me in my thought process of whether or not to tell my roommate. I am still going back and forth if I wanna tell him or not, but you guys have given me a lot of pros and cons to think about.

[dl_ashlee]

Hiding from room mates should be fairly easy, just have a locked trunk or a locking file cabinet and they will never be the wiser. I would probably get a UPS Box also if you want to be extra careful, but your room mates should never be opening any packages you receive anyways. I probably would still get UPS Box personally as it just puts the mind at ease.

[Guest Diaperdragon]

or I would make sure boxes are shipped unmarked or marked with a different name or logo

[DiaperPony]

IMO, if they snoop and find something they didn't want to see, that's their problem, not yours. I wouldn't even offer an explanation.. I'd probably say something like "thats really none of your business, you shouldn't have been in my room looking in my private things".

[dl_ashlee]

Um, yes it is your problem as they now know and you live with them. Meaning you either have to deal with their reaction each day or move out.

[greg55]

After much consideration I have decided not to tell my roommate. My diapers are in a place that there is no way he can find, so that shouldn't be a problem. Thanks everyone for your input.