Puppy Is A Little Down At The Moment, Was Gonna Give Up Diapers.

[padded_husky]

Well I just got paid yesterday and My check was a little bit lower than I am use to. The company I work for has cut my hours so things for the next two weeks are gonna be tight. I was not gonna buy any diapers for the next two weeks and try to take it easy but I don't think I can do that. I have been doing pretty good about not having anxiety lately but about an hour ago I started to have some anxiety. I find myself at the moment wanting to put on my diapers but I don't have any and I was not gonna buy any but now I am thinking about taking some of the extra money I have and buying myself a pack for at least night time. Right now I really want to put on a diaper with some fresh powder. Then I want to get my Pajamas on and snuggle up in a nice blanket and my teddy.

Part of me wishes I could give up diapers permanently but I don't know if that is possible nevertheless healthy. I mean I know that they don't hurt anyone and that I should do what is happy but when I think about future events I worry that it is gonna cause me to have a difficult time. I mean there are things that I want to do as a furry. I want to go to furry conventions but a big thing about that is you normally have to share a room with someone when you go. I have furry friends that not only go to the local convention but they go to other conventions in the country as well. Usually when you go to a convention you share hotel rooms to save money but in my case that is not so easy. I mean, I worry that no one will want to room with me because I am a kidfur. babyfurs and kidfurs have such a bad reputation of being annoying, difficult, messy, or disgusting and I am none of those things but I just worry about the people who I like hanging out with turning there back on me once they find out. I mean I would never push that part off me on anyone and the only thing I would ask of them is to just accept me and hope that they don't mind. I mean I would never appose it on anyone and I would be as private about it as I could even if they knew.

I guess that is why I wanted to give them up for know and if possible permanently. I also worry about meeting someone someday to share my life with. I mean I am no where near ready at the moment and I do know someone special that is also a babyfur that I think might someday be someone I could see myself with but lets just say that me and that person are not right for each other. I don't know I mean I just worry about meeting furs and them wanting nothing to do with me because of my little side. I mean I am not really into regression either. I realize now that I have a dependency on diapers. It makes me happy and it makes me feel good. It makes me feel special and safe and that is something I guess I just can not change. When I have anxiety, I know that it helps clear my mind and make me feel better. I think that I need to find out regardless, what my triggers for anxiety are. I need to find out what triggers my anxiety.

I just wish life was not so complicated and I wish things where not so difficult to deal with sometimes. I wish that the world was more accepting of people and I wish that I did not worry like I did. Maybe I just need to realize that I need diapers. Maybe I just need to realize that I am just a diapered puppy and that is OK. Maybe I need to just plan diapers in my daily budget as a necessity from now on. I just want to be happy and I just want to get things in my life in order so that I can be ready for a relationship. I truelly feel lonely sometimes and I dream about the day that I can wake up next to someone special. I dream of the day that I can wake up with someones arms wrapped around me. I dream of someone kissing me on my neck and telling me to rise and shine. Then that person telling me to go and change out of my diapers and hop in the shower cause I am a stinky puppy. I am not saying that I want a mommy or daddy but I am just trying to explain a dream of being with someone who is ok and understanding of that part of me. I guess I have felt alone all my life and I don't want to be alone anymore. I also realize that maybe im not ready for a healthy relationship yet. I need to figure myself out first. I need to work on being happy with myself first. Anyways, this pup is a little down at the moment. I think I am gonna go out and buy some diapers and some powder for mah tail. I have more to say that I am trying to figure out but I will blog about that later tonight. All are welcome to read it but You already know (if not from this post ) that my typing can get out of hand. I need lots of Hugs from anyone who is willing to give it. :)Puppy needs hugs bad!

[timmyc]

thrift stores, you can get some screaming deals on diapers

[Daddy Fred]

I've been trying to put myself 'in your shoes' PaddedHusky, trying to see things as you do. It's a dilemma isn't it?

On the one hand you have to live in the real world and all its difficulties (like slim paycheques), and on the other it's so nice to just ignore it all, forget it all and go back to the warmth and comfort of a nappy/diaper.

So you look for "something" from another person, but you don't quite know what, maybe someone who can 'save' you from the kind of problems you're facing and maybe help you to be in that state that seems to relieve the anxieties that keep coming over you.

So just what can you do to make things easier?

Not a lot it's true, but there are a few attitudes you can change, gradually, with time.

What do I mean exactly by attitudes? I mean that some of the ways you're reacting to circumstance are the result of attitudes that are redundant and don't fit the way you are right now, but maybe fitted ok when you were little. As you have found out, the real world of "other people" can be pretty uncaring, and from what you say, you've not found a caring person to look after you in the ways you need.

If I said to you that you have two personalities, one who deals with the world and all its warts, and a second, partially hidden personality that comes from way back when you were an infant, would you disagree? Do take a little time to consider that way of looking at yourself (not easy!).

Once you can see things from a different direction, new possibilities open up for you, just because you are AWARE of them by changing your attitude/approach. By seeing your two personalities, one who deals with the real world, and a virtual one who is attached but by no means the same, you could find the anxiety states coming over you might start to subside, and the fear of being found out by your friends/colleagues can be felt for what it is - not that important. You can work out reasonable excuses for your private life such as being a touch incontinent or whatever suits. You might even discover someone who likes you BECAUSE you are seen as vulnerable by them. Not all those people would be hostile to your condition -- right?

Daddy Fred.

[Dill_Pickle]

So just what can you do to make things easier?

Not a lot it's true, but there are a few attitudes you can change, gradually, with time.

Husky:

To all of us on the board, it is perfectly OK if you are temporarily out of your padding whenever it suits you. It's also OK if you get some cloth padding, and it's OK if you find yourself dry at the end of the day, having used a toilet, so that a package of disposable padding lasts you two weeks, and there's more

$$ for other important things in your life, like getting to that furry con, or keeping your transportation in good shape. Many of us, including myself, find the desire waxes and wanes over periods of weeks to months, and wear some days and weeks and months, but not others.

Take care of YOURSELF. It is probably best, if you are going to share a room at a con, not to need diapers at the con, but wearing diapers can be pulled off. Just disappear into the bathroom with your clothes and shower before bedding down, and pull pants on when you first awaken. A pair of swim trunks to sleep in works well for this.

The other important trick to making diapers work for others is to be consistent. Imagine, for a minute, that you had no choice about it. How would you act if found out? Slightly embarrassed, yes, but not very different than you do about a hundred other things you *have* to do in your life, like brushing teeth, and getting the car fixed. On the other hand, if you freak out, you can expect a different reaction.

Dill Pickle

[padded_husky]

I have been thinking a lot about things and I will say that I don't know why I fight it. I mean why do I fight that which I have no control over. Of course I am not talking about bladder control because I have that...at least during the day. I do wake up sometimes in the middle of going while I am sleeping but that does not happen all the time. What I don't no is why I fight my desire to wear diapers. I have a personal goal that I have been contemplating for the past week. Because i was made fun of from elementary up till 9th grade, I think I learned at an early age to hide who I am so that I would not get made fun of. I am so afraid of someone finding out who I am that I never drank alcohol because I was afraid that I would get drunk and tell everyone my secrets. that is why I have never been to a party and I have never been to a club. lol Like I am gonna have a drink or two and then get black out drunk or something and the next thing I know, I am telling all my friends that I am a furry who likes to wet diapers.

I think that is the real issue that I have. I am afraid to do things that I want and I am afraid to be myself because of what others might think. I think that I hold myself back from what I want out of life. I mean for an example (I am a little embarrassed to say this) as a furry, I have always wanted a collar. I actually have a collar at pet smart that has dog bones on it that I am in love with. I want that and this dog bone id tag for it that will have kato written on it (my fursona name). The thing is I would only wear it to these furry meets I go to every Tuesday but I am to embarrassed to wear it even there. (yes it is out in public) the funny thing is I decided that I wanted to do it because one of the other furs at the meet wore one a few weeks ago and did not care. He did not even get any dirty looks but yet I am embarrassed to do it.

the only reason why I fight wearing diapers (when I do) is because I let what other people may think of me affect who I am. I view other people (on here and out in public) that are so open about themselves and don't care what other people think of them and I wish I was more like that. I think that I need to reach a state of mind where I don't care what other people think. I should not let anyone stop me from being myself. So what I like huskies, so what I like collars, so what I like diapers. I should not let someone else discourage me from being myself. That is why I even think about giving up diapers because to be honest, I don't want to give them up. I want to stay a diapered puppy for ever. I want to wear whenever I want. I will probably have times that I decide not to wear but I don't want to give them up. I want to be one of those people who doesn't care what others think. I think that is important. As far as being able to afford them, I guess I am just gonna have to prepare for times when I can not afford them. either that or I am gonna have to give something up for them. I am thinking of giving up my smart phone and going back to a regular phone. that would save me 30 bucks a month. When I move out, I just will have to give up cable. I mean there is always Hulu.

[curiositykilledthecat]

The key to happiness is balance my friend, the more you obsess and repel the worse off you'll be. Find your harmony in this lifestyle and you'll be okay.